if you want i can try again lmao but not tonight

We sit together at lunch and laugh
and I watch the way your eyes travel the length of my jawline
and I wonder what you are thinking

i take your phone so you stop taking pictures of me because you know I hate that
you try to take it back and we wrestle and for a moment it’s all contact
and I can’t concentrate or breathe right
so I let go and give it back

i want to text you but I won’t
not again not this time
i saw the way you looked at that girl in English, I won’t be the one you’re missing tonight
so I call my best friend and we talk but you are still in the back of my mind

i just wish I knew what you wanted from me
i just wish I knew how to give it to you.

—  Life lines and pocket change– Lily Rain