if we all gave up when things were hard in the beginning

december 31st, 2015, 10:23 pm: i saw you for the first time. you were talking to a girl and i could tell that you were capturing her with every syllable that left your mouth. and i knew why: you were beautiful and bright, and i was drawn to you even then, like the planets are drawn to the sun.

december 31st, 2015, 11:58 pm: we met standing in line for the bathroom. you introduced yourself, and asked for my name, smiling when i gave it. “lovely,” you murmured, and repeated it a few more times, rolling the letters around in your mouth like a new food.

january 1st, 2016, 12:05 am: i could still feel you on me, your lips, minutes, hours, months later. the clock had struck midnight and you just grabbed me, didn’t ask if it was okay until it was over. you were laughing, brushing it off, all teeth and well-kissed lips, but i knew i saw you blushing. 

january 21st, 2016, 1:12 pm: you got my number through the mutual friend that threw the party. i still don’t know how you got my address. i didn’t remember telling you. you couldn’t tell me, either.

february 14th, 2016, 9:12 pm: you took me out to dinner and bought me chocolate and roses. it was all so cliche, and i loved every second of it. when you kissed me good night, i swore i could feel the rest of my life, pressed right up against my lips.

february 26th, 2016, 11:33 pm: we made it official. i remember how you asked me, how shy you got, like you didn’t know what the answer would be.

march 17th, 2016, 5:43 pm: we spent the day at the saint patrick’s day parade, and you filled yourself with beer and kissed me hard against the bar bathroom door. i drove you home and that was the first time you told me you loved me.

march 18th, 2016, 9:24 am: you called me and told me you loved me again. “i want to make sure that you know i still mean it when i’m sober,” you said.

march 24th, 2016, 1:09 pm: i met your parents at easter brunch. you had demanded i come with you, and i was glad i did. your mother was kind and beautiful, and your father was warm and handsome, just like i knew they’d be. after we’d eaten, your mother got me alone. “he’s never brought a girl home before,” she told me, “normally he isn’t very open about who he’s dating. but you, you’re different. don’t read into this, but i think he may really think you’re special.”

april 12th, 2016, 8:31 pm: you saw me naked for the first time, and you kissed every inch of my skin. i’d never felt that much love from anybody before that night, and i haven’t since. not even you could replicate those few hours.

may 5th, 2016, 4:57 pm: we fought for the first time. i ran into my ex at the grocery store and wanted to chat for a few minutes. you didn’t. when we got in the car, you told me that if i was still in love with somebody else i could just leave, and i told you that you should trust me and not be so insecure about our relationship. we screamed the whole way home and you slammed the car door when i dropped you off. i almost crashed three times on the drive home.

may 6th, 2016, 8:03 am: you came by with flowers and breakfast. “I’m sorry,” you told me, “you just mean so much to me, and the thought of you ever being anyone else’s makes me sick.” i smiled, “but you don’t have to worry about that now. i’m yours.”

june 16th, 2016, 10:51 pm: for my birthday you took me out to dinner and gave me a beautiful necklace with a silver chain and pearl pendant. we drank expensive wine and stumbled back to my place and fucked. i had never been fucked before, not like this. i woke up the next morning with bite marks on my neck and hickeys all the way down my stomach, but you were gone. “had to run,” you’d written on a post it note, “i love you.”

june 18th, 2016, 2: 41 pm: i hadn’t seen you since my birthday and you weren’t picking up when i’d call.

june 19th, 2016, 3:13 am: “ had to run,” the post it note had said. maybe you were running from me. i couldn’t tell if it was the 3 am darkness talking or the part of me that already knew.

july 1st, 2016, 4:01 am: i looked over at you, sleeping in the darkness beside me. when we were together, things felt perfectly normal. but now, i could feel the shifts. “are we falling apart?” i whispered to you, and although i hadn’t expected an answer, the silence broke my heart all the same.

july 4th, 2016, 6:47 pm: we were at a barbecue and i saw you across the crowd, talking to a girl. i saw the way she was drinking up every word that escaped from between your lips, and that’s when i knew. that’s when i knew you weren’t mine anymore.
july 21st, 2016, 7:08 pm: i brought it up to you. “i think we’re starting to grow apart,” i said, “there’s a distance between us that wasn’t here before.” you reassured me that it was all in my head, but i didn’t hear it in your voice. i didn’t see it in your eyes. you knew it was there, too, but unlike me, you weren’t trying to do anything to stop it.

august 10th, 2016, 11:37 pm: i lay awake and thought about what your mother said, all these months later. “don’t read into this.” but of course i did. i couldn’t help myself. fuck, i loved you so much.
august 15th, 2016, 1:12 pm: you invited me over and i discovered that the key you’d given me no longer worked. “i had the locks changed,” you said, “i’ll get you a new one.” it was a lie, and i knew it. you didn’t get me a new key.

september 8th, 2016, 2:00 pm: i caught you cheating. in a desperate attempt to revive the romance we’d had at the beginning of our relationship, i bought dinner and brought it to your place. when you finally opened the door, i saw it written all over your face; the way your eyes widened, the way your jaw dropped, the way your cheeks drained of color. i heard it in the stammer of your voice, the sharp intake of your breath, the grinding of your teeth. when the girl walked up behind you, half naked, asking who it was at the door, i already knew. “how could you?” i whispered, and you just opened and closed your mouth. the girl pieced it together and started screaming. she hadn’t known. i left the food at the doorstep.

september 10th, 2016, 1:49 am: you never called after that, never came by, never reached out, but it wasn’t like we’d needed to confirm anything. i knew it was over, but it took every ounce of willpower i had not to go back to your place and find out why, why everything.

september 27th, 2016, 6:20 pm: i kept finding myself huddled in a ball; in my bedroom, in my kitchen, in my shower. not crying, or yelling. just huddled, clutching my body close to myself, staring. still not understanding.

october 31st 2016, 9:01 pm: i spent halloween haunted by the ghost of you. your face was around every corner. i could still feel your touch trickling down my spine. that night, i lost it. the anger surged through the sadness and bubbled to the surface. i screamed until my throat was raw, screamed at nothing, about nothing, for no reason other than i was too full.

november 10th, 2016, 2:17 am: you called me when you were drunk and i answered. i listened to you ramble, vomiting up apology after apology. near the end, you told me you loved me. “call me tomorrow when you’re sober if you still love me,” i said.  you didn’t. 

november 25th, 2016, 7:15 pm: i went out on a date with somebody new. they didn’t pull me in like you did, but for a few hours, i forgot about you and i felt okay. i drank myself to sleep that night so i wouldn’t have to think about you. the next morning, the hangover hurt more than you did. it was a start.

december 24th, 2016, 8:12 pm: i was spending christmas with my family, and i was doing great until my aunt asked about you. i told her you cheated, but i was doing okay, and then i excused myself and threw up the appetizers into the toilet. i called you then, and when you picked up, i let out a sob. “you ruined me, you fuck,” i croaked, “and you can’t even apologize. not when you’re sober, at least.” there were a few seconds of silence, and then you hung up. i still hope that it ruined your christmas.

december 31st, 2016, 10:23 pm: i saw you for the first time in months across the crowd. it made me sick to know that even after all that had happened, you were still the most beautiful person in the room to me.

december 31st, 2016, 11:55 pm: you found me in the kitchen. “i wanted to tell you i’m sorry,” you yelled over the music, “and i miss you.” and in those final moments of the year, i thought about it. i thought about letting you back in. the countdown started, and you moved closer to me. and i.. i pushed you away. i turned away from you and said, “no. i can’t.” and i walked out of the room.

january 1st, 2017, 12:05 am: i have forgotten how you felt against me, your lips. and for the first time, i am finally okay with that.

—  a year in review -c.h. // instagram: @evanescent.love (via @poeticaffinity)

Putting Lipstick On A Pig

by reddit user Pippinacious

Except for the whole murder thing, Courtney James seemed like a lovely young woman. She was bright, articulate, a dedicated college student and well liked waitress at a popular restaurant.

I met her when she was sitting in an interrogation room at the precinct. She was a bit on the larger side, dressed conservatively in pastel colors and minimal makeup, and when I came in, she introduced herself with a polite smile, as if we were meeting for a job interview as opposed to a police investigation. She had declined to have an attorney present, so I got right to business.

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Yuri!!! On Stage Event Report!

So today (4/29/2017) I went to the Yuri on Ice Yuri on Stage event. To clarify though, I was not at the actual Tokyo event, rather a live viewing at a local movie theater. Which of course does alter the experience but it’s the next best thing. At first I thought the theater was only doing the afternoon session, but very last minute I ended up being able to attend both!

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rollingstone.com
Harry Styles: Singer Opens Up About Famous Flings, Honest New LP
One Direction's Harry Styles goes deep on love, family and his heartfelt new solo debut in our revealing feature.

January 2016. There’s a bench at the top of Primrose Hill, in London, that looks out over the skyline of the city. If you’d passed by it one winter night, you might have seen him sitting there. A lanky guy in a wool hat, overcoat and jogging pants, hands thrust deep into his pockets. Harry Styles had a lot on his mind. He had spent five years as the buoyant fan favorite in One Direction; now, an uncertain future stretched out in front of him. The band had announced an indefinite hiatus. The white noise of adulation was gone, replaced by the hushed sound of the city below.

The fame visited upon Harry Styles in his years with One D was a special kind of mania. With a self-effacing smile, a hint of darkness and the hair invariably described as “tousled,” he became a canvas onto which millions of fans pitched their hopes and dreams. Hell, when he pulled over to the side of the 101 freeway in L.A. and discreetly threw up, the spot became a fan shrine. It’s said the puke was even sold on eBay like pieces of the Berlin Wall. Paul McCartney has interviewed him. Then there was the unauthorized fan-fiction series featuring a punky, sexed-up version of “Harry Styles.” A billion readers followed his virtual exploits. (“Didn’t read it,” comments the nonfiction Styles, “but I hope he gets more than me.”)

But at the height of One D–mania, Styles took a step back. For many, 2016 was a year of lost musical heroes and a toxic new world order. For Styles, it was a search for a new identity that began on that bench overlooking London. What would a solo Harry Styles sound like? A plan came into focus. A song cycle about women and relationships. Ten songs. More of a rock sound. A bold single-color cover to match the working title: Pink. (He quotes the Clash’s Paul Simonon: “Pink is the only true rock & roll colour.”) Many of the details would change over the coming year – including the title, which would end up as Harry Styles – but one word stuck in his head.

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Dearest Jane Fans –

I want to begin this letter by telling you about the magic of Brett Dier.  He took a character – built from the beginning with secrets and moral lapses – and made him so likable, so funny, so sincere in all the right ways, that most of our writers’ room became #teammichael by the end of the first season.  And I honestly don’t think I’ll ever love a moment on our show as much as I loved Michael’s vows to Jane…  Which is to say, this was a devastating episode for us to write.

It was also a decision made very early on, when I thought about our story as a whole.  And even in season one, I knew it would be a hard thing to actually do, which is why there was a line (which many of you noticed) about how Michael would never stop loving Jane.  And the Narrator confirmed, “For as long as Michael lived, until he drew his very last breath, he never did.”  Honestly, I put that line into the script at the last minute to hold our feet to the fire, to make sure we went through with it.  Because even back then, the writers could all see the magic of Jane and Michael together.  Not to mention Rogelio and Michael!    

The other reason I put that line in the script was to prepare you… a little.  If the writers and actors loved Michael so much, then I knew it would be devastating for the fans.  So then, the only surprise we had left, was when…

And again – that goes back to the magic of Brett Dier.  Originally, I thought Michael would die earlier.  But Brett is such an incredible actor – he gave us such great comedy and drama and first-rate exposition delivery (!), often all in one scene.  And he and Gina… well, there’s that word again – magic.  So, we changed some things in the writers’ room.  Jane and Michael got married.  They had sex. They moved into their first home. And I’m so glad we did that and I’m so glad all those firsts for Jane were with Michael.  But this is a telenovela, as we so frequently remind you.  And we are only at our midpoint.

You’ll recall, back in the pilot, Jane was on a path.  Things were mapped out.  And then she was accidentally artificially inseminated and everything changed.  Well now, everything is changing again.  How does our romance-loving hero move on, how does she get back the light and the hope…?

Well, it’s certainly not quick.  And that’s why we’re now three years later in our story.  We’ll be flashing back to those three years and filling in gaps, but mining emotions realistically is something we work hard on and we knew the immediate pain of that loss would overwhelm our storytelling.  After talking to grief counselors, this felt like the right time to reenter Jane’s journey.  She’ll always feel Michael’s absence (and trust me, we will too), but it opens up our storytelling in new and exciting ways, while allowing for the light and bright Jane world that we love to write.  

Which brings me to something I feel really badly about.  The timing.  I’ve had so many tweets lately about how Jane is a bright spot these days. And I know you just watched a gut punch of an episode.  So, I just wanted to reassure you that Jane’s optimism will rise up.

Thank you guys so much for watching the show, for caring so passionately, and for going on our journey. And thank you so much to Brett. For his talent.  His passion.  His humor on set.  Michael will be missed in Jane’s world, just as Brett is already missed in ours.  

With love,

Jennie Urman

Hot Off The Press

Another AU where Jacky-Boy is a hockey player and Bitty has a job that involves hockey bc that’s my aesthetic. Anyway, I really know nothing about how the world of sports journalism works so there is probably some inaccuracies in here, but it’s an AU so who cares. Artistic license and all that. Very slightly NSFW (i just wanted to get all the warnings out there). 

***

“Are you into men?”

Jack has been asked this question before, but in such a subtle way (and typically involving Parson) that it’s easy to avoid. No reporter has ever straight out asked him. Besides, he’s not gay. He’s bisexual. So when Jack usually tells them, “No.” it’s not a lie. However, this time it feels different. Maybe it wasn’t just this particular time, but all the times added onto each other that’s finally causing him to really think about what hole he’s digging himself into.

The blunt question has him feeling panicky and the other presser notice his reaction too. Jack can’t say no, because that’s not true. He is into men. Jack’s panic quickly shifts, and now he just feels like shoving the microphones away and storming out, because this is hockey goddammit. Not E! news.

“Excuse me?” Jack clears his throat, trying to buy himself some time to think of a properly crafted response. Over the years, he’s developed a talent for that.

But everything is on overdrive and he feels his breath start to quicken again–

“Are you into men?” Another reporter asks, and it takes Jack a moment to realize that the reporter isn’t asking him. He’s asking the man who popped the question in the first place.

 All attention, including Jack’s, turns to the small blonde that got lost in the bundle of people. He holds up his mic towards the reporter who popped the question in the first place. 

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Teacher picked on me for being autistic, I got her fired.

When I was in 4th grade, i had a teacher named Mrs. Seeles (Like Seals). She was regarded as one of the kindest teachers in our school, to everyone. Everyone but me. I had quite a few learning disabilities that made much of her class confusing and hard to keep up with, especially with the way she taught. She would go over one thing and then have a test on it the next day to see if we learned it, which i always did bad on. 

Now, I was no means a perfect student. But I did my work without complaining, I did homework like i should. My best friend at the time, Jack, would attest to this, as he liked to copy things off my work because he was a sneaky kid. We sat next to each other so it wasnt very hard to get answers from one another. We were both boys so it got a little excitable sometimes and rowdy (not to mention we like-liked each other)

Mrs. Seeles didnt like our friendship in the least, and would always snap at us, more specifically me because i was seen as an easy target. I would never speak up against it or try to do anything, unlike Jack who would demand that we werent doing anything wrong. So she decided to focus in on me instead.

Whenever I passed in class work or homework, she wouldnt grade it. I would get bad reports home saying how I wasnt doing what I was supposed to be doing. All in all, my parents believed her more over me because they never trusted me to begin with. So Jack and I plotted. 

Being only in 4th grade, it wasnt the best plan, but it worked. I would do my work, then Jack would write the exact same things as I did. We did this for months. I would recieve bad grades while Jack excelled in his. We got the papers back. We stored them away.

Near the halfway part of the semesters, We both brought this up to our parents. We called each other on the home phones and explained what had been going on. How Jack would copy my work and Pass it in just like I did, but I never got the credit. We showed them the papers, which were exactly identical. Mine were marked wrong, Jacks were marked right.

My parents were furious. Because of that teacher their child was failing the 4th grade. They threw a fit over at the school board council, gave them complete hell. Within the week, Mrs. Seeles was packed up and leaving the school.

The new teacher that replaced her was wonderful. I went from failing to As in weeks. 

Fun Fact: I actually stopped doing a lot of my homework because of Mrs. Seeles because why do it if it wont be graded? That problem developed heavily into my mind and its been a problem ever since. hope your happy. Graduating from High School this year, going into Theatrical Arts College.

I’ve compiled a list of bughead fanfiction I’ve really liked for everyone in the bughead fam! don’t worry if your fic isn’t on here! this is a pretty small list(i read a lot) and i’ll probably make a p2, hope you enjoy xox. 

  • all in english.
  • most of the fics are on ao3 and some on tumblr. 
  • non completed fics will have *.  

smut 

  • you taste like strawberries by aplaceformyshipstoanchor -  Betty gets a job waitressing at Pop’s Diner and Jughead has no problem watching her work. When a situation at work gets sticky, Jughead has no problem helping Betty clean up. 
  • goldilocks by lusterrdust -  Her hair just does something to him.
  • touch me, tease me by lusterrdust -  Jughead is enamored with her, her blonde hair spilling over them like a lustrous curtain and enhancing the sounds of their breathing. He wants to declare his eternal love. He wants to pour out sonnets and ballads and write novels about every freckle on her skin, every blue shade in her eye. He wants to trace his fingers over every inch of her body until there’s no part he hasn’t memorized.
  • friends with benefits by heytherejones * 
  • third time’s the charm by septemberbeauty13 - “Oh God, get a room!” Cheryl said in passing, pushing past them to get to her locker. That was enough to push Betty into a fit of giggles, burying her head into Jughead’s chest. “You know,” Jughead whispered. “I don’t normally take advice from redheads but this is sound advice.”or Jughead and Betty try very hard to get a room. 
  • resplendent by lusterrdust - A bright light all her own, his shadows are drenched in her radiance. 
  • three words by lusterrdust - Betty is an addiction Jughead never wants to be rid of. 
  • stars by lusterrdust - Despite the gritty, gravelly exterior he presents to the world, Jughead is the epitome of sweet toward her. He’s tender and considerate and just the right amount of reticent to be endearing. And though she loves that about him, Betty’s not in the mood for slow and sweet. 
  • in distance by lusterrdust -  It’s the little things he notices that make him ache for her to come back home. 
  • camp stories by jugandbettsdetectiveagency -  Betty and Jughead end up sharing a tent when the core four go camping. 
  • close calls and getting caught by wordsonpages1 - four times Betty and Jug didn’t get caught doing inappropriate *things* and then the one time they did. 
  • up close and personal (part 1, part 2) by wordsonpages1 
  • they suck at being quiet by heytherejones

angst 

  • fall in light by sylwrites - She moved to New York to find herself, but as the saying goes: wherever you go, there you are. 
  • hotdog by burgerheadjones - “Easy, Hotdog! He’s family.” How Hotdog becomes Betty and Jughead’s family in every sense. Or, where we trace the life of Hotdog with Bughead.
  • the stacks by malmo722 * - After a senior prank goes wrong, River Vixen Betty Cooper is forced to complete community service at the Riverdale Public Library with high school outcast, Jughead Jones. Romance ensues. 
  • the unexpected by spxcewvlker - "She loved that she had found peace in his arms, and comfort in his glittering blue eyes. She loved him.“ In which Jughead helps Betty with her anxiety. 
  • beanie boy by bugheadandjughead * -  “You were lonely, homeless, broken. I just gave you a place to stay.” Beanie Boy Jughead and Good Girl Betty are in it together… until romantic feelings for each other bloom between them.
  • self conclusion by nopleasestayhere - Betty Cooper is sitting at the edge of a cliff, thinking about jumping, when Jughead Jones comes to do the same thing. Betty tries to talk him down. He gives her 48 hours to change his mind. Can they help each other? 
  • drown by lusterrdust - Loss… injustice…unfairness… it’s the ugly truth of life. There doesn’t have to be a reason or a person to blame. Sometimes, misfortune just is. 
  • i’ll wait for you by AGirlNamedWhiskey * - Betty Cooper just wanted to survive her Senior year, but after being coerced into covering an underground racing competition, against a rival school, she knew her life would never be the same. Especially, when she meets the infamous street racer, Jughead Jones. 
  • space and time by agirlnamedwhiskey * - After their abrupt breakup, Jughead Jones is on a mission to win back Betty Cooper. 
  • living with betty cooper by believe_that_you_can_my_friend  - Jughead Jones, facing the reality of having nowhere to stay anymore after the Drive-In gets shut down, finds temporary shelter at the Blue & Gold office. But what happens when an upset Betty Cooper catches him on the act? 
  • red sunrise by lusterrdust -  Lifting her hand up, her thumb twirls the band on her ring finger until the diamond digs into her pinky. She pushes the jewel against the skin until it stings, redirecting her emotional pain into the physical.

fluff 

  • once upon a coffee shop by javajunkie * -  Betty works at a coffee shop where Jughead is a regular customer. 
  • your eyes look like coming home by ariquitecontrary - Betty Cooper and Jughead Jones who have both seen the world in color since they met each other when they were two years old. Everyone always says that they’re so lucky to have met when they were so young, that they have their whole lives to be together and in love. There’s just one teeny tiny problem. Betty and Jughead hate each other. 
  • foldin’ clothes by birdlovesafish -  Jughead contemplates he and Betty’s situation and he does laundry. 
  • it happened one starry night by one_starry_night 
  • skin to skin by burgerheadjones * - Jughead Jones doesn’t know how the crimson crescents ended up on his palms.Betty Cooper is clueless when it comes to the messages on her arms.Soulmate AU where all the little marks and injuries belonging to Betty and Jughead start finding themselves on each other’s skin. 
  • drop in the ocean by lusterrdust - She can feel the tickle and scrape of coarse sand against their bare legs, but pays it no mind. Her focus is consumed with her boyfriend’s touch and the trail of heat his fingers leave against her skin. 
  • the exception to the rule by ShirlyGallagher 
  • do you believe in fate? by Jennimisk * - Is there such a thing as a coincidence? Or do we create our own reality because of the choices we make and the people that we let into our lives? Regardless of what you believe, sometimes you just need to be open to what the universe is throwing your way.This is a non-canon AU work based on Jughead and Betty during their college years. They have no prior relationship before meeting in Rome, Italy. 
  • dry run by Naoko Asakura - She drew a line and offered to let him cross it. 
  • lost and found by lusterrdust - Maybe as a seventeen-year-old, sneaking kisses with the blonde he’d been in love with at the time—maybe he’d had a thought or two of her as a mother; a boy’s fantasy of the blissful domesticity he never had. 
  • red lipstick by lusterrdust -  She pulls the passenger mirror down and wipes her red lipstick off, smudging the color across her skin and marking it in a way that reminds Jughead of bee stung lips after a kiss. 
  • to the first of many by jugandbettsdetectiveagency - Betty’s first Mother’s Day begins with a not-so-welcome wake up from Hot Dog. 
  • first apartment by peacelovebughead - A short series of one-shots of Bughead in their first apartment

series

  • break free and run by sylwrites - A Bughead college AU set in Boston; featuring Veronica and Betty as roommates, and Jughead living off campus with his dad. 
  • fall in light by sylwrites * 
  • like home by lusterrdust * 
  • bizarre love triangle by ficmuse * - When Jughead stumbles upon the yearbook from the Class of 1991, secrets are revealed that will forever alter how the teens of Riverdale view their parents.
transcript of the speech i gave at Vassar’s black baccalaureate service

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, honored guests, and the Vassar class of 2017.
Just saying that aloud made me feel old. Class of 2017? Most of y'all were born after dark-skinned Aunt Viv left the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. That’s wild.

I want to first thank you for allowing me to be a part of such a special moment in your lives. I am honored, privileged, and a bit in disbelief that you asked me of all people to give this address. I try not to have feelings, and I’m going to do my best not to cry today, but no promises.

I’m here to stand in the gap between you and your parents and guardians and any other elders in your lives that you stopped listening to because you thought they were wack and out of touch. I remember being in your shoes not TOO long ago, and it is my fervent prayer that something that I say here today will help you avoid some of the mess I went through.
To be honest I’m a little nervous, but I figured there was no way could this be worse than when Betsy DeVos went down to Bethune-Cookman, so let’s get started.

As you transition to life after Vassar the changes will be both inevitable and swift, so I’d like to begin by giving you some well-intentioned advice and warning you about the continued process of becoming an adult.

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That Really Happened (M)

Genre: Smut

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Word count: 2,864

Summary: You and Jungkook have been best friends since you were little kids, but it turns out that the games you used to play together have different results as adults.

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Yuri on Ice 2017/02/11 all night event report

I’m back from the event and I’ll write a report before going to sleep, mostly because I’m sure I will not be able to decipher my scribbles when I wake up… It’s not the full talk show since you can’t record it and also I couldn’t possibly write down everything, but I tried to take note of most things, especially stuff that has never been mentioned elsewhere. In the end it became quite long so I guess I was able to get most of the stuff down…

Needless to say it’s my notes, so other people might write about parts I omitted, etc. To be honest quite a few of the things they said especially in the beginning, like what the seiyuu think about their characters, is something I’ve read so many times in interviews that I could almost answer in their place, lol… I was a bit disappointed that one of the questions that was answered is the one about Chris’ mysterious acquaintance, because actually Kubo answered that in Pash already (it’s in the Q&A part I’ll be translating later), and I hoped they would feature questions about stuff that hasn’t been explained yet. Well I guess not everybody reads interviews, but still…

Due to the format of the report you can find my comments here and there, mostly in brackets.
Under the cut because it’s long.

I forgot to mention something important: the ones participating in the talk show were Mitsurou Kubo, Toshiyuki Toyonaga (Yuuri), Junichi Suwabe (Victor), Kouki Uchiyama (Yurio).

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malec-go-to-hogwarts  asked:

hi cassie :) i've been a fan of the books since 2010 and it's been amazing to see how much they've grown in terms of popularity and audience. I would love to know whether you came up with the idea to write the eldest curses because of how popular Magnus became and the reaction to him or was the idea in your head from the beginning and you decided to finally write it :) also could i be cheeky and ask for a snippet from the lost book of the white preferably featuring Alec....

I was excited to write the story of Magnus and Alec Having An Adventure and Falling More In Love for a very long time, but my ability to do so was limited by the way publishing and distribution worked back in 2005, when I was initially trying to sell City of Bones. There was a lot more resistance to gay characters in YA at that time. A couple of publishers turned the book down because Alec, a gay character, was in it. The Barnes & Noble website page for City of Bones included a review from Commonsense Media where they gave it a content warning for “sexual content” just because of the presence of a gay character even though he never did anything sexual. A lot of big box stores refused to carry the book, and major children’s book clubs passed it over. 


I always hoped for systems to change. As the books grew more popular, and as times changed, I was able to include more of Magnus and Alec as the series went on. In fact, their presence in the story and on the page made a big jump starting in CoFA, at which point I received a surge of criticism from those who were upset that I was writing about Magnus and Alec more prominently. I remember having my books pulled from libraries; foreign translators cut scenes with Magnus and Alec in them; once I was standing in the middle of the street about to get into a car to take me to a school where I was going to do a talk about my books when my publicist came up and said we were no longer invited: the school had read about Magnus and Alec and they didn’t want me there. Or often, if I was at a school, I’d be asked not to talk about Magnus and Alec while speaking to the students.


I tried to walk a careful line, including Magnus and Alec (and later, Aline and Helen) as significant and meaningful characters, but still managing to keep schools, libraries, and reading groups from throwing the books out or locking them up where the kids who most needed to read them wouldn’t be able to access them at all.


I held onto the hope that attitudes would continue to shift, to allow for more freedom to write characters who accurately represent the population of the world we live in (and represent my own friends and family, on whom Alec and Helen specifically are based). Hope that I’d be able to expand roles for characters like Magnus and Alec, and over the past twelve years — partly as I’ve carved out my career in a way where I can take the sales hits that sometimes result from major LGBT+ inclusion, and partly because of so many brave writers, readers, editors and publishers who’ve pushed for change — I’ve been able to do so more and more. 


When I was writing CoFA, I purposefully left a gap where Magnus and Alec go on vacation, with the idea that someday I could go back and fill in that gap with a story focused on them. For a long time that wasn’t something that companies wanted to buy and publish. I could have self-published the series, but I wanted the books on the shelves in stores, on the “bestsellers” rack with every other book I’ve written, making a statement about how much people want this kind of book and these kind of characters. I chose to write the story now when I did because Simon and Schuster, my publisher, opened Saga Press, an imprint dedicated to expanding what you can do in YA and cross-publishing with adult fantasy/sci fi. It’s Saga that will be publishing The Eldest Curses.

I thought a lot about what to say here because of two things: one, that people don’t like to hear about pushback against writing non-straight characters — it’s depressing (it is), it seems distant, unreal, how can these old systems and thought processes still exist? We’ve had successful books with gay characters in them! We’re done, right? I guess all I can say is that I think there’s a value to illuminating the pushback because it underlines how important it is to keep supporting books with LGBT+ characters because we are not there yet; we’re not where those books are give the same budgets and marketing and push as books with straight casts, and it takes the support of readers and reviewers and bookstore and library buyers to get us there.

I’d also say that I know I’ll get criticism for saying I was careful in my portrayal of Magnus and Alec until I felt like I’d gotten to a place where even if the fact that they were in love, lived together, even had sex was shown or even just implied (as it is in CoFA) it wouldn’t mean the books were locked up in libraries and slapped with warning labels. I guess I can only say it’s hard to navigate a situation where you fear the very kids who need to read about Magnus and Alec won’t be able to. When you meet kids who say “This book saved my life” so many times, and you think “But what if you couldn’t get to it? What if your school wouldn’t carry it, or your library, or your Walmart, which in small towns is sometimes literally the only source of books?) I accept that criticism. We all face hard choices in life and we make complicated decisions we think are for the best, and being criticized for those decisions is part of living and learning.

I guess the only other thing I’d say is whatever shitty things were said to me over the years about Magnus and Alec, they pale in comparison to the shitty things said to writers like Malinda Lo and Scott Tracey who were writing their own lives and experiences in the form of LGB characters on the page — and as Malinda says, their pain at confronting homophobia/biphobia will always be more visceral and personal than mine.

If you go out and buy The Lost Book of the White of course I’ll be thrilled, and a lot of that will be because it’s a way to show publishers that this kind of media and these protagonists are wanted and desired by readers. But I’d be just as thrilled if you picked up any fantasy by an LGB+ writer with LBG+ characters in it. There’s a ton of wonderful stuff and I hope you’ll explore it.

Trouble in Canada

Request: “I’m your husband, it’s my job.”

a/n: I hope you enjoy this itty bitty 10 page writing that I’ve been working on for a few days now ! 😉 ALSO @whitechocolateperfection wanted some angst so I wrote some angst and I hope y’all enjoy and I’d love to know your thoughts!!!

Your name: submit What is this?

“I’ll see you at the next session?”

            You picked your head up from rummaging in your bag and smiled at Ethan, your cooking class instructor, “My husband might be back in town, but I’ll see,”

           Ethan nodded his head steadily.  After a while of looking at each other, you diverted your gaze down towards the wooden table.  You saw his tapping fingers slowly make their way towards your hand that was rested on the table.

           Quickly, you moved your hand, and placed your engagement and wedding ring back on your left hand.  You did’t like cooking with your rings on in fear that they could fall down the drain if you were washing your hands, “Uh, Thanks for the lesson, I’ll see you later.”

           You heard an audible sigh escape his lips, “See you next week, Mrs. Mendes.” 

           As fast as you could, you scurried out the door and saw your friend, Jessie, waiting for you outside.  She saw your flustered expression and smirked, “Looks like the teacher has a crush on the student.” 

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SAKURA HARUNO: THE STRONGEST KUNOICHI!

“Cherry blossoms in spring are special, for their beauty draws a line between them and the other flowers. She, who was the name of these flowers, works strenuously in her strict training to catch up with Naruto and Sasuke, who run before her. And then the time of blooming approached - Sakura, with her polished medical ninjutsu and strong arms, shall become the beautiful cherry blossom that heals the battlefield.”

“Tsunade, Sakura’s teacher, is the Fifth Hokage that runs the village of Konoha. Sakura, who directly received the teachings from the shinobi that sits on the most prominent place of the village, lets her talent blossom very fast, together with the subtle chakra control she naturally possesses.”

“Sakura, who excelled at chakra control, had her talent for medical ninjutsu noticed by Tsunade, her teacher, early on. She received the initiation at the techniques from Tsunade at first, and also from her elder pupil Shizune, and grew to be the best medical ninja in Konoha in the twinkle of an eye. Mastering the secret forbidden technique Tsunade used, she brings her healing to a level that exceeded Shizune. Filling her chest with the firm confidence that even if everyone suffers serious wounds, she’ll make them recover, the healing cherry blossoms blooms splendidly in profusion.”

“[…]By means of her excellent self.healing ability, even if she’s injured she recovers immediately. Thanks to the acquisition of this power, Sakura became completely able to show her proud superhuman strength without fearing the enemy’s attacks in time of war.”

“Her self-healing ability shines, ranging from defence to offence…!!”

{“THE HEALING CHERRY BLOSSOM BLOSSOMS IN THE FRONT LINE▬!”}

(Databook 4 entries - end)

_______________________________

Why is Sakura Haruno the perfect heroine and the strongest Kunoichi?

↳▬ ❝Her personality:

Kishimoto-sensei describes Sakura as stubborn, well-educated and girly. At the very beginning of the series, Sakura appears to be nothing but an ordinary 12 year old, spoiled and ignorant. Sakura, who in contrast to her teammates Sasuke and Naruto, whose lives were hard and lonely, grew up with a home and parents. This soon changes, and Sakura’s personality starts to blossom. An important key moment in that transformation is during the Chunin Exams arc in the Forest of Death when she cuts off her hair, the same hair she grew long to impress Sasuke. She cuts it off and fights her very best against Sound ninjas to protect her teammates. This is an important moment for her character as it shows her resolve to change and truly shows the beginning of Sakura’s development.

Sakura is a very compassionate character, she deeply treasures the things her friends do for her. Lee is one of those said friends, who gave it his all to protect Sakura in the Forest of Death. Sakura is grateful for that, so she thanks Lee for protecting her, cheers him on in his fight against Gaara, buys a flower for him while he’s in the hospital and their friendship begins. Her compassion shines up once more when she tries to run to his side, but gets stopped by her sensei, right after Lee loses his exams fight against Gaara.

Sakura’s compassion for others and her selflessness are what shine the most in the manga. Her desire to protect her teammates and keep them both safe is what motivates her to keep going and never give up. But that goal never stopped her from helping others who were in need of her help. She fought and cared for anyone who needed her - be it Lady Chiyo, a civilian child during the attack of Pain, a civilian child during the Wave land arc, her own young daughter, or even a wounded enemy like Karin. Sakura chose to take her destiny in her own hands and shape it to the best of her abilities.

The two most important examples that showcase how selfless Sakura truly is, are for one her desire to help Naruto fulfill his dream of becoming Hokage, and her desire to safe and help the man she loves, Sasuke.

Despite what many people like to think, Sakura’s character did not suffer because of her relationship to Sasuke. Quite the opposite. Her love for him and her desire to save him from his demons help her become aware of the important things in life. Sakura matures and becomes a realist. She took her hardship and turned it into a tool for growth and self-reflection. From that point forward, she trained and gathered information to help Sasuke and Naruto.

[“She whom you came close to killing once…she feels for and sheds tears over you, even now…she only wanted to save you!”] - Chapter 693

Sakura’s willpower develops greatly, and she learns to never give up, to always get back up on her feet, even when she’s broken and bruised.

In her fight against Akatsuki member Sasori, even though she feels fear building up in her chest, it is Sasuke and Naruto who give her the strength to be brave and face her enemy head on. She is willing to die for them if she has to. And she almost did in two instances.

One, when she tried to run in between Naruto and Sasuke on the hospital rooftop and two, when she was ready to die by Sasuke’s hand if it meant she could kill him and thus save him from his darkness.

Sakura doesn’t waver. If she truly believes in something, she won’t let go of that. But she’s not someone who puts herself in front of something more important. A good example is Sasuke’s secret mission in Gaiden. Due to unfortunate circumstances, her husband leaves to protect the village and their family. To keep everyone safe and out of danger, nobody is allowed to know Sasuke’s location. Even though this mission takes a toll on Sakura’s and Sarada’s life, Sakura knows their feelings are connected and that there’s no reason for doubt. She tries to convey that truth to her only daughter, who at first does not really understand.

Sakura is a compassionate, caring and loving mother. She gives it her all to make Sarada feel loved and safe. She also appears to be a strict mother, as Sarada shows signs of good manners, a kind personality and patience.

All in all, Sakura Haruno/Uchiha stands out as a kind, loving, compassionate and strong willed character, who never dares to give up, especially when it’s her friends or family that are on the line. The passion within her to love strongly and believe in her friends gives her the strength to keep going. Because her character story revolves mostly around being there and fighting for her loved ones and village, Sakura, who always puts those in need above everything else to the point that she is ready to die for them, is no doubt the most selfless character in the series. And that selflessness is the main source of her incredible will and strength.

↳▬ ❝Her natural talent:

[“Her chakra control and intelligence however, are nothing to look down upon.” - Databook 1.]

Intelligence and Booksmarts

Sakura has been blessed in many ways. Her intelligence is part of this. Right at the start of the manga, we learn that Sakura is naturally smart and passes all her academy exams with the best possible scores. In fact, she is said to be the smartest right after Shikamaru Nara, who, as we all know, is the smartest in their generation; making Sakura even be above talented ninja like Sasuke Uchiha and Neji Hyuga, who were at the top of their classes.

Notable proof for that is the Chunin Exams arc, in which Sakura was the only one who was able to answer all questions, despite Ibiki-sensei saying those questions couldn’t be answered by mere genin and were supposed to make the kids cheat.

Her fight with Ino also tells us, that Sakura is very booksmart. She knew Ino’s special jutsu and was able to explain its function and weakness to the reader.

Furthermore, she is also able to think and decide in mere seconds if the need arises, like tricking sound ninjas during the Forest of Death fight or freeing herself from being stuck in Sasori’s poison by letting a paper bomb explode.

[“First-rate chakra control and brainpower!!”] - Databook 1

Observation and Analytical Skills

But that’s not all. Sakura is a very good observer. She’s able to observe and memorize any pattern of movement, even those of a master puppeteer like Sasori. During their fight, Sasori had noticed that Sakura could read him like a book. He acknowledged this and even somewhat praised her for her skills. Chiyo was also surprised by this and compared Sakura to Tsunade, Sakura’s master, noting that Sakura was a very good pupil. The same Chiyo later acknowledged once again, that Sakura was capable of becoming a better Kunoichi than even Tsunade.

During the failed attempt to retrieve Sasuke a second time in Part II, Sakura and her team were held back by Obito, and within minutes, Sakura was able to analyze and explain how Obito’s (then still Tobi) Kamui worked, saying he was removing parts of his body from this reality/dimension (into another).

[“She’s shown shining potential in a fairly wide array of competences. Should she develop them, she might become a threat even to the great Sasuke!”] - Databook 1

Sakura’s passion to gather as much information as she can about something she feels she has to be prepared for, is immense. A little while after Team Seven’s first failed attempt to bring Sasuke back from Orochimaru, Sakura explains that she had noticed Sasuke’s immense growth in skill, speed and more; once again showcasing her analytical skills. She then goes on to say that she had read some books and came to the conclusion that Sasuke must have been given enhanced drugs that would speed up his training.

Another example for Sakura’s analytical nature is the war arc. She gets approached by a Zetsu who had taken on the form of Neji Hyuga. She realizes it is not Neji who is standing behind her and reacts instantly when the White Zetsu tries to attack her. She punches him to the ground, causing a great deal of damage, and tells him she knew it was him. She interrogates him. Together with Yamato’s report, and an autopsy she performs on the white Zetsu, she figures out the abilities the White Zetsu uses and concludes that it must be genetical material from Hashirama Senju being used, as the Zetsu’s DNA shows similarity with Yamato’s.

All this is proof of the fact, that Sakura Haruno was rightfully called one of the smartest. Not only is she booksmart and knows a lot about rules, technical things and ninjutsu, she is also able to analyze and memorize an individual’s behavior in mere seconds, allowing herself to prepare the right strategy. It also shows that she is very capable of memorizing important things like movement and more to the point where she is able to use that information years in advance.

Genjutsu Prowess

Sakura is naturally a genjutsu type. She is able to recognize it and set herself and others free from it. During the chunin exams when Orochimaru and the Sand attacked, she (and Shikamaru) was the only one who recognized the genjutsu in time and protected herself from it. Later on she dispelled the jutsu to wake Naruto up.

Thanks to Chiyo, Sakura knows the blindspot of the Sharingan. Using Chiyo’s information, she was able to protect herself from Itachi’s eyes and help Naruto get out of the genjutsu.This gives her the ability to fight even Sharingan users. It’s proven once more in Gaiden when Sakura attacks Shin, who has Sharingan eyes all over his head, from behind his blind spot and almost kills him.

Perfect Chakra Control

But Sakura has been blessed with more than just her high intelligence and her analytical observation skills. Sakura naturally possesses amazing chakra control. In fact, she was able to control it better than anyone else in her class. She showcases this in several arcs.

Starting with the tree climbing training where she was the first one to reach the top. Kakashi notes that Sakura is not only a genjutsu type, but also possesses amazing chakra control, better than even Sasuke. Sakura manages to get through the training exercise with ease and gives Naruto a few tips, who later on gets asked by Sasuke who wanted to know what Sakura had said, as he was struggling as well.

Medical Ninjutsu

To help her teammates, Sakura took matters in her own hands and requested to be trained by the Fifth Hokage, Tsunade Senju. With the help of her perfect chakra control, it didn’t take long until Sakura’s talent for medical ninjutsu blossomed. It had only been two and a half years that had passed since Sakura came under the guidance of Tsunade. In that time frame, Sakura became famous in Konoha for her healing abilities. Mastering medical ninjutsu is extremely difficult, as one must be able to delicately control chakra as well as have extensive knowledge and perseverance.

[“And she has developed into a top medical ninja among those in the village.”] - Databook 3

In fact, by the end of the series, Sakura Haruno had become the best medic known to humankind, thus surpassing her master Tsunade and Shizune.This is thanks to her mastering the Byakugou Seal and Tsunade’s forbidden technique, Creation Rebirth, that allows her to survive any injury and attack with even more power, thus making the technique versatile to its user as it utilises both defense and offense.

Furthermore, the user is also able to transfer their chakra to another person, Sakura does this to Obito in Chapter 685. It’s only thanks to her seal and the massive amount of stored chakra that made it possible for Sakura to help Obito and give him enough chakra to keep his Kamui jutsu active.

The Byakugou Seal is said to be the pinnacle of chakra control, making it very hard to master and control. Aside from Tsunade, Sakura is the only person known who is able to use it, surpassing  Tsunade’s first apprentice, Shizune by the age of just 17.

A medical ninja is never supposed to be at the front lines, as their job it is to heal the wounded, making it their priority to stay alive under any circumstances. However, there is an exception to that rule. Those who can use the Byakugou Seal and Creation Rebirth, are allowed to break that rule and fight at the front lines. Sakura is one of them.

By the age of 17, almost four years since Sakura started to train under the guidance of Tsunade, Sakura had mastered the forbidden technique and the Summoning Jutsu, allowing her to summon the slug, Katsuyu. Together with her summon, Sakura can activate Immense Network Healing, which allows the user to heal a great number of persons simultaneously regardless of distance. While using this technique, the user is linked with Katsuyu and has a sense of what Katsuyu might be encountering on the battlefield, as the slug splits into many parts filled with the user’s chakra before scanning the battlefield for wounded shinobi.

Her summon, Katsuyu, can spit acid strong enough to melt through rocks with ease. The acid boasts such high density and concentration it dilutes even stone, vaporizing it. All things it touches will melt away. There are no setup moves to do before this jutsu’s activation. Thanks to this one can easily strike, catching the enemy unawares, which has the advantage of denying them any opportunity to dodge. Due to its physical and genetic make up, Katsuyu is extremely resistant to damage, as seen during Pain’s attack when Katsuyu absorbed people into its body to protect them. Because of its ability to divide into smaller parts, Sakura is able to summon different parts of Katsuyu anywhere at any given time should the need arise. It can also deconstruct itself entirely, until nothing more than its body fluids are left. This, however, doesn’t weaken Katsuyu at all.

With those abilities, Sakura was able to heal and save thousands of people over the course of the series. This includes people like Naruto, Sasuke, Hinata, Kakashi, Kankuro, Chiyo, a small girl, hundreds of wounded people during the Pain attack, Shikamaru, the entire Shinobi Alliance Force during the war and more.

She is also one of the best when it comes to poisons. Even though Sasori, a member of the Akatsuki, had created a poison to which not even he knew how to create an antidote for, Sakura was able to do just that without much trouble, surprising even Chiyo, who had been sure only the great Tsunade would be able to heal the boy, for Chiyo believed Tsunade was the only one who had better knowledge of poisons than Chiyo herself. Thanks to that, Sakura saved Kankuro’s life as well as her own during her battle with Sasori.

She is also able to create a poisoned Kunai and sleeping bombs.

Sakura is shown to achieve all this by the time she turned 17. Later on, as Databook 4 tells us, Sakura learns all of Shizune’s jutsu, including poison jutsu. This is why Sakura, rightfully so, surpassed her master Tsunade as a Medic nin, and became Konoha’s best known Healer.

Sakura’s strength and evasion skills

Medical Ninjutsu is not the only thing Tsunade has taught her student. Superhuman strength and evasion is what makes Sakura Haruno the best of the best. By sending her chakra straight to her fist and letting it free in the right moment, Sakura is able to destroy nearly everything.

Unlike her master, Sakura doesn’t have to waste chakra on keeping herself young, which means she has more chakra that she can utilise over Tsunade. Which is evident by the fact that Sakura’s punches cause greater damage than Tsunade’s, both with and without the Byakugou activated. This also gets confirmed by the first Hokage, Hashirama Senju, who states that Sakura’s strength could possibly be even greater than Tsunade’s. As a reminder, Tsunade was able to break through Madara’s great Susanoo.

In fact, Sakura’s crater created by her punch in chapter 632 is the biggest one in the manga we’ve seen so far.

Through her strength she was able to defeat countless juubi clones at once in the war. In Gaiden, although she had held back due to her husband needing to question the enemy first, she almost killed Shin by attacking him from behind his blind spot, destroying entire body parts and erupting several of his vital organs. She also destroyed several of Sasori’s puppets and Sasori himself. She killed Pain’s summon with a single punch, saving a little girl in the process.

During the Sealing of Kaguya, Sakura managed something not even Sasuke or Naruto were able to do, attacking Kaguya from above and punching her with such a force that half of her horn broke off. Thanks to chakra enhanced strength, Sakura is able to keep enemies away from her, while still causing damage to them by destroying the ground underneath their feet.

However, Sakura also possesses natural strength. During her fight with Chiyo against Sasori, she lifted a boulder off Chiyo with ease.

[“That beauty and strength… it would seem as though you’ve raised another Tsunade, no?“] - Jiraiya about Sakura

To become a medic, one absolutely must learn the art of evasion.  Sakura was specifically trained in this by her master, Tsunade, who went all out on her pupil during their training. By the time Sakura was fighting Sasori, she had advanced and mastered evasion to the point where she didn’t need Chiyo’s help anymore and was able to evade Sasori’s weapons on her own.

During that fight we also learn that had Tsunade stated that evasion is the most important skill for a medic. Sakura would also learn to fight, for she was the Fifth Hokage’s apprentice and would inherit the power of a true Sannin.

A Leader

To become a Jonin, one must possess the quality to lead others with confidence and competence. Sakura proved herself worthy in several instances.

  • Sakura shows her leadership skills when she instructed the Sand Medic-nins on what to do and bring so she could create an antidote for Sasori’s poison. She later lead the operation on Kankuro.
  • Another display of this is when she took the lead during Pain’s attack and instructed Konoha-nin to evacuate the place seconds after being told how serious and dangerous the situation had become.
  • Furthermore, she motivated the entire Shinobi Alliance Force to not give up and keep fighting, to die fighting rather than die doing nothing.

This is why she rightfully became one of the three Jonin in her generation at age 18/19, together with Shikamaru Nara and Neji Hyuga (who had been promoted before them).

Without Sakura…..:

  • Naruto would have died not once or twice, but three times or possibly even more.
  • Sasuke would have bled to death
  • Hinata would have died
  • Kankuro would have died
  • Hundreds of villagers would have died during Pain’s invasion
  • A large portion of the Shinobi Alliance Force would have died
  • Karin would have died
  • Sasori would still be alive and Gaara would most likely be dead
  • Gaara would have killed Sasuke
  • Sasuke would have been consumed by the curse seal in Forest of Death
  • Sasuke would have no family
  • it would have taken much longer to find out that Zetsu clones had Hashirama’s DNA

More important Databook quotes

[“No matter how many times she’s hurt, she gets up. The unbreakable girl who grows every day.”] - Databook 2

[“ But her strength is her ability to find hope despite odds. With the pride of being a ninja deep in her heart she does not wither but faces all challenges. ”] - Databook 2

[“  In the battle field she was unnoticeable, but she is endlessly heading towards becoming the greatest of female ninjas. ”] - Databook 2

[“ One can see her strong spirit during missions. She erases fears of the opponent, doesn’t back down, and bravely and boldly fights back.  ”] - Databook 2

[“ What moves Sakura is her strong belief in becoming the greatest of female ninjas. She suppresses her fear which is about to explode and fights. Is this not true courage?  ”] - Databook 2

[“ What moves Sakura is her strong belief in becoming the greatest of female ninjas. She suppresses her fear which is about to explode and fights. Is this not true courage?  ”] - Databook 2

You want to know why Sakura is the heroine and the strongest Kunoichi?

You now know why.

-Sasukekun

PS: Special thanks to @xinpaii and @amitds who’ve helped me a lot with this post!

Malec Fanfic Rec!

Malec writing goodies from amazing writers.These are some golden works

4 times Alec almost said I love you, and the one time that he actually did by sufferingbisexual

Alec realized he was in love with Magnus. However when will he be able to actually tell him.

Across the Hall by clato27

“'She looks just like your wife,’ Magnus said, offhandedly. His gaze tore back to Alec when he heard the other man choke on the coffee he was drinking. ‘Oh, I’m sorry, are you two not married.’ 'Uh, no,’ Alec said after recovering from his coughing fit. 'Izzy is my sister.'”

Aka, the “I fell in love with the pregnant girl across the hall’s brother” AU.

Addicted To You by @imawriteriwrite

Magnus Bane’s the head of his own company. Alec Lightwood is in his last year of law school. They’ve never met but have one thing in common: neither does relationships. Just one night stands. That is until they find themselves matched on a hookup app and suddenly one night is not enough.

Also known as the one where Magnus and Alec meet and think they can have no strings attached sex and not develop feelings.

Alecs Husband by NotEvenThat

Max misses Alec and finally demands that he go with Alec and his friend.. Even if Mom says no.

Amor Aeternus by @lolguess

In a world where the Clave encourages soulbonding you would think Magnus and Alec have it easy.

And Then I Met You by @everydayfandom

Sometimes someone comes along and throws you of your life path. And sometimes that’s not such a bad thing.

Bibliophile by @dorkberto

Despite what his sister thinks about his non-existent love life, Alec is not in danger of an oncoming descent into recluse crazy cat owner. For one; Church would eat his competitors for Alec’s undivided attention and two; Alec’s a little hung up over Magnus Bane.

Blue storm by @dorkberto

Ragnor was gone.

Ragnor was gone

Bright Lights, Small Town by @lecrit

When Magnus gets to Nashville, Indiana to handle his late mother’s will, he doesn’t expect to be forced to stay there for six months. Six months away from New York and lost in the wildness of the countryside.

It quickly appears that he is going to go through six months of living hell.

The fact that he hates the local veterinarian on sight isn’t helping.

Broken Arrows by @gibberish10

Over his parabatai’s missing, Alec lashes out at everyone, including Magnus Bane, his warlock lover.

Come Undone by @gibberish10

No one has asked him how he felt, but Alec did.

Complete Me by Maleciseverything

“What one loves in childhood stays in the heart forever.” -Mary Jo Putney

Drop It Like It’s Hot by @janoda

Alec tries to deal with people behaving differently since the wedding. He hadn’t counted on Dylan from Accounting.

Fusion by prfctdaze

Magnus gets the surprise of his life when he walks in to Jade Wolf.

Happy Birthday, Beautiful by @themagnusbane

The thing about having lived for centuries is that birthdays are no longer such a big deal. A pity no one told that to Magnus Bane’s party extraordinaire boyfriend: Alec Lightwood.

Hold me tightly by Tchell1

“I thought you had died, Alexander” Magnus finally said as a way of explaining himself “I saw you die”

Hypnotise by highlytrainedfangirl

Alec had a problem. One that was wrapped up in exquisite clothing and dusted in glitter. Alec was quickly realising that being around Magnus was terrible for his composure. Ignoring the fact that he could barely string a sentence together without tripping over his words, he’d discovered a new distraction: magic.

I found God but it wasn’t supposed to be by @intangibel

After closing a particularly spectacular legal case Magnus sends Ragnor a celebratory text only to find himself the victim of autocorrect and having to explain to a very handsome angel (Alec) that he isn’t God, no matter how much he wishes he was right now.

In The Cards by Obssesivecompulsivereadr

Magnus wore cardigans and baggy slacks. He owned two cats, and he lived in a home more suitable for an elderly mundane woman for a reason. He was to remain boring and unsuitable for most associations with people. He did not like attention, no matter how positive it might be. He was to seem eccentric and weird. Living a life focused on magic that was supposed to not exist.

Into You by @darrenchristsupastar

Alec has more layers than we may have previously thought

It’s Time To Lose Your Virginity, Brother Dearest by @themagnusbane

Magnus Bane is a famous stripper, used to pretty boys falling in love with him after one dance. The feeling is hardly ever mutual. But when he meets the freshly turned twenty-one year old Alec lightwood, he can’t take his eyes off him, and they find themselves in love quicker than they expected.

Looking at him by @jainsel-and-the-ships

Alec Lightwood is in love with his best friend and colleague Jace.
Jace is straight and at the moment he’s dating this Clary girl. Alec is certain it won’t last, as all his friend’s previous relationships.
Then there’s Magnus Bane, another co-worker and a man who sure knows how to make Alec feel embarrassed.
Something’s going on between Alec and Magnus.
Something’s going on between Jace and Clary too…

Magic and Rum by NotEvenThat

Shortly after the party, Magnus finds Max in the kitchen.

Make a home out of you by @thealmostrhetoricalquestion

“There is a delicate system in place and you are destroying it, Alexander Lightwood. Unhand my pants.”

“Now there’s a sentence I never thought I’d hear you say. You’re usually encouraging me to put my hands on your pants.”

Morning hair by @lollylokoala

While Magnus was completely aware of the effect Alec had on him, he didn’t know that a tiny little detail in Alec’s morning look could make his heart skipped a beat.

My Heart Smiles by pseudofoucault333 

Magnus is an interior designer who is dreading going to his yearly Christmas party and Alec a waiter who has dealt with more than enough Christmas cheer to last a lifetime. But when the two set eyes on the other across a crowded restaurant are they going to be destined for more when the festive season is over?

My True Love Gave To Me by @imawriteriwrite

Magnus Bane had a plan, a perfect Christmas Eve just like always. Hang out with his friends, bask in the Christmas Spirit. Then everything went wrong.

Now he’s stuck reliving the same day again and again and again. The bright side? Maybe Alec Lightwood isn’t as terrible as Magnus always thought.

Never Stand Between Two Mirrors by @oncethrown

Alec has enough on his plate right now. His parents are furious at him, Magnus Bane is making him feel things he’s trying so hard not to feel, his wedding is coming up, and his world is breaking apart.What he doesn’t need is a fussy mundane version on himself showing up in the Institute basement. What he doesn’t need is Magnus telling him that they’ll just have to wait for Seelie Magic to suck that version of himself back to his own dimension.But since when does Alec get what he needs?

Alternate Dimension Alec gets trapped in the Shadowhunter reality at some point after the “I know you feel what I feel” scene. The gang desperately tries to stop chaos from ensuing. 

Nothing But A Distraction by @actuallyredorchid

Clary doesn’t sneak away when Alec’s on the phone, so Alec accepts Magnus’ invitation to “go out for a drink”.

Off to a bad start by @fangtasticsaphael

“How did you manage to never run into him? He’s always helping with stuff and he’s even been at the institute about three weeks ago to strengthen the wards against further attacks from Valentine,” she replied and looked at her brother incredulously. Alexander scrunched up his nose and shrugged.

“Well, maybe I have better things to do than waiting around to watch some overrated warlock do magic tricks,” he commented a little defensively but it was the truth. He always had something to do and even when they were not out demon hunting, he had either paperwork to do or train.

“Pardon me, but I’m not just some overrated warlock. I’m the High Warlock of Brooklyn and that title is well deserved, if I may say so. And I’m appalled that you refer to my magic as petty tricks. You Nephilim always act to high and mighty, yet you’re constantly in need of some tricks from overrated warlocks to help you out of some unnecessary dilemma,” a foreign voice interjected and Alec whirled around, fingers instinctively curling around his bow to be ready to attack if need be. The owner of the voice was not what Alexander had expected, to be honest.

Oh lover, hold on by @fireblazie

The mask and goggles clatter to the ground. Isabelle makes a choked noise, and Jace whispers, paper-thin, “Alec?”

Magnus stops breathing as Alec’s gaze—cold, dead, and empty—comes to rest impassively on them.

“Who the hell is Alec?”

(Loosely based on Captain America: The Winter Soldier.)

One Show Only by KouriArashi

It’s hard to stay in the closet when the guy you had a one-night stand with two nights ago turns out to be your new partner … but Alec will be damned if he isn’t going to give it a try.

People say crazy things by @ohlafraise

“But what I don’t get is why Magnus cares so much about a random shadowhunter,” Jocelyn said.

Simon winced. “Oh, boy.”

Pick up lines by Gracefanfics

Admittly maybe using pick up lines in the middle of your brother’s rune party was a bad idea.

Or 
A short fic about Alec not having great timing in using pick up lines on Magnus.

Shooting Pool by @malec-is-pretty

Magnus and Alec go on their date and a simple game of pool gets them a little wound up.

Somewhere safe to finally break by onefootintheboilinghotlava

With the war finally over, Magnus had time to be alone and his mind decided to bring up all the things and people he had lost in the war at once. At his own loft, with his two beloved cats sleeping soundly, Magnus broke down……

Tampons and Concealer? By onefootintheboilinghotlava

So Izzy sent Alec to get tampons and concealer…Alec was standing in the drugstore, not even sure where to begin, when a handsome stranger offered to help.

That’s your cue by @theleftboobgrabber

“Keep your hands to yourself,” Alec tells Magnus apropos of nothing.

Magnus frowns. “I’m on the other side of the table!” he protests… not that he wasn’t thinking about some light groping per say, but they’re in public, Alec might not be into it and, while he’s good at concealing it, Magnus does have manners. Sometimes.

My take on Magnus and Alec’s date.

The Choices of the Chosen by KouriArashi

The day after his 21st birthday, Alec is sent to the demonic court as a gladiator, where he makes both friends and enemies … along with meeting Magnus Bane, who doesn’t seem to fit in either category.

The Only Magic I Believe In (Is The Magic I Receive From Loving You) by @delilahbelle

Or, four gifts Alec gives Magnus.

“No one’s ever done anything like that for me before.”

Alec’s face softens. “Well, I’m going to do it for as long as I’m alive. So get used to it.”

The Second Kiss by @simonseroticfriendfiction

“So here we are.” Magnus said, taking a step closer to Alec.

Alec gulped and took a deep breath in through his nose. “Yeah, here we are.” He squeezed his fingers nervously in his fists as he caught Magnus glancing towards his lips. “I-I suppose you want me to kiss you?” He stuttered, voice faltering.

This Christmas (You’re Someone Special) by vulturemonem 

Last Christmas, Magnus Bane had his heart broken.

Again, and again, and again.

And he didn’t think it would be mended anytime soon. He certainly didn’t think he’d be ready to let anybody in. Until a beautiful boy walks into his shop, and steals his breath with shy glances, kind words, and a fantastic coffee machine.

Maybe this Christmas will be better.

Or: In which Camille is awful, Ragnor and Raphael are an old married couple, and Magnus can’t help but be enamoured by Alec Lightwood.

This Night Is Not Forever by @isabellebiwoods

Alec Lightwood is a happily settled down man in a loving, caring relationship. But things weren’t always that way… and once upon a time, Alec used his Valentine’s Day to celebrate the spirit of the night as much as possible.

aka. world inverted legendary lothario alec lightwood

Too Much is Never Enough by Obsessivecompulsivereadr

They are on opposite edges of the same ideal. Alec so young, and Magnus so much older. Alec a blessed acolyte of the Angel, Raziel. Magnus the abandoned son of the Greater Demon, Asmodeus. Magnus with so much more unimportant and irrelevant experience, and Alec with none. They could not be more different if they tried, and yet, they are also the same. A matched set of uncertainty and inability to accept that someone might want them for exactly who they are.

Top Three by @nebulein

So.” Alec flops back onto the bed, sprawled in a lazy heap on his back, sated and boneless. Magnus is already lying on his belly, basking in the afterglow, and he surreptitiously steals closer, burrowing against Alec’s side. “Best sex of my life.”

Magnus hums, resting his head on his arms, revelling in the thrill those words send through him.

“Or, well,” Alec hazardously waves an arm around, “easily in the top three.”

Magnus giggles. He has no idea where that came from. It’s uncharacteristic for him. Magnus Bane, High Warlock of Brooklyn is usually much too dignified to giggle. But then Alec turns his head and grins at Magnus, lopsided and loopy but brilliant, oh so brilliant, warming Magnus from the inside out and maybe this is exactly the kind of situation which calls for a giggle, so Magnus will allow it. Just this once.

“How about you?”

Twenty-One-Year-Old Alec Lightwood by Obsessivecompulsivereadr

Alec tries not to want Magnus, but it goes about as well as all those other things Alec’s tried not to want throughout the years. Which is… badly

Warm In Your Light by @actuallyredorchid

It’s far too easy, letting himself be swept away.

(S02E07 missing scene)

We must choose to reach out and touch by Ambros

Magnus holds out his hand, a silver chain running around his middle finger and wrist, and Alec doesn’t have the time to process it – to think, doesn’t have the time to realise what’s going to happen because he has to take it and he does, electricity dancing through their fingers and down his back and he tries not to think about it, holds out his own hand for Jace and feels unbalanced; he knows Jace’s touch, remembers it from roughing each other up when they were kids even though he tried to forget it, to turn it into a ghost when he understood, but Magnus’ is new and smooth and unassuming and he feels uncomfortable, doesn’t know what to do with it.

Who Ya Gonna Call? By @menckenschrestomethy

“You have to—“

“Help you?” Magnus filled in dryly.

Or: The Six Times Magnus helped someone, and the one time they try to help him

Will you be my best friend? Will you be my last? by @lightwoodlesbians

or the 'you pretended to be my partner bc my ex wouldn’t stop talking to me’ au

You Are Certainly My Poison of Choice by iktwabrokenbone

So there he was. Midnight, at a party. Preparing himself to do something with a guy. To spend one night getting all of this- this unspeakable desire out of his system. He needed to forget it before he made a mistake and ruined his career, his chances of becoming Head of the New York Institute.
 

(Alec’s panic attacks were getting worse and worse and maybe if he spent one night with a guy he could get it out of his system, and he could forget being gay and loving Jace. But nothing went that smoothly, so of course Alec’s one night stand had to be Magnus Bane, and they had to keep bumping into each other. It wasn’t like Alec wanted to understand his emotions, anyway.)

For more Malec Fanfics

Olivia Puckett as Zoe Murphy

Here, I’m gonna analyze and describe Olivia Puckett’s performance as Zoe Murphy, and the ways in which it differed from Laura Dreyfuss’s. Enjoy!

First of all, Olivia Puckett is a blessing to us all. I love her so much (have you seen her Instagram stories?!) you all have no idea. She was so sweet, so good.

I’ll start from the beginning. Instantly, right as she entered during “Anybody Have a Map” her differences with Laura Dreyfuss were evident. She slouched in her chair, her foot giggling under the table. Also, with Connor, her dialogue was lighter, in a way. She delivered the “He’s definitely high” line almost jokingly, like she was just this younger sister poking fun at her brother. It wasn’t disapproving and harsh the way Laura’s delivery felt.

Even while they were exchanging “Fuck you’s!” they seemed more like siblings messing around than two extremely damaged teenagers taking out their anger on each other. It honestly felt like a normal sibling relationship. She wasn’t even yelling, and neither was Mike Faist. It wasn’t mean or anything. It was. Good.

Even when she marched off the stage, proclaiming that she’d leave without Connor if he doesn’t spead up, I felt as though she wouldn’t leave without him. Like that was yet another joke. No big deal. Like she’d wait in the driveway for him to come, and maybe give him a bit of a hard time about it all later, but that they’d laugh about it next week or something.

Then, she met Evan. She rushed over to him in the middle of WTAW, and he instantly recoiled, his shoulders turning inwards, his eyes on the ground, his hands twitching. She seemed genuinely concerned. Her voice was low, and she seemed to purposefully stay away from him, almost fearful of scaring him, while simultaneously wanting to be closer.

When she called Connor “a psychopath,” it sounded like she was angry with Connor for pushing Evan, who obviously didn’t deserve anything, but wasn’t disgusted or hateful. She didn’t sound like she hated Connor. Or even really disliked him. Just has a stereotypical teenage sibling relationship that’s a bit edgy.

When she walked away– “Okay…Jose…” –she turned around and looked back at Evan before leaving, almost fondly. It almost gave me the impression that this crush was requited, and perhaps had been for some time. That Evan’s love for Zoe wasn’t one-sided, that Zoe didn’t grow into liking Evan throughout the musical, but actually, in fact, liked him before it even began.

She entered, again, before “For Forever” and I could see a physical change that occurred in her during the 10 minutes or so she was off-stage. I could almost see her lose Connor, in that entrance. As she noticed Evan’s presence, she didn’t ask “Why is he here” like “Why is this weird kid in our house” but more like “Why is Evan, who I talked to in the hallway a few days ago, here?

Throughout the dinner before “For Forever,” she did this leg jiggle again. Which was. So fascinating. She had these particular ticks, ones which almost mirrored Evan’s. They seemed like two pieces of the same pie, in their own peculiar way. Simply, if Olivia Puckett announces one day that Zoe Murphy has a minor anxiety disorder, I would believe her in a heartbeat.

When she retorted about good times with Connor, saying that “There were no good times!” she didn’t sound like a possibly abused sibling. She sounded almost angry with herself, as though she was wondering why she didn’t notice something was wrong with Connor, as though she wished she’d tried harder. She didn’t sound like someone who was wronged and was furious, she sounded like someone who was remembering her entire childhood and trying to pinpoint where everything went wrong.

Laura’s Zoe seemed like a young person who suddenly lost control over seemingly everything in her life, someone who was almost drowning. Olivia’s Zoe seemed like a young person who had just temporarily misplaced control, someone who was floating just above the water’s surface.

During “Requiem,” Olivia cried, actually cried, which is something Laura definitely did not do. 

The whole “You were not the monster that I knew” thing was much less believable. But the “You’ve given me my brother back. Thank you.” thing at the end of “You Will Be Found” was so. much. more. believable.

I really felt for Olivia’s Zoe. “Requiem” was when I started crying fully during this performance, rather than during “You Will Be Found” (which normally what gets me). I felt her loss so deeply and profoundly, like she was taking the whole audience on this journey with her.

She truly seemed to mourn Connor, to have loved her brother. She seemed so devastated during “If I Could Tell Her” that she never got to tell Connor what she thought. 

It was just a different kind of loss.

As well, her relationship with Evan was so vastly different. She seemed to be more interested in him specifically and less interested in his connection with her brother. At the end of “You Will Be Found” when she kissed Evan the second time, she kept a hand on his when he pulled away. When he kissed her back, she wrapped her arms around him and like hug-kissed him. In the boot, with Laura Dreyfuss, Evan leaned Zoe into her back on the bed. 

The opposite happened here, with Zoe really taking control of their kissing, pushing Evan into the bed.

Also, during “Only Us” she put a hand on either side of Evan’s face and held him so softly when she sang “We can’t compete with all that” rather than motioning with one hand (see: Laura and Ben’s performance of “Only Us” on Seth Meyers). There was a part where she sat on Evan’s bed and Evan kneeled before her, and she held both of his hands between hers.

They held hands whenever they were together after that, honestly. During “Only Us,” Zoe normally kisses Evan once, at the very end of the song. Here, Olivia kissed Ben three (3) times. Twice while singing and once at the end of the song.

I cannot over-exaggerate the softness in her eyes when she looked at him. In all honestly, y’all, I felt myself really loving their relationship, which isn’t something I did beforehand. 

With Laura’s Zoe, I never would recommend Zoe and Evan being together for their own health. With Olivia’s Zoe, if they had met under different circumstances, if Evan hadn’t lied, I firmly believe that they could’ve had a healthy and happy relationship.

And the kegger skit!!! OMG!! She did the same dorky voice that Evan did with “til your mom gets home” when she said “in three hours!!” and they laughed. They laughed a lot.

It was so interesting to see almost Ben’s reactions as an actor to what Olivia was giving him. This was only the second time they’d ever done the show together in those characters, and it must’ve been so unusual to what he had been doing for the past hundred or so performances.

Zoe was so sweet? And? So strong? And never once mean to Evan? With Olivia, the whole “you don’t have to keep saying sorry….I was a little impressed, you ruined it” thing wasn’t as weird? It didn’t feel uncomfortable. It felt like: Zoe liked soft Evan, who apologizes all the time, she just wanted him to be comfortable enough around her to not feel like he had to apologize, rather than wanting him to change.

She felt like a young girl, who had suffered an immense loss, who was coping as best as she possibly could. She wasn’t some semi-popular girl who Evan liked purely because he thought she was hot (neither, of course, is Laura’s Zoe, or any form of Zoe, in fact). She was a multi-dimensional person who existed in her own right outside of anyone else. There was no room to see her as anyone else.

When she found out about Evan’s lie, it was almost more devastating. 

I would have believed her if she had said she loved Evan. 

Laura’s Zoe was angry and possibly depressed. She was desperate to grab a hold onto anything in her life, her life which was quickly spiraling out of control before her eyes. There, Evan seemed like the perfect person to grab onto, someone that was malleable and almost willing to be controlled.

Olivia’s Zoe felt in-control, like she knew what she was doing and knew where she would be in ten years, she just wasn’t there quite yet.

She obviously loved Connor and was mourning his death, but there didn’t seem to be as much guilt involved.

In her final scene, where she met Evan at the orchard, she, like Evan, seemed to have also gone through a metamorphosis. She seemed to have grown so much, and she held her head higher, too, just like Evan. To me, Zoe is a lead character, sharing the female lead title with Heidi Hansen, rather than a supporting character.

I love Laura Dreyfuss with my entire heart and soul, and her Zoe was a very particular character as well. It’s hard to pinpoint the exact differences between her Zoe and Olivia’s Zoe, because they are both truly incredible. Both woman are powerhouses of whom I will forever be in awe. Both portrayals make Zoe a fascinating, dynamic, complex, female character, one that is much, much more than a love interest or plot point. She, in some aspects, feels like the beating heart of the show. It’s hard to put my connection with her into words.

Again, like I said with Michael Lee Brown’s Jared vs. Will Roland’s Jared, neither performance was better. Both are heart-wrenching and powerful and conveyed a message to the audience, reached out and grabbed our hearts in their hands. Both are incredible. Just very, very different.

Essentially, Olivia Puckett’s performance was incredible. Unbelievable actually. Any desire to not want to see the understudies is pointless and wrong, let me tell you. This entire cast and entire crew are the most talented people I’ve ever seen.

I want to talk about this whole “punching nazis” thing, which I have been thinking about for some days.

To start, let me clarify that I have no moral or ethical qualms with Richard Spencer getting punched in the face on tv. I’d be happy to see it happen again.

But I do have a couple issues with much of the dialogue that has emerged in the wake of this event.

A lot of the people suddenly talking about nazis right now are people who didn’t seem to even realize they existed in this country prior to this election.

A lot of people seem to have gotten some strange ideas about how and where nazis are typically encountered, or who they actually are.

So, I’d like to talk about some of the times in my life when I’ve encountered nazis.

Before I do that, let’s try to establish a definition. There are a lot of different stripes of fascists and white supremacists out there, with varying agendas and varying degrees of organization. In the US we’ve got many types, ranging from the KKK and Aryan Nation to various unorganized skinhead rabble to the newish group calling itself the Alt Right. It seems easiest, at least for the sake of this argument, to lump those all together under one general “nazi” category. But does that really make sense? I’ll come back to that. But for now, in most of the examples I will describe below, these were people who openly called themselves such.

Also, I want to establish a bit about who I am. I don’t like to discuss any of these things publicly, but I also feel like I kind of have to, to explain where I am coming from. So: I am Jewish, I am bi, I am neurodivergent. Due to this last thing, I have certain issues navigating the physical world. I am physically fit but not athletic. I have very little self defense training. By occupation I am a musician.

And lastly I want to point out that these examples are from 15-20 years ago and describe some of my earliest encounters with these forces to provide context. And I’m going to start with some clear cut cases:

I first became aware of the existence of modern nazis my first year in high school. This was in the suburbs of San Francisco. I had a few friends who were into punk music and culture. I heard about “white power punks” and nazi skinheads who would sometimes show up at shows. When I started going out I would see them every once in a while. When I started going up to the city, at that time there were places that were absolutely notorious for nazi skinheads. I never interacted with them, I always steered clear of them, and never really fell in with the punk scene anyway. But that’s when I first became aware that there were people in modern America who called themselves nazis and directly advocated for white supremacy.

To be honest I did not think of myself as their “target” because (in my mind, at that time) Jewish culture in the SF Bay Area was practically invisible and unlikely to be on their radar. In fact I didn’t think too deeply about who their target was. I mostly thought they were crazy people who loved violence and called themselves “nazis” because it was the meanest thing they could think of, that they were in favor of “white power” because it was so obviously wrong. At this time, there was fair amount of tension in the state around the issue of immigration from Mexico. But it did not occur to me then that there could have been any relationship between the xenophobia I saw expressed by mainstream circles in conversations about Proposition 187 and the blatant, violent white supremacy expressed by the skinheads on the periphery of local punk scenes. (also please note that I am aware that not all skinheads are nazis and that there is an anti-racist element within skinhead culture as well)

In college, in Pittsburgh, I lived on a store with a convenience store on one end. One of the people who worked in this store was a skinhead who wore a jacket covered in various white power/“rock against communism” band logos. He had a group of similar buddies that often hung around nearby, a couple of whom had aryan nation tattoos. On several occasions when I woke up in the morning I would find leaflets distributed up and down the block decrying the Holocaust as a “Jewish scam to make money”. These flyers were attributed to Church of the Creator, one of the more active neo-nazi groups in Pennsylvania at that time. Every once in a while I would cautiously engage in arguments with some people on the fringes of that crew of guys who hung out in the area. Things were sometimes tense but never got physical. Soon after 9/11 most of them disappeared. I don’t know why or where to.

While traveling alone in Slovenia, I nearly ran into a parade of about 40 skinheads chanting and marching in the street while I was on the way back to where I was staying. I do not know what specific group they were affiliated with but wore patches with the common “celtic cross” symbol used by far right/white nationalist groups all over the world. At that time, fascist graffiti covered Ljubljana.

Those are just a few of the more blatant examples from that time. These experiences were not rare. The KKK and various neo-nazi groups held public parades and rallies all throughout this period, and sometimes showed up as counter protestors or forces of violence at protests for progressive causes. They marched through downtown Pittsburgh - with the local government’s blessing - and many other cities in that region.

There were protestors at those marches, and there were people who fought the nazis directly, but the general consensus in mainstream liberal circles at that time seemed to be that nazis had the right to march just like anyone else, that any violence against them would be bad. It certainly wasn’t at all common to hear college educated, NY Times-reading liberals talking about the glories of “punching nazis”. This is a problematic but very complicated phenomenon: they were to be tolerated up until the point at which they’ve come into power.

But let me explain why _I_ didn’t go around punching the nazis I saw, during those times when I encountered them personally. To some extent, part of me did follow that logic mentioned above, but that’s not the real reason. The real reason is pretty simple: most nazis are a lot better at fighting than I am, they do it more frequently, they usually travel in numbers, they are often armed, and in almost every circumstance when I’ve encountered them the odds would not have been remotely in my favor had things gotten physical.

Richard Spencer was alone and unarmed standing in front of a video camera busily talking about an internet meme while he was sucker punched. This occurred in broad daylight in a very crowded, open area with a ton of media and police present. While I applaud the anonymous puncher for seizing upon that opportunity, that’s not really a typical situation in which one encounters nazis.

Recently, Richard Spencer posted a video in reaction to this incident. In this video he mentions that the Alt Right will not succeed if they are unable to be who they are in public. I’ve seen a lot of people pointing to this video as a sign of victory over the Alt Right, a sign that they are scared. I think the latter half is true but not the former. What Spencer is saying is that they are going to ramp up security. And I would anticipate that these people will begin to receive even more protection from the current administration.

So, this is one conclusion I’d like to leave here - in most cases “punching nazis” means getting involved in serious physical violence in which your life will be at risk. And that risk is only going to increase in the future. Fantasizing about punching some idiot talking about a frog on tv is fun, but I think it ignores the realities that many have faced and many more are about to face. And while many of us have disabilities that hinder us in this department, I think it would behoove anyone who is serious about getting physical with fascists to study and learn how to do so before getting involved in a situation you are unprepared for. I would also think long and hard before making that demand of anyone else. But that’s not the most important point.

I’d like to circle back to talking about definitions. The examples I gave above are obvious. These were people who, in almost all cases, were openly wearing the actual logos of white supremacist organizations. So let me bring up a different example:

About one year after 9/11 I was in Budapest, taking an overnight train to Amsterdam. I had a spot in a sleeper compartment on a train. I got on and a couple other passengers came in. One of them was a young guy, a little older than me (I was in my early 20’s at this time). He spoke English very well and we got to talking. It turned out he was an Austrian who worked in finance. Middle management at a major bank. He bought us a couple of beers and we were getting along. Inevitably, the topic of 9/11 came up. Seemingly out of nowhere, he explains to me how “there were no Jews in the building that day”. He then goes on to explain how 9/11 and the entire War on Terror that was then unfolding was all a Jewish plot to direct money to Israel’s armed forces. And hinted that the Holocaust was a similar plot. I tried to argue with him for a bit (without letting on that I was Jewish) but it was nearly impossible to get through to him, and he soon became surly and then passed out. I tried to do the same. But what caught my attention was that this man was well spoken, dressed conservatively, he looked every bit the upper middle class finance professional. It was difficult to imagine him in a street fight. No one would have described this person as being on the fringes of his society.

Up until a year ago, if I told this story to a European, or to an American person of color, they were unsurprised. But if I told it to a white American their reaction would usually be “yeah, well, that’s Europe for you”.

But that’s never been the case.

One common narrative is that many of the groups of fascists have figured out that they aren’t going to get very far if they are seen just thugs who march around on the street wearing in leather jackets getting in scraps. many of them have figured this out some time ago, and have been infiltrating mainstream education and corporate life. And yes, that is happening.

But there is a big problem with that narrative: it ignores the fact that many of America’s institutions and businesses are, themselves, organizations that promote white supremacy. Many of our banks, many of our police departments, our prison system, much of our media. Does these mean they are all “nazis”? Not really. But what it does mean is that white supremacy is not some outside force that just suddenly popped out of Steve Bannon’s suitcase. It’s been here for a long time. It is deeply engrained in our society. Fascism is not some new danger that we suddenly need to prevent from being “normalized” - for much of America, fascism has been the norm for a very long time.

Here’s my point with all of this: sooner or later, Trump will be defeated. This regime is monstrous, but I have seen the power and anger and sheer volume of opposition to it, and I do not think that this regime will last. My worry is, once this most obvious of enemies is defeated, the liberal establishment will go right back to completely forgetting that white supremacy and fascism are a major problem in this country. The sad fact is, even when Democrats in power, even when the POTUS is the most progressive sounding person electable, the nazis are still here, white supremacy is still here, fascism is still here. And not always on “the other side”. We need to remember that, we need to keep pointing to them and ostracizing them and speaking out against white supremacy and fascism even when it looks like things are more comfortable, because that comfort is a trap.

been reading a lot of klance fics lately so i thought i’d share it w you guys!! here’s 14 of them and definitely my favorites. comes with the title (duh), description, a review by yours truly, and link to the fic. the writers of said fics also have some gorg other masterpieces so be sure to check those out!

1. ) Smile for the Stars by maIikcutie

description

Though he’s been dealt many bad cards, Lance isn’t sure he can handle this one: winding up stranded, a million lightyears away from home, with only Keith to keep him company.
The universe is cruel.

review

amazing a+++ fic but i strongly advise not to read this unless you are willing to live the rest of your life broken hearted and Sad. i promise ur heart will be wrecked but in the best way possible!!! a buncha artists on tumblr made art for this so be sure to check those out & also there’s a epilogue-ish thing for this that dulls the pain a lil less and its called The Stars Smile Back in case yall were interested

2. ) Dirty Laundry by Gibslythe

description:

“Two whole months of free laundry in exchange for two weeks of being my fake boyfriend. Deal?”
Keith hesitated for a moment. Was this really worth it? Hardly. Lance was an asshole, and he wasn’t sure what fake dating would entail. But, free laundry was free laundry, right?
“Alright, it’s a deal.”
Or: Lance makes the mistake of telling his Mom he has a boyfriend coming home with him for Christmas. Keith makes the mistake of agreeing to be Lance’s ‘fake boyfriend’.

review:

if u love slow burn then BOY ur gonna love this !!!! mama lance is so warm i luv her !!! fake dating aka one of my fav tropes so 11/10 and i just rly love this ok im in tears

3. ) call me, beep me by safra

description:

(00:31) Do you think she gave me the wrong number on purpose?
(00:31) Or was it a genuine mistake?
(00:32) Like maybe she writes funny and I misread it?
(00:32) Some of the numbers do look a little dodgy…
(00:33) Cause, you know, her threes couldvery easily be poorly formed eights? And maybe she writes her sevens like her ones?
(00:45) What
(00:46) The
(00:46) Fuck??
(00:47) Oh good, you are awake!
where lance messages the wrong number and things kind of snowball from there

review:

i love through-chat fics therefore i am so in love with this!!!!!! your everyday "wrong number” trope but so so so much better!!! cute and happy

4. ) Seasons by fairietailed

description: 

“Do you think we’ll be together, still, by the time we make it home?”
Lance is quiet for a moment, thinking. Then he says, “That depends. Do you plan on going somewhere?”
Keith laughs, threading his fingers through Lance’s hair.
“No, I suppose I don’t.”

review:

their relationship is just SO PURE AND SOFT and so well written i’m in luuuv but the open ending will shatter and will most likely rip u apart

5. )  Don’t Break Connection, Baby by princedeadend

description:

Keith works part-time as a phone sex operator and receives a prank call from Lance. This does not go as planned for Lance. Thus begins the adventure of our dear sweet idiot continuing to call Keith to fuck with him (but not like fuck fuck with him…at least not yet). And y'know, eventually having legit conversations with him and getting attached and growing on Keith.
aka the phone sex operator fic no one asked for

review:

this is soooooooooo cute and adorable and wow i luv ittttt!!! made me smile so hard it hurts

6. ) He Who Fights Monsters by magisterpavus

description:

In a world where monstrous dragons terrorize humanity daily, the Garrison trains valiant Knights to slay the evil beasts and defend Earth. But when Knight cadet Lance Espinosa is kidnapped by a strange red dragon who kills its own kind, certain truths are revealed…and so are the true monsters.

review:

oh my god the buildup may be slow but i promise it’s worth it like everything just falls perfectly into place !!! and its so adorable and creative and just wow not ur usual klance fanfic and that just makes it 1000x better and also,,, dragons !!

7. ) Bonding Time by magisterpavus

description:

“Shiro, I fucked up,” Keith blurted, wringing his hands.
Shiro paused mid-punch, shooting him a quizzical look. “What? What happened?”
“I think,” Keith whispered, “I think I accidentally roofied Lance. With my dick.”

review:

galra keith will always and forever be my fav au so this is a definite fav for me !!! i love the other 3 sequels it comes w too!! and nsfw content too dont even lie ik u guys are thirsty for that

8 .) Just Static by Jessadilla

description:

–Static—-
-iro, Hunk, Kei—, nybody? I’m—-
-static–
–I’m sorry guys. This is all my–
–static–cc–
—I found my coordinates. They’re–
-stttcc-
-guys. I hear something—
–scccc-
-end transmission-
Alone on a hostile planet, transmissions aren’t getting through. How did it come to this?

review:

this fic got me sad and crying in the middle of the night )’: wont leave u too sad tho the ending is pretty nice

9. ) What a Healing Pod Can’t Repair by Remember_Me

description:

The compromised wormhole was ripping apart at the seams, sending everyone spiraling away in completely different directions. Lance could feel himself being pulled and bent in ways he was definitely not supposed to be.

Stitching the team back together after everyone is separated is difficult, and for one Paladin rescue wouldn’t be coming for a very long time.

review:

no words. literally no words. this was so painful and just wow the buildup will shatter u i swear )’: also poor bb lance i sob. comes with cool-looking art which makes it a whole lot better

10. ) Seen: 5:29 by SpeedOfSins

description:

AU where Keith is some important guy who has a business suit, and lance is a good housewife. (tha ts a lie, i honestly dont have a summary but this fic hurts, i have been told by at least 3 people)
Written in text format

review:

will wreck u, beware!! may be short but enough to bring u to tears honestly

11. ) On Thin Ice by Minadora

description:

Once upon a time, two Canadian nerds decided to start a figure skating au about their two space sons and their wonderful misfit friends. Ten pages of headcanons later we finally put electronic pen to electronic paper and created this monstrosity. This multi-chapter fic chronicles the lives of a hockey player named Keith who gets forcibly enlisted into figure skating lessons by his brother, Shiro, to “work on his footwork”. There he meets a pompous - yet talented - figure skater named Lance and gets swept away by both the sport and the skater.
Enjoy the ride because it’s only just started.

review:

the description says it all !!!!! a fic beloved by the vld fandom and gosh whats not to love honestly???? also the whole gang is so happy !!! (sidenote: this is unfinished and its killing me)

12. ) I bet you look good on the dancefloor by xShieru

description:

“So like in 'Step Up’?” Allura shrugs. “Now that you put it like that - yes. I guess it’s just like in 'Step Up’.” The smile that she sends Shiro’s way - followed by a shy wave, eugh - is sickening to say the least, and Lance still doesn’t believe in dance camps.
-
Lance McClain’s dancing career begins and ends with Keith.
Keith just wants to find out what Lance’s deal is.

review:

if u love step up ur gonna LOVE this !!!! i love it so so so so much can i just say and wow keith is so hot ffs

13. ) thunderstruck by xShieru

description:

Lance doesn’t pine for anyone ever, Keith’s never been to a dance, Hunk tries his best to be supportive, Shiro is very done, and Pidge steals a car.But hey, it could’ve been worse.

review:

space prom!!!!!!! and cute pining gays!! whats not to love about that?

14. ) In English, Please

description:

Lance thinks he can get away with flirting with Keith if it’s in Spanish. Lance thinks if he says the words angrily enough no one will catch on to the ruse. Lance thinks his secret crush is safe. Lance, my friends, is very…very wrong.

review:

two words - too. cute. i can’t even with this fic