if this upsets you

the DM: Okay, at the end of the hallway is a stone door with no visible locks, latches, or opening mechanisms. Carved into the stone is an inscription that reads, “What is the sound of silence?”

the bard, instantly:  ♪ Hello darkness my old friend ♪

DM: …………………Oh my god. I forgot-

bard:  ♪ I’ve come to talk with you again ♪

DM: No, that’s not the answer- 

bard:  ♪ Because a vision softly creeping ♪

DM: Here, I’ve got my notes, let me change the riddle-

bard:  ♪ Left its seeds while I was sleeping  ♪

DM: Please-

bard, emphatically now:  ♪ AND THE VISION THAT WAS PLANTED IN MY BRAIN  ♪


bard:  ♪ STILL REMAINS ♪




bard:  ♪ OF SILENCE ♪

DM, with a visibly broken spirit: …Yeah, okay. The door swings open.

if there’s one thing I’ve learned from fiction it’s this

if you’re eavesdropping and hear people talking about you and they say something upsetting

make sure you stay and hear the conversation to the end don’t just run off into the night  you dumb chucklefuck

When you find an anime/manga really great at the start, but, the romance they added later on completely ruins it.
My group is entering a fortress through a secret room

Me, a Half-orc Cleric, OOC: i punch the door down

DM: uh ok but its a metal do-

Me, a Half-orc Cleric, OOC: i rolled a nat 20

DM: -looks at me, slightly scared- y-you punch the door so *fucking* hard that it flies across the next large room killing all the goblins that were in the path of the metal door

Me, a Half-orc Cleric: -rolled another nat 20 for intimadation check- WHO WANTS TO HEAR THE WORD OF GOD

DM: anyone who hasn’t been killed or already fled the scene is now scrambling to hide or flee the fortress.

Me, a Half-orc Cleric: damn right they are.

someone: i headcanon peter parker as trans

anyone with common sense and basic human decency: that’s a unique and valid way to look at his character. far out, dude. radical, my guy. and even if others don’t personally see it, there is no conceivable reason why that headcanon should really bother them or be met with negativity. you do you. happy vibes, man.

The Transphobes™:

My favorite thing is when an idol’s face shows up on the screen and the fans begin screeching, but the idol doesn’t know why they’re screaming all of a sudden, but then they go to look at the big screen and see their face and find out they’re the reason for the cheers and then they get all shy and don’t know what to do and-

omg just idols being loved and them being surprised/baffled at the amout of love shown towards them

you know what, shout out to autistic people who can’t manage their emotions for shit

autistics who have meltdowns once or multiple times daily from emotional overload

“overly sensitive” autistics

autistics who try to control their response to things that upset them but can’t

autistics who are greatly upset by seemingly small things

autistics who get told that it’s “not a big deal” and that they’re “overreacting”

autistics who are mocked for being upset

you’re freaking wonderful and i hope that you have a good day with minimal upsetting events. you deserve to feel okay and your emotions are always valid and real, don’t let anybody try to tell you otherwise.

We have a house rule that Bards need to actually sing or perform if they cast spells. Our party came across a skeleton near a puzzle. The puzzle knocks it into a pit.

Bard: Can I play a—a funeral dirge for this skeleton?

DM: Go for it.

Bard: *begins calmly fiddling in their bag OOC*

DM: Dude, do it or—

Bard: *takes forth and begins playing a kazoo*

The house rule no longer applies to that Bard.