if this grosses someone out

pro tip: before getting serious w a man, just casually mention ur period. like, just say ‘my cramps are bad rn’ or 'I have to go buy some pads’. his reaction is very telling of how mature and understanding he is. you don’t wanna be dating a grown ass man who gets grossed out by the word menstruation. u deserve someone who is comfortable w u and I do mean all of u. you’ll be thanking urself for doing it now and not later hun!

Some Batdad Headcanons

- When Dick first came to live with him, Bruce purchased a bunch of parent help books. He buys new ones with each kid he adopts, and no matter how much he studies he’s always unprepared for his psychotic children and their antics. 

- Everyone assumes Stephanie is his daughter and every time someone mentions it he and Steph are both thoroughly grossed out by the thought. 

- Damian shows Bruce his drawings sometimes, and every time, much to Damian’s embarrassment, Bruce insists on hanging them on the fridge. 

- The cabinets at Wayne Manor are filled to the brim with World’s Best Dad mugs. 

- Jason owns a Dad’s Little Stinker t-shirt. 

- When they were younger, Bruce used to let his Robins ride on his back if they got tired on patrol. 

- Tim falls asleep in random places when he’s particularly sleep-deprived, and each time Bruce will sigh tiredly before picking him up and carrying him up to his room, planning on drugging his coffee to get him to sleep more often.   

- Once he had to tie Damian to a post when he was misbehaving on patrol. 

- The first time Jason called him “Dad”, (on accident, mind you), he legit cried and hugged him for ten minutes straight. 

- He rarely has a bed to himself because his kids always invade his room at night and insist on sleeping with him. 

- He brags about Tim all the time to his coworkers, and it only got worse after Tim actually started working at Wayne Enterprises. At least once a day Bruce will go to Tim’s office and ask how his “little slugger” is doing. 

- He lets Cass paint his nails and isn’t afraid to leave the nail polish on because he’s so proud of how good of a job she did. Everyone is too intimidated to make fun of him for it.

- Even though he’s in his twenties and has an apartment of his own, Dick will still drive all the way to Gotham and sleep in Bruce’s bed when he has nightmares. 

- Bruce attends every single one of his kids’ graduations and award ceremonies, even the pointless ones that nobody really cares about. He will be there cheering in the front row every time.  

- Bruce was surprised that Barbara gave a Father’s Day gift to him in addition to her own father. 

- He carries around a bunch of pictures of his children in his batbelt and likes showing them to the criminals he arrests. Poison Ivy makes sure he keeps her up to date on how Nightwing is doing, and Two Face loves hearing about Red Robin’s whereabouts.     

finger guns

don’t flirt with me if we’re not extremely close friends(in which case i’d know u were joking and i’d be fine with it) its so weird and makes me uncomfortable

You were my first kiss. Not my first actual kiss, like in second grade when you kiss someone and you get all giggly and grossed out. Not in freshman year when you kiss someone you fully believe you’ll last forever with, then a month later break up with. Not a drunken hook up that resulted in nothing but a blank vagueness of the persons tongue in your mouth. You were the the first person to make my legs shake. I think my heart dragged down my body and I swear there was an earthquake in my ribcage. You were the first to grab me so tenderly, and make me believe that this kiss was something special. I knew the first time I kissed you it was going to be the start of something. I knew in my gut that you were my first real kiss and my last.

Aries as a lab tech: ALWAYS impatient when waiting for results even though that’s 80% of the job. Says they don’t need coffee/energy drinks… even though they still like to drink them. 

Taurus as a lab tech: Works hard, sometimes easily taken advantage of, but is first to complain about the over time that is inevitable.

Gemini as a lab tech: Easily distracted, makes work interesting with gossip or fun. Good with doctors/nurses but first to complain about them.

Cancer as a lab tech: Determined to master all benches. Will cover for others. Complains when a manager tries to work a bench.

Leo as a lab tech: Brags about their speed and accuracy on the hardest benches. Friends with the managers or tries to be them.

Virgo as a lab tech: Nit-picky about all the rules in the lab, dreads ever making a mistake/getting a strike, first to offer to train or help. 

Libra as a lab tech: Somehow finds a way to not work holidays and gets their preferred shift. Good with doctors, hates the stress of the job.

Scorpio as a lab tech: First to spot someone else’s mistake and to fix it, never grossed out, likes to make dirty jokes. Still intense on the job.

Sagittarius as a lab tech: The speediest! Makes all the lab puns. To the point. Secretly feels bad when someone has a bad result. 

Capricorn as a lab tech: Likely a manager. Knows how to run an efficient lab. Knows who is skipping lunch. Has a highly practical and science-oriented mind. 

Aquarius as a lab tech: Somehow does the tech support too. Good at their job but wishes they can do procedures differently. Either the aloof lab rat or goofball of the lab or both.

Pisces as a lab tech: Rolls with the punches. Loves it when they can do unusual cultures. Always helping others and covering for others.

Okay but...

Think of this, Lance having to put up so many masks that he loses sight of who he is.

I might be self projecting but coming from a really fuckin big family I have to throw up acts to suit certain family members or else I’d have to face them complaining to my parents (and thus getting the ruler/cane/umbrella/sometimes pens of dEATH) and/or just having to deal with their disappointment.

So since lance comes from a big family that’s what he does? And he does it so often that by the time he reaches the Garrison and later on joins Voltron everything is just a mask bc he doesn’t know what to think and doesn’t know who he is. But the team doesn’t know? Bc this is all they’ve known about lance and by now he’s so good at masking himself it’s almost like a second skin.

Ok then cue them going to an alien planet who’s been able to resist the Galra’s for sometime and they wanna make an alliance with the alien planet bc they could use the allies. But the aliens are really strict and they don’t take no funny business like flirting or whatever. So when they get to the planet they decide Lance might need to stay behind bc he’s an impulsive guy and might fuck things up. But it’d be weird if only one paladin was missing right? So it’s just Allura and Coran that go down to greet the alien race.

But the alien leader is unimpressed and is like “where is voltron how do we know you’re legit?” (More serious like but meh I’m too lazy fuck it). So they have no choice but to let Lance and the rest of voltron out of the castle. Everyone’s keeping an eye on Lance (and Keith kinda but moreso lance) but they’re so surprised when his entire attitude changes? He’s serious, answers questions eloquently and is standing like he’s some army soldier or something like that.

They’re all so surprised bc wtf Lance how are you so good at acting? But they have to put it out of their mind bc hello alliance and fighting Zarkon. The alliance is made successfully and they leave to which Lance just reverts back to his normal self but only after an hour after leaving the planet (bc from experience it takes time to dismantle one mask and then put on another)

Then during one of their calmer weeks where there isn’t much news or fighting, someone (pidge maybe?) offhandedly mentions how Lance acted during their stay on that planet. (And Lance isn’t there he’s doing his beauty guru stuff) And everyone is like “oh yeah wtf was up with that” and someone else just jokingly says “Lmao what if Lance is acting with us too?” And everyone’s laughing bc this is Lance and no way this is Lance we’re talking about.

Lance enters the room when someone makes that joke and he’s like “yeah I am” and everyone nervously laughs bc “haha yeah really funny Lance you’re just joking right?” And he just is so serious for once and “no I’m not”. Cue Long conversation on why he’d feel the need to put on a mask around them bc they’re family and Lance talking about his insecurities with the team and there’s crying and cuddles and everyone is talking about their internal problems bc “we need to get these off our chests anyways.”.
Shiro is afraid that he won’t be a good leader and will one day lead them to disaster.
Pidge is afraid she’ll never find her family and that she’ll one day lose them as well.
Keith is afraid of his heritage and one day just bringing the whole team down bc of that.
Hunk is afraid of not being able to protect the team properly.
Allura is afraid that they’ll never defeat Zarkon and that she might lose the team too.
Coran is afraid of losing the team, Allura everything. (And if you want for comedic effect Slav just appears and is like “I’m afraid of dying but this conversation has increased our chances of living by 67%! And there’s watery laughter as they pull Slav in for a hug too)

There’s more cuddles and the team wakes up the next day with disgusting crusty eyes and pillows that still have tear streaks on them. Everyone is grossed out bc someone (Hunk maybe lmao) drooled and there’s calls of “EWWW” mixed in with laughter and everyone feels lighter and mildly happier. And if for a moment just a small one, Lance feels a flicker of who he really is of the him without all the masks.

Of course not everything is fixed right away, when is it anyways? There’s still relapses where Lance pretends to be something he isn’t in reaction to a situation that he doesn’t know how to react to, and then there’s more cuddles and the team taking care of him. Sometimes Shiro dissolves into panic attacks, sometimes Keith just starts shouting for no reason, sometimes Pidge just starts sobbing when something reminds her of her family, sometimes Hunk’s screams can be heard throughout the castle as he has nightmares of his team dying bc he wasn’t able to save them, sometimes Allura overworks herself into exhaustion, sometimes Coran has to just constantly check on each member of the team every 5 minutes and he’s always nervous and scared when he does so. But the team is always there to help each other out, there’s bonding nights with huge cuddle piles, forts made from huge pillows and blankets, sad movies that end with sniffles or sobs, funny movies that end with people crying from laughter. They’re all a little broken but it’s okay bc the team will always be there.

And bc I’m a cruel bitch, imagine the teams reactions when Shiro disappears after all this happens :) and then when Lance is captured by Prince Lotor :)))))))

I love y'all don’t forget :)

(Reasoning why Lance would just admit he was acting: I’m probably self projecting again but tbh when I’m caught out and someone asks me if I’m just acting I don’t mind admitting it. Maybe subconsciously I know I’ve really lost myself and I might need the help so that’s why I admitted it. But also bc I don’t see the point in doing the whole cliche “w-what? No I’m not this is the real me” bullshit bc 100% of the time no one who actually cares about you will believe that, and Lance RECOGNISES that the team DOES care about him even though his lack of self esteem and overwhelming self doubt often makes him doubt that fact.)

(Also I’m really new to the Voltron fandom so I’m sorry if my writing is crappy and the characters are a little ooc pls forgive this child I’m trying my best)

(New edit: I also have a lot of really cool ideas on how to continue on from Shiro being missing so if y'all want me to continue just ask-)

Headcanon that after Matt and Dan’s wedding, everyone is sitting around (most of them drunk) and they all decide to disclose their Lists (for celeb banging ofc) and Dan goes first and gives the names of an actor, a soccer player, and, to everyone’s surprise, a male ballet dancer. 

Allison has a couple of musicians on her list. Renee swears she’s never heard of this List thing, but she promises to come up with at least one name by the end of the night. Aaron grudgingly admits that there are at least five actresses that he would totally bang given the opportunity, and Katelyn isn’t at all shy about listing off her celebrities.

Nicky’s list is too long to even bother going over, but Neil is situated in the lineup somewhere between eighth choice and fifth choice “because it just depends on the night, Neil, but don’t worry you’re still pretty.” 

Neil is also right at the top of Matt’s list, and at this point Andrew just casually sets his hand on top of Neil’s knee and meets Nicky and Matt’s gazes with an icy one of his own. So Matt, who is drunk and honestly doesn’t give a shit anymore, asks Andrew who’s on his List and Andrew just casually replies “I don’t need a list” and then Matt asks Neil and Neil says “it’s only ever been Andrew” and Nicky loses his shit because fuck Andrew and Neil are so in love and it’s really gross tbh like get them out of my face

Stop fucking opening shit in the makeup department
Like if you are 110% gonna buy it, go apeshit, but if just wanna “try it” or want to touch up your contour, you and your little grabby illegal hands are what keep me up at night. Cause you know what happens after you put it back?
or even WORSE
Someone buys your gross af face printed makeup and rubs it all over their face and lips!!!!!
Like I’m sorry if the only way you can get kissed is through making out with the Maybelline SuperStay Matte Ink Liquid Lipstick then letting some poor idiot buy it, but it gets thrown out!!!
Stop “trying” makeup products in the store! It’s gross! Don’t be gross!

Sincerely Three PDA headcannons

{I feel like this coulda been better but Idk here it is, enjoy! But it’s gender neutral so yay. If you want me to go into more detail on a particular character feel free to ask. Also I might do this for Zoe and Alanna so let me know if you’d like that. -Fiona}

-He’s not a fan of PDA
-Poor boy just gets a bit embarrassed
-This is mostly Jared’s fault
-And he’s worried you’ll gross someone out if the two of you kiss in school or something and they’ll make fun of you both
-Again, mostly Jared.
-The furthest he’ll usually go is putting his head on your shoulder or allowing you to do the same
-But, and it took him a while, you finally got him to hold your hand in the cafeteria
-sWEaTy bOY of course

-Doesn’t mind PDA
-He genuinely doesn’t know what the big deal is
-Cos who cares if people are looking???
-You’ve got like a weird system?
-Like, arm round the shoulder in cafeteria
-Hand holding in the hallways
-Kissy kissy tiem before/after school waiting for the bus
-No one teases you guys for the PDA
-Cos Connor Murphy
-Even Jared only makes the rare wise-crack

-Oh, this boy.
-At first the PDA was pretty normal, lowkey, and you were both fine with it
-But THEN as you both get more comfortable with each other the PDA gets… weird
-And not sexual weird
-Like, you once tapped your cheek for Jared to kiss it but instead he full on licks your face
-And everyone is so weirded out
-Zoe once made a joke about how you’re like one person cos of how close you are and you fucking stuck your head up his shirt and tried to get it through the neck hole thing in the middle of the cafeteria
-Evan shields his eyes cos Jareds nipple is almost out

daddy fetish type shit grosses me out so much that just seeing anyone call someone they think is attractive “daddy” stops upwards of 10 of my bodys natural processes dead in their tracks and i have to be taken to the hospital stat

Boyfriend Mark

Originally posted by jaehynu

  • looks like he’s seeing the sun for the first time when you first meet
  • his eyes follow your every move but he’s too shy to approach you
  • unluckily for him, donghyuk happens to notice his wandering gaze and drags him along to meet you; “hi, I’m donghyuk! this is mark! what’s your name?”
  • haechan maintains that he’s the driving force behind the entire relationship but you beg to differ
  • once mark gets to know you better he thinks ‘omg cute AND funny?! oh no’
  • this makes everything so much worse
  • how is he supposed to talk to you now?!?!!?
  • but he does, somehow, and acts all cool and shows off around you. he won’t show you the choreography for new comebacks but he’ll show you bits of them or play one of the melodies on his guitar
  • when you tell a joke, he laughs super hard and his hands seek you out, smacking your arm or gripping onto your top: “hAHAHAhah good one!”
  • eventually, the younger members come together to formulate a plan
  • Get-Mark-A-Date Plan is what they term it, not really trying to be secretive about it at all. they even tell mark that “by the end of this week, you’ll no longer be single ;)”
  • and he’s SWEATING bc what if u don’t wanna date him? :”( and then he ruins a great friendship. he also doesn’t trust any of them but ESPECIALLY not chenle or haechan but it’s too late, they’re already forming a plan
  • they try that thing where they say you’ll all meet up somewhere but then only you and mark go?? but you end up not going bc of an exam :/
  • so now it’s thursday and mark is still single like a pringle
  • jeno thikns of a brilliant plan >:)
  • he tells mark that he saw you with another boy that day, that you were holding hands scandalous
  • and not even thinking that it could be part of their “plan,” he’s super jealous and sad and rings you like “so I heard u got a boyfriend?”
  • and somehow you blurt out “no?? the only boy I want is you”
  • and although the kids can’t hear the conversation, they see how mark’s face lights up (they’re peeking into his room btw) and start SCREAMING
  • taeyong thinks there’s a murder happening but nope, they’re just so excited that their plan worked. no one knows how but it did :D
  • mark acts like “bro gross” whenever someone calls him your boyfriend or points out that you’re acting cute but inside he’s melting bc asdfghl yeah I’m her/his boyfriend :) :) 
  • acts cool but really loves holding hands and when you kiss his cheek or play with his hair
  • doyoung likes to be an embarrassing dad like “keep it PG kids :)” when you’re caught kissing and mother taeyong’s like “let them be kids! an innocent kiss is fine BUT NOTHING MORE >:/”
  • he gets more leeway since he’s the oldest of the babies and also rather mature
  • nct dream is cute and all but he suites nct u/127′s style more. he’s even said it himself that he likes the cooler concept more than aegyo so
  • he’s grown up for his age that’s a long ass ride
  • and hardworking, dedicated and intelligent
  • a lot of kids his age aren’t but he’s had to train hard to debut so he needs to be all those things to make it
  • although he doesn’t want to rush the relationship or do grown up things yet >.> he knows that he wants to do it all with you. just, in the future, not rn
  • so for now, holding hands is enough
  • and kissing too
  • your first kiss was so awkward and he snorted into your mouth. you bring it up to tease him but he’s adamant that he’s gotten better since
  • you need to be real sneaky when you kiss tho
  • there’s a lot of snakes in nct donghyuk
  • the relationship overall is very pure. you don’t fight much and you can talk to one another about anything. there’s no judgement or lack of trust whatsoever. he enjoys spending time with you, whether that’s when you lock his bedroom door and kiss under the covers or when you play video games with the others. he’s focused on his career, not so much on having an intense “buy a house, a pet, think about kids” relationship
  • he wants those things in the future but he’s happy with life how it is now :)
Guardians of the Galaxy Preference "How they react whenever they catch someone flirting with you"

(WOOOO OUR FAVES 😍😍Hope it is as requested and you all like it :3 Gif not mine/found it on google/credit to the original owners.)

Yondu-Whenever he’d catch someone flirting with you, he’d scoff in disbelief and would just listen to everything they have to say to you before practically showing them, exactly as to who you belonged to. He’d just have to whistle his arrow towards them as he warns them in his own way that you’re already taken, all while approaching you and finally wrapping his arm around you to bring you closer.

Peter-Whenever he’d catch someone flirting with you, he’d be surprised that they wouldn’t even consider you to be his and would just be so appalled, he’d let his displeasure show in the way he’d look or talk to them. He’d explain himself to be “Starlord” and that you’re clearly his lover, only to end up looking disappointed and would just exasperatedly ask them as to what makes it not obvious, leading into a long debate that you’d have to put an end to it.

Drax-Whenever he’d catch someone flirting with you, he’d just grab a hold of your hand, being blunt but would surprise you as to how surprisingly polite he can be before they piss him off. He wouldn’t see any malicious intent in it, simply taking it for a misunderstanding. However, as soon as they disrespect you and him, he’d have zero problem grabbing them by their throat and threatening to kill them.

Rocket-Whenever he’d catch someone flirting with you, he’d instantly climb up your shoulder or really when he can, just shove them away from you, practically snarling and growling at them. He’d just hate to hear people sweet talk you so much, he’d take matters into his own hands and get all sorts of aggressive just to get them to leave you alone forever, even his human form he can’t help but growl and all.

Gamora-Whenever she’d catch someone flirting with you, she’d try to keep her calm and say nothing, not wanting to seem easily jealous but from the way she’d keep her eyes on you would just have to catch yours and theirs attention. She’d then try to dismiss them, waiting for you to step up yourself and tell them that you were already taken, hence she’d keep looking over at you as if she’s pressing onto you.

Nebula-Whenever she’d catch someone flirting with you, she’d pretend to be grossed out and would just make comments about how low they must be to shamelessly talk to you that way. Although, she wouldn’t openly step up to intervene, she’d just complain to you about it so much, you’d catch onto how she felt and would just have to deal with it until it passes.

Mantis-Whenever she’d catch someone flirting with you, she’d be amazed and would just find it funny, as she’d agree with them on a lot of point when they’d compliment you. She’d laugh and get in the “conversation”, thinking they were simply trying to befriend you and would be so overly involved, she’d end up scaring them away, only to get sad and disappointed that they left.

Kraglin-Whenever he’d catch someone flirting with you, he’d see it as his opportunity to prove himself as a man and would just act all sorts of smug and arrogant to get straight to the point. He’d approach them with his gun, smirking as he asks them as to what they think they’re doing, only to hint at you to get closer to him and just practically show of that you’re already his.

Ronan-Whenever he’d catch someone flirting with you, he’d feel insulted and would already resort to destroy them completely, until you’d have to put a stop to him yourself. He’d just get so mad on the spot, he wouldn’t be able to keep it to himself and would make a whole scene of it, truly scaring everyone else around as well, only to tone it down as you’d reassure him.

Stakar-Whenever he’d catch someone flirting with you, he’d casually introduce himself and subtly brag about his position and such, only to of course leading the conversation as to who you are. He’d just have the need to prove himself and would even go as far as to get some of the crew to circle them, warning them that the next time he sees them it won’t be as simple.

The Collector-Whenever he’d catch someone flirting with you, he’d be appalled and would just be taken so aback he’d stop everything that was happening just to put them on the spot and question their intentions. He’d make his way closer and closer to them, lowering his voice the more he’s starting to threaten them personally and as to what he’d do to them if they keep talking or even looking at you.

Garthan Saal-Whenever he’d catch someone flirting with you, he’d instantly get annoyed and wouldn’t be able to hide it, especially with the way he’d stare at them with disdain and the choice of words he’d use to speak to them. He’d try to be casual about it but he’d always end up getting all up in their face before grabbing your hand to leave.

Tags : @dontaskmemyfavoritesong, @nikkinikki97, @lynn8dabeast92-blog, @uss-lesbian, @tearsofebony, @shortoneofabakersdozen, @rootbeergoddess, @unlaceddoll​, @hurried-and-anxious​, @greek-freak101, @madamrogers,@shersuperwho-blog, @angel-with-broken-wings, @meloz-draws, @kylorenlover15,  @stargazing-in-space​, @toomanyotpslove, @sixsixsixpickupsticks, @ladyoakensheildmalfoypurdymanson, @to-unseen-dreams, @notice-me-senpai-sama, @disorderly-conduct, @hiccuplovver, @Erikaaferns, @ecurrier109, @purplemuse89, @fandomwritingismylife, @ichimaruai,@samwinchesterhasbeensaved, @happyshaddow94,@master-of-schadenfreude, @my-youth-is-my-own, @iammostdefinitelyonfire26, @harry-hart-superspy@forestraccoon, @byzantium-glytch  

She is Mine (Part 3) - Carl Grimes & Negan Imagine

Part 1

Part 2

requests: when you get the chance could you maybe write a Carl imagine taking place back at negans sanctuary and one of negans wife catches his eye (she’s around the same age as Carl) and negan is yelling at her about something and Carl gets pissed and glares at him and yeah you can think of an ending? sorry. Thank you

yeah! great. keep it going

Can you please do a 3 part of “ she is mine ” thank you

pairings: carl x reader, friendly negan x reader

a/n: please give me some ideas if you want me to continue this! ya girl needs some help lol

word count: 1,061

tagged users: @deeindarkwonderland @namelesslosers @raveneyedfreak 

“He let me go,” you told the boy. He told you his name was Carl, and that his father was the leader of the group who lived in Alexandria. “He told me that I didn’t have to be married to him anymore. Although, it was all just pretending anyway. There was no official ceremony or anything like that. I just did it so I would be safe.” 

Carl nodded and looked away from you. “That’s good. You know, I was really grossed out when I saw he was with someone my age. I’ve seen some bad stuff, but that’s pretty high on the list of things that have disturbed me.” 

You smiled at him in agreement. “Yeah. To be fair, though, he didn’t force me to stay with him. I was terrified of what would happen if I tried to leave, but I don’t think he would have hurt me or forced me to do anything I wasn’t comfortable with.” 

“Other than wear high heels, right?” 

You laughed for what felt like the first time in ages. Sure, you had faked a smile or two just to get Negan to leave you alone, but Carl actually made you feel happy. 

“(Y/N)!” Negan’s booming voice snapped you out of your trance. You and Carl both turned your heads towards the man who was quickly marching down the paved road. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” 

“I asked you what you wanted me to do, and you didn’t give me a job,” you replied. You tried your hardest to sound calm, but your heart rate was rapidly increasing, for Negan seemed angrier than ever. 

“That doesn’t answer my question.” 

You sighed and rolled your eyes. “I found company. I’m socializing. Making friends.” 

“Yeah, well we don’t have time for you to be making friends. Save that for when we get back to the Sanctuary.” Negan grabbed your upper arm and pulled you away from Carl. “It’s time to go.” 

Negan glared at Carl, and he seemed furious. “Keep to yourself, kid. I already let you off the hook once. We don’t need another meeting like last time. Right?” 

Carl nodded, his eyes avoiding contact with yours. You turned to him one last time and smiled. He returned the gesture, and you knew you would find a way to see him again soon. 

“I don’t want you around that kid. He’s a fuckin’ mess.” Negan continued to ramble on and on about how terrible Carl was, but you couldn’t care less. Anyone who earned Negan’s disapproval was alright in your book. 

“What happened last time?”

Negan raised his eyebrow at you, letting go of your arm to set you in the passenger’s seat of his truck. “What last time?” 

“You know,” you started, but paused until he walked around the front of the truck and climbed in the driver’s side. “You told him you didn’t need another meeting like last time. What happened last time?” 

Negan started the car and began to back out of Alexandria. The rest of his Saviors followed behind the truck in their massive carriages. 

“Negan, what happened?” 

“He broke into the Sanctuary to try to kill me, but he fuckin’ failed. That’s what happened. The kid went on a god damn suicide mission and expected to take me down in the process.” 

“I know you’re not telling me the whole story. Why can’t you just tell me what happened?” You were getting more and more worked up as he continued to leave you unsatisfied with vague responses. You weren’t going to let him off trial until you knew what you wanted to know. 

“We busted balls! I made him cry a little. It wasn’t a big deal.” Negan scoffed and turned his head so he was facing the road ahead of him. 

“If it wasn’t a big deal, then why didn’t you just tell me that in the first place?” The thought of Negan upsetting Carl to the point where he cried made you want to punch him in the face, but you knew that would get you nowhere. 

“Because, darling, I’d hate to ruin my dazzling reputation.” 

You huffed and crossed your arms, turning your shoulders away from him. “Why did you make me leave him back there?” 

“Jesus Christ! Who told you today was the day to interview me? I don’t have the energy to answer all these damn questions!” 

“Negan, for the love of god, please just give me one good reason why you took me away from him in the middle of our damn conversation.” Your breathing was more controlled than it was before, but you were nowhere near calm. 

“I can’t have you socializing with the enemy, (Y/N). I gotta have you on my side.” Negan seemed sincere when he told you this, but his facial expression instantly changed once he realized what he had said. 

“Why wouldn’t I be on your side? You’ve treated me so well. I have no reason to go against you.” 

Negan shut his eyes and brought a hand up to his temple. “I… I’ve done things I’m not proud of, and I don’t want you to look at me any differently. I know I let you go, but you’re still mine. You’re still a Savior, and I care about you. I want you to feel the same way about me, and I’m afraid Carl will try to change that.” 

You knew Negan was capable of doing brutal things. Hell, you had seen them happen with your own eyes. He had split up marriages, assaulted people until they lost consciousness, and probably more that you weren’t aware of. You always had an idea of who Negan was, and that he wasn’t a saint. 

He was opening up to you, though. You felt compelled to the same. Maybe it was stupid and in the heat of the moment, but you told him how you were feeling. 

“I miss being around people my age. I haven’t met anyone like Carl in a long time, and I know you don’t really care-” 

“I do,” he interrupted. “I do care. Continue.” 

“I’d like to get to know him. You know, I think we’ll have a lot in common, considering we both grew up the same way.” 

Negan scratched his chin, something you noticed he did when he was thinking. 

“We’ll see.”

Originally posted by negangifs


hey , dont fucking ship chris with any of the contestants . he’s a grown man , 30 something years old , and the contestants are only teenagers . I’m saying this because on deviantart I saw fanart of chris and duncan , chris and courtney , chris and lindsay all in a sexual way and it makes me sick . please stop , its creepy and very pedo like



AN: Hiii beautiful peeps! how are you? So, this is something I’ve been thinking about for a while but, as I’m not as half as talented as the people here plus being English my second language, I’ve always been pretty scared to write this. However in the last few days it became almost painful thinking about this story and not putting it on (digital) paper. So here it is the first part. Leave a feedback, if you want. Of any kind.

Before leaving you with the story, I’d like to thank the people I talk to here on tumblr and other social media: YOU ROCK GUYS! (and sorry if sometimes I bother you too much or get overexcited) (you know who you are)

WARNINGS: few curses (sorry), mention of period (I don’t think it’s too harmful but someone could be grossed out)


here you are ‘Mangoes’ *plays trumpet*

You suddenly realized you were bouncing your legs and the ‘click-click’ of the heels could be heard in the whole airport.

You didn’t know why you were anxious.

Well, you knew.

But you hadn’t yet realized you were THAT anxious.

You rubbed your hands on your face.

You weren’t ready to face whatever was waiting for you behind that gate.

You hadn’t seen him in a week and, although you were over the moon when he told you he was going to bring Luz as his date to the Oscars, for both emotional and logistic reasons, you were regretting your choice: you needed to be with him.

To support him.

“Or to have his support?” You told yourself with a low voice.

The news caught you off-guard: you never said it out loud, but you were sure he was going to win.

To make everything worse? Paul, Benji and Justin were the nicest guys ever and you really enjoyed their work, but the love of your life was… The love of your life.

You weren’t worried about all that Egot, pegot, pigeon, how-you-wanna-call-it stuff. You were worried about all the preassure he received, you were worried about the future interviews, you were worried about the side effects of this loss on the creative process of the man you loved.

Deep in your mind you knew you were over-reacting but let’s face it: he had quite a ego and things like this could trigger in his mind trails of not-so-optimistic thoughts. You simply didn’t want him to build a fortress around his persona.

You’ve talked to him on phone in the past few days and even faced-time him: he seemed sad and upset, but it was something barely percepible. He said: ‘I have never thought I had a chance of winning. I was just thrilled to be there and to introduce Auli'i.’ On the other side of the emotions spectrum, Luis was furious and more than once he was stopped from publishing not so nice comments on twitter. Luz called you the evening after the ceremony and said she caught her mother sniffling on the balcony of the hotel room.

You knew what was happening: they were sad because they imagined he was sad, he was keeping all the emotions trapped in his chest to not worry them. He was usual to act like that until he reached the breaking point, which consisted in writing a heart-wrenching song or a fight between the two of you over ‘why the arabic coffee blend wasn’t as good as the brazilian’ or similar silly things.

But this time it felt different.

It was different.

This time you’ll have to be the 'glue’ to keep him together, a thing that he did for you during the hormones or job-related freaking out moments.

But were you ready?

You didn’t know. You didn’t know how to get ready. You didn’t know anything except that his flight has just landed, as the board suggested.

You checked the time on your phone just to be blocked be the sight of your lockscreen. It was one of your favorite photos: he was napping on the bed, surrounded by 'his girls’: the twins only few months old at his sides and your dog at his feet. You came back from the kitchen with two bottles of warm milk just to find that heart-melting view. You snapped the pic quickly before waking them up.

'Lin, wake up.’ You tried to call him.

He had developed this strange habit during your honeymoon (which happened almost a year ago): as he was hot, he slept wrapped around your body with his head on your chest. You couldn’t complain as it was January, in Iceland. 
But NY in September was surely hotter.

'Lin, sweetheart, you have to wake up.’ You repeated raising your voice a little.

'Don’t call me sweetheart.’ He mumbled in your skin.

'Ah ah, you are awake.’ You said poking at his head.

'Why did I marry such a smart woman that makes me appear so stupid?-he placed a kiss on your skin before turning his face towards you with a loving gaze- Oh, now I remember.’ He smiled.

'Don’t even try to compliment my beauty in order to stay in bed.’

'But it’s Sunday. And I’m on a very soft and warm spot I’d like not to leave.’ He smirked winking in your direction.

'Are you implying I’ve gained weight?!’ You tried to fake rage.

'Just in the right spots.’ He said.

'WHAT?!’ Now you were a little offended. You pushed him away and tried to leave the bed.

'Ehii. Don’t be mad at me! You are the one that explained me why women gain weight during period.-he stopped you on the side of the bed- And as I was saying, only- he kissed a spot on your shoulder-in- another kiss- the-kiss- right- kiss- places.’

'That doesn’t change my feelings.’ You replied sitting on the bed, checking the phone while he put his chin on your shoulder. 'Moreover I’m not on my period.’

'Yes, you are.’ He said.

'No, I’m not. Trust me, it’s difficult to not notice if you are bleeding.’ You snapped back.

You felt him streaching to reach his phone on the conforter.

'Yes, your period should have started 5 days ago.’ He said checking something on the screen.

'Please, tell me you don’t have a period app.’ You said trying to hide your laugh.

'If your wife turns into a angry and hungry, fire- spitting.. - you turned to watch him with revengeful eyes and he noticed- but super smart and beautiful dragon, you’d have done the same.’ He smiled.

'Well, your app is wrong… Not in the calculation (you mentally checked if 28 days has passed). But I’m not on my period right now. Although it’s very strange: I’m a Swiss clock!’ You said a little worried.

'Y/N, you have done crazy shifts at work this past week!’

'Yes, you could be right. It has to be the stress.’ You said putting your socks on.

'Absolutely! And you know which is the best remedy?’ He dragged you back on a lying position.

'Lin-Manuel Miranda, don’t even try. You have planned this brunch with our parents- you said getting up and heading towards the bathroom- So, you and that cute little ass of yours have to leave the bed. Or we’ll be late.’

'Hey! My butt is cute but it ain’t “little”!’ He replied lying on the side and pointing towards it.

You laughed and before entering the bathroom, you stood in front of the mirror.

'Did I really put on so much?’ You said with a defeated look.

'Man, I shouldn’t have never said it! - he facepalmed himself- or at least I should have put it in a better way. What I meant, you know, … It’s… Like… God, that’s embarassing…’

You turned to face him. 'Lin, I married you. And trust me, your 'emarassing-things-i’ve-done’ list is well know to me. Spit it.’

'Let’s say that your “side A” has … How can i … “Improved”.. Yes, that’s the word!’ He was stummering and blushing. He was simply the cutest.

'Whut?’ You giggled.

'In the last ten days, some outfits you wore were like.. Seriously mind blowing..’ He continued moving his hands as to show an explosion.

And you could recall few times he complimented you more than usual before leaving the house in the morning.

'But I haven’t forgiven you yet.- you said picking your clothes and heading towards the bathroom. Ah, I’ll need this room for a quite long time. Maybe it’s better if you use the other one.’ You said winking and closing the door.

'Damn, I knew this going going to happen.’ You heard him shouting.

What you both didn’t know was that you were having the same thoughts.

'What if she’s preg-..’

'What if I’m pregnan- No, Y/N, don’t even think about it. It’s just stress. Don’t think about it.’ You mumble to yourself while shampooing.

You were in your undies, washed, moisturized staring at your dress: a wonderful, pencil-skirt, teal and blue dress. It was one of your favorite as it was knee-lenght but it fitted you perfectly in all your right places.

It was the moment of truth: it was your reference to see if anything changed in your body.

You wore it and started pulling the zip up: 'side b’ area went smooth, no visible changes in you belly area either.

You breathed with relief.

'Ah! I was right!’ You said with pride.

You couldn’t be more wrong.

The 'improvement’ Lin pointed out was real and you had to remove your bra to close the zip all the way up.

'Damn it, he was right.’ You said putting your hands on your hips and noticing how your 'side A’ as he called it was quite prominent from the v-shaped cut.

You checked the time on your phone: 'LIN, WE’RE ALMOST LATE!’ You screamed rushing outside the bathroom.

'I’m ready in the kitchen waiting for you. Do you want some coffee?’ He shouted.

'Lin, we’re going to a brunch. Breakfast and lunch. Which means plenty of coffee.’ You answered back while putting on shoes, a blazer and taking your earrings.

'But I need my coffee.’ He insisted.

'You’ll have a ulcer soon if you keep ingesting all this caffeine.’ You get to the kitchen while putting on the jewels.

You found him staring back at you with his mouth open and his mug mid-air.

'What?’ You said putting your head down and shaking your hair to give them volume.

He was still silent.

'Lin? - you looked back at him- should I go change?’ You pointed at your dress.

'WAIT. NO. This is exactly what I meant earlier.. You’re just so.. I’m trying to figured out how you you possible ended up marring me..’ He said at the speed of light.

You were blushing as a 16 years old high schooler. 'I’m fluttered- you said kissing his cheek and putting his mug down, but I don’t think it would make a good excuse with the parents. Chop chop. Let’s go.’ You headed towards the door swining your hips more than usual.

'Is this some sort of punishment for what I said earlier?’

'Dang it. You really are a MacArthur genius.’ You winked teasing him.

The brunch went well until you all decided to have some fruit.

'I’ll take the mango salad.’ You said reading the menù.

'Mango? Y/N, you hate mango!’ Your mother said looking at you.

'I remember the time me and Luis’s sister were pregnant at the same time and we ate mangoes all the times. In fact, there’s a legend according to which if you’re pregnant with a Miranda, you’ll even dream mangoes.’ Luz said and all started laughing.

You and Lin, instead, widened your eyes and looked at each other remembering your unshared thoughts of few hours before.

You could almost see the huge, red-written sign spelling 'SHIT’ on each other faces.

Soon the other four people noticed your silence.

'Lin-Manuel, is everything alright?’ Asked Luis while the others were all smilig at you.

You were on the point of throwing up.

'Yes, papa. I think that Y/N wants mango just because I made her try the mango flavoured tea you brought us from London. Honey, maybe it’s better if you stick with strawberries. You know, fresh mango is a stronger flavour. You have plenty of time to exercise before starting eating it non stop for 9 months.’ He took your hand and gave it a little squeeze.

You got what he was doing as you haven’t drink any tea recently.

'You’re right.’ You almost whispered before excusing yourself and going to the restroom.

You could still hear Lin engaging a conversation with the two women about fruits and pastries to move their attention from what has just happened.

You went to the bathroom and put your wrists under the cold water in attempt to calm you down.

You didn’t want to think about this right now. You want to do it at home. With Lin.

Then you went to the bathroom and you found out your period came.

But you weren’t as relieved as you thought. Yes, you were sad. A little bubbly Lin wasn’t a bad thing at all. But apparently destiny had different plans for you.

Before going out you sent a text  Lin: 'False allarm. Red wave just arrived.’

You went back to the table and you found him still talking about the secrets for a flaky pie.

'Lin, your phone buzzed. You should check it.’ You said sitting down.

'Don’t worry, I’ll see it later.’ He answered.

'It could be something important’ you squeezed his thigh staring him in the eyes.

He got the message and took the phone. You could feel his smile fading. He took your hand and place a kiss on it.

The brunch continued and the six of you went for a stroll then each couple went a difference direction.

As you were walking home you passed in front of the supermarket and, as he could read your mind, he said: 'You still want that mango, am I right?' 

You nodded and added 'We also run out of painkillers and I’ll need them these days.’

'I’ll go to the pharmacy and you the store. Meet me in 10 at the ice cream isle.’ He said kissing you.

So you did. When you met next to the refrigerators, he was happier than when you left him minutes before.

'Since when pharmacy makes you happy?’ You asked while picking your favorite type of ice cream.

'Since they started selling… LOLLIPOPS!’ He jumped showing two candies and giving you one.

'You’re such a kid.’ You laughed.

He coughed showing the wedding band.

'Let’s go pay this fruit and ice creams.’

As you went home, you undressed to get ready to chill on the couch as each Sunday.

He was still in the bedroom when you called him 'Lin, do you want to watch a movie?’ You fell on the couch.

'Not yet.’ He shouted.

'Yet? Do we have to do something?’ You asked.

'Did your flood continued since this morning?’ He asked poking his head from the door.

'I’m sorry, what?’ You asked at the unusual question.

'Did your bleeding continued since this morning?’ He asked again with his hands wrapped around his torso.

'This is gross. But not so much.- you answered skeptically- Do you mind telling me why you’re asking me this? I’m ok with sharing, less details maybe.’

'Could you check again?’


'Please Y/N. I promise I’ll explain if you do.’

'You’re acting weird but ok.’ You headed to the bathroom with him waiting outside.

It actually seemed like your period stopped so you went out and told him.'For your information, my period is not active right now. Now, my explanation.’

'Sit down and I’ll do it.-he showed you a spot on the bed- This is something I remembered from when Luz was pregnant and I went with her to the gyno- he saw the shocked and disgusted expression on your face- I STOPPED IN THE WAITING ROOM. Today, words keep failing me. However, there’s this thing called 'implantation bleed’ that resembles period but it’s the egg.. Implanting… It was more scientific in my mind.’ He chuckled.

'Lin, I don’t think..’ You said looking down.

'The mangoes, Y/N.’ He said with his eyes sparkling.

'I love your mother, you know this. But as a woman in a world were science exsist, I can’t trust “mangoes stories”.’ You said placing a hand on his cheek.

'Let’s just try. I’ve bought the test.’

That’s why he was so happy. You didn’t know what to do: this morning you realized you wanted to have babies as soon as possible. At the same time you didn’t want to be delusional.
You were going to say no but you saw his expecting and hopeful eyes. You couldn’t let him down. Maybe he could have been right.

'Ok- he jumped up hugged you- but I’ll pee and then leave them in the bathroom. We’ll watch a movie and later we’ll check. Got it?’ You said.

'Yes, ma'am.’ He went to his wardrobe and took 3 boxes.

'Lin, three?’

'Just to be sure.’ He smiled.

'You’re a pain in the ass, Manuel.’

'I love you too.’

You both smiled at the inside joke.

You went to the bathroom, did what you have to do and then the both of you went to the living room with popcorns, your chopped fruit and the infamous tea.

Lin wrapped his arms around your legs, that were resting on his own, while your head was on his chest.

After ten minutes your heartbeat was almost normal, you started enjoying the story and started laughing at the improbable adventures of the characters.

15 minutes from the end, Lin stand up to go to the bathroom as he drank almost a litre of tea and you were so caught in the story, you didn’t even realize was going to happen.

You just heard him shouting.

You jumped from the couch and went to the bathroom expecting to see blood/ body parts missing from him.

'LIN! What the hell happened?’ You shouted as an answer.

You found your full grown husband on the floor with his hands on his face saying something you couldn’t understand.

You knelt next to him: 'Lin, what happened?’ You tried to remove the hands just to find his face red and covered in tears.

'Mangoes. Y/N. MANGOES.’ He said smiling even more.

You connected the dots and standed up to have a confirmation: the three test had 2 lines on it.

'MANGOES!’ You screamed crying before reaching the same spot Lin was.

After almost an hour of laugh, tears, kisses and 'mangoes’ you stood up.

You decided to not tell the news to anyone until the ultrasounds.

A month later you organized a little dinner at your house for your parents.

They found not one, but two little mangoes in their plates.

You could feel your heart in your throat. Your tongue was dry. Those memories put you even more on the edge of tears so you decided to stand up and walk a little bit just to see a huge billboard about Maldives.

“Oh, man.” You whispered with a defeated voice while the memories started to flood in your mind.