if there is anything wrong with spelling please let me know

anonymous asked:

"crazy detention stories"...go

They’re really not that crazy I don’t think but fine- but as I had detention at least once a week for 3 years you’re only getting the highlights here:

  • So again, I only ever got detentions because I was late to school basically every day. Every single day, the office wrote me a late slip with my name spelled horrendously wrong. Different spelling every day. The most famous butchering was writing my name as “Millie Hoagie”. On my very last day of high school, I was predictably late, and they spelled my name perfectly correctly.
  • So listen my ‘reputation’ in school was basically “quiet good girl who’s never done anything wrong, ever, in her life” and “teacher’s pet” and the like. And despite the fact I was there every time all the ‘Bad Kids™’ who were also always in detention were always incredibly surprised to see me??? Like they never got over it. Every time I walked into the damn room at least half the class would be like “MOLLY YOU DON’T BELONG HERE YOU’RE INNOCENT!!” 😂
  • Also despite the fact I was basically invisible in the school as a whole all the trouble makers knew me by name because, and I quote a kid from my 10th grade Spanish class who was trying to hook up with me at the time here, “Guys like me are afraid of you, Girl, we’re just plain out scared that we gonna corrupt you!” and I still don’t know what he actually meant by that???
  • Bu anyway, this apparent rep usually gave me an upper hand with the teachers monitoring the detentions. Because, you know, some were fine, some were bitchy, some were insane. But all of them were pissed about the fact they had to be there instead of heading home.
  • The rules of detention were literally just ‘stare at the wall and don’t talk’, depending on which teacher they might let the students do homework. But since I was apparently a great person and always had the class’ incredulous response to me being in the room, they usually let me get away with sleeping or reading a book lol.
  • Of course…no one said any of the other kids were inclined to following the rules lmao. These were like, all the class clowns™ shoved into one room. Things always got real funny real fast.
  • It would always start off with the coughing game. If you’ve ever stepped into a school you should know what that is.
  • It would then escalate to everyone in the room playing catch whenever the teacher looked away for a brief moment
  • Detention was always in the health classroom so someone always tried to steal a limb off the skeleton without being to obvious
  • Some teachers would let people talk ‘quietly’ so jokes were fucking abound
  • One time I was minding my own damn business and a kid slides me a note saying ‘in like five minutes ask to go to the bathroom but head downstairs to the English wing’ before he snuck out without the teacher noticing. I get down there and he’s at one end of the hallway and another boy is at the other end. Upon seeing me, these boys run full speed down the hall at each other, leap up in the air when they get to the direct center, high five with full force, both scream in pain, and then hit the floor, clutching their hands. I was cracking the fuck up and trying to convince them to go to the nurse but they wouldn’t listen. I asked the guy why the hell they did that. He told me ‘because we wanted a witness and no one will ever believe you’ 😂😂
  • One time my sorta-neighbor Mike comes in and the teacher asked why he had detention and apparently, the principal had asked him where to find his friend Jose, and Mike responded “he’s out picking cotton” and the principal flipped out at what he perceived to be a racist joke and gave him a month detention. But the thing was, Jose was in an agriculture class and he was literally outside picking cotton that they had planted there earlier. Jose found it fucking hilarious and refused to tell the principal to get his friend out of trouble.
  • As I haven’t been inside a school building for quite some time now I don’t know if turtling is still a thing but it was…quite an epidemic for my senior class.
  • It’s when you turn someone’s backpack inside out right? But it was a full blown war with these kids. Trust no one. Never leave the room. Never look away. Holy shit. One of the best moments of this occurred in detention, when a boy reached to get a book out of his backpack to find it was gone. After 15 minutes of searching the room, he found it, turtled, hidden in a filing cabinet in the front of the room. Everyone, including the teacher, was loosing their shit, because how did someone pull that off so quietly and invisibly without someone noticing??? No one fessed up. The class was in fear of the turtle ninja for the rest of the month, but they never struck again. No one ever discovered who it was.
  • Guys: It was me.
  • One time it was raining and the teacher was in a bad mood so he insisted all the windows stay open. He left for a bathroom break or something and this one poor kid, who was now completely soaked as he was stuck with a window seat, just said “fucking bye” and just…climbed out the damn window. Left his backpack and everything. Didn’t see him again for at least a month.
  • There was one guy who always sold ice cream out of his bag when the teachers weren’t looking. Where he was getting it from and how it stayed frozen is beyond me.
  • Oh my God sometimes all the indie singer kids would just come and sit on the floor outside the classroom and talk loudly to annoy us??? The hell were they trying to accomplish??? Your singing ain’t special and you won’t be famous, please let us die in peace.
  • One kid had detention because when we were running laps in gym class he jumped up to hit the arch of the ceiling and accidentally set off the fire alarm. The teacher that day insisted on continuously referring to him as ‘the delinquent’, as if no one else in the room had broken the rules or something
  • One time one of the gym teachers was in charge of it and long story short he started doing the jersey turnpike. True horror.
  • One time the teacher got a call and she had to go down to the office and the second she was gone this one kid’s friend runs in with a huge tray going “Y’ALL I STOLE THE LASAGNE CUPCAKES FROM THE FOOD AND NUTRITION CLASSROOM” and we dined like kings.
  • Everyone would sometimes just break out in song for no God damn reason
  • One time one of the guys in charge of the detention was A) Not someone anyone recognized as a teacher and B) Potentially Stanley Tucci. Like…I was about 80% certain that this guy was Stanley Tucci.
  • He refused to confirm or deny or even give a name
  • One time I was really absorbed in my book when all the sudden a letter flew onto my desk, an anonymous sender that just said “You have a soft, sexy voice.” Neither of which is true, I’m pretty sure, and I could not for the life of me figure out who sent it omfg
  • One time a teacher was freaking out because he went to a psychic over the weekend and was told there was a lot of activity around him so I looked him straight in the eyes and told him I’m a medium and I can see that the devil had marked his soul and he threw me out of the room and refused to take that class for detention ever again😂
  • It was a hot summers day. The ceiling fans were on their highest setting. A boy nudges me, with a small carton of ice cream in his hands under his desk. “What do you think would happen if I scooped out a huge chunk of this and threw it at the fan?” he whispered. “Jamil, no.” I pleaded, but it fell on deaf ears. Soon, the room was filled with confused screams.
  • Apparently all the other regulars™ had bought me candy grams around Christmas time so they were confused when I showed up to detention with no candy and apparently the student council member sent them all to the other Molly in the grade because she was the popular one and this lead to about 12 boys grumbling for two and a half hours like “The one damn time I attempt to be a gentleman” and “I know where she lives” and “Gonna gingerbread her fucking locker” I could not stop laughing
  • Oh God okay one time the teacher we had was literally. Off the charts.
  • Like there’s the chill teachers, and then the bitchy teachers. And then this lady. She literally reminded me of Stubel
  • So I didn’t even know who she was but I walk in and do my shy smile/quiet ‘hello’ thing and take out my book so she immediately zeros in on me as ‘the good kid’ as usual
  • But she literally seemed to think every other person in this class was a hardened criminal holy shit. She was all over the place barking orders and yelling. And of course, you’ve got a room full of class clowns, like they feed off teachers like this. So the madder she got the more ridiculous they got. I was literally almost in tears trying to force myself not to laugh because I didn’t want to risk her turning on me omfg
  • So she yelled and flailed about the room and they kept going with jokes and paper wasps and lying about their names and just doing literally every thing they could possibly do so this woman wouldn’t have the chance to rest
  • This escalated with every minute and came to a resounding end when the teacher decided the Australian Kid™ was chewing gum and picked up the trashcan and shoved his face in it, screaming at him to spit it out as he yelled back “YOU’RE ONLY DOING THIS BECAUSE IM AN IMMIGRANT
  • he was in charge of all the bullshit that day and it was hysterical but he wasn’t the one chewing gum loudly that was me
  • The vp came in to see what all the yelling was about to find a teacher shoving a boy’s head in the trash, one boy shirtless as another drew tattoos on him, the phone off the line with it’s cord wrapped around a kid’s neck, two boys dueling with skeleton arms, one kid with her leg out the window, a kid tying a skeleton foot to the ceiling fan, rubber bands and paper wasps flying from every angle, three people turtling backpacks, someone brandishing an epi-pen, sexual hangman being played on the chalkboard, someone eating ice cream and fanning himself with money, and me, crying into my book with my hand literally bleeding from all my efforts to not laugh at what I was witnessing
  • We never saw her in detention again😂
  • My one younger friend got a detention for being late and was really shaken up about it and I tried to tell her she’d be fine but then she got caught sliding me chocolate animal crackers during it, and subsequently got another detention because of this; somehow I was not viewed as an equally guilty party and didn’t get in trouble
  • This one guy came in complaining “You guys all told me to get a twitter and I get thrown in twitter jail my first day!” “That’s like a thousand tweets in one day, how the fuck did you mange that?” “Bitch I had a lot to say about McDonalds!”
  • One teacher came in and was like “I don’t feel like helping with homework but does anyone wanna learn how to hack a computer?”
  • Someone got caught pouring water out the window but when the teacher looked to see why she saw the youngest of the goats™ standing under the window with it’s mouth open waiting for more
  • One time the teacher wouldn’t let me go to the bathroom and after I asked for like the 5th time he said “It can’t be that important!” so I just pulled a pad out of my backpack and silently sat it on my desk while glaring at him and this 40 year old man looked like he was about to pass out and he finally let me go
  • I remember our final detention of senior year we were told that if we skip it we can’t graduate so everyone went into that room with a ridiculously nostalgic attitude and one guy finally stole the skull off the skeleton and we fucking tossed it around the entire time while singing and blatantly ignoring the teacher’s complaining lmao
  • I know there’s more but it’s 7am and this is long so all in all like…I do not miss high school but some memories are bearable lmao
The Last Unicorn (1982) starters.
  • ❛  I dislike the feel of these woods.  ❜
  • ❛  Unicorns? I thought they only existed in fairytales.  ❜
  • ❛  This is a forest like any other. Isn’t it ?  ❜
  • ❛  Let’s turn around. Hunt somewhere else.  ❜
  • ❛  This is no world for you.  ❜
  • ❛  Good luck to you, for you are the last.  ❜
  • ❛  What do men know ?  ❜
  • ❛  We are as old as the sky, old as the moon.  ❜
  • ❛  We can be hunted, we can be trapped, we can even be killed but we do not vanish !  ❜
  • ❛  Have you traveled very far ?  ❜
  • ❛  Be a little respectful, do you know who I am ?  ❜
  • ❛  Your name is a golden bell, hung in my heart.  ❜
  • ❛  I would break my body to pieces to call you once by your name.  ❜
  • ❛  In all your wanderings, have you seen others like me ?  ❜
  • ❛  Have you seen the others? Where have they gone? Tell me which way I must go to find them.  ❜
  • ❛  No, no, listen ! Don’t listen to me, listen !  ❜
  • ❛  You can find the others if you are brave.  ❜
  • ❛  What if they’re waiting for me ? In need of my help ?  ❜
  • ❛  Well hello there little one !  ❜
  • ❛  And just who might you belong to ? a pretty little thing like you ?  ❜
  • ❛  In my heart I carry such a heavy load.  ❜
  • ❛  And here I thought I’d seen the last of them !  ❜
  • ❛  I know you. If I were blind I would know what you are.  ❜
  • ❛  You wouldn’t have heard of me.  ❜
  • ❛  It’s not much of a job for a real magician, but I’ve had worse.  ❜
  • ❛  You’re mine. If you kill me, you’re still mine.  ❜
  • ❛  Your death sits in that cage and she hears you.  ❜
  • ❛  She’ll kill me one day or another, but she will remember forever that I caught her, that I held her prisoner. So there’s my immortality.  ❜
  • ❛  You were out on the road hunting for your own death !  ❜
  • ❛  He’ll not have you ! You belong to me.  ❜
  • ❛  We are two sides of the same magic.  ❜
  • ❛  You are safer here. You should thank me for protecting you.  ❜
  • ❛  There has never been a spell on me before.  ❜
  • ❛  It’s a very rare person who is taken for what he truly is.  ❜
  • ❛  Will you help me ?  ❜
  • ❛  You’re my last chance.  ❜
  • ❛  Can you truly set me free ?  ❜
  • ❛  I asked him a riddle and it always takes that lout all night to solve riddles.  ❜
  • ❛  the spell was wrong but there was true magic in it ! try again.  ❜
  • ❛  My dear you deserve the services of a great wizard but I’m afraid you’ll have to be glad of the aide of a second rate pickpocket.  ❜
  • ❛  Okay, (name), I give up. Why is a raven like a writing desk ?  ❜
  • ❛  She’ll kill you if you set her free !  ❜
  • ❛  Don’t look back, and don’t run.  ❜
  • ❛  You must never run from anything immortal, it attracts their attention.  ❜
  • ❛  She chose her death long ago. It was the fate she wanted.  ❜
  • ❛  You have no regrets as I do ?  ❜
  • ❛  I’ve never seen anyone like you. Not while I was awake, anyway.  ❜
  • ❛  I’m going where they are, to learn whatever they know.  ❜
  • ❛  Take me with you ! for luck, for laughs, for the unknown.  ❜
  • ❛  You could never have granted my true wish.  ❜
  • ❛  I cannot turn you into something you are not.  ❜
  • ❛  Hide yourself ! We’ll find each other later.  ❜
  • ❛  Mind your heads now, it’s raining ninnies !  ❜
  • ❛  Put me down you fool !  ❜
  • ❛  I don’t like the look of him.  ❜
  • ❛  That’s only (name)’s way, but she has a good heart.  ❜
  • ❛  This is not happening.  ❜
  • ❛  We’ll both be gentlemen of leisure in a months time.  ❜
  • ❛  Oh, I love you.  ❜
  • ❛  She shall never have you !  ❜
  • ❛  We will perish together.  ❜
  • ❛  Did you see me ? Were you watching ?  ❜
  • ❛  Did you see what I made ?  ❜
  • ❛  It’s gone now, but I had it !  ❜
  • ❛  Where have you been ? Where have you been ! ?  ❜
  • ❛  Where were you when I was new ?  ❜
  • ❛  How dare you come to me now when I am this !  ❜
  • ❛  It’s alright, I forgive you.  ❜
  • ❛  You can’t come with us ! we’re on a quest !  ❜
  • ❛  Well, you’re going the wrong way.  ❜
  • ❛  You have all the power you need if you dare to look for it.  ❜
  • ❛  What have you done ! ?  ❜
  • ❛  The power will come to me whenever I need it, and one day! One day it will come to me when I call !  ❜
  • ❛  You are an idiot !  ❜
  • ❛  Don’t ! Don’t you hurt yourself !  ❜
  • ❛  I can feel this body dying all around me !  ❜
  • ❛  You are losing my interest, and that is very dangerous.  ❜
  • ❛  I will keep nothing near me that does not make me happy.  ❜
  • ❛  How would you know ?  ❜
  • ❛  Well, just look at you !  ❜
  • ❛  Come on, I’ll write you a reference.  ❜
  • ❛  You have let your doom in by the front door !  ❜
  • ❛  What are you looking at ?  ❜
  • ❛  What is the matter with your eyes ?  ❜
  • ❛  You may come and go as you please.  ❜
  • ❛  My secrets guard themselves, may yours do the same.  ❜
  • ❛  Please, let me help you. What can I do for you ?  ❜
  • ❛  And then she looked at me and I was sorry I had killed the thing.  ❜
  • ❛  For her sake I’ve become a hero but my great deeds mean nothing to her !  ❜
  • ❛  I wish to be whatever she has most need of.  ❜
  • ❛  You are cruel to him.  ❜
  • ❛  He only wishes you to think of him.  ❜
  • ❛  Who am I ? Why am I here ?  ❜
  • ❛  I knew a moment ago, but I have forgotten.  ❜
  • ❛  I was innocent and wise and full of pain.  ❜
  • ❛  Now that I’m a woman, everything has changed.  ❜
  • ❛  Why won’t you help me ? Why must you always speak in riddles ?  ❜
  • ❛  I would tell you what you want to know if I could.  ❜
  • ❛  I am always dreaming, even when I am awake. It is never finished.  ❜
  • ❛  I would court you with more grace if I knew how.  ❜
  • ❛  Drown out my dreams. Keep me from remembering whatever wants me to remember it.  ❜
  • ❛  Words are always getting in my way.  ❜
  • ❛  That’s all I have to tell you. That’s all I’ve got to say.  ❜
  • ❛  I’m not a man of poetry. Music isn’t one with me.  ❜
  • ❛  As if I didn’t have enough troubles.  ❜
  • ❛  Well of course you’re of noble birth, anyone could see that.  ❜
  • ❛  Love is slowing you down, my lady.  ❜
  • ❛  It was pleasant enough at first, but it died quickly.  ❜
  • ❛  There is nothing of yours that I desire.  ❜
  • ❛  There is no movement of yours that has not betrayed you.  ❜
  • ❛  I like to watch them. They fill me with joy.  ❜
  • ❛  The first time I felt it, I thought I was going to die.  ❜
  • ❛  Do you dare still pretend to be human ?  ❜
  • ❛  It makes no difference. The end will be the same. I can wait.  ❜
  • ❛  Shut up you pretentious kneecap !  ❜
  • ❛  How would you like a punch in the eye ?  ❜
  • ❛  It’s so nice to have someone to play with.  ❜
  • ❛  Try me tomorrow. Maybe I’ll tell you tomorrow.  ❜
  • ❛  Give it to me if you don’t want it but don’t throw it away !  ❜
  • ❛  Give me the wine !  ❜
  • ❛  You would have gone without me ?  ❜
  • ❛  No name you could give her would surprise or frighten me.  ❜
  • ❛  I love whom I love.  ❜
  • ❛  I will go no further.  ❜
  • ❛  Everything dies. I want to die when you die.  ❜
  • ❛  Yes, that is my wish.  ❜
  • ❛  I am a hero, and heroes know that things must happen when it is time for them to happen.  ❜
  • ❛  A quest may not simply be abandoned.  ❜
  • ❛  A happy ending cannot come in the middle of the story.  ❜
  • ❛  What if there isn’t a happy ending at all ?  ❜
  • ❛  There are no happy endings, because nothing ends.  ❜
  • ❛  Do something ! You have the power ! I will kill you if you don’t do something !  ❜
  • ❛  That’s what heroes are for.  ❜
  • ❛  I’ve never had any friends before.  ❜
  • ❛  Men don’t always know when they’re happy.  ❜
  • ❛  I’m sorry. I have done you evil and I cannot undo it.  ❜
  • ❛  No sorrow will live in me as long as that joy.  ❜
a love spell, or something like it

inspired by a post sara reblogged (this one, specifically) and the resulting conversation about different love spells, where she suggested i write the fic. i said no, go away, it’s late. then i stayed up and wrote the fic.

This doesn’t make any sense.

Though they’d never admit it—Dean especially would never admit it—they’re practically witches themselves at this point. Sam isn’t deluded enough to think otherwise. He has a fair share of spells up his sleeve that he knows by heart by now, a few more he’s working on remembering, and some he still struggles with the incantation, but at the end of the day they frequently speak Latin and throw herbs into flames, so, logically, they’re witches, or close enough to it.

And it’s because of this (and his own unfortunate experience that no one must ever speak of again, thanks) that Sam knows a love spell when he sees one.

Keep reading

A dog person - Young!Sirius x Reader

Warnings : nope, maybe the GIF that personally makes me weak

Words : 2.8k

Request : yes

Note : it’s the imagine that I wrote a few days ago and that was deleted somehow, I’m sharing it again now. I know some people had the same request but anywayyyyy (thank you to the ppl who told me to post it again btw❣️). I just imagined a Patronus for Pettigrew, don’t mind it if it bothers you. I loved this request and got a bit carried away, it was just so damn cute.


Originally posted by bentbarnes


Even at Hogwarts everybody hated monday mornings, as they symbolized the end of the weekend, the return in class and especially, implied a lot of exhaustion. In fact, everybody except the 6th years, because to them Monday morning meant Defense Against the Dark Arts. Here you were, at your usual seat next to the wall on the first row. The classroom 3C had probably the biggest windows out of all the Turris Magnus, unfortunately you were too short to observe the view -everybody was- but you still tried to take a look everytime. You were on tip-toes, taking advantage of the fact that your teacher had not yet arrived to make another attempt.


« You know Y/N, I really enjoy the view you’re offering me when you stand up like this in front of me, but I think you should just sit down as our dear Professor is here. » whispered Sirius behind you. Your cheeks turner red as you did what he said, sighing in exasperation and trying to focus on the tall man standing in front of the class. Sirius knew his little seduction game made you feel a bit flustered and that was exactly why he liked doing it so much, he didn’t want you to be uncomfortable, he was only joking and you knew it. Out of the four Marauders, you spent most of your time with him or Remus, who actually introduced you to the others after meeting you at the library.


« Today I will try, and please notice that I said try, to teach you something that I know most of you have been waiting for. » said your teacher solanemly, holding his hands together behind his back. « The majority of witches and wizards are not able to produce it for it requires patience, concentration and determination. You probably guessed it already, I am talking about the Patronus charm, one of the most powerful defensive charms that exist.»


Immediatly, everybody started to whisper enthousiasticly to their neighbors, and even Lily who usually was the definition of the model student seemed hysteric. You smiled when you saw her, her dazzling hair flying in the air while she turned around towards the boys, already beginning to discuss on the shape their patronus would take. James had already managed to produce one and it was a deer just like his animagus. He could be turbulent, sometimes even insolent, but nobody could deny that he was an incredibly talented wizard just like Remus who was sitting next to him. Strangely, he stayed away from the general euphoria which spread in the class, playing almost nervously with his hands. You frowned, ready to ask him what was going on when your teacher knocked two times on the desk with his fists. The noises stopped and everybody looked at him once again.


« To produce a Patronus, it is necessary to concentrate on your most beautiful memory, and only this one. Find the memory that warms your heart the most and say clearly, wand in hand : expecto patronum. » Suddenly, a silver eagle flew from his hand and in the classroom. It was both beautiful and captivating. « This requires training, today we shall satisfy us with approaching the theoretical side of it and in the next class, I hope that you will be ready. Just know that it is difficult to obtain a corporeal patronus, and that its purpose is not to be beautiful, but to protect you from Dementors. Whether it is a rat, cat or lion, its power will be the same : the partonus is a shield, a messenger and a protector. »


He kept speaking during the whole following hour, adding that even if the animal shape the Patronus took did not define its strenght, it could mean something important for the wizard. Leaving the class everybody had only an idea in head : discover what their patronus was. The four boys, Lily and you had mutually decided to train together by the lake this afternoon. But right now you were going to eat, Sirius and James led the group speaking loudly and walking way too fast. Behind and standing by your side, Lily seemed to explain to Peter the details he had not understood. You left them silently to join Remus who walked at the back, alone, head low and dragging his feet. He raised his head when he saw you were waiting for him and turned the gentle smile you were giving him back to you. Interlacing your arm in his, you jumped at the opportunity to be alone with him to ask him what was wrong. Remus sighed, he seemed embarrassed and you strated to worry. He looked around to be sure no one was listening and then he bent a little towards you.


« I’m afraid my corporeal Patronus gives too much away, if you know what I mean. I already tried with James and it almost worked, and I swear I saw a long hairy tail before the light went off. » He whispered, biting his lip « With you guys it doesn’t matter, but if anyone else sees it… » He didn’t finish his sentence but you knew what he meant. Remus had always suffered because of his lycantropia, his parents and him had a nomadic life before he came to Hogwarts thanks to Dumbledore. Everytime someone started to be suspicious, they left and the little Remus never got to make friends. Even now that he had friends, really good ones, he was still afraid someone would found out. Taking his hand in yours, you squeezed it gently so he knew he wasn’t alone and you were here for him.


« We can practice alone another day if you want to be sure, you don’t have to do it today if you don’t want to. »

« I think that’s a good idea, thank you Y/N. »



Around 4pm, you sat in the green grass which lined the lake, between Sirius and Peter who seemed strangely concentrated into tearing away the petals of a flower one by one. You turned around towards Sirius who was already looking at you. You felt your cheeks burn a little when he did not look away which made him laugh, revealing his white teeth and his dimples.  He was a handsome young man, really, and you never knew if you just found him attracive or if it was something more. Anyway, you came back to reality when James showed up, back from his Quidditch session. A proud smile could be seen on his face as per usual, and it grew even bigger when a bunch of Gryffindor girls passing by stared at him like he was a piece of art, or a piece of meat. It always made Sirius giggle but Lily just rolled her eyes every single time.


« Did you mess your hair up on purpose again just so you can look like some Quidditch rock star ? » suggested Remus, looking quite amused. 

« You’ll be authorized to criticize my hair when your furry little problem will be solved, Moony chéri. » teased James, winking before he spoke again while turning around « Let’s get started folks, why don’t we let the Lilliputian try first. »


Eveybody laughed, James flirting with Lily was the funniest thing ever, especially when he came up with these strange nicknames but you had to admit that for once it wasn’t so bad. She stood up, pointing her wand towards him which caused him to slightly move to the side.


« In fact I’m two months older than you Potter, show me some respect. » Remus, Peter and Sirius giggled while James seemed outraged, but before he could come back with anything Lily exclaimed, her wand pointing to the sky « Expecto patronum ! »


You held your breath just like the others while slowly but very clearly, from the tip of her wand, a bright silvery light started to burst before fading out. She tried again multiple times with James giving her advices and finally, a tall and gracious doe was running in the air, following the rythm of Lily’s laugh. Her green eyes were wide opened, she seemed proud and happier than ever. You all applauded, Peter even took a bow.


« It’s strange, isn’t it ? Your patronus is a doe and Potter’s one is a deer. If it isn’t a sign, I don’t know what it is. » teased Sirius, winking to Lily. Her cheeks turned bright red before she exlaimed « Simple coincidence, that won’t make me go out with you any sooner Potter. »


Finally you formed little groups, James and Lily stayed together, Sirius was with Peter and Remus with you. This way, the others didn’t pay attention to the fact that Moony wasn’t really trying to practice and he was pleased about it. You tried to remember all the informations your teacher gave you this morning, and took a deep breath. You hoped it would work but as Lily said again and again, it was a difficult spell and it was normal if you didn’t succeed on your first tries. For what felt like an hour you persisted, repeating the two little words again and again, sometimes managing to produce a little shiny light at the end of your wand. But no animal, nothing. Frustrated you sighed noisily, which caught the attention of Remus, Sirius and Peter. The two others seemed too busy arguing about who-knows-what, and anyway they did not really need to practice anymore. Seeing your disappointment, Sirius smiled softly before suggesting to the boys to train together and that he would help you. After all if that did not work so well that way, you could try.


« I can’t do it either, you know. Maybe it’s because you distract me. » he suggested, teasing you once more with a grin on his face.

« That’s not funny Sirius. » you whined, a pout on your lips.


He looked at them for a bit too long before coming back at your eyes. Finally he stood behind you, his chest pressed against your back. You were thankful he was behind, at least he couldn’t see your burning cheeks but it wasn’t finished yet because you could now feel his strong hand taking yours, holding your wand with you while the other one was placed on your hip. Your heart was racing and you were probably shaking too because he laughed soflty, speaking soflty.


« Maybe you’re not thinking about your happiest memory. Close you eyes, the first one to come to your mind is probably the good one, focus on it. »


Even if his body pressed against yours and his breath crashing on the thin skin of your neck did not help you at all, his soft and low voice was relaxing and you now thought of nothing else. You no longer heard the sound of the wind in the trees, nor the murmur of the water of the lake, you did not see your friends staring at you a little farther : it was his voice and his body near you that occupied all your mind. You closed your eyes as he had suggested, and with trembling lips you pronounced the two words « Expecto patronum. » You opened your eyes slowly, just in time to see a magnificent light spraying out, more powerful than what you had managed to do until then. It grew larger, Sirius’s hand still held yours and guided the movements of your wand.
After a few seconds, you saw it. In front of you stood a brilliant, tall and perfectly formed dog. But it was not a common dog, you had seen this one several times already and you recognized it immediately. You understood that Sirius did too when you felt his fingers release your hand smoothly and his body move back slowly. Your concentration broke and the big dog disappeared. You did not dare to turn around, both shocked and mute, because you finally knew what your patronus was. And it was him. It was Padfoot.



You stood there, sitting on your bed without knowing what to do or even what to think. After the events of the afternoon you quickly ran away, stammering that you did not feel well and that you were going to rest. But everyone had seen the same thing as you, and everyone knew that your patronus was none other than Sirius Black himself, or at least his animagus form. You tried to convince yourself that it was just a simple dog, but you knew what you saw. Maybe it didn’t mean anything at all, maybe it did. It probably did. Sirius and you had been friends for years and even though he liked to tease you all day long, it had never been more than a platonic relationship. As you kept thinking about this, images started to come to your mind. The day you met, how funny you found him, yet annoying. The first time you sat together in class, and how you spent the hour drawing stupid things on each other’s books. That time in 4th year when he punched a guy who insulted you, and definitely got a detention for it. When one of his pranks hurt you and he brought you chocolate and flowers to make it up. The time he hugged you so tight after Gryffindor won the house cup that you thought he was going to choke you. Maybe he wasn’t just a friend after all, and it took you a couple of years and a patronus to realize it. A knock on your door made you lift your head up, the person did not let you any time to answer and entered the room.


« Can I come in ? » asked the black haired boy.
« A bit too late to ask, isn’t it ? »


Sirius did not answer, he just closed the door leaving you both alone in the dorm. He sat next to you, your knees barely touching, but not a word was said. You looked at the floor for a few seconds before you saw him turning his head to you from the corner of your eye. Slowly, you looked at him too, your heart skipping a beat when you met his dark grey eyes.


« Why did you leave earlier ? You missed something, we learnt that Peter’s patronus is a mole. »
« You know why I left. » you said, smiling slightly at the end.
« You don’t have to be embarassed about it. » he shrugged « But I have to admit that I thought it would be something else. »
« Like what ? »
« A penguin. »


You scoffed, clearly not especting that answer. Sirius looked at you curiously, he didn’t seem to understand why you were chuckling but he still smiled when he heard your laugh.


« What ? They’re cute and funny, everyone likes penguins. » he smirked.
« Nope, you’re probably the only person to fancy penguins that much. »
« Well I don’t try to hide it. You shouldn’t either. »


His last words were whispered in your ear before he placed a soft kiss on your shoulder. You knew what he meant, and you couldn’t act as if the butterflies flying in your stomach weren’t here. He bent down to give you another kiss, on the cheek this time, but the weight of his body made you both fall back on the bed. You laughed as he found himself lying on top of you and for the first time since you met him, you saw a light shade of red on his cheeks. You stayed like this before he kissed your forehead, and then your nose. You smiled and he looked at your lips, and back at your eyes again. Your hands made their way to the back of his neck as he brushed your lips with his own, without ever pressing them together. Your heartbeating probably echoed throughout the entire room, or maybe it was his own. He smirked again when he saw the look full of frustration and desire you gave him, biting his lip and kissing the corner of your lips and then your cheek, before whispering in your ear again.

« I always knew you were a dog person. »

And after that he finally pressed his lips against yours, tenderly, as if you were the most precious thing in the world.

YOI Fan Rec Friday

Hey everyone!! Sorry for uploading this so late, I’ve had a really busy day! Thank you for all your recs this week, I couldn’t include them all so if your rec isn’t on this post it will most likely be on next week’s list :)

Rec’d by anonymous:
over and over by Ceta, Teen, 24k
Victor meets Yuuri in a bathroom. They hit it off from there.

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Rec’d by @ria-channn :
The blood in our veins by Ria_channn, Gen, 1.1k (WIP)
When Victor Nikiforov, first prince of St. Petersburg sneaked out with his personal attendant and best friend out of the palace to attend a commoners’ party, he doesn’t expect to get swept off of his feet by a drunk Japanese man.

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Rec’d by anonymous:
The Devil Wears Gucci by Multiple_Universes, Mature, 23k (WIP)
Christophe Giacometti watched the new interviewee walk out of Victor’s office. Everything about him was wrong from the clothes and the haircut to his general attitude and walk. At the same time there was something naïve about him and Chris was prepared to bet that he’d just graduated from college. “Who is that sad little person?” he asked Victor. “Are we doing a before and after piece I don’t know about?”

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Rec’d by @fisukisuki :
Fire series by IllyasJames, M-E, 9.7k
College the time to have fun and be wild. At least that is Phichit’s intention. So being paired with a roommate who rather stays in was not what he had thought. Then again he is a minor, so having one that doesn’t party did mean he couldn’t get drunk either. So when he finds out that Yuuri does know how to party you can’t blame him for dragging him to a party off campus. Maybe he should have been more adamant in asking why Yuuri never drank before.

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Rec’d by anonymous and anonymous:
To Boldly Go by xylophones, Teen, 29k
A year in the life of badass science officer Yuuri Katsuki, Captain Viktor “Team Mom” Nikiforov, and simultaneously the best crew and worst crew in Starfleet history.

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Rec’d by anonymous:
Golden Sun and Midnight Moon by DiamondWinters, Gen, 9.5k (WIP)
Golden Sun Café opened early every day, 5am to be exact. The owner, one Victor Nikiforov was an early riser. Always up with the sun, rain or shine. He’d have freshly ground coffee pipping hot and ready to go the moment those doors opened.Yuuri Katsuki owns a nightclub called the Midnight Moon and typically sleeps all day, just to work all night. Save for the one morning when he needs a little pick-me-up to take care of some business needs during business hours.

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Rec’d by anonymous and anonymous:
Vintage Romance for Modern Lovers by Pickitup, Explicit, 5.6k
Yuri wants to seduce Victor but has no idea how so turns to the internet for guidance. Shenanigans ensue.

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Rec’d by @paxohana :
Say You’ll Never Let Me Go by Clarinda0110, Gen, 6.5k
Yuuri’s a dime a dozen artist, who had never sold a single piece of his work. In a last ditch effort to make it, Yuuri creates a statue out of marble. A vision of a man that has come to Yuuri in his dreams. He calls him Viktor. What happens when you’re handed your dream and you find out that you don’t want it.

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Rec’d by anonymous:
A simple misunderstanding by Cheyenne Agreste (Miraculous_Holder), Gen, 515 words
Yuuri knew very well how far into the gutter Phichit’s mind could get.
He decided to do something about it.

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Rec’d by anonymous:
Pancakes in the Morning by ajwolf, Teen, 5.3k
A year ago Yuuri drank 16 glasses of Champagne and ended up in bed with Viktor. He didn’t know what to call what they had now, but he should have known better then to fall in love with a playboy. A year ago Viktor fell in love with the shy wallflower who had asked him to dance and then seduced him on the pole. He should have told him he loved him.

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Rec’d by @artdefines06:
Fatum ad Momentum by maydei, Teen, 42k (WIP)
These are the moments that were lost in the rush for the Gold, and the things that were built within them. A re-evaluation of everything, from day one, the real day one. From, “Be my coach, Victor!!” And how trust, friendship, and love were built from there. Through Victor’s eyes, the story unfolds—the journey and experience of knowing Yuuri.

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Rec’d by anonymous:
no chandelier or spotlight (see you better lit) by drowsycyborg, Mature, 7k (WIP)
the one in Viktor is an actor and Yuuri is his no-name writer friend and they pretend to date.

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Rec’d by @omgkatsudonplease and anonymous:
The Suffering of Potya by kiaronna, Teen, 3.8k
At first, Potya believes he’s going to the veterinarian. This means a great deal of cursing from Yuri, as he tries to unsuccessfully lure Potya into the pet carrier. But as in all things, his human wins, and Yuri stalks out the door with carrier in hand, only twenty minutes late. Potya accepts his fate.
Soon, he realizes greater horrors are in store for him: Yuri’s dropped him off with the dopey poodle couple, the snuggly and curly bastards.

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Rec’d by anonymous:
Write Me In C Major by Thehobbem, Teen, 55k (WIP)
Victor Nikiforov has just won his fifth GP and Worlds gold medals and doesn’t know where to go from here - but falls in love with Katsuki Yuuri’s music at first hearing. Meanwhile, Yuuri is just trying to bounce back from (what he thinks is) a series of flops when his idol shows up with absurd requests.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
The Structure of Trust by Axlaida, Teen, 52k
After a mission went horribly wrong, ex-CIA agent Yuuri Katsuki needed a career change, and Private Security was recommended by his former boss, Celestino Cialdini. Now trained as a bodyguard, Yuuri wants to overcome his past mistake and planned to take on his first assignment with confidence.When he heard that famous figure skating coach Yakov Feltsman had received multiple threats over the coming months and was the client to his first assignment, he was thankful that he hadn’t been assigned to bodyguard the coach. Yet, he never imagined he’d be hired as Victor Nikiforov’s bodyguard.

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Rec’d by @fullmetalkarneval13 :
Hopelessly Devoted by nerdlife4eva, Mature, 13k
As Yuuri adjusts to life in Russia as Viktor continues to be excited about the progression of their relationship. When Buzzfeed requests their participation in a love-themed Valentine’s Day couples article, Victor jumps at the chance, dragging a reluctant (but loving) Yuuri along with him.

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Rec’d by anonymous and anonymous:
clean up on aisle five by alipiee, Gen, 5.3k
(In which Viktor finds any excuse he can to see the cute boy who works at the supermarket

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Rec’d by @hawsome :
Radiance by hawesome_writes_poorly, Gen, 5k
In Zemlya, many people can aspire to become students of magic. Stars were the greatest mystery of anything within the magical ranks. No longer did anyone go into magic hoping to grow a star like most magicians did thousands of years ago. It was easier to charge common-folk for potions and spells than to do the impossible. To even witches, the dream of growing a star was an impossible fairytale. But then Yuri fell from the heavens.

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Rec’d by anonymous:
For Anything by Harky21, Gen, 6.4k
The last year skating and living with Victor has felt like a dream to Yuuri. When Victor gets injured at the Grand Prix Finals, the two learn that love and support mean more than any medal ever could.

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Rec’d by anonymous:
Fragile, Handle With Care by vodkawrites, Teen, 17k (WIP)
The Pen Pal AU where Victor and Yuuri are pen pals but neither know who the other person really is that no one ever asked for.

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Rec’d by anonymous:
The Tsesarevich lives! by mtothedestiel, Explicit, 44k (WIP)
Victor is an orphan with no name, no family, and no memory of a time before he was ten years old. Could he really be the missing Nikiforov heir? An adventure across Europe with two conmen will lead him to the answer.

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Rec’d by anonymous:
Don’t fly past me, darling (I’ve been in love with you since the beginning) by sibylla, 7k (WIP)
A drunken night at Phichit’s leads to Yuuri’s photos splashed across the Daily Prophet. A month later, World Quidditch Champion Viktor Nikiforov, Yuuri’s idol and not-so-secret crush, shows up at Hogwarts. His reason? To coach Yuuri.

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Rec’d by @yuurioniceismylife :
Bound to Please by paxton1976, Mature, 40k (WIP)
By a small twist of Fate, Viktor and Yuuri meet in the Katsuki’s secondhand bookstore ‘Bound to Please’. Friendship comes fast as they offer something the other has never experienced before. As they strengthen and grow individually, they realize the other holds the pieces to make them whole.

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Rec’d by anonymous:
Canoe-dling: Not Prohibited by shereadsthestars, Mature, 12k
Yuuri is a seasoned counselor at Camp Okenoko who thought he was in for just another run of the mill, shenanigan filled summer with his friends. But he could not have been more wrong as he’s inevitably blindsided by the newest arrival. Enter one Viktor Nikiforov, who’s got the charms and good looks to woo whomever he pleases, and who’s interest is instantly peaked by none other than, Yuuri Katsuki.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
The Bulge (Don’t Bring a Weapon to a Public Beach) by nagoyadelay, Mature, 2.9k
Victor posts a photo of Yuuri on instagram without realizing that it’s somewhat suggestive. A thirsty skating fandom collectively loses their shit.

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Rec’d by @fiorelilyicecastle :
All things must die (except you and I) by Fiorelily, Mature, 24k (WIP)
Yuuri is used to being the creepy God of Death in the corner that no one dares talk to. He’s the harbinger to end all things and the world’s sorrow lands on his doorstep with every new shade. When the God of Spring, with his shining smile and silver-minted hair, tramples on the God of Death’s moment, the Unseen one’s wrath is terrible. Even worse is when Viktor creates an eternal spring of life to fly in the face of Yuuri’s entire purpose.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
The Selection by Galloping_Monroe, Mature, 70k (WIP)
Returning home on the tail end of an injury that ends his dancing career, Yuri Katsuki is trying to find his future again. As a Five, he knows his options are limited, but when he finds an invitation to Crown Prince Victor Nikiforov’s Selection, he is convinced by a friend to apply.He never thought he’d be Selected. When he is, he finds that his world is changed forever, and that the Crown Prince is not exactly what he’d expected.

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Rec’d by anonymous:
Kintsugi by witchbane, Explicit, 78k (WIP) ***Graphic depictions of violence (check the tags!)
Yuuri Katsuki is a hitman burdened with a debt he can never repay. His target: Viktor Nikiforov, next Pakhan to one of the most dangerous families in the Russian mafia.When the two are drawn into a treacherous alliance after a mission gone wrong, the bonds of love and loyalty to family and duty begin to unravel—even as they get more tangled up in each other.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
touch me, save my life by keskasi, Explicit, 6.9k (WIP)
A catalogue of first times.


Thank you for all your recs! ₍₍ (̨̡ ‾᷄♡‾᷅ )̧̢ ₎₎

The amazing “YOI Fan Rec Friday” banner was created by @omgkatsudonplease! I love them a lot, check out their blog!

It pisses me off so much how in the books Parvati and Lavender are just pidgeon-holed as ‘fashion obsessed hair heads’ for most of the books?

I mean, they might not be, but that was the impression pre-teen!me got from reading the books?

And now I’m all … okay, okay Hermione is awesome and we all know it.

But that doesn’t mean Lavender and Parvati are stupid just because they are geared differently from Hermione.

Fashion is hella hard and it requires a lot of memorization and attention to detail? And honestly Lavender and Parvati seem to be pretty nice people, in the little glimpses we get of them?

And all I want is Harry, following the Weasley without getting noticed (because he is used to sneaking around without disturbing people or attracting their attention, owing to the Dursley for that) and getting through the barrier and on the train.

And Lavender’s father helping him out with his baggage, jokingly asking him to keep an eye on his little girl? You seem like a good lad, my Lavender is the most beautiful girl, I need a strong gentleman to keep an eye out until she gets to Hogwarts and she starts to learn magic, so are you up to it?

Which is, of course, not true. Lavender has been going to self-defense lessons for years.

But the man noticed that this was a little kid with no parents around, looking all alone.

He thought 'hey, maybe I can stick him with my kid and they’ll make friends’

(btw, as Lavender is not, as far as I know, confirmed as pureblood in canon, I am going with half-blood or muggleborn for her, I’m thinking muggleborn for this specific AU?)

And Lavender is all “Daddy!” and apologizing to Harry for her dorky dad the moment he is out of the door.

And very nicely avoiding to comment on his clothes because she knows how it feels to be conscious of how your clothes look on you and it’s clear to her eyes that the way Harry is dressed he is probably from some orphanage or something because those are huge hand me downs.

(Because fuck you 90s, being fashion conscious doesn’t mean you are an elitist bitch).

And her parents are looking at her from the Platform and instead of asking about Harry’s life, not wanting to put him on the spot, Lavender waves to them and starts talking to Harry all “Those are my parents, they are so fascinated with the idea of magic and what I will learn at Hogwarts, I can’t wait to write to them all about the castle. My dad works in an office as an accountant and my mother has a column in –” Insert popular teen magazine for 90s UK.

And Harry is a bit overwhelmed but Lavender isn’t staring at him, she is not forcing him to talk and she looks nice.

So he kind of starts to tell her about the Dursely y'know, not like he did with Ron about how terrible they are, but about Vernon working for Grunnings (Lavender giggles and says 'Oh I am so sorry but it just sounds like a really silly name? Grunnings.’ and she tries to stretch the word a bit and Harry laughs a little and says yes, because it does sound silly the way she’s saying it, he just had never thought about it. 'I think it’s Swedish or something’ he offers and Lavenders nods sagely because yes, that makes sense) and how Petunia lives at home and reads all sort of gossipy papers, but not teen ones so sorry, he has never seen Lavender’s mom’s column.

And then the door to their compartment open and Parvati and Padma’s mother (I don’t know if they are pureblood but I’m headcanoning them as pureblood for this one) politely asks if there’s space for two more girls and when Lavender and Harry, after looking at each other, agree, Madam Patil levitates their trunks in (much to the amazement of Harry and Lavender) and settles them above and then guides her daughters in.

She introduces them, putting her hands on her shoulders, cautions her girls to not get wand-happy and wishes everyone a happy Hogwarts year and then leaves them there, going back to the Platform to join her husband and tell him how she left their daughters in the presence of Harry Potter.

“He looked dreadful. Hard up at the very least. I think you should look into his family situation. His clothes, at the very least, were terrible.” She murmurs, softly. “I am sure our girls will adopt him before the ride is over, so you should look forward to hearing about him in their letters.”

Her husband, who knows all about his beloved’s wife tendency to take people under her wing and adopt dangerous animals and fell in love with her for it (as well as for other qualities she has) because he’s very much the same, smiles fondly at her for the last bit and nods seriously at the first one.

It doesn’t matter who the boy is. Well it does, because Harry Potter of course, but it also doesn’t matter because no child should be mistreated.

Also it’s kind of strange that Harry Potter would look hard up, considering it’s common knowledge his parents left him handsomely provided for, full tuition to Hogwarts already paid.

Lavender gushes about how beautiful the Patil twins are, which immediately conquers Parvati, who gushes right back at Lavender’s sparkly accessories.

(Look, I might be wrong because this was the UK and not Italy, and if I am please let me know, but I was a child in the 90s, I bought italian teen magazines, sparkly shit taped to the cover under a plastic sleeve was the shit with fashionable people.)

Of course the moment Harry introduces himself, the Parvati twins try really hard not to goggle, though they do look at his scar, and then Parvati starts asking a storm of questions about where he grew up, whether the Harry Potter adventure books right about all he did since he was a child, if not that what did he do since beating You-Know-Who.

Harry 'Do you mean Voldemort?’ is greeted by soft gasps, right until Lavender asks 'Who?’ and then Parvati starts telling her all about the horrible Voldemort and how Harry and his parents saved them all from that monster.

Padma’s brain on the other hand is whirring and she is the one who reassures Harry that he will do just as fine as everybody else, when he says that.

Lavender and Parvati interrupt their convo because Lavender needs to assure to Harry that she’s muggleborn too, so they will have to learn together and he will be just on par with her, while Parvati explains that magical kids do get a leg up because some of them are allowed to practice at home but that really, she will make sure Harry is up to date with everything that is 'stupefy’ about the magical world.

At which point, Lavender asks what 'stupefy’ means and Padma explains that it’s the stunning spell, so don’t say it while pointing your wand at anyone and Parvati adds that it means, well, the most stunning things around.

(What? Wizarding children should have their own slang).

So by the point Hermione and Neville come by, the group as already made the first basic ties and while Neville is greeted and introduced by Padma and Parvati to the rest of the group, Hermione goes on fine right until she hears Harry’s name.

Padma and Parvati thinks it’s … whatever wizarding equivalent is there of gauche, that Hermione would throw that torrent of words at Harry and just … presume to know about him.

Lavender is just hella protective of her new friend.

Tightly knit protective of Harry formation is achieved in 0.2 seconds.

Neville, who has been around other pureblood children but has been condescended upon by most of them (not Padma and Parvati, given that Parvati will stick up for him later on, but still, it was a general tendency towards a potential squib) has found in Hermione one person who has been nice to him to the point of going out of her way to help him look for his embarrassing toad, so he gets protective of Hermione right back.

So basically, Parvati tells Hermione that she should not barrage people with informations like that, Neville replies timidly that Hermione didn’t mean anything bad, she just like quoting sources, Lavender tells Harry that he doesn’t have to worry, they’ll look up all that stuff when they get to Hogwarts, Hermione gets huffy because of course she didn’t mean anything bad, she just thought Harry would know about that stuff, Padma asks why Hermione would think that when Harry has been raised in the muggle world, Neville goggles at the news that Harry was raised in the muggle world.

It’s a mess.

And then Draco Malfoy arrives, because he’s been making the rounds of the train to look for Harry Potter (saying hi to family allies on the way).

I am not sure who says what to whom for most of the ‘chat’ but what I am sure of is that by the end of it, Neville and Hermione are going to be best friends forever and an united front against snobby purebloods, Padma has icily informed 'Mister Malfoy’ that she will be writing to her father about how low the raising standards of the Malfoy have fallen to produce Draco as a result, in response to a snipe Draco made about telling his father about the Patil twins and the rabble they are sticking with, Parvati has informed Crabbe and Goyle that she had not thought they were better than this but they definitely need to find themselves friends who don’t just treat them like dumb muscle and Lavender has vowed to herself that it doesn’t matter to her how cute Draco Malfoy is or how attractive his silver hair are she will spell his hair and robes to look like something an 80s hairband groupie would wear, just as soon as she learns the necessary spells.

To make it simple, battle lines have been drawn, metaphorical blood has been spilled on all sides and the Harry-Lavender-Parvati-Padma friendship has been set in stone.

Ron, if you are curious about him, found a compartment that had Seamus Finnigan and Dean Thomas in it and spent a really amazing first ride to Hogwarts.

They both made sure Dean knew how Gryffindor was the best house there ever is and then they explained Quidditch to him and became fascinated when Dean explained football (to americans: soccer) to them, especially once Dean started sketching out schemes and stuff.

There are too many players, but it looks like exactly the kind of team effort chasers have to put together only spread through eleven people and that’s just wow.

Beauty Magic

I want to talk a little bit about beauty magic.
WARNING: LONG POST AHEAD.

Originally posted by 365daysofwhitegirl

To make a long, sad story short, I always hated looking in the mirror because I hated what I saw. I thought I was an ugly fuck and I’d avoid the mirror as much as I could to not see who was staring back at me. When I came upon witchcraft, overtime, I realized that I was neglecting myself of being who I am, beautiful. 

I really love incorporating magic into what can make me feel beautiful and empowered and the way I do so is by using music beauty magic to aid me while I take showers, put on makeup, get dressed, etc. It has helped me see that I am truly beautiful for who I am with flaws and all, and I would like to share with you that you too are just as beautiful as I. We are beautiful.

Lets take this one step at a time: 

Morning Slumps to Magic Mornings

For me, this is one of the hardest parts of my day. I look like hell; makeup smeared, hair in knots and messy, clothes twisted, goop in eyes, morning breath, I mean, mornings are just not my thing and I have truly felt disgusting while working my way up to getting ready. While thinking to myself how gross I am, it made me less ambitious and made me less willing to look past what I found ugly. So as I brushed my teeth, took a shower, and got ready for my day I already had in mind how ugly I am by focusing on the negative. Thoughts are SO powerful and what we think is what we will see.

Beauty Magic Tip One:
Make a playlist called “Beauty” or a title that makes you feel empowered/beautiful. Have your coffee, eat your breakfast, whatever your routine is. Make your playlist and only put in songs that make you feel beautiful, music that makes you feel sexy, and strong. When you are finished with your morning routine, brush your teeth, and when you are done turn on your playlist. Take a shower while you have that playlist going and think about how beautiful you are and how strong your are.

BONUS:

  • If you sing the songs as you shampoo/condition/wash your body you are washing that beauty all over you and having it soak into your pores and washing off any negativity that lingers. You don’t have to sing, only do if you are comfortable with it. 
  • If you are a witch who can’t be open with your magic this is a great way to do beauty magic since you are alone (well, assuming, haha) in the shower. The most you have to worry about is having someone ask you to turn down the music or tell you to stop singing in case you are too loud.
  • If you are a spoonie witch this is a great way to do powerful magic because all you need is your thoughts and a playlist for your tools (and your voice if you choose to sing).

NOTES:

  • Based off of experience (I take hot ass showers) your electronics can get ruined in warm and humid places overtime if you have them in the bathroom with you, if so, make sure that you keep the bathroom well ventilated. 
  • I hate to admit it but sometimes while I am showering and I get really into a song and I dance a bit (fuck can’t believe I admitted it but moving past, haha) just please be careful. There have been a couple times where I have almost fallen, haha.

Beauty Magic Tip Two: 
While you get ready for your day (doing your hair, getting dressed, putting on your makeup) have your Beauty playlist going on and think about how beautiful you are and sexy you are. This can aid in getting you energized for the day ahead. 

BONUS: 

  • If you would like, while you get ready and listen to your encouraging music keep a rose quartz on/near you. This can add that little extra oompf. 
  • Again, a great way to incorporate magic if you are one who can’t be open with your craft. Who is going to tell you that you can’t listen to music and get ready at the same time? 
  • If you are a spoonie witch this is a great way to do powerful magic because all you need is your thoughts and a playlist for your tools (and your voice if you choose to sing). 

NOTES: 

  • This is just me personally but I can’t sing and put on makeup, that ends in the result of stabbing myself in the eye, haha. Be careful dearie! 
  • Rose quartz is one of many crystals that can be used to add a little extra loving energy / beauty magic. If you feel connected to another crystal that makes you feel beautiful use it! 
  • If you are a spoonie witch don’t overwhelm yourself. Chronic pain can sometimes get the better where you can’t get ready like you want for your day, and that’s okay. All you need are your positive thoughts and have your playlist going, you are beautiful.

Afternoon Blues to Swingin’ Days

Afternoons are where I feel the most sluggish because its the middle of the day and I am still busy doing my shit (cleaning, working, so forth). Afternoons can feel as if they drag on because you are waiting for the work/school day to be over with so you can go home and chill the fuck out. 

Beauty Magic Tip Three:  
While your are working/in school and you have a moment to yourself just think about how gorgeous you are. Keep a positive attitude about yourself because words and thoughts are powerful. 

BONUS:

  • You can bring along with you a self love spell jar/sigil/crystals along with you to work/school and keep it tucked away in your purse/wallet/backpack where ever as long as it is on your personally. 
  • All you need for this are your thoughts and positive vibes. Great for spoonie witches. 

NOTES: 

  • You can honestly do this whenever throughout the day since all you need are your thoughts. I just like doing this while in the middle of my day because it is a gentle reminder that I am beautiful no matter what I am doing.
  • Again, use any kind of crystal that resonates with you and beauty. 

Beauty Magic Tip Four: 
When the day is finally over and you are on your way home put on that playlist and sing your heart out. 

NOTES: 

  • If you are underage and aren’t driving yourself and have to ride the bus or carpool with others but still want to listen to your playlist on your way home, plug in your headphones. You don’t have to sing, singing is just a bonus. Listen to the music, let yourself feel beautiful. 
  • If you are driving yourself home, (this is just me personally) but I crank up the music and sing my ass off bring in the loving vibes after a long day. 

Gloomy Evenings to Enchanting Nights

I love nighttime. For me, it’s the time to really get connected with my being. The stars shine down on our hearts showing us that glitter of beauty that we each carry. We are all apart of the universe, that beauty is always within us as long as we are willing to open our eyes and see the natural beauty that we hold.

Beauty Magic Tip Five: 
Nighttime shower, read Beauty Magic Tip One along with notes and bonus section. This method can be applied to night and morning showers. 

Beauty Magic Tip Six: 
Magical baths allow us to soak in the properties of whatever kind of magic we are doing. Fill your bath up with water, add bubbles if you would like, and before you get in put on your Beauty playlist. Instead of singing, just listen. Let the words soak into your pores as the water will do. 

BONUS

  • You can add candles, herbs, essential oils, incenses, crystals around your bath that are related to beauty/loving energies. 
  • A great way for witches who can’t be open about their craft to do magic because you are taking a bath, you can say you just need to relax after a long day. 
  • Awesome for spoonie witches. You are soaking in the tub of your beauty and all you need is your thoughts and playlist going.  

NOTES:

  • If you are using essential oils/herbs make sure you DO YOUR RESEARCH. Don’t use anything that can be harmful for your body.
  • If you are using crystals make sure you DO YOUR RESEARCH. Don’t use any crystals that will dissolve in water, or can’t be near water, or that can make your water toxic in case accidents happen. 
  • It’s best that you don’t have your phone on your during this bath. Focus on yourself, on your beauty, and all the love you should be giving to yourself.
  • Personally, when I do this I don’t like to sing (and I love singing, haha). One, because it is nighttime and people in the house are asleep. Two, because I like to completely lose myself in the bath and relax. So keep the music low and peaceful so you can soak up all that beautiful energy.
  • Don’t have your electronic on the edge of the tub while your music is going. Personally, I use my phone (its an iPhone, all my music is there) and I don’t know about you but I am a clumsy fucker and I can’t afford losing that shit, haha. So keep your music going somewhere in ear shot (on the vanity or on a shelf in your bathroom, wherever water won’t damage your electronics.)

Beauty Magic Tip Seven:
I have acne issues and they bug the shit out of me but it doesn’t mean I’m not beautiful. So before I go to bed I wash my face (with lavender soap) and put on a special remedy I personally make to get rid of my acne. After your shower or before you go to bed, washing your face is a BIG helper to keep yourself beautiful. Keep a special towel that is specifically used for washing your face. Cleaning your face with some water and soap that is proper for your skin can do you wonders. While you wash your face think how powerful you are and how beautiful you are.

BONUS: 

  • If you have acne and are curious about my remedy watch this video to see how I do it.
  • You can have your Beauty playlist going on as you wash your face, adding that that extra oompf of gorgeous to your magic. 
  • This is a great way to incorporate magic if you are one who can’t be open with your craft. If someone asks what you are doing all you have to say is that you are taking care of yourself, which, well you are!

NOTES: 

  • If you are using the acne remedy of mine make sure that you are able to use it. It contains tea tree essential oil, not everyone can use that for their skin so please DO YOUR RESEARCH. I am not responsible for if something goes wrong because I am warning you now what works for me may not work for you, so test the waters and make sure you use ingredients that are safe for your skin.
  • While washing your face keep your electronics away from you if you are playing your Beauty playlist as you wash your face. This is just from personal experience but I am a messy fucker when it comes to washing my face. I wish I could be as graceful as those ladies on TV splashing water on my face with no effort, but yeah, this is real life and water gets EVERYWHERE. So, if you are like me, keep that in mind if you want your music playing. 
  • You don’t have to have music going, it’s optional. I just love music and incorporate it with anything magical I do. 
  • This can be overwhelming for spoonie witches (especially if you are one who has chronic pain in hands/wrists) because you are in motion washing your face so do what you can, if it is too painful to do then I recommend not doing this.

Beauty Magic Tip Eight: 
As you are laying in bed, right before you fall asleep say out loud, in your head, or whisper “I shine bright like my brothers and sisters of the night sky.” or “I am beautiful.” 

BONUS: 

  • Sleep with a rose quartz crystal to have the beauty of yourself always be with you, even in your dreams. 

NOTES: 

  • You can honestly say anything you’d like before you fall asleep, the two examples I provided are just ones that I say. Anything along the lines to you being beautiful will bring you beauty and charm. 
  • You don’t have to use rose quartz. If you connect to another crystal that provides you the same beautiful/loving energies use it!

____________________

NOTE
I wanted to save these for the very end. 

  • Beauty magic isn’t so that others will see you and think “Holy fuck, they are SO beautiful. I MUST HAVE THEM.” It isn’t like that. This kind of magic is about you seeing yourself as beautiful. 
  • Regarding your playlist, you can have ANY music that makes YOU feel beautiful. If the song makes you feel strong, sexy, beautiful, charming, empowered, whatever go ahead and use it! 

This is just a taste of music from my personal Beauty Playlist to help you get an idea: 
Wonderful Tonight by Eric Clapton, Sugar Magnolia by Grateful Dead, She Is Beautiful by Andrew W.K., Oh Pretty Woman by Roy Orbison, Lovingest Woman In Town by Albert King, Humans by The Scene Aesthetic, My Little Girl by The Jeff Healey Band, Cigarettes and Coffee by Otis Redding.

Like I said, you can use whatever kind of music you want as long as you feel beautiful. (Don’t be rude, please don’t give me any shit for my taste in music.)
____________________

So there we have it, a list of different ways you can incorporate beauty magic within your lives, and yes I know most of the tips have something to do with music but I am someone who incorporates music into everything I do magically. 

I hope you all enjoyed this post and if you use these tips, let me know how it works for you and tell me what you added to make it your personal style.

Stay beautiful darlin’.

Much Love,
Adrianna 😘  

Amarte Es Un Placer (End)

Summary: Soulmate AU. You and Draco share each mark, bruise, and marring on your skin. As life progresses and each mutual marking is worse, you grieve for your hurting soulmate. And he steps into your life when you least expect it.

Word Count: 2,123

Warnings: None.

“Amarte Es Un Placer” Masterlist

A/N: Ahhh here you go, guys! There will be an epilogue after this, something that finishes tying everything up. I hope you like it!


Originally posted by nellaey


Your arms were around him in the next second, your body making a protective cocoon around him. He cried into your chest, hands like claws, clutching onto your shoulders. You could feel his pain, every ounce of it, and it threatened to rip your chest apart.

And then it dawned on you. Draco thought you were going to leave him.

“I’m right here,” you heard yourself say. “I’m never going anywhere.”

Keep reading

Another 100 Random RP Starters

- does include some swearing; feel free to edit when sending in an ask to fit character’s speech

  • “No. No, no, no. Don’t you dare try to pin the blame on me.”
  • “Did you even bother to think about the consequences?”
  • “Listen here you useless paperclip!”
  • “Meerkats are murderous little bastards.”
  • “For the record, I hate everything.”
  • “Do you even remember me?”
  • “Did you know the guy who wrote Sherlock Holmes may have killed a man?”
  • “I’m going to join NASA and fling myself into the sun.”
  • “I hope you know what you’re getting into.”
  • “Please don’t. Just… don’t.”

Keep reading

Shakespeare (Part VII)

(Banner made by the incredibly talented @tiostyles)

Harry X Reader (AU)

In which Harry is a poetic frat boy who just so happens to be the TA for your new English class.

Read previous parts here.

Author’s note: Hi!! If you happen to see and spelling mistakes or grammatical errors, please do not hesitate to let me know!! Any and all feedback is appreciated, as always. I hope you enjoy!! We’re getting pretty close to the end. :(


Friday nights are for reading.

You’ve opened the window of your dorm room to let in a cool breeze that breaks through the suffocating warmth of the building’s heating system. You’re halfway through a copy of Wuthering Heights that you borrowed from Harry, curled up on top of your comforter and reading with the dim lights from outside. With each turn of a page, you find your thumb in a curved divet exactly the size of Harry’s thumb. You’ve learned in the past few weeks that he licks his fingers before turning pages.

A sharp knock comes at the door and makes you flinch. A glance at the clock shows that it’s twelve-thirty A.M. You stay put, flipping the page again and hoping whoever it is will think you’re asleep. But it comes again—harder, consecutive knocks that make you jerk into a sitting position.

The persistent banging continues and you groan, holding your place with a bookmark and sliding the book onto the desk beside you. You hop down off the bed, sliding your feet into a pair of slippers and padding across the room to open the door, where the knocking has finally stopped.

Keep reading

Rejuvenation Period (Or What Keith Calls Cuddling)

klance fanfic [keith and lance from voltron]

Summary: Lance and Keith are dating secretly, and after a hard day of training, Keith works up the courage to enter Lance’s bedroom. [wink wonk] 

Genre: smut [but jillian, that title sounds so fluffy, are you sure - ?] [yes. yes i’m sure.]

TW: internalized homophobia a wee bit

Keep reading

Memory Lane

A belated birthday gift for @destieldrabblesdaily! Have some Witch!Cas and accidental magic shenanigans :)

Sorry this didn’t get posted on your actual day of birth, life became VERY BUSY recently for some reason but HERE IT IS NOW.

AO3

“So, what does this do again?”

Dean frowned as he brushed his fingers along the dried-out tentacle from something that Castiel had hanging up along the wall in his work room, alongside several bundles of herbs and various other ingredients that Castiel used in his potions.

Castiel paused his chopping to glance over at his friend.

“It’s highly poisonous, and I would recommend not touching it.”

Dean made a small noise of surprise in the back of his throat and jerked his hand back.

“Jesus, really?”

“No, but please don’t touch it anyway. It’s very rare.”

Nonetheless, Dean rubbed his hand on the front of his jeans as he sat at the table across from Castiel, just in case.

“Not to rush you or anything, but are you about done?” Dean rested his chin in his hands as he watched Castiel begin scooping up the finely-chopped bits of fire beetle and gently poured them into a small vial. “I’ve been dying to try out that new burger place and I’m starving.”

“I have tea in the kitchen if you want something,” Castiel murmured, his concentration never wavering from his work.

“I said I’m hungry.” Dean flopped down into a pout, knowing how much it bugged Cas whenever he dropped his attitude to the age of a twelve-year-old. “You said we could go out to eat today, so here I am.”

Castiel let out a long sigh and wiped off his knife on a napkin.

“Yes. I did. I’m sorry.” He put a stopper in the vial and looked up, a pleading tension in his eyes. “Give me just a few more minutes to finish this. I didn’t realize I was going to have so many potion commissions this week, and I really need to get them completed.”

“Yeah, yeah, alright.” Dean stood up from the table and ruffled Castiel’s hair as he passed.

As much of a hard time as he gave his friend for being so busy now, Dean couldn’t help the swell of pride he felt whenever Castiel mentioned his small business. Trying to get it up and running had been an upward battle for the past two years and that was only after spending the seven years before that honing his craft and practising his magic. Dean had been there for every step of the way; he couldn’t be prouder of Castiel for finally succeeding.

Even if that meant they didn’t to get spend as much time together as Dean would like, anymore.

At least now Castiel didn’t have time to date anyone. Not that he had dated before his business began to boom.

And not that Dean cared.

Keep reading

Writing is Hard, Part 4: Dry Humping

Summary: Dean doesn’t understand the allure of dry humping.

Read Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Warning: Smut

Word Count: 3000ish

A/N: This is all written with love for fan fic. I’m teasing, not putting it down in any way. Hope you enjoy! XOXO


“Where does Sam think you are right now?”

Dean shrugs at you, hair dripping from the light rain that’s falling. “Can I come in?”

You head back for your chair, next to the table that holds your pizza, and leave the door open behind you. Dean follows, shrugging out of his jacket and shaking his head like a dog, though his hair is too short for it to do much good. “I told Sam I was coming to your room,” he says, a forced casual tone to his voice as he drops that bomb.

Keep reading

Imagine babysitting Groot with Peter...

Originally posted by nicolasprenger

Warnings: way too cute for human consumption, probably language

A/N: This was a request by @grootiez. I hope you like it because I loved it. Definitely spurred more Groot ideas.

Tags: @bitch-m-fabulous , @thecupcakeconsumer, @courtneychicken

You sat reading aloud next to the tiny planted Groot. He had been growing well since sacrificing himself and you hoped he would talk soon. You never met full sized Groot but between the stories and how much time you spent sitting with Baby Groot, you were pretty sure you would have loved him. The group was supposed to be going into the city on the planet you just landed so that they could collect some general supplies and maybe intel. You hated going outside so you opted out and just gave Rocket a brief list in exchange for you staying with Groot. 

Keep reading

✧ ( F.R.I.E.N.D.S  SENTENCE  STARTERS.

warning:  adult language and mild sexual themes. change pronouns to your liking/as you see fit!

❛ Now that I’ve untangled you, how about you do something for me? ❜
❛ All right! I just don’t see why you like it so much! ❜
❛ Babe, if you know it through a wall, you know it too well. ❜
❛ I’m fine! Hey, I’m great! I’m just, I’m just proud of us. ❜
❛ I realize that you didn’t expect to walk in and see that, but… Let me explain, okay? ❜
❛ We weren’t doing anything!  ❜
❛ Well, maybe the next batch, we could all get some. ❜
❛ I’m sorry, it must be the pressure of entertaining. ❜
❛ How could you mess this up? It’s so easy. ❜
❛ If I wanted this cake to be a disaster, I would have baked it myself! ❜
❛ I know what you’re thinking! The resemblance is uncanny! ❜
❛ It’s the longest I’ve ever spent on a computer without looking at porn. ❜
❛ You just got to accept the fact that this is going to cost you a lot of money. ❜
❛ Dude, I don’t think you should be wearing that. ❜
❛ Oh, I see. Somebody’s afraid of a little competition with the ladies? ❜
❛ If you had to, what would you give up? Food or sex? ❜
❛ It’s perfect! It’s everything we’ve been looking for! ❜
❛ What? When have I ever touched myself in front of you guys? ❜
❛ Why don’t you sit down… get yourself comfortable… because I have a little surprise for you. ❜
❛ Please just…just pull yourself together okay? ❜
❛ We’re not a couple- we’re definitely not a couple. ❜
❛ What, I’m not good enough for you? ❜
❛ Wow, you, uh, you seem pretty insulted by that.. ❜
❛ We’re not gonna have this conversation again. ❜
❛ Oh, you are, you really do like big butts, don’t you? ❜
❛ Why can’t you be supportive? ❜
❛ You have always been jealous of me! ❜
❛ You want to know why you don’t want me to have the baby? ❜
❛ You have to have everything and I couldn’t have anything. ❜
❛ Wait a minute; you don’t think it was intentional? ❜
❛ So, does anybody have any ideas how to organize this?  ❜
❛ Uh, don’t you think that would be a little weird? ❜
❛ We were on a break! ❜
❛ For the last time, I don’t care what the computer says. ❜
❛ I’m kind of going through a dry spell, sex wise.. ❜
❛ I’m across the street, having sex right now. ❜
❛ Whoa—hey—wh-wh-what do you got there? What is that? ❜
❛ What? Are you afraid you’re gonna run out? ❜
❛ Any minute now, the police will be here. ❜
❛ Well, if you’re gonna get to know him then you’d better do it now. ❜
❛ Well, excuse me for trying to put a positive spin on a traffic jam! ❜
❛ If only there was something in your head to control the things you say! ❜
❛ You know what, ____? Why don’t you just put that on your answering machine! ❜
❛ Oh, I’m sorry, were you speaking to me or sleeping with someone else? ❜
❛ There is no right or wrong, here. ❜
❛ You just asked me whether I wanted to go to bed with you tonight! ❜
❛ You know how some people walk in a room and everybody takes notice? ❜
❛ It’s never taken me a week to get over a relationship. ❜
❛ It’s never taken you more than a shower to get over a relationship. ❜
❛ Why would you start again after chewing all that quitting gum? ❜
❛ I started using humor as a defense mechanism. ❜
❛ Uh, do you guys have plans for the weekend? ❜
❛ Now it’s not gonna make any sense! ❜
❛ It’s not the sweater. It’s what’s underneath the sweater that counts. ❜
❛ You’re so stupid, how are you not yet extinct? ❜
❛ I broke up with you because I was mad at you, not because I stopped loving you. ❜
❛ Why would you need to say “hi” to them? ❜
❛ I’m just going to wander around in the rain. ❜
❛ I just got us dates with two unbelievably cute nurses. ❜
❛ That’s kind of a masculine name, don’t you think? ❜
❛ “Don’t count on it.” Seems like it works to me. ❜
❛ I went to the park and let a bee sting me. ❜
❛ I’m really getting tired of always sneaking around all the time. ❜
❛ I don’t even feel like I know you any more.  ❜
❛ Whatever you say, I’ll believe you. ❜
❛ All right, I’m just going to ask you this one time. ❜
❛ I’m surprised you didn’t go home wearing your lunch! ❜
❛ Someday I’ll tell you about the time I stabbed a cop! ❜
❛ Look, we’re not just messing around!  ❜
❛ I’m so sorry that you had to find out this way. ❜
❛ You guys probably wanna get some hugs in too, huh? ❜
❛ You were worried about me? You didn’t know how I was going to react? ❜
❛ Do you really think the best reason to get married is because you’re sorry? ❜
❛ I was gonna ask you to marry me because I forgot to say hello to you last week. ❜
❛ I can’t talk you out of this. It’s a great life. ❜
❛ I just realized I can sleep with my eyes open. ❜
❛ I mean, didn’t you even run so fast you thought your legs were gonna fall off? ❜
❛ What did you do that bad that make dad cut you off? ❜
❛ I guess it makes sense, you know, having such a terrible childhood. ❜
❛ I had a terrible childhood and I don’t do porn. ❜
❛ I always thought having a heart attack was nature’s way of telling you to die! ❜
❛ I mean… you — you are going to die, but you’re not gonna die today. ❜
❛ I mean, if you’re not careful, you may not get married at all this year. ❜
❛ Can we come in yet? We’re dying out here! ❜
❛ I didn’t know it was a big secret. ❜
❛ Why is this woman leaving a message for you on my machine? ❜
❛ It’s a known fact that women love babies, all right? ❜
❛ I was doing great before I found out about you! ❜
❛ And it’s not like I didn’t try, but things got in the way! ❜
❛ I’ve been doing this for ten years and I haven’t gotten anywhere. ❜
❛ You know what we should do? We should do, like, a soap opera theme. ❜
❛ Do you know me or are you just really good at this game?  ❜
❛ What’s the worst that could happen? ❜
❛ How do you expect me to grow if you won’t let me blow? ❜
❛ Why must everybody watch me sleep? ❜
❛ Haven’t you ever gotten beat up before? ❜
❛ It’s such a shame you can’t see what finger I’m holding up. ❜
❛ I didn’t know what I was taking responsibility for! ❜
❛ When I walk outside naked, people throw garbage at me. ❜
❛ I would’ve thought it was the other way around. ❜
❛ I remember I cried the night you made that up. ❜

Shots Fired

Word Count: 2440

Pairing: FBI Agent Dean x Pharmacist Reader

Warnings: Language, Violence, Some Angst, Some Fluff

A/N: Written for @dancingalone21 ‘s funny quote challenge. My quote was: “That attitude right there. That’s why I always got the extra cookie.” Also written for @just-a-touch-of-sass-and-fandoms Shit My Patient’s Say challenge. I used a ton of quotes from that one. They’re all bolded. 

A/N 2: Unbeta’d and unedited. Probably a shit ton of mistakes. My bad.

A/N 3: Most/All of the stories in here aside from being robbed (at gunpoint anyway) have happened to me in my career. More than once. Fun times. 


You left your 12 and a half hour shift at the pharmacy over 30 minutes late. Some asshole had decided to wait until 9:00 to come get their prescription filled that they needed right that second. Of course, they’d had the prescription in their hand for over three weeks. Not that you could turn them down. Your district manager would surely find out and chew your ass out for it the next day.

Grabbing your bags and sliding out of your car you realized Dean wasn’t home yet either. Your husband’s Impala was nowhere to be seen. Ever since he’d taken a job as an FBI agent, he’d been working crazy hours too. The two of you barely saw each other anymore and it sucked. Sighing, you trudged into the house and dropped your stuff, kicking off your shoes. You made your way into the kitchen, grabbing all the junk food you could find and a bottle of Captain Morgan before throwing yourself in a heap on the couch.

You were mindlessly watching TV when Dean came home, discarding his jacket and tie before he lifted your legs and sat down, resting your legs in his lap. “Rough day?”

“Whatever gave you that idea?”

“The completely eaten bag of chips, the leftover ketchup on the plate where you probably had a frozen cheeseburger, oh and the uh…half drunk bottle of Captain Morgan that was totally full yesterday.” Dean pointed to the bottle in your hand and you rolled your eyes, sarcastically scoffing into the air.

“Good job, detective.

Keep reading

7

Darling

Location: 4328, boul. St-Laurent, Montreal

Metro Station: Mont Royal

End of April… marks the end of finals. School’s out!… Well only for about 3 days until I go to summer school. 

Nonetheless, gives me enough time to explore my city without any pressure from my academic responsibilities!

Today, my boyfriend and I were planning on having a lunch type date in the Mile end until our plans miserably failed when we realized our chosen restaurant wasn’t going to open for another 4 hours. We decided to hop on a random bus on the corner of the street since it was pouring like crazy and we didn’t feel like staying out in the rain. We got off a stop when we started feeling like we knew the neighbourhood and ended up in the Plateau… again. 

After finding a place to eat, we decided to walk around some new areas in the Plateau we hadn’t discovered yet. Although it was raining, breathing in fresh air was so refreshing considering we had been locked in our room the past 3 weeks trying to stuff 5 courses worth of information in our heads. 

I felt like I was in a European dramatic movie - walking in the rain with a little umbrella with my favourite person, discovering places with nothing else in mind. Queue the Parisienne music. 

We suddenly stumbled upon an exotic looking shop on the corner of a street. From the outside looking in, while we were dripping with water, we could see plants and wine and bright lights and greenery and comfortable couches and… coffee! Sold.

We went into the coffee shop and was immediately warmed with welcomes from the waiter. A coffee shop - but a different kind at that. The first thing that caught my eye was with no hesitation the lights on the ceiling. I don’t really know what the letters spell out, but they sure look aesthetically pleasing so I rolled with it.

The section next to the windows was very casual with the couches. There were mini candles decorating each table and plants flowing around every corner, making the space extra inviting - battling the coldness of the weather outside. As the Jazz music was playing in the background, we took a seat on the couches, avoiding the tables since we didn’t have laptops since we didn’t have school. Emphasis on the comfort!!! No school equals we can sit on the nice couches and relax. 

I saw students around me on their laptops still working very hard on their studies… accompanied with their glasses of wine instead of the usual latte. I liked it. I love coffee but i live for these different little details in shops. 

Let me explain the wine though, because it is a very important part of this “coffee shop”. It’s not really a “coffee shop”. It’s a hybrid. Half coffee shop, half bar. You heard that right. It’s also a bar. Order food, order alcohol, order coffee - sit at the huge circular bar for a nice glass of wine or beer or anything else, or sit on the couches like me and still order your usual. I got a chai latte this time so I tried to be a bit different than my regular latte. And it was delicious! One of the best I’ve ever had.

I felt like I was in a different country in this cafe. With decorations like mini instruments on the walls, to the candles on the tables, to the vintage looking decor, I also felt like I was in a Jazz club. Everything was so perfectly shaped together. 

I know I say I love all the cafes in Montreal - and I do, don’t get me wrong - but this place is really one of my favourites now. It made me feel like I’m in 1920s Paris and I lived for it. Next time, I’ll even dress for it.

Sometimes, your plans might go awry and your chosen restaurant will open only 4 hours later. However, sometimes… those moments are calls for better adventures and more exploration with improvisation. Let the rain guide you to beautiful shelters.

Let me help.

A/n: This was meant to be posted last week but I was on holiday and didn’t have any wifi, and I have only just got home, but I wrote an extra 200 words for this in that time so there’s that!

(Also unrelated but I’m overwhelmed af by all the stuff coming out of the Disney thingy, it’s so late in the UK and I need to sleep so I’m going to post this and then log tf out!)

If you’re not over 18 please don’t read.

Proof read by way of a text-speech device

Pairing: Bucky Barnes/Reader (Female)

Word count: 2174

Warnings: Smut. Swearing. Dirty talk? I’m not really sure if what I wrote counts but just in case… 

I would say use a condom but they did, and also go to the toilet after sex (I learnt that from smut!) but I kinda suggested Y/N did. Nothing graphic! Just can be interpreted that way.

Again I would like to apologise for the last line, it’s overly soppy I know but I’m keeping it anyway!

Summary: Not much plot, basically just Bucky helps Y/N do something about the lack of action in her life, of which he may be the cause…

Masterlist.


Here’s your problem. You are out of breath, your heart is racing, and a slight sweat is breaking out all over your skin, but you’ve not started working out yet. No, this is just your bodies usual reaction to being in the same room as Bucky. More specifically, a half naked, very flushed, making-stupidly-attractive-noises-every-time-he-pushes-the-weight-bar-back-up, Bucky.

Keep reading

Birthday Blues // Jeff Atkins

A/N: Honestly, I wrote this at 1am. 

Named after: The fact that I mentioned readers birthday so much. That and I was listening to the blues.


It was a Saturday. It was the day of the championship game for baseball. But most importantly, it was your birthday.


You had let this small fact take a back seat in weeks leading up to the game, you didn’t want to stress Jeff out. Your boyfriend was already spending more time with Clay to get tutoring for two more classes just to make sure he’d play. He’d exercise in the early morning before school, go to baseball practice after, study and do homework with the smaller boy, and then watch his previous games until it was time to repeat.

It had become a routine, and Jeff normally got like this a few days before his games. You’d grown accustomed to it, you would plan to walk to school or ride with your next door neighbor Alex Standall, pack a few extra protein bars and Gatorade to leave in his locker, as well as massage him during his film.

He was…distant but it was okay because he always felt so guilty after, he’d pamper you for the next week.

However, what your boyfriend failed to let you know, was that for the championship, this routine of his was starting two weeks before you expected it. So when you found yourself arriving at school by 3rd period, after waiting 20 minutes for your boyfriend to show up you were more than angry.

But you pushed it aside, silently forgiving your baseball player. You knew Jeff loved the sport he played. For the most part, it was the only thing he felt he was incredible at. So you slowly adjusted to this behavior for the week, eating lunch by yourself because Jeff didn’t initially tell you he was going to the athletic trainer during your lunch period. Nodding as he asked you if you could find another ride home because practice was running late. Walking when you realized all your friends had already left.

It was fine, you knew it wasn’t intentional or malicious, he just really wanted the game to go well. Scouts would be looking at him. More importantly, you knew that once these weeks finished you’d have him all to yourself, starting on your birthday.

You walked through the bleachers wearing Jeff’s home jersey, 30 minutes before the game started. You saved seats for his parents who had already wished you a happy birthday, your parents who were there to support your boyfriend, and your friends who had helped you survive these past two weeks.

You made three posters all with different puns and cheesy jokes that you were sure Jeff would love,
 ’#1 on the field AND in my heart’
 'No that is not Derek Jeter, it’s Jeff Atkins’

And your personal favorite,
  ‘Atkins, Homerun counter:__’

You brought a sharpie with you to the game and by the end of it, you had edited that poster at least four times. You screamed so loud during the game you barely had any voice left when the team won.

The student section, along with yourself rushed the field and you watched as your boyfriend and his teammates poured water all over their coach. You smiled, more proud of Jeff than ever. Your two weeks of relationship hell were over and you were going to spend the rest of this Saturday night celebrating him and your birthday.

When you finally got the opportunity to get to Jeff, waiting for his parents and your parents to go first so they could leave, you hugged him as tightly as you could you pecked his lips before asking, “Now what champ?”

He smiled at the abbreviation. He let go holding out a finger signaling he’d get back to you. He left, jogging over to his teammates and a few reporters. You waited. Waited as the captains talked to the reporters who covered the game, waited as he greeted the college scout with a firm handshake, waited as the team filed out.

Jeff was the first one on that field and the last one to leave the dugout. He had all of his stuff in his baseball bag, slung on one shoulder while he wrapped the other arm around your waist.

“We’re going to Bryce’s!” He said smiling as you reached his car.

“W-what?” You asked trying to keep it together.

“Bryce, you know Bryce, he’s throwing a party for the win! You asked, ‘now what’ so that’s what!” He replied placing his stuff in his trunk.

You couldn’t lie, it fucking hurt. He forgot. He forgot your birthday of all days. You understand, it was the championship but the last thing you wanted to do was get drunk with a bunch of rowdy jocks. You and Jeff did that almost every weekend. Before you could say anything, Jeff opened the door for you, kissing your cheek.

“Jeff…” you started your voice nearly breaking. But when he turned to you, with the world in his eyes, ecstatic he had just won, you couldn’t bring yourself to ruin it. So you swallowed the lump in your throat and blinked back your tears as you forced a smile on your face.

“Could you please take me home? I’m not feeling too well.” You said, barely managing to make it through your request.

He nods, rushing back over to the driver’s seat. He grabs your hand, rubbing circles on your skin all the way to your house. His grip tightens as he pulls into your driveway and finally looks over at you.

You avoid his gaze and move to get out.

“So no party?” He asks you.

“No thanks, but go and have fun okay? I’ll see you tomorrow!”

He furrows his eyebrows placing another kiss on your hand before letting you go.

“Thanks, baby girl, I’ll see you tomorrow!”

And with that, he drives off. Once he’s out of sight you finally let the tears stream down your face like they had wanted to for the past two weeks.

You decided not to call anyone to make other plans, you would much rather sulk in your own pity. You had a mix of texts come in through the night that you ignored. Most of them from friends wishing you a happy birthday, and a few from a very drunk Jeff who, for the life of him, couldn’t manage to spell out ‘I love you’. That night you cried yourself to sleep, upset and alone trying to rationalize your boyfriend’s actions.


You woke up early the next morning, making yourself breakfast and planning out your day to make up for the previous. You could have fun by yourself. You ignored whatever Jeff texted you when you got ready, putting on some of your favorite clothes instead. Sorting through looking for your sweatshirt, you heard a knock on your door.

You threw on a t-shirt instead, yelling out 'come in’, as you started to put your hair into a bun.

“Hey, you feeling better? I have the nastiest hangover, so it’s fine if you’re not, we’ll be miserable together” Jeff started.

And you shook your head slightly at first, then you gradually became angrier. You couldn’t care less if Jeff had a hangover. Throughout his whole drunk escapade, it didn’t even occur to him that you were sitting at home, by yourself, on your birthday. He had treated you like shit for two weeks, he didn’t just get to waltz back into your life as though it never happened.

“Your parents let me in on their way out. You weren’t answering my texts so I just thought-” he stopped himself as he watched your expression change.

“What’s wrong?” He asked gently.

“What’s wrong Jeff? What’s wrong? Are you fucking kidding me?” You questioned, raising your voice slightly.

You didn’t plan on getting angry so fast, he just was so oblivious to everything it pissed you off, royally.

Jeff was taken aback. His mouth dropped slightly as he tried to figure out where he went wrong.

“FIRST. You didn’t give me a ride to school with no notice! I had to fucking walk! I was late to class and now I have detention next weekend so thanks!” You stood, now pacing around your room as Jeff took a seat on your bed.

“Baby-” he tried to interrupt.

“I’m not done” You interjected.

You were so upset you missed the completely shocked expression on Jeff’s face. Everything he did wrong in the past two weeks was flooding in all at once.

“Then! You made me eat by myself at lunch when you didn’t tell me you weren’t going to be there!”

“Baby girl-”

“Don’t you dare 'baby girl’ me! Then! You made me walk home! …IT’S AN HOUR WALK JEFF!”

He stood to meet you in all your anger, approaching you slowly.

“You basically ignored me, FOR TWO WEEKS! For fuck sake, Clay saw you more than I did!”

You couldn’t help it. Everything was spiraling in your head and pouring out of your mouth. When Jeff reached you, his hands that normally felt so comforting betrayed him. You wanted nothing more than to scream and yell until he left until he felt the way that you did.

“Y/N, I’m sorry, okay? Please calm down-” he said in the most soothing voice he could figure.

Jeff was scared, to say the least. He had never seen you this angry before.

“CALM. DOWN? YOU’RE NOT SERIOUS!” You screamed back at him pushing against his chest to create some distance between the two of you.

As your voice grew louder, the tears came rolling in again. When they fell down your cheeks Jeff had to fight the urge to wipe them. He felt guilty, he was the sole reason you were so worked up.

“THEN TO TOP IT ALL OFF JEFFREY? YOU FORGOT MY BIRTHDAY!”

Jeff could have sworn he felt his heart stop. He knew he had been forgetting something, he just didn’t know it was you. He couldn’t even stutter out a response, he just stood there taking you in.

“I made three fucking posters for you! And I was there for you! Through all this BULLSHIT! I waited after the game! When you did all your interviews, and you met with all the scouts, and you were fucking around with the boys! I let you do whatever the fuck you needed to! And you left me. On my birthday. FOR A FUCKING PARTY!”

You were sobbing at this point and your voice cracked as you screamed at him.

Jeff had tears at the brims of his eyes as well, he had no idea how much he hurt you in the past two weeks.

“A fucking party Jeff…god, you’re such an asshole.” You mumbled, wiping your tears frantically, hoping that they would stop flowing.

Jeff blinked back the tears his eyes before he approached you again. He stood this time, at least two feet away to give you your space. It was the distance that hurt him the most, normally he couldn’t take his hands off of you. Now, he had to watch his first love cry, because of him, and she was too upset to even let him wipe away her tears.

“I’m sorry” he began.

And before you could interrupt him he continued.

“I- I’m so sorry.” He tripped over his own apology as a few tears fell from his eyes. He wiped them quickly, he knew he wasn’t in the position to get emotional when he was the one who hurt you.

“I was such a dick…and I- I fucked up big time…I don’t even fucking deserve you…” he struggled to find the right words that would make this all go away, but unlike your usual insignificant fights, he knew there wasn’t any combination of words that would fix it.

“Lemme make it up to you” he pleaded.

You crossed your arms over each other. Furious and devastated all at once. You wanted him to stay with you for the rest of the day but you also wanted him to get the hell out of your room.

Jeff slowly closed the gap between you two, grabbing at your waist.

“Please. Y/N. Let me fix it.”

He stared at you, searching your eyes waiting for your answer.

“I’ll beg if I have to” he offered up with a sad smile.

You frowned avoiding his eyes, you and Jeff both knew his puppy dog eyes could get you to do anything.

And so Jeff got onto his knees, his hands still at your waist and you finally looked at him.

“Jeff, get up” you muttered.

“Just give me a chance to fix it.” He countered.

You nodded quickly if only to get him off the ground, and he smiled standing to his feet again. He embraced you in what felt like the tightest hug ever.

“I’m really sorry” he mumbled into your hair.

And when he pulled away he was leaving your room.

“Cancel all your plans today, I’ll be back in an hour, I promise this is going to be the best day of your life!” He rambled as he grabbed his keys from your bed.

“Jeff, I don’t want you to le-” you whined. This was the first time he was paying attention to you in a while.

“One hour. If I’m not back……dump me!” He called out as he left your room door.

You sat on your bed, hearing the rumble of his engine begin, and when the sound of his car left your ears you exhaled and leaned back onto your bed. Hopeful for what was in store.


Part 2