if not im silently judging you

anonymous asked:

Okay but what if when azura jumps or whatever corrin follows bc she's like "wait im a dragon, i can just fly myself back up"

Given how Kamui writhes frantically like a drunken duck while Aqua falls with a swan-like grace, I bet they kinda forgot they could do that.

“Why is this dumbass panicking so much? They’re going to hit their head on a rock and die before we even reach Valla.”

the band's inner monologue: christmas break edition
  • section leaders: tHEY BETTER PRACTICE OVER BREAK
  • french horn: *heated debate about who is the best reindeer*
  • tuba: *debates taking instrument home for 5 days, decides fuck it*
  • euphonium: *sits silently judging the rest of band*
  • flute: im just going to play zelda songs today
  • trumpet: why is there a candy cane in my case
  • trombone: if i dont find where you hid my slide before christmas i swear
  • piccolo: *debates giving the trombone's slide back*
  • saxophone: *jazz solo occasionally interrupted by random band room chaos*
  • clarinet: if i don't practice, it was my reed's fault
  • percussion: let's hide someone's instrument in the bathrooms
  • baritone: if anyone wants to know how to covertly unwrap and rewrap your presents i'm here
  • band director: tHEY BETTER PRACTICE OVER BREAK
2

“What would you have done?” I asked

Achilles tapped a finger against the branch he sat on. “I don’t know. I can’t imagine it. The way the boy spoke to you.” He shrugged. “No one has ever tried to take something from me.”

“Never?” I could not believe it. A life without such things seemed impossible.

“Never.” He was silent a moment, thinking. “I don’t know,” he repeated finally. “I think I would be angry.” He closed his eyes and rested his head back against a branch. The green oak leaves crowded around his hair, like a crown.

The ULTIMATE What-Shit-To-Pack List for a UK Uni Student-to-be

Im compiling a list (and jeez its long so youre in for the long hall on this one) of stuff to take to uni :) so heres what ive compiled to be the essentials for you.

Pointers: this list is based on living in en suite accom with a ¾ bed and is self catered.

Firstly.

IKEA IS YOUR FRIEND. ALL HAIL IKEA

A lot of stuff you probably have at home already, bring it rather than buy new.

I will judge you silently if you don’t have an empty alcohol bottle collection by the end of first year.

Clothing

Essentially the usual stuff youd take on holiday, but more of it. Think about where in the country youre living (THE NORTH IS FUCKING COLD JUST FYI) and what weathers we get during the year.

 Also have a mix of party and practical clothing. The lil black dress for the society formal? Yes! Those heels for that job interview? Yes! The trainers, jeans and hoodie combo? Hell yes!

Hoodies are beautiful, you will live in them.

Lots and lots and lots of underwear.

Bedding

Duvet + pillows

Duvet case +  pillow cases (2 sets)

Sheets (2 sets)

Mattress protector (to turn the hard squeaky bed into a comfy marshmallow of love)

Cushions and teddies from home because aesthetic

A blanket or two (REFER TO DESCRIPTION OF THE NORTH)

 

Bedroom Furniture

Desk lamp

Storage baskets/boxes

Washing hamper and/or bin

Plug extensions

Laptop stand

Doorstop

Stuff/mementos to decorate room a little

Speakers for ipod/iphone

Clothes hangers

Door hanger shoe organiser (because you can store scarves/hats/etc in them too!

 

Uniwork:

Diary/Planner. I wholeheartedly recommend one from staples! You can move stuff without tearing pages out, write in your own dates/months etc so pages aren’t wasted and can get plastic sleeves for memory sticks etc and those coloured book marker thingies.

Notebooks for each module (way less disorganised than sheets of paper and folders)

Lined paper (good for scrap or that shitty 5 credit plagiarism module you have to do)

Post-it notes

Paperclips and pushpins

Pens, pencils, rubbers, sharpner, highlighters etc

Washi tape – its special tape that you can use to stick things to the walls instead of blu tak as it doesn’t leave a mark! That’s how all my posters are stuck up. Its about £3 on amazon :)

Laptop, bag, charger, mouse, mousemat

 

In your “Man Drawer” – yes that is a reference to Michael McIntyre but trust me you’ll have one of these

At least a months worth of any prescription meds youre on so youre covered until you’ve signed up to a doctors

Batteries – AA and AAA are most useful

Plasters – for the times when you drop the knife and slash yourself and need to not bleed all over your dinner haha

Paracetamol and ibuprofen

Passport, ID, Have a folder of important docs: contract, copy of results, important certificates (sadly the pen licence you got in year 4 wont get you into a bar im afraid) CV etc

Torch

Lanyard to keep your flatkeys and fob on

 

Bathroom

 S

hampoo, conditioner, showergel, soap,

Hand soap

Toothbrush, toothpaste

Flannels and towels

A shower hanger – you get them from ikea and they hang off of the door, they then can be used to store things like shampoo and soap

Razors, pads and tampons

Deodorant

A washbag (for when you travel home

Loo paper

Bleach, shower cleaner, sponge and j cloths

 

Kitchen

 

16 piece set of cheap as shit cutlery – IT WILL GO WALKIES

Cheap drinking glasses

Cheap crockery – plates, mugs, bowl, - ACCEPT THAT IT MAY BE BROKEN

3 sizes of pot. One for soup/instant noodles (aka food of the gods) one for pasta and a large one for the weekends when youre making 1.5 kilos of spaghetti bolognaise to last 4 meals.

Frying pan

Tuppaware – greatest invention

Spatula and cooking spoon and mixing spoons etc

Pyrex bowl

Knife

Grater

Teatowels

Misc

 

Biscuit tin and biscuits

Pack of cards and/or cards against humanity

Overnight bag (for the weekend home)

Suitcase (for dragging a load of washing home at xmas)

Ikea bag – the haut couture of students when carrying their laundry down to the laundry room

 

Things youll get given in freshers:

The opportunity to buy a cactus. -  my cacti are called Edmund and Baldrick. They are my best friends.

Energy drink

Keys

Condoms – even if you don’t plan to use them now keep them just in case. You genuinely never know trust me.

greygreenwolf rachelah93 and stark-and-spice I hope this is useful!

Making 1.5kg of spaghetti bolognaise is  great. trust me.

I wanted to put photos on this but tumblr is shitty. so if you need picks ask and ill post them separate

Seventeen Reaction To Their S/O Doing The PPAP Dance

anon requested:  seventeen react to their gf doing kkap dance X’D

(im assuming this is meant to be the ppap dance?)


S.Coups:

Originally posted by honeybabyluv

*starts doing it with you*

Jeonghan:

Originally posted by japanaesi

*just watches*

Joshua:

Originally posted by diamondandl

*makes it a competition*

Jun:

Originally posted by 00-05-18

*judging silently in his head*

Hoshi:

Originally posted by camera-seventeen

“I bet I can do it better than you!”

Wonwoo:

Originally posted by wonghan

*happily starts doing it with you*

Woozi:

Originally posted by ohmysoups

*runs for his life bc why are you doing that*

Mingyu:

Originally posted by 9717km

“You know me so well~” *joins you*

DK:

Originally posted by japanaesi

*isnt sure if he wants to join or judge you from the sides*

The8:

Originally posted by imemegines

*judges hardcore internally as well as externally*

Seungkwan:

Originally posted by 17diamondcarats

*speechless for once*

Vernon:

Originally posted by sneezes

“…I don’t know you*

Dino:

Originally posted by theresakk1889

*Does it with you shyly*

just imagine n being a dad for the first time tho and he’s at the hospital with white and she’s in labour and she’s holding his hand so tight and sCREAMING “I FUCKING HATE YOU U BUSH HAIRED FREAK” and he’s in tears crying “IM SORRY I WONT EVER IMPREGNATE YOU AGAIN I AM SO SORRY PLEASE” and the nurses and doctors are just staring at them silently judging

anonymous asked:

Tobi is that parent that is secretly a grandparent in disguise in ways that they seem supportive but will silently(openly) judge you but would be on someone's ass if they hurt someone they know

GRANDPARENT ZEA JUST GAVE ME THIS IMAGE

THE PERSON WHO ALWAYS HAS THOSE OLD GRANDMA SWEETS, 

SAD?? HAVE A SWEETIE. ANGRY?? HAVE A SWEETIE. DADDY ISSUES?? SWEETIE. 

Imagine winding up Dean on the phone...

“Okay, not sure exactly when, but I’ll be home soon, is there anything you want from the store?”

You rolled your eyes, even if he couldn’t see you, it made you feel better. That was when the idea crossed your mind.

“If you’re at the shop, get some condoms.” You said coolly.

Dean went silent for a few moments and you began to wonder if he’d actually heard you.

“Did you say what I thought you did?” He said in a husky voice.

“Mmmm,” you hummed. “After my hunt went bust, I’ve just been so… bored. How long you going to be? I’m feeling a little flustered…” You cringed at your own wording, but judging by his tone of voice, it did the job.

“Y/N, I’ll… I’ll be there as quickly as possible.”

signs as therapists
  • aries: suggests fun activites for you to do to get your mind off of things
  • taurus: says "same" in response to everything you say
  • gemini: the happy go lucky therapist who calls you sweetie
  • cancer: cries over your problems
  • leo: understands completely what youre going through and doesnt try to change you as a person
  • virgo: is a great therapist, but probably secretly judges u and ur problems
  • libra: gives the best advice
  • scorpio: silently nods during ur rants and gives little feedback
  • sagittarius: compliments u and makes u feel special
  • capricorn: CHARGES ALOT FOR THEIR SERVICE
  • aquarius: has good techniques
  • pisces: BEST AND MOST UNDERSTANDING THERAPIST EVER
BTS when another member touches their girlfriend

First one im just doing this as an example~ hehe 

- when another member puts an arm around your shoulder


Rapmonster: “Uhhh. Jimin, mind taking your hands off my jagi? thanks. //pulls you back immediately/ she doesn’t like jamless people

Suga: //silent judging and glares, eventually gets fed up and drags you off/ “Hyung is busy trying to hang out with my jagi.” hes totally pouting

Jin: //slowly pulls you over to him and gives them a quick look before continuing the conversation/ “As I was saying before..”

J-hope: //shocked/ “Suga hyung what are you doing…” //wouldnt do anything but would definitely be conflicted./ ‘im supposed to be her hope…’

Jimin: “Yah! jungkookie hands off my jagiyaaa~” //he would whine and pull you away from the maknae/ kookie i love you but thats my jagi

Taehyung: //would switch immediately from being his fun loving self to his scary face at his hyung/ *gif*

Jungkook: //completely conflicted, hes totally jealous but he doesnt want to be disrespectful to his hyungs/ if it were jimin its a different story but “Aahh.. Hyung would you please remove your hand from (y/n)-ah’s shoulder..?”

anonymous asked:

👊🏻IRON REAVER PUSSY EATER!👅 💦 INUYASHA FUCKIN KAGOME DOGGY STYLE 🐶WITH HIS 🍆'TETSAIGA' 🍆 🙎🏻SANGO IS GETTIN HER PUSS LICKED 👅 BY MIROKU 💦💦 AND NARAKU IS GETTIN HIS BALLS GURGLED BY KAGURA. 🍒👄SEND THIS TO 5️⃣OF YOUR INUYASHA HOES TO BECOME A FULL FLEGED HOE AND GET THE SACRED JEWEL 🔮SHOVED UP YOUR COOCH👉🏼👌🏼!!!! IF YOU DONT GET ANY BACK, YOURE JAKKENS BALL 🎾 SWEAT💧!!!

ive always wanted to do that thing where you keep some paper near you while you sleep incase you get a good idea so i did that last night and heres what i wrote down:

  • waterfall made of pubes
  • mike judge sex tape
  • poop dildo
  • cat library (im assuming i meant a place where you check out cats)
  • cock rings for your asshole
  • smegma cheesecake
  • silent hill dating sim
  • hot wing fruit hat
  • fanny packs for cats
  • this ones hard to make out but it starts with lazy town
  • ganondorf blow up doll
  • boomerang minora
  • do it yourself birth kit
  • smores taco
  • bird condoms
  • air horn the national anthem
  • cream puffs shaped like boobs
  • dildo crane machine
  • sex ed for elephants
  • horse sperm glue
  • and a long list that is spaghetti for bones, radius is bowtie, skull is ravioli, rigatoni spine, tortellini hip, macaroni rib cage
there is no title for this. i cried

His corner of the house was more of a subdivision of rooms with a “common room” of sorts that connected them all together, but to get to that room, we first had to go through two others.
Dark navy walls, two plush chairs and a coffee table separating them occupied the first. Some old toys in boxes seemed pushed up against the walls, hoping to go unnoticed and awaiting an exit. I thought it resembled a waiting room.
The air in this room was warmer and homier than the other. A day bed lay against the back wall and posters lined the walls. In one corner stood three guitars- an electric, acoustic and a steel guitar (which I assumed had never been played due to the boys’ lack of affinity for country music).
We padded through the two rooms, the four boys and I, until we finally reached the common room that held normal everyday things to keep a teenage boy occupied- television, video game consoles, sound system, comfy chairs, a futon (?), and a boy stench that was all too familiar. I had spotted a can of Febreeze on a dresser in the previous room, so I reached around the doorway and swung the bottle at eye-level with the rest of the boys who froze in their steps toward the console. With a look of determination, I laughed manically and sprayed half of the bottle in the air around us, causing them to exaggerate coughs and yell at me like I was the bane of their existence, which unfortunately happened pretty frequently these days.
There was one room left, and it didn’t seem as though the guys were going to take me to see it. I let them get settled with the game on the console and tiptoed behind their chairs to the last door in the strange layout.
Its door sat slightly ajar, so I wiggled through it without any backfire from the boys, specifically Luke, considering this was his room.
The next room was something I would never wish on anybody- a hospital bed, vitals monitor and shock white cabinets filled the room with such a grief that I was almost to the point of breaking. Several larger cardboard boxes sat untouched in the middle of the room. I sauntered over to the nearest wall and found a young blonde boy, around 12, lying in a hospital bed with an IV and oxygen tubes in a black frame. He was giving the camera a thumbs up and trying his best to smile.
Luke.
Another had the same weak face assisted by a wheelchair and his mother in outdated attire, pushing him down a road. His mother was radiant, though a tint of weariness sat upon the corners of her eyes.
His father adorned the next, holding the boy on his shoulders while they both sported Manchester United jerseys, assumingly on their way to a game. Luke was slightly younger in this one and had a little bit more health to him.
They were all like this, frame after frame that adorned every wall of the makeshift hospital room.
My hand slipped shakily over my mouth, stifling a sob. I made my way to the dusty boxes in the middle and pulled back a flap to reveal thousands of medical supplies- medicines, needles, gloves- all packed into the untouched boxes.
The hospital bed was still neatly made, complete with starch white sheets and a terrible pillow. The vitals machine was freezing. Somehow, I found myself sitting on the wretched bed, feet dangling over the dusty floor. Why had he not told me about this? What was he sick with? Surely he could’ve died, that’s why all this equipment was here.
I heard a shout from the other area- somebody had lost the game.
I quietly pulled open the drawer in the table next to the bed. Inside laid a stack of papers- a will signed off by his parents due to his age. I attempted quieting another sob but I was too late and I threw the will back into the drawer and slammed it closed, covering my face with my hands.
“Hey,” I peeked through fingers to witness a blonde, beanie-covered head poke through the crack in the door. His expression turned from carelessness to panic as he saw the tears streaming down my face.
“Hey, hey, hey now,” Luke said, rushing over to the bed, carefully taking my hands and engulfing them in his. He scooted onto the bed and looked at me- puppy dog eyes and a pouted lip.
“W-what is-“ was all I could get out before he wrapped his arms around me and I tucked my head into his broad chest.
He sighed and hugged me tighter, shuddering as he looked around the room. “I had what the doctors thought was terminal cancer from the time I was nine to when I was fifteen. I went into remission before I started high school, and it was gone for good by the Christmas of that year. Best Christmas ever…besides when I started dating you-“ at that, he pressed a kiss into the top of my head and continued. “I never thought about telling you because I didn’t think I’d have to…and I didn’t want to, to be completely honest. It hurts a little still talking about it.”
I pulled back from his chest and wiped the tearstains from my cheeks. “Did they think you’d make it?”
“No.”
“But you did…?”
“I did. And it blew the minds of all the doctors I’ve ever seen.”
“That’s incredible,” I said, half-heartedly smiling. He ripped the beanie off his head and ran his fingers through the blonde paintbrush hair on his head.
“I’ve got a scar to prove it,” He said with a smirk.
“Ooh, show me!” I said, giving him a false new vibrato.
He chuckled and reached for my hand. “You’ve gotta find it, first…”
I blinked twice and then understood where he was heading.
Luke lightly pushed my shoulders down into the sheets, likely where he’d spent days, weeks of his younger years. “Here, Luke?” I asked, eyeing the bed.
“It’s been bleached so many times that we’re probably getting whiter just sitting on it.”
I chuckled and relaxed. His t-shirt hung underneath him and laid on me, his arms resting on both sides of my head, fingers toying with my hair. Sparkling blue eyes pierced mine and he smiled the biggest grin I’ve ever seen in my entire life.
“What?” I giggled.
“I’m alive…you’re alive…what a time to be alive.” He whispered as he closed the gap between our lips. His hands roamed my body until one of them found one of mine and slowly brought it to the hem of his shirt. Releasing his mouth from mine, he attached it to my jaw while sliding my hand up his stomach. The scar began at the base of his ribcage and stopped at his collarbone. I gasped upon its touch. It was like I could feel the tendons underneath the skin, but more importantly I could feel the rapidly beating heart beneath it that was very much alive.
“Baby…” I sighed into his ear. His lips detached from my skin and he stared me dead into my soul. He rubbed his nose on mine and I giggled quietly, studying his face- the silent freckles, subtle stubble, girlish nose, upturned eyes- everything.
“Yes, dear,” He replied, bringing a thumb up to caress my cheek.
“I’m glad it’s you.” I whispered, silently giggling and laying one of my hands on his.
“And I’m glad it’s you,” he said, grinning onto my lips.