a message from women:
do you know what it’s like to be left alone in love?
do you know what it’s like to feel stuck in love?
do you know what it’s like to be too depressed?
do you know what it’s like to have to beg for
forever from a person who neglects your history?
do you what it’s like to lose everything?
do you know what it’s like to feel abandoned?
do you know what it’s like to wait?
do you know that i will never be too near or too far away?
honestly, i’m still waiting for closure.
i still question what this is— or what this was?
because i can’t help but hope
our feelings were mutual.
do you know how it feels to constantly chase
a feeling you’re addicted to?
do you know i’ve got the jones for you.
and an appetite. and a sweet tooth.
do you know i prayed for you?
from night ’til day.
regardless of my better judgement or dismay
time after time after promises
that never seemed impossible or too good to be TRUE.
do you know what it’s like to try
convincing yourself that— this was the truth.
like i was the woman created for you.
do you know how much i’ve craved you?
i’ve searched for you everywhere
in people, in prayer, in psalm.
in different lovers, in god.
and god— i, wish you really knew.
that i’d love you till death,
or that i’d kill for you.
or that i feel you, like soul deep, like
deeper than anyone ever will.
do you know what it’s like to feel dead inside
and see you so alive, still?
but these days i feel alive.
i’ve been able to realize
you just weren’t meant for me.
these days i don’t cry over
or lost love
or things i have no control of.
these days i just love myself more.
i just know there’s a happily ever after.
these days i just — don’t see it with you.
nothing personal i think i just fell too quick for your potential.
i just wanted you to be the one.
i just thought we made sense
but now i love myself enough to know better..
okay so i’m in love with this girl. it’s been two years and i even have a blog where i write poetry and gush about her so you know it’s real.
anyway we were face-timing and just talking. she said she’d be right back, had to get her glasses. now i knew she had glasses, but i’d never seen her wear them before. i look away from the screen for two seconds, look back, and bam. my princess is sitting there, looking pretty and sweet in her glasses. remember i had never seen her in them before.
most girls would have just complimented her and moved on, but not i. being the incredibly useless lesbian i am, i began to cry. i was so overwhelmed by how incredibly beautiful my precious girl looked in her glasses that i began to weep. she laughed and asked what was wrong. i explained and she only laughed more.
that was a few months ago and i still love her in her glasses. she looks so stunning and i swear that i literally fell in love with aphrodite.
I watched her as she climbed into one of the motel beds, pulling back the slightly scratchy comforter and sliding into the not so comfortable sheets.
“Night, Dean,” she sighed, her left arm curling under one of the pillows and pulling it closer to her, snuggling into it and pulling the blankets over her head to burrow deeper into the bed, hiding from the light.
I smiled softly at her form in the bed, the smile reaching my eyes as I recalled the countless times she had crawled into a bed without knowing how inviting she was. She had no idea the things she did to me. It was like she wasn’t even trying and that made her sex appeal skyrocket times a million.
Slowly, I began undressing, first my suit jacket, then my tie, and before long I was in nothing but a grey undershirt and my boxers. I couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like to fall asleep with her in my arms. So many nights, sharing a bed, I’d wanted so desperately to reach over and pull her into my arms, but I didn’t.
Tonight that was going to change.
I glanced at Sam’s sleeping body in the other bed before sliding into the bed with Y/N. She didn’t stir, not registering my presence.
Slowly, hesitantly, I wrapped my arms around her waist and nuzzled into her neck, inhaling her intoxicating scent. She sighed against my chest and moved slightly in my arms.
Immediately my arms stiffened around her, afraid she would think I had lost it or something.
Instead, she turned in my harms and wrapped her arms around my waist, burying her head in my chest. I pushed her hair out of her face and realized she was dead to the world. It didn’t stop her from seeking comfort in me and that made my heart swell.
I kissed the top of her head and sighed contentedly. I finally had the girl of my dreams, in bed, wrapped in my arms, and she was passed out cold. I chuckled softly, kissing her temple before hugging her closer to me.
“I love you, Y/N,” I whispered in her hair. “Maybe one day I’ll be man enough to tell you to your face,” I sighed before I fell asleep with her safe in my arms where she belonged.
Nobody is perfect, but you’re as close as anyone will ever get. I love everything about you, I love all your flaws as much as I love your strengths. If anything they only make you seem more perfect, only make me love you more. All your little quirks and imperfections are what makes you the person I fell in love with.
Hey everyone! Never thought Heat and Heathens would get this much love! Thank you so much! Obviously inspired by the iconic TNHMB music video, here is part three! Hope you like it :)
His heart raced in his chest as he spurted down the hallway almost knocking some guy over, stumbling over his feet. He knocked on her door, softly at first, harder when she wouldn’t open the door.
“Baby! It’s me! Shawn!” he yelled, while slamming his hand against the door.
He finally heard steps and she opened the door. Seeing her almost broke his heart.
Mascara smudged underneath her red eyes, lips trembling, her whole body shivering as she wrapped her arms around herself.
“Can I come in?” he asked, concern lacing his words.
She nodded, a quiet sob leaving her lips. He closed the door behind him and she kneeled on the floor, her suitcase in front of her, clothes scattered around the floor.
“I’m… I can’t… I can’t pack my things, Shawn,” she sobbed, her shoulders shaking and he knelt down next to her, taking her hand, pressing her fingers against his lips.
“You aren’t going anywhere, baby. I won’t let you go. You are going to stay with me. For the rest of the tour.”
She shook her head, her unbelieving eyes filling with tears. “But, but Geoff… he,” she sobbed again, tears streaming down her beautiful face and Shawn wiped them away with his thumb, cupping her face in his hands.
“Shhh, baby, everything will be okay, Geoff is okay… with us… dating,” he smiled reassuringly, softly kissing her, closing his eyes.
She gasped against his lips, an arousing gasp almost, and he had to bite his lip.
She’s so gorgeous. She doesn’t even have to try. She’ll kill me eventually.
“He is?” she whispered and Shawn nodded, smiling at her.
“Come here,” he said under his breath, wrapping his arms around her, pulling her onto his lap and she nuzzled her head into the crook of his neck, taking in his familiar scent.
He held her head gently, playing with her hair, softly swaying her in his arms until her tears were dry and he didn’t stop kissing her for a while. Cheeks flushed, lips swollen, eyes sparkling, as her hands were in his hair, he couldn’t believe his luck.
As the tour continued, Shawn was falling more in love each day while becoming more frustrated as well. Geoff would never leave him alone with his sister, always making sure they weren’t alone in a room.
They were not allowed to kiss or to hug or to hold hands when Geoff was around and even though Shawn was busy he craved her. He needed her touch after playing a show, he needed her kisses, her hugs, feeling her skin against his. Shawn almost lost it when Geoff would sit between them during breakfast in Milan – making sure Shawn and his sister were as far apart as possible.
But what was even worse was sleeping on the same tour bus as her. Knowing she was asleep in her bunk bed. Wearing tiny pajama shorts, her hair spread over the pillow, rosy lips slightly parted, chest heaving.
He let out a frustrated growl, desperately wanting to crawl into her bunk bed and undress her, cuddle her, feel her.
But there was no chance with Geoff watching his every step like a watchdog.
Shawn sighed, running his fingers through his curls, listening to Geoff snoring and Zubin mumbling something in his sleep.
He carefully slid out of his bunk bed, tiptoeing to her bunk, after getting dressed.
His heart jumped as he saw her, laying there. Just as he imagined it, she was wearing tiny shorts, having kicked back the comforter, lying on her stomach, her butt sticking out slightly.
“Fuck,” Shawn muttered under his breath, gently touching her arm with his fingertips. He continued caressing her cheek, tracing her lip with his thumb. As he softly kissed her temple, she huffed, turning around, slowly opening her eyes.
“Shawn?” she mumbled, rubbing her tired eyes.
“Shhh!” he pressed a finger on her plump lips. “Quiet, baby, we don’t want to wake anyone up,” he whispered and she smiled against his finger, playfully trying to bite it. He grinned at her, gently kissing her, making their tongues touch.
“Let’s get away from here!” he panted, grabbing her hand.
“Now?” she giggled, checking her phone. “It’s 1:30 a.m.! Aren’t you tired? You played a show tonight!”
He remembered seeing her in the audience, cheering and singing her heart out and how it had sent a rush of electricity through his body.
He shook his head, making his soft curls bounce. “No! I want to spend every single minute with you! Let’s go!”
She grinned, caressing his cheek with the back of her hand, quickly getting into a summer dress and ankle booties, looking for her leather jacket and bag.
“Let’s go!” she whispered and he took her hand, leading her through the tour bus. He quickly checked if Geoff was asleep, giving her a thumbs up as Geoff was snoring loudly, turning his back to them.
They quickly got out of the bus and made their way down the dark street. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder, smiling at her. “Finally some privacy!” he exclaimed and she giggled. “Yes! Thank God!” They strolled down the street and as they passed a rent-a-motorcycle- place she knew what he was thinking as he looked at her, his eyes sparkling.
“Should we?” he asked, holding her hands, interlacing his fingers with hers.
“Yes!” she nodded and pulled him into the place that seemed to be open 24 hours.
The man leaning at the desk, seemed to be half asleep as they entered the room.
“Buonasera,” he greeted them, eying them intently, narrowing his eyes.
“Buonasera!” she replied excitedly. “We want to rent a motorcycle!” she beamed at him and the man frowned, furrowing his brows.
“Mhm, how old are you, bella?”
Shawn looked on mesmerized how her cheeks turned pink and she was nervously nibbling on her bottom lip, while still holding his hand. He gently hugged her from behind, wrapping his strong arms around her middle.
“Okay let me see what we have…” the guy mumbled, checking his computer.
“I can’t give you a motorcycle… is a Vespa okay?”
She turned her head to look Shawn in the eyes and he nodded. “Yes, a Vespa is awesome! Thank you!”
Shawn slid his credit card over the counter and the man disappeared to get the helmets and the key.
“This is so crazy!” she giggled, wrapping her arms around his neck, as he leaned in to kiss her softly. “I know.” He breathed against her lips. “You make me go crazy,” he smiled and pulled away as soon as the man came back, two helmets in his hand.
“Drive carefully!” he warned them, handing them the helmets before leading them to the Vespa. It was a baby blue one and she loved it, beaming at Shawn who sat down, hands around the white handles.
“Grazie!” Shawn said to the Italian guy as she sat down behind him, cheek pressed against his back, arms around his middle.
He started the Vespa and off they went into the summer night, anticipating the few hours of freedom waiting for them.
The night was perfect, the sky clear, a soft breeze and the smell of summer in the air. The slight smell of sunscreen, sweat, ice cream and orange trees mixed up with her unique scent made Shawn’s heart flutter.
As they reached the city center of Milan, he parked the Vespa and they got off. He instinctively took her hand again and they took of their helmets, locking them away with the Vespa.
They strolled along the dark streets, occasionally stopping just to look at each other or to plaster soft innocent kisses on each other’s faces and as she stood under a street lamp and the light hit her face he wanted to take a picture and frame it and never stop looking at it. His heart almost ached from looking at her.
Her blue eyes glistening with joy and love, her beautiful lips curving up into the most adorable smile. He leaned her against a railing, his hands roaming over her sides, pressing his lips on hers, kissing her hungrily.
“I just- I just want you to know that yesterday night was very special to me,” he breathed against her lips, before looking her in the eyes.
“I know… for me too,” she replied quietly.
He cleared his throat. “I know that your brother is worried but he doesn’t have to be. I love you. A lot. And more each day and I won’t hurt you,” he whispered, his voice full of adoration and affection. “I will never hurt you.”
She nodded, tracing his cheekbones with her fingertips. “I know, Shawn.” She kissed him softly, having to stand on her tip toes.
He took her hand and they continued to stroll along the dark street until Shawn’s eyes fell on a little queue of people waiting in front of what seemed to be a bar or night club.
“Wanna go partying?” he chuckled against her temple and she laughed.
“Yes! Let’s go clubbing!”
She took his hand and they entered the night club where obnoxious techno music was playing and people were obviously wasted, dancing around.
Shawn took her hand and twirled her around, laughing as she stumbled into his arms. He kissed her on the dancefloor, hands cupping her face.
“God, I love you!” he shouted over the music and she shouted “I love you” back.
“The music is awful!” she yelled, scrunching her nose. He threw his head back in laughter. “It is!” They continued jumping around like little children, shaking their heads and holding their bellies from laughing so much until finally a rather decent song came on.
Sage The Gemini’s “Now And Later” started playing and they sang along, his hands on her hips.
I can be ya lifesaver Treat me like a jawbreaker You got 31 flavors, baby You can get this now and later, now and later You can get this now and later, now and later It’s your choice
“I’ll get us something to drink,” he yelled. “Wait here,” he whispered into her ear and she looked on as he made his way to the bar, wearing his denim jacket, messy curls bopping as he leaned over the bar.
She felt like the luckiest girl in the world, a bright smile on her face as she lifted her hands up to the beat, closing her eyes.
She flinched as soon as she felt hands on her hips. Strange hands. Certainly not Shawn’s hands as he was still at the bar.
She gulped, feeling a stranger’s breath on her neck. She tried to get away but the stranger held her back.
“Where do you think you’re going, sweetheart?” the man hissed, holding her closer.
“Let me go!” she shrieked, trying to free herself from his grip. “Please!”
The obviously drunk man, shook his head, leaning in. She could smell his breath that was making her want to vomit. He dragged her after him as she frantically looked through the crowded room, trying to make eye contact with Shawn. But she couldn’t see him.
And he couldn’t see her.
With two drinks in hand he searched the club for her, feeling a weird tightness around his chest as he couldn’t see her where he left her.
His heart started pounding, he could feel the cold sweat running down his spine as he shoved people to the side, searching for her.
His hands trembled and he put the drinks down at a table nearby as he saw her.
The fear on her face. She was being pressed against the wall, a lanky guy way too close to her, pinning her wrists over her head and Shawn could feel the heat in his cheeks.
With two strides, he was by her side, grabbing the guy’s collar. “Back the fuck off!” he shouted, making the guy stumble backwards.
The guy looked at him. “Who the fuck do you think you are?”
“I’m her boyfriend, asshole!” Shawn spat out, turning his attention to her. “Are you okay? Did he hurt you?”
She shook her head, holding onto Shawn’s arm. “No, I’m okay,” her voice trembling, making Shawn want to hold her close. After punching that idiot in the face.
“She’s taken! Back off, dude!” Shawn snorted and interlaced his fingers with hers, pulling her into a calmer corner of the room.
Tracing her jaw and cheeks with his fingertips, he eyed her intently, eyes narrowing. “He touched you,” he said with gritted teeth.
She rolled her eyes at him. “I’m fine!” she replied. “Really, Shawn, don’t turn into Geoff now!”
He sighed, cupping her face with his hands. “I’m just trying to take care of you, okay?”
She pressed her lips together. “I’m okay, Shawn, I don’t need a babysitter! Why does everyone want to protect me all the time? I’m sick of this!”
Shawn grinned, resting his forehead against hers. “Have you ever looked at yourself? You’re so petite and tiny and delicate and… fragile”
“I’m not fragile!” she huffed. “Only because you’re a freaking giant you shouldn’t call me petite, okay?”
He chuckled in amusement seeing her all upset, looking up at him and he pressed his lips against hers, feeling her melt underneath his touch.
“But I’m your giant,” he mumbled against her lips and she smiled at him and his heart jumped and he pressed her to his chest, resting his chin on her head.
He heard the clicking before he saw them. And then a flashlight. And he knew. He knew that something was terribly wrong.
“Oh my God, it’s Shawn Mendes!” he heard someone scream and he looked around, panic starting to raise in his chest.
No, no, no, no.
They found us.
She saw someone taking a photo, cellphone in her face and she shielded her face with her hand.
He looked at her, eyes widening. “We gotta get away from here! NOW!” He grabbed her hand and they ran through the crowd. Shawn felt someone pushing him, another person grabbing him and it felt as someone was touching his jeans but he kept running and running until they stumbled out of the nightclub just to run into a little group of paparazzi, waiting outside.
“SHAWN! LOOK HERE! SMILE FOR THE PHOTO! WHO IS THE GIRL?”
“Don’t let go of my hand, okay?” he said over his shoulder, a firm grip around her hand and she nodded, feeling anxious, as the flashlight was blending her.
Shawn looked around, seeing a dark street on his right side. He nodded his head into the direction and tugged at her hand. “This way!”
They sprinted down the street, her heels clicking on the asphalt.
Shawn turned around for a second, seeing that a paparazzo was chasing them.
“RUN!” he shouted over his shoulder, dragging her along, running faster and faster.
She tried to keep up with his fast pace, panting as she stumbled after him. He quickly pulled her into a narrow street, pressing her against the brick wall, his hand covering her mouth.
They watched on as the paparazzo kept running, in the wrong direction, not having noticed that they turned into that street.
She panted heavily, breathing against his palm and he rested one hand against the wall, near her face, slowly removing his hand from her mouth, his thumb grazing her bottom lip.
Overwhelmed with the adrenaline rush and the love he felt for her, he pressed her against the wall, chuckling, kissing her neck.
“Fuck, this was crazy!” she giggled, her hands on his chest, clutching his denim jacket as he wrapped a loose strand of hair around his index finger.
“I’m so out of breath,” he giggled, continuing to kiss her in the dark street and she ran her fingertips over his ripped abs, smiling up at him.
“So these early mornings in the gym don’t have any effect or what?” Her cheeky grin was everything he needed to kiss her passionately, making her gasp, his teeth nibbling at her lip, his tongue touching her in a wild, rough way, his hands grabbing her face as he tilted his heads to kiss her even harder.
As he pulled away he bit his lip, seeing how swollen her lips were. “Only way to shut you up,” he chuckled, resting his forehead against hers and she wrapped her arms around his neck, laughing at him.
And then the sound of police sirens cutting through the darkness.
It happened so fast. The sirens blaring in their ears, the police car pulling up and those two young hearts skipped a beat.
Pairing: Peter Maximoff x Reader Request:
Hey can u do #4 from the embarrassing dialogue prompt list ? With peter maximoff ❤️ +
Number 7 from the embarrassing prompt list with peter maximoff pretty please Word Count: 1209 Warning: Fluff, lil angst, swearing, Peter being a dork, somewhat nudity?? A/N: I combined requests because efficiency (and I’m lazy) So enjoy!! Tagging: @notsoprettykitty, @stovehairington, @writing-rogue,
((gif not mine, credit to owner))
“You think Y/n likes me?” Peter asked Jubilee as they laid on the lawn, music playing quietly through Peter’s speakers.
“I don’t know, I mean you act like a total idiot around them.” She stated propping herself up while Peter huffed.
“You totally do, you tripped over your feet when Y/n smiled at you, dropped a mug on the floor when they walked by and remember the time you walked into the lamp post.”
“Pfft no one saw that…did they?” Peter asked, somewhat desperately while she snorted.
“Yeah everyone saw you walk into a pole when they said hi. It was kind of hilarious.” Jubilee giggled while Peter groaned.
“Fuck, I can’t help it, when they’re around I just can’t think straight. Y/n just does something to me, I feel like I can’t breathe, but it’s exhilarating–I don’t know, never mind.” Peter shrugged it off while Jubilee ogled over his head over heels state.
“I’m pretty sure you’re past liking Y/n. You’re in looooove.” She chirped while heat rose to Peter’s face.
i think we were just hit by the tornado. the rough patch of every relationship. the fighting and endless hours of crying. i dont know if you will love me like you did before this, and I really don’t know if we’ll be the same after this. they say you can see the tornado coming, i think i saw it in my eyes last night while tears fell down from my eyes at 2 am and i gasped for breath because it hurt too much. and i think i created this tornado. and i think it all started with little thoughts and anxiety. i created the tornado which left me sobbing. and i created it bit by bit and now its spinning so fast, my worlds turning around but i hope by the end of it, you’re still here holding my hand like you did before, like you never left it.