if i could start today again

It’s a breezy summer day and the rustling from the leaves outside sound like whispers from my small apartment. I’m sitting in front of my laptop, silently studying the 1.6 billion faces speaking simultaneously in front of me. It’s Monday, the day of the weekly conference call between all Muslims. We have been required to attend this Skype meeting from the the tender age of fetus, but I had never spoken in one of them before. 

That changes today. 

“Hey guys, what if…” I start to say. 

Nobody hears me, but I refuse to be silent. How could I show my face again on Tumblr if I couldn’t even save my mayonnaise friends from death? How could I expect to earn their respect? Anon was right; why hadn’t I done this before? Thousands of lives had paid the price for my ignorance, but not anymore.

“What if you guys….. stopped killing people.“ 

Suddenly, silence. 

1,643,398,023 pairs of eyes are on me. My heart is in my throat as the ISIS leader gives me a blank expression. 

A single tear rolls down my cheek. "Please.” I say with a broken voice. 

He is moved. 

“Aight”.

An Update

Hey everyone. Gonna throw in some real talk here.

For the last few months I had lost health insurance that had kept me medicated and stable over the years. Due to having to switch insurance in California, it took a lot longer than expected to get approved, get an appointment, and finally get said medication.

During this lapse, my life kinda fell apart. I lost the urge to do anything. I stopped talking to a lot of my close friends. Drawing or anything productive seemed completely out of my reach. I didn’t take care of myself well, and was procrastinating on commissions and obligations with friends.

It has been some of the worst months of my life, but I tried to hide it from my friends and followers to keep this blog from becoming too much of a personal one. For that, I apologize.

But, things have finally turned around today. I just started medicating again, and I feel better than I had felt since before I left. I feel motivated again. I could finally draw something without thinking it was a pointless endeavor. It was a bit emotional I guess. 

But to summarize: After months of struggling, I feel like myself again. And that means I finally can work on things I had put off for months on end. 

‘The End’ is back in development. Commissions are going to get done. And comics will be made. To everyone who has been patient with these long lapses in updates, and to friends who have been encouraging me to keep going, thank you.

I’ll see you all very soon.

I Don’t Mean It (pt 9)

Taehyung ran as fast as his legs could take him, not worrying about who noticed him this late at night on the streets. He couldn’t believe how all these events had played off. He couldn’t believe he didn’t trust you, especially when you told him that you didn’t do it. The image you crying kept replaying in his head as he ran towards the building. He was suddenly scared to approach you. 

He thought back to the conversation you both had months and months ago. You both sat on the couch, while you had the TV on in the background as the two of you chatted. That was the first night that Taehyung realized he had fallen in love with you. The way he was so comfortable to open up with you and how you felt the same about him. It was like a connection he never felt before. 

He remembered you saying that you value trust as one of the single most important things in your life. And once that trust was broken, it would never be whole again. 

Not only did he probably break your trust, but he felt like he broke you too. He remembered the words he yelled at you, now realizing how hurtful they really must have been. 


As soon as Taehyung reached his building, he was waiting for the elevator with what little patience he had left. Seeing as you both lived on the 8th floors, he thought the elevator was his best bet but it seemed to be taking longer than usual. Just as he was about to start running up the stairs, the door belonging to the landlord on the first floor opened. 

Out came a rather old man and Taehyung knew he had to at least say hello, even though he wanted nothing more than to run up. 

“Oh hi there Taehyung…you look rather out of breath,” said the landlord

“Oh…haha yeah sort of” said Taehyung, awkwardly fiddling with his hands, waiting to be excused.

“Oh..you must have been helping your neighbor bring boxes down!” said the landlord. This caught Taehyung’s attention. 

“N-neighbor?” Taehyung asked.

“Oh yes! That lovely girl next door to you boys. She said she was moving soon” said the landlord.

Taehyung didn’t even say anything before he rushed up the stairs, knowing he had to stop you at all costs. He ran to your door and before he knocked, he tried to catch his breath and tried to think of what he was going to say to you. He knew earning your forgiveness was no easy task, but you would always forgive him in the end…right? You both had a few small arguments here and there but you had always forgiven him without much effort on his part. Would this time be any different?

Taehyung finally knocked on the door, anxiously waiting for you to open the door. While waiting, he thought back to all the times you opened the door for him with the biggest smile on your face. Was he wrong for wanting that again?

He could hear the door unlock and he let go of a breath he didn’t know he was holding. Thankfully you were home. 

“You’re ear–” you said, but stopped as you finally saw who was at the door. You were expecting the movers to come by today, but you were surprised to see Taehyung at the door. You gulped, wondering if he had wanted to come to yell at you some more. 

“You..you’re moving?” Taehyung asked. He didn’t mean to start with that, but he couldn’t help himself when he noticed all the cardboard boxes that stood behind you.

You only stare at Taehyung, confused with the tone of his voice. You didn’t know what to say. “Y-yes” was all you could bring out.

“w-why?” he continued.

“I don’t have any reason to stay anymore” you said, tears starting to well up in your eyes again. Before he could say anything else, you tried closing the door on him, but he grabbed the door and pushed it back. He let himself in and you stared at him, wide-eyed.

“Y/N.. I’m so sorry” he said looking directly at you. His tone was guilt ridden. He almost couldn’t meet your eyes after noticing the tears, but he knew he had to stand his ground.

“For what exactly?” you say emotionless. If it weren’t for your tears, you could have been mistaken as a statue. 

“For..what I said before. I- I don’t know what I was thinking” Taehyung started, finally tearing away from your eyes as it was getting to much to take.

“You were thinking that I was some low-life scum who was only friends with you to make a few bucks” you said, finally letting the tears flow freely down your slightly rosy cheeks.

“No..I don’t think that of you. I didn’t mean it” Taehyung started pleading as he inched closer to you.

“No, you did mean it” You said, backing away when you noticed him trying to get closer to you.

“Y/N, please, i’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have said the things I did…I’m so sorry” Taehyung continued. His stomach started to turn when he thought that there was the chance that you didn’t forgive him this time around. “I heard my manager. He said he made the whole thing up to keep us apart, Y/N please….” he tried again.

You snickered back. “So…you only believe me now because you heard the truth from your manager….otherwise you still wouldn’t have taken my word. Am I right?” you said, with a sudden anger surging through your veins.

Taehyung thought about it for a while, and he knew that a part of what you said was true. He didn’t believe you when you said you didn’t do it, and he knew that he didn’t plan to hear you out either. But a part of him also wanted to keep on holding onto you, even if you had betrayed him.

When it took him a while to reply, you continued “I guess I have my answer….please leave” you said, wiping the tears away from your eyes.

“No, Y/N please hear me out. Please, I’m begging you. Just forgive me this one time please? You’ve always forgiven me in the past, Y/N please” he pleaded, tears threatening to form in his eyes.

“You didn’t want to hear what I had to say, which I should do the same for you?” you asked as you glared back at him.

“I was dumb, Y/N you know me. I always make stupid mistakes, but you always found it in your heart to forgive me. Please, just this one last time, forgive me. I don’t want to lose you….There’s so much I wanted to tell you….” he said as his voice cracked a little at the last part.

You didn’t like seeing Taehyung like this. You always had wanted him to have that box smile on his face, and be the little ball of happiness that he was. But you didn’t know if you could ever be the same with him again. If he doubted you then, what’s to keep him from doubting you in the future? He broke your heart before you even had the chance of giving it all to him, before he even knew that it already belonged to him in the first place. Now, you were just trying to pick up the pieces of your shattered heart, hoping that one day it will be like it was before. 

The eerie silence once again filled the room. Taehyung tried to walk to you again, hoping that he just had you in his arms, you could find it in yourself to forgive him. But you stuck your hand out, signaling him to stop.

“No. Leave.” you said firmly.

“Y/N…p-ple” he started

“LEAVE” you screamed back. You let out your sobs and fell to your knees, not having any more energy to continue.

Taehyung wanted nothing more than to run to you and hold you. To let you cry into his arms as he would probably cry back into yours. But he knew that you weren’t going to let him near you, even in your current position. He didn’t want to, but he walked out of your door, finally letting the tears fall. His vision blurred from the tears as he walked back to his own apartment, just a few feet down.

He walked into the silent and dark room, not bothering to turn on the lights. He felt his phone buzz in his pocket, but he already knew that it was just the boys looking for him. 

Eventually, the phone stopped buzzing after a few minutes and Taehyung plopped himself onto his bed, finally letting his own tears fall freely.

He just lost you. He lost the girl who he feel so deeply in love with. He didn’t even have the chance to tell you how much you meant to him, or how much he wanted to make you his. Instead, he took the heart he wanted to badly and broke it. He didn’t know why chose to believe his manager’s lies, because deep down he knew you would never do something like that. But it scared him nonetheless. He thought that if his manager was right, then he would end up hurting. So he hurt you instead.

And now here you both were, lonely, in pain, and broken.


A/N: So like…The series is not over. For those of you guys who like pure angst, and don’t want a happy ending, then I suggest you stop here. In the future part(s), I’m writing with the intention of a happy ending. Do y’all want part 10? What do you think is going to happen to Y/n and Tae?! Let me know~ I love hearing from y’all. The support I’ve gotten from this one series has been amazing and it’s been so much fun writing for you guys. Part 1 has reached over 1.8k notes and I’m still in awe. 

Previous Parts: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

where-do-you-want-to-start  asked:

Oh god I love you. I love the colors. I love your art style. I love your kindness when you answer all those asks. I just love everything you're doing here. And I think you need even more love, so I'll love you until you love your art as much as we do.

I…. how do I thank you enough??? omg…
I’ll just share my favorite screenshots, please look at this cute yuuri

1. I should’ve bought more flowers for you, now I buy flowers even if today isn’t Valentine’s Day or a day with a specific meaning, in a way, every petal is imbued with an apology and every time someone leans in to smell it they can feel the parts of me that you’ve forgiven far long before I could

2. I didn’t start to feel better until I started to take better care of myself, a constant whisper of you saying “i was just worried about you”

3. You can’t let someone be your only source of happiness because once they’re gone, you’re all alone again and there’s nothing worse than starting all the way back over with yourself: square one of a broken heart multiplied by the intensity of she’s not coming back, let her go

4. Music will never betray me

5. Poetry is thinking that you’ve got it figured out and a metaphor is just your way of saying I don’t

6. Art rules the world and I am a masterpiece in progress; how can I love myself like how you did if I can’t see that little bit?

7. Lust isn’t conducive for growth, it’s like an addict trying to get his fix– some day, he’s going to break and not even the drug can help him

8. I buy myself nice things, but I can’t fill this emptiness inside of my heart– I guess some nights, I just miss being next to you

9. I still can’t get used to sleeping alone

10. Sometimes I wish I would’ve picked up your phone calls during the first few months, I broke my promise and you know something? I regret it

11. I threw away our love letters and memories two months ago, I cried the whole time– yeah, still a fool for you, but baby, we’ve changed so much, I’m happy with my unhappy

12. You once told me to go on many adventures without you, did you account for my depression? You know, I don’t blame you for any of this. In reality it was always an us thing, a too young thing, a stupid, mad love thing– as always, I still love you, I just don’t know what love is anymore

13. They were right, soulmates touch you and they change you forever– the moment a colorful paint filled brush hits the water and the figments of colors flow into the cup, you left my soul with so many seasons, I’m still raking up the leaves from last fall

14. The last time I saw you we shouldn’t have had sex, I think that night really broke you– I think that night really broke me too

15. I should’ve laid my head onto your chest and counted your heartbeats more often, I’m sorry

16. Sometimes when I talk to people and tell them random facts that you’ve filled my head up, I swear I can hear your voice echo in the back of my head– “baby, check this out, you’re gonna love it”

17. I always do

18. I still remember your favorite Harry Potter line

19. After all of this time? …Always.

20. I smoke cigarettes to think about how to think less, the fucking irony

21. I take painkillers and my excuse is that my right hand still hurts, in truth, I’m just another addict that believes if I take another maybe my heart might just start to sound like it belongs to me

22. I didn’t cut myself because I wanted to die, I cut myself open because I wanted to feel how often I made your heart break, each scar on my shoulders is a time when I’ve made you cry

23. And each night that I can’t sleep, I stay up wishing that you’re doing okay

24. I don’t pray often, but when I do, I always prayed for your mom, although she hated me, I’m so glad that she put you on this earth to allow us to meet– I have changed so much since I’ve met you

25. The crazy part? You still change me everyday

26. You know the renaissance era? Falling in love with you was like that

27. My favorite photo of us were those two kids eating a banana split at the New Orleans mall, I miss those two innocent kids, oh, how we’ve changed

28. We are destined to have this eternal flame kind of distance– the brighter I burn, the more you’ll read, the only thing that keeps me writing some days is knowing that somewhere, somehow you’re always reading, no matter who you’re with or if you’re laughing or crying or smiling

29. My number one fan was always you first

30. I’ve made so many bad decisions, you were never one of them

31. I’ve written so many bad poems, you were in every single one

32. I’ve written some pretty great ones too tho…!
You were also in those

33. I miss cleaning your eyes for you

34. I have met some amazing people because of what happened to us

35. I can’t get you by Fallbrooke the acoustic version is no longer on the internet, the funny part? The very last day that it was on the web, I downloaded it right before they removed it. It’s still my favorite song of all time, our song

36. Hold your tears by Clazziquai too

37. Sometimes when I get off from work, I sit in the car and cry, some tears don’t have meaning, they just need to come out

38. I claim to write poetry, but I feel like they’re just love letters sent to no one in particular

39. It’s not that I’m not over you, I’m just trying to get used to not needed you

40. It’s not that it hurts to the point where I can’t breathe, I’m just trying to light my own path to self-love and healing

41. The fact that your favorite color is orange, it makes the fruit taste some type of way

42. Sometimes I want to call you, but I don’t

42. Sometimes I want to text you and I do

43. Sometimes I want you to answer, I’m glad you don’t

43. Sometimes I just want to say fuck it all and call, I’m glad that I don’t

44. You stopped writing when we first met, in some way, the girl that waits by the shore has left a million pens near my desk and to this day– I wait by the shore too, just in case inspiration hits, right?

45. Our little codes of love finally decoded enough for me to not be blinded by you

46. We were both messed up people, I think we knew that about each other and maybe that’s why I always know when you’re not feeling okay

47. I still don’t have love figured out, but damn I’ll open every fucking door in my heart even if I have to go down the sewer to find every key

48. Someone says that she’s falling for me, I’m legit afraid to hurt people now– like it’s a real fear, I don’t want to hurt anyone anymore

49. I should’ve given you the stars, but instead I left your heart scattered across the universe

50. It’s been almost two year and I’m still writing about you, but at least it’s less often, right?

51. You’ve always been kinda self-centered, I think you enjoy it when I write about you. Like if I write about you in some way, maybe I’m still yours

52. We were just too damn young to realize how destructive passion, love, romance, stagnation, betrayal and pain is when mixed together

53. Sometimes I go to the places that we used to go just to create new memories without you

54. Sometimes it works

55. Most of the time, it just flicks me off

56. My brain is constantly telling me that I’m a fuck up and the more I try to get it right, the more I keep getting it wrong

57. I am trying to master the art of letting go

58. And this list is a step towards better things

59. And this life is going to be alright

60. Without you, I am still me

61. Without you, I can still breathe

62. Without you, I am still alive

63. Without you, I am still poetry

64. I can barely remember your face, I guess being around a lot of different people at work helps out plenty

65. This world is filled with pain, I hope you look back and smile about us some day

66. Maybe when you’re old and grey– you’ll remember those two young kids who slow danced in the dark

67. If we were made from the same star, I want to return home some day

68. I want to shine bright enough for the two of us

69. You’re still my best friend even if we no longer talk

70. You’ll always be my best friend

71. I still care about you

72. A whole fucking lot

73. The world is full of mysteries, I’m glad that we’re in the known, I’m glad that we’ve met

74. I hope you never regret me, you wanna know why? I could never, ever, ever, ever regret you

75. I don’t know how to open up to people anymore and I’m not sure if it’s my fault or yours– maybe this one time, it’s our fault… are you like this too?

76. I’ve been told that I’m too hard on myself, I firmly believe that one of the reason as to why we split was because I wasn’t hard enough on myself– I got too fucking comfortable with your promises and I took you for granted

77. Life waits for no one

78. I let an ex of mine break my red and black ring– she said that if I was over you, I’d let her break. I let her break it, but jokes on me, it didn’t change a thing about how I still feel about you

79. I keep writing and writing and writing because one of these days– it’ll stop being about you

80. Sometimes it works, but deep down, I know in some way, you’ll always find a way to sneak back out

81. I can’t get you out of my head sometimes

82. It’s even harder because you’re still inside of my heart

83. I saw this cool picture on Tumblr with someone cutting a piece of herself off that resembled two lovers splitting up, that shit looked like it hurt

84. Love hurts because even eating cotton candy ice cream really fast will give you a brain freeze

85. You didn’t like my rat tail idea, I grew one out just to fuck with you. Jokes on me, I love it now.

86. You never really supported the idea of me being anything, tbh, it’s not your fault. None of it is. I should’ve been my own motivation. I guess by supporting you through nursing school, I wanted to hear you say that I could do it even when I was at my lowest point.

87. I realized a few thing about loving you.

88. When you hit rock bottom, few will be loyal enough to stick it out with you

89. Money rules the world, since I’m not wealthy in any way– one day when I am, I can laugh a little about all of this

90. I think you loved our memories more than you loved me, in truth, I did too

91. Maybe that’s why it’s hard to get close to people

92. Maybe that’s why it’s hard to let you go

93. Maybe that’s why you still read

94. We had something raw and experimental, young and dumb, mistakes on top of mistakes

95. It was a perfect compass to point us to our future selves

96. I know a great many things now– although I am depressed, with or without you

97. I am great, I am strong

98. I am my own happy before anyone else’s

99. I can love myself enough to let you go

100. I had to hurt you to really, really grow–
I think to this day, that’s the thing that hurts me the most. That I had to hurt my best friend in this whole wide world, to make you crumble, to make you cry, to make you hate me– I had to do all of that in order to love myself. And it’s sad because here I am, still trying to figure it all out.



With or without you, I will be a better person.
—  100 things I figured out when we broke up
Frustrations

A Sam & Dean x Reader / smut

HAPPY SMUT APPRECIATION DAY!

A/N: Here is my contribution for Smut Appreciation Day: Vol. 2. I can’t believe it’s been a year since the first epic day. I want all of you to tag me in your filth while I’m at work today, and I promise I will read ALL of them when I get home tonight. Please let me know what you think. Happy reading (and masturbating)!

Word Count: 3,615

Warnings:
- smut. this is very graphic.
- if you don’t like reading about sexual situations, abort now.
- this is a threesome and can also be viewed as a polyamorous relationship between Sam, Dean, and reader.
- there is no wincest in this fic.
- language.
- always wear a condom, kids!

Tags: (at the end)

*gifs are not mine.

The three of you were covered in mud from head to toe. This particular hunt had gone a bit south, due to the unexpected rainstorm that had decided to fuck with your mission. Dean protested the entire way home about the state his interior was currently in, constantly pestering both you and Sam to keep your boots off the floor. Although you’d accomplished what you’d sought out to do, all of you were bickering back at forth at one another like children the entire ride home.

Keep reading

Send To All

Originally posted by ohstylesno

Requested by anonymous:

“hey there! I don’t know if you’re still doing 1D requests but I was wondering if I could request a Harry Styles imagine?? idk if you know of it but there’s a comedian called michael mcintyre who has a chat show and he has a segment called ‘send to all’ where he sends a mass text from the guests phone and reads the replies - anyways I was wondering if you could do a request where the reader is a celebrity and secretly dating Harry and their relationship gets exposed or something through this?? xx”

Warnings: None?? tiny bit of language and fluff I suppose

Notes: This gif has no relevance it just fucking kills me omg (also I’m so excited to write for harry eek)


“Good luck love, I know you’ll be amazing as always. Thinking of you and can’t wait to finally hold you in my arms tomorrow. H x” 

You felt your heart constrict and a buzz fill your body, a smile tugging up on your lips as your eyes scanned over the text your boyfriend had just sent you. Your thumbs hovered anxiously over the keyboard as you mulled over what you should reply with. You had just decided on replying with words teasing him about how he signed his texts just like his tweets when you were interrupted. 

“*yn*, we’re ready for you.” 

Keep reading

The Only Exception (Part 5)

Summary: AU. Reader is given the task of running a popular love advice internet show when her coworker is fired. Her cynical attitude toward love makes her offer some harsh advice, and more than a few hearts are caught in the aftermath. Will hers be one of them?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Word Count: 3,844

Warnings: language, fluff, angst, sarcasm, hot firemen, draaaamaaaa, did i mention angst? this is getting ridiculous.

A/N: Cliffhangers are mostly unintentional. I got so many ACK HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO ME messages that I wanted to post the next part. Warning: it’s mostly just to move the plot along.

Part - 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 -

Originally posted by sebuttianstans

Keep reading

“Everyone Keeps Telling Me You’re The Bad Guy...”

Drabble Game - #19. Mark Tuan - Angst


Mark Tuan. Known around campus as the resident heartbreaker. It was obvious why. He was devastatingly handsome and charming. Once he set his sights on a girl, she was a goner. He would wine and dine them, get them into bed and then come up with some lame excuse as to why anything more serious just wouldn’t work.

Mark Tuan, the same one who had been assigned to be the subject of your behavioral analysis study for the last month, had his eyes on you now.

Keep reading

couple’s therapy // derek hale

summary : stiles is a bit concerned for the reader’s relationship with derek, driving him to host an impromptu couple’s therapy session with results that leave him only slightly mortified and very uncomfortable. 

  Derek wasn’t sure when the entirety of the McCall pack coming over once a week for what they called a “a pack meeting” had become a thing, but it certainly was a prominent event that wasn’t going away anytime soon. He had learned to accept it after the first two months, and now it was routine for you and Derek to prepare the loft every Friday afternoon for an evening of loud teenagers barging into your home only semi-uninvited. 

   This time around, you were both sitting quietly on the couch. Your eyes were drifting shut every once in awhile, but Derek would nudge you awake when you looked as if you were going to pass out. You were curled up on separate ends of the couch when Lydia, Scott, Stiles, Liam, Malia, and Kira burst through the door. You suspected that Stiles had replicated your key. You were greeted with a chorus of hello’s that you and your boyfriend answered in mumbled, sleepy tones. Stiles sauntered into the living room first, taking a seat between you and Derek and ripping open a package of cookies as loudly as he could. 

  Derek opened one eye, staring sideways at Stiles. “Do you mind?” 

  “Sharing? No, not at all!” Stiles shoved the cookies at Derek, who gave Stiles a dirty look before glancing away and settling comfortably back into his couch. Confused as to why you weren’t sleeping under Derek’s arm as you usually were, Stiles elbowed you in the ribcage. 

    “Um, ouch,” you muttered, shoving Stiles away. “Stop harassing older women, that’s not how you get a girl to go out with you. Lydia won’t love you if you act like this toward her.” You pushed Stiles again, sending him into Derek’s side and letting out a laugh when Derek growled, grabbing Stiles by the back of his shirt and sending him flying off the couch. 

    “Both of you are quite hostile tonight,” Stiles shook his head. “And you seem really distant toward each other. Anything going on?” 

    “Maybe we’re just tired,” Derek replied, yawning. You nodded with him, rubbing the sleep from your eyes. 

    Not convinced, Stiles continued, “Yeah, but you two are always so touchy feely with each other that if you were really, genuinely tired and not being distant on purpose than Y/N would be drooling on your shoulder right now and not on your nice pillows. For old people, you’re very affectionate.” The rest of the pack filed in, taking their seats on the floor and the other two chairs. 

   “I don’t drool,” you protested as Derek said, “We’re not old!”

   “See!” Stiles exclaimed. “You’re not even in tune with each other anymore. It’s sad. I’ve see this happen to the best of couples. It happened to Malia and I,” he pointed to his ex girlfriend with a sad look on his face before Malia scowled at him. He returned his only somewhat condescending stare back to you and Derek, looking at them almost pityingly. 

   “Stiles, what exactly are you implying?” Derek asked, folding his arms over his broad chest in an intimidating manner.  Unbothered, Stiles said, “I’m not implying anything, I’m stating that I think you and Y/N are drifting apart from each other and need some couple’s therapy. Luckily, I am proficient in giving advice and supplying people with statistics.” 

   “Since when does anyone listen to your advice?” Scott said with a laugh. Stiles sent his best friend a glare. 

    “Anyways,” Stiles said loudly, “Studies show that majority of happy couples are having sex at least twice a week. Now,” he turned to everyone as if he was a teacher, clearly delighted to have the attention on him, “as you should know from health class, sex releases endorphins, which increases the bond between a person and their partner. So, if you guys are being distant, it might be because you’re not going at it enough.

    Derek, holding back his laughter, reached over Stiles and squeezed your hand. You were practically about to burst, you were holding in your giggles so tightly. “Um, Stiles, I think it’s safe to say that the sex thing isn’t an issue.” 

   Adamant that he was correct, Stiles ignored him and continued talking, “I mean, you’re sitting on opposite ends of the couch. Y/N looks exhausted, and you, Derek, look dead, no offense. Clearly, you’ve been arguing. Probably screaming back and forth at each other for hours before we got here.” 

   You snickered, then said, “Yeah, I’d say there was definitely some screaming.” Lydia’s face went bright red at this comment as she finally realized what you were hinting at. Catching your attention, she made a gagging motion, causing you to laugh harder. Scott was the next to catch on, and he looked absolutely terrified. He poked Kira in the arm, explaining what was going on low enough so that Stiles couldn’t hear. Liam was filling Malia in on what was happening as well, but the poor boy appeared horrified at the doings of two people he considered to be second parents to him. 

    “Exactly!” Stiles snapped his fingers. “There lies the issue.” 

    “Stiles, I think the issue here is that you’re an idiot.” Derek smiled at him. 

    “Look, I’m just trying to help you guys,” he said defensively. “When couples stop being intimate with each other, it leads to eventual break ups, and divorce in the case of being married to the other person. I happen to think you and Y/N make a lovely couple, and it would be a shame to see your relationship end because you couldn’t face the facts.” 

   “Trust me on this, intimacy is not the reason we’re being so distant right now,” you informed the boy, patting his shoulder gently. 

    “Then what is?” He questioned impatiently. 

    “Well, kiddo,” Derek gripped Stiles’ other shoulder, “when I say that intimacy isn’t a problem, I mean that it really, really isn’t a problem. It’s probably the least of mine and Y/N’s worries, to be completely honest.” 

    Scrunching his nose, Stiles looked around at the flushed faces of his pack mates and the barely stifled smiles everyone had on their faces. “I- I don’t get it?” 

    Clearing your throat, you said, “Derek and I are already a pretty… intimate couple. So intimate, in fact, that the reason we’re being distant is because we’re actually kind of tired from, um, previous actions… if you catch my drift.” 

    Stiles at first still appeared confused, but when you and Derek began cracking up again, realization dawned in his eyes. The look of disgust on his face was enough to send you into a fit of laughter, practically falling onto the floor when the teenager jumped up from the couch, gagging and making an array of faces. 

    “You are disgusting,” he shuddered. “I cannot believe- how could you just… oh my god! You’re two old people having sex, I’m so grossed out right now I might cry, I’m just… Y/N, you’re like my big sister and you’re having sex and you just told me and you just had sex like an hour ago and now you’re tired from it and I’m actually going to puke now and maybe die okay goodnight!” With a last horrified glance at you and Derek, he practically sprinted out of the loft, practically in tears. 

    The rest of the pack filed out shortly after, tears of laughter in their eyes, and you apologized to Liam since he was the youngest and probably the most petrified- save for Stiles. After they were gone, you snuggled up next to Derek on the couch, resting your head on his shoulder. He kissed your head lightly, arm around your shoulders. 

    “What an enlightening couple’s therapy session, huh?” You joked, poking Derek’s side. He rolled his eyes again, as he always did when Stiles or anything to do with Stiles was mentioned. “Aw, c’mon, honey, it was pretty hilarious. I think I really learned a lot,” you laughed. 

   “Yeah, I learned that Stiles is dumber than I originally thought and that you have a really cute laugh,” Derek paused. “Actually, I knew that before, so I only learned one new thing today. I mean, everyone else caught on, even little Liam. And he’s, what, five?”  

    “Sixteen, Derek,” you patted your boyfriend’s chest. 

    “Same difference,” he said. “Anyways, maybe we could start being a little more intimate.” He winked at you, placing his hand on your cheek and turning your face toward him. 

    “Derek, we literally have sex every day, how much more intimate can we get?” You raised your eyebrows, letting out a squeal when Derek suddenly lifted you in the air, lips pressing against every area of your skin that he could reach as he said, “How does twice a day sound?” 

Hey!! Look what time it is! Time for a new teaser image for Hearts and Heroes!!

We wish we could have a bigger update for you but things have been slow since everyone has been really busy. People are starting to get small reprieves though so stuff on the game has started rolling again. We thank you so so much for your patience. 

We really wanted to get another teaser out to show you all that we are still here and we are still working. We are getting closer and closer every day. Today Judr and I (MGG) worked for nearly 6 hours on game stuff. 

We feel bad having you wait so long for the game but it is coming. Please send us any questions if you have any.

Thank you again for your support~

<3

Meant to Be - Part Ten: Stars

All Parts

Request: Soulmate AU – When soulmates draw on themselves, it appears on the other’s skin as well.

Tagging: @elenarte @empyrealsakaki @gum-and-chips @karenthepoop @hammytrashy @falling-open @bestfluteninja @urstupidmom @olympun @rebel-with-cause @mishaisakitten @depressionjoke @gemilton @ur-friendly-neighborhood-fangirl @regionallyblurredfaces @destiel-addict-forever @sxnyalxveshxrses@theinevitablesense @boiugotsmehalpless @rachurro @hamilton-of-issues @phantom10526 @feral-tomcat-hamilton @alonelynoodle @ilesserpanda@kyloslightsaberdick @msageofenlightenment @pentagramtardis @artisticgamer @smol-angery-bean @abbylikeschickennuggets @little-miss-vanilla @marquisdelargebagutte @cant-we-just-dance @commandergreysonpike @abbyg14 @ixhadbadxdays @iamindeedapotato @pipindaae @gad-jefferson @series-killerr @creepycute08 @viliantv@brienne-evenfall @sunshinerainbowunicorn @trickstrqueen @liv-livingafandomlife @gamzeenmakara @ham-for-ham @fruityfrootloops@canyoubemyfour @whimsicalfangirlthings @kakapo-the-owl-parrot @ssnips @iimnotyourson @theonethatscalledtay @k9effect@meagisnotamazing @lunahdeer @karoline-phantom @aham-threw-his-shot-away @arissanoddle @autistic-alien@aceplaysbass @bathtab @xthaynesxalcoholx @sovaiill @jamiltone @youreyesaretherealtruthtellers @artandshitposts @gold–cleaver @externallyandinternallyscreaming @iloveunicorns64

Word Count: 3228

Warnings: swearing, anxiety/panic attacks

Dedicated to: @limpblotter @feral-tomcat-hamilton and @lafilton for beta-reading my trash <3

okay and aaaah @theonethatscalledtay and @canyoubemyfour for their gorgeous fan art!!!

A/N: yIKES enjoy the angst


Alex calmed down as the day went on. Once his attack was over and his anxiety had decreased, he found he was ravenous. He was so hungry, in fact, that he practically devoured his sandwich in one gulp, pleasing Laf immensely. After he’d eaten, they all lounged about and talked for a few hours, just trying to enjoy the warm weather and one another’s company, with one notable exception; John remained almost completely silent and subdued, staring off into space.  

“Hey, you know what we haven’t done in forever?” Herc asked suddenly, ending a silence in which both Laf and Alex were trying to nap. Alex sat up groggily, rubbing at his eyes with his fist.

“What?” he demanded, his voice rough from tiredness.

Keep reading

How having an amazing teacher can change your life

Get ready for one long text post.

I started playing horn in seventh grade and I was really shy, like hopelessly shy. Playing in front of people was impossible for me. My middle school music teacher was annoyed by it, but didn’t do much to change it. So I just never played solos. Ever.

Then I started high school. It was horrifying walking into the music for the first practice. I was one of two horns in the entire school. The other one was in 11th grade so I was all alone in jr. Band. And then the music teacher walked in. And everything went down hill from there.

This man was the most egotistical person I’ve ever met. (We took coach buses everywhere we went cause it was good for our ‘image’, it’s uncommon to take a coach bus here) He didn’t care how bad he made us feel when we screwed up. If it wasn’t perfect he wasn’t happy, cause that meant we wouldn’t get gold at festival and that’s all he cared about. He made that very clear. I practiced so hard to be able to play the way he wanted me to. It only made my previous anxiety about playing worse. I cried so much during rehearsal and he didn’t care he just kept going and basically told me to get it together.

When band class started in second semester of that year. I couldn’t play in front of people without bursting into tears. My final solo was a disaster. After that, I wanted to put down my horn and never play again.

But I played again next year. He needed his horn player. I was “important to the integrity of the band” He convinced me to come back and It was a little better.

Until the musical started. We did into the woods as our musical and everyday after school for three months I had to deal with his need for perfection. I was told I wasn’t good enough, everyday for three months. It wasn’t a typical conductor saying we weren’t going to be ready to perform a piece. He said we were horrible. I started crying once and he told me to “get it together, real performers don’t cry” All he did was berate me and others. I hated myself.

When our longer weekend practices started we would break for half an hour for dinner. One day we were screwing one part up. He wouldn’t let us eat until we played it perfectly. By the time we did we had five minutes to shove food down our throats, or what was left of it after the cast ate anyway. It was the lowest I’d ever felt in my life. We are high school students, not professional players.

But then it all changed. For the better (thank god)

I moved about a year ago, just after we finished our musical and started at a new high school this year, so I had a new music teacher. I remember the first day walking into the music and instead of a gloomy, hateful atmosphere. It was loud and happy place and everyone was laughing and a shoe went flying through the air. I approached the music teacher and told her I play horn. She was giddy. She told me about all the bands they have at the school and about the music they play and stuff they do, and before I knew it I was going to fall music camp.

It was the most fun I’d ever had with music ever. I made so many friends and began to come out of my shell. She complemented my playing and instead of berating me when I played it wrong she would help me. She made me excited to play my instrument, something I hadn’t felt in two years. Recently for a solo in class, she brought in her own horn and played with me so I could hear how it sounded and felt. She nor any of my band mates made me feel horrible about myself again. I’ve only ever cried once at a rehearsal this year. I started to get way more confident. I can play when she calls on me. It’s hard to believe I’ve only been at this school for seven months.

I told my new teacher at the beginning of the year, right off the bat, I would never play a solo for her.

Today, at festival, I played a solo in front of a heck of a lot of people and an adjudicator.

I have no idea why I kept playing horn at my old school when he made me feel so bad about myself. But that doesn’t really matter now. I’m happy at my new school and really proud of how far I’ve come. It really goes to show you what the difference between a good and bad teacher can make for a student.

3 / 100 days of productivity

19 april, 2017

finished some french homework this morning! i also have french tutoring today which i’m not really looking forward to if i’m completely honest. starting on more biology notes again today even though i wrote 7 pages yesterday! notes aren’t looking as good as they could be but oh well.

This day kills me every year, no matter how long it has been. It started snowing when I woke up and I knew it was you. I know I will see you again one day, but I wish I could see you today. For now I feel like hiding under my blankets. Let the rest of the world race on, I’ll be here thinking of you.
—  K.N.B.
my thoughts on 5x20 (and why it’s better than 3x20)

WOW. I woke up, the sun was shining, my skin was clear, Olicity is rising and Arrow is back on top again. GOD BLESS. 

So I’m doing something different with this recap. Normally I just give bullet-point impressions of the ep. Today I’m doing bullet-point reasons of why I think this ep is better than 3x20. If you know me, then you know that 3x20 has long been my favorite Arrow episode. I had severe doubts that 5x20 could top it. Even when the spoilers started coming out. But then I saw 5x20. 

  • This episode had THRILLS. 
  • The way it started, with Felicity on the floor and Oliver scoping the bunker out with the gun?? Protective!Oliver is hot hot hot! 🔥
  • The way these two bickered in the present day was harsh and rough and absolutely appropriate given how 5x19 ended. 
  • It was also very married and adorable and them. They were more real with each other here than they were in 3x20, I hate to say. 
  • The flashbacks (which the title card said took place 11 months ago… but then MG said on Tumblr last night that he felt it took place closer to 5x01 than it did 4x23 so… basically… somewhere in the summer. Let’s say LATE AUGUST and call it a day) were so full of tension-laden chemistry that I about burst into flames during that scene with Felicity cooing over his boo-boo on his arm. 
  • Yeah that’s another reason 5x20 >>>> 3x20: the flashbacks. Olicity focused flashbacks beat s3 Hong Kong flashbacks any day. 
  • Olicity was so much of this episode. And anything that wasn’t Olicity was the team trying to save Olicity. And Dyla working out their shit. That sure beats Lazarus Pit resurrection and joining the LoA if you ask me. 
  • Oliver and Felicity having a picnic on the mats, eating take-out and drinking two (2!!!) bottles of wine is basically fanfic. ITS FANFIC. 
  • Oliver coaching Felicity on how to do the salmon ladder is also FANFIC. 
  • Oliver demonstrating for Felicity is basically the most preening show pony he’s ever been and I’m here for it. So is she. 
  • As demonstrated by her jumping him with a kiss right after. You get him, girl! 
  • Okay, I’m not sure a love scene this hot on network tv during the 8pm hour is allowed. 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
  • But it’s also fun? Cuz they’re enjoying themselves and each other? And tender? Cuz of all the hearteyes? How is this better than 3x20? I don’t know but it IS. It feels… righter. 
  • Also: full-on “morning after” scene where they’re cuddled up NAKED together on the mats. NAKED. NAAAAKEEEEED. 
  • They want me dead. That’s all there is to say. This cuddling is TOO MUCH. 
  • Of course then things have to get real with Felicity saying it doesn’t mean anything. Oliver’s eyes are saying “excuse you, it meant A LOT to me!”
  • Also: “it was nice”. GIRL PLEASE. It was more than nice. Oliver, you’re not gonna take that lying down are you? Show your girl what “nice” really is. 🔥🔥🔥🔥
  • Or…. save it for the reunion sex. I wouldn’t mind that. 
  • (this said, I still am not convinced we’ll get reunion sex… are we that lucky? i have my doubts)
  • BUT Felicity was right to say what she did. And she did give Oliver and opening. Figure your shit out and get back to me. 
  • Newsflash: he didn’t get back to her. 🤦‍♀️
  • BUT! The present day shows them finally talking this shit out. The shit they should have talked out an EON ago. 
  • Oliver trusts her, he will always trust her. He doesn’t trust himself. He’s not sure if he’s a monster or a hero. 
  • The tear when he told her this nearly murdered me. Death by tear. 
  • Felicity is sure he’s a hero, but he has to believe it. But when he does… it’s ON. 
  • In case you’re concerned: this ties Olicity’s fate with the main conflict of the season. Once Oliver has what he needs to defeat Chase, he will have what he needs to reunite with Felicity. 
  • So if you’re one of those people who keeps sending me anons, step away from the ask box and read one of my posts. THEY ARE REUNITING IN S5. 5x20 CONFIRMED IT. Stop asking me if I still think they’re reuniting. 😂 It’s obvious that I do! 
  • Where was I? OH YES. Okay, so 3x20 ended with Olicity separated and Oliver selling his soul to the LoA. 5x20 ended with hope for our favorite pair reuniting (and for good this time). 
  • Is there any comparison? I don’t think so. 
  • Also, Chase approaching William. I am officially shook. 

God bless this episode. And god bless Olicity. This is my ship. The stunts, the arguments, the selfless acts of heroism, the heart to heart conversations… this is why I’m here. 

Need A Hug

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Warnings: none (some angst maybe?) 

Word count: 877

Summary: Ever feel like you need a hug? Well, Jensen is there to help.

A/N: This is written for the lovely @bringmesomepie56. This is also my first time writing Jensen so be gentle with me guys!

Originally posted by lovershub

On some days you wake up with a bad feeling. You start your day not feeling well but you ignore it. You don’t think about it and continue on. Sometimes that feeling passes but sometimes it doesn’t. Sometimes it escorts you through every minute of your day and it clings onto you for dear life. Today had been a day like that and you regretted not staying home.

You let out a loud sigh when entering the apartment you and Jensen were living in together. Literally everything that could’ve gone wrong today somehow managed to go wrong. Your day had been a perfect example for Murphy’s Law.

You had never thought the sentence “Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.” could be more accurate. Here you were, still standing at in the hallway of your apartment with your purse laying by your feet.

Keep reading

Muse - “No Skills”

hi guys!!! here’s the next part to the series :) (aka part 2 to this post)

i’m about to put a link to a masterlist so it’ll be easier to navigate (masterlist with a grand total of 2 pieces)

ANOTHER HEIGHTS REFERENCE TITLE i know guys it’ll make sense the further along we get (unless ur already onto me)

anyways - like i said i am a newbie so any and all feedback is appreciated (roast me if u want)

summary: man, he was cute. right? he was so cute! he was sweet and tall and so so so cute and his name was… oh my god what was his name?

word count: 3150+ lmao

warnings: swearing bc i’m a sinner and even more motherfucking smiling (lin’s smile makes me weak in the knees and that translates in2 my work sorry about it)

oh god here we go

Keep reading

Yoongi Scenario: Say Yes To The Dress.

Request: Yay, your requests are open❤️ I’ve been binge-watching a show called Say Yes To The Dress and I was wondering if I may request a Yoongi senario where he comes with you to pick your wedding dress along with the members? Yoongi is my favorite member, he’s so pretty TT^TT

Genre: Fluff / Romance.


Your appointment was set for early in the afternoon, so after lunch you had been fuzzing around with your outfit, hair and make up. Going to buy your dress at Bridals had been your dream for as long as you could remember, so after you found out Bridals had opened a branch in Seoul you decided you had to go.

-Y/N, anyone would believe the wedding is today-

Your fiancé, the funny guy who at the moment wasn’t funny, was staring at you from your bed. 

You huffed, trying to rearrange your hair differently since the up-do you were attempting made you look old. -I just want to get this right- you said more to yourself than him.

Yoongi sat watching you from the mirror to then stand up, going to you to hug you from the back. His face was semi buried on a side of your neck and his arms wrapped around your waist.

-It’s going to be ok, you look beautiful-

You pouted staring at your reflection, placing your hands over his. You were nervous as you were excited, this was an important occasion for you, but Yoongi’s presence made it all better, he held you when you needed it, and not just physically, Yoongi was always willing to take care of you even if sometimes it was in his own slightly shy ways. 

A little smile bloomed thinking about it, you loved your boyfriend too much and you couldn’t wait to be his wife.

For the appointment you knew you could take people with you, usually girls went with their mom, mother in law, the bridesmaids, sisters, etc. But for you it was a bit different than that.
The host looked at you and back at your companions with wide eyes, surely she didn’t expect to receive a bride with seven men trailing after her.

-This is a first- she said with a nervous giggle, registering you while the team that would be assisting you arrived. You smiled at Yoongi who nodded in reassurance, then you saw the other six companions for the day, since your family couldn’t be here, you had decided that who better for the occasion than the six boys that had become over the time important and indispensable people in your life, so much you could call them family, these days required a support system and honest opinions and you knew that was what you were going to get from them.

The consultant that would be assisting you arrived, she was the Lori of Seoul, in her fifties, short hair and a classy outfit but with an expression that was gentle but yet awake. 

-Welcome to Bridals, my name is Nara-

You bowed and so did the boys, but it was you doing the talking since this was after all your day. -Hello, I’m Y/N, thank you for having us today-

You noticed behind Nara there were two younger women, surely the assistants for fitting and for searching the dress. -It’s our pleasure, so who is coming with you today?- she asked looking at the boys sharply. -I heard they are singers-

You nodded. -Yes, that was why I requested the privacy…- Nara made a hand gesture for you to not worry about that at all, so you smiled a little. -These are Kim Namjoon, Kim Seokjin, Park Jimin, Jeon Jungkook, Jung Hoseok, Kim Taehyung- you went saying their names as they greeted and bowed politely. -And this in my fiancé, Min Yoongi-

The two assistant gasped and Nara took a hand to her chest. -We have a fox in the henhouse!-

Keep reading

some ...angst anyone?

can we have a scenario where Izuku just ACCIDENTALLY brought up the bullying case to Katsuki while they are fighting (bc my bby cinammon roll is in too much hurt cause bakacchan kept shouting at him) 

——-

They’re at it again.

And they’re yelling over something stupid.  They can’t even remember how it started, or who said what first, but they can’t stop. They won’t stop, because that’s how their arguments always go.

Katsuki is wrong. Izuku is also wrong. They’re both in the wrong, but they keep yelling, because until they’re sick and tired, and can’t look at each other anymore,  they won’t stop.

Katsuki is closing the space between him and Izuku then, as he raises his voice louder. “ …And you act like its not a fucking problem! ”

Because it isn’t, really.

“Why should I?? It’s not anything you need to be worried about!  Why are you getting so angry??” Izuku presses his brows together and he inches himself toward the other. Their faces  are close,  they can feel the tense air between them as they glare into each other’s eyes.

Breaths heaving in annoyance and distress, they continue to stare each other down. Katsuki being unable to hold his anger well, opens his mouth again.

“Are you dumb, Deku?? Are you seriously askin why I’m angry? ”

And he reaches a hand out– he grabs onto Izuku’s wrist, and he regrets it right away, when he sees the sudden horror that forms in the latter’s green eyes. Because thats fear written on his face.

No, he doesn’t want to scare Izuku. Even if he did take his wrist, it wasn’t going to be to hurt him.

It isn’t bad intentions at all. He just wants to hold onto Izuku– Hold onto him tightly so he can’t run away. So they can argue their way through this dumb misunderstanding and pretend like it never happened, or laugh about it later.

“S..stop Kacchan!” Izuku snatches his wrist back and moves a few steps back.

“Deku–”

“Why are you acting this way- what were you going to do? Knock some sense into me like before?”

Then his mouth shuts instantly, and its his turn to feel regret. He swallows hard and suddenly his anger is gone. It dissipates faster than the blink of an eye, because Katsuki is just staring at him. There’s a hint of saddness and something close to realization painted all over his face. “K-Kacchan I didn’t mean-”

“So you think I’d do that? ” Katsuki isn’t yelling anymore.  Just speaking softly, more to himself than his boyfriend.  “You really think I’d throw a punch at your fuckin face..?”

“No. Kacchan, I didn’t mean that. I didn’t mean to say that.” Izuku’s voice is pleading, and it only becomes more weary when he sees tears beginning to wet Katsuki’s cheeks. “Kacchan, please-”

“I see. Okay. Whatever.”

Izuku is begging him more, hoping he can erase what he just said, but Katsuki is ignoring him,  brushing him off while he puts his shoes on.

Then he leaves.

 

And Izuku is sitting alone in the house now,  going through the argument that just happened, in his head.  Why did it start?  How did it escalate this far? Why would he say something like that?

Because he knows Katsuki. He loves Katsuki. He trusts him. So why did he draw back in fear? And why did he bring up the past?

Izuku hates himself more than anything right now.. he doesn’t know what to do but wait for Katsuki to come back. He has to eventually, doesn’t he? They live together. They argue all the time. Its just what goes with clashing peronalities, doesnt it? So Katsuki will come back. And Izuku will mend things.

But he doesn’t come back. Not until at least 4 am, anyway. Izuku had made his bed on the sofa, waiting for his significant other to return.

When Katsuki walks through the front door he looks at Izuku before going straight to the bedroom.  He’s tired, hes stressed, he’s cried all self hatred and anger out,  so he’s ready to talk to Izuku when he wakes. Of course, it occurs faster than he thought.

The sound of the open and close of the doors in the house stir Izuku enough to wake him. And he sits up rather quickly, searching in the darkness for the familiar face.

“Kacchan..” His voice is soft, when he enters the room, and Katsuki lifts his gaze from his hands to the other. Izuku keeps his distance, while he watches. “..Kacchan..I’m really–”

“Deku. I’ve thought things through.”

There’s silence between them. Its only a few moments,  but to Izuku it feels like an eternity. “..We should break up. ”

Suddenly everything is going blurry. Izuku blinks his eyes once, trying to clear his vision–blinks again, because its still all a blur. When he blinks a third time, thats when he feels the hot tears start spilling down his cheeks and he realizes that he’s crying. 

Katsuki is avoiding eye contact as he speaks.  “Clearly we don’t trust each other as much as we thought.  I don’t blame you.  I hurt you so fuckin bad before. I thought you were crazy for even wanting to date me. I thought things could really work between us.. But you made it kinda obvious today that there’s still distrust and uncertainty.  So.. yeah. We should just end it now. There’s others that’re more deserving of you. Todoroki likes you.  Mirio does. Iida, might.  You got an endless list really. So do you really need me?”

There’s more silence. Katsuki is rubbing at his neck slowly, keeping on his ‘cool’ act. Though he can only manage to keep it up as long as he looks anywhere but at the one before him.

“No.. No,  Kacchan, please..” Izuku says between sobs. His hands are up against his face, so his words are coming out muffled. “I don’t want you to leave-I don’t want to leave you! I’m sorry for what I said,  I don’t know what made me say it!” He coughs a bit,  before continuing. “I love you. I trust you-  I didn’t mean to hurt you.. when we argue, sometimes I can’t help but remember back then. And it isn’t because I don’t trust you,  its just out of habit.. and when I said what I did.. It was stupid.  I’m stupid!” He shakes his head pulls his hands away from his face, finally looking at Katsuki. “Im so sorry.. I’m an idiot..”

Katsuki is watching him now. And he’d be a huge liar if he said it didn’t hurt to see Izuku crying like that. He can’t help but think he’s taking things too far, but despite Izuku apologizing now, he had to have meant what he said.  He doesn’t have the trust Katsuki thought he did. He’s afraid that Katsuki will hurt him. He thinks Katsuki will turn back to what he was.

“..Sorry, Deku.” He says. “..I just think it’d be better to stay apart.”

He leaves it at that.

Izuku continues trying to talk to him–trying to make things right.  He has to fix what he broke, because surely this isnt going to be their last fight. Katsuki is only saying this because he’s upset. They’re going to fix it– Izuku is going to fix it.

But days start to pass, and they don’t see each other.

Katsuki took majority of his things and left. He’s staying with Kirishima, and despite Izuku’s efforts to talk to him, there’s no luck.

Weeks pass.

There’s not a moment when Izuku isn’t thinking about Katsuki, and vice versa. Izuku is starting to lose hope, starting to think that its really over.

 

He’s sitting on his own in the living room one evening, when he hears a knock on the door. He stands himself up,  expecting Ochako to be there because he had invited her over for a bit. ( Anything to help get his mind off things.)

But when he opens that door and looks,it isn’t her.

Izuku’s eyes widen slightly, tears starting to fill them.

Katsuki is standing there, bag slinging over his shoulder. He’s looking down at the ground, trying to figure out what words to say.

“Deku.” He adjusts his stance,  before glancing up finally.  “…Deku, I’m sorry.. I was being a bastard by ignoring you. I love you … do you wanna take me back?”

Izuku isn’t wasting another moment before his arms are thrown around the other.   He’s letting out a sob,  as he buries his face into Katsuki’s chest. “D-don’t apologize-  its all my fault!  I hurt you and I’m the one who should be sorry–”

“Shh..” Katsuki lifts a hand up and sets it into the curly green locks,  stroking them gently.  “We both were wrong.. and.. After takin time to think about it,  I realized if you’re still feelin afraid it isn’t your fault.. you’re doin your best.  And that just means.. I gotta try harder too. We’re gonna get better.”

Izuku nods,  sniffling. A small smile forms on his lips and his voice is muffled.

“Okay, Kacchan.. okay… I love you. I’m sorry..”

“Me too.. I’m sorry and I love you too.” Then he kisses the top of his head.