Some doodles I did on the side yesterday night ( @blesstale drew Zunde that there ) including Dreby taking his first steps. I saw this kid screaming “NOOOO!” at some meat in a grocery store before running to his mom, so there we go ✌️
Have you ever loved someone so much it hurt, mentally, physically, and emotionally hurt? You can’t imagine your life without them & one day they’re gone. Gone forever. Not in the sense that they’re dead. But dead inside? They’re not the person that they used to be. They don’t notice you exist anymore. You’ve spent countless years with this person. Watching movies together, hanging out every weekend, getting rides together. Then one day they leave you. Just like they’ve done before. You’re so hurt by this so you decide to tell them how you feel. For the first time you put yourself out there just to get stomped on. To feel broken. They pick other people over the person they said they’d never leave. You say things you can never take back. Just to realize how big of a mistake it really was. Not that you shared how you felt, but they didn’t accept it. They didn’t understand. They didn’t understand how they could hurt you by acting like you’re no longer their friend. Like you don’t matter to them anymore. And they think that u don’t love them but the truth is you love them too much. They blame you for taking medicine . You can’t help you have a mental disorder. You can’t help you think of dying 24/7. You can’t help that the one person you thought would understand you has left.
8 months go by.
You say 20 words to each other
They’ve moved on. To “better” friends and no longer think about you at all anymore. Until one day. You guys hang out again. For a couple of hours. And you can’t help but get false hope. Maybe things will go back to normal. Maybe we can be best friends again. But in the back of your mind, you know you can’t be so foolish. 8 months has changed this person. They’re no longer like you. You couldn’t be more opposite of each other now. You have different values. They don’t value anything. Not even you anymore. You can’t help but sympathize for this person because you love them still. Too much. But you can’t help but feel like they’re using you. Now it been almost a year since the first fall out. You’ve changed so much. But you’re alone . You talk to your ‘friend’ about once a week now. You can’t help but feel used. She doesn’t need you anymore. And that’s when you realize. The only person you have is yourself. The only person you can rely on is yourself. People will leave. Don’t put your happiness in other people. They’ll drop it. Every. Single. Time.
Three years later and I still can’t let this go.