idk. i'm trying to tag for anything that this might bring up

anonymous asked:

I'm pretty sure most "anti-anti" discourse will ultimately just be used as a tool to deflect any and all criticism, or to accuse critics of being terrible people themselves. Especially with you all patting yourselves on the back about how morally superior you are.

deflect criticism of what? fanworks?

Hm. I can see how it might be easy to conclude that, depending on your previous fandom experiences, but I have to disagree on the whole.

To be perfectly honest, my gut reaction to this ask was ‘this sounds like projection’ because this ask is a list of things anti-shippers do.  Anti-shippers regularly deflect any and all criticism of their behavior and harassing tactics by exercising logical debate fallacies, accuse critics of being terrible people by accusing them of supporting or participating in rape/pedophilia/incest/abuse irl, and pat each other on the back for how morally superior they are to those nasty [insert nasty name-of-the-week for bad shippers here].  And maybe you’re referring to ‘anti-antis’ who go after antis with the same intimidation and harassment tactics that anti-shippers use, purposely retaliating with similar behavior.  (I don’t condone that shit, or people who send nasty anons to antis (suicide bait tw), or anything else that involves abusing another person.)

What is ‘anti-anti discourse’ in this instance? I’m going to guess you mean ‘telling people it’s okay to ship what they like, write what they like, and do fandom how they like, even if others find their ships and fanworks to be uncomfortable’.  In other words, advocating for fandom to stop weighing content on its moral value or kid-friendliness.

If you come from the school of thought that fandom must be made across-the-board ‘safe’* by no longer allowing fans to create or share headcanons, theories, or fanworks that contain amoral, dark, or nsfw content, I can see why the ‘ship what you like/your kink is not my kink and that’s okay/just tag your shit and do whatever’ attitude towards fandom feels like it’s setting up for all criticism to be ignored.  If your frame of reference for fandom is evaluating everything on how safe and moral it is, saying ‘actually, everything is permissible in fiction’ means there’s nothing you can possibly criticize. 

But fandom didn’t wait for morality and social justice to become the centerpiece to criticize fanworks and fan spaces; we used the original canon and liberal values as our ammunition instead of purity points.  We wrote long meta about why slashfic was bad, then about why slashfic was good, then about why mlm fic was so much more popular and common than wlw fic, then about how to write mlm fic in realistic/respectful ways. We’ve debated repeatedly on what’s appropriate to write about and what isn’t, and if we need to cross decency lines, how do we protect people who don’t want to see it?  We’ve had massive ship wars over which ship was more canon (instead of which ship was more moral, and thus most deserves to be canon).  Nor did we wait for current minors to complain about adults to figure out ways to make fandom spaces safer for people to navigate. We created tagging systems to help people avoid content that disgusted or harmed them.  We then criticized each other’s tag usage and demanded more and more specific tags to help us weed out fics that would squick us (or find fics that hit the right kinks).  We created 18+ only spaces on our geocities websites and mailing lists, and locked 18+ content on our Livejournals so that underage people who wanted to get access had to lie about their ages, knowing that what they were about to encounter was not intended for them.  (figuring out how to make this work on web 2.0, designed to bring us all the content no matter what, has been very difficult.)

But mainly, we just assumed everybody was on the same page about real world morals: incest irl was bad, dating a minor irl if you were an adult was bad, abuse of any kind irl was bad. We might debate about how to respect the online spaces of others, but we didn’t doubt that everyone knew these things were shitty.**

You’ll notice some of these debate points aren’t that different from what antis and shippers ‘debate’ today. But when we debated these things without assuming that the morals of people with opposing views were fundamentally fucked up, it allowed a much more open, nuanced dialogue because people weren’t on their guard, waiting to be personally attacked. When we stopped treating ships and kinks as personal preferences but rather as personal value statements, we lost the ability to have nuanced conversations about the underlying reasons these ship types and kink types were so prevalent.

I can never reply without writing a novel, can I? But my point is this: ‘Anti-anti discourse’ doesn’t stop people from critiquing fanworks, or figuring out ways to make fandom safer for both teens and adults, or talking about the potential harm that dark content can cause. By asserting that deeply personal things like what kind of romantic dynamic pings you or what sexual kinks you have are personal, and you are free to indulge that (and others are free to avoid/ignore it), it actually makes fandom criticism less loaded, more nuanced, and more enriching, letting everyone think for themselves instead of being scared into silence.

PS - I’m so curious why you say anti-antis are ‘patting each other on the back for moral superiority’. Do you think I feel morally superior because I don’t direct personal attacks at anti-shippers? Is ‘patting each other on the back’ the act of reblogging from others because you agree with them? Or is it something else?

Cause I’ll tell you what: I don’t really care about the moral superiority of anybody.   All I care about is people taking the time to be just and kind to one another. And I’m trying to do that myself (though who knows how much I succeed).

*’safe’ in scare quotes here because I so entirely disagree with the concept of a heavily censored space being ‘safe’ that I have to point out this is really, really not safe by using scare quotes.

**And maybe that assumption was a bit of a blind spot - a generation gap between fans who grew up without the internet and fans who grew up with it.

A year ago, I had just finished year 11. My GCSEs were over and I had the summer to overthink how I had done. That was scary enough. Add on the whole ‘A-Levels are a thing that will happen’ thing and you have one messy Lily.

I have not handled the last year well, for many reasons, but partly because of things I wish I had known about A-Levels – things I hope I can share with you now.

1.        Organisation is key!

All throughout secondary school I had a book for each subject – we all did. All my notes were in one place with all the 98698239857352 sheets of paper the teachers handed out. I knew where things were.

At college, we use folders and loose paper. Now, a year’s worth of class notes are in various piles around my house. I don’t know where anything is and when it came to revising, I had to remake resources simply because I couldn’t find them.

It’s important to remember that when teachers say you need to have organised folders, they mean it! If I had just spent 5 minutes when I got back home putting the day’s notes in folders, I would have saved hours and hours of valuable time later on.

Also, a planner or diary is a very helpful thing to have! You will be given dates and times and due dates and work to do, and you won’t be told to ‘write it down in your school planner’ anymore. It is now your responsibility to know what is happening. If you don’t know, you have to ask. Ask other people on your course or email your teacher. Just make sure you know, because your teachers won’t care if you ‘weren’t here when it was set’.

2.      Freedom is scary

Regardless of whether you are going to a college or a sixth form, you will find yourself being more independent. A lot of this comes about through your timetable. You might find yourself having several hours a day without a lesson. I wish I’d learnt to use this time more wisely, rather than going to Starbucks with my friends.

You will be expected to do work outside of class – not just in the form of homework. If you don’t do the work they set, it’s on you. You will no longer be pushed to do it and won’t get chased if you don’t. You have to do that bit yourself – just don’t push too hard!

3.      If you need help, you need to ask.

If you are struggling or finding your courses difficult, it is important to talk to/email someone as soon as you can – whether it be your tutor or your subject teachers. They are not psychic, and they will not know to help you if you do not ask for it. It can be scary, but I guarantee that it’s worth it. You’ll probably be surprised by how lovely they are and by how much they’re willing to help.

4.      It’s okay if you don’t know anyone – you will soon!

Your school aren’t lying when they say you will make friends. A lot of the time, you don’t even have to try. It just happens!

 5.      There is no bell!

There is no longer a bell to indicate the end of a lesson or the end of the day. If you have a lesson, you have to look at a clock in order to know when to go. It’s helpful to have an app or a piece of paper with your timetable on it, so you know what order they come in.

In the first few weeks, you won’t know where any of your lessons are, and that’s ok. The teachers are very understanding of this and won’t care if you are late because you are trying to find your classroom! If you really don’t know where to go, ask someone. There are very few people who will not help.

6.      Catching up on missed work is so important

There will inevitably be days where you miss school. Some people will only miss a few each year and some people, like me, will miss many many more. If you are not going to be in for any reason, it is so so so important to email your teachers and ask for the missed work. They will not give it to you otherwise, and you will regret it and quite quickly feel the consequences. Generally, lessons include an awful lot of content – content that will ultimately make everything more difficult if you don’t learn. If you have missed work, you will need to find the time to catch up. Otherwise, you’ll end up like me and you’ll get to revision knowing that you have missed massive chunks of the course.

7.      Don’t leave things until the last minute

This is the most important thing I will never learn to do. I am a serial offender when it comes to procrastinating (hence ‘procrastilate’).

I found it impossible not to, but I feel my year would have been a lot easier had I not left everything until as late as I possibly could.

If you get set work, write it down and start it when you get home. Yes, you could be binge watching TV or playing The Sims, but that can wait. It can wait more than you think your work can. If you can’t handle the distractions at home, do the work during your free lessons! That way you’re near any resources you might need, and it means you can do whatever you want in the evening.


And as an extra, here are some bits that don’t need a paragraph

·         Bring headphones – people are loud

·         Bring your phone charger – you will probably use your phone more than you expect

·         A-levels are hard - sorry

·         Reading what you will do in the textbook before a lesson is a great idea

·         You might be able to wear what you want, but that doesn’t mean anyone cares about your appearance – they don’t

·         Dropping a subject is ok

·         IT WILL BE OK


just a quick point to say that you can always message me if you need any advice or have any questions. I am more than happy to help, I just can’t guarantee I’ll be very helpful :)) 

Dating Steve Rogers Headcanons

Originally posted by my-avengers-imagines

A/N: So I haven’t written anything in a while but I had some time today & decided to give this a try, I actually had a lot of fun writing it. I also have written one for Bucky and am working on one for Sam, if you feel like it, tell me your thoughts? I kinda tried to make it different than anything I’ve read around here before. I’d appreciate feedback a whole lot 

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anonymous asked:

please write the type of boyfriend you think ash would be

Personally, I believe Ashton is a very open-minded person, generally speaking (at least from what I’ve gathered about him). He’s very expressive with his emotions and gratitude towards fans, shares things he finds cool or interesting on social media like the street art he posts on Instagram and having his Spotify account public, and he seems like the most fearless boy in the band about speaking about controversial topics within the 5sos fandom. That being said, I believe he’d be very passionate in the way he shows his interest in you and shares his affection with you to everyone else. 

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colorfulstormcloud  asked:

uwaaah I just followed today but I really like your blog!! It's really cute can I just *hugs you* Can I ask for a scenario where the boys Leadn about their s/o's anxiety and depression by waking on them in the middle on a panic attack-? I have terrible anxiety and depression and kinda need comfort if that is alright- thank you so much and have a wonderful day sweetie-

(i’m so sooo sorry for the long wait on this one, hon, but thank you for your kind words. ;o; i don’t deserve them. but you can have all the hugs, dear. *hugs you back* and it’s more than alright to ask for comfort when you need it; i hope that this helps.)

Osomatsu: he’d be shocked at first, but he’d come in and immediately be at your side. it’d be one of his few moments where he actually shows great maturity and he’d be right there with you, giving you lots soothing words, like: “you’re okay. i’m here for you, and you’re going to be just fine. i know it seems scary right now, and you have every right to feel this way, but you’re so brave, i know you can handle this. and you aren’t handling this alone, alright? i’m not leaving you, i’m right here with you.” he’d also gives you lots of pats on the back and let you snuggle into his chest, if you’re okay with that.

Karamatsu: this boy gets so worried/scared that nearly starts to flip out himself, but he soon realizes that doing that would be exactly the opposite of helpful. so he also sits by you and asks if you need anything at all. water? blankets? hugs? anything at all, you name it and he’ll get it for you, even if he has to go to hell and back for it (which he most likely won’t for a cup of water or whatever, but you know, it’s the thought that counts). after that, he’d pull up his guitar and start to play a little song for you. something soothing and relaxing and sweet to distract you from your thoughts.

Choromatsu: similar to Kara, he nearly starts to lose it himself at first. he isn’t too experienced with this, so he might try at first to ask you what’s wrong and what the matter is, but he’d soon figure out that asking those questions and freaking out at a time like this helps no one. so instead, he calms himself down and starts to focus on your elevated breathing; doing slow, deep breathing exercises with you to help you regain control of your breathing and calm down a little. all the while, he’d squeeze your hand and breath with you, to remind you that you aren’t facing this alone. after you’ve calmed down more, he might try to ask you again if you feel like talking about whatever is bothering you, but he also tells you that you don’t have to share if you don’t feel like talking about it.

Ichimatsu: he is not very good with his words at all, so if he sees you, he wouldn’t say anything to you. not that he isn’t concerned, however. he just doesn’t know what to say. so he shows his care for you in his actions instead. he sits with you and keeps you company, so that you don’t have to go through this alone. and he brings you: so. many. cats. petting animals has been scientifically proven to reduce blood pressure, you know? so the two of you pet all the cute cats together until you start to calm down. then, if (and only if) you feel like talking about whatever it was that was giving you so much anxiety, he’d be happy to listen. no pressure, though.

Jyushimatsu: he wouldn’t really know what to do other than whatever it is he’d normally do if he saw someone he cares about was sad, and that’s to try and make you laugh. he’d try to grab your attention and pull off all these silly gags and weird little stunts in hopes of getting a smile out of you. even if you’re in no mood to laugh at the moment, he still provides ample distraction from your thoughts and the fact that he’s trying his best for you anyway if soothing in its own right. (he’d also be happy to cuddle your face off, if you find that comforting.)

Todomatsu: he has no experience with this and really doesn’t know what to do, but he’s worried and he cares about you so much that he tries his best for you anyway. he’d try to give you a couple soothing words, like “shh no no, don’t cry, it’s okay. everything’s going to be just fine, okay? believe me. i’m right here, it’s okay.” and he’d try to touch you, if you’re okay with that. like, he’d rub your back gently and hold your hand. or he’d just hold you tight, if that’s what you prefer. he’s a little awkward, but his efforts really do mean a lot.

Am I Your Fire, Your One Desire [fic]

a/n: hey, guys! This is a fic dedicated to @iwillove for Christmas, even though I’m super late with it. Hope you like it, Isabella. The title is from I Want It That Way by Backstreet Boys. 

I also wanna thank @zoenightstars @bellamyisinlovewithclarke and @gypsytrickz for reading through it for me because I was really apprehensive about this one. I also wanna say that it’s not medically correct lol sorry

–1222016–

Tell me why

Ain’t nothin’ but a heartache

Tell me why

Ain’t nothin’ but a mistake

Tell me why

I never wanna hear you—

Annabeth ripped the radio’s cord out of the socket and tossed it against the opposite wall, watching through blurry eyes as it shattered into several pieces. The music stopped abruptly, and her chest was heaving with breath as she tried to make her heartbeat slow down. She felt like she was going to be sick. She felt like—

She gripped the sink counter until her hands started sweating and her arms started shaking.

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souls yet to be found; ii. (yoonmin)

Continued adventures of ghost!Yoongi and his human friend Jimin AU, with the first scenario based off of this post and the next two my own. 

Click here to read the first part of this AU.

-

iv.

There is a Ouija board sitting on the kitchen table.

Jimin blinks, staring in confusion at Yoongi who is seated right in front of the Ouija board and chattering enthusiastically to… well, no one. At least, no one Jimin can see. Truth be told, the younger is quite surprised to find the usually grumpy and quiet ghost looking so happy and full of life (excuse the irony). He nearly expects it to be some sort of weird dream that he’s having when Yoongi suddenly looks up from his seemingly interesting conversation with the air and calls out happily, “Jimin! Come here!”

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heat of the moment

author: me aka macy

desc: Dean catches Cas reading his journal

genre: angst, fluff, uhhh idk if u’d classify it under smut or not cause nothing’s really very graphic but it’s mentioned, also there’s a little tiny bit of grace!kink in here ur welcome:)

word count: roughly 2.4k

warnings: sex is mentioned but like I said it’s really not graphic

this is my first ever fic go easy on me please !!
——————————

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anonymous asked:

Prompt: Robin and Hungover Regina

I actually cheated and just did ‘Regina getting drunk.’ This prompt is so old you probably don’t even remember sending it anyway.

—-

She probably shouldn’t be this drunk. Actually, she knows she shouldn’t, she knows that in the morning she’s going to have the headache from hell that she’ll pretend isn’t too bad just to get through the day. She’ll go to bed tomorrow night right after work and be awake by four a.m. But right now she’s taking another shot of tequila while Robin sits beside her. His glass of whisky hasn’t been touched, and she glances over at him.

“Is the glass for decoration or are you drinking?”

Her words leave her in a tone she never uses with him, but her edges are frayed, he can see the gossamer threads of guilt wrapping tightly around her, and he merely shakes his head. “It’s a fine brand, I’ve been told. I’ll savor it.” In truth, once he realized how far gone she was, he’d decided not to try and catch up with her.

“If that old wolf made you believe anything about the booze here is ‘fine’ then…” Regina merely snorts instead of finishing her insult, pouring more tequila in her glass. She is never drunk. She in fact hasn’t done this since the night David left with Henry with no plans of ever bringing him back. She’d finished a bottle of ten year old scotch that night and fallen asleep in Henry’s bed after crying until she passed out. She does not do this in public. She doesn’t ever lose control.

Maybe because Robin is here it feels safe because she knows he won’t let anything happen to her.

Or perhaps it’s because Emma Swan became the Dark One two weeks ago, and her reason why - to protect Regina - is something so big and looming and incomprehensible that the only thing there is to do on day fourteen is drink until the guilt starts to fade. It doesn’t go away, nothing makes it stop; not Robin’s kind words, not Snow and David’s assurances that they don’t blame her for anything. Henry has even tried to get through to her, but still Regina loses focus when she can’t find that fucking sorcerer, not in any book, not a hint of him in Gold’s store. When things were Regina’s fault she could fix them, usually. She might not have always opted to, but she could. And now she can’t.

It’s only when Robin’s hand wraps around her wrist lightly that she realizes she’s been saying all of this out loud.

“Love,” he begins softly, something in his voice pained, but only to see her this way, to see her punishing herself by doing something to finally make her feel as badly as she thinks she should. “Would you have done it for her?”

“I already did,” she mutters. “There was a Chernabog, I let it…come at me instead of kill her.”

The alarm on his face is apparent for a brief moment, and he has no idea what a Chernabog might be, but he can assume it’s a terrible thing that Regina put herself in front of.

“I may not know all of the history between you two,” Robin begins. “But I know you. I’ve a feeling Emma does as well. If she made this sacrifice it wasn’t so that you could do this.”

Regina’s forehead knits together as she looks at Robin. “What does that mean?”

“She accepted the dark because she trusts that you’ll find a way to fix it. To pull that darkness out of her again.”

Rubbing a hand over her face, Regina closes her eyes, head in her hand as Robin’s begins to rub slow circles against her back.  “What if I can’t?”

“You can,” he speaks quietly. “And I’ll help you. Whatever you need. You’ll save her, Regina.” He’s been pushing the tequila bottle back gradually as they talk, enough so that Granny finally takes it and puts it back behind the counter. Regina doesn’t even notice, and she’s guided up, one of Robin’s arms wrapping tightly around her waist, the other helping her stand. “Let’s go home,” he murmurs against her ear, kissing her temple once he’s done speaking, and guiding her away from the diner.

“You think…I can save her?” she asks, leaning against him heavily.

“You will,” he replies instantly and with conviction, leading her to the mansion, securely holding onto her.

Tonight she is drunk and stumbling, defeated and tired.

Tomorrow, she’s going to save Emma Swan.

renegade

genre: fluff 

word count: 2,239    , i think ??

pairing: guess!!!!!! here i’ll give u a hint it’s phan

warnings: mentions of alcohol, some smoking, a few swear words, a lil bit of  badly written kissing woah call the police

A/N: oh my fucking god so i looked up what “renegade” meant bc i love the song and one of the meanings for it was “someone or something that causes trouble and cannot be controlled” and i was like wow that’d be a good title for this fic then and so yeah,,, the more u know and um sorry if there’s spelling or punctuation errors bc i literally did not proof read this at all

PS!!! if ur against gayness (if ur in this tag and u are then what are u doing here) then this is not a story for u, buddy.

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