idk what more to describe

New blog (well, restarted blog) and looking for people to follow

Mostly MtG blog, but I might do other stuff. Fanwalkers, writing bits, janky deck ideas, etc.

Idk what else to put I’m bad at describing myself.

Looking for more people to follow/more followers

@mirapunk @imperialseal @deelgathor @spiroandthelacktones @dimestoretajic @lord-alexander-locke want to help a girl out?*

*By reblogging this you’re agreeing to let me @ you in whatever content I feel you might want to see.

Thanks!

*kinda wishes Joker’s club looked more like this*

My OTP is dead, my beloved less evil butterfly is dead and it all happened in such a disappointing and instant way my eyes barely catched that moment leaving me all speechless and void
I had a really deep thought about @amazingphil

So, I was in the shower when Philip Michael Lester, the angel, triggered an Existential Crisis (sort of) for me. Holy crap.

Brace yourself, this is going to be hella long. 

Anyway, there’s a thought that been running around my head for a few days now. But I’ve been putting it off since I thought I finally got to the conclusion but then as I was taking a nice, warm shower my mind suddenly drifted to this certain thought and then I just fell off and got really deep about this topic. It’s about Phil if you still didn’t know. I got so deep that I literally fell off the bathroom floor, gasping “Oh my god or jfc (in full, btw. I’m so going to hell)” over and over again. 

Apologies in advance if I don’t make sense. It’s kinda hard to make others understand it other than you, especially since I can’t get my thoughts straight. Anway…..

My first thought originally was something that left me in awe and wonder. “How can Phil be so happy all the time?” I know it might sound like a Phan shipper but it’s not really (take it whichever, idc). I know that we all know that Dan has Phil and I came to the conclusion that Phil has Dan. And as long as Dan doesn’t leave Phil’s side and not be swept away by fame (which would never ever happen, btw) then Phil is content and happy. I mean, a lot of the talks are about how much Dan loves Phil, like ie #hearteyeshowell but we rarely see it the other way around. Well, at least not as much as the other. 

God, my heart hurts thinking about it. 

Hold on, there’s more. 

So, I’ve been watching Phil & Dan in New York. I hope it’s not my imagination, perhaps it is. Whatever. But I noticed that Phil wasn’t quite as cheery, idk why. Also, there was one thing that stuck out to me while I was reading The Amazing Book Is Not On Fire. It was the section about behind the cameras and all that. So, there was this part where Phil was saying that when he’s feeling sad, he just turns off the camera and comes back when he’s all happy and dandy. 

I came to realize that even though Phil is happy a lot and we mainly focus on Dan about the Existential Crisis. Phil gets one too, just like everyone, although not everyone has the same ones. We’re all different after all.  Phil is human, an adorable one at that, he has different emotions. Phil probably never lets anyone know when he feels down and sad and depressed.

Also, note, I am not an expert in things like Existential Crisis, I just get them so I don’t know anything too deep about this. I’m just sharing my deep thoughts, capiche?

Anyway, he never lets anyone know because he wants everyone to think he’s a happy person and that he’s strong and all that. (My heart is breaking.) He’s a  happy and positive person and doesn’t want to worry anyone or make them sad. He wants to brighten everyone’s day and not feel down, like the sun he is. He likes to make them laugh and not worry about him. Which is true cuz’ you rarely see a post about him being sad and all that. (I love this guy so much.) 

So once, there’s this gif of Phil about him saying “I’m useless in most way.” (getting off topic for a bit) Phil, darling. Don’t say that. You are a gift to the world, and I cannot tell you how wrong you are. You are an angel that the world doesn’t deserve to have. You’re not useless. I think if Dan gets EC, then the gif made me kind of realize that Phil has a different kind of EC, (tbh, idk what word to describe it. It kinda makes more sense if I use EC, sorry.) His kinds of, just revolves around himself (and not in a bad, arrogant way) and his insecurities and how he thinks he’s useless and probably not important, which is so wrong btw. 

A  very long metaphorical conclusion: 

So, if we call Phil the sun, what is Dan? Dan isn’t the moon, or the sky, or the stars (well he could be but not in this case). I realized that Dan is Phil’s cloud. What happens when the sun is gone during the day? It’s being covered by the cloud. Basically, Dan, the cloud covers Phil up when he’s in a really dark end. Also, when the sun is covered up, why is it dark? (Scientist would hate me. This is just metaphorical if you don’t know.) Shouldn’t the sun rays be shining out the sides when it’s covered up, or even be shining through since the (actual) cloud isn’t really that much? (Truly sorry if it doesn’t make sense, I just gotta get the thoughts out). But the sun doesn’t. It’s dark. It means that Dan, the cloud, is not hiding the sun and covering up his sunlight. Dan is pretending to be the one that’s dark while the sun, Phil, takes a moment to recover himself and be back to his usual cheery self before telling Dan that he’s okay before he moves away and let the sun shines again. 

When the cloud gets darker, Phil would shine brighter and brightened up the cloud, which is Dan. It’s vise-verse.  Dan would help Phil in any way he can, just like what Phil would do, so they could stand together in the light. Happy. This brings me to my first thought/point. 

The reason why Phil is holding strong is because Dan is there with him and the reason why Dan is there is because of Phil. If these two lovely angels separate, their world would be unbalanced, much more than ours would be affected because the two of them are each other’s lifelines. 

(God, I wish I had a friendship like that.) 

So yeahhhhh….. I know that a post like this would be somewhere out on the internet because the internet is big. I promise I didn’t copy. It just came to me. I hope you all agree with me and not think I’m crazy. I’m crazy as it is. 

I’M JUST SHARING MY THOUGHTS. 

@amazingphil @danisnotonfire