I’ve been reading a fair bit of romance lately I would like to propose a new trend: “romance without the consent issues and red flags of abusive behaviour”. (It might need a snappier title.)
But yeah, like instead of pushing past her boundaries “for her own good”, he steps back, gives her space, and shows her that she can trust him. Instead of him tracking her down after she says no, or stalking her place of work, she actually chooses to meet with him. Instead of him making her stay inside and being all super-alpha “protective” (aka controlling) because the vampires are after her or whatever, she learns how to fight vampires.
Because every time I read this “I love you so much I can’t control myself, I’m locking you up because I’m protective, I’m taking you away from your friends and family to protect you, I’m ignoring your agency and will for your own good” crap, all I can see is red flags. SO many red flags. And every time the guy flies into a jealous rage or manhandles her “for her own good”, I want to scream at the heroine not to marry him. Get away from him. Sooner or later, that rage is going to turn against you. I don’t care what he says right now. Words are easy.
Same goes for the heroines, albeit in a different way. She has no business reading his private letters or diary or digging into his past without his consent. She shouldn’t expect him to solve all her problems for her. And trying to make him jealous is manipulative.
Oh, and if he’s flirting with a pretty long-legged blonde woman, that does not make said woman a bitch or a slut. If he’s cheating on you, that’s 100% on him. He’s the one making that choice. Please stop with that “she’s so pretty and skinny, I immediately hate her” crap. Especially in a genre written predominantly by and for women. WTF.
While we’re at it, please, none of that “she wasn’t like the other women”. It’s way too close to “women are all terrible except for this one” for comfort and it makes me like the guy that bit less.
Overall, I would just like it so much better if there was actual respect between the characters. They’re both adults. They both get to make their own decisions. Her feelings are valid. His feelings are valid. He’s protective without being jealous or controlling. She can accept his help without giving up her independence. He gets to feel pain. She gets to be tough. He’s allowed to have female friends, she’s allowed to have male friends, because they actually trust each other.
You could still have a compelling love story, in any subgenre really, you can still have friends-to-lovers and rivals-to-lovers and love/hate drama and fake dating, and all the hot sex scenes you like. You could have, if anything, more compelling characters because she would have more agency and he would have actual respect for women as opposed to the “I respect you, but I’m still going to manhandle you and lock you up if needs be” variant I’ve read too often.
I like romance in theory. I’d like it a lot more without that nonsense I keep running into about women being the weaker sex and needing protection, while the guys are tough and feel no pain and call the shots. (Even when she’s “feisty”, she’ll still end up agreeing, in the end, that it’s better if he takes care of things. I hate that.)
I would just really like a kind of romance where it’s like the romantic sub-plots in other things I read. Mutual respect. Partnership. Trust. No toxic masculinity or casual misogyny. Two people who treat each other as people. That would be lovely.
Gf's housemate from hell didn't know she was messing with the devil.
Gather around, it’s going to be a long post. It’s also getting things off my chest finally.
Okay, so this story sets in India. My gf at that time was in University and living in a house with around 6 other housemates. She was fine with all of them except 1. We’ll call her FB. Fb was the type of housemate that made sure that my gf’s life there was miserable. She’d do something almost every day to upset my gf. Sometimes it’d be little things like stealing her food, borrowing her shit without permission and not returning it etc. Other times, she purposely chipped off parts from her coffee mug that I got her as a gift, slashed her bike tyres, wouldn’t let her and other housemates in at 1am when they was returning from a party and left them stranded outside..etc. you get the picture.
The house they were living in was for ‘girls’ only. Guys were allowed but then asked to leave after 12am where sometimes 'random’ security checks happen. I say 'random’ because they hadn’t had a security check in the 1.5 years she had lived there. Fb’s boyfriend lived with her for a week with no consequences either. So it’s no surprise that when I came for a 2 week stay over to the house (from another country because we were long distance), the landlady got a tipoff on the first day and a security check happened where I got kicked out. With nowhere to go at 1am and a kind of remote region, my gf decided to sneak me back in to stay the night and leave in the morning for a hotel. When I climbed up the staircase to go upstairs to her room, she saw me. We locked ourselves in the room , but then there were cops after 30 mins that showed up because fb claimed that I “raped” her and “touched her”. Wtf. I didn’t even acknowledge her. So the cops interviewed us for an hour and her parents were called (they live in a different state) explaining what she had done and a big deal was made. She had also been told she would be denied a stay for the next semester (current semester ending in a month). I was let go due to the false accusation (everyone at home said it didnt happen) but still out in the streets at 4am, sitting on the bench, with the nothing to do but plot my revenge.
what things have kaisoo confirmed that you only thought of before? please list 5 or 10. with feelings.
this is a really good question but 5-10? anon do u even know 5-10 things like that …I’ll try
so yeah this is going to be really unnecessarily long. I hope you fucking like READING ABOUT KAISOO because you like kaisoo and not bc you hate them and think they’re not real but still have to check kaisoo blogs and what kaisoo is doing and care a lot about what shippers think. if ur one of those people coming to this post….don’t get bitter just get better :)
DISCLAIMER: kaisoo~shipping~words~writing~speculation~still kaisoo~more words~possibly inaccurate quotes~opinions~facts~opinions!!!!!!~really disorganized~too long~not under a read more
so anyways. well, firstly from all the predebut pics we got it seemed like they were really close predebut. I mean, we got more kaisoo predebut pics than most of the other members by themselves. wtf is up with that. but ifans never really got to hear more. and the shippers just like languished in misery while all the other fans said they weren’t close even after the pic of ksoo lying on top of ji with a do not distribute warning but that’s another story…
but yeah eventually in an interview pcy brought up how they became close fast also brought up the really unexpected fact that ji was scared of ksoo at first ??? and once they cleared up the misunderstanding they became close really fast?? the implications are so…a lot but I got another ask on this topic so I won’t get into that here.
also another thing along the same line was ji helping ksoo with dancing predebut and them practicing together and then they literally…they went there in 2nd box and ksoo was always watching him HE WAS ALWAYS WATCHING HIM….I Felt That To Be True And It Was So.
so in connection with that, just kaisoo in general being really close…I know we see things like that now and it’s kind of interesting how ppl who don’t like kaisoo have to be so deep in denial. but if you are an ifan and weren’t around until, let’s say, last year, the depth of it was even worse before that. first it was kaisoo was only a thing bc of arbitrage, then it was only a thing bc antg tmrw, then it was all fanservice, then s*kai* and su_do and every other ship was so much better apparently and kaisoo was sooo overrated. and ppl were clearly resentful kaisoo became really popular and had all the best most popular fics and best writers and artists. kind of like how exo became super popular w ifans extremely fast and other fandoms were bothered and had to insult exo and exo-ls for every damn thing. lol. both things still apply to the present.
but like…god forbid you thought kaisoo was closer or different than any other ship involving them in the universe. for like the longest time it was me and a few friends deeply discussing kaisoo in private chats, wondering what all their interactions meant. I mean, in my experience that I remember, ofc shippers got excited about moments and people clearly thought they were both really lovely and really suspicious, but I really don’t rmbr anyone explicitly saying hey they’re actually really close and their interactions are different than other ships, none of this can be interpreted as fanservice. you just couldn’t say that.
I feel like in general the kaisoo ifan community just??? idk. didn’t know and were hopeful but we really weren’t sure for the most part. I did see kaisoo analysis before cmb and people said I don’t think they do fanservice and they’re really close. they also got compared to yun_jae.
so to get to the damn point, cut to cmb era when some people who communicated w kfans and read korean kadi shipper blogs and the like actually brought over to tumblr about how kaisoo is actually considered to be the closest to each other in the group, if not the closest in general. all their interactions were regarded as genuine, bts. they didn’t do fanservice, ji spoke to him in banmal and that’s a big deal. kfans also know that it’s suspicious how popular they are and sm doesn’t promote them. basically all these things that I know a lot of ifans wondered about but didn’t know how to find out. to wrap this up, that basically lead to me and others writing analysis and things like that!
also sorry to jump around but in 2nd box, someone who speaks korean informed me that they didn’t just say “we became close fast” they said “we became really close really fast”. they emphasized that shit. I mean, disclaimer that I’m not korean and understand only basic k-pop korean, but my friend who was told me that the term “close” to describe relationships is used much more loosely there, like people in your work group of acquaintances are “close”. so they really did emphasize they meant more than that. or maybe they didn’t. idk these things. don’t take my word on it. correct me if I’m wrong even, that would be much appreciated.
okay…this isn’t smth I thought of personally, but it’s so wild and icb I’ve never seen anyone else point it out. maybe its because I made it up. idk. I don’t rmbr the url unfortunately, but back in 2013 there was a blog that put really cheesy embarrassing fake captions on kaisoo gifs and sometimes people believed them and they got really popular. um I don’t have these saved. if you want to look then ok. so during mama 2013 ksoo was injured during a perf and was a total champ about it while ji kept checking up on him and helped him off the stage and at the airport the next day. nice. that really did happen and people still don’t….ok enough about haters. anyways.
that gifmaker put subtitles on their album of the year speech, which ksoo was at the hospital for, where ji was saying stuff like how he’s too upset to accept the award bc ksoo got hurt. so embarrassing and cheesy right? people really believed that too….so cut to the same interview where pcy spilled the scalding T in like aug 2014. they were talking about getting album of the year at mama 2013 and ji literally….oh my god…said how he couldn’t feel fully happy bc ksoo got hurt. smth like that. he really……………he’s worse than the most extra fake subs I’m so gone icb he did that.
side note: people really fell for the fake subs but won’t acknowledge kaisoo stuff literally does all the time…maybe that says smth that for many people actions don’t speak louder than words? they need smth like HI IM KSOO JI HURT HIS LEG AND IT MADE ME FEEL HURT EMOTIONALLY IM HELPING HIM OUT WITH HIS CRUTCHES AND UP AND DOWN STAIRS AND I CARE ABOUT HIM THE MOST SO I’M HELPING THE MOST…idk just a thought maybe you don’t feel the same which is fine. what I just wrote is so ridiculous but I wouldn’t be surprised. I mean ppl still site a 2013 interview where ksoo and tao were like “no homo” to a ? everyone else answered thoughtfully about what they like in men as proof kaisoo isn’t real and ksoo is str8 as heck. on the same caliber as tao. yep.
also goddamn in the 2nd box when they pinky promised on not one but TWO (2) dates and talked about it like they plan these things all the time. ifans never get to hear about shit but someone out there knows this shit bc it happens. also when ksoo talked about playing billiards with the members and ji started talking about playing billiards w ksoo and ksoo’s like “don’t say anything more” ???????? they go out secretly. that’s all. why it gotta be a secret?? You Know Why.
also shout out 2 gabi @kyungsoosjigglynalgas for reminding me about the exo quiz thingy where they confirmed yet again that ksoo and ji stay in the dorms a lot, which is smth they’ve hinted at before but they kind of indirectly confirmed again. are they cuddling?? ignoring each other??? watching movies????? cooking?? Who Knows besides them (and saesangs maybe)
so um. that’s all I can think of for now. my other thought I’m waiting for them to confirm bc it has to be true is ksoo helping ji with singing. I won’t hold my breath but….soon.
gosh so I hope instead of briefly talking about 5-10 moments you enjoyed these 4 (??) intensely described moments. um. im tired.
Request 02: omg I love
the party crasher AU!! are you going to do a part 3? you should(: - anonymous
Request 03: Are you
planning on doing a part 3 to the party crasher one? Because you totally
should- loved part 2! – anonymous
Request 04: I would
love to read the third part of the partycrasher imagine! Maybe with the reunion
of the golden trio? Orthe backstory why they’re no friends anymore? Idk i just
loved it ane i need more!! It was so brillant! Thank you for writing this
stuff! You’re amazing - leagreenly
You sigh as you pick off the last toilet paper strip from a
still passed out body whose identity remains unknown to both you and Thomas. “I
really am sorry…”
Thomas laughs and stuffs the toilet paper into his almost
over-flowing garbage bag, “It’s alright, it’s alright. I’m actually quite
impressed with your skills, they seem vaguely familiar…”
You open your mouth to tell him the truth that it wasn’t
just “another boy” who accompanied you to party crash Thomas’ house last night
but you immediately shut your mouth. It’s not your place to bring up Newt to
Thomas, it might bring up some unwanted memories and you’re almost 100% sure
that if you tell Thomas it was Newt’s idea then he’ll go into a rage.
“Want to go out and get some pizza?” Thomas asks as soon as
he re-enters the room from disposing the garbage bag.
Suddenly, you’re quickly reminded of your lunch date with
Newt that he’d arranged last night after scrolling through your blog for the
fiftieth time, you know he’ll never let you live that down. “I would but I’m
going out with Ne-
You immediately stop yourself with widened eyes and then you
double over into a fake coughing fit as Thomas stares down worriedly at you
asking if you’re okay.
“I’m –I’m fine.” You take in a breath and pretend to clear
your throat, “I think I just choked on my own saliva.” You put out slight chuckle to lighten the mood, “Anyway, I’m going out
with Nathan again, that boy I told you about.”
Thomas flashes a smile but the mood in his eyes don’t match
his grin and you feel guilty for turning down his invitation so you say,
He nods, “Have nice afternoon out.”
You leave Thomas’s house feeling a little unsure but decide
to just ignore it as curiosity gets the better of you because of this meeting
up with Newt. You know it’s just supposed to be a casual lunch date, with him
embarrassing you further because of your blog but you think you’ll use it to
find more out of the Golden Trio. You have a feeling that there is more to it
then just the separation because of different high schools…
“I really like how you portrayed me to be some sexy,
mysterious man in this one,” he says while shoving his mobile screen into your
face, “I never knew you thought of me like that.”
“Shut up.” You groan and spin your fork around your pasta to
gather up a good mouthful. Although the pasta is delicious, you made a grave
mistake. It’s the messiest food to eat and you don’t want to look like a savage
in front of Newt.
“So how was cleaning up Thomas’s house?” He asks before
taking a bite into his sandwich.
You sigh, “It was the
most fun I’ve ever had!” Sarcasm drips off your voice and Newt can’t help but
smile. “Well, it was alright, but I’ve definitely had enough of Vaseline for a
very long time. Also, he doesn’t remember anything except…”
Newt’s eyes flash worriedly, “Except what?”
You groan disgustedly, “Except his little intimate time with
Newt laughs as you make an even more disgusted face, luckily
you got out from underneath the bed before you experienced some of the real “business” they did.
“Hey, I know, maybe you should come with me to Thomas’s tonight.”
Newt frowns, “I don’t think so. I haven’t seen him since…” A long pause takes place and it only makes you even more curious. And it answers your thought about being more to the story than he let on.
“About the Golden Trio, what even happened?” You try
bravely, hoping he’ll give you a clear answer.
“I told you, we had to go to different high schools.” He
says simply while staring down at his plate of food. You see his fists clench slightly and looking back at it now, you should have taken that as a sign to not press further…
“C’mon Newt,” You say gently, “I saw how worried you were
when he saw you. What really happened?”
“I…” He shakes his head, “Do you want to see something cool
“I know this really nice park with gorgeous trees, and it’s
autumn so the leaves will look fantastic with their yellow, orange and red…”
You see tears well up in the corners of his eyes but he
continues to babble on about this supposedly beautiful park. When his hands
start to match his shaking voice you order some containers to take your food
home in and immediately leave the café with a terrified Newt in your arms. He
still continues about the park as you try to find a taxi since taking his
motorcycle is definitely a no-go. But you can’t spot any taxis anywhere and you
don’t even have the money for it so instead you call Thomas.
“Look, I’m really sorry but could you pick us up? We’re at
Monty’s Café. Something is happening to Newt and I can’t get him to settle down
and I know you don’t like him and I know something happened in the past with
the two of you and I’m not sure if seeing you will make him worse but we need
to get him to my house, please.”
“Wait, what? What happened to this Nathan guy? You’re with Newton?” Thomas’s questions pour out uncontrollably.
“Thomas, we need you right now. Please, I’ll explain later.” Your voice becomes choked with tears.
After a few minutes
you hear a soft reply, “Alright.”
As Newt’s rambles worsen you grab the edges of his gentle
face and you stare into his brown eyes, with a pleading voice you try
desperately to pull him out of this weird in between conscious and sub-conscious he’s put himself into, “Newt. Listen to me, I don’t know what’s
happening to you but I’m taking you home; got it?”
All the while you talk, his eyes don’t even fall onto yours.
After settling Newt down onto the couch, thankful that none
of your family members are home, you start making a cup of tea but after thinking through all the possible outcomes of Newt’d outburst makes your hands
shake excessively and you spill the milk everywhere. You break down into tears
as Thomas mops it up.
“It’s my fault.” You groan into your hands as they are wet with
your salty tears of guilt and sadness. “If I didn’t ask him about you…”
“I knew you two had history, the Golden Trio? With some
other guy called Mo- no -Minho?”
Thomas sighs and places the mop back into the bucket and
takes a seat next to you, “Yes. Newt, Minho and me. The Golden Trio.”
“I don’t understand.”
“You don’t want to understand.”
You look over at Thomas and grab his wrist pleadingly, “Yes,
I do Thomas. My friend is stuck in his own rambling mind because of me and I
don’t even know why.”
Thomas leans back into the kitchen chair and mumbles, “Where
do I even begin?”
“At the beginning,” you say softly, urging him on.
He sighs and after a few minutes of thinking-silence he begins, “We were friends since primary school but the name, Golden
Trio, didn’t fall into place until the start of middle school. We were called
that because we were inseparable, and we always did “cool kid stuff” like
climbing roofs, swinging on ropes over lakes, things like that.” Thomas sighs
and you catch him glance over at Newt whose seemed to quiet down. “We did all
those things because they were just harmless dares, you know? Stupid kid stuff.
“Until we did something seriously stupid.”
The Golden Trio, they called
them, climbed up the grassy hill. Thomas pointed out the old, worn silo at the top of
the hill and exclaimed, “I bet that I could stay the night inside there longer
than any of you!”
jumped in, “No way! I could easily beat you two, like that!” He said, showing a
click of his fingers.
“I don’t know…” Newt
said, unsure of his fate within the howling silo. He stared up at it, you could
almost see the shivers run down his back. “Why don’t we just go play at our
tree house instead?”
“This is our last
night together, Newt! Remember? We’re moving to different sides of town,
different high schools. We have to go out with a bang!” Thomas explained.
“I still don’t know…”
“Don’t be such a wuss!
Scaredy cat!” Minho teased.
“It was true, we thought of Newt as nothing other than a
scared little boy so we thought that a night in the silo would make more of a
man out of him. We…” Thomas pauses as though he despises going on to tell the
story. You start to get worried for Newt, what did they do?
“Once we climbed up the ladder inside the silo we stayed on
the first floor because the second-floor-ladder had disappeared. Anyway, Minho and
me, we… we left Newt there by himself. When he was almost asleep we ran out of
there and knocked the ladder down and told him we’d see him in the morning.”
“We didn’t know, I swear we didn’t know that there was going
to be a storm. The thunder must have been so loud in the silo… the flashes of
lightning… and the howling wind, it bucketed down with rain and by morning we found him curled up
muttering incoherent sentences. Sick with a fever. He screamed at us when he saw us
and started to cry… I wasn’t thinking, we weren’t thinking at all. I was just an inconsiderate little brat.”
You stand up from the kitchen table and back away from
Thomas, “I can’t believe you did something like that to a child!”
“I was a child too! We were just kids! I didn’t know… I
didn’t know, I swear it!”
“Thomas…” You shake your head, “We’ll talk later, but right now? I think you should leave. I
need to make sure Newt’s okay, please go out through the back.”
Thomas open his mouth but doesn’t say anything, instead he
does what he’s told and you quickly tend to Newt. You enter the room and Newt
looks around at the house and at you mildly confused, “Did I pass out or
something? What happened to having lunch at the café?”
You hand him his sandwich and he looks at it, something
flashes across his eyes and his cheeks go red, not with embarrassment but
with disappointment; ashamed. “I’m sorry… I –did I freak out?”
“You just talked.”
He shakes his head, “I wanted to tell you but… I can never
get it out without-
“It’s okay.” You pull Newt into your arms and he hugs you
back, weakly, “Thomas told me what happened. I am so sorry Newt, I didn’t know
Thomas would ever do something like that.”
Newt whimpers in reply so you just hug him
tighter. “It’s okay, you’re alright.” You coo softly and he returns the
gesture. “Do you want to go home?”
As you walk up the driveway of your house, you feel
strangely accomplished. You’re glad that you know a bit more about the Trio but
you’re also ashamed of Thomas’s actions. You can’t get the picture of Newt’s terrified expression out of your mind… you offered to stay the night at his house but he practically pushed you out the door. You walk inside your house and see the
living room light on and hear Thomas’s floaty laughter and another voice you
don’t recognize. Just because he’s your neighbor doesn’t mean he can just
intrude in your home!
You smell Chinese takeout as you enter the living room,
Thomas and his guest turn to look at you.
“Y/N! Um, is Newt okay?”
“He’s fine, he’s at home.” You growl, clenching your fists. Why
is he acting like everything is okay between the two of you? You just found out
that he traumatized some poor kid for life. Why is he so carefree
when poor Newt had to go through the night at the silo all over again? “What
the hell is going on here?”
“This is Minho,” Thomas pulls your attention towards the
stranger and your eyes widen, it’s the final member of the Trio.
Minho smiles sweetly, although you’d rather sock him in the
head before friendly greetings. He stretches out his hand, “Nice to meet you,
Alright, so maybe you were supposedly joking when you
thought about punching him in the face, but for some reason, your hand just
does it. Your hand is like one of those people in a group conversation when someone from the group makes a joke that they don’t understand and instead take it quite literally.
While your hand flails out from your side, you
start to wonder if you’ve just entered a weird dream. Maybe you fell asleep at
Newt’s house while putting him to bed. But instead you smack him right in the
cheek, skin on skin, at first you feel quite satisfied with yourself and then you slowly start to feel
astonished. Not guilty, just astonished.
“Nice to meet you too.”
A/N: Thank you so much for the lovely feed back on this imagine series! I can’t believe so many of you enjoyed it, thank you for all your messages, likes and reblogs :) I hope you enjoyed this one too, it was a little less humorous to read, which I’m very sorry for, but the back-story had to be done sooner or later. And sorry for any confusing grammar/spelling mistakes!
uh idk if you ship it, but if so anything nurseydex? if not, zimbits au where they meet because bitty is teaching jack how to cook/bake (it can be in any context). ok thank you!
jack knows, objectively, that the class ins’t a contest. it’s a cooking class. there’s not a single fucking part of it that’s a contest. it’s literally set up so that people can sign up online, pay a couple hundred bucks, and then spend every wednesday night in july and august learning how to make different kinds of dishes thanks to some cute southern guy with freckles and nice arms. it’s supposed to be to better one’s self. it’s not about–
it’s not about winning, jesus.
jack knows this, objectively, but shitty made the mistake of calling jack a fucking loser to his face, and so now jack means business.