idk if it's working tbqh but i wanted to try something new

Not Funny! {CHRIS EVANS SMUT}

Chris Evans x Reader

Request by Anon: “Chris. Evans. smut.” The reader has been in a relationship with Chris for years first friends now his better half and she has to do a sex seen with Bucky Barnes since shes his love interest. Chris freaks out but the reader calms him down. They just aren’t as slick and quite as they think.

A/n: Sorry this got out so late and that it sucks cuz i rushed. It took me hours to write it but I loved writing this though!

Im thinking about doing promps but idk if that what you all want so let me know! Also please request just no ships rn. Thank you and enjoy.- Maybie xx

Genre: Romance, Smut

Rated: Mature

Warning: Swearing, Anxiety, Sex.

Author: Mavelthegotodrug

Originally posted by mostlybenedict

Originally posted by quicksilvxrs


Mrs. Evans.

Has a nice ring to it. You always get so happy when someone calls your that. Being Mrs. Evans was amazing but tbqh its a hella of a lot of work. You were apart of The Avengers cast as well and played Bucky Barnes love interest. And you where in some movies with Chris before he become captain so you knew him pretty well. You knew what made him angry or really happy, what made him laugh or cry, and what made him anxious.

It’s a pretty well known fact that he had anxiety. It’s just not well know for what gives him anxiety attacks. One of the many reasons is you, which always broke your heart. If you have to do a sex scene, or a fighting scene. He would always beg you not to do them, but he knew you’d do them anyway. You would always try and make him happy and safe but this was your career.

Acting, singing, modeling. You’re trifecta. Since you were only 28 you still did everything you loved doing. Your were young and daring and were always up for new things. Chris thought that was the best and worst quality about you. Don’t get me wrong it’s fun when your up to go hiking with him, Pratt, and Anna but not so fun to watch you fuck another man.

He knew that at the end of the day it’s up to you. He knew you saw all his movies and all his sex scenes but he’s never seen you in one and wasn’t planing on it until the added in scene of you and Bucky Barnes ‘reconnecting’. Chris thought the scene was unnecessary but you, on the other hand, thought it was a nice touch to the romance and protectiveness behind your character and Sebastian’s.

“Don’t touch me!” He hissed. The words stung and left a bitter musk in the air. You knew he need you but that didn’t mean you were gonna force something he didn’t want. You nodded and put your hands in the air stepping back a little bit showing you were doing what he said.

“Baby, stop acting like this” you pleaded. It was an hour long lunch brake and after it was two fight scenes and the sex scene.

“Like what Y/N?! Upset?! Angry?! Fucking pissed off?!” He yelled throwing his hands up in the air. You jerked back a little bit and his face dropped as well as his hands. You knew he would never hurt you but with boyfriends in the past you could never be to careful.

“No Chris. Anxious. Please sit and breath. At lest let me touch you” you spoke softly. you watched as his chest when up and down quickly. His breaths turning into huffs, His eyes begging to water. You reached out your hand and gently touched his arm making sure he knew you weren’t going to leave his side when hes like this.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to scare you i jus-” you cut him off as you pulled him to you.

“I’m not scared of you, Chris. You’re to good of a man to hurt me” you said starring into his deep blue eyes. That’s the only thing you loved about his eyes when he was sad. If he cried or got flustered his eyes would go a deep blue. It was somewhat calming for you which in the end only helped him calm down.

His head dropped as his hands covered his face. You heard his groans and soft sigh be muffled by his big hands. You brought up your small hands and held on to his. You moved your hands so his came off his face. his eyes were big red and puffy. You watched as his eyes slowly opened and he stared at you. Your hands squeezed his as you moved his strong arms to hug your body. You snaked your arms under his and around his torso, your head rested on his chest as you held him tight. His head rested on yours and you smiled.

“its okay Darling, if its that bad for you to watch i wont do it” you widespread

You watched as his hands moved to his face and he sighed slightly while rubbing his eyes. He looked right at you, grabbed your face, and kissing your forehead.

“Baby, i just want you to remember that your mine” he spoke in a low deep sexy voice while smacking your ass and squeezing it. “That ass is mine.” he said letting go as his hands crawled up your sides up to your breasts. squeezing them gently. “These are mine.” he let go and cupped your face. kissing your neck, jaw, behind your ear, nose, then your lips. “Those are only for me to kiss.” he widespread. his electric blue eyes were filled with lust and you smirked.

“But Seb’s gonna kiss those place too..” you said. you lifted your hand and pocked his nose. he scrunched his face up like a little bunny.

“Well, we both know he can’t fuck you like i do” he spoke a little louder this time, which turned you on the slightest bit. his strong huge arms intertwined together as the crossed over his tight shit that hugged his amazing torso. your eyes flickered up and down talking your boyfriends entire body in mind, his sexy face, and toned body, his height, the way his hands and fingers could make you feel. You shot your eyes back to his and saw his evil little smirk. You smiled and grabbed a bunch of his shirt and started to walk backward slowly to the bedroom. You just watched him as his long arms opened the small door to his trailer bedroom your legs hit the bed and you fell with Chris on top of you and chuckled as you let our a small gasp.

“Wanna show me you can fuck me better?..” you said gently kissing his lips. His rough hands were always so careful and loving against your skin. His hands went under your top and slipped over your head. He flung it across the trailer, he smirked at you as he pushed you further up the bad your legs wrapped around his body he pushed him self on to his knees using my legs to prop himself up. Your hands reached to unbuckle his belt and slip off his jeans and boxers, Chris slightly hit your hand out of the way.

“Its all about you baby girl, you don’t have to do a single thing but lay there and let me make love to you.” he slid with a straight face as his pants and boxers came off along with his shirt. You giggled and traced your finger along his abs then his v-line.

“I can deal with that.. i guess” you laughed. Chris gave the stink eye which soon turned to lust as he examined your figure

“Your fucking gorgeous y/n how did i get so lucky? like damn’ Chris’ hands began wandering down your body, slightly squeezing in some areas. His hands found the top of your jeans and pulled the clothing off, throwing it on the floor carelessly. you arched by back at the feeling of his long fingers ghosting over the fabric of your red lace underwear. you watched as Chris began to smirk his eyes never leaving yours. his slender fingers hocked onto your panties as he pulled them down the soft lace left goosebumps and you shivered. You closed your eyes wincing from the lost connection. His strong hands rested on your hips and his fingers snaked around your waist digging in a little bit. You knew he loves leaving marks on your neck, breasts, hips, and inner thighs but he also knew he cant leave any since you are doing that scene with Seb. You eyes began to flutter open but closed so fast, you let yourself scream out his name as he unexpectedly slammed himself into you.

“Oh my god Chris holy fuck” you gasped as he pounded into you. He moaned in response which sent a sharp tingle down your spine. Right as you felt yourself come undone Chris let go to. Leaving you both a moaning loud mess.

“Wrap it up Y/N, your on in 5!” you heard Downey clear his throat and yell from outside your trailer. Your eyes went big as you covered your mouth staring right at the hysterically laughing Chris. Rolling your eyes you got dressed.

You step out of your trailer and saw everyone sitting in their chairs dying laughing. Mostly Downey who was crying from laughing so hard. 

“Shut up its not funny at lest i get some!”

taxonomist  asked:

hi! sorry if this is weird, but I'm visiting Edinburgh and Glasgow this week, and was wondering if you had any Hot Tips for things to see!

omg omg yes i totally dooooooo, literally all i want in life is to work in the ~scottish heritage industry~ so like this is what i think about most of the time tbh

EDINBURGH

  • okay so literally everyone says the castle so i’m gonna get that out of the way first, if you like castles go to the castle? if you wanna see the scottish crown jewels go to the castle? it’s there! it’s a castle!
  • the camera obscura, if you’re a person like me who feels a sense of childlike amazement at optical illusions and magic tricks. i. fucking. love. magic. tricks. so this is a strong recommendation on my part here.
  • the palace is actually really cool and underrated! everyone goes to the castle but holyroodhouse is really pretty and has a ruined abbey in the grounds and a very cool gallery attached to it and is just generally neat. plus you get to see our ugly lil ikea parliament just across the road!
  • the national museum just opened its new galleries which i haven’t even been to yet! and they look awesome!! also the celts exhibition that’s on right now is awesome and super super worth seeing
  • if you like impressionism, the national gallery is doing an EXCELLENT exhibition at the moment on daubigny, monet and van gogh, which i HIGHLY recommend, 10/10
  • the national portrait gallery is fabulous and is taking part in the fake! challenge, so there is (at least) one painting in there right now that’s actually a fake, i still haven’t found it but watch this space
  • mary’s milk bar, fabulous gelato place on the grassmarket, try the violet and chocolate-chip if they have it 
  • eteaket, totally fab teashop in the new town, if you love yourself get the cake
  • if you like exercise and walking and nice views, arthur’s seat is a not-too-bad climb (there’s a pathway around the back that makes it a LOT easier) but the crags in general are really lovely (on a nice, non-raining day!)
  • THE CAT CAFE
  • all of stockbridge to be honest (fab little area by the river, many excellent charity shops, go across george street and down the hill until you hit river) but especially maxi’s and hector’s 
  • (idk if you plan on going out while you’re here but if you like alcohol of many kinds, i HIGHLY recommend #1 dragonfly, just off the grassmarket, fancy cocktails of MANY MANY KINDS, i recommend the speyside invaders #2 hoot the redeemer, has an ice-cream vending machine, #3 the devil’s advocate, gorgeous gorgeous gorgeous, and #4 copper blossom on george street, expensive but INCREDIBLY gorgeous and delicious. ignore all of this if you are not a terrible “omg cocktails!” person like me because i can literally just list cocktail bars for like an hour)

GLASGOW

  • KELVINGROVE!!!!! kelvingrove kelvingrove kelvingrove. fabulous museum that prompted my lifelong museum dedication, regular free organ recitals in the great hall
  • provand’s lordship, oldest house in glasgow (only 1471 lmao we’re such a new town) right next to our weird lil cathedral! (it’s NOT ACTUALLY A CATHEDRAL okay they call it a cathedral but it’s NOT A CATHEDRAL because they’re PRESBYTERIANS and HAVE NO BISHOPS so there is NO CATHEDRA so it’s NOT A CATHEDRAL /bitter episcopalian)
  • THE HOUSE FOR AN ART LOVER, omg it’s my favourite it’s so beautiful. basically, the entire city of glasgow has an enormous ongoing crush on charles rennie mackintosh who designed basically everything nice in our city, and the house for an art lover is basically the inside of his brain, it’s fabulous, totally worth a visit
  • you can ALSO get a glimpse into his brain by visiting the willow tearooms on buchanan street! very cute
  • if you enjoy staring at diamonds, one of my favourite pastimes, the argyll arcade is a beaut
  • the hunterian museum! part of glasgow university which is literally so beautiful and full of fabulous antonine wall finds. plus a visit there involves wandering around the uni a bit which is so worth the time
  • the people’s palace!!!! the winter gardens!!!!
  • THE BURRELL COLLECTION, omg i love the burrell collection so much. real talk one of my top 5 dream places to work ever
  • basically all the shops in the west end tbqh (yes, my dear fellow weegies, i am indeed a West End Wanker, i know people who have been quoted on Overheard In The West End, i am That Person) but especially (in no particular order): 
  • thistle books! fabulous second-hand bookshop with an inexplicably large sheet-music section, pain in the ass to find but worth it and RIGHT NEXT DOOR TO:
  • voltaire & rousseau, my favourite bookshop of all time!! ALSO a pain in the ass to find but it’s basically a giant shed full of books in literally no order whatsoever run by a dude who does not give a fuck about anything. RIGHT NEXT DOOR TO:
  • tchai ovna! gorgeous tea-house, usually full of art students but they’re relatively harmless 
  • hillhead book club! confusingly, this is actually a bar in an old cinema. nonetheless, super cute!
  • ashton lane! really cute street full of cafes and bars and things, and also home to the grosvenor cinema if you want to catch a movie one night
  • if you like consuming alcohol in extremely fancy surroundings, would strongly recommend the Anchor Line near george square
  • (iiiiif you have time, as in like a day, to spend  on something, which is obv a long shot, i would HIGHLY HIGHLY RECOMMEND new lanark, which is a world heritage site in the middle of some fabulous scottish countryside - you can get the train there from glasgow and it takes about an hour so obv this is only if you have a while to spare but it’s really very cool. if you like learning about industrial mill-towns and the scottish enlightenment. which, as i type this, i am realising may be a more niche interest than i had assumed.)

i’m stopping now because i always go completely overboard on stuff like this and it’s ridiculous but hopefully something on there will be fun!! also my internet is being a TOTAL BASTARD and not letting me add any more links but i will come back and add them later