idk guys this is really pointless

anonymous asked:

Uncle Mod, I really need some advice at the moment. I understand if you'd rather not answer this for any reasons, and that you're dealing with lots of stuff of your own at the moment, so it's okay if you don't respond, but... How do you find hope when things are hopeless? When things are hollow and pointless, and more than anything you just want to give up, give in, just... stop. I'm.. really having trouble finding reasons to keep hoping at the moment. Thank you, sorry, I hope your day goes well

sorry it took a while to get around to replying, but this is like, a big question? and I have trouble answering it for myself, but, I guess one thing is to find rocks to hold onto- those can be people, places, cartoons, comics, that one song you really like played 50 times back to back. Find something solid that you know and can hang on to and appreciate inside and out. Getting your sense of hope back is hard, but if you find these solid joyous things then you can work to back that sense that there are things worth fighting for- if to do so you have to cling to it and smush your face all up against it, that’s cool. It doesn’t matter how silly, obscure, weird or completely unrelated to the chaos of the world it is; if it matters, that’s power. Allow yourself to find the atoms of joy in the things you know to be good and give yourself time to think about and explore them, because spending time looking through something leads to better understanding and perspective. This doesn’t mean you’re removing yourself from the big picture, it means you recalibrating what that means. Heck the last time I was like this I went on a mass vine-watching spree, and it worked, because honestly I think joy is the best bringer of hope I know. Anyway, love you anon I think we’re all kind of in this situation together right now, but good luck and maybe we can all get through this one hand-hold at a time.

okay but I also have another story

So I always go to the same liquor store, mainly because it’s a block away so #convenience, ya know? It’s super tiny so I’ve only ever really seen the same two or three guys work there. And so now, even though I don’t go all that often, they all apparently know me. Which is nice because at this point they don’t ask me for my ID anymore, but it has also made the last few times when I went to pay…interesting.

Time 1: I go to pay and the guy says “oh! We haven’t seen you here in awhile!!!” Which makes me wonder what it says about me that the only place where people know me is the liquor store, but whatever. 

Time 2: I go and I was just a mess, I didn’t put my contacts in and didn’t dry my hair. I didn’t think much of it, but then the guy asked for my ID. That I thought was a little strange, since they haven’t asked me for it in ages, but whatever, maybe they’re being stricter now. But then he looks at it and goes “OH! I know you!!!” Which THEN makes me think maybe when I slum it in the looks department I slum it a bit too hard.

Time 3 aka today: I go to pay and the guy again comments that he hasn’t seen me in awhile. (Okay I went like two ago it hasn’t been THAT long but okay dude.) And then he asks me how everything is going and says “you have a baby, right?” At which point I literally go “NOOOOOOPE DEFINITELY NOT THANK GOD THIS BOOZE IS JUST FOR ME TYVM.”  

idk I feel like this post had more of a point when I was composing it in my head but basically it just makes me feel a certain kind of way that the only place where I have established myself as a “regular” is at a liquor store and the main comment I receive is how surprising it is that I haven’t been there more often. 

ritsu-kageyamas  asked:

1, 8, and 18 for ritsu?

Absolutely!

1: What is a scene that really got to you?

This is a tricksy one… I think one that got me, solely cause it was so sudden, was when Mob found his house on fire. Just seeing him instantly snap into this inferno of unbridled rage at seeing his (fake) dead parents, then going on some relentless hunt, beating the shit out of the guys who he assumed had set the fire. Didn’t think the kid had it in him, I was pretty spooked. 

8: Favorite and least favorite arc?

Favorite is Mogami arc. As brutal as it was, it was really…intriguing? I guess that’s the word for it??
Least favorite arc was probably the one with all the urban myths, if that can be called an arc (was it? I can’t remember..) Idk, in a way it felt a bit pointless, also that pervy guy gave me the CREEPS! I still love the old running grandma tho lmao

18: What headcanons do you have for Ritsu?

Shit there’s so many. Uhhhh…these are the ones I can remember, some I made and some I found/agree with:
   -He is 106% gay for Shou Suzuki

   -He disassociates a lot. Probs just lies in a different plane of existence for like half the day.

   -This kid chugs bags of suckers and drinks endless amounts of coffee 

   -Hates Teru for crushing on Mob but also wants Teru to hurry the fuck up and ask him out already so Mob isn’t left hanging

  -He likes to pick up bugs and play with them, if only to make Reigen extremely uncomfortable or grossed out 

   -Loves making self-depreciating/depressing jokes to hide the fact that he’s perpetually screaming on the inside

   -Takes long walks, sometimes through the city, sometimes in the park or by the river, just sits silently and reflects about life until he goes home at sundown

   -He has extremely vivid nightmares and gets sleep paralysis often. He’s not affected by them that much, but he does like to look up weird dream analyses and write them down if they’re interesting/gruesome enough. 

   -Secretly loves bunnies (he isn’t gonna let anyone know something as ridiculous as that)

this week is really good my guys. i ate super healthy, got off of birth control (it was adding to my depression), cut all my hair, and my brother @clarkesquad is coming to gay it up with me in two days.

what a fantastic week off 10/10