idk but this scene was hot

Im probably the only one who does this
  • Lemony goodness fanfics: -Insert hot as hell make out scene-
  • Me: oh... my
  • Fanfic: -insert dirty talk here-
  • Me: ...why can i hear them-
  • Fanfic: -Dude fucking moans-
  • Me: Forgive me mother for i have sinned.
of grocery happenings and broken glass - sans x reader/self insert

HEY! Since it’s fanfic friday, can you do one with UT Sans and the “enemies to lovers” trope? it can just be a few scenes where the relationship changes. u dont have to ofc but idk i really like those kinds of stories :‘0c

Summary: You’re an enigma wrapped in a mystery, and he’ll do anything literally) to get you to solve yourself. (Or the obligatory fic wherein sans goes from wanting to dunk you to wanting to kiss you)

Notes: AAAAAAAA?????? AAAAAA. Mcfrickin. Love this trope. Bless u. blessed prompt. i had too much fun writing this help.

Writer: Mod Chrissu

The first time he meets you, it’s weird as hell to him.

Firstly, you are probably the best looking human he’s ever laid eyes on. Your hands are balled up and pushing into your hips, your head craned to look up with a sneer at somebody much taller than you.

When he sees who it is, the attraction that he felt immediately was replaced with intense anger.

His brother is holding a grocery basket, one that he knows isn’t his because it’s completely barren of any type of pasta or sauce. His grin is a little shaky, as if he’s apologetic, but also scared. There’s a few food items on the floor that are lying abandoned, so he assumes that the basket must have overturned in some way and Papyrus went to help you. So why did your expression hold so much fury?

He mosies on over, hands stuffed in his pockets. He’s gonna start out calm and cordial, and hopefully this human won’t give him a reason to dunk them into next Saturday. “hiya. what’s up?” He greets, keeping his tone relaxed and chipper, hoping that this goes well.

“SANS!” The way his brother says his name, almost in relief, makes his opinion of the human drop even further. “HELLO, BROTHER!”

You turn to face Sans, your face portraying annoyance. If it wasn’t for the fact that you looked like you had a problem with his bro, Sans might have considered using a sly pickup line. But no, you open your mouth and erase that possibility. “Oh, he’s with you?” You imply, pointing to the taller skeleton, who’s fidgeting nervously.

His grin turns a little steely. He doesn’t like to see Paps so scared. “yeah. s’there a problem with that?”

“Maybe. Anyways, listen here, dudebro.” Attention aimed at Papyrus again, mouth twisting into a scowl. “I got this. I don’t need somebody swooping in and saving me.” You rip the basket away from Papyrus and bend down to pick up the food on the floor, eyes widening when you see the damage done. “Damn it, the cans are dented!”

“listen buddy, i’m sure you’re just misunderstanding–” His patience is wearing very thin but an agitated sigh cuts him off.

“Look, buddy, I already had to walk all the way here because my piece of shit car broke down, I don’t need some random guy telling me off.” Your body language radiates don’t fuck with me today, and he doesn’t really understand why. “I’m sorry, but I’m not in the mood.” Food retrieved from the ground and in the basket, you straighten up and give both he and Papyrus a pointed glare. “Now if you’ll excuse me, which I don’t really care if you do or don’t, I have to replace these cans.”

Without letting him speak, you turn on a heel and stomp out of the aisle, leaving him in dumbfounded silence. What the hell was your problem?

The next time he sees you, it’s without you knowing.

It’s been a few days since what happened in the grocery store, and frankly he’d be fine with never seeing your face again. Somebody so filled with negativity and hatred for others for no reason…He doesn’t like people like that. He’s glad he’ll never see you again.

(Except he does.)

He hears a scream before he sees the blur of a person being tossed out onto the sidewalk a few houses down from where he’s standing. He almost runs over to help until another human shows up. They step out onto the steps angrily, if their rigid posture and antagonistic stance is any factor.

“Get the fuck out, you waste of space. Don’t even know why I bothered with you. You’re nothing but shit.” They spit out.

“Nonono, no please, I’ll be better, don’t do this please–” The voice is so full of fear and regret, and it’s so familiar. He knows that voice. It stirs a forgotten anger in his chest, and finally he registers that it’s you, the human from the grocery store.

Your clothes are ripped in places, there’s bruises all over your arms, the shirt you have on is riding up and showing off even more bruises on your back and sides. Your knees are scuffed from your fall, and you’re barely keeping your torso up off the ground. Your form is shaking, soft sobs emitting from your mouth. What a moment to be observing you. To avoid being seen, he ducks behind a nearby trashcan.

“You were lucky, you had me to love you! I’m probably the only person on this Earth left that actually gives a fuck about you! None of your friends or your family actually care, they’re faking it!” The human on the steps barks, and he notices a glint from their hand. They throw it in your direction, and the bottle shatters on the ground a few feet away from you, pieces scattering all over the pavement. “Get the hell out of here, you damn slut!”

The human on the steps goes back into the house and throws out a bag of clothes before slamming the door. Sans turns away from the scene, expression a mixture of shock and confusion. He has no idea what to think. Obviously, the dude that just kicked you out is an asshat, but did you deserve it? He’s not the kind of guy to wish pain or suffering on anybody else, so no, he supposes you don’t. He goes to pick himself up off the ground.

Except you pass by. You notice him there. It’s silent for one scarily long moment.

“How much of that did you see?” You inquire roughly, voice cracked from crying. A pang of pity ripples through his SOUL.

“…all of it.”

Your face is unreadable, you just grip the bag you have a little harder. It’s plastic, so your fingers sink into the material like clay. “…Fuck off.”

He looks up at you in surprise. “what?”

“I said fuck off.” You hiss, your glare piercing. “Want to know why I got kicked out? One of the cans I brought home from the store, that your idiot brother made me drop? It was dented. So fuck you, fuck your brother, fuck everything.” You grit your teeth and march off, pulling the bag over your shoulder.

He scrambles up and after you, though a tiny inner voice questions his motives. What is he gonna do? You obviously don’t want to see him, your little proclamation proved so, so why is he chasing you? He squashes down the thought, unsure if he wants to know why.

“look, kid, i’m sorry.” He skids in front of them, chest heaving with the extra effort he put into catching up with them. “i don’t understand your attitude, or why you act the way you do, but acting that way isn’t going to change anything.”

“You know nothing about me, why the hell are you trying to do here?” You snap, dropping your bag. Despite being bloody and scratched and obviously injured, you still stand as if you’re super girl about to face off with her greatest enemy yet. 

“i have no idea. i don’t really know.” He almost whispers it, because he doesn’t really know what he’s doing, or why. “but i don’t want to be the reason you hate the world so much. at least let me help you find a place to stay for a bit.”

Your mouth twists, and a range of emotions flip through your face: confusion, anger, sorrow, and finally it stops on that flat mask you had on. “..Okay, fine.”

He breathes out a sigh of relief.

He finds you a hotel to stay in, and while he wouldn’t usually pay for a stranger’s stay, he does for you. Seeing the person you had to deal with, the way they treated you…Something told him that wasn’t the only time they treated you badly. That’s a scary situation to think about, so of course you would be bitter and angry. He pays for a week, hoping it’s enough time for you to figure out what you need to do or for you to get a job.

He escorts you to your room, and it’s quiet but it isn’t uncomfortable. You’ve been through a lot, he guesses, so talking about it right now would be a little much. Instead, as you both reach your room, he asks to come in for a moment.

Puzzled, you agree, and let him in. It’s a small room, with a dresser pushed against the wall adjacent to the doorway, a lamp in the corner, and a bed opposite the dresser. Another door is in the far corner, which Sans assumes is the bathroom. There’s a table beside the bed, and on it is a pad with paper and a pen.

He picks them both off and scrawls his name and number on it, ripping off the page and giving it to you. “the dude that kicked you out looks like another bad time waiting to happen, so if he shows up here, don’t be afraid to call me, ok?” 

The hand that takes the paper is a little shaky. Your eyes skim over the words written, and the corner of your mouth quirks. “’Sans’? Like the font?”

He shrugs. “i get that a lot. anyways, i need to get back, paps is worried probably.” He points to the paper in your hand, shooting you a reassuring smile. “remember, dude’s a bad time. call me if he comes back. or call if you need help in general. seeya.”

With a blip, he’s gone, and you stare at the space (now replaced with air) he was just in. The most dumbfounded look creases your brow.

“…What the fuck did he just do?!”

Funnily enough, after the incident, he cannot stop thinking about you. He passes the place you used to live every day, and when he does he wonders if you’re okay. He’d check on you, but he did say that if you had a problem to call him. So he leaves the situation be, letting it be in your ballpark. If you need him there, you’ll call.

It’s been a long day, so he decides to go to Grillby’s for some ketchup and conversation. It’s been a while, and he hasn’t visited the surface expansion of Grillby’s very much, so he should fix that.

He teleports just outside the entrance and strolls in to a chorus of greeting from the regulars. Doggo, Greater Dog, and Lesser Dog are wrapped up in a game of poker, with Dogamy and Dogaressa watching on the side and holding each other. There’s a couple humans hanging around, along with a few monsters that didn’t usually frequent the establishment underground milling about. He waddles to the bar and hops into a bar stool, leaning on the counter and sighing, eyes shut.

“heya grillbz, what’s cookin’ good lookin’?”

A snort is his answer, but it sounds nothing like his favorite fire elemental.

He opens up an eye to see you, clad in a button up dress shirt with black slacks, an apron tied around your neck and waist. You look nothing like you did that night, which relieves him so much. There’s a hit of yellow and purple on your hands from the bruises you sustained, he notices, as you clean out a glass with a towel. Your nose is scrunched up from the bad joke he made, a small smile lighting up your face and causing a soft hue of blue to blossom on his face. 

“kid? that’s you?” He asks, opening his eyes fully, now very alert. 

“’Kid’ is not my name, but yeah, it’s me.” You also throw in your name, since you’ve neglected to tell him. Wow, your demeanor has changed completely since the grocery store fiasco, and it’s such a breath of fresh air. It’s nice to see you smile, even if it is a smug smirk.

“well damn, you clean up nice. how ya been doin’? i’m assumin’ the guy hasn’t been bothering you?” At the mention of him you tense, which leads him to backpedal, “wait, shit, sorry–”

“It’s fine! It’s fine.” You cut him off, the smirk having been wiped off your face and replaced with a small frown. “They uh, haven’t been bothering me. Haven’t heard a word from them since what happened.”

He relaxes at this. “good, good.” He breathes, slumping against the counter again. 

“…What can I get ya, Sans?” You ask, setting down the glass you were cleaning and propping your arm against the bar, quirking a brow at him. It’s sassy as hell and it isn’t helping that you’re gorgeous.

“your number.” He realizes what he said in the middle of saying it and slams his face into his palm as you laugh. “…i am so sorry. i’m used to crackin’ jokes like this with grillby.”

“It’s fine, it’s fine. What do you really want, though?”

Bless you and your nerves of steel. “uh, bottle of ketchup.”

An incredulous look crosses your face, but you grab one and slide it to him anyways. He twists off the cap and tips it back, almost spitting it out with laughter when you choke.

“Sans, the fuck?!” You stammer, and he wishes he could take a picture of your face because it’s so priceless. Maybe your nerves aren’t as solid as he thought.

If somebody told him six months ago that he’d fall head over heels in love with a human, and a human that initially hated his innocent soul of a brother no less, he’d laugh and call them crazy.

Thinking about it now, it’s not as crazy as it seemed. 

Because with every laugh and smile he gets from you, his SOUL thuds a little more forcefully in his chest, his face a touch blue-r, and he finds himself trying so hard to get them out of you that he doesn’t notice how deep he’s getting into this.

He doesn’t notice until his brother does.

“goin’ to grillby’s, want me to bring you back somethin’ paps?” He asks, sticking his head into the kitchen. Papyrus isn’t as oblivious as everyone believes him to be, and he proves it now as he smiles knowingly at his older brother, which only causes said brother to raise a brow bone in silent question.

“BROTHER, YOU SEEM TO BE GOING TO GRILLBY’S A LOT IN THESE PAST FEW MONTHS.” Papyrus stops stirring the pot of noodles he’s attending to on the stove to look at his brother. He notices, but it’s not like Sans makes an effort to hide it. He can see it in the way that he smiles sometimes when he gets a text from you, or how excited he is when he knows he’s about to see you.

He know what Sans looks like when he’s obsessed about something, or worried, or determined. Papyrus thought he’d seen it all. You’ve brought out a different side of him that Papyrus loves to see, because he look so happy nowadays.

“yeah, so? i used to go everyday when we were underground.”

“SANS, DEAR BROTHER, NOTHING EVADES THE WATCHFUL EYE OF THE GREAT PAPYRUS!” He exclaims triumphantly, pulling out his best smile. “…I am happy for you, Sans. I hope you bring them by soon to introduce them to me, because I would like to thank the person who has given you so much joy.”

It’s a rarity when Papyrus speaks in a regular volume of voice, and it shocks Sans to his core. “whaddya mean, pap?”

Papyrus laughs, turning back to his pot. “OH BROTHER, DON’T TELL ME YOU HAVEN’T NOTICED!”

“im-pasta-ble, i notice everything.” Sans’ smile turns wicked as Papyrus screeches out a warning to him and then he blips out of the way of the taller’s wooden ladle being thrown at him.

It’s become a habit, for him to watch you as you work. The way you move around the tables at the restaurant, the polite smile you give to the customers and the drastically different smirk you send him when he tosses out a pun, the lingering touch between you two when you give him a ketchup bottle. 

It kills him, in a way, because he knows what he’s feeling. He knows very well what this feeling is. His love life isn’t a very active one, but he does remember a few years back when he used to have a crush on Toriel, and this feels like that except new. It’s no longer a nice thought, but a fire that consumes his thoughts whenever he sees you. It’s not the heat of the blush on his face, it’s the ghostly imprint that your fingers leave on his. His SOUL doesn’t flutter, it beats purposefully. He knows what this is.

However, it’s not him that says or does anything about it.

As your shift comes to a close and he prepares to leave, you stop him. The place is almost empty, just a couple people wrapping up their meals or nursing their last drink. You look nervous, teeth gnawing on your bottom lip.

“what’s up?” He asks, and he almost jumps when you set a hand on ones of his, the one still on the counter top.

“Uh…There uh– There must be something wrong with my eyes, be-because uh–” You clear your throat, and he’s never seen your face go so red, wow. “Because I can’t take them off you?…”

He pauses for a moment before the statement processes through his head and his face goes full cerulean. “uuuuuuhh….”

“What…What I’m trying to say– Is it hot in here? Jeeze.” You tug at your collar, smiling sheepishly. “But uh. I was wondering if maybe you’d like to, I dunno, go see a movie? Or go somewhere for coffee? I’m sorry, I just really, really like you and I couldn’t be quiet about it anymore–”

You stop when you notice his expression. The poor skeleton’s face is completely blue, and his pupils have morphed into tiny hearts. He grabs your hand gently, and before he can chicken out he sputters out a reply.

“yes, hell yes. i’ll uh, i’ll text you later?”

It’s take a moment to sink in but when it does you smile so wide that it triggers his own. “Yeah! That’s cool! I’ll uh, be waiting? Yeah.”

Reluctantly he lets go of your hand and waves with his other, before disappearing and reappearing at the entrance of the inside of his home. 

You asked him out. You asked him out. He’s so giddy, he struts farther into the house and laughs, and it’s such a happy sound. He’s never heard such a sound come out of his body.

“YOU SOUND PLEASED.” Papyrus notes from his spot on the couch in the living room, wherein he’s doing some sort of human exercise program. Sans just beams in reply, hopping up the stairs two at a time to get to his room. “WHAT’S HAPPENED?”

Papyrus knows. He just wants to hear Sans say it.

“bringing them over later this week. you’ll see.”

DL (Plushie Skit)- Ending Episode 12 CGs (Shu)

Subaru’s Version: http://totallydiabolik.tumblr.com/post/156904744644/dl-plushie-skit-ending-episode-12-cgs-subaru

I believe many fans love the final conversations with the boys~

Here is the video in case you do not know what am I talking about:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bY5-OIGR-M8


I love those incorrect sub title pictures!! I have to screen shot them all~

But What if it’s not incorrect sub titles? It’s “incorrect” pictures?


So IDK why, but my brain was like “HEY use this as your skit!”

Well.. The Super Hot Scenes I just ruined with my plushie Shu LOL

Now it’s just funny and cute and like “Oh Yeah Plushie what do you want to do huh?”

And I am doing Subaru’s version now, I’m such a sinful woman…

You can yell at me if I ruin your hot Shu OWO

(Again, if Shu is in his uniform this will be perfect damn it! I should get a uniform Shu!)


(That Smirk on Plushie it’s kinda creepy O.O)

The last picture makes me laugh!! He just like “mommy I want food” *innocent face with watery eyes* 

BTS Reaction- Kinks

Can i ask for a reaction? When you use or say something that is his hidden kink accidentally or you didn’t know about it. (idk like tigh highs, i love to use it)

Warning: The gifs are a bit explicit in this post and if you are sensitive to these kinds of stuff; please don’t keep reading ^^

Keep reading

Why Tanaka x Yamaguchi should be a thing!

Tanaka physically/vocally showing his happiness toward Yamaguchi’s success

Got super angry when he thought Tsukishima wasn’t being supportive

THIS WHOLE SCENE IN GENERAL!

Also……

Yamaguchi already thinks he’s hot ;)

2

Heaviest oil deposit’s always on the first key used – that’s quite clearly the three – but after that the sequence is almost impossible to read. I’d say from the make that it’s a six digit code.

How To Flirt With & Insult People Simultneously: A Guide by Sherlock Holmes

The Phantom

One Two Three Four End

vampire!au taehyung x reader

drama

1,723 words

anon nymph wished – hello :) can i request a vampire taehyung scenario? he doesn’t know you personally, but he is attracted to you yet in order to keep you safe he tries to stay away, you don’t know he is a vampire but you’re attracted to him as well, his mysterious look draws you in, idk how they’ll end up together (probablt tae resisting until the end) but you can include some steamy hot feeding scene /\ thanks :)

hello love! You are my first request on this blog and I thank you! So- I have a question for you?! I got carried away with this ask >.> as you can see, this drabble is quite long.. do you mind the fact that I will have to make this into a series type? I hope not >.> Because lets be honest, vampire!au’s, ohhhh boy lol! Please let me know if you like the idea, and if not, I’ll make the second part as short as possible okay love?

-Pasithea

Keep reading

shameless

ok i have some thoughts:

1) i havent been watching cuz the show is trash, literally just watched this episode and skipped everything that wasnt mickey related cuz this show lost my love a long time ago but ill be damned if i dont see mickey

2) fuck fiona with her wanting him to be safe shit she literally just went              ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ when ian went missing last time so she can fuck right off - also when the fuck has she ever been in a healthy relationship? shes a hot fucking mess (am i making it too obvious that i dont like fiona?)

3) that scene under the bleachers and in the boat yard killed me and gave me life at the same time

4) mickey going from “hey i live in the alley behind your house” to “your son calls me daddy too” made me so happy 

5) cant explain how happy it makes me that ian got in the car but one concern - how is he gonna get meds? i mean idk i havent been watching but i hope he still takes them so hows that gonna work? we dont want it to all go to shit again

6) “lets ride” yaaassss

anonymous asked:

Did you like cursed child?

Some things were really nice, some things were ridiculous. I liked Harry and Draco’s conversations, Scorpius was a sweetheart. I felt like Hermione and Ron were more like their movie versions than book versions. I was annoyed by how Ron was just that stupid and “hilarious” friend. Generally, idk maybe I’m old and forgot all HP books, but it wasn’t the Harry Potter I knew and loved, it was more like I was reading a fanfic where:
- Draco was that hot, broken boy you just wanted to hug and comfort (◜⁎ˇ3ˇ⁎)ゞ
- Ron was a jealous prick picking on him and serving some boring lines that supposed to make everyone laugh ( ఠ ͟ʖ ఠ)
- Harry was awkward and generally tired and not very good as a father (I mean, that’s fine)
- Hermione was weird (that book cupboard thing, also toffie scene?????? wtf, Hermione/Ron scenes were a harlequin romance)
- Ginny was the most supportive woman in the galaxy
- Snape! sarcastic bamf with a heart of gold ╮(ಠ‿ಠ)╭ who saved the world
- plus two kids who didn’t know what they were doing: an emo with aunty issues and the sweetest cinamon roll.
All villains were so grotesque I can’t even. The gyöngyhajú lány. And that Voldemort au? What was even that? Dungeons of tortures?? Scorpion King????????? I mean… ლ(⊙_⊙ლ) The trolley lady was pretty normal in comparison with the rest… Like, tbh everything was just action (and that’s weird because some scenes didn’t move the plot much) and no emotions, the characters were rather shallow in my opinion (siriusly, not much depth) And why the heck it was about Cedric? We just don’t know ╮( •ิ_•ิ)╭
I wish I could watch it on stage (•́︿•̀) maybe I’d like it better…
So, did I like it? Meh. Do I accept all those things as canon? (╮°-°)╮┳━━┳ Hell no ( ╯°□°)╯ ┻━━┻

4

The way his Adam’s apple bobbles up and down.

Every time they make love it’s like a crime scene. Wipe down the room, wipe themselves clean, clear away any traces of evidence—the red lines on his back, the bruises blooming on the inside of her thighs, the way her fingers knit themselves in his hair, the way his body burns into hers, trembling mouths hot and pressed together, moans that sound like sirens, yearning for more, trying to be closer

Allura lets herself curl into his side when they’re finished, tracing lines into his chest her fingers, as if connecting constellations only she can see, inked into his skin. His heart is all star-crossed, in her mind. Fitting, she supposes, for the cruelty of how well they fit together.

Violent Delights

After the concert, Sorey sheds off the jacket of his tux in relief; the bright lights and full auditorium made the stage hot.

Mikleo scowls at this undress and how Sorey just throws it over a chair. It’s all so terribly unprofessional. At the very least, Mikleo plucks up the jacket to put away while Sorey starts helping Velvet pack up her cello. He draws away from the crowd of the orchestra and their friends and family and into the practice room where Sorey stored his violin case.

As Mikleo starts to neatly fold the jacket, his thumbs run across the black fabric that is still warm from Sorey’s body heat. A curious desire pulling at him makes him pause and stare, suddenly acutely aware of what he’s holding. Everyone is still distant in the music room, and Mikleo hasn’t turned on the light, thinking this would be quick but he lingers. After a moment, he unfolds the jacket and slips it on over his dress-shirt.

The sleeves reach his knuckles and the tails tickle his shins, the front swallowing his chest. In all, its roomy on his slender frame but the size difference doesn’t distress him in the least.

It feels like Sorey is holding him. Wearing the jacket, the scent of the cologne Zaveid doused Sorey in still lingers, but when Mikleo presses the collar a little closer to his nose, he catches a more familiar smell. Something warm.

Mikleo stands in the dark practice room in a black tux jacket that’s not his, remembering how Sorey looked on stage with his violin. He remembers it, and he pretends Sorey’s fingers were instead tracing the string of Mikleo’s spine.

anonymous asked:

buckle up I got an embarrassing story to tell: you know that scene in Not Another Teen Movie where Chy's character is in bed doing ~certain things~ and then the fam comes in and the vibrator flies out of her... well I just realized that this scene was part of my sexual awakening? I remember seeing this scene of this girl masturbating, didn't even know it was from a movie, and umm.. apparently it did.. things to my body? And made me think 'oh I wanna try that too?' (1/2)

and now I watched the movie a few days ago bc Chyler Leigh (!) and it’s daunting on me that.. it was this particular scene.. that made me idk horny(?) for the first time and I feel equally embarrassed and fascinated that even at that age (I was like.. 12?) I already had the hots for Chyler Leigh. Good god, this woman, is2g 😅

WOW