- Yuri don’t let yourself get baited into a dance
batt- I SAID DON’T GET BAITED INTO A DANCE BATTLE! GODDAMNIT YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO
BE MEETING SPONSERS!
- Victor! Mila! Stop encouraging them! AND STOP
- Victor you’re not even drunk! STOP DANCING WITH
THE SLOPPY DRUNK
- Why is there a stripper pole in here? Why is
this allowed to get out of hand? WHERE THE HELL ARE CHRIS AND THIS DRUNK’S
- Victor! DON’T LET DRUNKS HUMP YOU IN FRONT OF
SPONSERS! NO, YOU CAN’T TAKE HIM BACK TO HIS ROOM! I DON’T CARE IF YOU THINK
YOU’RE IN LOVE HE’S DRUNK AND YOU’RE AN IDIOT! I’LL TAKE HIM BACK TO HIS ROOM
BEFORE YOU MAKE ANY MORE BAD DECISIONS.
- *sends Celestino a strongly worded email about
keeping an eye on his pupils in the future the next morning*
- Victor stop. Stop pining. You aren’t in love. No
I don’t believe in love at first sight and I certainly don’t believe in love at
first drunken humping. You’re right I’m not taking this seriously. He hasn’t
contacted you because he was DRUNK OUT OF HIS MIND! Did you see how much booze
he downed? It’s a wonder he didn’t die of alcohol poisoning. Just stfu and
- Victor no. It’s not a message. Victor no! Don’t
give up your career for an ill-advised booty call! UGH if I can’t stop you just
make sure our Yuri doesn’t find out where you went.
- WHY ARE YOU IN JAPAN TOO YURI! I COULDN’T STOP
VICTOR MAKING AN ILL-ADVISED BOOTY CALL BUT YOU ARE TOO YOUNG TO BE ATTEMPTING
THAT! YEAH SURE YOU’RE NOT THERE FOR THAT I’VE SEEN YOUR ROOM! …NO ONE HAS 30
POSTERS OF SOMEONE IN THEIR ROOM BECAUSE THEY ‘HATE THEM JUST SO MUCH’ YOU’RE
FOOLING NO ONE KID!
- OMFG did you really give him a program about the
night he got sloppy drunk and you turned into even a bigger moron? You’re going
to put me into an early grave.
- MILA! STOP POKING THE SMOL ANGRY CHILD! HIS
SCREECHING HURTS MY EARS!
- Wait, why the hell do I have to go live with my
ex-wife and the angsty teen? I don’t want to have to listen to a list of my
failures or a catalogue of all the ways Drunk Yuri is the worst especially as
it tends to devolve into ‘stupid pig, how dare he be so good looking’.
- Victor stop trying to pretend this isn’t an
elaborate booty call. This is not how coaching works.
- I have the living legend who gave it all up to
be a pretend coach in order to get with a sloppy drunk, a sadist of a female
skater who stirs up trouble on purpose, an angsty teen who can’t tell the
difference between having a crush and hating someone and an emo skater who is
far too old to be as emo as he is. Kill me now.
- Maybe I was giving Victor a disservice. His
student is actually doing quite well and maybe they are taking it seriously and
HOLY FUCK NEVERMIND JUST KISS YOUR STUDENT IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE FUCKING WORLD
VICTOR YOU ASSHAT
- Yuri has calmed down and I’m just going to
ignore Victor. Yep that’ll work OMFG did you HAVE TO KISS HIS FUCKING SKATE?!?
THIS IS WHY YOU WEREN’T ALLOWED TO TAKE HIM BACK TO THE HOTEL ROOM! YOU HAVE NO
- You want me to what? Be his coach? Well…only
because I like Maccachin.
- You’re alright actually, I hereby allow you the
name Japanese Yuri instead of Drunk Yuri. You may be the only sane person I
know surprisingly. I still am going to tell you off for fucking up though.
- ….I take it all back. WTF was up with all the
- …They got engaged. Victor really is going to
marry him….I’m not even surprised at this point. Fine. Keep him Japanese Yuri.
He’s a pain in the ass anyway.
- YES! I AM A PROUD DAD/COACH! HAPPIEST I’VE BEEN
THIS WHOLE YEAR
- WTF? You’re coming back now? Idek what’s going
- Well done Yuri! I’m so proud of you for winning
- …They are doing a super romantic pairs skate
because of course they are.
- Okay so Victor is coming back to Russia to train
cool….wait what do you mean you’re still going to coach Japanese Yuri? WTF? HOW
WOULD THAT EVEN WORK? WTF NO.
Post Episode Twelve
- STOP FLIRTING IN THE RINK! WHY GOD WHY AM I
- STOP GROPING HIM VICTOR THERE ARE CHILDREN
- YURI P STOP THROWING THINGS EVERY TIME THEY FLIRT
Having a sibling is super weird because you’re constantly torn between “wow I can’t believe this is real oh man you’re a great sibling I really love and appreciate you” and “oh my fucking god I’m going to throw an axe at your face and commit homicide real soon if you don’t stop being so annoying I swear to god”
during the school year it’s mostly for events and even if at the beginning it’s kinda weird passing canons and an actual catapult on the way to school or finding soldiers sleeping on the tables in your class, you get used to it
okay, now for the actual story
i was playing
Pokémon go and i noticed that the military area had like five pokéstops so i decided to go there
now, it was locked. this was unusual, but i ignored it and got in through a hole in the fence
now i go to the first pokestop and get everything, everything’s okay
i go around the corner and there are soldiers everywhere
most of the are training
now, i understand i just broke into a military base
during the summer it’s an actual base where they are actually training
i’m about to go but
there’s a jigglypuff
there’s a jigglypuff on a soldier’s shoulder
and i will catch that jigglypuff
i sneak around carefully and catch the jigglypuff
i’ve done it
somone is touching my shoulder
i turn around
IT’S THE FUCKING COMMANDER
i can feel my life flashing before my eyes
i’m going to jail
i’m gonna DIE
he’s glancing at my screen
and he smiles
and then he asks me
‘caught anything good?’
his eyes light up
he took out his phone
and left me
somone came to ascort me out
i’m about to go
he yells ‘wait!’
and he showed me his
and that’s it
i’m still kinda in a shock
i broke into a military base to catch a jigglypuff, the commendar cought me and instead of getting mad he got exited cause he plays pokemon go
“Are you enjoying your meal sir?” Your waitress pointedly asked Seokjin, completely ignoring you sitting on the other side of the table.
Jin spared you a glance and let out a forced laugh to try to relieve some of the tension that had built up between you and the waitress. It had started from the second she had been assigned your table. She would not for the life of her take her eyes off Jin, and was overly friendly and every so often leaned a little too close, her chest nearly knocking into his head each time. You had been patient but your patience had only lasted for so long until you had finally gotten fed up. Jin clearly knew that you were upset and every so often smiled to himself, making matters worse. He was enjoying this. Once you had finished eating, you couldn’t help but be a little pouty as Jin drove you home. A few minutes into the drive you felt him poke your cheek and so you naturally turned towards him to find him smiling amusedly, “you’re cute when you’re jealous Jagi.” You simply rolled your eyes. Once you guys were parked outside your house, Jin grabbed onto your wrist before you could storm out. You turned towards him, knowing it was irrational, but nonetheless ready to lash out but were quickly stopped by the gentle caress on your cheek made by his hand. “Jagiya, please know that you have no reason to be jealous. I love you and only you. You’re the only one in my eyes and heart.”
“Goddammit Y/N, where are you going?” Yoongi called out after you as you stormed out of the boys dorm. It didn’t take long before he caught up to you, halting you by grabbing onto you by the wrist.
“She’s just a friend, how many times do I have to tell you that?”
“Yeah, of course she is because “friends” just sit on each others laps like that right?” You laughed sarcastically.
He remained silent for a few seconds before answering, “I didn’t know she was going to do that.”
“You didn’t seem to rush yourself in asking her to get off. Yoongi she has feelings for you for fucks sake don’t you see that?” You said, beginning to grow tired. It was always like this when she was around him. She would always flat out come on too him and he’d just make up for it by saying they were just friends.
He sighed, “I know she does. I haven’t said anything because she’s like a sister to me. I don’t want to hurt her, you know? I haven’t been fair to you, I see that now and I’m so sorry, I’ll talk to her today. Just please know Y/N that I don’t feel anything when she does any of that. She doesn’t make me feel what you do. Fuck she doesn’t even begin to compare to how much you mean to me.”
He had barely finished before your lips were on his. Yoongi was momentarily taken aback from the suddenness of the kiss before relaxing into it and instead pulling your bodies closer.
You both pulled apart out of breath, “I’m so-”
“Don’t apologize,” he cut you off with another passionate kiss.
“Who are you?” The female dancer beside Hobi asked as you walked into the studio during the middle of their dance practice bearing snacks.
“My girlfriend,” Hoseok proudly replied, wrapping his arm around your waist before giving you a kiss on the cheek.
The dancer’s eyes narrowed, her lips drawing into a sly smile. She had liked Hoseok from the second she laid eyes on him and couldn’t help but want to rile you up a bit.
“You’re not leaving are you? Why don’t you stay so you can see the choreo?” She asked you innocently.
You nodded excitedly, but those feelings of excitement were immediately replaced by feelings of jealousy as you saw just how intimate the dance was. Hoseok had warned you beforehand that the dance was meant to be sensual but you had never imagined for it to go as far as the dancer straddling Hoseok’s waist, ending the dance with a kiss to his jaw.
Although you remained calm in front of her, your facade fell the second you and Hobi were alone. Hobi knew you well enough to know that the cause of your silence was due to your jealousy and he couldn’t stand it for more than a few minutes before he broke.
“Jagi, don’t be mad.” You remained silent. Desperate to get your attention, Hoseok grabbed you by the waist and pinned you against the hallway’s wall.
Your eyes widened, “Hoseok, what are you doing?”
It was just at that second that the female dancer walked out of the studio looking haughty and proud of herself.
Before you even realized what was happening, Hoseok’s lips were on your as he gently lifted your thighs to wrap around his waist.
You heard the dancer cough awkwardly. Hoseok looked towards her sheepishly, “ahh I’m sorry. It’s just so hard to restrain myself around my girlfriend. She’s too damn sexy for her own good.”
The dancer looked a little shocked before she scurried out of your sights. Once she had left, Hoseok turned towards you and winked, “don’t be jealous Jagiya. She’s got nothing on you.”
“I know you’re jealous, but Y/N, please. Talk to me.” Namjoon begged, as he gently turned your cheek so you’d be facing him.
Your eyes were shining with unshed tears and Namjoon felt his heart break. He couldn’t believe he was to blame for the cause of your pain.
“Can you really blame me for being upset? S-she kissed you Namjoon.”
“She was drunk, Jagiya. She didn’t know what she was doing,” he tried to explain.
“You know. That I can understand. It still hurts but, what hurts the most is the fact that you were going to hide it from me,” your voice quivered.
“I didn’t want to upset you over something that meant nothing,” he reasoned.
“I would’ve found out eventually…I mean I did, didn’t I?”
He sighed, “I fucked up and I’m so sorry, Y/N. I just couldn’t bear the thought of you not believing me…God I’m such an idiot. I love you Y/N, please tell me you know that. I’ve never loved anyone as much as I love you. I didn’t even know it was possible to love someone this much until I met you. I should’ve told you, I should’ve been the first one to tell you. “
“Y/N, you have every right to break up wi-”
“Stop right there,” you cut him off, “yes, I’m upset. But how could you ever think I’d want to break up with you?”
“You don’t?” Namjoon looked shocked.
“Of course not! I love you so damn much, you dumb ass,” you smiled before leaning in to give him a kiss.
“Just please tell me next time something like this happens Joonie. There’s no one I trust more in this world than you so please don’t break that trust.”