idealised

someone: skinny people are hailed as stylish no matter what dumb shit they wear and fat people have to put hyper-gendered effort into their appearance every moment of their life to receive the bare minimum of basic human decency and this is pretty shitty.

every skinny person in a 300 mile radius:  this is targeting me personally, i will have you know that every morning at breakfast my own mother callously asks if i want seconds. seeing my figure praised in literally every form of media humanly possible is actually extremely traumatic because i hate knowing that i’m societally idealised. i was born with glass bones and paper ski

Escapists 

Aries: escapes to a place where nobody can see, question, or regulate them and they are answerable to only themselves. they can disappear for short periods

Taurus: slows the mental and physical operation into a state of timelessness where nothing and no one else exists 

Gemini: leaps into another point of view/position of consciousness to escape and experience a different perspective 

Cancer: goes into solitary confinement with the company of imagination, ideals, and memories, can try and change the way they feel about a memory to escape their true emotions about it 

Leo: escapes themselves and raw exposure by playing another role or character, pretending to be somebody else 

Virgo: escapes into the structure of dense ritual and constant, over-extensive activity to avoid being alone with themselves and their thoughts 

Libra: ascends into the idealised mind and applies their rose-coloured glasses of elusion to create a reflection of the world in their dreams and escape reality as it is

Scorpio: disinterested in escapism, scorpio is rather preferable to confrontation, truth, and facing your demons

Sagittarius: leaves the country, or moves houses to escape everything, intense physical activity

Capricorn: too busy to consider escapism, but can do this through intense solo focus and discipline, working and improving quality of work can be an escape from the private, personal, and introspective life  

Aquarius: frustrated and bewildered by people the aquarius escapes into the celestial sphere inside the mind where they can construct utopia

Pisces: escapes reality without trying, such as through lapses in concentration. mostly willing to consume any vice or vessel that provides a hiding place like reading, sleeping, sacrifice, substances, daydreaming, sex, or creativity 

My favourite Strange Superstitions and Beliefs

1. Ringing Bells - During the rein of Queen Elizabeth, it became popular to ring bells to ward away evil spirits, especially those at the foot of the bed as it was said to frighten them away. They were also rung during prayers to guide departed souls.

2. Curse of the Opal Stone - Some people believe opals are evil and unlucky. The superstition stemmed from the best selling novel ‘Anne of Geierstein’ by Sir Walter Scott in 1829 where Lady Hermione was falsely accused of being a demon as she dies shortly after a drop of holy water accidentally falls on her opal jewellery and changes its colour. This book had such an effect on the image of the Opal that shortly after its publication, the Opal market crashed and Opal prices dropped by 50%. Some say it is only bad luck to wear opals if you were not born in October.

3. Counting Crows - Apparently it was once thought that counting crows flying overhead could tell one’s fate. “One’s bad / Two’s luck / Three’s health / Four’s wealth / Five’s sickness / Six is death.”

4. Eye twitches - Though there is not much information about how this English superstition was idealised, it is said that in one of your eyes twitch, you are bewitched.

5. Gravestones -  If you align your gravesite (beforehand!) north-to-south you’re a witch.

6. Domovoi -   A common Russian superstition is that one must never shake hands, kiss, sleep or sit near a threshold such as a door. Thresholds are where brownie-like creatures known as domovoi dwell and kissing or shaking hands is regarded as an offensive invasion of their space.

7. Yellow - In Russia, superstition people believe yellow to be a sad and unlucky colour.

8. Candles - In a candle blows out by itself, especially during rituals, it is a sign that evil spirits are near.

9. Chills - If you get a sudden shiver or chill, it is a sign that someone is walking over your eventual grave.

10. Sparrows - are said to carry the souls of the dead and it is unlucky to kill one.

I went to see a talk by Colin Gibson, the production designer of Mad Max: Fury Road, and one of the most mind-blowing tidbits I learned was that when the Green Place turned sour, the matriarchal Vuvalini took their girls and fled, but they left all the boys behind. Those boys, left to die in the poisoned bog, became the Crow People we see walking on stilts:

Gibson also said they chose white paint for Immortan Joe’s war boys because (and I quote) “fat white bastards killed the world.” The Vuvalini were conceived as the opposite extreme to this, the opposite of the “fat white bastards” - but their way and their culture is still a dead end, and their callous disregard for male children is no better than Joe’s callous disregard for female children.

This makes the ending of the film, where the wives and Furiosa take the Citadel in order to build a new society, even more important. Neither Immortan Joe nor the Vuvalini had the correct ideology, but the wives and Furiosa do. Thanks to their long journey in the Wasteland, they are placed in a position to fashion and rule a more idealised, peaceful society, one based on equality across race, class and gender.

Dag, the pregnant pacifist, took the seeds from the older, violent generation so she could build a new, peaceful one. Capable showed empathy and kindness towards Nux even though she had been abused by men her whole life, and will surely show the same empathy to the war boys and war pups left behind. Toast the Knowing, observant and intelligent and ready to lead, took the wheel from the dead tyrant at the end and eagerly helped raise up the oppressed classes at the Citadel. Cheedo the Fragile turned her fragility into her greatest strength, proving that gentleness is not weakness in this barbaric world.

Furiosa forged a relationship of complete respect and equality with Max that helped her overcome the trauma she suffered at the hands of men. She achieves catharsis by killing Joe and loving Max and the wives, emerging from it all ready to begin again, ready to leave the past behind and step into the future.

We see many different tribes and cultures in this film and are presented with many different methods for survival, but only one that is really worth fighting for. The love, trust, respect and equality that exists between a ragged band of strangers in a War Rig thus becomes the prototype for the new society that will rise from the ashes when the Citadel falls.

Marylin Monroe said, “If they love you that much without knowing you, they can also hate you the same way.” All idealisation is punishing and sadistic.
—  JACQUELINE ROSE
WHAT YOU ENJOY BASED ON YOUR SUN SIGN
  • ARIES: being expressive, sports, fidgeting, moving around, impulsiveness, living in the moment
  • TAURUS: fashion, relationships, money, materials, food, tranquility, peace, routine
  • GEMINI: voicing your thoughts, poetry, writing, journalism, religion/cultures, doing something new, realism
  • CANCER: art, helping others, being/feeling at home, family, pets, children, elders, music, routine, memories
  • LEO: theatre, art, being generous, standing in the spotlight, singing/dancing, pets, being the best, winning, competition, confidence
  • VIRGO: books, learning, someone who takes care of them (they won't do it themselves tbh), when everything is organised and clean, honesty
  • Libra: again; honest, love, jewellery, pretty things, pets, relationships, crushes, attraction, tranquility, the little things, happiness
  • Scorpio: the unusual, the quiet, mischief, mysteries, poetry, art, books, music, instruments, anything abstract, "weird" things/people, dark humour
  • Sagittarius: happy things, idealised things, travelling, thinking philosophical, cute smiles, walking, running, humour, sports, being sassy or brave
  • Capricorn: work, family life, good finances, stability, honesty, sarcasm, old things, books, literature, responsibility, close friends, manners
  • Aquarius: friendship, travelling, adaptability, change, the strange, humour and wittiness, freedom, equality, experiencing different things and feelings
  • Pisces: dreams, art, music, abstract things, innocence and cute things attract you, strange and weird things, being themselves, being loved, overthinking... jk they just always do that.
Some Thoughts: Storm in the Room

With the reactions post-Storm in the Room, I feel that Steven doesn’t get enough credit. Going to Rose’s Room, searching for answers, and comfort even though he didn’t know that yet, Steven wasn’t setting out to create a perfect mother or project himself the ideal version of Rose. He starts, the moment he enters the room, by saying he knew it wasn’t real.

Everything Steven did with Cloud Rose, everything that happened between them, were reasonable assumptions we could make of Rose. And this is because the Rose we saw was from Steven’s expectations of what she would be like. And Steven was wary about idealising Rose the way the Crystal Gems did. He says this explicitly several times. Also, Steven’s view of Rose was tempered early on by Greg’s stories of her. 

So the Rose we see isn’t a sad Steven’s attempt at finding the perfect mother figure. Steven’s attempt at a reasonable and believable portrayal of Rose deserves to be acknowledged. Had it not been the case, the Rose we saw could not have evoked the feelings she did. It’s because of the depth Steven introduced to her from all his memories of her that it was made possible.

And what I want to talk about in this post, is how the images of Rose reflect which narratives he’s channeling as he tries to piece together, quite literally, the image of Rose.

The first appearance of Cloud Rose shows her with messy hair, parts of it stick up and around her. Her facial expressions are often wiggly, for lack of better word, and she shows her thighs a lot more than in the succeeding scenes, either in cross-sitting or running. 

This Rose is goofy and funny and casual. And it’s the Rose whom Greg’s stories have constructed in Steven’s memories. 

The same scenes we see Rose hitch up her dress in the same way (such as when she’s reading books with Greg on the bed) or similarly goofy, like stopping a ferris wheel with her bare hands, she’s with Greg. 

Even the line Steven takes from her video in Lion 3: Straight to Video, about “every X being unique and beautiful” is shot in Greg’s presence. Without realising it, Steven is remembering this image of Rose.

And she cares about Steven. She engages in his interests. It’s not so far a stretch because some episodes back, Bismuth was willing to do the same thing. Rose was a fun person. There’s a running joke that she would have loved cheesy and corny jokes. She probably told a few in her day. 

She probably wasn’t always as poised as presented in her portrait. Greg remembers the Rose he changed, when she was starting to understand human beings in earnest and come to terms with how they could exist with gems on the same level. 

Rose at that point still didn’t want to talk about her past, and Greg never made her. So Greg and Rose made new memories and didn’t dwell on the old. And those memories were filled with fun and laughter and love.

The moment sobers when it is Rose not Steven, who gestures the latter to sit down and stare at the expanse of clouds.

And we should know that what we’re about to see means something has changed. The first hint is that Rose’s body language changes. She sits perfectly straight, even though she’s cross-sitting the way she was earlier. And we don’t see her legs anymore. Her hair neatens and her expression calms.

What’s more, her hands assume the position Garnet did in Here Comes A Thought in Mindful Education. And that emphasises the kind of role Rose plays in this moment. Steven felt Rose taught Garnet how to manage her feelings, because it was a motherly thing to do. In a very Steven Universe fashion, the music changes from the bright xylophone to a quiet piano music, which is the mark of another Crystal Gem, Pearl. 

And when we go back to the senior Crystal Gems and their image of Rose, it is exactly the way she’s presented.

Cloud Rose is a huge presence, with Steven a small child by her side. She speaks deliberately, every word is one of wisdom. She is magnanimous and comforting at the same time. 

She tells him, “But we’ve been together the entire time.” And it brings back the idea of how our parents are always with us, and a part of us, because one way or another they’ve left a mark on us.

At the same time though, the similarities of the scenes between this moment and the one at Rose’s Fountain in An Indirect Kiss, lead to the same end.

Rose is viewed as a godly icon, very distant from Steven. She’s not sitting beside him, playing with him, kneeling on the ground anymore. He looks up to her, and he can’t reach her.

In both times, he realises she’s not really there. That he talked to the statue of Rose in the fountain, confided his deepest insecurities about how he didn’t know how to feel about her when everyone else did, parallels the empty image on his phone.

And it segues into the next scene perfectly.

Because Steven doesn’t know how to feel about Rose. Now, he’s more certain than ever that he doesn’t even know who she is. The Rose we see at the end has a blank face, because Steven can’t project anything on it. He’s thinking of Pink Diamond’s shattering, Bismuth, and the Rebellion, and all the people hurt by them.

When he sees Rose, he can no longer see himself, which is why her eyes, one of the facial features most like Steven’s, (next to his nose) are nowhere to be seen.

And this Rose is distant, because there’s no mitigating narrative linking him to her. In the other scenes, the room remained the same, because these stories he was told of Rose and who she was firmly rooted the first two Roses as part of the real Rose’s identity.

This Rose is foreign, because nowhere in those narratives did Steven think it possible to for her to do the things he learned she did.

And in that moment he begins to doubt. 

Because he can no longer see the image of his mother, he doesn’t know where he himself stands. A huge part of his identity is being Rose’s son. What happens when the “Rose” part becomes fuzzy, blurry, and unintelligible?

What happens to the Steven?

Notice that this Rose is silent. She offers no response to the accusations Steven hurls at her, about all the people she hurt and her act of leaving them all behind. 

At this point, we see the part of Steven that understands Rose is gone. That he’s never going to get these answers and there won’t be an explanation coming from her.

There are some things he’ll never get to hear about, some memories he’ll never know, some experiences he’ll never share with her.

And it’s sad and disheartening and lonely. In losing his idea of Rose, Steven loses a part of his identity. Such that he felt it would be better if he denounced Rose, cutting off the part of himself he didn’t want to think about: That he was created just to fix her mistakes.

It’s then that we see Rose’s face for the first time since we’ve entered the paradigm of Rose-through-Steven’s eyes. Not Greg’s, not the Crystal Gem’s. Because these new things he’s learned about Rose are things the others would never have known without him. How else would they have heard the Diamond’s song of mourning? How would they have known Bismuth was there all along?

And the things Rose said in the tape were meant for Steven, in a space only Steven could find.

The Rose speaking to Steven at the end is the Rose who’s already spoken to Steven directly before, through the tape.

A lot of negative reaction has been given to this moment, because it feels as though the tape absolves Rose of everything she’s done. It doesn’t and I don’t feel that was the point.

The point of her saying that, was to reaffirm Steven’s belief in Steven. To show that it wasn’t about Rose anymore, that Steven’s birth wasn’t about Rose but about him.

And it’s striking that’s the only time we see her face again. Because immediately after, Steven hugs her, and her face is obscured. 

That’s Steven’s recognition that he’s never going to hear any other words straight from his mother for him. He understands and he realises that nonetheless, Rose is exerting a presence in his life. He really is always with her and never alone. 

The past few episodes and everything leading up to them were about Steven’s realising his mother was still an individual, one who could made mistakes and rash, selfish decisions. 

He was afraid that upon realising his mother could be a selfish individual, could do huge selfish things that affected thousands of lives, he feared the act of his birth, the most personal thing about him, was meant to serve her self-interests alone too. He needed a concrete and tangible answer, which was what prompted him to go to the room. 

At the end of the episode, he didn’t think that anymore. He knows he has a lot of work ahead in figuring out Rose’s place in his life, but the lingering doubt of the very foundation of his existence is gone.

And because of that, he finally feels comfortable letting her go.

i mean when you’re on social media it’s really easy for people to cultivate a flattering image of themselves and it can be really easy to be trusting of those representations! but people aren’t always like that out in the world and there are people who don’t show their toxic behaviours online … stay hesitant about making judgements upon someone’s character if you’re just like distant mutuals or w/e. it’s so easy to idealise a stranger whose online presence is endearing … be safe

Thoughts on Getaway Car

So I just have a lot of feelings regarding Getaway Car and needed to get them out and I didn’t think it would be this long but here we are.

  • Oh my god I just love this song so much, it’s so beautiful, both lyrically and musically
  • The way she sings certain words is just so beautiful (listen to her singing “I knew it from the first” and “he was running after us” and you’ll know what I mean)
  • It’s strange but it almost makes me feel dreamy, and it seems somewhat whimsical, especially during the chorus, and because of this it sounds and feels like freedom at first
  • But only when you listen to it fully do you understand the true sadness in it
  • This is song of tragedy: the tragedy of an unwanted relationship; the tragedy of a relationship that would never work out; the tragedy of a relationship that was doomed from the start; the tragedy of wanting to escape so badly you make all the wrong choices; the tragedy of wanting freedom, only to become lost when you obtain it
  • It is the tragedy of becoming so intoxicated by freedom that you don’t care about the consequences of obtaining it
  • Parts of it seem almost accusatory in tone, with him refusing to acknowledge his part in the tragedy – they were both aware this was a doomed relationship from the start but he’s feigning innocence
  • The chorus after the first verse has the original air of freedom about it – she’s escaped, the wind is blowing in her hair as she cruises down the highway, laughing with happiness and freedom, ignoring all the warning signs
  • However, the chorus after the second verse is more ominous, with it almost seeming to weigh heavily with a sense of foreboding – she’s realised their mistakes, but it’s too late, everything is crumbling beneath them
  • The way she sings “we’re both sorry” makes me so sad, it’s just filled with such regret and melancholy
  • There’s almost a sadness in her voice in the bridge when she describes leaving him, and 
  • When she sings “I’m in a getaway car/I left you in a motel bar”, there’s such a soft sadness to it but it builds up into confidence 
  • I love the reference to Bonnie and Clyde because they’re usually romanticised and depicted as a couple insanely in love, which is far from the truth – beneath this veil they fundamentally had a toxic relationship and committed horrendous crimes, and while this is obviously not what she’s depicting in this song, I think it’s similar
  • On the outside, to the media, to the public, they appear to have the perfect and idealised relationship, but underneath that it’s far from the truth – there are cracks that cannot be fixed, and they ultimately turn out to be disastrous for each other
  • Undoubtedly the media played a large role in this, referencing back to the second verse when she describes their relationship being turned into a circus, and ultimately ruining whatever romance they may have had, leaving them both with regrets
  • The outro has conflicting undertones of anger, determination, and confidence to it but overwhelmingly has an air of freedom surrounding it
  • Although she’s describing how she was crying and dying throughout this relationship that she thought would free her, there’s almost relief in her voice now that she has finally and truly escaped 
  • I can almost imagine her stealing the getaway car and driving down the highway once again as she originally had in verse one, but this time she is alone and free and happy
  • Despite the conflicting feelings the outro gives off, it doesn’t give one of self-pity or sadness and I love it for that. It describes an almost toxic relationship that she escapes from, and she shows that she is not broken because of this. I just love that whether she intended to or not, this song shows that you can escape from relationships that are unfulfilling or unhealthy for you, and you’ll be okay afterwards
  • So basically, it’s the best of both worlds: It has a beautiful and compelling melody while simultaneously having meaningful lyrics, especially when analysed in depth
  • Honestly I don’t know if this is what Taylor was thinking when she wrote this song, and tbh it probably wasn’t, but that’s what I love so much about music and poetry and art – it can mean anything you want it to
Typical Traits of Venus in the Signs

Where is Venus placed by zodiacal sign in your chart? Learn what Venus, the planet of luck, love, vision, expansion, and plenty, means in each sign of the zodiac.

ARIES:

  • flirt by being up-front, direct, and even daring 
  • aura of innocent charm, even when they are being childish and impatient
  • addicted to the chase and the intense passions of the moment


TAURUS:

  • possessive in love, and threatened by fast-paced, high-energy situations in the context of relationships
  • very physical lovers, with a great appreciation for scents, sounds, feels, and pleasing form
  • harmony and peace are important factors in the art and music they are attracted to


GEMINI:

  • their tastes change often, and it can be hard to know what to expect from one day to the next 
  • playful — some might even call them a tease
  • attractions often begin with words, as they tend to bond more readily on a mental level, but can keep a distance emotionally


CANCER:

  • predictable, sensitive, their egos are a little underdeveloped when it comes to love, but they have a lot to give in return: namely, security, comfort, and care 
  • they pay more attention to your feelings than your words, and observe you carefully
  • always worried they’ll be left high and dry, if you’ve hurt them, they’ll have a hard time forgetting


LEO:

  • they need to feel special, love is very important even in their physical expressions 
  • loyal and thrive on romantic attention
  • high expectation about every relationship, threatened by indifferent or impersonal behaviour on their partner’s part


VIRGO:

  • quite sensitive in love — even insecure — and this reserved, loner-like quality is part of their appeal 
  • very observant towards their partner, pointing out the flaws and  analysing every detail of their relationship
  • express their love through practical means and gestures


LIBRA:

  • have a polished manner in love, which sometimes makes them appear insincere or superficial 
  • have idealised images of how their relationship is supposed to be, always marriage-oriented
  • tend to seek balance in their personal environment, are quite picky


SCORPIO:

  • they possess you, and somehow make it seem attractive to be possessed
  • their emotion and intensity may seem overdone to those looking for a more lighthearted relationship
  • can be jealous of all of your attachments, but few will admit it


SAGITTARIUS:

  • idealistic lovers who want you to appreciate their beliefs, visions, and ideals 
  • when the going gets tough in their relationship, they have an overwhelming need to run away
  • romantic adventures, as well as a straightforward, even blunt, approach to love


CAPRICORN:

  • their loner-like behaviour can be attractive, dark realists
  • conservative and willing to commit, ready to give and gain support
  • faithful to a fault, even after a separation they will have a hard time moving on, constant lovers


AQUARIUS:

  • unique, rebellious, and  provocative, attracted to everyone unusual
  • understanding is the most important component in a relationship, value lovers who are also their best friends
  • like to choose their terms when involved in a relationship, and this can be challenging for a partner, as their terms can be changeable, but nevertheless some of the most unselfish people in love, rarely clinging or controlling


PISCES:

  • sweetly playful, a little moody, and perhaps a little irregular, you  won’t always be able to count on them
  • their sensitivity can be misleading at times, since they seem to enjoy it
  • they can be unreasonably attracted to states of suffering and martyrdom, so they easily get into the role of saving someone, or being saved. 

• New Moon: Initiation, fluid impulse, the feeling of spring, vivid idealisation, the mind opens for new horizons ;.

☽ Crescent Moon: Harvesting information and applying newly gathered ideas into preparation

☽ First Quarter Moon: Personal conflict and confrontation bought to the surface, resolution awaits, favorable initiation period 

○ Gibbous Moon: Time for change and adjustment, to straighten out physical and emotional ripples 

◯  Full Moon: The fertility ritual, elusion generates. The melancholic streaks sift in like fluid from a bank, the God’s call to be worshipped, inner lunacy is revealed 

○ Disseminating Phase: Lunar celebrations begin, this being the time of socialisation. Compassion and generosity is enriched 

☾ Balsamic Moon: To remember, to reflect, to pull the weeds, to sleep soundly 

3

this is a sloppy-ish comic about a strong headcanon of mine which is basically:

 hanzo, due to years of coping badly with life, sees genji in a very idealised, ‘always-a-child’ way, and can’t quite connect that to 35-yrs old actual genji(this is turn, makes genji feel like hanzo thinks he’s inferior). essentially: it’s hard work patching things together, but they try. 

(full hc rambles on this reply thread lol!)

Maladaptive Daydreaming Dictionary

None of these terms, other than Maladaptive Daydreaming (Disorder) and Fantasy Prone Personality are official. Some of them, such as para and character, are synonymous and just a matter of preference. Therefore don’t feel as though you have to use any of these, this is just a reference for people who want to understand more about their condition and the terms used by the community.

actuallyMaDD: A tag used by maladaptive daydreamers to share their experiences. Coined by @bpdrotten .
see also: MaDD

character: A person who appears often in your daydreams. Can be fictional, original or real (such as a celebrity). Maladaptive daydreamers usually develop strong emotional attachments to their characters and characters can be very well developed with detailed personalities, relationships and backstories.
see also: para, para-

Compulsive Fantasy: a lesser used term for Maladaptive Daydreaming.
see also: Maladaptive Daydreaming

daydreamingart: a tag used by maladaptive daydreamers to share art or writing about the content of their daydreams. Coined by @queenofdissocation .
see also: maddart

daydreaming: Just as in regular English, daydreaming refers to imagining scenarios while losing track of the real world. It is important to note that when maladaptive daydreamers refer to daydreaming they are usually referring to doing it for hours at a time if uninterrupted, whereas other people might think of daydreaming as zoning out for five minutes when bored.

daydream crash: A) when a maladaptive daydreamer is forced to come to terms with the fact their daydreams are not real, leading to discomfort and sadness or B) when these daydreams no longer have the same effect that they used to and no longer feel as good. Coined by @maladaptive-daydreams .

daydream self/dream self (or any variation): many though not all maladaptive daydreamers have daydreams that involve themselves. They may imagine a version of themselves that is realistic or idealised or anywhere in between. This character is your dream self.
see also: parame

(daydream) trigger: something that leads to a craving or compulsion to daydream. The most common trigger is music, followed by other forms of media such as TV, video games and books.

daydream universe/daydreamverse/dreamverse: the imaginary world or worlds where daydreams are set.
see also: paracosm

fantasy/fantasising: see daydreaming.

Fantasy Prone Personality (FPP): a personality trait that means someone has a strong, lifelong involvement in fantasy and imagination. Signs of FPP include delusions and hallucinations (such as having intense spiritual/paranormal experiences, experiencing imagined sensations as real and confusing daydreams with real memories) as well as spending over half your waking time daydreaming. Maladaptive Daydreaming is more likely to affect those with Fantasy Prone Personality, however being a maladaptive daydreamer doesn’t necessarily mean you have FPP. Check the Wikipedia article for more information.

imaginary friend: an imaginary person that someone pretends to interact with in the real world, for the sake of companionship, entertainment or (for children) play. Not the same thing as a character or para. Maladaptive daydreamers interact with their characters/paras in their daydreams, whereas imaginary friends are imagined as existing in the real world. Maladaptive daydreamers can also have their characters as imaginary friends, however.
compare: character, para

inhabitant: a less common word for para. Short for daydream inhabitant. Coined by @avpdkaneki .
see also: character

linear universe: a daydream universe with only one world, which usually has one main storyline (i.e. one series of events which the maladaptive daydreamer daydreams about). Coined by @ni-ghtdreams .
compare: multiple universes, non-linear daydreams

MaDD/MADD/madd - acronym, short for Maladaptive Daydreaming Disorder.

maddart: see daydreamingart. Coined by @queenofdissocation .

Maladaptive Daydreaming (Disorder): a mental illness characterised by compulsive daydreaming that takes over a large part of someone’s life, to the extent that it interferes with or replaces things like work, school, real-life relationships, hobbies, getting up and going to sleep. When daydreaming, maladaptive daydreamers are content and also feel the emotions that their characters/paras are feeling. At the same time, daydreamers often engage in a repetitive activity (e.g. pacing or rocking back and forth). When not daydreaming, they experience regular cravings to resume their daydreams and often have trouble concentrating the world around them. It is debatable whether Maladaptive Daydreaming is a disorder, addiction or other type of mental illness. Currently, it is not officially psychologically recognised as a mental illness, therefore it is impossible to have it diagnosed by a therapist. The term was first coined by Eli Somer in 2002.
see also: MaDD, MDD, MD, maladaptive daydreamer, Fantasy Prone Personality

(maladaptive) daydreamer: a person with Maladaptive Daydreaming.

MDD: mistakenly used as an acronym for Maladaptive Daydreaming Disorder. In fact, MDD stands for Major Depressive Disorder and the community has asked that we stop using the tag. To avoid confusion, use the acronym MaDD.
see also: MD, MaDD

MD: an acronym short for Maladaptive Daydreaming, proposed as an alternative to MDD. However there is still some confusion in that it could stand for Major Depression. It’s best to use the acronym MaDD.
see also, MDD, MaDD

multiple universes: a daydream universe with more than one world or timeline which the maladaptive daydreamer fantasises about. Coined by @ni-ghtdreams .
compare: linear universe, non-linear daydreams

neuronarrative: the intense, divergent imaginings of fantasy prone people. Neuronarrative refers to extensive daydreams that are often accompanied by a repetitive activity, although these daydreams/narratives are not necessarily maladaptive and do not necessarily make it difficult for someone to live their life. In other words, the term has no negative connotations. All maladaptive daydreamers are neuronarrators, but not all neuronarrators are maladaptive daydreamers. Coined by @autisticworlds .
see also: neuronarrator, Fantasy Prone Personality, traveling
compare: Maladaptive Daydreaming

neuronarrator: a person who experiences neuronarrative.
compare: maladaptive daydreamer

non-linear daydreams: daydreams that are not all based in one world or a series of worlds - daydreams that are more random in nature and don’t have much in common in terms of timeline and setting. Coined by @ni-ghtdreams .
compare: linear universe, multiple universes

para: see character. Due to the level of emotional attachment and the amount of time spent interacting with them, some daydreamers feel that ‘characters’ isn’t a strong enough word to describe the people in their daydreams. Para is used as an alternative. It comes from the word paracosm and was coined by @schizotypaldaydreamer .

para-: a prefix that can presumably be used in front of anything to show that it is from your daydream universe, though it is almost always used for people. For example, a para/character who is your friend in your daydreams would be referred to as a ‘parafriend’.
see also: para, character, daydream universe, paracosm

paracosm: an imaginary world. Typically a paracosm is quite developed and may have its own imagined geography, laws, people, places, customs, history, language, etc. A famous example of a paracosm is Middle Earth. You do not have to be a maladaptive daydreamer to have a paracosm. Check the Wikipedia article for more information.

parame: see daydream self. Short for ‘parallel me’ and also coined by @schizotypaldaydreamer .
see also: para-

thisverse: a word for reality/the real world, in comparison to a daydream universe or paracosm. Coined by @schizotypaldaydreamer .

traveling: a term created to be synonymous with Maladaptive Daydreaming but without the negative connotations, for those who don’t find their extensive imagining to be a problem. It has since been replaced by neuronarrative, which is not synonymous with Maladaptive Daydreaming. Coined by @autisticworlds .

Feel free to add any other terms that you think are relevant, as long as they’re being used by more than one person (otherwise it’s just individual preference).

youtube

Here is the Metallica “Nothing Else Matters” intro section to 13x01 Lost and Found (and the season’s opener) thanks to Wayward Winchester on YouTube.

These season openers often narrate the thematic arc and its threads to come, and this one does so beautifully.

Firstly, there is an extended sense of family here. So when Metallica croons “Nothing else matters,” that is, thanks to the image juxtapositions, clearly a reference to family, but that family includes Bobby, Jodie, Eileen, Cas, Jack (ambivalently of course)  and even (for Dean) Crowley, as well as Mary, Sam and Dean. 

Family don’t end in blood = a key season theme. And one that also nicely sets up Wayward Sisters, as we get both Jodie and Claire shots.

We see first of all what has been lost and found (the episode is, after all, called “Lost and Found”).

Firstly, Dean finding Mary thanks to Amara’s resurrection, at the start of the previous season:

Then Castiel, also from 12x01 Keep Calm and Carry On, crashing to earth through the mystery spot sign after an angelic banishing.

These are the key figures who have been previously found (both resurrected after death, Castiel several times, Mary once) and are now presumed dead again, but will, of course, eventually be found by Sam and Dean once more as S13 progresses. 

Losing and finding Cas and Mary = emotionally central to the season.

“So close, no matter how far” croons Metallica, as Dean and Mary embrace.

 Yes, we know about Dean’s special connection to his mother and all the changes that connection has been through following her return from the dead, as Dean has had to confront her as a living person, not an idealised memory, but how he loves her still no matter what, and now longs for her once again.

This theme about growing emotionally through revisiting family trauma as an adult, a key theme last season, will continue to be key this season.  

“Forever trusting who we are,” sings Metallica as we get first a Sam/ Eileen hug and then a Dean/ Cas hug immediately following. 

Subtext alert - this direct parallel positions the two relationships as equivalent and therefore equally coded as romantic. Although, hello heteronormativity, this relies on the previous textual signalling of a Sam/ Eileen romantic interest, which took all of 5 seconds for the general audience to get and it’s 9 seasons and counting for Dean/ Cas subtext. However, the parallel is edited in here deliberately. Carefully juxtaposed with the words, “Trusting who we are,” which have a special meaning for LGBTQ+ people, because… that’s always a journey.

This Metallica song is, by the way, a love song, written by James Hetfield whilst on the phone to his girlfriend (see the Wiki page). 

Dean/ Cas continues as a subtextual thread this season (no surprises there, and no promises it will do anything except remain subtextual, but hey, I’d rather have you, cursed or not).  

“And nothing else matters,” Metallica continue as we get Winchester family photos, Sam, Dean and Mary hugging at the bunker, and both Sam and Dean helping Cas to his feet after he almost died following the stabbing with the Michael lance. 

Family is what matters and Castiel is included in the Winchester family. 

Metallica continues, “I’ve never opened myself this way,” as we look straight into Dean’s face.

Uh huh. This both references Dean’s “profound bond” with Cas, and his bond with his mother. The textual covers the sub-textual, as the next shot we get is of Mary. 

Sam’s grief at losing Eileen, is once again paralleled with Dean’s grief at losing Cas, as the song continues, crooning, “Never cared for what they say,” as we see Dean yelling “Nooooooo” at losing Cas to Jack’s power and then Eileen dead with Sam leaning over her sorrowfully.

We also see Cas’ death at the hands of Lucifer and Dean yelling “Nooooooo” again…

Key takeaway - the subtext is strong with this season… (although isn’t it sad that the trope of grief for a dead “buddy” as a permissible way to show masculine love persists, whilst a simple, living, reciprocated declaration remains so hard). 

The final shot of Jack, immediately follows Dean kneeling by Cas’ body, making it clear that, as far as Dean is concerned he lost  the love of his life his best friend and all he got was a shitty Nephilim in exchange: 

This places Dean, of course, in John Winchester’s shoes, who lost the love of his life, Mary (however much their relationship was full of fault lines) and had to become a sole parent to two traumatized boys. Dean is filled with resentment towards Jack, just as John clearly was about his situation, which, as we know, led to some bad parenting. 

So, the Sam and Dean parenting dichotomy - another key theme of S13  - is clearly set up here too and carries on as the episode progresses, with Dean wanting to kill Jack and Sam wanting to give him the benefit of the doubt. Because being parents themselves is bound to bring up A LOT OF OLD STUFF, such as Dean having had to be Sam’s parent and Sam feeling “tainted” with demon blood, hence his empathy for Jack as Lucifer’s son.

Overall, this is going to be an emotion focused season… 

Oh balls, here we go…..! 

neptune in the signs

neptune usually spends 14 years in each sign as part of it’s cycle. as the planet of idealism, illusion, creativity, escapism and spirituality, it tends to represent the cultural ideals of the time.

the aries generation: neptune was in aries from 1861 to 1875 and as such traditionally ariean traits like freedom and independence were in focus. serfdom was abolished in russia in 1861 and the emancipation proclamation of 1863 abolished slavery in the united states.

the taurus generation: neptune was in taurus from 1875 to 1889. this placement idealises security and material possessions and coincides with the so called “gilded age” in the united states. during this time, economic growth was rapid and many famously extravagant homes were built in areas like newport.

the gemini generation: neptune was in gemini from 1889 to 1902, and this generation particularly idealised intellect and communication. in the united kingdom, the “souls” group dominated intellectual life and in france this period encompasses much of the belle époque, during which writers like émile zola and colette first came to prominence. also, this period includes the beginning of the jewish golden age in hungary.

the cancer generation: neptune was in cancer from 1902 to 1916 and during this time the home and family life was idealised. the temperance movement and groups like the anti saloon league gained attention in the united states. the emergence of “new liberalism” in the united kingdom also saw the establishment of the foundational welfare state.

the leo generation: neptune was in leo from 1916 to 1929. the idealisation of youth, glamour and artistic expression can be seen in this period. the flapper subculture famously boomed in the united states and the growing film industry led to the creation of hollywood culture. in paris, many young expatriate authors published daring novels and created a scene where free expression was valued. 

the virgo generation: neptune was in virgo from 1929 to 1943. this placement idealises work, positive work ethics and education. many countries experienced a growth in labour forces and unionisation in this period and the “common man” was idealised in film, particularly in the work of directors like frank capra.

the libra generation: neptune was in libra from 1943 to 1957 and as such marriage and relationships were particularly idealised at this time. much of the post war period in culture was famously characterised by a focus on relationships and the “baby boom” is indicative of this placement.

the scorpio generation: neptune was in scorpio from 1957 to 1970, a period in which the idealisation of sex and transformation is particularly evident. in the united states, the sexual revolution began and psychedelic drugs and rock were tools of personal transformation. politically, protest movements in various countries show the desire for governmental transformation.

the sagittarius generation: neptune was in sagittarius from 1970 to 1985. in this period, the search for spiritual and philosophical meaning was idealised as well as different belief systems. eastern religions grew in popularity across the world and the televangelist phenomenon began. the 1970s are often known as the “me decade” due to the cultural focus on spiritual growth.

the capricorn generation: neptune was in capricorn from 1985 to 1998 and success and business were particularly idealised at this time. globalisation occurred at an increasingly fast pace and a distinct business culture developed, aided by technological advances.

the aquarius generation: neptune was in aquarius from 1998 to 2012. in this period, free thinking and inventiveness were idealised. the development of smart phones and the growth of the internet allowed for the development of new ideas. the emergence of social networks resulted in greater connectivity and understanding.

the pisces generation: neptune has been in pisces since 2012 and will be until 2026. during this time, compassion, spirituality and sensitivity will emerge as ideals. this can already be seen in the advances of the LGBTQ+ community and the growth of social activism.

There’s no such thing as the Dark Ages, but OK

As a very serious adult, with a respectable career and life, and a healthy ability to let petty shit slide, I spent much too much time last week arguing with strangers on the internet who believe in the myth of the Dark Ages.

The arguments in question focused on a massively inaccurate meme, which some observers of the group pointed out was originally supposed to be about knowledge loss after the burning of the Library of Alexandria, but which some very cool EDGE LORD had changed to be about ‘The Christian Dark Ages’. Please feast your eyes on it in all it’s massive wrongness:

This is, pretty obviously, a bunch of honkey bullshit and also massively incorrect, as many important scholars have noted. As a result, I spent hours of my life – which I will never get back -  pointing out repeatedly that the ‘graph’ in question has nothing to do with reality, and arguing with non-experts about the medieval period.

For the most part – these people were well-meaning. Many pointed out that this was a very Euro-centric world view, and that Asia, Africa, and the Arab world were all making huge advancements in scientific and medical theory at this time. That is absolutely true. White people have never been the entire world. The Chinese had a massively advanced scientific culture by this time, for example, and had been holding it down with hermetically sealed research laboratories since the third century BCE. The Arab world, meanwhile was compiling treatises on eye surgery. Scientific advancement was something that was happening in this period. Europe is not the centre of the world.

Having said that, while it is important to acknowledge that the-rest-of-the-world was making huge strides in scientific advancement during this time, and that Europe and white people are not the entire world, nor responsible for all of human advancement, there was no such thing as the Dark Ages in Europe either.

While everything about the idea of the Dark Ages is incorrect, lets start off with the way the term was meant to be used. The totally ignorant graph above, unsurprisingly, is completely fucking off. Hilariously, the idea of the ‘Dark Ages’ actually originated in the medieval period itself. Petrarch – the poet laureate of fourteenth-century Rome - was actually the originator of the idea that there was a period of stagnation that Europe was moving out of. Petrarch had a political axe to grind. He considered that any point at which Rome – where he lived and worked and had considerable sway – did not completely dominate the world was a BAD TIME. This is not an unbiased assessment of world history.

The actual phrase ‘Dark Ages’ itself derives from the Latin saeculum obscurum, which Caesar Baronius – a cardinal and Church historian - came up with around 1602. He applied the term exclusively to the tenth and eleventh centuries.  However, and very significantly in his use of the term, Baronius was not decrying a state of scientific malaise, or a particularly turbulent political period – he’s talking about a lack of sources surviving from that time.  Indeed, Baronius sees the cut off point for the dark ages to be the Gregorian reforms of 1046, following which we see a massive increase in surviving documentation. Witness an actual useful chart:

When we move into a period where there are more texts to be considered, Baronius argues, Europe moved out of the period of darkness and into a ‘new age’.*

Now this is some real talk. As you can tell from that graph, during the Carolingian Renaissance of the ninth century, we see a flurry of Latin writers emerge, and a lot of text copying. This drops off again until what we term the Twelfth-Century Renaissance – home to this blog’s favourite philosopher/proto-Kanye –  Abelard. (Shout out to my boy.) However, when people use the term ‘Dark Ages’ now, they usually use it to talk about the entire millennium of the Medieval period, and they aren’t talking about source survival.  They aren’t thinking ‘dark’ as in ‘occluded’, they are thinking ‘dark’ as in pejorative.

We can thank the Enlightenment historiography for the expansion of the idea that the medieval period was a bad dark time. Kant and Voltaire in particular liked to see themselves as a part of an ‘Age of Reason’ as opposed to what they saw as the ‘Age of Faith’ of the medieval period. To their way of thinking, any time that the Church was in power was a time of regressive thinking. The Middle Ages, then, was a dark time because it was so dominated by religion. 

The first push back against the term dark ages began with the Romantics. After the, um, unpleasantness of the Reign of Terror, and the major cultural and environmental upheavals of the Industrial Revolution it became fashionable to look at the medieval period as a time of spiritual focus, and environmental purity. Obviously this is a super-biased way of looking at the period – just like it was biased for Enlightenment thinkers to take one look at the primacy of the Church and declare an entire millennium to be bad. I mean, really what the Romantics were doing was just casting shade on the Enlightenment historiography because they felt like it inevitably led to the guillotine. But what can you do?

By the twentieth century historians had moved on from the idea pretty much completely. If you take the time to actually, you know, study the medieval period, it becomes very apparent very quickly that there was a tremendous amount of intensive thought happening. This is the era of Thomas Aquinas – a bad ass philosopher who will think you under the fucking table. Of Hildegard of Bingen – who basically founded scientific natural history in the German speaking lands. Hell, like we talked about last week Rogerius and Giles of Corbeil were throwing it down for major medical advancement. There was a lot going on. On the real, without the contributions of medieval thinkers you would not get Galileo, Newton, or the Scientific Revolution. The medieval period was not a period of stagnation, it was a time of progress.

But it’s not just that the idea of a ‘Dark Ages’ makes no sense when you look at what incredible advancement was happening at the time, it also makes no sense because it implies that stuff was going really well under the Romans. We estimate that somewhere between thirty to forty percent of the population of Italian Rome were slaves. The Romans had total bans on human dissection, meaning that there was no real way for medicine to progress any further than it had by the time of collapse – a problem that medieval people didn’t have. I mean even if you just want to make it about religion - the Roman Empire was Christian at the time of its collapse and had its heads of state worshipped as LITERAL GODS during the pagan era. Somehow every edgy motherfucker with a fedora is totally cool with this and thinks it is super reasonable though. Because ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. The Romans were not a bunch of really awesome people living a life of idealised rationality any more than medieval people were all ignorant savages living in fear of God.

Is there a time that historians use the term ‘Dark Ages’? Yeah, we do use it to talk about source survival rates. It’s not a term we use as a value judgment, however. We just mean that we don’t have a lot of evidence to go off of. By the same token – if we somehow move on to another electronic format without converting the way things are stored now, we could be moving into a theoretical Digital Dark Age, where historians in the future won’t be able to study what we are writing now. (And that would be a tragedy, because legit, I would kill to be a historian working on Donald Trump’s tweets in the year 2717.)

We’re now moving away from using the term Dark Ages at all, however, because of the frequency with which it is misinterpreted. I mean, if every basic motherfucker out there who never bothered to read God’s Philosophers (hat tip to James Hamman – this book is amazing) will insist on willfully misinterpreting us, we just ain’t gonna give them the ammo.

What it comes down to is that the medieval period was as vibrant as any other period of history. If you’re going to player hate, go ahead, but please don’t act like you know anything about either medieval or ancient history when you do. There is no period of rational supermen followed by ignorant monsters. There are just people doing their best in the circumstances.

* Caesar Baronius, Annales Ecclesiastici Vol. X. (Rome, 1602), p. 647. “Novum incohatur saeculum quod, sua asperitate ac boni sterilitate ferreum, malique exudantis deformitate plumbeum, atque inopia scriptorum, appellari consuevit obscurum.”

aquarians never disrespect lovers by idealising them or romanticising them. their common sense approach to relationships saves lovers from being saviours, they have natural respect and appreciation for partners, especially in terms of intellect and independence. your success is their success, when their partner succeeds, aquarius is as happy as anybody, it’s because their ‘best friend’ is winning at life. aquarius needs lovers to be best friends