Requested: Kinda yeah
Summary: Stan loves the Reader but hides it and is really good at hiding it. The Reader doesn’t know and Stan finally tells Reader.
Pairing: Stanley Uris x Reader
Warnings!: I dunno
A/N: It didn’t frEAKING SAVE
Stanley watched your bright eyes watch with interest and admiration as Ben spoke about his newest poetry ideas and writing. He’d been glancing up at you from time to time while he wrote about what birds he’d seen that day. In many ways have you caught his attention, you’ve laughed, smiled, talked, anything could get him to go back to watching you with lovestruck eyes.
Though he knew you were oblivious to his subtle hints of his love your you, he’d still try his best to tell you and through many failed attempts, he learned that it’d be easier to just leave it alone.
So now here he was, watching you talk with others while his pencil was pressed against the lined paper of his journal softly. He traced your features while the sun lined your hair, eyes, nose, and lips with a bright yellow glow. With his eyes, he stared in awe at your beauty, and with his hand, he traced out your features carefully onto his paper mindlessly.
As he came to realize he had been sketching you, he dropped his pencil and grabbed his eraser to furiously rub the surface of the paper. His eyebrows furrowed as he frustratedly cleared the page of the eraser shavings. You heard his pencil drop and looked behind you to see Stanley staring down at the page with his head in his hands. You could almost see the grimace cross his face in disgust. As he looked toward you, you gave a smile and he flushed before subtly returning the gesture.
After you’d looked away, he slowly looked down at the page with hesitance. There were slivers of you littering the former outline. He’d erased most of it but the chest tightening feeling was still there like the small traces of you were still visible. He sighed and let his head fall onto the book with an annoyed sigh. Stanley had never been so upset about any of his mistakes, seeing as he’s the one that always said to learn from them. But what could he learn from being embarrassed about liking you? Learn that you’d never like him that way?
Stan stared down at the paper for a second before grabbing his pencil from off the ground to begin writing on the same page. He leaned his head against his palm and mindlessly wrote down his feelings, his casually cursive handwriting moving in swirls like water.
He would always write “crappy” poetry about you when he’d get upset or just plain lovestruck. You’d take his breath away yet he couldn’t bring himself to tell you about his feelings. But your smile would bring something unnamable into his heart, something he couldn’t quite understand. You were a saint and everyone in the Losers Club knew, including Richie, who’d never admitted it but he knew.
You were a lovebird, a dove so sweet and pleasing. Then a meteor shining brighter than a sun, the fallen star that brought hope to the Losers. Showing them that any wish or aspiring dream could come true even in the darkest of times.
Because somehow, you’d always manage to bring some kind of hope into his and the other’s lives. The white feathers of your personality would leave its mark on the boy’s bluebird nest. But Stan was afraid to fly, for if he did, you’d fly too fast and leave him on the branch of loneliness by himself. And the shine of your fiery passing reminded him of a star, but you were something far greater. A meteor meant to take out even the most beast of humans with one bright smile. You were a blessing upon his life, the Goddess that lead him through the maze of childhood.
Stan wished he could impress you, but that would never happen. He’d get even the slightest of anxiety just staring at you, so how could he impress you? Make you love him the way he did for you?
He sighed and held his head again, pushing his pencil back down and pausing his writing. It would never be shown to you, so what was the point? There are so many others with better skills that could prove to you their love and win you over in a matter of seconds. Hell, even Richie, a trash mouth, could win your time over faster than Stan could ever even speak to you.
“It’s guh-good,” A voice appeared next to Stan and he’d finally noticed that Bill had been sitting next to him. Stan flinched and shut the book closed while his friend shifted to sit straighter next to him. “Yuh-yoh-you should show the-them.(Y/N), I muh-mean.”
Stanley stared down at the page before slipping it over to his side, “I can’t.” Bill watched his uptight friend for once worry for himself and not the others. “You… it’s too risky, they’ll never like me anyway.” Bill pursed his lips and stared ahead at the trees.
“I bet yuh-you’re wrong,” Bill’s lips quirked into a subtle but noticeable smile. Bill hung out with you more than anyone besides Ben, he was like a younger brother to you and he’d make sure you were okay every day. And every day, he’d listen to you ramble about your interest in Stanley. The close kept boy who cared but was left out most of the time interested you with his eyes that looked so happy when he’d finally see a rare bird, or when he’d smile from the dorkiest jokes he made. He was just plain beautiful in your eyes, but only Bill knew.
“I bet I’m right. I mean, look, Bill. I’m scared to talk to them and they probably think I hate them,” Stanley stared at the ground while his head hung lowly. Bill sighed and put a hand on Stan’s shoulder, squeezing it for him to look over.
“Tuh-talk to her, Stan. Trust muh-muh-me,” Bill smiled and patted his back before standing up and rolling his sleeves back up. He pursed his lips before smiling once again, “Good luh-luck.” As he turned around to walk away, Stan smiled to himself with a sudden adrenaline of courage.
Stan cleared his throat and stared at a dove flying overhead. His eyes widened and though he had a set religion, he believed that certain birds brought luck, and doves symbolized love and luck. Something he needed right now. Stanley stood up and took a deep breath before walking over to you.
You sat with Beverly, talking about life and how much you enjoyed the day. Stan held his hands behind his back and he fiddled with them. That courage practically disappeared at the sight of your smiling face. His eyes scanned you a second before clearing his throat of a forming lump.
“Uh, (Y-Y/N). Can I talk to you for a second?” Stan’s breath hitched but he tried his hardest to speak fluently. You looked up at him and smiled with a nod as Beverly got up to leave. Once she left, you stood up and walked with Stan to a far part of the Quarry.
“What did you need, Stan?”
He stammered and you felt your heart racing at the sight of his cheeks flushing pink. Your small interest gradually turned into the crush you feared. He’d never like you the way you liked him, right?
“I um, I think I love you.”