check please characters as brooklyn nine nine quotes
  • bitty: my moomaw always said, "bad news first because the good news is probably a lie." fun fact: she made me cry a lot
  • lardo: i was thinking about how i'd make the perfect american president. based on my skill-set, artistic ability, and bloodlust
  • shitty: fine, i accept my fate. just take a picture of my penis first, for posterity, then do what you must
  • ransom: what's going on? is this a dream? no, i'm not holding a label maker
  • holster: okay, this is everyone i could think of who'd want to mess with my life. the lax bros, teams we've beaten, the guy who lived underneath me in dorms when i was learning the gangnam style dance
  • chowder: so what is this? casual? serious? i need to know how to make fun of you
  • nursey: sexy train is leaving the station. check out this caboose! later sluts
  • dex: nursey, is everything okay? you never text me. look, the last message i got from you was august 3rd, 2015. you wrote, "sup, chowder?" followed by "never mind"
Artemis Fowl Blog Headcanons

Juliet: Feminism, self defense tutorials, contouring

Butler: Never reblogs anything, has default theme, only posts like twice a year

Foaly: IS the science side of tumblr

Minerva: Has a really elegant theme that she programmed herself, her blog title is really eloquent, but everything is kind of offset by all the weed memes

N01: Positivity blog, full of kawaii faces

Opal: Wildly successful beauty blogger that everybody only recently realized is a terf, like a million selfies

Holly: Nature/conservation, health tips, aesthetic

Artemis: Used to make a point of never posting any memes until he heard about the neo-dadaist thing and now he only posts memes, and only the most surreal absurd ones