BTS as things my father has said:
  • Namjoon: this may be the third day in a row we've gotten chilli's for dinner but i don't hear any of you complaining
  • Seokjin: *someone calls his daughter pretty* thanks. oh you meant her?
  • Hoseok: *laughing hysterically at viral cat videos from 2010*
  • Yoongi: *teaches own children how to illegally download music*
  • Taehyung: guys. oh my god. there's a frog in the garage.
  • Jimin: do not make me dance mediocre ballet in the middle of this JC Penney i WILL do it
  • Jungkook: *almost bursts a blood vessel trying to carry 12 bags of groceries in one trip*

in bart’s future the absolute worst thing you could call someone was a bugfucker. like, the reach don’t reproduce sexually and heaven knows why they’d want to bed humans. but it still became A Thing. 

when bart gets pissed at someone on the team (probably arsenal) he just blurts out “you bugfucker!” and roy I just sends him this terribly confused look. 

“kid flash, what the hell? the only one fucking bugs here is you?” and jaime’s just like “oh my god i want to die” and bart’s having an existential crisis and artemis is trying to figure out if she wants to laugh or give them a stern, comprehensive sex talk because she doesn’t even know if these small children of hers have been having sex or not. 

Just tell me to remake it while you're at the register

So I made this lady’s bowl wrong usually nbd I’ll ask if they want me to remake it and I usually remake it and it was only rice and beans and i accidentally put sour cream on it bc she was too busy not paying attention to her screaming children and looking at her phone and I ask if I should remake it and she’s like oh no dw and I’m chill nice

So literally 5 minutes pass and she’s back in line saying “he didn’t like it remake it” and I’m pissed bc she’s gonna talk to my manager and get me in trouble and god she was a piece of work

Also we’re out of corn tortillas and i explained it to her and she’s like “i want to talk to a manager” and so the manager over hears and she’s like “ma'am we didn’t get them in our delivery we’re sorry for the inconvenience” and she’s like “you usually have them” and our manager had to explain it again and she’s like “is there someone higher I can talk to?!” And she’s like “no I’m the general manager ma'am we don’t have them” “are you sure?” “Yes ma'am”

Tldr: if I make a mistake let me fix it when I ask to and don’t get into an argument about corn tortillas jfc act like an adult

Luffy will never let anyone touch Nami! 851 SPOILERS

so, just when Opera come to torture Nami, I want to highlight the “ironic” sense, certainly to not make the scene seem so awful for the children. And don’t forget One piece is not a seinen manga.  I talk about it now cause I want to explain an other thing which come after (just in case of some people arguing with - But Luffy insult her of “selfish person” …-) Please we all knows what is ironic what is serious

And  the panel which come after this is just…Oh my feels!!!

Look at this rage from Luffy, No one can dare touch Nami or Luffy will be mad! This panel show us that  HE IS WORRIED TOO! 

But she doesn’t care at all, she doesn’t went see him rap his hand, that all! She more worried for his safety then Her safety! And this is a serious dialogue where Nami proove how Luffy is important to her <3 

In blue we can see how ironic the scene turn into, But yelling “don’t be so selficsh” to Nami isn’t insulting her here. He want to save her fast before the end of the time and she doesn”t want either? She prefer died than seeing luffy tearing his hand! 

And that’s why she is obviously sad (what could she do to save Him from him?) do you see all this sad tears from her.

And this, until Jimbei save them, she is still crying!  (and thanks god! Luffy can hug her with his two arms!) Hopefully Jinbei kick Opera’ass, don’t imagine if Opera had try to hurt Nami, Luffy will not just kick his ass!!

but A chapter with two main Hint from Oda just almost confirmed LuNa <3 

isn’t our lovely queen and king the LONE SITTING DOWN ON A THRONE

and isn’t our beautiful navigotor who only have eyes for Luffy<3? look at her hand near to her heart when she looks at Luffy what a love i’m almost jealous XD! 

headcannon that maybe Percy and Annabeth dont have kids. maybe instead of having their own children, they go around adoption agencies and with the help of Grover, sniff out all the orphaned demigod children and raise them as their own.

I feel like Annabeth would be all about that bc she was treated like an unwanted freak her entire childhood and wouldn’t want any other kid to feel like that.

And so they would adopt all these demigod children and train them and pass on their knowledge and make sure they knew that they are so so so loved and Percy would be such a great dad to them he would always make sure they were happy and Annabeth would just hug them all the time and oh my god I can’t do this

Monsta X Reaction To Their Child Asking For A Sibling

It’s the cutest when children want a sibling~ ^^
Thank you, I’ll do my best!


“If your mommy agrees to this, ok? The decision is hers”


“Oh, dear wife! Did you hear that? Seems like our son is lonely and needs a sibling, what do you say?”


“Oh God, she wants a sibling! Honey, we’ve got work to do tonight!”
*Excited to think about having another child~*


“It means you will have to wait a long time if your mom agrees, you know?”


“Ah, it’s something your mom will have to tell you. If she agrees we’ll try to ‘get you’ a sibling”


“But… Waiting 9 months… This would mean I’d have to struggle again…”


“Anything for you, honey~”
Y/N: “Great that you care about my opinion”
“You know you want more children~”

I hope you liked it~
Feel free to request more!

anonymous asked:

Um... Oh God aunt Sara told me not to tell you who she's dating; but um dating Gabriel Leroy!!!! I guess you are our Dad and I should tell you. She's dating Maximilian Giacometti-Tommy

You’re dating Gabriel Leroy? Leroy? Like Jean Jaques Leroy? Like that man? MYSONCAN’TDATEALEROYI’MGOINGTOKILLTHATMANOHGOD

And she’s dating a Giacometti? Oh God, please tell me it’s not Chris’ son. Please, tell me. I don’t want my little baby perverted, I don’t. He’s going to use her. She’s not something to play with. NONONONONONONONONONONO

@ask–emilnekola hold me. I’m dead *faints*

the domestic au: biff
[start at the beginning]
  • root and shaw have a few conversations over the years about potentially getting another dog
  • “conversation” being a very very loose term that generally consists of:
  • WERE NOT REPLACING BEAR HES FINE shaw honey calm down HES NOT GETTING OLD HOW DARE YOU SUGGEST–HE IS MY SON shaw you’re making a scene YOU WOULD MAKE ME TOSS MY OWN SON OUT ON THE STREETS oh my god sameen people are staring please
  • root just wants bear to have a friend!!!
  • shaw is, of course, aggressively projecting
  • and then root tricks her (root you said the blindfold was–wait did you bring me to the aNIMAL SHELTER)
  • and then shaw turns around and root has like seven puppies in her arms and two in her hair
  • and shaw has never been more in love
  • nearly re-proposes on the spot
  • “you look beautiful holding our children”
  • “shut up sameen”
  • “just sayin”
  • listen you cannot joke about kids with root you CANNOT
  • “i don’t know what your deal is, root, puppies are basically like kids”
  • “dogs don’t scream for you at 2am”
  • “puppies whine all night. same thing”
  • “puppies don’t invite all their sticky friends over for birthdays”
  • “if you think we aren’t throwing all these puppies birthday parties you can pack up your things now while i sign the adoption forms”
  • “…i’m divorcing you”
  • “is that a no to the kids or the puppies?”
  • it’s at this point that root stomps out of the shelter all pouty
  • the machine is definitely NOT helping matters by spouting out little statistics about kids
  • not to mention all the future primary assets  and analog interfaces 
  • “we will talk about this when we get home. this is NOT the time and place–”
  • “root? you’re uh. actually upset. i was just joking around.” shaw lifts a puppy out of her jacket. “this one really seemed to like you”
  • the puppy and root look at each other, equally unimpressed
  • “dogs hate me" 
  • the puppy chooses this moment to start chewing on root’s hair. "look at that. he’s trying to eat me”
  • shaw rolls her eyes. “don’t be dumb, the puppy doesn’t hate you. and neither does bear, regrettably”
  • “i wouldn’t know what to do with a puppy”
  • “it’d be mostly mine, and i’m sure the machine–”
  • “i wouldn’t know what to do with a child either”
  • root won’t meet her eyes and her jaw is tight
  • “is that what’s upsetting you? ‘cause I told you, it was a joke" 
  • root glares at her now
  • "no, sameen, you weren’t. i know you. you were doing the thing where you joke about something serious because talking about things makes you uncomfortable”
  • “……guess we should go home then”
  • root stands and helps shaw up. she tentatively rubs the puppy’s head. he lets out a small hesitant brap. root cracks a grin. “we can get this one today, at least”
  • “we’re not naming him biff, root”
  • “what about–”
  • “or zip”
  • “but he’s so smol!“
  • "the memespeak has got to end, i swear to god”
  • root sighs and they walk back in and finish completing the paperwork. 
  • the drive home is a little awkward but occasionally filled by nervous puppy barks. shaw always turns to comfort the puppy
  • even when she’s supposed to be driving
  • “sam the rOAD”
  • “it’s fine, i’ve got it”
  • “fine, fine. don’t be such a baby”
  • root looks at her pointedly. shaw slumps down in her seat, appropriately chastised

I… oh my god. 

Okay putting aside Syaoran sudden surprise perfect vertical splits kick (SERIOUSLY, DAMN) Enjolras is again making a very good point here and his logic is actually very sound. It COULD be Sakura who is taking all the children, for all he knows. Her only alibi has just been torn to shreds because Kyle is a terrible person and has no idea what he’s doing. 

But of course his mistake is actually in the overtly aggressive actions that follow the accusation. Which, again, KIND OF JUSTIFIED, because missing children, but Syaoran ain’t having none of that shit. Sakura is missing and no-one is going to point a gun in his face and talk smack about her like that. BAD MOVE, ENJOLRAS. BAD MOVE. 

(Okay but now go back to admiring Syaoran’s sudden surprise perfect vertical splits kick because seriously? Syaoran you can legit just do anything when it comes to saving Sakura, can’t you?)


That’s all I need. 

Thank you chapter. Nothing else needs to happen. It could end right on this page and I would be completely happy with this decision BECAUSE KUROGANE DID THE THING. 

He is a beast. And look at that face. That face is terrifying.

Why does this make me love him even more. 


“Are you sure you’re okay with this?” Your friend asks you for the billionth time.
“Oh my god! No! I’ve suddenly decided that watching your child for a couple of hours is too much work!” You fall on the couch dramatically.
“I just want to make sure you don’t feel obligated to do this because I’m your friend.”
“Do you have someone else in mind?”
“Well. No.”
“Then shut up and go have a good time!” You get off the couch and lead her towards the door, “Your daughter is 3. How much work can this be?”
“You say that now.” She walks a couple steps out the door and turns to you, “You know my number, please use it. Also, no boys allowed.” She winks at you.

As soon as she’s gone you call Dan; you’d been waiting to call him all night. Last night had been the best night of your life, when he finally told his friends you were dating: he just couldn’t keep his hands off of you.
“Hey love.” He answers after 2 rings.
“Hey.” You try not to sound like your beaming into the phone, “Are you doing anything tonight?”
“Not to my knowledge. Why? What do you have in mind?”
“Meet me at Liz’s house, okay?”
“Do I get any context?”
He shows up about half an hour later, he’s wearing the shirt you bought him when you went to the fair the other day.
“You look cute. I like your shirt.”
“Thanks, my girlfriend picked it out for me.” He leans into the house and plants a kiss on your lips.
He looks at you confused, “Is someone here?”
You open the door so he can see the little girl standing to your left. “This is Summer, Liz’s daughter”
“You’re babysitting?” He laughs, “Well this whole night just got a cliche teen movie vibe.”
“Or a slasher film vibe.” You say, causing him to laugh even harder.
You can’t keep him away from her, they’ve been playing with Barbies for about two hours. You lean into her bedroom, watching him, how he is with her. It makes you fall in love with him even more.
“Hey Summer, are you hungry? There’s a hot bowl of mac and cheese out there that’s calling your name!”
She runs to the kitchen and sits in her seat, as you’re pouring her a glass of milk, Dan wraps his arms around you from behind.
“Hey there.”
“Can we have one some day.”
You turn around to face him, “A kid?”
“No, a Barbie dream house.” He says to you sarcastically.
You’re saved by Summer, “where my milk?”
“Right here.” You give it to her then lead Dan into the living room, “Are you being serious?”
“Absolutely. I want kids. Don’t you?”
“Well yeah, but we’ve only been dating for two months, Dan. You just told your friends about me last night.”
“I know, I’m just- I’m just in love with you, I think.”
“You think?”
“Well I’ve never really been in love before, but I think that this is how it’s supposed to feel.” He caresses your cheek lightly, enough to send chills down your spine.
You stare into his eyes for a few moments, then you grab his face and kiss him.
“I think I love you, too.”
Summer’s been asleep for hours, you and Dan sit curled up on the couch watching The Little Mermaid.
“You’re humming again.”
“What? I love this movie, Dan! Is it bothering you?”
“No, I think it’s cute.” He kisses your forehead.
The front door opens and Liz stumbles in.
“Are you drunk?”
“No? Okay, maybe. Yes. A little bit. I am.”
You and Dan both laugh, “Why don’t you get her to b-” he’s interrupted when Liz throws up all over the floor, “Holy shit!”
“You clean that up, I’ll take her to the bathroom.”
When she’s finally done puking out her entire stomach, Liz slumps against her bathroom wall.
“Thank you.”
“No problem.”
“So, you and Dan?”
“For a while now. We kept it secret for a bit.”
“You’re cute together.”
“Do you think I’d be a good mom?”
“Oh my god! Are you pregnant?”
“Fuck no! It’s just that, Dan asked me if I wanted kids, and I just don’t know if I’d even be good at it.”
“My kid is still alive, right?”
“Of course.”
“Then you’re a good parent. Being a mom is about keeping your kids alive and happy and loved. The real trick is finding someone you love enough to have them with.”
“Well that night was eventful.” Dan laughs as he gets into your car. “But Summer is cute, so that makes up for all the crazy.”
“What?” He looks at you with a concerned face.
“The answer is yes.”
“What’re you talking about?”
“Your question. The answer is yes.”
“What que- oh my god.” He opens his mouth to say something else but you stop him by kissing him.
“Listen. The answer, my answer is yes. I want kids, and I want them with you.” He’s smiling. “But only if you promise that we won’t name them after Game of Thrones characters.”
He groans, “Arya is such a badass! Why wouldn’t you want our daughter looking up to someone like that!” You laugh, “What?”
“Our daughter, Arya Howell. I like that.”
He smiles wide and plants a giant kiss on your forehead. “I love you so much.”

Signs As Things I’ve Said While Playing Fallout

Aries: Why the fuck is there a death claw floating in the air *Shoots it and it kills me* IT WAS FUCKING FLOATING HOW

Taurus: Damn I can’t carry anymore. Drugs, I can use drugs to solve my problems.

Gemini: Oh lets see if I can sleep with her. *charisma level isn’t high enough* I just wanted love, you didn’t have to laugh at my attempt to seduce you.

Cancer: *Mutant hound has it’s head stuck in a trash can and is glitching around* Dance like the trash you are.

Leo: Why do you sound french when you look asian.

Virgo: Well mr. mirelurk queen Im gonna fuck you up and then kill all your children. *dies* you can kill my children but for the love of god don’t fuck me.

Libra: We’re gonna have fun, we are gonna build a nice little house for Pip- *Steps on a mine* WHAT THE FUCK I JUST WANTED TO BE A GOOD LESBIAN.

Scorpio: Cait I would love to help you and your drug addiction but I need you shut the fuck up while I go steal some drugs. 

Sagittarius: Oh my god is that a bobble head. *begins walking to it* You can head my bobble if you get what im saying. *Laughs for ten minutes*

Capricorn: *Is singing along to diamond city radio* Did- Did one of the songs just say the word gay? Damn I knew Travis was gay.

Aquarius: Why the fuck is the ground moving over there, *walks over to it* It’s a ghoul, also known as a human raisen.

Pisces: Why am I hooking up with multiple people at the same time. She must be ultra gay.

made by ~Libra~

                      “I’m doing my job KID, so if you don’t

                                 want to be killed, do what I say

Oh God, why he had to end up protecting irespectful children? gun’s cannon facing up to the air as he moved slowly but secure throught the area. A single noise and the lickers would ending up finding them. A signal was given to the young female to keep her voice down. Trying to ignore the OLD MAN nickname that this girl gave to the agent. 

Sure he was growing grey, but for a forty years old like himself… he still was in shape.

@karismatickitty   cont from X

ok but imagine Percy and Annabeth’s daughter has depression, and she decides that she wants to kill herself by jumping off a bridge (i.e., drowning) because she’s always had a connection to the water for some strange reason and so as she stands on the edge, she whispers that she loves her family but she can’t bear to stay alive any longer and Jason/his children hear it somehow and rush to Percy to tell him, and after they get there they find her washed up on shore, clothes torn and ragged, black hair in knots, and he just collapses because oh my god my daughter tried to commit suicide and he just thanks Poseidon over and over for letting her live

One thing that I will never get over and just absolutely grinds my gears is that some customers have no sense of responsibility and like to blame other people for their being late to appointments, just like they tell their children not to.
Were slammin bammin busy, and this lady goes “oh my god, I have a 20 minute drive and I have 7 minutes to get there can you just hurry up?????” And when she gets her drinks she just sighs “finally” and stomps away shaking her head. You have no idea how badly I wanted to say “sounds like a personal problem.” I kind of hoped she would trip and spill her drinks all over herself.

Also, why are middle aged white women always such assholes? Like, I get it, you drive an Audi SUV, you have to pick your kids up from their private charter school and take them to their piano lessons and soccer practice so you can go take care of your stupid little handbag dog and whine about how you only have 23 pairs of shoes in your closet and your stupid husband doesn’t make enough money. I get it. Would it kill you to not act like such an entitled, whiny, self-absorbed 3-year old?

Tl;dr I hate wealthy middle aged white women and the next time I’m in a place where there’s someone giving a customer service person a mouthful (as longas the customer is being a little bitch), I’m going to say something fa long the lines of “would you like some cheese with your whine, princess? How about a nice tall glass of Nobody Cares? I hear the bitterness and acidity pairs well with rich middle aged whiny white women. :)))))))”

  • what she says: I'm fine
  • what she means: fire emblem fates doesn't come out till next year. It's June. JUNE. There are already people streaming the game in Asia. Even though there's one more day till the official release? tHERE ARE SPoilers EVERYWHERE. Million of characters we didn't see before suddenly get fanarts. People don't tag their spoilers. I already want to touch my siblings. oH MY GOD. I can mARRY >THOSE PEOPLE<???? WAIT. WHERE DO THE CHILDREN COME FROM? Why does this girl look like Tharja? Wait. What do you mean it's not her girlfriend bUT HER DAD? NO. IM GONNA BLACKLIST EVERYTHING. Shit. I can't see harmless fanart now. Is it safe to take a look anyway? Yeah. Oh good that's some neat piece of art. Another one, and one more. FUCK THIS IS A GIFSET OF A FULL CUTSCENE. No one reblogs my fanart anymore. 6 MONTHS. 6 months till 2016. I can't sleep. how is NoA gonna handle censorship? How am I supposed to avoid the spoilers? How do I dodge them? soMEONE SHOW ME THE PATH I SHOULD TAKE,
shamy feels.

 It should not be a big deal anymore for me to hear Sheldon say “I miss you as well”. 

I MEAN, FOR HEAVEN’S SAKE, He already said he loves her, wants to marry her, have children with her, and finally offered himself for her birthday to let her know how important she is to him. 


Plus, what struck me the most is how beautiful she looked. I  mean, she look just the same as always. Straight hair, glasses, cardigan. It amazes me how different she can look without changing her appearance. SHE JUST GLOWS. Her eyes, her smile….. *sighs* 

Originally posted by vorlonoakleypotter


Okey dokey, I am working on the prompts you guys sent me but this meta was also in my head and I wanted to share.

I was looking at these particular chapters again because it’s like the one time my children are happy and married and hnnngh

But what really gets me is I noticed a pattern in which Syaoran initiates or engages in physical affection. Whenever he hugs her or she hugs him he immediately goes to nuzzle her hair and head, which is so frikkin cute you guys.

Does this mean he did this when he wasn’t that much taller than her??? DOES THIS MEAN HE DEVELOPED A HABIT OF JUST NUZZLING HER IN GENERAL??? OH MY GOD MY HEART!

“Oh my gods...”

Amphitrite was lying on one of the beds in the infirmary, watching one of Apollo’s children do the ultrasound for the baby. Despite already knowing Ivy-Marie’s gender thanks to the miraculous event that had occurred, she wanted to see the ultrasound. She wanted to see her Sea Bean as a baby. So witnessing this filled her heart with happiness. She just… She just wished that Andy was able to witness it too. Hell, or even Poseidon. She has not heard a single word from him ever since she gave back the ring and ask a camper to give him her letter. It killed her, not having one of those two there. Yet, she’s making it work a little bit. She’s going to need to, since she has decided for Ivy to grow up in camp.

“Ivy-Marie Seraphina Jackson… My little Sea Bean.”

I hate when, in conversations about pregnancy/abortion etc, a man interjects with “I’d never do that if I was in that situation” like dude…you’ll NEVER BE in that situation. It’s nice that for you this is 100% hypothetical but maybe shut up.

Like the other day my cousin was talking about a woman she knew who didn’t know she was pregnant and when she had the baby she adopted it out bc she had never wanted children and was also struggling w mental illness and wasn’t ready for a child she didn’t know she had, and my uncle was like “oh my GOD she adopted it out?! How could she just discard her child?!” and I was like ?? She adopted it out to a family who wanted it (who apparently she knew). she didn’t exactly “discard” it. And then he was like “if that were ME in that situation…” honestly just shut the hell up.

Thoughts on Battle Royale

Nothing on this show goes the way I want it too lol
I died when Ramona was getting thrown around
That sex scene with Sally turned so messed up
The scene with the countess and her children was sad
Again, Miss Evers is such a gem I love her
Finally a scene with Sarah and Gaga
So now we know vampires can live on at the Cortez
Ramona glowed the fuck up she’s fierce lol
James why the did you do that :(
Oh my god lol John is a savage