i-love-this-so-much-it-hurts

In honour of Rubeus Hagrid’s birthday

I don’t even know where to start.

  • Hagrid is one of the people Dumbledore trusts the most and I think that says so much about him
  • He defends everyone who deserves it
  • people rarely saw him angry but his wrath is a force to be reckoned with
  • He is naive to a fault
  • He is incredibly loyal to those who he trust
  • he loves blindly and completely
  • that’s why he brought his giant brother to the Forbidden Forest, his heart didn’t let him leave Grawp there where he would get hurt
  • so he made the decision that would most definitely get him expelled or sent to Azkaban if someone figured out
  • because he loved so much
  • I know people assume him to be a Gryffindor but I think he might be a Slytherpuff
  • He’s always misunderstood and bullied because he is half-giant but he doesn’t let that get under his thick skin
  • when you think about Madame Maxime’s response to him calling her giant descendant, I would even say Hagrid is proud of what he is
  • He loves Fantastic Beasts because he believes they are just as misunderstood as he is
  • he wanted others to see them as he did, that’s why he was a little too enthusiastic in his classes
  • Tom Riddle got Hagrid expelled for something he didn’t do but he didn’t become bitter about it
  • can you imagine how he must have felt when people didn’t even listen to his defence?
  • His heart maybe the same size he is if not bigger
  • Hagrid is the person who pulled Harry out of the house after Voldemort’s attack
  • He was the one who took Harry away from the Dursleys, once to take to Hogwarts and once before the war 
  • Hagrid knew Harry was alone so he instantly befriended him
  • He made him his first birthday cake
  • He bought him his first proper birthday present
  • He came completely out of the blue and became a very important father figure and friend in Harry’s life
  • Hagrid was one of the first people Harry ever trusted
  • I must protect little Harry Potter at all costs
  • and protect he did until Harry didn’t want to be protected anymore
  • He was the person who carried his lifeless body out of the Forest
  • He would have given anything to die instead of him
  • The small baby he cradled in his arms as Lily Evans lied on the floor lifeless and Sirius Black fought him to him
  • The small boy in baggy second hand clothes who didn’t believe he could be important
  • The not-so-small boy who widely grinned at him anytime he saw him with his green eyes shining
  • The brave man who welcomed death like an old friend to save others
  • Hagrid watched with his hands tied as Harry Potter died right in front of his eyes
  • and they made him carry his limp body and he walked as he felt light as a feather in his arms
  • Hagrid is strong
  • not only in the physical sense but in the emotional sense
  • that man went to Azkaban for Merlin’s sake
  • if he wasn’t strong enough he would have never been the same
  • he was always there for the Golden Trio
  • whether they were sad, happy or just curious
  • his methods may not be conventional but he always tried to help people
  • because that’s just who he is
  • a kind and loving ball of fluff with a heart the size of a Ukranian Ironbelly 
  • Happy birthday Hagrid, I’m so happy Harry met you

What breaks me is that she said “I love you” like she was saying “goodbye my love, it’s gonna be alright”. And that HURTS.

Like they’re both in that moment trying to reassure the other that it’s gonna be okay and they love each other so much and I cry.

Tamlin and Redemption Arcs

I apologize in advance if this gets a little confusing, my thoughts are whirling so much I honestly cannot coherently say what I want to say. Discussions of abuse hit close to home, and it hurts me to see so many people treating it as less dangerous than it is. Please bear with me.

I fell in love with “A Court of Mist and Fury” as soon as I read it. Here was a story about a girl who was me. I cried my heart out when Tamlin trapped her in that house. Sarah J Maas did a flawless job of describing that feeling of terror. Feyre was curled up in a ball and every word I read physically hurt me. It was spot on.She was pulled out of that situation, and she slowly came to realize she was being abused. She became healthier the longer she was away from Tamlin. ACOMAF is an empowering story that shows the path of an abused, traumatized girl as she realized she was being abused and began to heal.

Let me take a second to talk about my own life. My father is emotionally abusive and manipulative. He has been my whole life. I did not, until about a year ago, have enough courage to even accept that abusive was the right word to describe him. I still flinch when those around me remind me that he is abusive. After 18 years of putting up with mistreatment I know that the word to describe him is abuser, but I still hesitate to use it. Because one day he will be yelling at me, and I will be shaking and crying so hard I can’t talk, and he will begin to yell at me more because I am just “crying to get out of having this discussion”. Afterwards, I won’t remember what we were talking about, just the terror I felt. The next day, though, he might tell me how proud he is of me, that I am smarter than he ever could have predicted, and that I can do anything I want to in life.

The reason I describe my personal experiences is to demonstrate how messy abuse is. It is hard to recognize and so much harder to remove yourself from the situation. Sometimes it isn’t possible to cut off your abuser. Okay I swear I’m done talking about my own life now.

This post actually concerns the possibility of a Tamlin redemption arc. I was originally going to write this as a comment on a post, but I did not want to be overly rude and put my two cents in where they aren’t wanted. I will reblog the post I’m referring to before I post this for anyone who wants to know what caused me to finally write this. Keep in mind though that this is not the first time I’ve had these thoughts or seen posts that send me into a similar fury.

Tamlin is an abuser. I figured I would start with a statement most all of us agree on. His actions are not excusable. They are not mistakes, either. No matter how traumatized someone is, it does not give them leave to abuse others.

The tricky thing concerning Tamlin’s redemption arc is that as far as I can tell, it usually involves Tamlin doing something grand and heroic out of his love for Feyre and his guilt for hurting her, and being forgiven, or at least acknowledged for his grand gesture. It seems like a happily ever after. Feysand live happily together, Tamlin can be forgiven by the audience, and everyone feels less bad about liking Tamlin in the first book.

In truth, a redemption arc can be incredibly dangerous. It would set some precedents I’m not comfortable with. For one, it would put pressure on abused persons to forgive their abuser. That is something that could potentially be very dangerous for anyone in an abusive situation. As I said before, abuse is messy, and it is so hard to tell when you are in an abusive situation. Once you figure it out, you can continue to constantly forgive your abuser, and it might not sink in that your abuser is truly abusive. That is what I described above regarding my own personal situation. I constantly use my father’s insecurities to forgive his behavior towards me. When I catch that I am forgiving him, I have to stop and remind myself that his repeated actions do not need to be forgiven. The pressure to forgive already exists, and a narrative where someone forgives their abusers just reinforces that pressure.

Secondly, it reinforces the idea that love makes it all okay. A redemption arc, even when it does not end in Feyre forgiving Tamlin, reminds readers that Tamlin really does love her. That leads to the conclusion that he is in the end a “good guy” because he loves Feyre. Just imagine it. Because he loves her, he realizes how awful he was and changes his ways. He comes over to the “good” side and stops hurting people. All in the name of love, the same thing he used to cover up his abuse in the first place. Everything is okay now. He turned himself around because he loved her so much. That kind of “love fixes everything” view is what blinded Feyre from Tamlin’s abuse in the first place.

Finally, it lets Tamlin off the hook. He abused someone, plain and clear, but then he makes it up to her and eases his own guilt. It sets the precedent that abuse is just another mistake that can be forgiven through a grand enough gesture. Like I said before, abuse is not a mistake. When it is classified as a mistake, the abuser is considerably less responsible for their actions.

A redemption arc for Tamlin perpetuates ideas that are harmful to the abused. I understand the reasons behind Tamlin’s actions, but I do not think those reasons should affect our judgement of his actions. What he did to Feyre is inexcusable, as is all abuse.

To be clear, I’m not trying to attack anyone who thinks that we should understand Tamlin’s actions, or those who have sympathy for him. He was also in a traumatic situation, and I understand feeling for someone who has been through hell. I do not understand being sympathetic to someone’s abusive actions, no matter how linked to trauma they are.

So yeah. These are my many thoughts about Tamlin and redemption arcs for abusers. Thanks for bearing with my impassioned rambling.

anonymous asked:

Who are your fave blogs on here and why? Like for each one what makes them great for you?

Oh dear

I love @sashapique @football-s @barcelonaesmuchomas @barca-penguins @4fabregastasticxavi6 because these people are simply amazing okay? Brilliant even with their edits and updates and literally all you need. Need some new info? Boom check these blogs and you’ll get it. 10/10

Then there are my friends (I guess bc like if some of you don’t consider me as your friend or smth it’s fine but ily all lmao) like @siemprecristiano @alexisnchez @k7ngdom @luchorgasm @melissajimenez @monetmarjr @chasing-neymessi @sergioraaamos (if I forgot someone sue me) and well they’re great, great wonderful people that everyone should talk to.

Then there are writers like @messifangirl @deledier @theaccidentalchampion (and like four other people but idk if you guys want to be mentioned and all) and I love these people so much my heart hurts okay? Every time they update I literally stay on the damn floor for like an hour bc wow

And then there are people I sometimes talk to or bother them weirdly but I love seeing them on my dash and they make me happy like I love them ok @riyadmahrz @princesa-rafinha @lionelandremessi @yalla-madrid @princesasophie @neymares @myheartis-blaugrana @leocuccittini @rafaeloangelo @ariel868 @haillionel @happyxavi @gerardpiqashian
@daddymessiii @bartrahoe @quepasamarcandre @umtitties @itsneymars @alexchambos @aftgomes21 @draxlerr @jordiabla @joannaboonjr @xaviniestah @xavimascheranos @neymarslionel

@fatherpique @inmybubble

Like I forgot so many people but ily all and idk if I even answered the damn question but hey!

Also if we do talk and I didn’t include you like come after me and punch me so I could hug you afterwards BC otherwise yeah :/

i just got off work and i’m literally overwhelmed by the amount of kind messages i have in my inbox, + i went through the tags on my blackout photos and i had to sit down because i started to cry!! everyone is being so sweet and saying such nice things

not to be corny but when i was young i had horrendous self esteem that only worsened after being in an abusive relationship. during that period of my life it felt like the only things that “stuck” with me were the negative things people said about me, so i literally had to train myself to shut that out and value my opinion over everybody else’s to avoid being hurt. i love myself very much and i value myself because that’s what i’ve fought for, but i got so used to only hearing praise coming from myself during all those years where i felt alone that it’s overwhelming to hear a flood of compliments coming from people who have never met me before. in a good way of course!! i wish i could put into words how much it means to me. i was so used to only hearing those kinds of things coming from myself because i shut everyone out for so long.

i got some shitty messages today but i just want you guys to know that if you’ve been kind to me, even if it’s the smallest comment, that has so much more of an impact on me than any of the negativity!! thank you guys so much!! i never expected i’d have this much support especially since at this time last year i was having a really hard time with things and i felt really alone. this year sucked bootyass but i feel like i’m in a healthier place than i was then and plenty of it has to do with the fact that so many of you are so supportive of me. thank you so much if you’ve been kind!! i love you guys!!

The truth about a long distance relationship

They aren’t all cute airport meetings and the cute photos in between, they are so much more.
Tears become a daily routine and missing them hurts more and more. Being long distance will test you in every way possible and believe me, it does but it should never test your love for one another.
Having them around makes you feel as though nothing else matters, everything is okay and you could stay so content like that forever…but all of that is always short lived because that is distance for you, distance is a living hell and it is something that requires so much strength, communication and most of all Love.
Please do not give up, because all of those tears are worth it in the end.

10

Okay, you guys see this man, right? This remarkable, extraordinary, one of a kind man, right? Well, his name is David Tennant and he’s an actor a brilliant actor. And this is a friendly reminder that this man is not the characters he plays. Who he plays on screen is his profession and nothing more. He isn’t Kilgrave for example; he doesn’t have a mean bone in his body, and he wouldn’t hurt anyone or anything or purpose. One he’s exceptionally kind to his fans which can’t be said about a lot of famous people out there. And he is downright humble and sincere to all those he works with and then some. So, there is a reason why I as a fan love him so much because he isn’t some pompous, rude, thinks he higher than thou celebrity twat; he’s everything opposite of that and then some.

anonymous asked:

saeran i went to a suicide prevention thing my school had today and i havent stopped crying??? my chest hurts i never thought anyone cared but they do and idk why im sharing this with you but??? you're loved!!! you're loved and you're wanted and im sorry that you've been through so much shit because you deserve the fucking world ok????

…Thank you.

lovephantomsnow  asked:

Will Lucid develop some kind of feelings for Goth or is he going to threaten him not to hurt his step bro? I don't really know much about Lucid (SORRY!) P.s I love your work! ^///^

haha i dunno how to answet that x’D all i can say is gothmay have a hard time comin out of his shell(he do that to everybody tho lol) more than normal, so maybe he need more time to get to kno lucid better xD

as for lucid? u gotta ask shibe for that xD

anonymous asked:

Ok but the scene when Maui talks about his parents abandoning him I don't know how I was able to stop my self from drowning the entire theatre!!! IT'S OK MY CINNAMON ROLL I LOVE YOU!!!!!!

SAME

I’M ACTUALLY NOT GONNA LIE THE SECOND TIME AROUND SEEING IT WHEN HE AND MOANA WERE TALKING ABOUT HOW HE STOLE THE HEART OF TE FITI  SO HE COULD BE LOVED AND ACCEPTED BY HUMANITY AND HE GIVES THIS SAD PUPPY LOOK AND GOES 

“it wasn’t enough. nothing was ever enough” 

I ACTUALLY REACHED OUT MY HANDS AT THE SCREEN AND SAID

“nooOOO DON’T SAY THAT I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH” OUT LOUD CAUSE IT HURT

anonymous asked:

Ahhh thank you so much for the poly midotaka!! I loved it so much omg. Could I ask for another poly midotaka calming their s/o down that's having an anxiety attack (like crying, can't breath, can't talk)? Like maybe from a storm or something? Tysm your my favorite imagines blog!!!!

A heartbeat, heavy, loud, erratic; that’s all you could hear in this moment in time. It pounded against your ear drums, demanding attention as it battled its way to the forefront of your senses. It was fast, fast, fast, too fast against your rib cage, making your bones hurt, making your chest hurt, making everything in you hurt.

Your lungs burned, lack of oxygen in them searing the muscle. Opening your mouth, you tried to gulp down air. Swallow it down, breath it in, anything to fill your deflating body but with each breath it was never enough. You needed more, more, more, but where was the oxygen? Where was the air? You couldn’t find it, couldn’t breath it in, couldn’t—

Your senses are shocked when you feel hands grab onto yours. They’re warm and comforting in contrast to your cold and clammy ones. Your fingers are numb, but you squeeze the hands trapping yours in an embrace, not knowing whether you were squeezing too hard or not hard enough.

It takes your eyes a while to focus, blinking past the tears that were accumulating, before you’re finally able to see the face in front of you. Takao is staring at you, brows furrowed with worry and mouth moving nonstop. You know he’s saying something, know he’s trying to talk to you, calm you down, bring you back from the dark place you’re in, but you can’t hear anything past the beat of your own heart.

For a second Takao glances somewhere else and, just based on his posture and the way his mouth moves, you know he’s yelling, calling for Midorima. What should he do? What could he do? Was there anything?

The next time his eyes meet yours, you know he’s trying again to calm you down. One of his hands leaves yours and he starts gesturing. Your frantic mind and racing heart make it hard to decipher, but eventually you understand. In. Out. In. Out. He’s instructing you how to breath. In. Out. In. Out. Slow even breaths at regular intervals. In. Out. In.

Slowly, as your heartbeat slows and your mind strays from thoughts of panic, you start to hear again.

“…that’s it, like that,” Takao soothes and you realize his voice isn’t as loud as you initially thought it was. “Breathe just like that. In and out, slow and steady. Man, you’re so cold right now…” Then, over your shoulder he says, “Hey, you got them yet or what?”

“Right here.”

Midorima’s voice is followed by a heavy weight on your shoulders and suddenly you’re enveloped in warmth. He’s placed a blanket, fresh out of the dryer and smelling faintly of flowers, around your shoulders. He makes quick work to wrap it fully around you, leaving no inch uncovered.

The couch dips as Midorima moves to sit beside you. His movements are slow, hands gentle as they caress the side of your face, a thumb swiping at the stray tears that streaked your skin. Gently, you feel hands squeeze at yours once again and you know Takao is still there, sitting just in front of you as he anchors you in place.

It’s a slow process, your erratic heartbeat and shallow breathing and rapid blinking slowly coming to an equilibrium, and though neither boy is sure they’re doing the right thing to help, you feel yourself calming knowing that both of the would be there for you.

anonymous asked:

I FEEL you on BTS. I thought 7 was too many members to possibly be able to love them all so much. Like I started out with no bias, then gained 1, then started watching the Bombs and variety appearances, next thing I know I'm in love with all of them and I will fite anyone who tries to hurt them. OT7 indeed.

That’s where everyone messes up - if you want just one bias, don’t watch the bombs. Remain in ignorant bliss. Ignore every variety appearance. And definitely don’t read any interviews in which they’re asked to praise one another.

I think that’s one of the reasons I love them all so much - they very clearly love one another way more than any of us can love them. In some groups there isn’t really a brotherly camaraderie. You get the sense that they don’t necessarily all get along in every one-on-one selection. But with Bangtan, you can pick any two members - seriously! any two! - and find all sorts of moments between said members.

Their relationships with one another are so solid and it radiates out into their public group dynamics. It’s great. They’re genuinely a happy little found family and it makes me weirdly emotional. I’m glad that they found each other and I feel like they’re going to be a solid unit for…basically forever tbh.

I was going to throw in a bomb of all of them together but then I remembered this bomb exists so I’m sharing this one instead.

Seriously Thank you.

The user that has been stealing my work, their account is gone. I’m still hurt that someone would do this but I will be starting to write again tomorrow.

A big shout out to the people who have shared and stuck up for me, your reports to the tumblr profile and your concerns and help were really appreciative and amazing. I love you all for that and made me feel so much better having people on my side.
@goddess-of-leo, @teresa-yukibito, @voltagelover27, @thexgoddessxofxfate, @strawberrymintkisses, @carinecaldre69, @tsukkiyume, @lone-wolf155, @voltagekpoplover, @ai-shi-te, @dr3ad-m0on, @fleetingbutterflydreams, @robynhood4ever @cristy–love
You guys have seriously been angels and amazing people ever for helping me through it by sharing the post and talking to me. Its really helped. I cant wait to start writing and posting things again. I could not thank you enough!

anonymous asked:

I'm obsessed with love but i wish i wasn't. actually it bothers me more that i want to be loved so much. i ignore it because logically- wanting love this much is stupid,but unconciously it ruins my days. i act as if i don't care about it, but hurts my soul inside.

the idea of love and experiencing love in whatever form is so different and dont confuse the concept with reality the love u see in media is very stylised and unrealistic so be careful

What Is Love?

Akaashi: A human emotion that I am void of feeling *poker face and crossed arms*

Bokuto: WHAT I FEEL FOR AKAASHIII! *does victory pose*

Sugawara: A warm feeling. You get a tingle in your veins and it takes you on a journey that you never knew you would be able to experience, no matter how much you imagine it. *low-key dreamy eyes glancing at Oikawa*

Oikawa: SuGa DoN’T hUrT mE DoN’t HuRt Me No MoRe! *dances dramatically in front of Sugawara*

Akaashi: ….. *facepalms and drags Bokuto away from Oikawa’s  “bad influence”*

Bokuto: *high fives Oikawa and is dragged away*

Sugawara: *blushes and facepalms* * gently smacks Oikawa’s head*

Oikawa: *fake whimpers and grabs Sugawara’s wrist lightly, smirking slightly* I see how much I’m loved…

Sugawara: *smiles warmly and touches his face gently* Yes, you are loved. Very much so.

Sugawara and Oikawa: *make out and don’t look disgusting*

Bokuto: *grabs Akaashi’s hand and laces their fingers*

Akaashi: *smiles lightly*

Bokuto: *lovingly smiles toward Akaashi*

Akaashi: *kisses Bokuto’s cheek lightly*

Bokuto: *freaks out cheers*

haikyuuislifeu  asked:

HEY HEY HEYYYY amazin artist! *throws flowers* First of all,YOU ARE a very talented and great artist and I aspire to be like you and every amazin Tumblr artists here! And no-I am not gonna ask this as anon cuz well I want you to know that I exist and I'm supporting every one of you. Whatever people's judgements? Yeah, fruck that ❤⃛ヾ(๑❛ ▿ ◠๑ ) we respect those shippers so those peeps please respect great artist like this one RIGHT HERE! If you ever hurt these peeps, FIGHT MEH |ω・`)

Love Hurts

Originally posted by edngyma

Request -  Would you do a Riddler X Reader where the reader gets in a pretty gory fight, for him. And when they come home all battered and bruised and smiles saying, “Heh, god I really must love you” then falling? :D Love your stuff btw!!!

Pairing - Edward Nygma X Reader 

Word Count - 2,034

Warnings - Torture, violence, blood etc, 

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Nat and that bridge. Elise and her epic love affair with walls. They enjoy hurting us clearly. Lmao, seriously though when those add on thingies are out I'm buying and gifting. I don't even care what they are at this point. I just miss Carmilla content so much

They appreciate the arts anon LMAO.   Look, I don’t care if Natasha and Elise are literally man spreading on a couch looking like Christmas gremlins and had H*H level atrocious makeup, I’m going to buy what ever the fuck is in there.  

But if Elise’s picture is an indication of what the bundle is going to look like, I might actually consider framing them and displaying them in my family living room.