i-laugh-to-keep-from-crying

story time

I may have mentioned this before but

The most badass I have ever been in my life was in fourth grade, when one day, my crush and I were waiting for the school bus, joking around and roughhousing like we liked to do, and I, somehow, LORD KNOWS HOW because I am a WEAKLING, managed to do that thing where you twist a person’s arm behind their back so they can’t move.

He said, “I’ve never known anyone who could do that before.”

I said, “Now you do.”

I have never been that cool since then, and I don’t think I will be ever again.

Sealed

Author’s Note: This Shannon Leto imagine was requested by @meghan12151977 . It is a pic inspired fic about a woman from Shannon’s past seeing him again and not knowing what words to say. Who needs words when actions say it louder. I hope you enjoy. XOXO

Trigger Warning: Smut, Profanity


I was strolling through my feed on Instagram when I saw him. His eyes soft and unexpected. I wondered who took the photo and was it the woman that replaced me. I missed him deeply. It had been months since we had talked. I wouldn’t know what to say if he even called. I ran my thumb over his cheek, whispering I loved him as I closed my eyes. The large red heart coming across the screen brought me back to reality.

“Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit,” I fumbled my phone before dropping it on its face. “SHIT!”

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This kid I absolutely love told me he’s leaving, moving to another state, and today is his last day. 

Which sucks. I don’t want to see him go. he’s such a great kid. He also really loves me as a teacher (I think because he’s also LGBT and he naturally gravitated toward me as someone who is unashamed of their identity), and he came up and gave me a big hug and said, “I’m gonna miss you, Ms. Aguilar.”

“I’m gonna miss you too. And I’m sure you will find another teacher that loves you just as much as me.”

At that, he scoffed. “Bullshit,” he said, and I had to laugh to keep myself from crying. 

We get so many kids into our lives and we let them into our hearts. I love all of my kids, even the difficult ones, but this kid is someone special. I hate to say the word “favorite,” because I try not to play favorites, but he’s definitely up there. I will truly miss having him around to add color to my day, and I will look fondly on the Pennywise drawing he gave me (which I hung up on my bulletin board) and remember such a loving kid who was mine for only a few months. 

Okay, now I’m gonna cry. 

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Tell All My Friends I’m Dead
[ they say you need to pray if you wanna go to heaven; they don’t tell you what to say when your whole life has gone to hell ]
- noah czerny’s mix for his last day alive (and beyond) -

dead on arrival - fall out boy // there’s no ‘i’ in team - taking back sunday // seventy times 7 - brand new // it ends tonight - the all-american rejects // smooth criminal - alien ant farm // dead! - my chemical romance // forget my name - new found glory // at your funeral - saves the day // adam’s song - blink-182 // famous last words - my chemical romance

[ listen here ]