i-have-so-much-to-learn

anonymous asked:

How would you refute someone who trivialises Kaneki's development during the Aogiri arc (i.e. his transition from Kuroneki to Shironeki) as Kaneki goes from a 'wimp to a badass'?

Oh man, that classic argument.

First and foremost, Kaneki prior to his torture wasn’t a wimp. He might have viewed himself as weak, but then again Kaneki is probably his own worst critic.

Kaneki had only been a Ghoul for about two months when Aogiri took him. e started out as an absolutely ordinary college student, a normal kid that had never so much as tried to punch anyone. He was also a victim of abuse, having learned and internalized all kinds of unhealthy ideas about himself.

His hesitance to fight and give into violence makes even MORE SENSE now that we know his mother was physically abusive to him. Many victims of childhood abuse are fearful of becoming just like their abusers. This is another way in which the Black Goat’s Egg reflects Kaneki’s life – he lived in fear of becoming violent and abusive just like his mother. So he was even more hesitant to use violence, and feared both his power and how good giving into his instincts felt.

But even so, Kaneki was still pretty strong even before his torture. He learned to break arms through reading a book, broke Amon’s Quinque and beat him to a stand-still, and got in some decent hits against Tsukiyama. (Tsukiyama is compared to a World-class Boxer by another Ghoul, to explain his level of strength.)

During the escape attempt, Kaneki faces the S-Rated Bin Brothers alone. He manages to beat one of them in a one-on-one fight, through RIPPING A LAMP POST out of the ground and using it to beat the guy upside the head. Kaneki was strong even then, simply not on the same level as Yamori. That doesn’t make him a wimp, it just means that he hadn’t managed to hit the Big Times until the torture gave him a boost.

As we’ve learned in :Re, injury actually makes Ghouls stronger because it causes the RC pathways to spread through the body. So Kaneki’s torture gave him a huge boost, and then he further boosted it through eating Yamori’s flesh. In terms of his mental state, he reaches a point where he embraces the very things he feared before. While on the surface, it SEEMS like a positive change……the narrative proves to us that it ultimately wasn’t a good thing.

Kaneki went overboard, throwing away his support and trying to become as much of a monster as his enemies. He was an emotional wreck, sacrificing his sanity and his morals in a reckless pursuit of strength. And it ended up destroying him, while he was unable to save anyone that he cared about.

Neither state was necessarily a good thing. Kaneki simply traded one unhealthy attitude and coping mechanism for another. He went from living in fear of becoming a monster, to basically trying to force himself to be one as much as possible. And he ultimately realized it was entirely out of selfishness and fear, rather than to protect the people he loved.

Now, we’re seeing him repeating that pattern. He’s gone from being afraid, to kind of accepting things, to embracing cruelty and throwing away his humanity. These aren’t good things, and it certainly isn’t going from “wimp to badass”. It’s just going from one kind of damaged state to another.

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these are probably 2 of the only selfies i have ever taken w/o any makeup on. i don’t expect reblogs or likes on this.

i’m posting these because lately i have been feeling so low about myself w/o makeup or filters … i have been feeling self conscious and gross about myself and it kills me.

everyone has their own definition of beauty, and i hope some day i’ll learn to love myself w/o beauty products and still feel just as beautiful as i do with them.

Truth: I have so much love and respect for girls and guys who shamelessly post selfies of themselves. I want to have that level of confidence where I’m just like, ‘looking fierce, selfie time’ but instead I’m me who hides every time a group photo is taken and cringes every time I post a rare selfie and deletes it five minutes later out of embarrassment for myself. 

One of these days I’ll learn to love my appearance or whatever and I’ll take a billion selfies but for now I’ll just be liking everyone else’s. 

So I’ve had a weird Dance Experience...

Before I begin, I am new to tumblr, I see a lot of discussion on here with Irish dancers across the world, and since dance occupies 70% of my life, I wanted to join. I have also always wanted to blog…so I am going to try this out. 

My name is Megan and I will be 25 in April. I don’t know how or when I was exposed to Irish dance, but I remember in second grade telling the kids in class I could “Irish Dance” and I started moving my legs and being a brat (I was good at that). So I suppose it wasn’t much of a surprise after moving back to the states in 2003 that I chose to start learning Irish Dance as my sport of choice. (it was dance or horse back riding!)

I was 12 when I took my first classes in Raleigh North Carolina, early January 2004. I immediately loved the art, the sport, the dance. It is the only sport to date that I feel I can never give up (and I did a LOT of sports growing up).

While I think I had a rather average dance level progression, I did not have an average dance career. Since starting dance in 2004, I have been a apart of five, yes I said FIVE dance schools. Three were pre-college, and only one move was of my choice. And during that time, I did make PC, but I had never recalled at Oireachtas or ever get a first (in fact my highest placement was a 3rd at least a year and a half before I quit)… so when it was time to leave for college I felt I had to leave things unfinished, and I felt unaccomplished.

Six years passed…during which I earned my Bachelor’s of Science in Chemistry, and I secured a Quality Laboratory job. I was working the Christmas shut down when I was talking to a coworker about dance and decided it had been long enough!

January 2015 I started dancing again. The first week back was hell. I do not remember having so much pain in my hips, knees, legs, ankles, you name it, EVER. I was originally going to start PW and slowly work back to PC when I was ready; but let’s be honest, I am too ambitious and jumped right back into PC. 

By May, I competed in my first feis back. I got 8/11!! I even fell in my reel ( go me!) Over the next several months, I worked, and trained, and cross trained to get back. I could hardly dance two Hornpipes, and I also started suffering from severe shin splints. But by October, I was officially continuously placing in the top three (something I had never done before!) and at the RNE feis I won both my Prelim comps, and my first perpetual trophy. 

I danced at Oireachtas (badly) while suffering a cold. So, again I have yet to recall…

And that brings us to 2016. I just competed in my first feis of the year, and I am happy to say, I placed first out of 10 really tough girls, and I have finally made it into Open; and it only took me 10 years. 

I am glad I have decided to continue what I started. I am determined to keep improving from here. I cannot wait to see what I will accomplish, and all the people I will meet. 

Thanks for reading.

kamalakhan asked:

Hello sir! I'm an avid comic book fan, my favorite being kamala khan (if u couldn't tell haha). In the beginning issues of all new all different avengers, kamala khan was white washed so much I didn't recognize her (& was white w red hair in "Nova"). Other south Asians like myself are upset. Colorism is a huge issue in south Asian communities and having a dark superhero is very important to Pakistanis like myself. Will this problem be addressed? I greatly appreciate u answering this, thank u!

I don’t know that I can agree with you that Ms Marvel was whitewashed in Avengers–that implies intent. But there are different colonists with different approaches, and also a learning curve when it comes to new characters. We’ll keep working to do better.

Confidence has never been my strong point. Under peoples’ eyes I cave and crumble and throw up these walls so that no one can see the panic building up in my chest, stealing my words, all these anxious thoughts spinning in my head. And I walk away with regrets pouring over me: I should’ve said this, I shouldn’t have said that, I said that wrong. Why am I so hopelessly awkward. Why am I afraid. Why can’t I be normal. I walk away with the words not enough cutting deep in my heart, relentlessly pounding in my head over and over again until sometimes the pain becomes too much to bear. Not good enough. Not interesting enough. Not brave enough. Not nice enough. Not pretty enough. Just not enough.

Because sometimes, I just worry that I’ll never be enough for anyone.

But I’m still learning to overcome the lies. I’m still learning that whatever I have to offer is indeed enough. I am enough. I am unique, I am real, I am valuable. And it doesn’t even matter what others think, because to God I know that I’m precious and that I am loved and accepted just as I am. I have nothing to prove to Him. Even at my worst, He still lifts me up and sees me for my best, as His child. He knows that I’m trying. He sees the honest intentions I try so hard to reveal through my life. He knows of the love I have for people and my desire to touch their lives. And I have to realize, I’m never as bad or as awkward or as weird as I think I am. Those are lies the enemy has tried to implant into my mind, but I won’t believe them. I’m human, I have flaws, I’m a little broken. But I still have so much to give. I know that whatever I have to offer others, that God’s going to use it for His good. But I can’t hold back because I’m afraid or that I think I won’t be enough for them to truly love or care for me. You never know what a simple word or action can do to impact someone. I’m still learning that it’s okay to speak and be unsure sometimes because talking isn’t my strength. Love and honesty will always shine through. I’m still learning to be okay with my insecurities in that I don’t see them as walls obstructing my path, but as doors I can work through and come out through the other side even stronger.

I know God didn’t make me purposeless or empty. I have good things to offer, and I won’t hold them back.

I wrote the first two books in serial format and I feel really privileged to have had that experience. I think that was one of the most rewarding creative experiences that I’ve ever had. Just to have the community kind of along with me for the journey and feeding their enthusiasm into the project. I learned so much. That was just a wonderful feeling of camaraderie and community that I really enjoyed.

anonymous asked:

Hi love! I read a fic recently where Harry and Niall are friends. They have a Long term break and Niall suggested Harry learn piano. And Harry finds Louis who is a piano teacher to teach him and they develop feelings for each other. There's finger kink involved. Zayn and Liam are Louis' room mates. Also, there is piano sex involved I saw the tags haha!! I lost it while reading the 2nd chapter. Thank u so much!!! Hope u have an amazing week ahead X ❤️

Hey love, this is No One Like You. :) Harry is 17, so there’s an underage warning! :)

lindseydhorn asked:

Hello @elkstudies! First, I'd just like to say that I adore your blog (and you), and second, I was wondering if you have any advice for Mock Exams? Thanks! xx

Hey!
I’m almost finished mine so here’s what I’ve learned over the last two weeks:

  • Find quick and easy ways to revise - mindmaps and flashcards are my favourites! 
  • Set yourself up a plan and try stick to it; it will help you settle into a routine
  • Limit your time on social media etc. It’s such a distraction, you’ll work much harder without it! 
  • Study as hard as you would for the real exam. It’s the best way to give you an idea of how it will actually work!
  • Work out your timings for exams. Now’s the best opportunity you’re going to get to practice your timings! 
  • Get some exercise in - especially if you have a bad exam it will make you feel a lot better!
  • REMEMBER IT’S ONLY THE MOCKS - if you don’t get the results you want or if you don’t get time to study everything, it’s okay!! The purpose is to show you where you’re at and what you got to do! 

Best of luck!! 

Just a message to any friends who might see it
Don’t count on me coming to NC this summer….. I have no idea what my situation will be like even a week from now so I can’t say anything about July, I don’t know if I can afford it by then,I don’t know if I will even have any days off for it, I know nothing. It’s frustrating since I’ve been living in a constant state of not knowing shit about the future or even feeling secure about anything for almost a year. Not existentially or financially. But it’s reality and I guess it’s usually called “growing up and being an adult”. 

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Hi! I’ve been following for some months now, and i’ve learned so much with your replies! At first i didnt know what to reply to people i wasnt interested. So thank you c:
Anyway… This guy seemed really mature answering my rejection, until i woke up and read his new message. And then says i’m the one harrassing him! Did have a laugh though xD

Thank you for creating this blog. It’s amazing. C:

J: I am so glad you are enjoying the blog and using the info! OMG this guy is beyond disgusting! I was irritated enough at him calling you “lil one” but then it just got worse! Old hag at 49? WTF does that make him at 51?! LOL Ew!

The city isn't all its hopped up to be.

Sure, the trendy coffee shops and endless shopping are great, but theres just something about all of this that already feels a little stale to me. Moving from a place with access to the some of greatest wilderness in North America to the spread out urban landscape of Atlanta is definitely a huge adjustment, and it’s proving to be one of the most difficult ones I’ve ever had to make.

Getting outside used to be almost a daily thing. When you live in the heart of the mountains, surrounded by like-minded people who are as in love with mother nature as much as you are, going on an adventure is as simple as a dropping a text in a group message. Now, I’ve learned it takes days (or even weeks) of planning to have even the most simple outdoor experience.

I miss too many things about Anchorage; the mountains, the spruce trees, the way the air smells so sweet, the northern lights..

There’s nothing like driving down the highway after a long day and seeing the Aurora rippling overhead, and calling up your friends to go on a last minute hike at midnight to take photos of it.

Sadly, the excitement of moving into a new city has quickly subsided. My days in Atlanta have already become bland. Don’t get me wrong; I have lots of good times with my friends here (who are fantastic people by the way). However, practically all of these times occur on the weekends, as everyone is extremely busy during the week. Even though I have a job here, I only work two, maybe three days a week. This leaves me with loads of free time, most of it spent playing Far Cry or watching Netflix, and it’s miserable. It’s like I’m living in some kind of weird, modern purgatory. 

Now don’t interpret this the wrong way;

I’m not trying to sound like I’m sitting here and complaining like some ungrateful jerk. I honestly just feel trapped here. These are just the thoughts that keep me up at night, and blogging them seems to ease the burden on my mind. I love my friends here in Atlanta dearly, and they’re some of the nicest people I’ve had the pleasure of spending time with. However, the city (and the Southeast in general) is just not where I belong.

Here’s to living here for two more years. 


I was going to post it on my blog, but I feel it suited tumblr better. 

anonymous asked:

are u like...endorsing venusintransit.....

I have so much patience for people that are willing to listen, learn, and improve, that are willing to have an honest conversation and look at themselves.

And this is one of the more notable trans woman terfs starting to stand up for herself and reject a lot of the rhetoric she’s dealt with for the hateful, transphobic bullcrap that it is.

So like yeah, I’m kinda glad to see that happening.

THE DAY I SAID “HIATUS”.

I think it’s time for me to stop pretending I have time to write for you guys….

In June I have the biggest exams in my life, and I started learning for it, like a week ago, so right now every single second of my free time goes to studying, because I finally found the course I want to take in University and I don’t want to lose my chance and fail the exams. 

I never thought I would do this to my blog because I love it so much. And I love it because of you guys, you’ve been encouraging me and making me feel loved, so I can’t even explain how grateful I am to every single follower or just a tumblr user who read my stories.

This isn’t a goodbye, I’ll be logged in every day so if either of you want to talk, don’t hold back!!! I’m still here, I just won’t have time to update for a few more months. (Actually if I study hard, I might reward myself and all of you with the next parts of AM <3)

I hope you guys will take me back once I return to writing! 

Wish me luck! 

-With love, your Nami <3


Originally posted by ohhsenshine

I always try to keep in my mind that I must do things that I THINK I can’t do. This is because we usually underestimate ourselves and our ability. We have the potential to do a lot of different things and that’s why I want to learn as much as I can in my life. I want to understand and experience.

Of course sometimes you can feel like your capacity reached the limit. It’s a good thing to know when to give yourself a bit of space and just be without seeking to do something.

But I want to remind you this: we can do so much more than what we think. Already now. We are able to perform incredible performances. We can affect things that feel impossible. We can survive when we feel like there is no way out.❤. #Repost @nude_yogagirl

anonymous asked:

i've been calling myself a lesbian for over a few months now (yay!) and i love it but i cant help being scared out of my mind that i'm wrong and that by calling myself a lesbian so young i'm cutting myself off from men entirely (which is ridiculous bc i dont wanna be with men anyway but its still terrifying) because thats all i knew growing up... any support or positivity for girls like me?

there is so much support for you! you are an amazing individual and it’s completely understandable to get scared like that! i did too! i found it very odd, to say the least, because i was ecstatic to have realized that i’m a lesbian but i was so scared that i wasn’t “lesbian enough” or that i would eventually just fall for a man  (which was like ??? because i Do Not like men) but it’s just learning to validate yourself and find people that will validate you as well. you are a wonderful lesbian and you are great as you are. -mod j