i-have-a-lot-of-feelings-don't-look-at-me

Do I really just want a friendship?

That’s a question I’ve asked myself quite a lot .
I mean I’m always thinking about him, want to talk with him endlessly, get jealous when he’s with other people, try to look “good” for him, stalk him on Facebook, try to get his attention, dream about him and so on …

Are those really feelings you have for someone you just want a friendship with ?

In my case yes, I do am attracted to him, really attracted but that’s not the “love”. I love him in a different way. I don’t want to kiss,fuck,marry him. I just want to spend time with him and just talk. I want to get to know him better. I want to tell him everything and would love him to also trust me so much. That’s the key word : TRUST.
I trust him more then myself and I don’t know why.

fleur delacour falling in love with bill weasley because he sees her. his youngest brother looked and went hair-eyes-teeth-legs, thought body, thought sex. her whole life, men have been looking and seeing a thing, not a girl. since she turned thirteen and bud-breasts pressed up against her shirts and boys at school wanted to sit close, men back home lingered too long in hugs.

until she was fifteen she dressed herself in shame before she put any clothes on at all. wore everything a few sizes too big, a few inches too long. draped herself in thick fabrics to hide the body beneath them. never learned that hot eyes on her were the fault of their owners, not her. took the uncomfortable stares and the endless flirtation as a fact of life. was fourteen the first time she dared to say “stop looking!” and met only laughter.

it’s not until she’s nearly sixteen and her sister is turning ten that she sees eyes begin to slide over her and to gabrielle. a friend of their father’s, not even that deep into a bottle of wine, caresses a child-round cheek and murmurs a line from lolita, eyes too bright and lips too dry. gabrielle flickers a panicked glance around the room. that look is so familiar. the same hour fleur switches her baggy sweatshirt for a crop top and rolls her skirt over two inches. 

they will look at her. never at her sister.

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Inktober 024: I’ve been having a lot of Oikawa feelings recently╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

Tools: Copic Multiliner (0.05), WHSmith’s sketchbook

ykw it was still bothering me that viktor was so mean about yuuri’s weight in the beginning but now that we can look back with viktor’s side of the narrative it makes a lot more sense. so I wanted to share bc I figure a lot of ppl are still feeling a bit sketchy about it.

of course, a good diet is a huge part of being a serious athlete. it’s pretty common to have a balanced meal plan or at least restraint wrt anything unhealthy (and I mean, katsudon is deep-fried pork) since your livelihood is all about the state of your body.

minako says yuuri gains weight easily and can therefore only eat his favorite food as a treat. she once ‘traveled the world as a dancer’. all three of them are international athletes talking about what is probably a common sacrifice they’ve had to make for the sake of their livelihood. (minako probably limited her alcohol consumption, for example.) but yuuri shamelessly admits to self-sabotage to the man who is supposed to be his new coach.

in reality, yuuri wasn’t even sure he was going to continue skating competitively, but viktor thought yuuri was expecting him. he thought yuuri would be ready to get down to business and take their new arrangement seriously. but he gets there, and yuuri isn’t even in shape. of course viktor would be annoyed, even offended at the gall. he has his pride as an athlete, you know! he takes this very seriously! so we see viktor being pretty harsh.

viktor called yakov the best coach he’s ever had, so he’s probably emulating him to a certain extent, and yakov is a major hardass.

but despite his criticism of the state of yuuri’s body, he’s not supporting this spartan idea of yuuri only being allowed to eat his favorite food as a reward for winning. he just tells yuuri that if he’s going to eat katsudon, he should get back in shape first. which is a totally reasonable expectation for an athlete 1) of yuuri’s caliber 2) who wants the most decorated skater alive to be his coach.

and viktor doesn’t threaten to leave if yuuri doesn’t get in shape, he just says he won’t be yuuri’s coach until yuuri is ready to actually be coached. because even if he’s angry at yuuri as a potential coach…

…he’s certainly still interested in yuuri as a potential partner. viktor’s criticisms of yuuri as an athlete have nothing to do with yuuri as a person. he’s just toggling his behavior between Coach Mode and Boyfriend Material Mode (while under the impression yuuri would understand the divide). Coach Mode is trying to be as harsh as yakov, but Boyfriend Mode could not possibly care less. viktor already thinks yuuri is perfectly alluring and attractive, and wants to spend time with him, learn about him, and be intimate with him, regardless of whether he’s fit or chubby.

lucas looking @ riley pt. 1

alright so y’all wanting this, so i’m giving it to you. i have a folder on my computer that has 179 caps in it, so this will probably be split into like 3 posts so they aren’t too long. they’re gonna be in order, so this post will be s1 and the first half of s2. i’m gonna put it under a cut so it doesn’t clog up anyone’s dash, so have fun, enjoy the suffering !!!

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You have your license already, don’t you?

I’ve always enjoyed the dynamic between Bro and Rose on their own and this was inspired by an rp that hit all the marks for me, if only I could’ve hung onto it a lil longer!!

Ginny’s phone buzzes on the bed beside her for the fifth time.

And then the screen lights up again. She looks down at the backlit device. Five messages.

Mike
Please answer.

Mike
I just want to know that you’re okay.

Mike
Okay, that’s not all I want to know. Gin, please.

Mike
I know you’re angry, and you have every right to be. I really want to talk to you.

Ginny unlocks the screen to clear away the messages before she sets her phone to ‘do not disturb.’

Twenty-five minutes later, there’s a knock at her door. 

“Ginny?” Mike’s voice calls out. She stays still and doesn’t attempt to adjust the volume on the TV either. 

“Gin, I know you’re in there. I can here the TV, and I know you don’t just leave it on. Just talk to me. Even if it’s to yell at me and tell me you never want to see me again, I’ll take it. It’s better than this.

“If you don’t answer, I’ll just sit out here all night and keep talking to the door. I’ve got a lot I can say, Gin.”

-10-

Transmatsu headcanon: Karamatsu disappears for a long time and none of the brothers notice. But one day, they find a girl who looks a hell of a lot like them in their house.

It’s Karamatsu. Karamatsu completely transitioned without any of her brothers noticing.

At first, none of them believe it, so they tease and bully her saying it’s just Karamatsu crossdressing as a ploy to get attention. But then Karamatsu starts crying, breaking down and bawling and the rest are just “fuck, we messed u p.” Matsumama comes in and yells at all of them while consoling her daughter (which she and Matsupapa are so happy about because they always wanted a girl) and now the brothers feel just awful.

Karamatsu leaves first to fix her makeup and visit Chibita at his oden stand (to cheer herself up) and Matsumama just hisses at her sons “you better fix this.”

Chibita nearly has a heart attack because while Karamatsu confided in him from time to time about transitioning in passing, he never fully registered what it would mean until seeing Karamatsu now. Chibita is so flustered he barely knows what to do, but Karamatsu starts sobbing about how jerky her brothers are and Chibita gives her everything on the house while telling her she doesn’t need her good-for-nothing brothers anyway.

Cue the good-for-nothing brothers showing up. Jyuushimatsu literally picks Karamatsu up, while Osomatsu downs the rest of her beer and Ichimatsu finishes her leftover oden, and they take her back to the house. In the living room, Jyuushi puts Karamatsu down so she can see that there’s an assortment of food and a cake. Karamatsu is confused an she turns to her brothers as they all bow and say “sorry for being assholes.”

They’re all on good terms now, but Karamatsu is officially 100% impossible to ignore by any of the brothers. Every time she goes out, one or more of them insists on accompanying her (eventually they develop a rotation system to escort her, but Ichimatsu somehow always ends up going with her the most); the only exception being when Karamatsu goes out shopping with Totoko (Ososmatsu will still try to weasel his way into joining them, but Totoko gut punches him and that the end of that).

Choromatsu spoils her the most, mostly because he doesn’t now how to deal with women and showering them with gifts is all he knows to do, picking up random things Karamatsu likes when he goes shopping.

The brothers start getting real suspicious of Karamatsu going off to Chibita’s stand alone, and one day Karamatsu comes home with a bouquet of flowers and the brothers are like “where did you get that??” Karamatsu has this cute pink blush on her face and says “Chibita found some flowers on the roadside and he gave them to me!” All the brothers know that those flowers are too good to have been found on the road and they’re wrapped all nicely too, so they face-palm and curse that Kara has and always will be gullible. (They totally storm Chibita’s oden stand later and threaten him not to mess with their sister, Todomatsu is unsurprisingly the scariest)

Iyami had no idea Karamatsu had transitioned, so when he first sees her, he hits on her like nobody’s business. Too bad she happened to be out with Jyuushimatsu, and he proceeds to beat Iyami within an inch of his life with a bat.

Karamatsu is still painful as always, posing dramatically to fall into men’s arms and dressing up like a “cool” yankii to hit on girls, spouting awful lines that make everyone cringe.


Just, please, someone, anyone, give me this au…give me trans Kara in all the cute dresses and outfits they deserve, receiving all the love they can get from everybody…. ;~;

  • Me: I feel like drawing a thing
  • Brain: *creates mental image of what I want it to look like*
  • Brain: Okay, you think you can do that?
  • Hand: Yup.
  • Hand: *does not draw the thing exactly the way my brain wanted it to look*
  • Brain: Burn this.
  • Me: Why?
  • Brain: It's not perfect. Burn it.
  • Me: But-
  • Brain: Give up drawing forever.
  • Me: But-
  • Brain: Commit seppuku with your pen.

I know i’m making a lot of posts tonight but hear me out. 

A friend of mine from the ndn tumblr community told me today they’ve been getting anonymous messages saying they looks mostly white aka “not native enough”

And i’v seen some of the other mixed ndn’s i follow on my dash have the same thing happen to them. 

And we all know it’s white people, or catty people within our community sending the asks. 

And that needs to STOP. 

BQ is bullshit, and it does not mater. You *are* indigenous no matter your BQ or how you look. I’ll continue to say this forever.

BQ Is meant to hurt us, and control us, NOT to help us. 

There is indigenous people ALL over the world. We can be black,latinx,asian. There is NO right way to “look” indigenous.

-Shannon

8

make me choose: captain swan in s4 or captain swan in s5?
→ asked by carolineeforbes

7

When Seo In Guk looked into eunji’s eyes and sang his part, I think my heart just about burst into fl@mes and a thousand and one pieces.

They are too precious, too good for this world, too pure, too talented. Look at how they look at each other, even after four years. Look how In Guk gives his hand to eunji at the end oh my g@d 🌹you guys have my heart, you guys started everything, legendary!!!

Like honestly I don’t think I’ll ever get over just how dang happy Ford is to have Fiddleford forgive him and call him his friend again.

I mean look at him.

He had resigned himself to Fidds hating him and he thought he’d never be worthy of his forgiveness and you can just see the sense of joy and relief he has over being proven wrong.

I think it can be said without a doubt that Fiddleford was one of the most important people in his life and they cared about each other deeply. So to have his friend back, to earn his forgiveness, and to have it all confirmed in an act that’s as simple and yet powerful as a hug…

It was a short scene and yet I still think it carried so much weight and meaning behind it.

But do people even realize how stressful is to think in English – or to translate your thoughts – when you were born in a country where English is not the native language nor one of the most spoken? Every time I want to post something on my blog, I have to check ten times every single word and sometimes I still make a lot of silly mistakes — I always feel kinda dumb because I know I’m funnier & smarter than I look on here but I’m not fluent enough to express myself and to let you all know the real me.
It may seem stupid but it’s just so frustrating I often think about only reblogging others and stop trying to make posts by myself.