You should have never imposed false hope on me. I waited for autumn for you. You only told me what I wanted to hear. I didn’t need your rose tinted lies. All I wanted was the truth.

But who was I fooling? Of course, you’re still not over her. That is why you were unsure about me. I didn’t want to believe it, I wanted to give you a benefit of a doubt.

One day, you’ll regret running to her, again and again when she doesn’t value you at all. All I can say to you is, run away as fast as you can before it’s too late.

Now I hate your laugh, which used to be my favourite sound, because she’s the one causing it. I hate to see your stupid half smile while you hold hands with her.I hate the two of you because it’s just a reflection of what we could have been. 

We wouldn’t have been perfect but we could have been great and you didn’t even give us a chance.You preferred a highly known road  as opposed to a curvy but exciting new one. 

And it wasn’t fear, it was lack of courage and I shouldn’t blame you but I do, I was stretching out my hand to reach you but you were holding hers.

—  It could have been you and I but you chose her over me

collaboration with @giulswrites. Check out her fab blog!

She cried, punching his chest. “I hate you.”

“I hate your golden brown hair, I hate your stupid smile you always give to me, I hate your smartass personality!” he blocked her next punch and held her small hand.

“Ellie, please,” he said softly, hoping she wouldn’t let go of him. “Please stop.”

She looked up and glared at him, pushing away the guilt and sadness. “I hate you… I hate you, I hate you!”

“I hate that I love you,” she whispered.

“I hate that I love you so much.

—  m.d. // excerpts from a book i’ll never write #10

3:00 AM

I’m drunk,
and listening to all the songs that remind me of you.

3:10 AM

Am I crying?
No, I’m not crying.
These are just tears of inebriation.
I would never cry about you while sober

3:15 AM

I’m laughing
because I enjoyed every moment we spent together.
Every laugh, every wordless exchange,
every smile.

3:20 AM

I hate you.
I hate your stupid smile,
your dumb soft lips
your awful soft hands that used to take residence within mine,
your stupid voice that is still stuck in my head like a beautiful symphony.

3:25 AM

I miss you.
I miss your wonderful smile,
your amazingly soft lips
your soft hands that made my hands feel like they had purpose,
your melodic voice that is still stuck in my head like the most beautiful symphony.

3:30 AM

Realizing I lost you
before I really even had you
is an incredibly sobering thought.
It’s sobered me up enough to write you one last poem.

—  An Inebriated Insomnia
-N.C.O (6/26/14)