the signs as Jean Ralphio
  • Aries: hope you brought a change of clothes, ‘cause your eyes are about to piss tears.
  • Taurus: I made my money the old fashioned way: ♪ I got run over by a Lexussssss ♪
  • Gemini: Tommy T! You just missed the craziest of crazies. clubs. girls. dancing. naked--mom?! argument. fleeing the scene. hiding in a dumpster. coming here. crashing on your couch for a week 'cause ♪technically i'm homeless♪
  • Cancer: When life gives you lemons, steal your grandma’s jewellery and go clubbin’
  • Leo: no, no... that's too mu- that's too much responsibility for me. I got- I gotta find a way out of this
  • Virgo: ♪ she's the wooOOoOorst ♪ she is the worst person in the world
  • Libra: I guess sometimes I call men 'beautiful', too. I guess that means ♪I'm open-minded as heeeelll♪
  • Scorpio: live your life like that cow from that video
  • Sagittarius: ♪K to the N to the O P E she's the dopest little short in all Pawnee, Indiana♪
  • Capricorn: step one: we buy into this club step two: we roll over to the club either in your mercedes benz which is gorgeous or my pre-owned acura legend which is alright step three: i dagger you on the dance floor just bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce now everybodys watching us
  • Aquarius: are you do ding-dongs making fake drugs for sophomores, because if true, this guy wants in!
  • Pisces: ricka ricka ricka ricka! [imitating DJ scratching] [Whispering] Swanson.
want • Shawn Mendes

A/N: There aren’t enough emojis in the world to describe how I’m feeling rn.

Hey guys; today I’m posting a smut piece (as if it’s some 19th century painting - this piece is from the Victorian era and it’s crafted by hand) no, it’s not, well it was crafted by hand (and a lot of hormonal pent up feelings) but this is just smut. Just some filth, and I also feel as if I have to put a warning before? So:

⚠️ Warning: contains smut ⚠️

Enjoy! And feedback would be lovely! I might write a part 2 if y'all want it?

18+ I guess?

Requests: open? (Smut pieces will take longer and I also can’t see the future - sadly - so I dunno how long it’ll take)

Originally posted by illumegeoff

MASTERLIST: Come and check out some of my other mildly average writing!

It’s pathetic really, the way he’s watching her.

He knows that he shouldn’t be, but damn, he’s sure that even the Lord could forgive him for sneaking a peak at the beauty before him.

Moving her hips languidly to the beat flooding through the speakers she dances, the globe of her ass rolling along with her wide hips and her hands flutter down, clasping her hips as she whines, turning full circle.

He’s surprised that no one else is watching, but then he glances around the patio and sees that she’s caught the attention of a few others – men and women alike.

He can’t help but feel jealous, even if he is the one dating her – even if he was the one who had his hands on those hips hours before, guiding them to meet his aching cock.

Their eyes flicker over her sculpted body and they flush, turning red as if they’ve walked in on a private moment, but his girlfriend doesn’t care. She’s having fun and so is Shawn, sitting on the couch and dreaming of all of the ways he’s gonna take her – and let her take him – later on.

Keep reading

Our Bodies (M)

Pairing:  Namjoon x Yoongi x Jooheon x Reader

Genre: Smut, Tattoo(Artist)!AU

Word Count: 9,7k

Warnings: Rough sex, FOURSOME, Punishment Kink, slight Over-stimulation, mentions Alcohol, mentions Tattoos, and well everything that a foursome includes.

“Hm… which tattoo shop is still open?”

Keep reading

(cracks knuckles) Dragon Age: Origins social media au

  • Leliana has a youtube where she does these fucking phenomenal acoustic covers of like. everything. if it exists, she’s got an acoustic cover of it. 
    • also has an inspirational quote blog. not nearly as popular. a little too much Jesus to be mainstream.
  • Alistair is Meme King
  • Zevran is both a famous viner and one of those insta-famous people who’s simultaneously unreal-beautiful and hilarious
    • think chaotic neutral thomas sanders
  • Oghren is vine famous, but he’s not a viner. Zevran just films him doing weird shit a lot.
  • Wynne is the benign older relative who comments “beautiful! tell your mother i said hi. Missing you!” on all your facebook posts but also shares zillions of articles about, like, homeopathic medicine and veganism
  • Morrigan is tumblr famous for her radical feminism, cutting retorts, and killer contour
    • also runs a less popular youtube makeup tutorial channel frequented by wannabe goths
  • the mabari has his own facebook page run by the Warden
  • Sten has an unintentionally iconic twitter
    • horse_ebooks but on accident
    • everyone assumes it’s a comedy/parody twitter but it’s not. that’s just who he is.
  • Shale has a specialized youtube channel a la the hydraulic press guys. it’s just her crushing things in her fist i guess.

allhailtheboi  asked:

Your last post made me wonder, do you not like Chaol or something (i'm not trying to start a fight or anything btw, I'm just curious)?


Okay, so I have to preface all of this with: I love the series. But, no, Chaol is not one of my favourite characters. I guess I opened a can of worms with that answer!

I can appreciate him for the character he is, and his part in the plot (and I just adore Sarah for writing female characters that move on from love interests.) But I never got Chaol. I was never on board the Chaol train. I always found him to be a bit of a wet blanket to be honest? I mentioned before not really falling for the series until Heir of Fire.

I like characters that have a bit more umpf to them: I always thought Dorian was a cutie, a roguishly sweet and charming character despite being a player, if you will (although I was never bothered about him romantically.) But I literally slammed my book shut and almost threw it across the room screaming ‘THERE’S MY GUY’ when Rowan turned up. Brutal, loyal Rowan. (I’ll stop there cause I could ramble all day about Rowan.) I HAVE A LOTTA FEELINGS. There’s no other pairing for me besides A&R - and I’m a little baffled by anyone still pining for Chaol. 

I’m still looking forward to Tower of Dawn(!) and seeing what he gets up to - maybe then he’ll grow on me.

anonymous asked:

I guess requests are open now??? What would the RFA member's reaction to MC eating some kind of candy or food that gets them sexually frustrated or amused? (I'm sorry for this gaahh)

Author’s note: Don’t be sorry, I LOVED WRITING THIS!!! ps: this was asked awhile ago


  • “That was soooo much fun!!!!”
  • Yoosung’s college was hosting a carnival and after days of begging him he finally brought you
  • After your fourth time on the Ferris Wheel, you felt your stomach growl
  • Yooosunggg, can we get something to eat?”
  • He peaked his head over the giant teddy bear he won for you
  • “Sure! I think I saw a food stand around here somewhere…”
  • “I want cotton candy.”
  • “O-Okay! But you know that isn’t the best-”
  • “I know,” you glared at him, “it’s ‘not the best food choice for you.’” 
  • I mean, he eats junk food all the time, why he is lecturing you??
  • He sighed, I guess there’s no way of talking her out of it
  • When you finally found a vendor, you rushed up to him and told Yoosung to find the two of you a seat
  • He found a picnic table and set the bear down next to him
  • You bought the sweet treat and sat across from your boyfriend
  • “Do you want some?”
  • Yoosung shook his head, “Nah, I’m good.”
  • “More for me!”
  • You ripped off a piece of the fluffy candy and placed it on your tongue, letting it melt
  • “Mmm, that’s so good.”
  • Yoosung was mesmerized
  • He watched as you continued to eat, taking a piece, placing it on your tongue, and letting it melt
  • Every so often you would let out a satisfied groan
  • I mean, how good IS that cotton candy??
  • Yoosung felt his face heat up as he watched you suck the sticky residue off of your fingers
  • When you finished, you licked your lips, trying to get the last of the stubborn sugar
  • You got up and stretched, “Ready to go?”
  • He continued to stare at you
  • “…Yoosung?”
  • “A-Ah, sorry! Let’s go.”
  • He stood up and gave you an embarrassed smile
  • “What do you want to do next?”
  • You were about to answer, when you noticed something
  • “Yoosung?”
  • “Hmm?”
  • You smirked and walked toward him, stopping right in front of him
  • “Looks like someone got a little… excited,” you whispered.
  • He looked down and gasped
  • Quickly, he grabbed the bear he had won and placed it in front of him
  • He looked back up at you, face BRIGHT red
  • “I-I’m sorry, it’s just-”
  • You put a finger to his lips, “I think I know what I want to ride next.”
  • He almost passed out then and there
  • You reached into his pocket and grabbed his keys
  • He’s basically dead at this point
  • “Let’s go home.”


  • He laughed when he saw you walking back from the buffet table it was “just for cast,” but Zen had smooth talked the director into letting you have some
  • You had a MOUNTAIN of strawberries (with the tops cut off) piled onto a tiny plate and one stuffed in your mouth
  • You set the plate down on the table and sat across from your boyfriend
  • “Why’re yew laughng,” you attempted to speak mid-chew
  • Zen covered his mouth, a smile still evident on his face
  • “You’re just…”
  • You raised an eyebrow, “Just what?”
  • “SO cute!!” he leaned forward and kissed your forehead
  • You swallowed the rest of the strawberry and glared at him
  • “Zen, you know I hate being called that!”
  • He rested his head on his chin, “But its trueeee!!!”
  • Sighing, you looked back down at the plate of strawberries on the table
  • That gives me an idea…
  • You picked up another strawberry and bit off the tip, letting your lips linger around it
  • “Mmm,” you closed your eyes, “this strawberry is amazing!”
  • You leaned forward slightly, pressing your upper body against the table, “You should try it, babe.”
  • Before he could say anything, you gently forced the berry into his mouth
  • He reluctantly bit it, maintaining eye contact with you the entire time
  • You retracted your arm and smiled, “Wasn’t that good?”
  • Zen looked around to make sure no one was staring
  • “MC, what are you doing?”
  • You furrowed your brows and tilted your head, “Me? I’m just trying to share some food with boyfriend, simple as that!!”
  • He gave you a suspicious look and shrugged, “If you insist!!”
  • Zen reached out for another strawberry
  • “Oh no you don’t!!”
  • You smacked his hand away from the plate
  • He cradled his hand and looked up at you
  • “What the hell?”
  • “Only I’m allowed to give you one.”
  • He smirked, “Someone’s feeling a little… controlling.”
  • I’d rather you say I was-“
  • You leaned over the table and got close to his face
  • “-dominating.”
  • Zen gulped, a light blush quickly spreading across his face
  • He clenched his fist, “MC, you know I can’t control the beast when you act like this…”
  • Without moving away from his face, you reached for another strawberry
  • “Open up!”
  • You placed one part of the strawberry in your mouth and closed the gap between your lips and his
  • He took the bait, taking the strawberry out of your mouth and eating it
  • You leaned away and looked at your boyfriend
  • You had to bite your lip to keep from laughing
  • His eyes were filled with pure lust, and his cheeks were flushed
  • “C-Come with me.”
  • He stood up and held out his hand
  • “And bring the strawberries,” he looked down at the table
  • You happily obliged as he lead you to his dressing room
  • Before entering, you stopped and turned to him
  • “Not so cute now, am I?”
  • He stared at you for a second before kissing you, leading you into the room and closing the door behind you


  • POP
  • “That was really nice of Jumin to give us that gift basket!”
  • POP
  • “Uh-huh…”
  • POP
  • “Of course, he doesn’t really like sweets, so I guess it wasn’t really out of the goodness of his heart.”
  • POP
  • “Y-Yeah.”
  • POP
  • “Jaehee, are you okay?”
  • She gave you a silent nod, her eyes never leaving your lips
  • Jaehee watched you put the lollipop into your mouth and pop it back out
  • Your tongue continued swirling around the candy, making little wet sounds as you went on
  • She took a big breath, trying to calm herself
  • Jaehee rubbed her slightly sweaty hands on her pants and stood up
  • “I-I’ll be right back.”
  • You looked at your flustered girlfriend, slightly confused
  • Before she could leave, you grabbed her wrist, pulling her close to you
  • You placed a hand on her forehead
  • “You feel kinda warm, and your cheeks are flushed. Are you sick?”
  • Jaehee bit her lip, “N-no, it’s not that.”
  • When you leaned in closer, your hand brushed her inner thigh
  • Jaehee sucked in a sharp breath and looked away, her glasses slightly fogging up
  • “MC, be careful.”
  • You smirked
  • Now I get it.
  • You turned her face toward you and leaned in
  • “Let’s take a trip back to the bedroom.”
  • Jaehee stared at you before closing the gap, pressing her slips lightly against yours
  • When you pulled back, she smiled
  • Taste just like candy.


  • The RFA was holding their daily meeting, and Jaehee was updating everyone on the current status of the party
  • But Jumin wasn’t listening to A WORD she was saying
  • His attention was focused purely on you
  • He thought back to this morning, when this whole situation began

When you woke up, you heard your alarm clock going off. Confused and still half asleep, you rolled over to look at it.


You shot up, disturbing your sleeping boyfriend.

“MC, stop moving.”

“Jumin it’s almost 8 o’clock… we’re going to be-”

He was out of bed before you could finish.

“Get dressed and grab something you can eat on the go. I won’t have time to make pancakes this morning.”

You nodded, heading to your closet and grabbing the first shirt you could find.

  • He sighed
  • Of course you had to choose a banana…
  • Completely unaware of Jumin’s heavy stare, you continued eating your breakfast, taking dainty little bites every couple of seconds
  • Jumin clenched his jaw, trying to calm himself
  • As you were finishing it up, he watched as you shoved the rest of it into your mouth
  • Shit.
  • He stood up and cleared his throat
  • “MC, I have an idea for a guest that I must discuss with you.”
  • Jaehee sighed, “Can’t it wait until after the meeting?”
  • Jumin glared at his assistant
  • “No.”
  • He quickly left the room, MC on his heels
  • “What’s the name of-”
  • As soon as the door closed, Jumin pushed you against the wall and grabbed your chin
  • Desperately, he pressed his lips to yours
  • After pulling away, he looked into your eyes
  • “I need you. Now.”
  • He dragged you away from the conference room and down the hall
  • When he walked into the office he let go of your wrist
  • “W-what the hell, Jumin?”
  • He locked the door and walked toward you, his eyes never leaving your lips
  • Before you knew it, you were backed up against his desk
  • “Jumin-”
  • In one quick motion he lifted you up and placed you on his desk
  • He began kissing your neck
  • “I love you,” his kissed down your jawline, “so damn much.”
  • Needless to say, the two of you never got back to that meeting


  • “Saeran is gonna be sooo jealous!”
  • You and Seven had decided to take a little detour on your ride home from work by stopping to get some ice cream
  • Of course, you didn’t think about Saeran until AFTER you ordered
  • “Hold this, I have an idea,” you handed Seven your ice cream cone
  • You pulled away from the drive thru, “I’ll just park outside the house and we’ll eat it in the car! That way we’ll finish it before Saeran even knows!
  • Seven smiled, “It’ll be our little secret.”
  • You drove back to your home and pulled into the driveway
  • When you parked the car he handed you back your ice cream
  • “Bon appetite, my sweet,” he winked
  • Quickly, you grabbed your ice cream cone and got to work
  • Seven focused on his cone, basically INHALING it
  • 2 minutes later, he was done
  • “That was amazing,” he said, wiping his fingers
  • He looked back over to you
  • WHAT?? You’ve barely made a dent!!”
  • You shrugged and gave him a look, “I like to actually taste my food before swallowing it.”
  • He sighed as you went back to eating your cold treat
  • Seven watched as you dragged your tongue around the rim of the cone
  • He bit his lip to hold back a moan
  • As you continued to lap away at your ice cream, Seven felt his core heat up
  • He followed each movement of your mouth as you continued to lick, letting imagination take control
  • “Damn,” you sighed, “I don’t think I’ll be able to finish.”
  • You looked over at your husband, “Do you want the rest?”
  • He stared blankly at you, still biting his lip
  • “Seven?”
  • He shook his head, zoning back in, “…Hmm?”
  • You held up your ice cream, “Do you want this??”
  • “Sure.”
  • He reached for the cone and took it too quick, causing some of the ice cream to fall on his pants
  • “Shit, sorry-”
  • “Don’t worry about it,” you interrupted, grabbing a napkin out of the bag
  • You began wiping the melted dessert off of his pants
  • “You don’t have to-aHH!”
  • Seven’s hips thrust forward as you wiped the napkin across his crotch area
  • Smirking, you looked up at him
  • “Hmm, I might need to check if any seeped through to your underwear,” you leaned forward, messing with his zipper
  • “MC,” he hissed under his breath, “don’t be such a tease!”
  • Before you could take it any further, you heard someone clear their throat
  • You leaped back, hitting your head on the car door
  • “SAERAN??”
  • Seven’s twin stood in front of the car with his arms crossed
  • “H-how long have you been standing there?”
  • He remained silent, ignoring his brother’s question
  • After a couple of seconds he sighed
  • “Next time… you better get me some damn ice cream.”
  • With that, turned around and walked back toward the house, leaving Seven and MC both bright red messes
Bark and Bite | 01 (M)

Originally posted by sugastoungetechonawlogy

Summary: Since getting a new dog, Yoongi has started to grow closer to you, his neighbor. Little does he know that you have something to hide.

Word Count: 7.1k

Member: Yoongi ft. Min Holly and Taehyung, mostly Holly

Genre: Fluff, Smut, Werewolf!AU

A/N: Dedicated to Min Holly. Also technically a late Halloween thing, but werewolves are always in season, right? Inspired by a drabble I once did for @pjimns.

​Yoongi didn’t consider himself particularly a dog person or a cat person. Sure they’re both very cute, but he never had a particular preference for either. In fact he’s not sure if he considers himself an animal person at all. Which is why he is completely baffled when Taehyung asks him to come look at a litter of puppies. Apparently, someone his friend knows just gave birth to a litter of toy poodles (well his friend’s dog, not the friend).

Taehyung dragged Yoongi with him to supposedly help pick one out. Yoongi had assumed the dog was for Taehyung, but that day he comes home holding a dog of his own. He decided on the name Holly, and despite never really being the biggest fan of dogs, he can’t help but want to coo over this adorable creature. His adorable creature.

Keep reading

Harrison Osterfield Imagine - Late Night Loving (smut)

request: Can I get an Harrison Osterfield imagine (smut) where it’s the Spider-Man hoco premier after party and there both wasted and they have a one. Igor stand and they don’t see each other for a few months after words and some how they hit it off in the end and start dating or like it ends in pure fluff??

a/n: i guess this is open for a part 2? maybe

word count: 1842

Harrison was a lot of things when he was drunk; he was confident and cocky; he was a terrible dancer and he sung along loudly to the music, even when he didn’t know the words; he was unsteady on his feet and spent most of the night clinging onto the bar so he didn’t fall over - but above all, Harrison was awfully flirty.

Handing you the drink he just bought for you, he moved fractionally closer to you so that his knee brushed yours every now and then. Politely thanking him, you took a sip of your cocktail, maintaining his eye contact as you sucked on the plastic straw.

Keep reading

Stubborn boy•Shawn Mendes

Originally posted by pickeringgod

Request: Can you write a Shawn imagine where you guys are visiting your parents for the weekend and Shawn isn’t feeling very well at the end of the day when you guys are laying down to go to sleep and he is upset because he doesn’t want to feel sick when you guys are at your parents ?? And maybe he can’t sleep because he starts feeling really bad and throws up a bunch throughout then night? Thanks love!

A/N: !!!!!first request ever!!!! woo!! hope you like it anon, hope it was what you pictured! ✨ I guess requests are open? send me all ur ideas and I’ll see what I can do!!✨💖

Warnings: N/A (if ur afraid of puking i guess this isnt the one for u) 

MASTERLIST - Hey come and check out some of my other mildly average writing!

He wasn’t as chatty as usual.

You had thought, naively, that he was just nervous – that he was just too busy over thinking the idea of staying over at your parents. Yet he was sweating, his forehead was slick with perspiration despite having the AC blasting throughout his jeep and the windows open.

Keep reading

sniperheadsout  asked:

Rfa and V & Saeran finding MC naked for accident?? Sorry 4 my bad english :( thank u, lots of love 4 u!

Just a note: This one gets vaguely NSFW

And thank you for the love! uwu <3


  • You didn’t realize that Zen had gotten home while you were in the shower, so you figured that it’d be safe to go out into the living room without a shirt on.
  • You were completely naked besides your underwear, but you could smell your cookies burning in the oven and you had to save them.
  • You run past him sitting on the couch, and he doesn’t even look up from his phone, so you still don’t realize he’s there. 
  • Once your cookies were safe and out of the oven, you let out a sigh
  • “Oh, sorry babe. I thought about taking them out but I didn’t want to… distu-….. fuck.”
  • You hear his voice from like three feet away and you’re just
  • screaming internally
  • “Y’know…. Uhm.”
  • “Zen, I’m naked” was all you could think to say.
  • “I see.”
  • “Go away.”
  • “Yeah, okay.”
  • He only went to sit on the couch, but he didn’t stop staring at you from his seat.
  • He smirked motioned for you to go back to the restroom to retrieve your clothes, so you just covered what you could and ran.
    • Alternate ending: Sit on his lap.


  • He closes the door after leaving, but you poke just your head back out after opening it again.
  • “Hon, did you need something?”
  • “Uhm, yeah, have you, oh man…”
  • “…………okay Yoosung.”
  • You just went back in the room and put your clothes on. You could figure out whatever he wanted later, but he wasn’t going to be able to focus if you were naked.
  • When you found him, he was in front of the open refrigerator with his sleeves rolled up.
  • He had a bag of frozen vegetables down his shirt what a weirdo.
  • What a cute, blushy boy.
  • His face was so red holy shit.
  • “Yoosung, let me help you cool off.”
  • You’re trying your darn best to get his shirt off of him, but he’s not having it.
  • Let’s just say that you two were very late to the RFA party.


  • “Hey, Jaehee, have you seen my black bra? Either of them? And my pants? I literally can’t find any of my clothes.”
  • “They should both be in the bedroom or hanging above the washer.”
  • “Oh, cool. Above the washer… Thanks babe!”
  • You placed a light kiss to her cheek from behind, assuming that she wouldn’t take her attention away from the papers in front of her, because she never does.
  • As you were walking off, she could only see your upper half due to the counter blocking her vision, but she saw some very faint scratch marks from a few nights earlier and she just,
  • Her face turned so pink.
  • She had to shove tissues up her nose to keep from making a mess on her papers.
  • When you came back out with clothes on, it turned into a makeout session, but there wasn’t time for it to escalate any further.
  • She couldn’t stop thinking about it all day, so it was one hell of a night.


  • “MC, we have to leave in fifteen minutes. Will you be rea-”
  • You were leaned over the counter, putting on your makeup, fresh out of the shower.
  • He cleared his throat and turned his body back towards the door, but he didn’t take his eyes away from you.
  • You suddenly became self conscious and tried to cover yourself, but with what he could see in the mirror and from behind, that was hard to do.
  • Instead of eventually leaving like you thought he might, he began to walk towards you.
  • He gently placed a hand on your waist and leaned over you, pushing you farther into the counter in the process.
  • “I look forward to seeing you like this again tonight.”
  • The way he whispered and how you were so vulnerable definitely got you excited, but when you turned around to kiss him, he pushed you away.
  • “I wouldn’t want to ruin your makeup… and we don’t have time. Just be patient.” When you pouted, he laughed and added, “Oh trust me, I want the same thing. We just both have to wait.”
  • When you were home later that night, you nearly murdered him for getting you bothered and then telling you to wait, but he knew how to make you forgive him.


  • “MC, you’re going to use up all the hot water! I have to take a shower too!”
  • “Okay, I’ll be out in a few minutes.”
  • He gave you a hard time as he walked out of the bathroom, but he left, so you didn’t argue with him.
  • Like five minutes later, he bursts back in, ready to give you a hard time again, but you have the shower curtain already open.
  • It’s honestly like something out of a manga. Your hair is dripping, boobs squished together, looking at him, expecting him to either do something or leave.
  • His nose starts bleeding what the fuck
  • “Get out quick.”
  • “Don’t you wanna wait for the warm water to come back?”
  • “… I…. definitely need the cold water.”
  • You wrapped a towel around yourself, then booked it out.
  • When you came back in to grab your clothes, you heard mumbled “Damn it”s and “shit, dude”s and “Get it together, there’s no time for that”s.


  • You were in the process of getting ready to go to a new years eve event with V. 
  • You did your hair and makeup right after getting out of the shower to give your outfit some time to dry. You forgot to do laundry the night before )^:
  • Everything’s dry except for your underwear, so you decide to put everything else on and come back for them right before you have to leave.
  • You’re in the middle of throwing your skirt on when V walks into the room.
  • “Oh, sorry. I just wanted to let you know….”
  • He turns his back to you, but he doesn’t actually leave.
  • You scramble to put on some more clothes, seeing that you were only in your socks and skirt, but he approached you and lightly grabbed your wrist.
  • Your skirt was sent back to the floor and you were softly pushed up against the bed.
  • “You know…. If you didn’t mind…. Nobody would notice… if we were….. just a little bit late.” He says between kisses he places on your neck.
  • “You’re making this too easy, Jihyun.”
  • “I’ve been thinking about doing this to you since last night.”
  • You guys were a little late to the event, but he probably would have made you leave early if you didn’t get that business squared away beforehand.


  • “Hey MC, have you seen my black shirt?”
  • “Which one?”
  • “Oh, let me look for it I guess.”
  • He opens the door to the closet without giving you any warning.
  • “Wait SaERAN I’M NAKED.”
  • He just looks you up and down and smiles.
  • “Oh.” He leans in and kisses you. “Cute.”
  • You’re just standing there, face burning, and when he turns away from you to look from his shirt, you frantically try to dress yourself.
  • “Aha! I found it!”
  • You get a smack on the ass and another light kiss as he walks out.

anonymous asked:

Boyband and s/o went on hunting and before they could attack the animals, one of the animals starts to mate with another animal, s/o is all like, oh my... so do we attack or do we wait for it to be over?

LOL- let’s see how the chocobros react to this little scenario, huh? Gonna keep these short and sweet :)

Tagging some pals: @blindbae, @itshaejinju, @lady-asuka, @nifwrites, @the-lucian-archives, @cupnoodle-queen, @alicemoonwonderland, @xalexanderxkozachenkox, @insomniacapples, @fieryfantasy and @asendioncosplay <3

Noctis: Noctis’s gaze switched between looking at you and wincing at the Garula and Garulessa mating rather vigorously before the two of you. You clutched the hilt of your rapier in your hand, unable to rip your eyes away from the rather disturbing scene in front of you. You and Noctis ended up staring silently at each other, only able to hear the loud grunts and whines of the animals mating. After a few moments of contemplation, Noctis cocked his head in the direction of the river. “Change of plans,” he whispered as he gently took your wrist in his grasp and tugged you in the direction of the river, “we’re having fish tonight.”

Prompto: You almost laughed at how flustered Prompto was at your question. He glanced down at his gun before glancing at you, a pink flush on his adorably freckled cheeks. “Um, I don’t know. I guess we have an opening…” Prompto began, but was interrupted by a loud snort from the, um, pleasured animals in front of the two of you. You giggled behind your hand and shook your head at Prompto’s cute reactions. Prompto glanced at you, shaking his head and shutting his eyes momentarily before shaking his head again- almost like he was trying to convince himself of something extremely important. “No- killing them while they’re making a baby would be rude. Or something… let’s go find something else!” Prompto immediately pulled you away from the debauched scene, as you continued to giggle in mirth at the whole situation.

Gladio: Gladio raised his eyebrows at the two Spiracorns going at it before him. You could barely keep yourself from laughing at the shocked, yet curious look on Gladio’s ruggedly handsome face. “Babe… that thing is HUNG!” Gladio suddenly exclaimed softly, nudging you and pointing right at the male Spiracorn’s sexual organ. You rolled your eyes at where Gladio’s attention was at, swatting at his muscled arms in response. Gladio chuckled dorkily before shaking his head and shouldering his broadsword, swatting you on your backside as he retreated from the scene. “Good on that Spiracorn- showing his lady a good time. Let’s come back when they’re done fucking.”

Ignis: Ignis cleared his throat at the awkward scene unfolding before him. You could barely suppress your laughter at the clearly disturbed look on Ignis’ face. Stepping up right beside Ignis, you glanced at the mating Coeurls briefly before nudging Ignis in the ribs gently. “So… should we wait until they’re done, or…?”

Ignis shook his head and cleared his throat once more before gripping his daggers in his hands firmly and stepping forward quietly. “No, this should be an easy kill. They’re rather distracted- we will not get a better opportunity to rid the area of these beasts.”

You frowned a little at Ignis’ clinical mind-set. “Okay… so now I can tell people that I’ve killed living beings while they were having ‘the sex’. Interesting dinner table story, for sure!” you jibed as you followed behind Ignis.

“Shut up, y/n. This is as awkward for me as it is for you.”


Cor: Cor merely stared impassively at the mating behemoths before glancing your way and giving you an affirmative signal to attack. Your jaw dropped immediately, and you pointed at the two beasts caught up in a haze of passion. “Are you crazy Cor? This is so dishonourable!” You exclaimed. Cor shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly.

“No one ever said I was honourable, did they? Let’s kill these fuckers- heh, get it?”

You stared at Cor, your very being the epitome of deadpan.

“Seriously, Cor? Your jokes are terrible. Stop.”

Needing for Attention - Request

Requested by @newts-fan-case:  think about how hot this would be: reader dry humping Sherlock to get him out of his mind palace, at first he ignores it but when he can’t take it anymore he roughly takes her on his way to his room (against the wall maybe) cause he is that desperate.
& anon: A fic where the reader is bored/horny while Sherlock is in his mind palace so the reader tries to get his attention by touching him and smutty stuff?
& anon:  Will you do a sherlockxreader imagine where the reader goes down on him and then he returns the favor?? (I have a dirty mind 😂)

Pairing: Sherlock x reader

Word count: 1,625

Warnings: Smut - unprotected, oral (female and male receiving), rough, dry humping.

A/N: I couldn’t help but to mix the requests because I felt like they would fit and this… This was… Wow.


Sherlock had been sitting at the exact same spot for two and a half hours. He didn’t move, he didn’t flinch, and he definitely didn’t pay attention to (Y/N).

She was used to it, really, but that night was different. Maybe the hormones, or simply her need to relieve stress, but she was horny as hell and she needed Sherlock to get her off.

“Sher…” She whispered flirtingly in his ear. The detective ignored her. “I need you to help me with a little something.”

Sherlock didn’t show any sign of concern about her innuendo. (Y/N) sighed heavily and started rubbing his shoulders. He was sitting at his usual chair. “Sherlock…” She chanted.

The detective remained indifferent to her. (Y/N) was starting to get desperate, so she did what she had never thought of doing. She got on his lap and started moving her hips back and forth as she pressed herself tightly around one of his thighs.

Keep reading