Incomplete list of things Vlad Masters has done
  • Attempted to kill an old college friend and then marry his wife and adopt their kids as his own
  • Attempted to clone his college friend’s son multiple times after that first plan failed
  • Ran for mayor because a 14-year-old pranked him
  • Gave another 14-year-old a suit full of deadly weapons and tracking devices just for his own stalking purposes
  • “I. WILL. NOT. GET. A. CAT!!”
  • Got a cat anyway
  • Named the cat after his crush in college and played chess with it
  • Used food names as swear words
  • Made a 14-year-old and a 16-year-old fight in his own private stadium 
  • Created multiple holograms of his old college crush and programmed them to adore him
  • Released an extremely powerful and dangerous ghost just to make himself look good as mayor
  • Attempted to steal an entire ghost portal after he accidentally blew up his own portal
  • Attempted to buy the Green Bay Packers but failed, so instead he decorated his mansion with all kinds of Packers merch, including a signed football which he referred to as his most priced possession
  • Almost destroyed earth, twice
  • Tried flirting with help of a book called “Romance for Rich Creepy Dimwits” 
  • “Your agency and my agency are constantly competing and why do you keep taking over my missions.” AU
  • “I’m an agent and you’re an evil mastermind and I was assigned to kill you but now you have me hostage and oh god you’re hot.” AU
  • “I was assigned to assassinate a mass murderer but it looks like you- their soon to be victim- has it under control. I’m recruiting you.” AU
  • “We’re both prestigious spies who are constantly trying to be better than the other and now we’ve been paired up just shoot me instead.” AU
  • “You’re some newbie and I’m going to be teaching you all about espionage. Quick, let’s have hand to hand combat which has close contact.” AU
  • “We have to pretend to be a newlywed couple at a gala our enemy is hosting quick kiss me to make this believable.” AU
  • “I just walked in on you kicking some serious ass and oh my god did a laser just come out of your watch are you James Bond?” AU
  • “We’re roommates and you are super secretive all the time and are going out every night only to come back at ungodly hours I guess I’m following you next time.” AU
  • “Apparently my grandmother’s locket I wore tonight to this fancy dinner is being sought after by thieves and you’ve been assigned to keep it safe at all costs- HEY LET GO OF ME I’M NOT GOING TO YOUR ‘HEADQUARTERS’ ASSHOLE.” AU
  • “I’m obsessed with spies and when my friend set us up on a blind date you happened to be on a mission oh my god you have a self destructive pen I’m going to wet my pants in excitement.” AU