i-get-lost-in-my-mind

starter pack || "kicker" edition
  • “Why do you treat me so cold?”
  • “Hold me.”
  • “I’m in love.”
  • “Don’t worry, baby.”
  • “Don’t you cry.”
  • “We’ll keep burning like we’re never going to die.”
  • “God is on our side.”
  • “We’re all alone.”
  • “I’m not in my right mind.”
  • “What you’re afraid of is where I just came from.”
  • “I think that I’m broken.”
  • “I get the feeling that I’m giving up on something I love too much.”
  • “I want to get so lost in the great escape.”
  • “I feel so unstable.”
  • “We shouldn’t have to try so hard.”
  • “Can we go back to the world we had?”
  • “We were made to last.”
  • “I don’t belong here.”
  • “Show your face.”
  • “Finish what you started.”
  • “You do it to me so well.”
  • “The fact I’m still alive is why I believe in miracles.”
  • “We’re running these streets.”
  • “I’ve been hearing all these things about you.”
  • “No one knows where you came from.”
  • “I was mistaken.”
  • “Love’s not meant to be lost.”
  • “I’m not a follower.”
  • “You don’t need him like I do.”
  • “I know I’ll be okay.”
  • “Maybe I don’t want you either.”
  • “You want to leave?”
  • “You’re on your own.”
  • “We can keep our secrets.”
  • “Where you are, I will be.”
  • “I will take the pieces and put them back together.”
TEEN WOLF 5x01
thoughts on the episode

• stiles and scott talking about collage and how they’re all going to live near each other and the vision stiles has for all of them after senior year. i thought it was extremely cute.

• liam fucking dunbar acting like a lost puppy for the whole entire episode. scott and stiles were treating him like the annoying little brother. defiantly one of my favourite parts of the episode.

• parrish hallucinating lydia after getting attacked by the creature. maybe banshees can connect with whatever supernatural creature parrish is, or just a coincidence.

• when melissa was alone in the house with the creature(?) i was honestly screaming so much. if she didn’t narrate everything, there was no doubt in my mind that she would end up like parrish and get threatened by the creature. good job melissa for talking to yourself it saved your life.

thoughts on the name writing scene

• when stiles wrote his initials the camera didn’t show what he wrote. i think they did that because stiles wrote his actual initials instead of SS (stiles stilinski)

• kira getting all flustered and nervous when it was her turn to write because she thought she would get in trouble for vandalizing

• malia writing MT instead of MH. i was so proud.

• scott mccall going to write his initials and the pack looking at him knowing that this is probably really hard for him and then he pauses after writing his initials and writes AA. honestly messed with my emotions so much.

• and then i was so in love with kira for not getting jealous and just holding and comforting scott.

• lydia saying she still is with so much confidence because she always knew that allison was with her. she didn’t need to be a genius to know that.

thoughts on episodes continued

• the creature interrupting kira and scotts make out session and trying to kill scott. not cool bro.

• as soon as scott saw his pack it was like he gained all his strength back.

• theo, thats all

• lydia having flashbacks or hallucinations about the pack dying/getting injured. i’m not sure if those things actually happened, i don’t think so but you never know

• sheriff and melissa fighting?

final thoughts

• i think allison is coming back.

• i dont think stiles will actually be in a car accident

• i think lydia or malia is going to die

You did it !!!!!

So I set you out on a treasure trail this morning to find clues and to feel loved, and just to let you know how much I love you and how much you mean to me. I have never felt a love like yours before ever in my life.

You are incredible. You make me feel like I am worth something like I am worthy of happiness. Without you Id be lost forever. Id fall into the darkness of my mind and Id never get out. Sarah you are the reason in here, the reason I’m suppose to be alive.

You became my hero and the hand in the light. You reached out and I grabbed tight and Ive never let go. And I never will. You pulled me out of my darkness and into a world filled with your love and incredible colour.

There isn’t enough words in the world that could describe how I feel about you and how beautiful you are. I look at you and I instantly fall deeper and deeper in love every second of every day. You have the most perfect everything.

Currently you are on the phone and I can hear you breath as you sleep and If I close my eyes I feel your presence. You make the sweetest little sounds and you sound so peaceful I love sharing moments like that with you. I love how it makes me feel that little bit closer. Help me feel like you are more real. Hearing you breathe is incredible. I love you so much.

We have been on the phone for 6hrs+ now

I could honestly stay on the phone and write this message for hours and hours. There are so many amazing things I could write about you. OMG like seriously you are so cute!! You are a restless sleeper I can hear you toss and turn trying to get comfortable I can wait to share a bed with you again! I can’t wait to be tangled like a pretzel a mess but also feels so right. I can’t wait to wake up again and see your cute face and kiss your forehead as you wake up. I can’t wait to lots of things with you, go on dates, introduce you to my family and friends, watch movies, go site seeing. It’s going to be an amazing trip!

Ok so this is the end of your treasure hunt :)

The phone cut out 😩
so call me when you get this

I love you with every part of me

Sarah Dawn Suiter
I want to be with you forever

I’m sorry if that scares you or is too much but I do, I want to marry you !

You have helped through everything, you came to me and my darkest times and didn’t even think twice about it. You are an incredible person and the care you have for people is out of this world. You make me wanna be a better person. I look at you and feel inspired to do better to be better. I am honestly beyond blessed that I get to call you my gf and the day I get to call you my wife will honestly be the most amazing thing to ever happen to me.

I’m gonna give you everything you ever wanted, im gonna make sure you smile everyday, Sarah you are my goal. Your happiness is my goal. I will make sure you don’t worry about a thing again and if you do i will be right here to help take that worry away. I promise to always love you good and bad days, I promise to hold your hand, take showers with you, make you breakfast every morning and a pack lunch 😁, I promise to always kiss you goodnight and hold you, I promise to make my priorities you! You are my number one. You are the reason I get up in the morning and the reason I smile everyday.

Sarah you are my forever.

I hope you enjoyed your social media treasure hunt.
I love you

Challenge number 7
Love me forever… Be my wife
Sarah will you marry me ?

P.s
Thank you for picking me 🙈😘😊

Always and Forever
Amber J
X x X x X

flickringlight
chapter six

back to chapter five


MAY 22ND

elleya grace

The moment my eyes are met with the sunlight pouring into the bedroom I immediately wished I was asleep again. Sleeping meant peace for me. It meant I could be at peace without thinking—over-thinking. I wanted my mind to be free of any thoughts that could eat me alive and instead be filled with thoughts that could take my mind off those other thoughts. But, I couldn’t fall back asleep. Once I’m awake, I can’t close my eyes and get lost in empty dreams again.

With little to no effort, I dragged myself out of bed and walked out of my room. The whole place is cast in silence. It was relieving, really. I didn’t have to wake up to Katelyn nagging at me about how I should act normal or how I should try speaking to people besides her. Truth is though, I didn’t even talk to her as much as it may seem so. I kept our conversations short; sometimes I even tried to avoid getting into deep conversations with her. They were all efforts to keep my mind free.

As humans we all desire to be free, but even when you believe you are free, you aren’t. There’s always a boundary keeping us from reaching full freedom. But, that’s life. Life will never be free. No one can ever be free, but one can try to be. I may not be completely free but I did everything I could to get exactly that. I had days where I was trapped; trapped by a dark burden clouding my thoughts. That’s when I was anything, but free. And that’s when I’m suffocating. It’s a terrifying feeling and I often felt as if my head is pounding, like it could explode.

When I reached the kitchen I went straight to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of water. I took small sip then walked over to the table where I spotted my notebook. I made my way over to sit down, my attention still remaining on the black notebook. Katelyn always knew never to look at it. The day I got it I painted a red X on it and told her that it meant it was private. That notebook held everything. It held my thoughts, my fears, my life. It was everything I couldn’t share with the world.

My train of thought was abruptly interrupted when there was a knock on the door. I figured it was Katelyn, being that she had a habit of being forgetful, and most likely left her key at home. So, I sighed, got out of the seat and opened the front door.

“You should really stop forgetting your ke—oh.” I quickly went silent seeing the familiar pair of blue eyes. Luke was the last person I wanted to see. I would’ve been better off with Katelyn answering the door, but apparently life wanted to slap me in the face.

“Your voice is far more cute than I imagined.” He said quietly. I shook my head at his words and closed the door, but Luke stopped it with his hand. “Look I know you don’t particularly like me, Elleya, but you’re the only person who listens to me.”

Then stop coming to me. Find someone else who’s worth your time.

I didn’t bother to look him in the eyes and I knew he wasn’t going to go away, so I back away from the door. I began to walk into the kitchen, in attempt to avoid being to close to him. Much to my displeasure, Luke followed me.

“I know you can talk. Please, stop ignoring me and acting like I don’t exist.” He pleaded as I turned my back to him while I stared blankly at the counter.

I’m not ignoring you, but I’m trying to imagine you’re not actually here and that this is just a dream.

“Elleya, I’m serious. Every night I tell you everything I’m feeling because you’re the only person who doesn’t judge me but I can’t handle being the only one to speak. I mean—I want to be your friend, but we can’t do that if you constantly avoid me.” He went on and I felt my grip on the edge of the counter tighten.

I don’t want to be your friend.

I don’t want to be your friend.

I don’t want anything.

“And you can push me away day after day, but I’m not going to stop, at least not yet.” He fell silent for a few moments and leaned against the counter opposite of me. I heard him let out a sigh of frustration. Honestly, he wasn’t the only one who was feeling such a way.

I wanted him to leave and I wanted to get away, but I couldn’t because he wasn’t going to give up. He needed to give up for the sake of his far too big of a heart. “I know you don’t want to talk to me but you really should. You can’t spend the rest of your life pretending people don’t exist. I’m right here in front of you and you’re not—”

“Shut up! Just shut up!” The words slipped from mouth unexpectedly. At this point I was facing Luke, my eyes locked with his. I had never really looked into his eyes like so, but I saw something in them that scared me. And suddenly, my heart felt as if it was slamming against my chest and my head was becoming crowded. All the while, Luke just stood there staring at me, a hurt expression slowly creeping upon his face.

“I’m sorry…” He finally broke the agonizing silence between us. I bit down on my lip and redirected my attention to the floor. “Elleya…I-I’m not saying you need to speak to me right away, but I feel like you should at some point. We see each other basically every day and honestly, it’s become a habit for me. I just—feel like I’m missing part of you. You listen but you never respond. I’m not even asking for advice, I’m just asking for someone to talk to.”

This is wrong.

This is all wrong.

You’re wrong.

I’m wrong.

This world is wrong.

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

“Leave.”

Luke’s expression became filled with guilt and and a frown soon overtook his face, only causing me to feel guilt, myself.

“Okay…I uhm, I’ll be at the beach at midnight. If you don’t want to see me I’ll understand.” He said and left me in the kitchen speechless. When I hear the front door shut I sprinted over to my notebook and flipped it open to the page where I had drawn a black box. My mind began to pound again and already tears brimmed the edge of my eyes. I suck in a sharp, deep breath using every bit of strength I had to avoid letting those tears escape.

I stood up and back up against the wall, taking more and more breaths. They soon became quick and hasty and I sat there on the floor trying desperately to get my breathing under control.

With the need to take my mind off my unsteady breaths, I grab a pen from my room and open my notebook to the next blank page.

Stupid. Stupid. Wrong. Wrong.

Don’t fall into the trap. Stay up. Stay away. Go away. Get away. Leave leave leave leave.

I got so caught up into the words I was scribbling into the notebook that I didn’t realize I was sobbing. Each tear stained the thin paper, some even distorting the words inked onto it.

He’s wrong. You’re wrong. She was wrong. He was wrong. The world is wrong. Wrong wrong wrong wrong. Stop. STOP.

I shut my eyes and dropped my pen on the notebook. My breath soon quieted, but it remained shaky and the pounding in my head ceased while my heart rate relaxed. I swallowed the lump in my throat and stood up from the table. But before I could escape to my room the front door opened and I froze in place.

“Hey, El—are you crying?” She asked slowly.

“Was…” I mumbled under my breath.

“Did Luke stop by?” I nodded. At first I just stared at the ground blankly but within a second of hearing her, my eyes widen. I snap my head up and send her a glare.

“Did you know he was going to stop by?”

“Yeah, I was just trying to—”

“You set it up didn’t you? You gave him my address thinking that he’d be good for me didn’t you?” I begin to become agitated again. It only worsened when she doesn’t respond. “Didn’t you?!” I screamed.

“I did, but I was just—”

“Shut up! I don’t want to hear it! For once can you not meddle in my life?!”

“I’m sorry El, I—”

“Don’t call me that! Don’t ever call me that!” I snapped before running straight into my room, wasting no time in locking the door behind me. Katelyn attempted to knock on my doors but I didn’t dare open it. After she gave up, I walked over to my bed and sat down.

You’re wrong. You’re so so wrong.  


continue to chapter seven

I’ve just created a second furry “character”

I really do like to get lost in my own mind where furries live freely. So it was only a matter of time before I decided to bring in more people who are regularly in Midnights life. So it’s official, Midnight has a flat-mate. Who’s interested in seeing him? (oh and to everyone who’s wanting more of the rainbow zebra himself, I’m working on it. Please be patient.)

I’ve got a free hour or two, send me a number and I’ll write the next five sentences.

If I get any once I’m in bed, I’ll work on them tomorrow or something :)

1. “Come over here and make me.”

2. “Have you lost your damn mind!?”

3. “Please, don’t leave.”

4. “Do you…well…I mean…I could give you a massage?”

5. “Wait a minute. Are you jealous?”

6. “Is there a reason you’re naked in my bed?”“I almost lost you.”

7. “Wanna bet?”

8. “Don’t you ever do that again!”

9. “Teach me how to play?”

10. “Don’t you dare throw that snowba-, goddammit!”

11. “I think we need to talk.”

12. “Kiss me.”

13 “Hey, I’m with you, okay? Always.”

14. “So, I found this waterfall…”

15. “It could be worse.”

16. “Looks like we’ll be trapped for a while…”

17. “This is without a doubt the stupidest plan you’ve ever had. Of course I’m in.”

18. “The paint’s supposed to go where?”

19. “You need to wake up because I can’t do this without you.”

20. “We’re in the middle of a thunderstorm and you wanna stop and feel the rain?”

21. “I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice.”

22. “Just once.”

23. “You’re the only one I trust to do this.”

24. “I can’t believe you talked me into this.”

25. “I got you a present.”

26. “I’m pregnant.”

27. “Marry me?”

28. “I thought you were dead.”

29. “It’s not what it looks like…”

30. “You lied to me.”

31. “I think I’m in love with you and I’m terrified.”

32. “Please don’t do this.”

33. “If you keep looking at me like that we won’t make it to a bed.”

34. “You heard me. Take. It. Off.”

35. “I wish I could hate you.”

36. “Wanna dance?”

37. “You fainted…straight into my arms. You know, if you wanted my attention you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”

38. “Hey! I was gonna eat that!”

39. “Have I entered an alternate universe or did you really just crack a smile for me?”

40. “You did all of this for me?”

41. “I swear it was an accident.”

42. “YOU DID WHAT?!”

43. “If you die, I’m gonna kill you.”

44. “Tell me a secret.”

45. “Hey, have you seen the..? Oh.”

46. “No one needs to know.”

47. “Boo.”

48. “Well this is awkward…”

Someone who is compatible
with my silences,
with the way I look
in the mornings
and my tired afternoon
eyes. Someone who
needs to and
wants to
untangle this mess of a mind
and get lost in
this world together.
—  here’s to not settling.
Hongbin has a lot of gaps

Hongbin’s hobby is walking. To say it more specifically, it’s “blindly walking”. When he can’t think straight, he’ll take a walk near the dorm while listening to music. When there’s forked road, he’ll just change direction inclining to his emotions. There is no clear destination. “It’s nice as it clears my mind and changes my mood. I can organize the day, and can imagine the future.” The side affect is that you can get lost. He says he, only once, lost his way and got scared, taking the taxi back to the dorm. How can a person be perfect. They must have gaps so that you can easily approach them. Hongbin is a charming man in that aspect.

THE STAR (더 스타) 7월호 (trans cr. yuu-jin)

anonymous asked:

and im here stressing about freshmen yr, got any tips?

yes, i do!!!

  • don’t worry too much… it’s only going to exhaust you
  • don’t stress out if you feel lost or confused bc freshman year is naturally hectic for everyone
  • sleep! sleep!!!! sleep!!!!!!!!!
  • get to know your professors outside of class
  • muster up the courage to build a network of connections
  • first impressions don’t mean shit
  • work as hard as you can bc your efforts truly do pay off
  • keep in mind that your peers are competition but also motivation
  • don’t skip class and sit near the front
  • enroll in some courses outside of your major
  • take advantage of student discounts as much as you can!!!
  • learn how to cook for yourself
FAKE AH CREW AU IDEA

–submitted by theload

Ryan and The Vagabond are two different people, and twin brothers.

Ryan is just a normal guy trying to make his way in the city. He’s a tech nerd and completely unassuming. He’s about as threatening as a lost kitten.

His brother, known throughout the city as The Vagabond and The Mad Mercenary, couldn’t be anymore different than his brother. He’s Ramsey’s attack dog and enjoys fires, explosions, and torture. He’s also fiercely protective of his twin, which is why no one knows Ryan exists.


This is an amazing idea, oh my god.

Now I just want the Vagabond to be out of of town on a job or something, and the Fake AH Crew come across Lost Kitten Ryan (as he will forever be referred to in my mind, thank you very much) and they’re all just ‘oh man, you’re back early!  That’s awesome, get in dude we’re heisting.’

And since the FAHC aren’t the sort to lose time talking things out, Ryan gets whisked away on their latest job, more than a little freaked out because he’s suddenly surrounded by men and women in masks with guns, and they are most certainly not obeying basic traffic laws, not one of them is wearing a seatbelt, and oh god is that a rocket launcher?

They reach the target and they all pile out and next thing Ryan knows he’s standing in front of a flaming building wearing a mask and holding a rocket launcher (and goddamn those things are heavier than they look), and this guy in a suit is asking him if he’d like to ‘do the honours’, and this curly haired guy in glasses is pouting at him like he’d just stolen his last cookie.

Ryan just looks at them, then at the building, and then at the very deadly weapon that he’s pretty sure he should have a permit of some sort just to be allowed to breathe on, and promptly freaks the fuck out.

“Who the fuck are you?  What the fuck is going on?  Is this a kidnapping?  Did I just get kidnapped?  And would somebody please take this stupid thing from me before I drop it and blow myself the fuck up?”

The rest of the crew stare at him for a second before Mother Hen Mode activates, because jesus, did he get some sort of head injury or something?  He really has no idea who we are, what the fuck?  And now they have to figure out how to deal with a freaked out and scared Ryan, which quite honestly they didn’t even know was possible.

I Get Lost in My Mind

The unfamiliar is all around me, closing in with each gasping breath. The air is thin, and tears collect on my cheeks as my eyes grow heavy. Who is this person I was? Who am I becoming? I don’t know where I am anymore. I feel like I’m wearing someone else’s skin. My body has grown weak, my mind even more so. My eyebrows furrow, my soul cries out, my scars tell a story long forgotten but begging to be heard once more.

You say you’re near, but I can’t see you. I can’t feel you. I thought I could, but doubt is as prevalent as fear. I thought I was standing on a rock, but fog has blurred my vision. Nothing’s clear anymore. The fog seeps into my ears and blinds my mind. My thoughts run scattered, searching for the light.

You promised you’d never leave me. you promised. I don’t see, hear, or feel you. But you did promise. Nothing is clear except that one thought. Your promise is what I cling to, it’s what I meditate on - it’s all I can meditate on. You promised. You told me that faith doesn’t rely on senses, but on that impossible seeming knowledge that, no matter what, you said you’d never leave me. 

I was doing everything right. I was walking on your path. But now I see that path leads up a mountain. The fog encircles the peak, which is where I’ve found myself, but it’s too late to turn around. I can no longer see my guide or even my hand in front of my face, but your rope is still taught and securely tied round my waist. I hold onto it, because what else can I do? I walk blindly forward, one foot in front of the other, trusting that you’re still with me.