Robron fandom ramble
I’ve been feeling a little overwhelmed with the Robron / Emmerdale fandom lately. It’s like I’m actually overwhelmed by how many talented people we have in this fandom (not necessarily in a bad way - it’s a good problem to have, really) - it’s like nothing I’ve ever really seen before.
My previous fandom was a lot smaller, and while there were many great people within it once upon a time, there weren’t many “voices”. There were probably only a handful of people who actually spoke about stuff (myself included), and everyone who did speak had pretty specific styles and voices and each of us seemed to have a role, which balanced things out. There was something for everyone, really, and the fact that there were so few of us who actually had things to say made it all so manageable, if that makes sense.
With this fandom it’s different. There are SO MANY people here, and so many who are just…..amazing. I don’t feel like there are any “big names”, or fandom “celebs” - I feel like there are too many amazingly talented people for those kinds of labels.
There are the people that make insane gifs and edits and artwork, there are the people that write beautiful fanfic and headcanons and meta and some wonderful freaks of nature who can do all of those things. There are those that theorise and can look back over episodes with such care and attention, there are those that speculate and are positive and level-headed and those who, even when having a total fangirl moment writing all in capital letters freaking the fuck out, can still write so wonderfully, can put a point across so beautifully, without even trying.
Whether it’s just a small text post with just one little paragraph (or even one sentence!) or a huge essay about Aaron or Robert or their relationship or the show in general, the level of talent displayed in this fandom literally blows my fucking mind.
It is a privilege to be a part of, but at the same time it makes me question my place here, it makes me feel like a drop in the ocean, it makes me a little insecure, because in my old fandom I was one of a few, my voice was loud because nobody was really shouting with me, but now I don’t really have a role, there are people far more talented than me, and sometimes I think of something to say but I see someone has said the same thing, albeit in a much briefer, purer, simpler yet wonderful way, or someone has said it with far more depth and beauty than I feel I could ever convey, and it makes me feel a little insignificant, which is hard when coming from a fandom where, for some time, I was considered quite significant.
And I know these are my own insecurities, my own paranoia, and it’s not a competition, and nobody has ever done anything to make me feel this way; if anything, people have been nothing but lovely, kind and encouraging towards me, people have been supportive or things I have written (actually, I have also been totally overwhelmed by how well-received some things I have written have been), and I feel like I’ve made some pretty great fandom-pals here, on all kinds of levels; I adore that one minute someone can be having a silly little “war” over a ship name, and the next they can be writing something serious and beautifully poetic, that we can all go from daft and fun and fangirly one minute to serious and mature essay-writers the next.
It’s amazing. I adore how versatile everyone is. I love how talented everyone is. Sometimes I can only sit back in awe, scroll through my dash and reblog the living crap out of all of these epic posts, whether they’re a funny little text/gif post or a mammoth essay about where a storyline is going, or a beautifully put together gif-set or an amazing piece of art.
Sometimes it actually BLOWS MY MIND. And as I said before, it’s like nothing I’ve ever experienced in any fandom I have ever been in.
I was on the fringes of the Robron/Emmerdale fandom from the very start, as I’ve been on tumblr since 2010 (I DON’T KNOW HOW EITHER) and would search #Emmerdale now and then to see if there was anything (answer: there was always literally nothing until Robron was born). It took a while for me to properly throw myself into the fandom myself and use my own voice; for so long I was just a reblogger, who contributed nothing of my own (and there is nothing wrong with that, fans/fandom members like that are just as valid) - I’m someone who has never liked to spread myself too thin and at the time I was clinging to my old fandom and still trying to make an effort within that, even though it was dying and I wasn’t particularly happy there, but I’m loyal to a fault and it took me a while to let go.
And honestly, falling deeply into this fandom, just becoming brave enough to use my voice and say what I wanted to say about characters and a show I have loved for more than a decade, was the best thing I have done in recent years. At first I felt out of place; all the fans seemed really new (which I thought was amazing but also a little intimidating) and I was genuinely insecure that people wouldn’t like me because I’d been around the show long before Robron (in hindsight I could see that was totally stupid of me to think that, but paranoia/insecurity is a fun thing lmao) but I was amazed at how quickly people welcomed me and even reached out to me and made an effort with me - and how there were plenty of older fans, just like me, too.
And it’s been quite some time now since I’ve been in deep, and I feel like I know so many of you even though not all of us have spoken about too much outside of our amazing show and ship.
What I’m trying to say is, you’re all fucking amazing, and I appreciate every one of you. Whether you’ve been watching the show for 48248 years or 3 months, you’re fucking awesome.
I get overwhelmed because I want to follow everyone, but I’ve always been scared of following too many people and then missing stuff because my dash is too busy. I’ve been on tumblr almost 7 years and I still only follow 394 people (and tbh, I reckon at least a hundred of those are since the Robron fandom was born) - and yet every day it seems like a new name pops up, having written something amazing, and I’m like “where did you spring from?!”, and I have to give them a follow, and it’s like…..WOW.
I could tag a whole bunch of people who I find ridiculously amazingly talented but I’d be here all fucking day, and I couldn’t possibly list everyone, and then I’d feel bad for everyone who I’d missed so….I won’t.
So as arse-kissy as this post might sound, I just want to say a giant THANK YOU to everyone who contributes to this fandom, on any scale, in any capacity….thank you. And thank you to those that follow me too; it makes me feel genuinely proud and I know it’s something I really need to hang on to when I’m feeling down on myself. All your kind words mean more to me than I could ever properly express and I need to hold onto that forever because sometimes I really, really need it.
So…..there were are. Keep doing what you’re all doing. Know that even if I give your post a reblog without saying anything too profound in response, whether in a reply or a message or even a tag (writing stuff in tags on reblogs to someone’s post is so important!!), just know it’s because I’m probably just feeling overwhelmed by how fucking awesome I think you are.
I have no idea where this has come from really, apart from this is just how I’ve been feeling lately, but in a nutshell….I love you. I love all of you. Even if I haven’t agreed with everything you’ve said, I still probably love you. I respect all of you. I’m overwhelmed and intimidated by all of your talents. Thank you for being amazing. KEEP DOING WHAT YOU’RE DOING. Keep this fandom the best fucking fandom I’ve ever been in. Keep spreading the love and the positivity and the excitement, because by god, the next month or so of life in this fandom is going to be WILD and I’m so happy to be here going on this ride with you.
As always with my long posts; if you get to the end, thank you. This only makes me love you all the more.
PEACE AND LOVE