i-could-eat-a-horse

lemonbird  asked:

IMPORTANT QUESTION. Vampires aren't suppose to enter a premise without being invited right? What if a hermit vampire was living in his falling apart old castle and some fuck bought it as a "fixer upper", would the vampire just glitch out on to the lawn or would he be okay since he lived there before?

Okay so this would depend on where you are in the world, and whether or not they had squatters rights (can’t be evicted and can apply for legal ownership of place once they have been there for X amount of years) but I mean, the dude owns the place, even if it is a run down mess he was still there first and there’s probably some ancient land ownership law which can’t be overwritten by modern laws (you find all sorts of weird things are still technically legal cause no one bothered to update the books since 1645) so basically whoever just bought this castle to turn it into a modern fixer upper, congrats, you also just bought yourself a vampire and he’s not going anywhere.

(Also now I kind of want to write this where a family buys it to turn it into a hotel/wedding venue and the kids find the vampire in the attic and he ends up being the weird uncle who gets roped into hilarious wedding related shenanigans?? Like 


“Okay yes fine, you can host weddings here, but registrar only, no religious ones.” 
“But Theolodious, why?”
“Really Sharon, really, do I have to spell it out for you. Really.”

*

“We really should increase the lighting for photographs, what about skylights?”
“No.”
“But—”
“How about I just set all of you on fire while you’re trying to sleep.”

*

“Please, for the love of god, please don’t let people throw confetti or rice, I’m begging you.”

*

“Okay what’s our final head count for the night?”
“107.”
“Are you sure?”
“Did I fucking stutter Steve?”

*

“Uncle Theo, why does the groom have “help me” on the bottom of his shoes, why is everyone laughing?.”
“Because small one, humanity has failed collectively as a species and heteronormativity is a constructed lie designed to oppress over half the population for not conforming to arcane and chauvinistic ideals put in place by dead scholars who have long since turned to dust and have no place influencing modern society.”
“…”
“Permanence is an illusion.”

*

“Madame, flattering as your offer is for a quickie, you’re not my type.”
“What is your type then?” ;) ;) ;)
“O negative.”

*

“Whoo, what a day, I could eat a horse.”
“Same.”
“…”
“…well obviously I’m not going to.”

*

“Theo…are you…are you crying?”
“Yes.”
“You big softie, I never thought someone like you would cry at a wedding.”
“…I’ve lived a long life, Sharron. People come and go, the christening you bless will be the funeral you mourn in less than a century. But people keep saying “I love you”, that has to count for something.”

Lucian Cruisin'

Traveling with the chocobabes


  • Noctis falls out of the car because he decided to sit on the back. You can see Ignis wondering to himself if he should slow down or just keep going
  • Gladio sneezes while you’re asleep in the Regalia. You wake up, panicked, because you think you’re under attack
  • “I could eat a horse,” a man says as you walk into a Crow’s Nest. You realize he is sitting in the booth alone. You lock eyes. He doesn’t look away.
  • Gladio makes you, Prompto, and Noctis hold hands when you guys are in a crowded place so that you don’t get lost or kidnapped again. Ignis affectionately calls it the “Baby Chain”
  • Deepthroat by CupcakKe comes on in the Regalia while Noctis has the AUX cord. He rushes to change the song, but you hold his phone away from him. The Regalia is silent as you all silently judge him.
  • There is a 90% chance that when you walk into the tent, one of the boys will be in the middle of changing. You’re learning more about them than you ever wanted to know. 
  • A baby chocobo has imprinted on Ignis. He tries to lecture you all later that night, but you can’t take him seriously with the baby bird jumping up and down, begging for attention
  • You keep running out of shampoo and conditioner. You think nothing of it until Gladio walks by and you get a whiff of coconut and vanilla. No wonder his hair is so shiny
  • Prompto and Noctis keep stealing your clothes. You try to retaliate by stealing their clothes, but they don’t care. You accept that this is something you have to deal with
  • You’ve run out of Ebony. You’ve run out of off-brand coffee. You’ve even run out of caffinated teas. Ignis is vibrating. His hair is messy, his shirt wrinkled, his eye twitching. For once, you feel more comfortable with Noctis driving
  • Playfully, one of you ask Ignis who his favorite is. With a straight face he says, “I would sell any one of you for a single corn chip.” You know he’s joking, but Noctis’s pout and Gladio’s offended expression make you and Prompto lose it every time
Among The Beasts: Prologue

Reader x Kol Mikaelson

(NOT MY GIF)

*Requested

Synopsis: You and Kol Mikaelson have known each other since you were both kids. Now, being almost a teenager and also a Hale, you have to struggle with the fact you turning into a werewolf without having any clue about what to do. Kol comes up as a sweet best friend and helps you through it. 

A/N: HELLO! I know I’ve sort of disappeared. However, last monday was my high school graduation prom, so I didn’t have any time to update the blog and I am deeply, DEEPLY, sorry. Anyways, back to the story I’m publishing now. I have been requested awhile ago to do a long fiction about Kol and Reader. I thought it was a great idea and I decided to do it. So, it will be kind of a crossover between teen wolf and the originals. I truly hope you like it. This is just a introductory part. And I know I talk too much. hahaha :)

Word Count: 1637

[11th century]

“Kol, where are you? Please, don’t leave me all alone here!” A girl cried, running around in the woods. “I mean it!”

The twelve year old, knowing she would not get a solid answer, just sat against a tall and strong tree. Warm tears rolled down her face as she hugged her own knees, providing the realisation of how cold her own hands were; aside the obvious shaking.

Playing hide and seek was a bad idea, she thought, feeling helpless. Kol was the girl’s best friend and was perfectly aware over the extension of her loathing towards the merely concept of being alone. Especially in the woods, where her father warned her she should be extra careful. It was the burden of being a Hale: to always live hidden and to always be careful.

“Can’t you be nice to me?” Once more her high pitched voice yelled. “You are supposed to be my friend. Best friend. Answer me!”

“You’re no fun, Elizabeth.” A voice came out from between two other trees, making she jump, scared. “We come here everyday to play and you’re still scared I’m going to leave you.“

“That’s because you always hide so well. I never find you!” The girl shook her head. “Also, one of these days you will, once I become…”

“A wolf?“

Mary Elizabeth nodded her head, lowering her eyesight. Kol chuckled and walked towards her, cupping one of her cheeks and lifting her chin in order for the girl to look at him. She had puffy and red eyes from the crying. At that sight, he felt something inside him break. It was awful to look at her like that. Knowing she was hurt and scared. The young Mikaelson wanted to keep her safe and far way from her family problems. Like a best friend should do.

“Listen to me, please.” The boy said, firmly. “I don’t care about your past or what you will become in the future.”

“It’s not that and you know it. Honestly, I’m only scared that one day I might feel the urge to hurt you.”

Kol sighed, pulling Elizabeth into a tight hug. She instantaneously wrapped her arms around his waist, feeling the boy’s soft squeeze. He rested his head on hers, her scent invading his nostrils. Even though it was awkward, as boys and girls usually tend to not get along when young, they loved every minute they spent together.

That moment, especially, felt endless. Both of them under the sunset, feeling their skin’s warmth… Perhaps it was right that second they had fallen in love with each other for good.

“You won’t.” He said, his voice muffled by her hair.

“Excuse me?”

"Hurt me.”

“You can’t possibly know that…”

Kol placed two of his fingers on her mouth, not allowing the girl to finish the sentence. Mary Elizabeth could be very pessimistic when she wanted to be and he hated that. A smug grin curved his lips until, suddenly, he felt the tip of her tongue against his skin. A disgusted glare showed up on his eyes, while she laughed out loud.

“Better now?”

“All better. It’s always amusing to see you like that.”

“I’m glad you’re happy.” Kol said, sarcastically.

Eventually, he caved in and joined her, chuckling.

“It’s getting dark. How about we go home, Lizzie?”

“Yes!” She placed a hand on her stomach. “Oh, Lord, I’m starving.”

“Me too! I feel like I could eat a horse.”

“And, since you’re my best friend, we could share this horse.”

“No way! It’s my food.”

“Alright, Mr. ‘It’s my food’.”

They giggled and started to walk home.

Since the village they lived was bit far from where they were, night fell before Elizabeth and Kol got home. The sky was beautifully clear, which allowed them to appreciate the pale light coming from the moon. Definitely a moment they would remember for the rest of their lives, as they would perceive later on.

“Kol, can I ask you a question?”

“Sure.”

“Why did you become friends with me?”

“You were the prettiest little four year old I had ever seen.” She giggled, looking away. “I mean it!”

“Don’t play dumb with me. I am a Hale, sure your parents did not want their son hanging out with my kind.”

“I’m pretty sure they don’t know. But again, I don’t give a shit. Soon we’re old enough… I don’t know. Maybe we could leave this place.”

“Of course!” She said undoubtedly. “And don’t you dare leave me behind.”

“I don’t think I made myself clear: you’re stuck with me.”

“Don’t make those kind of promises. You’re thirteen. I bet when you’re older, you get yourself a girlfriend and forget all about me.”

Kol frowned and then stopped walking.

“Why are you saying that?”

“Well… It’s true that you’ll probably get a girlfriend. But I was joking about the part where you leave me. It doesn’t have to be like that.”

“I wouldn’t… Never… I mean… Damn it. I just want you to know I like you. And no other girl will ever take your place.”

Mary Elizabeth narrowed her eyes and gave him a small nod. She got confused by his words, but, somehow, it made her heart warmer. It was good to know he liked her just as much as she liked him.

“Promise you will be with me? No matter what?”

“Yes, Kol. I promise.”

“What if you find a boyfriend?”

“I guess I feel the same way you do.” Her voice was unsure, for they never had such type of talk. “Let’s no worry about this now, okay?”

“Right. We don’t have time, anyway. Your mum is already waiting by the door.”

“Wait… Correct me if I’m wrong, but it isn’t you mum there as well?”

“Huh? What is she doing here?”

Kol furrowed his eyebrows as she pulled him to a bush, in order to hide and listen to what the women were talking. The girl had so many unresolved questions about what she was and her parents would not say anything. All she knew was that her older brothers became wolves and she would be one herself, in the future.

“What are you doing?”

“Well, remember what I said about being fully aware of what I am?”

“Yes.” He mumbled, trying to keep himself hidden.

“Well, I lied.”

“What?”

“Shut up, I’ll explain later.”

Kol’s complaints were muffled by her hand, which gave her an opening to concentrate. A few months earlier Elizabeth started to change. Sounds became louder and her sight improved so much she could see miles and miles away from where she stood. Also her reflexes were faster. The healing quickly was a thing as well. According to her brothers, that was normal. First those stuff, then, on the full moon after her thirteenth birthday, she would turn.

Are you sure Kol is not here?

Yes, I am. But Mary Elizabeth isn’t here too. They’re probably playing in the woods.”

Oh, well then. If he comes here, send him home immediately.

Are you afraid my family will do your son any harm?

Not your family, your daughter. Do you even know what she is? What she’ll become?”

You don’t have to worry about that. My Elizabeth is a sweet girl, she could never do anything to anyone. No matter what you say she’ll become.”

If you believe so…

I do.

Very well. I must leave now. Send him home.

Then the Mikaelson matriarch left and Mary Elizabeth sighed, frustrated. She desperately wanted to understand, go deep within her origins. Knowing she had failed one more time to figure out made an urge to hit something come up, which induced the girl to close her eyes and take a relaxing breath. Only to keep it together.

“Care to let me know what the hell just happened?”

“It’s complicated.” She shook her head. “I mean… These things are all new to me. And I so don’t understand it. Yet, nobody is able to explain what  is going on with me.”

“I don’t get it.”

“The wolf part of me is surfacing. I’m pretty sure my change will occur soon.”

Kol looked confused.

“Why didn’t you tell me that?”

“I was scared. So much was happening… Also, I didn’t want to be worry you.”

He stood up, cleaning the dust on his trousers and started to move towards the village again, obviously mad. She huffed, rolling her eyes and running to catch up with him. Even though Kol understood why she had hidden that, he still wished she would have told him. After all, they were best friends.

“Wait up!”

“You don’t trust me.” The boy said, almost snarling.

“I do. I do! But I didn’t want to bother you before I was sure… Before I freaking know what I am.” Elizabeth grasped his arm and captured his eyesight with hers. “That’s why I was so preoccupied with you. I don’t even know what is going to happen after I turn thirteen.”

“Well, you have to be damn sure I’ll be with you. I told you I don’t care.”

“Then let’s forget about this and go home.”

Hale used the five minutes left to arrive their homes to explain her subtle changes. Her friend looked stunned by it. Kol saw himself wishing to be like her. Perhaps not a wolf, but definitely something just as powerful.

“I guess this is where I stay.” The girl stated, biting her lower lip.

“Will we see each other again tomorrow?”

“Like we do it every day.”

“OK, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“You will.”

Kol, then, leant in and kissed her right cheek, which made the girl blush, embarrassed. He whispered goodbye and left, a cocky smile shining on his face. This time more confident than ever about his future.

Secret Love Song // Ten Chittaphon

-

the prompt: I want to request a fluffy story with Ten from NCT. I would like him to fall in love with his international dance partner, as he practice for a surprise stage for a show. I hope you can make it really fluffy!

words: 2662

category: fluff

author note: the title makes his sound angsty but actually I had no idea how to title it so… I hope this is fluffy enough idk. i didn’t make it too relationship-y since they’ve only known each other a few weeks. but ten is my smol ultimate bias wrecker and i lov him.

- destinee

Originally posted by nakamotens


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im so tired i could eat a horse I identify as offends and this horses me homestuck davestrider jadeharley roselalonde johnegbert dirkstrider jakeenglish roxylalonde janecrocker karkat aradia tavros sollux nepeta kanaya terezi vriska equius gamzee eridan feferi gamtav gamkar solkat rosemary erisol hiveswap davejade davekat 

Funny Gamtav Memes of 2017 on SIZZLE | Erisol

Horses, Memes, and Horse: a mpregbert im so tired i could eat a 

Coercion - 13

@coveofmemories@reiding-and-writing@myxomatosis-s@skeletoresinthebasement@passionate-hedgehog@camigt1999@eideticenticement@ultrarebelheart@remember-me-forever-silent-angel@mishamgos@matthewgublers@tinyplanet-explorers​  

You are just about to start your new job at the BAU after years of working to get there, when a man you don’t know approaches you with an evil plan and knowledge of every sordid detail of your past. What will you do? Will you give into the man’s demands? Or will you be able to find another way out?

                                                              —-

A gasp ripped through your chest as your eyes popped open. “It’s okay. You’re okay,” Emily said, placing her hand on your arm. “You’re okay.”

Frantically, you looked around the room. Everyone was there, looks of relief painting their tired faces – in stark contrast to yours. Last you remembered, you were cold, warm blood seeping from the hole in what was apparently your arm.

When you glanced to the side, you caught sight of the white bandage. Underneath, you saw a faint tinge of red. “How bad was it?” you asked, placing your hand over the bandage.

“The bullet nicked your brachial artery,” Hotch said, pushing off of the wall and walking toward your side. “You lost a lot of blood, but they patched you up in surgery.”

You allowed your hand to float off of your arm and fall to your side. “Ashton,” you exclaimed, your eyes widening in recognition. “What happened to Ashton?”

“In custody.” Rossi smiled in your direction from his chair in the corner of the room. “Awaiting transport back to the states with us.”

You took a deep breath in. First, you smiled, sighing heavily as what felt like the weight of the world falling off your shoulders. But then you clutched at your throat, the tears stinging the corners of your eyes as you tried to take a deep breath. “Would you guys mind giving me a moment alone?” you asked shakily. They were apprehensive, considering the last time you were alone in a hospital, you had to be watched in order to not take your own life, but when you asked a second time, they agreed.

Slowly but surely, they filed out of the room. The shaking breaths inside you threatened to barge their way out, but you held them in. Spencer was the last one out. He nodded in your direction, the corners of his mouth turning upward as he closed the blinds on his way out. He knew what was coming and knew you wanted privacy to do it 

With the door closed and the blinds shuttered, you let it all out. You pulled your hospital gown up to muffle your screams and cries. Everyone knew what was happening, but you didn’t want the entire hospital hearing you. It was over. He was caught. You could finally start to heal. 

The tears that had pricked at your eyes streamed like hot lava down the sides of your face. Over and over again, you wiped them off, feeling them burn your skin, but they just kept flowing. “Oh my god,” you sobbed out loud.  “It’s over. It’s finally over.” You smiled to yourself, kicking up and down like a child on Christmas morning. When you moved, it rustled your arm, causing a dull pain to emanate its way up your skull, but you didn’t care. You could get into therapy again. You could make amends with your friends. It was finally okay to start that.

For another few minutes, you allowed everything that had been building up over the past month to escape you. Everything hurt. Your body, the tears, every negative emotion you’d had for weeks, but it was okay; you were cleansing your body of the past, and shortly, you had exhausted yourself into some much needed sleep.

It was another two hours before you woke from your cry fest. Again, when you awoke, the team was there, having let themselves back in after you’d fallen asleep.  “Hey,” Spencer said softly, “You’re gonna be discharged tomorrow.”

When you got back, Ashton was going to be questioned. “Hotch,” you said. “Can I-?” 

“Yes,” he said without missing a beat. “We’ll be watching outside, but yes.”

The first genuine smile you’d cracked in ages spread across your face. “I’ve got lots of questions.”

A small chuckle resounded from the rest of your team and for a few moments you just reveled in what you assumed was a feeling of peace – contentment. “Hey guys,” Morgan said, turning around to the rest of the team. “Mind if I have a moment alone with Y/N?”

Well, that was nerve-wracking. What could he want to talk to you about? Spencer must’ve noticed the apprehension on your face, because he shot you a glance. “You’re not gonna kill her, are you Morgan?” 

He chuckled. “No, I’m not. I just wanna talk.”

You gave everyone a nod that it was okay to leave, so they did. The tension of not knowing what he wanted to say was weighing heavily on you, so you decided to be the one to break the ice. “So, what’s up, Derek?”

He swallowed hard. “Why did you jump in front of me?” 

In his mind, it must’ve seemed like an honest question, but to you it was so simple. “Because, Derek, after everything that’s happened, the thing’s I’ve done, the circumstances that have befallen me, this team, through it all, I’ve loved you all. I mean it when I say that I was put in a bad position. I chose Spencer because I was…I am in love with him, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t, that I don’t, love every single one of you. I saw you about to get shot, so I jumped. Because I care.” After a few moments of thick silence, you looked up again. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure,” he said. “What is it?” 

“What would you have done in my shoes?”

A small huff of air escaped his nose as he contemplated your question. More accurately, he tried to form the right words. “If I came where you came from, and was given the ultimatum that you were given, I would’ve chosen Savannah…I’ve been thinking about it…and I think the reason I acted the way I did is because like you, I wouldn’t have thought twice about saving the woman I love. And I think that angers me.”

“Why?”

His eyes opened slightly. “Why? Because I’m an officer of the law. I’m supposed to protect people.”

“But you’re also a man, a husband. You’re almost a father.” You understood what he meant - why he was conflicted, but you were sure in your decision. “Some people make work their lives. Some people make their families their lives. Some people are able to balance both, and you do, but at the end of the day, even though this job in large defines you, you are a husband and father-to-be….just as I was a girlfriend, madly in love with the man of her dreams. Some might have the ability to always do what is right by the law…but honestly, I don’t think I’ve met one of them yet.”

Derek pushed his tongue against his bottom lip. “I just think the fact that I would’ve made the same decision just as quickly angered me. And since you actually did it, that angered me. Because it was so close to home. Like suddenly someone could try and make me decide something so horrific.”

“Can’t make this shit up,” you laughed. It elicited the same response from Derek and he placed his hand on yours. “Do you think you can forgive me? Can you see that this is never what I wanted?”

“I can see it’s never what you wanted,” he said. “And I think I can forgive you. I’m going to be honest with you though, I may end up being snappy now and then.”

Although you hadn’t know him that long, you knew enough from Spencer that Derek was the type to hold a grudge – get a little hostile. “You? Snappy? Noooo.”

“Shut up,” he snickered. A few moments later, he got up from his chair. “I’m gonna go get a cup of coffee, you want anything?”

As you inhaled, you caught the scent of something bready and delicious. “There’s some kind of sandwich I keep smelling and I want it. I haven’t actually felt like eating in a month, so I could eat a horse right now.” 

“That actually sounds good,” he laughed. “I’ll get me one too. Be back.”

“Derek?”

He turned around. “Yea?”

“Thanks. It means a lot to know that we can work on this.” 

With a nod of his head, he turned to leave again, before stopping in the doorway. “Thanks for jumping in front of me. It’s because of you I get to meet my son.”

— 

After devouring the sandwich that Morgan brought back for you, visiting hours were almost over. “You guys should get going,” you said, feeling your own eyes get heavy with much-needed sleep.

“We aren’t going anywhere.” Rossi smirked. “We’ll be outside.”

“Go,” you laughed. “I’m going to be passed the fuck out and there’s no need for you all to sleep in chairs when you could spend the night in a cushy Hong Kong hotel courtesy of the FBI.

Hotch, Rossi, Emily and Morgan decided to take you up on your offer, but Spencer and JJ insisted on staying. “You mind if Y/N and I have a moment, Spence?”

“Sure,” he said, “ I’m gonna go grab some waters in case we need them in the middle of the night, and then I’ll be back.” As Spencer left your hospital room, you looked over at JJ. 

After putting her phone back in her pocket, she huffed and sat at your bedside with a strained smile. “Everything okay?” you asked. You couldn’t be more over the moon, but that didn’t mean everyone else felt the same, especially considering you didn’t just ‘get over’ what happened; it would take work.

“Just got off the phone with Will a few minutes ago…”

“Let me guess, he doesn’t like the fact that you’re staying her tonight…with me…” Will didn’t know you as well as JJ did, so you assumed he’d have an issue with JJ giving you the chance to prove yourself. You didn’t really blame Will for his anger; you’d almost taken away his wife and the mother of his children. Work would be required to mend that relationship too.

JJ sighed heavily. “Yea. He says I shouldn’t trust you. Ever. He’s mad.”

“I get that.”

“Yea,” she laughed. “I do too, but I know you better than he does, and although it’s going to take a lot of work, I believe that you were put in the worst possible position imaginable.”

The tears welled up, but you held them back. “Umm…I know you said baby steps, and I’m cool with that, but can I hug you?” Longingly, you looked over at her. You wanted more than anything to say sorry like this, but you hadn’t touched anyone, except Spencer’s hand the other night, so you felt like you needed to ask. 

With a smile, JJ stood up and leaned over you. Your good arm stretched around her and held her tight. “I’m so sorry, JJ. I’ll do whatever it takes to prove I’m not that person…I promise.”

“Pushing me out of the way and jumping in front of Morgan, which I told Will about by the way, went a good way to proving that,” she said, sitting on the side of your bed. “We’ll work on it.” She reached down and grabbed your hand, and you moved to the opposite side of the bed so she could sit with you. 

By the time Spencer got back, he smiled. You were fast asleep. And at your side was JJ, asleep as well with her head resting on yours.

MER Week Day 5!

Day 5: Fun With Food
Okay, it was bound to happen eventually! It’s time for your character to have some fun in the kitchen, or perhaps take someone out for a meal, or maybe organise a dinner party. The choice is yours! Whatever happens, they need to have some fun with food!

**Evening!/really really late at night ;.; Its like 1 am and I finally got around to finishing my day 5 contribution to @vorchagirl and @cactuarkitty  MER Week! :D This is a little different, got the whole crew for this one, hope you like it! Also, sorry if this one isn’t as good/TYPOS ITS REALLYLATELOVEYOUTHANKSFORREADINGANDIWILLFIXTHEMLATERTHANKSAGAINOKAYBYE**

Perfect

“I used to know a place we could all fit in… Well, that was until you fell through it.” Kasumi teased as she popped into vision for a moment next to Shepard’s ear between her and Garrus. 

“Ha. Ha. Very funny. Anything else you wanna say while you have the floor, Kasumi? Go on. Get it out” Playful annoyance in her voice.

“I’m still surprised you have good taste in underwear?” Kasumi smiled as she cloaked herself and disappeared from view. 

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anonymous asked:

Is it ok of Platonic with Roadhog and Junkrat? Good and goofy times, also with feels You don't have to take it if you don't want to (sorry for the bother)

You kicked your feet as you took a bite of your sandwich, watching Junkrat pull a firecracker from somewhere. You didn’t know where and you didn’t want to think about it honestly. 

He lit it with a deft hand, quietly dropping it behind Roadhog and turned to you with a finger on his lips. You returned the gesture before taking another bite, shuffling slightly on the counter.

Roadhog leapt in the air as it went off with a large crack, whipping around at the sound of Junkrat’s frantic giggling. He whacked Junkrat on the head, who held his hands to the aching skin.

You zoned out, realising this idyllic interaction between friends would have been unthinkable to you several years ago. You were alone, fighting had become your life and you just wanted to die. It may have been unthinkable then but now you had friends in the two Junkers, one of them was fuming mad at the moment.

“Ey,” Junkrat called out, forgetting about his pain, “What ya thinking about?”

You shook your head, sliding off the counter, “Nothing.”

“I could eat the horse and chase the jockey.” Junkrat said and you groaned, “Let’s go get some Macca’s.”

He practically pulled you behind him, leading you to the fast food restaurant so he could eat an undeniably unhealthy meal.

drowning in dreams

Wincest Writing Challenge, prompt: shifter!Dean
Rating: M | Warnings: mild violence, suicidal thoughts | Length: 3k
Partner: @wideawakeandwriting
Read on AO3

***

Sam stumbles into Rufus’s cabin, more drunk than he should be. The fucking demon was right, he’s alone. It’s only been three days, but each feel like a whiskey-soaked eternity. Tomorrow he’ll search for real, maybe get a witch or a better psychic to help him. If Crowley didn’t lie, and wasn’t that the biggest if of the century, if he didn’t lie then Dean was in purgatory. And for once, Sam’s been procrastinating on research. He’s already urgently looked for ways to get in and out of purgatory when they had a leviathan problem, can’t free them all to maybe, probably not, get Dean back.

He doesn’t get around to researching the next day, curls up with tequila instead.

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Red Queen Week Fic - Day 1

Title: When The Wolf & The Witch Switch
Fandom: Once Upon A Time
Pairing: Red Queen (Ruby/Regina)
Rating: Teen & Up
Warnings: None
Word Count: 2521
Summary: Regina and Ruby find themselves stuck in each others bodies, and learn a lot more about each other in the process. Written for Red Queen Week Day 1 - Opposites

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Regina was used to feeling powerful, but this, this was something else entirely. It felt like there was something twice her size and four times as powerful trapped within her. She felt like a tightly wound coil, just waiting to spring loose. It took so much effort to reign herself in, to not break anything and everything she touched. Just one tiny squeeze and the glass in her hand would shatter. Regina didn’t know how Ruby did it.

Thanks to some kind of spell or curse (she was still having trouble trying to figure out what exactly) she and Ruby had swapped bodies. Regina had been in Ruby’s body for about three hours now, and she had already broken two mugs, one glass, and one plate. She was trying to be extra careful now though. At least Ruby didn’t seem to be faring any better in her body though, that was something.

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The signs as Rap Monster quotes
  • Aries: (while twerking) "something keeps dangling"
  • Taurus: "that shit cray"
  • Gemini: "when you get to eat ramen after feeling really really hungry, that's happiness"
  • Cancer: "what the flower"
  • Leo: "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse. And that horse is Jhope"
  • Virgo: "I'm the best dancer in bangtan"
  • Libra: "I wore his underwear 22 times approximately"
  • Scorpio: "you got no jams"
  • Sagittarius: "if you want something broken I'll break it for you"
  • Capricorn: "I have to talk to my mother about this first"
  • Aquarius: "even my shit smells like jasmine"
  • Pisces: "I didn't choose the thug life. The thug life chose me"