i-can-fill

🙇🏽🙇🏽 -grabs some of the water balloons I bought a few days ago to fuck deijah up and goes to the freezer down stairs. Opens the balloons up as wide as I can filling all of them up with ice and ties them up- its time for a ice fight. Deijah where u at?! @deijah-vu

I’m not religious but I keep praying you’ll change your mind.
I’m not an alcoholic but I keep staring at the bottom of empty bottles and remembering you in my arms.
I’m not a heavy smoker but now I’m smoking a pack every other day so that I can fill my lungs with something other than the space between you and me.
I’m not big on being touched by other people, it’s always made me uncomfortable.
But that was before I felt the touch of fingertips that no longer crave my skin.
it’s scary that people can fall out of love for the same reasons they fell in it.
I don’t think I’ll ever fall out of love with you.

*TRIES NOT TO THINK OF HEADCANONS WHERE IF ROBERT IS LIKE THIS NOW AND ROBERT AND AARON AREN’T EVEN TOGETHER, THEN IMAGINE WHAT HE’LL BE LIKE WHEN HE’S ASKING CHAS FOR AARON’S HAND IN MARRIAGE OR HOW DAMN SINCERE HE WOULD LOOK UP AT THE ALTAR WITH AARON WHILST EMPHASISING EACH AND EVERY WORD OF HIS VOWS*

*DIES WHILST THINKING ABOUT THIS*

To Adrienne de Noailles de Lafayette, Philadelphia, September 12, 1777

I send you a few lines here, dear heart, by some French officers, my friends, who came here with me but have not obtained positions and are returning to France. I shall begin by telling you that I am well, because I must end by telling you that we fought in earnest yesterday, and we were not the victors.  Our Americans, after holding firm for a considerable time, were finally routed. 

While I was trying to rally them, the English honored me with a musket shot which wounded me slightly in the leg. But the wound is nothing, dear heart,  the ball hit neither bone nor nerve, and all I have to do for it to heal is lie on my back for a while –  which puts me in a very bad humor. I hope, dear heart, that you will not worry; on the contrary, you should be even less worried than before because I shall now be out of action for some time. I intend to take good care of myself; you may be sure of that, dear heart.

This battle will, I fear, have unpleasant consequences for America; we must try to repair the damage if we can.  You must have received many letters from me, unless the English are as hostile to my letters as to my legs. I have received only one from you so far and I long for a news.  Farewell; they won’t let me write longer than this. For several days now I have not had time to sleep.  Last night was spent in our retreat and in my journey here, where I am very well cared for.  

Let all my friends know that I am in good health; give a thousand tender respects to Madame D'Ayen, and a thousand complements to my vicomptesse and my sisters.  These officers will leave soon; they will see you - how fortunate they are! 

Good night, dear heart, I love you more than ever.

-Gilbert du Motier, Marquis de Lafayette, writing to his wife, Adrienne, in the aftermath of the Battle of the Brandywine, where he was wounded in the leg. Quoted in Lafayette in the Age of the American Revolution, Selected Letters and Papers, 1776-1790, ed. Stanley Idzerda, 1977.

As the waterfalls continue to drip-
—  I found another reason to dip my pen in ink made from holes I can’t fill with my poems. I found myself lost within your words because you never liked to mix feelings with regrets. I found the water to be calm, but if you swim against the currents don’t be afraid to get a few bruises. I found the ocean to be alarmingly shallow. There’s enough poems in this sea of pity that I can’t die more than a million lifetimes just to see you once again. There’s enough salt in my eyes & my wounds that I might dry up to speak to you soon. If I told you about loving you, would you believe it to be true? There’s a blue appeal to your white paper smile. You always loved to color the sky. Let’s dive into more waterfalls and catch the stars that escapes our dim nights. I know I’ve said it before, but where would I be without your support? My backbone is fragile and I’m weightless in this deep cyan inkwell. Let’s not drown tonight. // @noceurous, thanks for the idea. <3
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Connected to this post


We didn’t know it was witchsona week originally but since it is! I drew more of mine and drew my bro’s for them when they asked and it sorta just bloomed into this whole beautiful thing <33

We’ll probs draw at least one more serious one so if we do that’ll get posted as well B)

Letting You Go

I keep walking until I feel numb 

Not aware of the world around me, or even myself
I can’t feel anything, or maybe I just don’t want to
Because if I do, it would make all of this real
It would make you real
It would make us real
And it would make you leaving real

And maybe I’m just scared
Scared that if I open myself up, tear myself open,
This emptiness inside me would become what completely defines me
Threatening me
Breaking me
Daring me to collapse

And I don’t know if I can fill the void where everything that was once there
Surrounded you
Was made of you
And only you

So I’ll be numb
I’ll be numb to this pain
Numb to the memories
And numb to the sound of your name

I’ll be numb to the point where I can’t even feel my own tears

~Lauren Whitehead

Our Moment In Time.

Our moment in time must surely come,
just you and me in summer rains,
when we hold hands and walk as one,
side by side down country lanes.

On a blanket of leaves on the forest floor,
your eyes on mine as we make love,
no one can pass our woodland door, 
just you and me and the sky above.

Our moment in time, just you and me,
I do not ask, for eternity,
our moment in time, just you and I,
just one moment, as the world sails by. 

And if our wishes do come true,
and of your love I can drink my fill,
the moment I will spend with you,
is the moment when the world stands still.

Ambrose Harte
Scattered Thoughts