i-can't-decide-if-i-like-it

My Current Concern:

*rocking back and forth on the floor* TenSemi or UshiTen?
TENSemi or UshiTEN?!?
TENSEMI OR USHITEN?!?
TENDOU SATORI/SEMI EITA OR USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI/TENDOU SATORI?!?
SOMEBODY TELL ME WHICH ONE IS A BETTER SHIP! IT’S VITAL TO MY FANFIC! BUT I CAN’T DECIDE! AND I’M DYING!!!
*sobs uncontrollably*

The girl of my dreams.

Recently in one of my previous posts I compared Waverly Earp coming out to her sister vs me coming out to mine and Iv decided that I owe you guys abit of a story time.


From a really young age I knew girls never had the same thoughts as I did.

In primary school I always use to hang out with the boys, dress like them and play every sport known to man because I thought it was cool and I could impress the girls.

I loved my hoodies and caps and my mom wouldn’t stop buying me these stupid dresses that weren’t practical cause mom I want to play soccer and I can’t play with this shit.

So my mom would see me leave the house in a dress and when I got to school I would haul my ass to the bathroom praying that no one saw me in this rainbow pile of shit and put on my hoodies. I really hated dresses.

Anyway in year 5 when everyone was dating everyone and Jessica (me) just wanted to play soccer. I didn’t really care about the boys. All I wanted to do was play soccer not only because I love the sport but because this girl who was two years above me called Destiny was like the best thing that could’ve happened to this little lesbian boy child. We became best friends. (Unfortunately she left in year 5 but we’ll get to that part soon)

Due to me living like 45 minutes away from my school my parents decided that they we’re tired of driving me and my sister and decided that I was going to attend a high school about 15 minutes away from where I lived.

Anyway. Fast forward to year 10 in high school. Where I went through the WTF AM I WHY DO I LIKE BOOBIES STAGE. I started playing club for the University. It was a pretty big deal since I was like 15 and all these girls were like double my size and about 5 years older than me. There was a point where I wanted to stop because I felt so intimidated by the teams we would play against and I’m like really fucken short so it didn’t help either.

UNTIL someone really special showed up at a trial for our team one day. I remember the day so clearly. Since we had already been selected for the team my coach said me and a few girls didn’t have to attend trials and we could just sit in and watch.
Me and my really good friend Sam were sitting on the podium talking about our previous game whilst trails had started. We watched how girls were running up and down playing 5s for about 10 minutes until this blond haired girl showed up. I recognized her I just didn’t know where.

After the trials. Everyone including me and Sam walked into the locker rooms where coach had put up the Team sheet with all the names and positions on it.
I scanned it. Yep there was my name Jessica No.9 written next to it (striker). And then I saw it. Destiny with no number yet confirmed.

Jesus Christ did I freeze and die for about 10 seconds. After my mid panic attack I turned around and walked towards my our changing room locker to collect my belongings before my dad picked me up. Maybe it wasn’t her was it. I didn’t know until I turned the corner and there she was. Destiny my year 5 crush who was like the only reason I showed up to soccer. Standing there looking like a god dayum Angel.

Thats when I knew that bitch is so far down the gay brick road that I couldn’t just tap my cleats and ungay myself.

Destiny and I re kindled our best friend relationship that year and I came out to her and she accepted me obvs cause she is like the best thing ever.

At the beginning of this year, i was still in school (year 11) and Destiny had graduated and had decided to stop playing since she wanted to travel abroad in the UK. Before she left she attended a function that our soccer club throws every year.

I met up with Destiny who picked me up at my place since my parents had the car that night. The drive there was pretty quite for some reason which was really odd since we both were/are such talkers.

Due to us being the youngest there by like 3 years , destiny and I missioned up to the roof and watched the people dancing on the open deck and my coach drunk as he was the year before.

We smoked and drank a bottle of Cheap champagne that we nicked from the kitchen about 10 minutes before.

I don’t know how it happens but I was laughing so hard I snorted our champagne onto destiny. #smooth.

I looked towards her and my heart started beating really fast when our eyes connected. She looked at me and like smirked and I melted a little.

I don’t really remember how it happened but one second I was cleaning champagne off her face and the next we were mid eye contact when my drunk ass coach decided to give a speech and was like shouting my name into the crowd. I climbed off the roof leaving Destiny and accepted the “ youngest player award”. I said my goodbyes to her that night since she was leaving the following afternoon.

It’s been about 7 months since I have seen Destiny and well I miss her. I keep replaying that night in my head wishing that I had kissed her and that my coach hadn’t interrupted our near perfect moment.

On Friday the 26th of August 2016, I got a message in our club group saying that she was coming back home at the end of the year.

Let’s hope I can get another chance.

2

Adam Driver and Daisy Ridley demonstrating that size isn’t everything behind the scenes of Star Wars: The Force Awakens (2015)

Bonus:

HONESTLY the new laughing reaper emote just further convinces me that Gabriel is 100% not a serious person and absolutely loves theatrics, and doesn’t really ever expect people to take him seriously whatsoever.

He seems like the kind of person that would pull a prank on someone at the base, and when faced with an angry “WHY?” his only reaction would be to run away with that overly dramatic laugh inbetween fits of unmanly giggling.

4

i’ve been using my baymax phone case more often these days so i thought i’d feature it in a post! 💗 the annoying thing about it is that it kinda blocked the headphone jack, but i rarely listen to music on my phone anymore tbh. i’m going to be changing phones soon so i decided to get some use out of all my phone cases!! i also have 2 midterms next week…….. rip….. 😰

🌸 outfit 1: lace shirt + pink sweater + wide leg pants
❄️ outfit 2: lace shirt + bomber jacket (the store i bought the dress from shut down yesterday?!)

I still can’t believe I was Straight™ for like fourteen years, I look back on it and just ??? How??? Child, did you never see a girl? And nonbinary folks are like legit ethereal deities, how did you survive not knowing you were pansexual how

  • when aaron antagoized neil at the resort by saying “do you take your cues from dead men?” it wasn’t bc he hated neil it was bc he was looking out for andrew
  • and once aaron decides that no neil isn’t trying to fuck with andrew he backs off
  • he still doesn’t like neil but he can tolerate him
  • after all it was neil who made aaron fight for katelyn and it was neil who made the twinyards start to fix things between them
  • so once aaron stops hating neil he respects neil bc how can this tiny child do this??
  • coming to the foxes a total mess and ending the year securing vice captain
  • but anyway aaron doesn’t mind neil so much anymore
  • and over time aaron and neil bond over things
  • like for example neither of them understands how andrew can eat so much sugar like “honestly andrew where does it go”
  • “don’t you get sick”
  • and once neil mistook aaron for andrew
  • like it was early in the morning and neil was still sleepy and making drinks
  • and he accidentally gave aaron the hot chocolate and andrew the coffee
  • and sat closer to aaron that he did andrew
  • and neil was about to say something when aaron just looked at him with a slightly horrified look and said “aaron”
  • and they didn’t make eye contact for like a week after that
  • but then neil does it again on purpose in front of everyone bc he knows it pisses aaron off and andrew doesn’t care much
  • but it amuses katelyn 
  • so aaron puts up with it bc it makes his girlfriend laugh
  • anyway
  • aaron also helps neil with his math sometimes
  • like we know andrew is smart but idk how much he could be
  • but aaron is a Nerd and would be willing to help
  • and they also run together sometimes
  • like its not planned and they don’t mean for it to happen
  • but aaron knows he needs to get faster now that the foxes have made it to the top
  • and he knows he’s a good player but he lacks speed so he decides to go on runs in the morning
  • and one time he runs into neil who is also running and neither of them says anything but they keep running together
  • and end up getting breakfast together 
  • it happens a couple more times before it just becomes a Thing
  • and they go farther and farther start bring back breakfast for the foxes and everyone is like “um.,,thanks”
  • but it’s one of those things no one is allowed to talk about
  • and they just accept this strange new friendship
  • there are times when aaron wants to bring katelyn to the dorms to hang out with the foxes
  • bc as much as he pretends to hate them they’re his family and he wants them to know his bae
  • so a few times he kinda tells neil beforehand so neil can warn andrew to not pull any shit
  • not that he needs to bc andrew has accepted katelyn as a part of aaron’s life
  • but neil will still “ask” andrew to not be a dick and aaron will say  his silent thanks
  • this got out of hand i’m sorry its past midnight

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS WHOLE THING