i-am-scar

i-will-not-be-caged  asked:

There was A LOT of info in that last post!!! Congrats on getting married! Happy Birthday! Make a Thing Go Right sequel?!?!? I missed you and welcome back!

Awww, thank you so much!! <3 We’re doing the big party next year so my family can make it, but going to the courthouse on Halloween (I let my partner pick the date loll). I’m pretty psyched! I’m super in love! I have a really pretty dress! It’s pretty cool! I’ve also been entirely excused from having to wedding plan the event in May because I am emotionally scarred from planning my sister’s wedding, so I just have to, like, show up, which is ALSO GREAT.

And uhhhh ahahahaha oh man, like, when I say “sequel to Make A Thing Go Right” what I mean is around 8,500 words about Bucky Barnes trying to work up the courage to propose to Sam Wilson, only first he has to defeat some Steve Rogers-shaped gorgons?  That’d make a pretty good Ao3 summary, right?  

so I'll tell you


I’ll tell you that I slept all day yesterday because at least my life isn’t mine when I’m not awake


I’ll tell you that the scars on my thighs are getting harder and harder to cover


I’ll tell you that I cried on the floor of the shower yesterday for an hour because tears don’t stain my cheekbones as badly when they melt into  the hot water


I’ll tell you that as the one person that makes me want to be alive, you’re the one person I’m not even sure wants to stay


I’ll tell you that I got so fucking drunk yesterday because I can’t handle anything sober 


I’ll tell you that I have no expectations but hope with all of my heart that you love me back


I’ll tell you that I am tears, dilated pupils, scars and loneliness 


I’ll tell you that I’m everything you shouldn’t want to hold on to, and hope that you hold on anyways

—  the air that i breathe IV - blue-delusion

To love me means also loving to hear all the raging thoughts in my head at one in the morning when all of my frustrations suddenly burst; it also means embracing all the quirkiness wrapped around my entirety like adoring how beautiful the stars up above midnight or how the clouds move in a slow motion to form warriors and knights; it may as well mean coming with me at Mcdonald’s when I crave for some fries and sundae at two in the morning; it’s also defined as listening to my senseless and repetitious stories about my dreams, fantasies and everyday life. To love me means swearing that you would listen to the songs I would tell to you in the middle of the day because I assure you, you’d be hearing from me talking about them from time to time.

Loving someone like me isn’t easy for I am someone scarred badly in the past. My whole system is composed of heartaches, pains, sorrows and miseries—I am imperfectly flawed but that made me who I am. To love me is to embrace those imperfections stitched through my veins. To love me means allowing me to have solitude once in a while since I have these moments that I want to shut my world down from everybody else; I have those dark times that I never wanted to talk to anybody at all and just want to lock myself in my own world. Just give me some time to think, at the end of the day I will come back to you. To love me is to tell me how much you care for me even in the slightest way—I will surely appreciate that even my form of appreciation and gratitude is to tell how corny or annoying you are, but deep down, your words mean a lot and warmed my heart. To love me means staying with me no matter how messy and difficult I could be. All I ever want is someone who will stand right behind me during my darkest and worst moments of my life.

To love me is to tell me your thoughts and opinions about the things I keep on telling you about even they mean nothing to you. To love me is to allow me to grow with you as a being physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.

I am a complicated and difficult person. I am crazy, wild, freak, easily hurt and gullible. So tell me you love me when you only mean it. I don’t have time for some franks or what. I have had enough of heartbreaks in my past. I am aging and all I ever want for now is a stable and long-lasting relationship that would make me choose to stay no matter how many rocks were thrown at us or no matter how turbulent and bumpy the roads may get.

To love me means a little bit of sacrifice. But I can guarantee you that I could make you feel you’re the best person in the world and you didn’t make the wrong choice by choosing me over them. With me, I can make you feel disconnected from the rest of the galaxy. I will surely make tons of efforts for our relationship to keep going and last. It will be a tough ride for the both of us but I can assure you that it will be worth it and filled with so much fun. To love me means needing and wanting me like the way I do to you.

—  redserpent42, To Love Someone Like me
A NONEXHAUSTIVE ANIME RECOMMENDATION LIST

CLASSICS (you’ve probably watched these already):

  • Neon Genesis Evangelion : depression, adolescence & mecha: the anime
  • Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann : depression, adolescence & mecha: the remake
  • Kill La Kill: see above, but with a commentary on fanservice and the anime industry. also main female characters
  • Death Note : morally ambiguous main character kills people, eats potato chips. everyone loses their shit
  • Fullmetal Alchemist (both 2003 and Brotherhood) : 2 brothers fuck shit up, also save the world through alchemy.
  • Cowboy Bebop : guns in space
  • Every Goddamn Ghibli Movie : do it, you weakling. watch them all theyre all good
  • Ghost In The Shell : theres more than just the first movie. watch the other ones. also the tv series. do it. its about being human
  • Yu-Gi-Oh : believe in the power of the fucking cards karen

CLASSICS II (you probably haven’t watched these and it makes me sad):

  • Perfect Blue : the movie black swan tried (and failed) to rip off properly
  • Future Boy Conan : because miyazaki also does tv series
  • Revolutionary Girl Utena : sword lesbian, a lesbian with a sword
  • Oban Star Racers : racing, but in space. half french
  • Mushishi : spirits, in all their contemplative beauty
  • Black Jack (the OVAs are the best but you can watch the rest as well): the original Dr House, with more money and assholery
  • Koi Kaze : quite possibly the only redeemable anime about incest
  • Sherlock Hound: did i mention miyazaki doing great tv series yet

SHONEN (young boys fuck shit up):

  • My Hero Academia : crybaby protagonist turns out to be most loveable character of all time. becomes a cool hero. love him
  • Mob Psycho 100 : a show about a boy who just wants to be good. ONE manifests in your house to physically punch shonen tropes in the face. breathtaking animation. read the manga before tho. trust me
  • Avatar The Last Airbender (& Avatar The Legend Of Korra) : fuck you its anime because i fucking said so. watch it. the story is great and culturally diverse and also cool shit happens
  • Naruto & Naruto Shippuden : whatever you say some arcs were fucking legendary so whenever you want just watch some cool, non-filler shit. every thing after the Pain arc doesnt matter dont watch it
  • Soul Eater: i have no goddamn clue whats going on but it looks cool.
    also spirit vore
  • Hunter x Hunter : young boy adopts new adults in his family, gets killer best friend. literally
  • Keroro Gunsou : alien frogs try to take over the world. it,,,,, doesnt work very well. featuring otaku frog, angry frog, gay fanboy frog, gay nerd frog, alone frog as well as many other things. the humans are also good
  • Wakfu : its. basically french anime. fantasy stuff, it has great animation (especially in the later episodes) and the main villains are fucking incredible. its on netflix and by all that is holy watch it in french with english subs else i will physically manifest in your house and punch you.
  • One Punch Man : ONE tries to mock shonen manga, does it too well
  • Shaman King : the french OP is in my head and I CANT GET IT OUT
  • Black Rock Shooter (OVA + series) : this times its girls fucking shit up, and theyre also crying. it looks amazing

SPORTS ANIME (i dont give a shit about sports but goddamn i love these):

  • Baby Steps : the most realistic and likeable sports anime ever. weak art but great story telling and pacing
  • Haikyuu!! : what even is volleyball. i care about these characters and the animation is fucking phenomenal. the soundtrack is so good. watch it
  • Ping Pong - The Animation : weird-ass art in the best way, great story & characters. cant fucking believe this was achieved on flash
  • Welcome To The Ballroom : n e c k s
  • Hajime No Ippo : punching people and your own FEELINGS
  • Yuri On Ice!!! : gay ice skating. everyone loves quadruples. very nice and sweet. you will care about dogs
  • Akagi: lets just pretend playing mah-jong while using your blood to bet is an actual sport. also known as ‘wow thats a peculiar art style - the anime’

OTHER SHIT I’M TOO LAZY TO CATEGORIZE (but watch them theyre good i promise):

  • Fume Wo Amu : autistic man discovers how to make dictionaries and friends. some sad happens
  • Shouwa Genroku Rakugo Shinjuu : like a greek tragedy, except sadder and directed by gods. incredible animation as well. gr8 storytelling
  • Doukyuusei : a short, sweet love story. the animation style is stunning i fucking love it with all my heart
  • Steins;Gate : time travel bullshit. great direction
  • Journey To Agartha : a movie i tried to get people to watch back when they didnt know who makoto shinkai was yet. pls watch its good
  • Usagi Drop : aka “dont read the manga - the anime”. the fluffiest piece of animation you will ever encounter. a dad dadding his life away
  • Psycho-Pass : great thriller/action show. makes you question morality
  • Uchuu Patrol Luluco : fuck you and your feelings im more important
  • Monster : naoki urasawa Does It Again™
  • Kiznaiver : a deconstruction of drama anime in general, with godlike animation and art. the OP makes me want to cry because its so good
  • Wandering Son : a touching anime about trans kids. read the manga
  • Akagi : just makin sure you watch that one. while youre ahead read the manga too
  • Nichijou : slice of life anime presented in the most hilarious way
  • Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magica : magical girls but with a twist. dont fuckin trust that piece of shit plushie
  • Lupin III : arsène lupin except hes more of a piece of shit than usual
  • Parasyte : i am scarred for life by the things i have seen
  • Jojo’s Bizarre Adventures: whatever the fuck is going on here

thats it for now, i will probably update this in the future when i think of it. these are my opinions and my opinions only im not some kind of anime guru kthx

Important messages in Gerard Way and MCR lyrics

• it’s not love if it’s just fucking
• Don’t ask a lot, and you won’t lose a lot
• We don’t need no shows
• Every night, there’s a chance we can walk away
• Don’t give a damn about the wreck you leave in
• Let’s use our magic powers with the children
• It hurts, but I understand
• Just keep it together somehow
• We’re not just dreamers
• I’m with you
• You’re never facing them alone today
• Take my fucking hand and never be afraid again
• Think happy thoughts
• You are not alone in this
• We’ll go so far
• I’m trying
• We’ll show them all how much we mean
• We’ll meet again
• You’re beautiful!
• We are young and we don’t care
• We’ll love again, we’ll laugh again
• We’ll carry on
• Go and try, you’ll never break me
• I won’t explain or say I’m sorry.
• I’m unashamed, I’m gonna show my scar
• I am not afraid to keep on living
• I am not afraid to walk this world alone
• Come on Angel, don’t you cry
• Let me see your jazz hands
• You’ve got to see what tomorrow brings
• Raise your voice every single time they try to shut your mouth
• You’ve got to be what tomorrow needs
• Ain’t nobody gonna take my life
• Ain’t nobody gonna get the best of me
• Get off the ledge and drop the knife
• I’ll keep you safe tonight
• You can run away with me any time you want
• Sparkle like Bowie in the morning sun
• We are not afraid, and we are not ashamed
• You’ll never fight alone
• The world is ugly, but you’re beautiful to me
• Dry your eyes and start believing
• Never let them take the light behind your eyes
• Just remember you will always shine as bright
• Be strong and hold my hand
• Give me all you’ve got, I can take it
• I’m not ashamed of what I am
• There are so many special things about you

it’s already starting to get uncomfortably warm where I live, so here are some hot weather survival tips to help y’all keep looking effortlessly flawless even when your face feels like it’s melting off
  • You want sweatproof foundation? Add a primer and a setting spray to your makeup routine. e.l.f. has pretty decent ones for really great prices (the primer is like $3-5 depending on the store you go to, and the setting spray is like $3-7), and they’re cruelty-free!
  • You wanna wear a skirt/dress, but your thighs are all chafe-y? Rub some deodorant on the inside of your thighs to help eliminate friction. It may sound weird but it really does help.
  • If you live somewhere that has really humid summers, you can keep your hair from getting too crazy frizzy by using a serum (I use Designline’s Silk Drops, but that one’s a little pricey – OGX has a good one that’s way cheaper and smells like coconut). Squeeze a dime-sized amount into your hand, rub your fingers together, and run it through the length of your hair. If you want to go a step further, you can spray some hairspray into your hand, rub your hands together, and then run your hands over your hair to smooth it down. 
  • BB cream is generally lighter and less cake-y than foundation, and in hot weather it’s less likely to melt off. I haven’t found a good cruelty-free one that’s pale enough for me yet, but Maybelline has a decent one that I used to use.
  • Liquid eyeliner is sweatproof, and the really good ones are even pool-proof. You should also make sure your mascara is waterproof so it won’t run when you sweat.
  • DO NOT SHAVE EVERY DAY. Shaving too often will give you dry skin and razor burn, which is super uncomfortable. You should be shaving every 2-3 days AT THE MOST. Also, use conditioner instead of shaving cream (it’s cheaper and works way better) and apply lotion as soon as you finish shaving.
  • If you’re struggling with sweaty skin and summer acne, try using a face wash, scrub, or mask with activated charcoal in it. It sounds weird, but it really works and is gentle enough for sensitive skin.
  • If your face gets all shiny over the course of the day, you might want to look into getting some blotting sheets (or “oil-absorbing sheets,” as they’re sometimes labeled) to keep in your backpack or purse. You just pat them on your face, and they absorb all the extra oil and help you look more matte and less shiny. You don’t even have to buy special blotting sheets – I had a friend who made her own by just cutting some tissue paper into little squares, and they worked really well! 
  • Dry shampoo is a lifesaver, especially if your hair gets greasy and sweaty during the day. You can buy a cute lil bottle to keep in your purse, and use as needed throughout the day. 
  • Every March/April, Walmart starts selling cheap flip flops for like a dollar a pair. I highly recommend going and buying a pair or two, because it’s honestly never a bad idea to have some cheap flip flops on hand, especially if you go swimming a lot.
  • Coconut oil is your best friend. You can put it on your lips to keep them soft and plump, you can put it in your hair as a deep conditioning treatment, you can use it to soften dry, rough skin like on your elbows and the soles of your feet – just do whatever. You can also substitute it for vegetable oil when you bake cookies or brownies; it tastes better and is better for you. 10/10
  • If you’re insecure about wearing revealing clothing because you have scars/stretch marks/ect., Vitamin E oil is really great for helping them fade. I am very clumsy and scar very easily, and this stuff is a life saver. (And of course, scars and stretch marks are nothing to be ashamed of – I personally think stretch marks are extremely adorable and love mine a lot – but if yours make you uncomfortable you have every right to use a treatment like this to make them less noticeable.)
  • I know you’ve probably already heard this a million times, but YOU NEED TO DRINK WATER. ESPECIALLY WHEN IT’S HOT AND YOU’RE SWEATING. Trust me, dehydration and heat stroke are not fun, you do not wanna go there. Drink whenever you have the chance. And yes, it does have to be water. Soda literally just makes you more dehydrated.
  • If you’re going to go to the beach or pool, go in the late afternoon/evening (like 4:00 p.m. or later). It’ll be way, way less crowded, and the sun will already be starting to chill out, so you have way less of a chance of getting burned.
  • If you DO get sunburned, aloe vera gel can save the day. When I was fourteen I got a sunburn so bad that I couldn’t sleep (because my soft, silky sheets were hurting me when they rubbed my skin) and almost had permanent scarring. My friend brought me some of this stuff and not only did it provide instant pain relief, but my burns healed completely and didn’t scar! 
  • If you are out in the sun and start to feel dizzy, lightheaded, or nauseous, or if you develop a headache, get yourself to a cool, shady place (preferably inside an air-conditioned building) IMMEDIATELY. 
  • DON’T WEAR SANDALS TO A CONCERT, FESTIVAL, OR OTHER OUTDOORS EVENT. TRUST ME. YOUR FEET WILL GET SO DIRTY AND GROSS, IT’S NOT WORTH IT.
  • You can make a really good body scrub by combining sugar, olive oil or honey, and a few drops of lemon juice. You can use it to exfoliate your body or even your face, especially if your skin gets kind of rough during the summer. 
  • I probably sound like such a mom right now, but please don’t forget to sleep this summer. Teens and adults need AT LEAST eight hours a night to function normally, and lack of sleep can lead to heightened anxiety and lack of focus, and can even make you gain or retain weight.
  • Eating is important, too. I know I, for one, sometimes forget to feed myself if someone doesn’t remind me, but it’s important to make sure you’re getting 1200-1600 calories a day at the very least. And obviously you’ll need to eat more on days that you’re walking or exercising a lot, like if you go to a festival or on a hike.  

*planning my next drawing*

“Hum I really need to draw another couple that it’s not hinny.”

“Oh hey i’m drawing a beard”

“Why has this character a scar on his cheek”

“Why has this one freckles on the cheek”

“Hum what if I just change his manbun… WOW the girl now has a pixie that’s cool but”

“Why am I drawing a scar on the forehead now”

“Please control yourself”

“This is not supposed to be hinny”

“Not again”

“Not Hinny”

It’s Hinny.

Word Prompts // Death
  1. “I’m not afraid of death; I just don’t want to be there when it happens.”
  2. “To the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure.”
  3. “Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don’t know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of witherings, of tarnishings.”
  4. “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
  5. Death ends a life, not a relationship.”
  6. “You care so much you feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it.”
  7. “It is the unknown we fear when we look upon death and darkness, nothing more.”
  8. “I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear.”
  9. “ We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that Death will tremble to take us.”
  10. “Deserves it! I daresay he does. Many that live deserve death. And some that die deserve life.”
  11. “I saw myself sitting in the crotch of this fig tree, starving to death, just because I couldn’t make up my mind which of the figs I would choose.”
  12. “I will protect you until you die, and after your death I will still protect you.”
  13. “I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.”
  14. Death must be so beautiful.”
  15. Death is for the dead.
  16. “ To me, Fearless is living in spite of those things that scare you to death.
  17. “ Over and over you play this out, like some ominous dance with death just before dawn. Why? “
  18. “Don’t be afraid of death; be afraid of an unlived life. You don’t have to live forever, you just have to live.”
  19. “Even death has a heart.”
  20. “Cowards die many times before their deaths; The valiant never taste of death but once.”
  21. “The last enemy that shall be destroyed is death.
  22. “I would have chosen death for a chance to tell you the truth, if I could have been assured that death would be my own.”
  23.  “ Last is the door of death. The final resort. Nothing can hurt us after we are dead, or so we have been told.”
  24. “In that moment before I let go, I really had been contemplating my death. I’d come to terms with it and accepted it.
  25. “If death meant just leaving the stage long enough to change costume and come back as a new character…Would you slow down? Or speed up?”
  26. “Ignore those that make you fearful and sad, that degrade you back towards disease and death.”
  27. “ Do you know where the wicked go after death?
  28. “When the self-congratulatory part of the evening is over, maybe we could get back to saving my best friend from being exsanguinated to death?
  29. “You only live twice: Once when you are born; And once when you look death in the face”
  30. “Every life has death and every light has shadow. Be content to stand in the light and let the shadow fall where it will.”
  31. “And O there are days in this life, worth life and worth death.
  32. “No. Even though I’m practically starving to death, he won’t even consider it.
  33. Death is so terribly final, while life is full of possibilities.”
  34. “Sleep, those little slices of death — how I loathe them.”
  35. Death is Peaceful, Life is Harder”
  36. “Life isn’t fair, it’s just fairer than death, that’s all.”
  37. “ There is no drinking after death.
  38. Death is not the opposite of life, but a part of it.”
  39. “I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.”
  40. “Someone who thinks death is the scariest thing doesn’t know a thing about life.”
  41. “Sex is kicking death in the ass while singing.”
  42. Death is no more than passing from one room into another.”
  43. “I am so far from being a pessimist…on the contrary, in spite of my scars, I am tickled to death at life.”
  44. “Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It’s the transition that’s troublesome.”
  45. “People living deeply have no fear of death.
  46. “I don’t want to fade away, I want to flame away - I want my death to be an attraction, a spectacle, a mystery. A work of art.”
  47. “I just want to break that song into pieces and love them all to death.
  48. Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside while still alive. Never surrender.”
  49. “ I would know him in death, at the end of the world.”
  50. “Life is so beautiful that death has fallen in love with it, a jealous, possessive love that grabs at what it can.”
  51. “Fear not death for the sooner we die, the longer we shall be immortal.”
  52. “I may not agree with you, but I will defend to the death your right to make an ass of yourself.”
  53. “I’m not afraid of death. It’s the stake one puts up in order to play the game of life.”
  54. “Stupidity isn’t punishable by death. If it was, there would be a hell of a population drop.”
  55. “Why do people want to pretend that death is sleep? It isn’t. It isn’t.”
  56. “So we drove on toward death through the cooling twilight.”
  57. “The heart dies a slow death, shedding each hope like leaves until one day there are none. No hopes. Nothing remains.”
  58. “There are so many worse things than death. Not to be loved or not to be able to love: that is worse.”
Little witch (Part 7)

Pairings: Peter x reader

Word count: 1 897

Summary: The reader is raised by Hydra but manages to escape after they kill her parents. She is emotionally unstable and can’t control her powers. The Avengers rescue her and give her everything she missed form life and wanted to feel. But would her new found love be enough to extinguish her desire for revenge? What would be the side she would choose to rely on? Will she be ready to face the real her?

A/N: I am so so sorry I’m posting it so late and that this part is so short. I promise to post the next tomorrow morning or at the evening and I’ll try to make it much more interesting ♥ Please tell me what you think and Enjoy :3

Part 1// Part 2// Part 3// Part 4// Part 5// Part 6

Originally posted by koenigreus

“I’ve never thought superheroes can be that-”

“Wild.”, the two teenagers stood at the door of the living room. They had come in the tower after midnight but the people had been still parting hard. Peter and (Y/N) had spent some hours in Peter’s room talking about their past and telling each other jokes until (Y/N) had fallen asleep and Pete had moved her to her room.

“This will take ages to clean.”, the witch complained while looking at the confetti, napkins, glasses, empty bottles on the floor. There was even a spot on the carpet of wine and two others of whiskey or vodka.

“Do not worry Mrs (Y/L/N) and Mr Parker. I usually clean after the parties.”, a deep voice spoke from somewhere. It was Jarvis. At the beginning (Y/N) always jumped at the sound but after some weekends she got kind of used to it. Jarvis was like a friend to her, always helping if had gotten lost or was searching for something.

“No, Jarvis. We will do it this time.”, (Y/N) spoke and asked for some sacks where they could put all the rubbish.

“Yeah, it’s not a problem. Besides that, we’ll spent some time together.”, as Peter said those words, both him and (Y/N) blushed. Last night had changed their relationship. They were more confident around each other, showed how much they admired the other. Yes, it sounded odd. To change your attitude towards somebody just for five or six hours you had spent together. That had surprised and scared our well-known little witch. The past month was like the first years of a baby. She felt to so many things in such a short period that it was hard for her to perceive what had happened. Lately, she had decided just to feel everything rather than rationalizing it.

“I’ve wanted to ask you something since you told us your story. But I’ve never felt comfortable with it…I-um…will it be okay for you to talk about your scar?”, Peter questioned the girl as he put two empty bottles of Jack Daniels in the sack. (Y/N) was slightly surprised by the question. She had never thought somebody would be that interested in it.

“Yeah, go on.”

“Are you ashamed of it?”, the girl froze for a moment. Why would he ask such a thing!? (Y/N) turned around looking at the boy. She met his eyes and saw pure interest and soon regret as he saw her reaction, “I’m sorry, I-I shouldn’t have as-asked that. Forge-forget about it.”, Peter stuttered and turn around shamefaced.

“No, no. It just surprised me. I don’t understand why you would ask me that.”

“I’ve seen you covering it almost all the time but simultaneously you don’t act as though you care if somebody will see it or not. ”

“Oh.”, she exclaimed, “No, I am not ashamed of it.”, she stated and images of her scar appeared in her head. When she had been still in Hydra, she had been allowed to use only one small mirror. Even with it, she had never seen her scar before she had come in the tower. (Y/N) was either too close to death to think about it, or busy with training and moaning from the pain, “The first time I saw it was when I came here. I wasn’t used to mirrors so the big one in my room did surprise me. At first I was passing by but the girl inside me saw an opportunity to show and one day I stood in front of it looking at me, my pale face that was slowly gaining its color, my pale body because of never being exposed under the sun, at my scar that wasn’t covered in blood. I saw myself whole and I did like every part of it. It made me who I am. Even the scar. You may think I was shocked, disgusted, ashamed of it but no. Well, maybe part of me felt sad but I was proud.”, at that time Peter and (Y/N) had sat in the clean part of the sofa. Pete was listening to her in awe. He was amazed by her words and the way she was talking about such a thing that could had caused her nightmares. The girl, on the other hand, was fully immersed in what she was saying. The events she was talking about overwhelmed her letting her feel the same emotions as she had done then, “I am proud of it because it tells my story and reveals who I am. It shows what I’ve been though and that I survived. When I was chained and whiplashed, I felt death. Deep inside I believed that every time was my last. That with the next close of my eyes, the agony would stop. I wanted that, Peter!”, the girl looked at him and he saw the broken in them. The previous night, when they were together, before and after the kiss she was smiling, shining like a star and lighting his way. Now, his star was quenched, “I was at the threshold of giving up. But I didn’t and that’s why I am not ashamed of my scar. It shows how strong I am and I will always be proud I managed to escape this peaceful trap I got myself into.”

For a moment, the boy just stood there not able to say anything. He had lost the ability to talk being too impressed. He had thought he had problems, with his high school troubles and nightly adventures. He was falling for her more and more with every second passing. He wasn’t able to stop it and was happy about it.

“Am I interrupting something?”, somebody asked all of a sudden causing the two teenagers, who were obviously sharing a moment, to jump, “Oh, sorry kids, didn’t want to scare you.”

“Hey, Colson!”, Peter greeted the man in the TV, “How are you?”

“Perfectly good. And by what I see around you, it must have been a rough night, huh?”, the man laughed at his words. Although he was used to seeing his favourite Avengers with hangovers the next morning, he still found their state funny.

“Well, maybe. We weren’t here but for the two of us it was definitely a night to remember.”, (Y/N) smiled and stood take a bottle because it wasn’t letting her see the man.

“Be careful, kids!”, he warned them with a smirk on his baby face, “I don’t want to become a grandpa.”

“You are just like Mr. Stark!”, Peter exclaimed.

“Is there something important, Mr. Colson?”, the girl changed the subject as she wasn’t that comfortable with the previous one.

“I’ve sent some information about a case. Tell Steve and Natasha to check it when they wake up.”, he informed the teenagers in front of him and said a goodbye giving the excuse he was busy. Then the screen went black and the ‘kids’, as Colson had referred to them, were once again alone.

“You know what? I am tired and I want to take a rest. Why don’t we leave this to the others?”, (Y/N) suggested as she put the sack on the floor, “It will be a lesson for them to learn.”

“I agree with you.”

“I’ll be in my room.”, the girl announced without letting Peter suggest a way to spent the time. She knew he would do so and she would had gladly accepted but right now she had something in mind that had to be done. Peter found her behavior odd but gave it to the exhausted statement.

(Y/N) rushed towards her room and once she was inside she turned the key. Something in Colson’s behavior had shown that there was a secret he was keeping. The way he looked for a second towards here and the fact that he gulped nervously was enough for her to understand that the secret was about her. Something had happened and it involved her. She had to know what and why.

“Jarvis, can I ask you for a favor?”, the girl asked as she sat on her bed.

“Yes, my lady, how can I help you?”, his voice echoed through the room. (Y/N) took a deep breath and then spoke

“Can you show me the file Mr. Colson have sent?”, the girl begged that her will would be fulfilled.

“I’m sorry, Mrs. (Y/L/N), but it’s only for Mr. Rogers and Mrs. Romanoff.”

“Jarvis, I need to know about that file. Nobody would know that I have read it.”, the girl stood and looked at one of the camera in the corner of the room. Tony assured her that only Jarvis could turn it on if he thinks someone is in danger, “I will get it eventually but since we are like friends, I am asking you polite. Please, show me the file.”, (Y/N) spoke softly yet firmly. Jarvis, of course, protested for some minutes but finally gave in.

“Here, but only for a second.”, her laptop shined and she saw a file being opened.

The girl sat on the chair and looked at the screen. There were some photos and a document. She decided to first open the photos and then the text explaining them. She clicked on them and the first one made her heart skip a beat. Woods, dead bodies, blood…(Y/N) clicked again and the photo changed. This one wasn’t taken from a distance like the other. It gave a better view on what had happened. She saw a kid laying on the ground dead. He had two, three, four, five holes in his body from bullets. The trees around the body were burnt, the grass too. (Y/N) knew those blonde curls, now having a red liquid in their ends, the pale face and the dark blue eyes that were looking at her. Biting her lip she opened the next photos. There were three more children and one boy around her age. Every one of them was surrounded by the damages their powers had caused. The witch was aware what had happened without even opening the file. However, she did it only to make sure she was wrong. Sadly, her thoughts were real. These kids had been killed by Hydra agents two kilometers away from the base where she had been kept. (Y/N) closed the laptop and turned around on the chair. She positioned her elbows in her knees and buried her head in her hands. Breathing in and out she tried to rationalize what she had seen. Those children weren’t more than 12, except the boy who was 16. Some of them had marks on them with the famous symbol of Hydra. Just like her, they had been marked no matter it was in a different way. She had to do something, she wanted to. Through the tenth years she had spent in the base, other kids had been coming, kidnapped from their parents. Some of them were orphans but others weren’t. They had families, friends, people who loved and adored them. And now? They were dead, lying on the woods where nobody could find them. They were thrown away like rubbish, killed as though they had been wild animals. Rage kept rising in (Y/N)’s body. She felt something that she hadn’t experienced for a month. But this time she didn’t try to stop it.

Part 8

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Zach Imagine #4

Zach being secretly in love with you, his best friend.

A/N : I tried. I hope you enjoy!

-

“You look really pretty today, y/n.” Zach smiles at you in awe. He loves the way you have the effect of taking his breath away even when you’re in sweats and a hoodie with no make up on and a messy bun.

You punch his arm lightly, “Shut up Dempsey.” You get into his car as he drives to the nearest gas station.

-

“Maybe I just wasn’t good enough for him.” You cry onto Zach’s shoulder.

 “Y/N he was a douche, and you are way out of his league. You deserve the world and he couldn’t give it to you and that’s his mistake. ” Zach stroked your hair.

-

“Let’s make a deal Y/N.” Your ears perked and you looked at your best friend, you nodded your head.

“If we both don’t have dates by the winter formal, we’ll go together.” You agreed, little did you know he didn’t try to get a date, and he made sure all his friends kept an eye out for anyone who even thought about asking you to the dance.

-

“Wow,” he breathed as he saw you in your dress.

“You’re not looking too bad yourself, Dempsey,” you chuckled as you and Zach got into his car.

-

“He’s not a good guy, Y/N! He’s not a relationship type.” Zach yelled.

“Maybe I don’t want anymore relationships.”

“I know you Y/N, you’re a nice girl, you’re more committed to relationships than Juliet was committed to Romeo!” 

“Maybe, you don’t know me at all. Have you thought of that?” Zach walked out of her room and slammed the front door. He wasn’t going to say anything he would regret.

-

“How’d your non-relationship thing go?”

“I walked into his room and he was naked, I ran out of his house screaming. I am scarred.”

-

“Zach please talk to me.”

“Not in the mood.”

“I’m your best friend you can tell me anything.”

“You wouldn’t understand.”

“Really? Try me.”

“I’m in love with this girl. In fact, I am so in love with her, it actually hurts because I know she will never feel the same.”

-

“I got you something to get through your AP BIO test!” Zach smiled wide and pulled out a cupholder from monet’s.

“Zach you are a freaking life saver,” You hugged him tight and grabbed your everyday order, hot chocolate with vanilla extract, whip cream, caramel, and sometimes sprinkles.

-

You walked past a bunch of seniors, they whistled and hollered at you. You felt extremely disrespected and uncomfortable. You told Zach about it.

“How many guys were there?”

“How’d they look?”

“Can you describe them?”

“Zach, really, it’s fine.”

“No, it’s not. What if they do it again?”

“They won’t,” You hoped.

-

“Zach I think I like Montgomery.”

“Oh.”

-

“Zach,” She sobbed through the phone.

“Y/N? What’s wrong?”

“He’s cheating on me,” she sobbed harder. 

-

“I’m going to beat your fucking ass Montgomery,” Zach said ready to charge at him. Until Justin pulled him back.

“HEY! HEY! What’s going on here?”

“He’s cheating on Y/N,” anyone could see the steam coming from Zach.

“Jesus, Montgomery. What the fuck is wrong with you?” Justin glares at Montgomery.

“She said she loved me. It’s been only 3 months,” Montgomery scoffed.

“So what? You throw her away because she has feelings?” Zach shoves Montgomery.

“She didn’t put out. Plus we all know how much you’re so in love with her,” he pauses and venomously smirks. “I guess now we both know how it feels to see someone you love ruined.”

Zach punches Montgomery in the face and leaves.

-

“Hey, hey. It’s okay. You’ll be okay, Y/N,” He says as he hugs you, tightly. “He’s dumb. He’s not worth your tears. You’re smart, independent, and a bonus is you’re really beautiful. You’re the most caring person, your smile could light up any room and your laugh? It’s the best song I ever heard. You’re going to find someone, someone who loves you so much and they’ll never purposely hurt you.” 

“Where does a guy like that come along?” 

I’m right here.

2

“I think Revival is just the start. The conversation has definitely turned, and I feel more inspired than ever right now. I have actually been working on new music. It’s always a good thing to push yourself and be challenged. I think as humans that’s the only way we grow. I am happy for the “scars” I have and wouldn’t change them for anything. I feel like I truly have just begun my journey.”

2

3 asks? We’ll give this a try~