Socrates and Freddy Krueger: A Dialogue

The cave was dark, and it was gloomy. It was just as Socrates had envisioned it, though he never imagined he would someday find himself here, in the flesh. The cave was only meant to be a metaphor.

To his left and right were two zoned-out men, drooling from the lips and gazing mindlessly at the wall of the cave before them, whereupon reflected shadows of trees and animals from an unknown light source to their backs.

These men were chained by shackles to their wrists, ankles, torsos, and necks, so as to restrict any movement, though Socrates doubted whether these men would move even if they were capable of it.

Socrates looked upon his own body, where he saw the fresh marks of shackles, but the chains had been removed. Socrates stood. When he was fully erect, Socrates glared down at his two stoic companions.

Socrates: Fear not, my dear friends. I shall now leave this cave, but I will return shortly with the keys to your shackles, and we will walk out of this cave together, as free men.

The prisoners said nothing, nor gave any indication that they had acknowledged Socrates’ words. They continued to stare at the projections on the wall.

Socrates sauntered about the dark and dismal corridors until he came upon a narrow reflection of natural light, which gave him hope. He followed its source, and around the corner this small reflection gave way to a brighter reflection, and a brighter reflection yet around the next corner, and the next. At last, the grand opening to the cave stared brilliantly back at Socrates, emanating out pure white light, a hundred yards in the distance. Socrates wondered if, as his metaphor had inferred, true enlightenment awaited him just beyond the opening of the cave.

In no particular hurry, Socrates walked onward until, about fifty yards out, a dark and mysterious silhouette of a man suddenly materialized at the threshold of the cave.

“Socrates!” the figure exclaimed. “I thought that was you! Come here, my most wise mentor, and we shall discuss things old and new; we shall tell each other all about our time apart.”

Socrates instantly recognized the voice. It was Plato, his most loyal pupil from his lifetime in Athens. Socrates walked onward.

Socrates: My dear Plato, I am beyond excited to see you. Though I fear there is not much to tell, at least on my end. Why, the time I drank the hemlock seems only moments ago, and, unless my memory fails me, this is the first place I have been since.

Socrates was now only fifteen yards away from the figure, which still appeared only as a blackened silhouette.

“How eerie you should say that!” the figure responded. “Why, it has been years since you drank the hemlock! But of course, time has no meaning here. I dare say it, my dear mentor—we have arrived at the world of ideas. Never will we return to the physical world, that wretched place of ignorance, where they sentenced you to die! But you need not worry, most wise Socrates, for the people we have left behind, as I have told them all of your stories! Your dialogues, your wisdom, I have written it all down, and it will survive in the hearts and minds of humankind for thousands of years to come. Have I not made you proud?”

Socrates: Indeed, you have, and I must ask if there is anything I can offer in return for your loyalty?

“Well, there is one thing.”

Socrates: Anything, my dear pupil.

As Socrates uttered these last words the darkened silhouette before him gained color and for the first time Socrates was able to take notice to the man’s features. He could see instantly that the man was not Plato. Plato had been big and burly, with broad shoulders and a deep beard. The man before Socrates now was skinny and of average height, sporting the rather objective fashion faux pas combination of a Christmas sweater and top hat. The man had no facial hair, nor could he, as his face and indeed the entire scope of his skin was badly burned. But perhaps the most striking physical feature of the man was at his fingers, off of which protruded eight long and frightening blades composed of stainless steel, sharp and tough enough to slice through just about any element in the known universe. As far as Socrates could remember, Plato did not have those.

Upon showing his true self to Socrates, the man bellowed a deprived, grizzly laughter, and shouted, in the deepest of voices, “I want your head, bitch!”

Socrates pause, now a mere arm’s length from his daunting guest.

Socrates: Why, hello, my most unusual acquaintance. Do forgive me my blunder; I had mistaken you for an old friend. Though I assure you; I am equally excited to engage in conversation with you.

The man was a bit taken aback by Socrates’ calm and collected response. Then he gathered himself and shouted, “You must not have heard me. I want your head, bitch!” Again he laughed deeply.

Socrates: I must apologize for not responding to your original remark—indeed, I had heard you the first time. You must take no offense; I have grown quite accustomed to more formal greetings, but I can tell now that you are not a man of formalities. So, fret not!, we shall talk about your desire to remove of me my head. Tell, for what purpose would you like my head?

“I will tell you! I want your head because…it would taste great with a sprinkle of parmesan! Ahahaha!”

With his blades, the man took a swipe at Socrates’ neck. Alas, this attempt was not successful, as his claws merely passed through Socrates’ with no effect, as if Socrates were a ghost.

Socrates: Oh dear.

“Damnit! You do not fear me! I only have the power to kill those who fear me—and you do not! How could that be?”

Socrates: Please, do not feel disappointed. It is evident that you are a killer of world-class prestige—I would be foolish to deny you this. Why, everything about you, from your skin to your claws to your deep, devil-like tone, demands a tremendous deal of fear, of which you are surely worthy.

“So fear me!”

Socrates: But alas, my philosophy of fear is such: As mortal beings, fear is at many occasions instrumental to our survival—particularly in escaping from great and deadly creatures, such as the lion, the tiger, and the porcupine. Oh, we mustn’t sleep on the porcupine!

“Then why won’t you fear me? Can’t you tell that I am something much, much more evil than a mere lion? I am what nightmares are made of!”

Socrates: I should say you are! But alas, at least for me, this is your downfall—you are too scary. See, fear is only useful insofar as an escape from the source of the fear is possible. In the case of the porcupine, for example, fear will aid me in my sprints away from such a terrorizing beast, and if I run fast enough, I will escape the agony of its mighty spikes. But in your case, why, it is obvious—there is no escape! I can see, just by gazing upon you, that you are no stranger to killing men of my modest strength, and much beyond. Would it not be futile, my attempt to escape?

“It would be futile! I would catch you immediately and I would devour you! Ahahaha!”

Socrates: So you see, most brutal killer, that in this very particular instance, fear grants me no utility. And thus, I have forgone it.

The man now looked disappointed. He lowered his head. “Well, shit.”

Socrates: But why are you so upset?

“Upset? Why, I am miserable! The kids, they have forgotten me! For nearly three decades I had plagued the minds of the children who live on Elm Street, and, I tell you, I had unlimited reign over their dreams! Those were the golden days. But these days the children are too caught up in their smart phones and their internets to worry about some washed-up psychopathic serial killer. Meanwhile, Jason is out there having the time of his life! Why, at this very moment he’s probably slicing open by the waist some teenage couple who have come to his lake in hopes of a romantic weekend in the wilderness. Oh, how fun it must be for him! It isn’t fair, I tell you!”

Socrates: Perhaps it is not. But as it appears, you and I have all the time in the universe, and so we shall talk this through—whether or not it is indeed fair. Come, we will sit over yonder on those rocks, and we will talk all about your beloved children who reside on this street of elms.

They sat. Socrates’ acquaintance then extended his hand to…

(To be continued…)

Follow @zeezyzach for more of my modern socratic dialogues, written weekly.

An Omnipresent Fate

Anthologia Palatina 7.265, attributed to Plato

I am the tomb of a shipwrecked man;
Opposite me is a farmer’s tomb.
So you see that Death is at hand
For those on sea and land alike.

 Ναυηγοῦ τάφος εἰμί, ὁ δ’ ἀντίον ἐστὶ γεωργοῦ·
     ὡς ἁλὶ καὶ γαίῃ ξυνὸς ὕπεστ’ Ἀίδης.

The Cemetery Entrance, Caspar David Friedrich, ca. 1825

‘I, Plato, am the truth’. Truth is phallogocentric and anti-feminist. Woman is error. When truth becomes woman it becomes unattainable, Kantian – categorically imperative – and Christian – consoling, castrated and castrating. Transcendental, beyond the philosopher’s reach, enigmatic and seductive, this feminine truth gives herself out as castrated by herself and at the same time castrates and masters the master at a distance. At this stage she is both truth and untruth. But because this negative, reactive truth is the negation of phallogocentric truth, it belongs to the restricted economy of phallogocentric truth. At the third stage of this genealogy of truth this double negation is transcended and feminine truth affirms itself as a dionysiac play of artful perspectives in the knowledge that if truth is unknowable it is not consoling or binding, and that 'with the true world we have also abolished the apparent.’ There was no thing (in itself) to castrate, so no loss to lament; 'it had never been’; 'la castration n'a pas lieu.’
—  John Llewelyn, “Anasemiology,” Derrida on the Threshold of Sense

Wouldn’t normally post this here cause Dan and Phil are my dirty little secret pleasure watch. hahaha.

but this was my favourite live show so far and I know nobody cares about other people’s opinions but here goes-

I love how honest Dan is in this live show. I always wondered how he felt about some parts of the Phandom just destroying comments sections of every video he mentions  and all the fans- hanging on to his every action. He also asks about liking many youtubers and dan and phil at the same time. It was a great question… especially seeing how the genre, sense of humour and video styles are very different. Gullible fans. tiring group chat shoutouts, fear of commitments (same)  etc.

The pressure of living up to being entertaining, the nails. 

He did not talk about his fave character in Avatar…fml. 

The youtube terms and conditions drama. He was calm,collected, and amazing as always. He explains things really well. I suppose because he is articulate in the live shows but he really does great explanations. He would’ve made a good lawyer but he’s a great youtuber.

I like when he talks about things he likes and not what the majority asks for. You deliver what the masses need….not what they want. Do I like Frank Ocean? Not my thing…. or maybe it is….IDK… but would I want Dan to tell me about it? Yes! Have I seen the great British bake off…nope… but it is nice to know about stuff. I like seeing people talking about their passions.

All of the koala feels. I loved it. 

Personally, I would love him talking about philosophy more. Not just the existential crisis brand thing but like epistemology and ethics? Kant? Plato? I am sure he has interesting opinions…. Existence of God…. greater purpose?
Of course not everyone’s cuppa tea, tho. 

White privilege, paradigms, and gender biases and stereotypes etc.

Staying hydrated!   

It was refreshing to see him after such a long time! These live shows just let us glimpse into what it would be like to know Dan Howell. To hold a conversation with him.

This broadcast, especially felt a bit more real.

Some people said he was especially sassy. I don’t think he was rude…at all! He beautifully shifted a little bit from the brand and persona he has established. He spoke about the upcoming videos and the process. He was sassy and great and still polite and sweet.

anonymous asked:

Owlie I need help. I never talk about these things but I feel like you'd be able to lift my spirits. I relapsed tonight and usually I feel bad afterwards about it but tonight I just feel in my gut that I deserve all the pain I get. I don't know what to do anymore I feel like I'm slipping away and I dont know whether to let go or hold on. Its so weird because I'm involved in clubs and sports and I have a lot of friends but I feel so alone. I can't talk to anyone and I just hate myself so much.

First thing do not ever, under any circumstances, let go… Thank you for coming to me and not just wallowing alone… I understand that feeling, and the thing with stuff like this is very much mind over matter, but that does take a long time to get a grasp on… & that’s a common thing “A person can be in a crowd of people but feel more alone than ever when they’re lost in there own mind”(it started as someone else’s quote but I couldn’t remember the rest so I improvised, but it means the same thing…) 

What I used to do when I relapsed or if I was lucky enough to catch myself before a relapse, I’d just go and lay in bed, even if you don’t sleep at least you’re safe from yourself… Try to sleep though because things seem to always feel different after a rest… I was numb for a long time, so I guess I didn’t quite ever feel the ‘I deserve this’ part accept when I was in an abusive relationship and he made me feel that way, so I suppose I don’t understand totally, but another thing that could help are quotes, I know it’s not for everyone but they lifted my spirits a lot so here’s a few:

  • • “For what it’s worth: it’s never to late to be who you want to be. I hope you live a life you’re proud of, and if you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start over…” -F. Scott Fitzgerald
  • “When it rains, look for rainbows, when it’s dark, look for stars…” -Unknown
  • “Let go, or be dragged…” -Zen Proverb
  • “Embrace the glorious mess you are…” -Elizabeth Gilbert
  • “It wasn’t a waste of time if you learned something…” -Unknown
  • “The secret to change, is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on embracing the new…” -Socrates
  • “I think therefore I am…” -Plato (I don’t know what this quote really means but it helped me with my anxiety when I was in middle school I think when I came up with this allusion that the world didn’t exist, and everything was just a dream and I don’t know I’m a paranoid schizophrenic so I come up with a lot, haha)
  • “You are beautiful, own it, walk like your hips move mountains…” -Unknown
  • “The journey begins from where you now stand…” -Unknown
  • “Be the lemon I know you can be…” -Gerard Way
  • “Set yourself free from perfection and living in the illusions of a superficial life. Embrace your whole story, and be free…” -Unknown

(Now I don’t know the root of your self injury, so some of these may not apply, but I just went through my saved quotes and here’s a few that inspired me…)

Another thing I actually saved these a while ago just in case I needed them so they aren’t mine, but if you feel like relapsing again here’s a few things that might help:

Some other things that help look up funny pictures/memes, read fan fiction, write fan fiction, read a book, continue talking to me, etc…

Some songs that could help: 

“Sing” -My Chemical Romance

“No Different” -Tonight Alive

“Spotlight (Oh Nostalgia)” -Patrick Stump

“All of Me” -John Legend

“Break the Fall” -Laura Welsh

“Tenerife Sea” -Ed Sheeran

“I Don’t Care” -Fall Out Boy

“Noise” -Colton Dixon

“This is Who I am” -Colton Dixon

“Faithless” -Black Veil Brides

“Otherside” -Macklemore & Ryan Lewis (This one can actually be quite depressing so I don’t recommend listening to it when you’re sad unless you’re looking to know your not the only one that feels a certain way[it’s about substance abuse so it helped me, but that might not apply to you so you can disregard this one])

“Hypnotic” -Zella Day (not about this, but it’s my favorite song right now so it’s fun if you want to jam your troubles away…)

(I recommend singing with all the power in your lungs along with them for the best results…) ^_^

And to finish off(I just happened to have a photo for this too)

Not putting a read more link cause some other people might need these things also, again the photos are not mine, but I do love you all, & thank you for coming to me, young sparrow, if I didn’t say that already… =-{ )