i-am-in-love-with-you

I am in Love with You.

Mon Amour,

Do you remember the first time i said “ I like you”?
It was also the first time i kissed you on your cheek…
Do you remember the first time i said “ i like -like you”?
It was the time you spelt my name with shells at the beach…

Do you remember all these cute little random things you do for me?
Like sending me a bunch of flowers, with cute little notes… just because…
Taking me to a library..while you watch me read…
Or the Cat Cafe… when the words slipped through my mouth…
And i said “ I love you”…….It was the first time i said it to you….i said it out loud
I swear i tried not to give in.. i swear it wasn’t suppose to be near a cat’s litter box and strangers all around..but how was i supposed to stop myself from not letting you know how i feel…how you made me feel…while you tried to be a part of me…

Do you remember that time, when you caught a flight and stood below my workplace with flowers in your hand and your backpack on your shoulders, and these notes on a blank paper you kept flipping that said you’re sorry..there was music playing in the background…
I was standing  dumbstruck, not believing my eyes…
Tell me how is a girl to not forgive you, when you try and enact an entire scene from a song video by her favourite singer…How?

Do you remember the time we were arguing, and you said my hair smelt great..
Interrupting my train of thoughts…
or the time you were helping me to put on my socks, or  came running to me, every time i freaked out about a leech on my feet
Do you remember dancing for me? or the way you constantly keep checking for your wallet, passport and me…like as if , you’re worried you’d lose me …

There are so many of these little moments… that make me fall for you..all over again..So many of these moments that keep popping in my head…..
And even though we are miles apart right now… you are always on my mind…
This is me hoping and rooting for our “ All in good time”…….

And you have my word.. you have my heart…
Baby, I am in love with you
there…i said it…….  it’s about time you know…

You have witnessed this ruin and picked up every broken piece and build it up again into something so magnificent..You have healed my wrecked heart, and put it out of it’s misery…You know the parts of me, that refuse to see the light of the day, and you stayed… You stayed and filled up all these empty spaces and cracks and wrapped it up with your words of love… You traced your fingers through parts of me and noticed every wound, every scar, you planted a garden and made me a home…
So there..
I am in love with you…and your soul..
…i said it.. because you need to know….
And I know you are not dying to hear those words…
For I know better…
you my love..are afraid of forever…

It’s obvious we are on different pages….And you are nowhere close to me…
So i wait here..hoping for you to catch up…But my dear, if you’re going to stop reading..and shut this book…I beg you… do it NOW…

It’s obvious we are in different places.. hell even geographically speaking… we are in different time zones, and even so you are still a hour and a half behind me.

So I’m afraid…someday you will leave… just like everyone i have ever loved…
I am afraid to be that house falling into gentle ruin, i am afraid my walls will crumble and this beautiful garden will start to grow into an unwelcoming forest again.

So if you are going to break my heart… do it NOW
Because i am in love with you…And anytime after this, you’d be taking away my soul and I’d be trapped in this misery…..forever…
So if you are going to break my heart.. do it NOW..
Because if i stay now… I’ll stay forever…
And if i don’t leave now..
I’m afraid i’ll never make it out…
Because.. I am in love with you…..
And If i stay now.. I’ll Stay forever..
.and guess what.. forever scares me too….
Yours,
Nica…

 - I am in Love With You // Letters I’ll Never Send
@themonicashastriblog

P.s : Thanks for the prompt you lovely lady, @justscribbledwords… :D

Only you have that effect on me. Only you can make my heart skip a beat just because your name flashed up on my phone screen. Only you can make thousands of butterflies appear in my stomach when we talk. Only you can make me feel like the happiest person in the world by hearing your laughter. I am completely, utterly, foolishly in love with only you.
—  i love you