so there’s a boy. a nice boy who treats me like he should, talks to me everyday, and cares about me. i should want him, but i don’t.

so there’s a boy. a bad boy who treats me like shit, talks to me when he feels like it, and doesn’t give a damn about me. i shouldn’t want him, but i do.

the nice boy, the one i should want, does everything he can to make sure i’m happy.

the bad boy, the one i shouldn’t want, does only enough to string me along because he knows i’ll stay.

it doesn’t make any sense, i know that. but it’s like being with the nice boy who gives a damn is too easy, too ordinary, too predictable, and too painless. maybe i just hate myself enough to go through hell, or to sit in my bed and cry like the world is collapsing around me, like i am crashing and burning and there is nothing i can do about it, all because i think i love him. but love shouldn’t be painful, it should be easy and ordinary and predictable in such a way that it lights a fire in your soul and puts happiness in your heart. that’s what I should want, but it’s not what i choose.


the fire you light doesn’t light up my soul, it burns me, and it hurts like hell

everything i never say // #47

nah but I just wanna talk about the s4 premiere versus the finale for a sec

In the premiere, Stiles and Lydia are a team. They have a plan to save Derek in Mexico and, despite their individual worries, they’re confident next to each other. When Stiles feels scared or isn’t sure what to do he glances at Lydia, and then he just suddenly knows what to do and has the confidence to go through with it. Though they do talk, words don’t need to be spoken between them. Stiles doesn’t have to say he’s scared out loud because Lydia can see that he is through eye contact alone, and she can silently communicate back to him that she’s here for him just like he always is for her. They both remain focused. Their plan is successful, despite a brief run in with hunters, and they all make it back across the border, unscathed.

In the finale, Lydia isn’t there with Stiles. Right from the start, before the gang has even left, that doesn’t sit well with Stiles because he knows she could be in danger. Her missing throws his whole world off kilter and you can actually physically see him losing focus because his mind is wandering to wherever she is. Scott’s the one in danger in Mexico this time though. Stiles has to go. And he is scared the entire time.

Stiles and the others don’t have much of a plan, basically just bust into the Church and hope for the best. Stiles nearly dies before they even reach Mexico because Liam starts to lose control. Stiles tries to get ahold of Lydia multiple times, once before they leave and again when they’re in the heart of the Church, right before the fight. He is that desperate to hear her voice or know that she’s at least okay. He doesn’t meet anyone’s eyes or try to talk to them, not Peter or Kira, not Liam or even Malia, his girlfriend. There’s no one giving him confidence or reassurance now. The closest he gets to emotional communication is with his dad, when Stiles has to admit through the phone that he doesn’t know what he’s doing and he’s terrified. The plan (if it can be called that) is successful, but only barely with added unexpected help from Chris and his hunters. It's a sloppy rescue mission from start to finish in comparison to the premiere.

I think 3B and 4 have really emphasized the unspoken connection between Lydia and Stiles. I think its especially apparent when you look at comparisons like this, and realize that Stiles and Lydia are better together. That there is this, I don’t know, this thing, this tether, that does give them this special bond so that they can understand each other on a deeper level than the average relationship. No one seems to understand their feelings and emotions better than each other. No one else knows exactly what to say or do to get through to them, or give them confidence, or make them feel better. Without Lydia there…Stiles wasn’t on his game. He was stumbling around trying to lead the way and help his friends like one of his legs was missing. “Not without Lydia” basically translates to “I need you, Lydia” because she’s his greatest support system and he would be devastated to ever lose her.

I don’t think it was a coincidence that in this same episode Lydia was shown wielding a bat as a weapon without shame. She could have grabbed anything else, but she went for the metal baseball bat. Its just another example of that unspoken connection they have. You can’t tell me that Lydia didn’t look at that bat and think of Stiles and be hit with a rush of confidence. Because that’s exactly what happened.

Stiles and Lydia are more than good friends at this point, its much more intimate than that without it (officially at least) being called romantic; they’re like a part of each other now. And, wow, when you look at where they started from… its just really beautiful.

Am I the only one who really hates the Fire version of Elsa's "Let It Go"?

Because there are so many problems with it and no one even bothers to fix it and it sounds horrible. Look, at least TRY to match a melody people, you can’t just throw in new words and hope it works and I feel myself cringing when singers have to force notes that aren’t even there.

You can find it here: http://tuiteyfruityundead.tumblr.com/post/73981048671/let-them-burn-eternaldisneymagic

Now here’s why it’s really bugging me:

“the volcano glows red and everyone’s dead” 11 syllables
“the snow glows white on the mountain tonight” 10 syllables

You don’t replace a one syllable word with a THREE SYLLABLE ONE
How about “The sky glows red” or “The fire glows red”

“Couldn’t keep it in, hell only knows I’ve tried”

“heaven knowns” 3
“hell only knows” 4

Suggestion: “Hell would know”

“Time to show the world it’s my turn!” 8
“Turn away and slam the door” 7

Suggestion: “Show the world that it’s my turn!”

 "Flames never seemed to bother me.“ 8
"The cold never bothered me anyway” 10

Oh, now we’re cutting back on syllables. Okay, fine. Also, trying to force ‘me’ to rhyme with scream. Come on now.

Suggestion: “The flames shouldn’t bother my self esteem.”

If you really want scream:

“The flames never once really bothered me”

(Seriously you can’t rhyme much with scream effectively. New words could have been considered too, like 'cry’)

“It’s funny how this inferno” 8

“It’s funny how some distance” 7

Suggestion: “It’s funny how this fire” (Fire can be made to sound like 2 syllables when sung like 'fai-yer’)

“It’s funny how the burning”

“It’s funny how the lava”

“It’s funny how some firestorms”

“It’s funny how some kindling”

(I can go on and on and on replacing a 3 syllable fire word with a proper 2 syllable one.)

“No right, no wrong, when it’s only me!” 9

“No right, no wrong, no rules for me!” 8

Suggestion: “No right, no wrong, when it’s just me!”

“See my fire across the sky! (if fire is said like 'fi-er’ it can work, but other 2 syllable fire words can be used here to sound more natural)

Suggestion: "Se me burning across the sky!”

“I can burn like the sun on high!”

“I am one with the sun and sky”

“Like a rocket I can fly!” 7 <— This part just feels kinda forced. Rocket?

“You’ll never see me cry” 6

Suggestion: “And everyone will die!”

“Watch everybody die!”

“The smoke blocks out the sky”

“On cinders I can fly!”

“Raining down Armageddon” 7
“When I’ll rise like the break of dawn” 8

Suggestion: Add a 'the’ before Armageddon or 'an’

…Not like anyone will care about my nitpicking or attempt to sing the suggested lyrics, since that messed up one is the popular one now.

*grumbles angrily*

Punk Series: He gets in a fight

Liam:  I was cleaning up my apartment,while I was about to head to shower someone knocked on my door. “Coming” i walked over and saw Zayn Holding Liam up “What the hell happen”“We had a deal to take car of and we had a problem” Zayn laid Liam on the couch.“I will leave you with him” I walked Zayn to the door & then went to get the first-aid kit.“Liam this is going to burn” i told him as i applied Alcohol on a cloth.“SHIT Y/n” he said as  it on his cuts “Not my fault you got into this mess”“I know but just be careful”“I am” After i cleaned him up i took him to my room.“your the best babe” he whispered as i kissed his forehead “Okay well i have to go shower”“Can i join?”“Nope you have to rest” i walked to the bathroom.

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Zayn:   I was leaving the Locker room after everyone was gone.I was heading to class when Max and his friends walked up to me “Hey babe you want to have some fun with me"he grabbed my ass "Let me go” “Aw babe you know you want me more than you want that punk Zayn” he slammed my hands on the wall “LET GO OF ME” i yelled trying to get him off me but he was to strong. I was in tears by now as he sucked on my neck “LET ME GO” i yelled his friends just laughed at me.As i had my eyes closed his weight was off me “WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU WERE DOING” Zayn yelled at him while punching him repeatedly “She liked it” max said “YOU FUCKIN CUNT” “ZAYN” i yelled trying to get him off “DON"T YOU EVER GET NEAR GIRLFRIEND AGAIN” Zayn got off a bad injured Max “You tell anyone about this your dead” Zayn wrapped his arms around me “I will never let anyone touch you okay” Zayn kissed my forehead “I know”

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Niall:  "Niall & I were at a club with the boys.“Babe I want to dance”“Babe not now” “FIne i will go dance by myself”“Okay” he continued talking to the boys. I walked to the dance floor and danced with random people. I was swaying my hips when someone wrapped their arms around me “Hey hot stuff” he whispered in my ear it wasn’t Niall. “Get off me” i pushed him but he grabbed my waist “C'mon babe let’s have some fun” he was drunk “Let go of me i have a boyfriend”“He doesn’t have to know” I tried to get out his grip Once i did Niall was there “DON’T YOU EVER TOUCH MY GIRL” Niall punched him straight in the face “SHE ASKED FOR IT” the drunk guy on the ground answered.Niall Lost it and started to fight the guy “NIALL” i yelled for him to stop but the bouncers got him & took him outside.“Ni” i said examining his face “You okay?” he asked me concern “Yeah but you aren’t”“I don’t care only if you are” I kissed his lip.

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Harry:   I was leaving the Library to see Jennifer and her boyfriend.I just walked when they started to yell for me “HEY UGLY” they yelled but i ignored them “Oh NOW YOU WANT TO ACT LIKE A BAD GIRL BECAUSE YOU HAVE HARRY” i heard them run up to me “WELL HE IS JUST MESSING WITH YOU to GET IN YOUR PANTS” i didn’t respond but she grabbed my arm and slammed me to the locker “You know what I’m saying is true” she whispered in my face “GET OFF HER” I heard Harry yell. She let go of me and i went to Harry’s side “LOOK WHO IS HERE?” Jennifer boyfriend said “You leave my girl alone”“WHY WE ALL KNOW YOU JUST WANT TO GET IN HER PANTS”“SHUT UP”“WATCH WHEN SHE LET’S YOU IN YOU WILL DUMP HER” Harry went straight to him and punched him “I TOLD YOU TO SHUT UP” they were fighting “HARRY STOP"I yelled getting him off him."Let’s go"he grabbed my arm and we left."No one will mess with my girl” he kissed my forehead.

Louis:    You were with Louis at his job.“babe when are we going to leave” i said “In a bit babe” As he talked to his friends a group of guys walk into the bar.“Hey we’re cl-” Louis cut him self off when he saw them “What the fuck are you doing here” Liam got off his chair “Well i came to check this place out”“GET OUT” Niall yelled “Well who is this hot stuff” the guy walked closer to me but Louis stood in front of me “GET OUT” he yelled “Hey babe what’s your name” the leader said to me “Don’t talk to her”“Hmm You must be good in bed” he bit his lip and Louis lost it.He started to punch him “DON’T FUCKIN TALK TO HER YOU HEAR” he yelled punching him.“LOUIS” i cried out the boys got him off the guy.“I WILL SEE YOU LATER BABE” the guys left. “He will never get near you” Louis kissed my lips.

There’s a riot in my ribcage
and I think I might be sick.
I’m losing myself in uncertainty
and insecurity,
screaming at the stars,
begging for a way to light
another’s dark
when baby,
I’ve been dead for years.
And even I don’t know
what to make of the moon anymore.
I waste my time howling at the fullness of her
when a crescent is the only one who will smile back.
And these days,
I am waxing and waning
all too impulsively,
desperate to spin myself into something
desirable again.
So desperate for a way to make love stay,
the wretched word has begun to burn holes in my cheeks.
This is just a fever and a bad dream,
remedied by sweat and a little sleep.
Nothing good ever stays with me, but hell,
that’s what keeps the fire from going out,
that’s what keeps the moon chasing the sun,
that’s what keeps me from looking away
from the collision on the highway
like an entire city up in flames:
the way something is both terrible and beautiful,
that all you feel is a tremendous ache.
How do you make love stay?
You don’t. You just ache.
You just ache.
—  Haunted Heart

Somebody wished they hold hand…here you go. 

Please do not hate me for this, just a silly thing. I ship them too so as many of you out there (how can you not to?) my recent work with them really asking for the ’holding hand’ version. 

I do not know their interaction yet, I only guessing and make up my own mind who is the dominant and who is the timid one. (Haytham is the boss atm, Shay is a sensitive one in private)

Sorry for the slack work, I am hopeless with manip but I had to see what I am capable of and yes, I failed.

I don`t know how to react

A lot of people think that Leonard is somehow alive after 1x15 finale. Some of us don`t. 

*trying to hold on Captain Canary*

They promised us that Leonard is going to be in Flash and LoT next seasons. But.. I AM REALLY AFRAID that it`s not going to be OUR Leonard - the one after 1x15. I am so sorry think it`s going to be some alternative reality (FlashPoint, Earth 2) or some ghost or Leonard before all of this (maybe LoTteam would need something to steal and have to hire the best robber of all times) or flashback or any other way.

I still remember how exciting we were just month ago.. and it`s still heartbreaking now. It still hurts burns like hell and it never ends.

Believe me. i want him back! HIM !! not any ghosts or alternative. Just him as he is. Just our Snart.


went to my friend’s birthday party as Emily from Corpse Bride

and I know the seam at my mouth is actually from sally from a nightmare before christmas and that that is a horrible crime and that I will burn in hell for it forever but at that point I had been cursing at my make up for forever and I was just fuck it I’m not going to spend another hour on that gap in her cheek let’s be a rebel and now I feel guilty about it so please don’t increase that feeling I am not worthy I know

It is 11:26 and I am thinking about this pain.
The pain that every woman knows as a “gut feeling” or a “woman’s intuition.”
I am sitting here quietly thinking about where I come from, and forgetting where I wanna go.
But I know that you know that no matter where I go,
I’ll never forget the place I call home.
Because people are like trees and they have roots that stretch so far under the ground, they touch hell.
And sometimes the hell I feel is your heaven, and sometimes it’s the other way around.
But my roots are burning at the core,
trying to wrap themselves around fantasy and reality.
They are twisting and turning, trying to find the light.
but just like that, they stop.
the world stops.
My heart has dropped to the floor, but no one notices because this is not their reality. This is not their heaven or hell or somewhere in between.
This is my life and the people in it are just bystanders.
They are just bystanders
—  a.r.w