Coming home to find your husband, Jonathan Pine, ending a man’s life. He stares deep into your eyes with a worried expression, knowing that the past he’s been hiding has finally caught up with him, and now he has to tell you what he really does for a living, hoping that you will still love him.
This is a bit of a belated post (but just in time for Suicide Squad!! ;D) for one of the most fun commissions I’ve worked on - Rule 63 Harley Quinn and Joker based on two awesome & lovely cosplayers from Melbnova! ♦️🃏
I think it says a lot about Things Us Muggles Don’t Know that when Harry mishears “Europa is covered in ice” as “Europa is covered in mice”, he doesn’t for one second think “wait a minute. that can’t be right.” he takes it absolutely in stride. he just copies it down into his notes and writes it in his essay like “yep. all over one of Jupiter’s moons. mice.” what weird things has he learnt about the universe that Europa being covered in mice doesn’t give him pause? what else don’t we know???
I absolutely LOVE how much Hermione gets Sirius. she’s 110% gung-ho cheerleading/spearheading the whole Harry Should Teach Us Defence thing until Sirius enthusiastically leaps on board and then she’s like “oh. Oh.” and starts FRANTICALLY REEVALUATING like, “whoa whoa whoa, okay, hold up guys! hang on a second!!! maybe we need to press the PAUSE BUTTON on this EXPULSION ATTEMPT until we find the Marauder-shaped FLAW in this PLAN!!!”
sometimes I forget that Harry and Draco et al. are Teen Boys. well, okay, I don’t forget that they’re teen boys, but I forget that they’re teen boys exactly like the legions of teen boys I went to school with, i.e. they are Idiot Lads whom I DESPAIR OF. case in point: Harry flies into a rage because Draco Malfoy, Sore Loser, says that Harry’s mother’s and the Weasley’s houses smell. Draco makes a long-winded, poncey “your mum” jab and Harry gets himself banned from quidditch for life. honestly.
at one point Harry is sitting, staring into the fire, wishing that Sirius’s head would appear and “give him some advice about girls.” Harry… I can safely say that you’re gonna be left hanging on that front.
SPEAKING OF WHICH, I think it is ALWAYS worth mentioning that, for Christmas, “Sirius and Lupin had given Harry a set of excellent books”. I mean. wow, they… gave Harry some books. they both… gave Harry… haha. that’s so weird. I wonder why they both… together… gave Harry a joint present…? I’ll give you a clue: the answer to this question and the answer to “why won’t Sirius’s head show up in this fire and give me ADVICE about GIRLS?” is the same.
and Harry absolutely needs that advice about girls. at one point Cho approaches him about the fact that there’s a Hogsmeade trip on Valentine’s Day (probably after at least a fortnight of waiting for Harry to bring it up first) and Harry’s like, “oh. so there is. nice talking to you, Cho!” it takes SO LONG for the penny to drop that Harry has to sprint up a staircase to invite Cho to Hogsmeade with him. what bizarre train of thought did he ride on to have Cho Chang bring up Hogsmeade and Valentine’s Day in the same sentence and NOT wind up at the logical conclusion for at least a minute and a half? what goes on in this child’s head???
I am indescribably sad that Harry James Potter sat at the Gryffindor table and used a tablespoon as a mirror in which to do his hair and Draco Malfoy did not get to see this happen.
while we’re on the subject of my favourite fledgling gay: Draco is so involved in glaring at/utterly distracted by Harry during their charms exam that he loses his concentration and smashes a wineglass. how EMBARRASSING. I bet he just wanted to DIE. he definitely had to put his head in someone’s lap and get his hair stroked about that one. keep your pecker up, kiddo! he probably didn’t even notice!!!
Harry risks life, limb, detentions and the skin on the back of his hand to break into Umbridge’s office and floo Sirius because he’s so torn up about his dad being a wanker, and Sirius and Remus are literally THE MOST UNHELPFUL THEY HAVE EVER BEEN. the two of them just go off into paroxysms of joy. like, “okay, he was a bit of an arsehole, Snape really deserved it, BUT WAS JAMES PLAYING WITH THE SNITCH?” “he was messing up his hair?! OMG!” “[in the fondest voice imaginable] he was an idiot! we were ALL IDIOTS!!!” “Lily LOVED James in the end! who WOULDN’T LOVE JAMES???” like, guys. reel it in.
I think it’s quite sweet that Hagrid steals Harry and Hermione from a quidditch match to take them into the Forbidden Forest (in which there are, to name but a few: giant spiders that would eat them without a moment’s hesitation, angry centaurs harbouring anti-wizard leanings and a violent, 16ft-tall giant), and his only words of warning are, “Watch yerselves, now, there’s nettles.”
My favorite part of Beauty and the Beast is how, like, no one had good priorities. Nobody cares that the prince is gone. He’s been an accursed beast for years and years and if someone had seen that it would’ve kicked off Gaston’s Mob Song™ already, so that didn’t happen. The person who runs the kingdom has not been seen if literal years, but yet people could not BE more pressed that this one girl reads.