i've wanted to make something like this for awhile and i finally did

anonymous asked:

Chocobros reactions to their girlfriend saying 'I love you' first while cuddling them staring into their eyes? I've had a very hard week and need something fluffy and cute haha, I love your writing <3

I’m so sorry this took so long! I made it a little more lengthy than most drabbles, I hope this makes up for it. “φʕ•ᴥ•oʔ



Rainy day, rainy day, rainy day.

Spring in Insomnia always meant rain, so much rain, it made everything so grey and sleepy like. Which currently led to your predicament of you and Noctis currently curled up on your couch, both tucked up in a large blanket.

It wasn’t chilly, yet the two of you both enjoyed being bundled under a blanket together sharing heat. The man was spooning you from behind as you tried finding something to watch on Netflix, but the two of you had watched almost everything and the list wouldn’t update for another week.

“Just throw on whatever.” You stated to the question Noctis was about to ask, having to stifle a giggle, as you heard him pout. Rolling over to face the man, so you could see the adorable pout on his face, it was one of the cute reactions he saved just for you.

“Why do you always do that?”

“Do what?” You asked, wrapping your legs around his, as he sat down the remote on the coffee table beside your take out boxes.

Noctis scoffed, as he pulled you closer, scooting down further on the couch to bury his head into your neck. Nuzzling you warmly, as you stroked his hair, hearing the man began to doze off, you knew for a fact that you were to follow him shortly as you often did. You joked that the Prince often sapped you like a battery, and made you doze as much as him.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Do you think that when joker jumped in the chemicals to get Harley it made him a little more crazier , but crazier for her ? I've always kind of thought that


NEW HEADCANON! I love this so much. Thank you. 🙌

When SS Joker fell/jumped in the first time, let’s say he jumped for this example. He was not jumping for anyone nor was he jumping to save anyone. Pre-Joker was jumping for himself, perhaps to save himself. I don’t mean he was running from someone and then just decided to jump to ‘hide’, I mean maybe he really wanted to jump to save himself, to finally surrender to insanity. To prove to the other criminals that he’s the boss, the one they need to fear. That pre-Joker did the unthinkable, jumped into Ace Chemicals and survived. Proved it was possible, became even scarier.

Side note, I’m following a headcanon that said that SS Joker didn’t just turn crazy overnight when he jumped into Ace Chemicals, I go along with this headcanon/theory that SS pre-Joker rose in power over time. Gained followers. Scared the city, maybe fought the Bat. But there was always something missing. Pre-Joker didn’t like how he was one the same playing field as the other criminals, that he would be lumped in with ‘the thugs’ when the nightly news would report his crimes. The suits and jackets pre-Joker would wear so boring. He wanted to be different, to be THE ONE. The one when he walks into a room people instantly knew that their deaths soon followed. The one villain that if he came to your city, there would be mass evacuations. The scariest person to ever be known in Gotham City - clearly pre-Joker was as much of an attention seeker as Joker is - and he succeeded.

But Joker’s second jump was completely different. Let’s set the scene, even though I’m sure we’ve all watched the chemical wedding a hundred times, Joker brings Dr. Harleen Quinzel there to watch her die. To get rid of her, his headache, to finally be rid of this crazy obsessed doctor who won’t take a hint. But even if there is a large majority that wants her to die, there is this little part of him that wants her around. This little nag in a place he thought didn’t work anymore - his heart. Which is why he makes her take the oath, “Would you die for me? Would you live for me?” “Yes.” So a part of him, I think, did start to like her. Which is immediately evidenced by when Harleen falls and Joker jumps after her. He was scared, that she wouldn’t be immune to the toxins. That she wouldn’t live. So he jumped, pulled her out.

But on to your question, ‘Does this make Joker crazier for her?’ I love this question. Does them being in the chemicals together and Joker in after her, to bring her out, to save her, make him more attached to her? My shipper heart says yes, because I do think you see that co-dependence of Joker (and Harley) as he wants her back completely. I mean the chemicals probably would make him crazier the second time around and the second time he’s sharing that intimate “turning crazier experience” with someone else. 

Very interesting.


whatsideareyouon  asked:

I've been wondering for way too long just what it is that I want to be doing with my time. I know everyone is different and has different experiences, but I'd like to know: At what point did you decide to focus on drawing, and how did you choose art over everything else (were you just better at art than other things, or did you just love it enough to push through)? How long would you estimate it took in practice to get to the point where you thought "This is something I can do for real!" ?

Well I’ve been into art pretty much all my life. I fricken loved animals when I was a child so I often drew comics of my dog going on adventures with my friends or other family’s dogs, I even wrote stories about them for writing parts of class too (i remember having the longest stories in grade 4, lel). At first I was like “I wanna be a vet!” that quickly changed though once I got more into gaming and wanted to be a video game designer, which is actually something I still want to do someday. I never really had anything else that I was interested in? I was never really good at maths or sciences and stuff, I also didn’t really have anyone forcing me to choose something right away either cause my moms pretty chill. I graded, still didn’t really know what I wanted to do with my life (even tho I knew in the back of my mind it was gonna be art anyway) so I ended up working at walmart for awhile and then finally decided to go to art school cause I didn’t want to work the retail life anymore.

I don’t know if there was any real point where I was like “Art is something I can do!” because I knew it was always something I could do so I just did it cause that’s when I enjoy and am capable of. If you’re confused with what it is you want to do just take some time to explore, there’s no rush. You’ve got all your life after all, just make sure it’s something that you’re happy with. No one wants to work a 8 - 5 job they’re miserable with for the rest of their life.

anonymous asked:

Fallout 3 and 4 companions react to an immortal lone/sole being stabbed by a raider and just saying something like "You want this back or can I keep it?".

This is such an interesting and funny concept to me oh my god 

Fallout 3

Butch: As soon as he saw them being stabbed he ran towards the raider yelling “you mother fu-” and upon seeing that Lone was perfectly fine, he stopped in his tracks and, was speechless. He’d definitely ask about it later though, once they were safe. 

Clover: Immediately took down the raider, and didn’t even notice Lone was standing there watching. When she did though, she slowly walked up to them and poked them, just to make sure she wasn’t dreaming. 

Charon: He held back from yelling when he witnessed Lone being stabbed in a place that’s typically fatal. Expecting them to keel over, he ran over to them to catch them, except they didn’t fall. After Lone made their snide remark and killed the raider with ease, they looked at him like nothing happened. He didn’t say anything but just looked at them bewildered. 

Dogmeat: What the woof???

Jericho: “Holy mother of..” Jericho couldn’t finish his sentence before Lone offed the raider with a knife in their back. Lone took the knife out of them and handed it to him and told him to hold it for a second. “Uhhh… well this is new.” 

Fawkes: After he saw Lone being stabbed, a few times, he ran over and all it took was one punch for that raider to be out. He quickly looked over to Lone to see what the damage was, and saw them trying to wipe the blood off their clothes and saying “I just got this jacket too..” Fawkes made a point to ask if being immortal was a new thing that humans just, became. 

Star Paladin Cross: Running to jump in front of Lone to sacrifice herself, Cross didn’t make it before the raider had managed to jab a knife into them. Enraged, she killed the raider quickly before turning to Lone. They looked at her confused and asked if she was okay. After they explained, Cross said, “so when were you planning on telling me about this?” 

Fallout 4 

Cait: Cait had just finished off some other raiders when she saw - from afar- Sole being stabbed. She screamed out to them, but mid scream, she saw that they were unaffected. She just sat on the ground as she watched them finish off any raiders left. When they approached her, she just laughed at how worried she was. 

Curie: Curie was running towards Sole when it happened, and even though she watched them turn it around on the raider, she didn’t stop running. Regardless of the fact that they were telling her that they were fine, she had to make treat their wounds. 

Codsworth: “Sir/mum!” Codsworth didn’t have nerves, but just watching Sole being stabbed, he could damn near feel it. Even though he had just watched that unfold, they still managed to take down the raider before them. Afterward, they walked up to him like nothing happened, and he asked, “have you always been like this?!” 

Danse: He watched as Sole stumbled after being brutally stabbed by a raider, but before he could take action, he saw them take the knife out of themselves and say, “sorry, is this yours? Allow me to return it.” Then they thrust the knife back into the raider, dusted themselves off, and asked if Danse was okay. He replied with an open mouth and no words. 

Deacon: Standing aways away, Deacon silently watched Sole being stabbed and immediately returning the knife to the raider. Of course he was surprised, but he couldn’t let them know that, so he just said, “are you a new model of synth, orrrr…?” 

Dogmeat: Again, what the woof????

Gage: “Boss!” Gage called out to Sole at the same time a gunner lunged toward them with a knife. He fell silent, but that was before they turned it back around on the gunner. After they had said they were perfectly fine, he just laughed and didn’t really feel like questioning it. 

Hancock: After watching Sole miraculously come back from being stabbed multiple times, Hancock just, stared at them. Sole gave him a, “what?” He replied with, “is there something you want to share with the class?” 

MacCready: MacCready quickly ran and slid on his knees to catch Sole, because, most people fall to the ground when they get stabbed. Sole didn’t, so when they turned around to see Mac’s pants all ripped and dirty, they asked if he was playing baseball. 

Nick: “Oh Jesus..” Nick said under his breath as he witnessed Sole being thrust into by a lengthy knife. He started running toward them, but they acted indifferent and killed the raider. When they looked at the expression on Nick’s face, Sole just said, “what, were you worried or something?” 

Piper: Piper shoved the raider off of Sole after they stabbed them, she checked on Sole before killing the raider, in turn, Sole pushed her out of the way to deal with the raider. She stumbled back and just, looked at them. They told her they were fine, and all she said was, “this’ll make one hell of a story.” 

Preston: Preston yelled a loud, “General,” when he saw them being impaled by a knife by some raider. They didn’t even flinch, the dealt with the raider swiftly before asking if Preston was alright. When they did, he said never mind him and asked if they were okay and if they needed medical attention. It took Sole a long time to finally convince Preston they were okay. 

Strong: “Strong don’t understand.. human, not weak?”

X6-88: “Not, all humans are like this, right?” After watching the whole ordeal, X6 was really questioning humans. He had a whole lotta questions to ask them, but held off for awhile. He was surprisingly calm about it. 

18 Things I learned over the 18 Months of Living with T1D

This day, it has been exactly a year and half since my diagnosis of type 1 diabetes. Instead of being upset about this milestone, I’m celebrating and finally accepting that I will never have my old life back. I’ve come a long way to learn to love this disease, I wanted to hate it so badly. However, the more I resented it, the more I saw it as a burden, ultimately the more unhappy I became. Yes, times get extremely hard but those feelings come and go. So, instead of letting diabetes control me and my emotions, I’m going to take my emotions, my dedication and strength to control it. Diabetes may be a huge part of my life, I identify as a diabetic, but I will no longer let diabetes define me and take the reins of my life. Without further ado, here are the 18 things I learned over the 18 months of living with type 1 diabetes.

1. The less I hid my diabetes, the happier I became

I’m going to say that one more time. The less I hid my diabetes, the happier I became. This is the most important thing I learned. I was on injections for the first year of my diagnosis and I felt so ashamed. I hated having to excuse myself to take a shot, or taking shots in front of people. I would hide testing my blood sugar for crying out loud. I was sick of it. I told myself that as soon as I got an insulin pump, no more hiding. This is my health and if people feel uncomfortable about me taking care of my health then they are the ones that can excuse themselves. Now, I wear my pump with pride. I love when it sticks out from my clothes, I love how it’s blatantly visible. I love checking my blood sugar in public. Do people ask questions? Of course they do. Sometimes it can be intrusive but most of the time when people ask, “what’s that?” pointing to my pump I say it’s an insulin pump and they shrug and walk away. It’s a breath of fresh air being able to live my life without hiding a major part of it.

2. Not having perfect numbers 24/7 is fine and expecting perfect numbers 24/7 is not healthy mentally

I’m not a robot and I’m certainly far from perfect, so I will have “bad” numbers. I would freak out (sometimes still do, I’m still working on it) if I’m not in range. But the highs are inevitable just like the lows. They will happen, a lot, and it’s something I’ve accepted. I was driving myself insane striving for perfect numbers 24/7. It’s not a realistic expectation. Oh, and one more thing. I will no longer feel ashamed when a doctor, friend, relative, ANYONE, says “that’s not a good number, you need to get better at controlling your diabetes”. What do you think I’m doing??? No more shame, I’m done with it.

3. I’m strong. Like, really strong

I’ve been strong my whole life but I never knew how strong I actually am until I got diagnosed. I’ve handled so much shit this past year and a half and quite honestly I don’t know how I did it. Diabetes takes such a mental toll on whoever has it and it’s physically and mentally draining. I’ve struggled, cried a ton, wanted to give up, but I’m so so so so proud of myself for pressing on. I’ve surprised myself by seeing what I’m capable of. 

4. It’s truly okay to have a breakdown (or 5) in a day

Even though I just got done saying I’m strong, there are times where it’s okay not to be. I don’t see breakdowns as weakness anymore. I’ve embraced them and releasing those emotions is a relief. Having a burnout doesn’t make me weak or a bad diabetic, it makes me human. This disease is tough to handle at times and it’s okay to breakdown.

5. Not everyone is going to understand my disease and that’s okay

There is a huge difference between the people that don’t know what type 1 diabetes is and those who think they do know and shove their “knowledge” and “health tips” down your throat. There are a lot of people out there that think diabetes is caused by sugar or they don’t know the specifics of diabetes. These people, I learned to be okay with. All it takes is a simple conversation to explain to them what it is. Sometimes they get it, sometimes they don’t and if they still don’t, whatever, not worth my breath anymore. It’s okay if they still don’t understand.

6. How to speak up for myself and all the other type 1 diabetics

The other group of people I mentioned, I can’t get over. They irk me so badly and I will forever speak up to educate them so they stop spreading misconceptions. No, cinnamon won’t cure me. Yes, I’m sure. Yes I need insulin. No, losing weight won’t fix it. I know there are some people out there that don’t feel comfortable confronting people about this (and that’s perfectly okay!!!) but I can’t stand by. I used to, but not anymore. I’ve heard some ridiculous comments and I’m not afraid to say something more ridiculous back to them.

7. Not every single friend is going to be part of my support system

Just because they’re my friend doesn’t mean they have to be part of my support system. My system consists of my family, my boyfriend, his family, my best friend and my fur babies (my kitty and my parents’ 2 dogs). Don’t get me wrong, I love all of my friends but it’s okay that they’re not part of my support system. Quite frankly, it would be exhausting if that many people were! Having to explain every situation to them, no thank you. Not going to lie, my thought process used to be “if they’re not going to be there for me then screw them!” but I learned that they have lives of their own, hardships they have to deal with, and just because they don’t check in on me that doesn’t make them bad friends. I love my friends, every single one, inside my support system and out.

8. But, it’s also okay to cut some people off

I was diagnosed my last semester senior year of college and it SUCKED. I was rarely ever at school, back and forth between doctors and my internship. Eventually my friends and I drifted apart (granted there was other shit involved). Stuff went down, I was singled out, was shit talked on, you know, typical girl bullshit. A few months after graduation I confronted one of them and asked what happened. She didn’t really have an answer except for “well you were never really there….” Seriously?! Did it ever occur to you that I was smacked in the face with a life changing diagnosis? Instead of being bitter about it, I let them go. Some people aren’t meant to be in your life and my diagnosis made me realize that.

9. How to say no

For so long I was afraid to miss out on anything. I literally suffered from FOMO. Even if I didn’t feel good or was super busy, I always wanted to be part of whatever was going on. Post-diagnosis I’ve learned to finally chill, to say no. And not only that, but I also learned to stop feeling bad about saying no. I’m number one in my life and my health comes before anything else. If I’m too tired, if my numbers aren’t good and I feel like crap because of it, then I’m not going anywhere. I will be a little hermit in my apartment and that’s that. It took a lot for me to get over my FOMO but once I did, I became happier.  

10. To never feel bad about diabetes coming in the way of work, obligations, etc

This one is extremely important. It took me awhile that I am my first priority. If my blood sugars aren’t allowing me to perform at work then I need to take some time and chill before resuming. It’s definitely easy since I have an understanding boss but this extends outside of work. If I have to cancel an obligation at the last minute because of my blood sugars, I don’t even care anymore if the other party gets pissed. I’m sorry but my body and my health comes first, everything else is second.

11. How to master survival mode

High blood sugar? Survival mode. Low blood sugar? Survival mode. Almost dying for a hot second? Survival mode. I’m happy I can successfully treat my highs and lows, with little to no panic (sometimes). I can guzzle down 2 juice boxes in 10 seconds flat, which I find impressive. On the flip side, I know to take it easy and lay low when I’m high. It kind of sounds easy as I’m writing this but mastering survival mode certainly wasn’t easy at all but it’s a good skill to have.

12. To never give up

I was in a really dark place for a long time when I was diagnosed. My depression came on strong. I thought about ending it all and wanted to give in but I never gave up. I still fight to this day because I don’t want diabetes to win. It’s easy to quit, it’s harder to keep going. Is it tough? Oh yeah. But I think this life is a beautiful thing and I want to keep on living in it.

13. Humbleness

I’m a giant walking ball of contradictions. I was the most prideful yet unconfident person ever. I thought I was hot shit but also thought I was a piece of shit. Anyway, diabetes taught me how to tame the prideful side of me. When you see something tragic or hear of someone close to you getting diagnosed with something awful you think “oh my God that’s awful but it’ll never happen to me”. That was me. I did that. I took my life and my health for granted. You don’t realize what will happen when the day does come. It was sure one hell of a wake up call for me. I don’t really know how to describe it but diabetes has made me more humble.

14. How to listen and pay attention to my body

Holy crap, I can’t even begin to count how many times I took my body for granted pre-diagnosis. Now? I feel my blood sugars when they’re high and low. I feel when my stomach is unsettled from something I ate. I have a pain somewhere in my body, I better find out what it’s coming from. Paying attention to how my body reacts to things is crucial and could honestly save my life at times. I’m so thankful I learned this and I’ll never take my body for granted anymore.

15. I’m more than my goddamn numbers

Blood sugar numbers, A1C, my weight, number of carbs… it’s never ending. I would get so caught up with all of these numbers and it stressed me like crazy. I’m. More. Than. Numbers. I’m a person, with feelings and a personality, go figure! No longer will I feel ashamed if I had “bad” blood sugar numbers, and a “not so good” A1C, etc. I’m trying my best and that’s all that should matter. I’m so sick of nurses and doctors telling me I need to get better at controlling my diabetes. Well you know what? They have no idea what I go through on a daily basis, they have no idea how much I bust my ass to get good numbers. So I’m done. I’m more than my numbers and they can all kiss my ass.

16. To be more responsible

I’m not saying I was never responsible in the past. However, taking care of myself when I have a chronic illness is a completely different level of responsibility. I have so much more on my plate now and I have to be mindful about taking care of myself. My point about saying no, that right there is being responsible about myself. I also don’t depend on anyone to remind me to be responsible (though it is nice to have a little encouragement). On the flip side, letting loose and not caring is just as important. (Like I said before, I’m a walking ball of contradictions).

17. That I’m limitless

Diabetes can’t, and won’t, hold me back from doing the things I love. Type 1 diabetes may be a chronic illness but it won’t stop me. Exercising was tough at first, I always went low, but I learned how to manage my blood sugars while exercising. If I want to eat pizza, I’ll eat some damn pizza! (Unless my stomach hurts already, pizza irritates my stomach hahaha). I even have a tattoo that says “You are unlimited” because that’s exactly what I am. Unlimited. I’m just like anyone else. Sometimes certain things are a little harder with diabetes (like exercising, which I mentioned) but it makes me want to push past the challenges and try even harder.

18. How to love myself

This one took awhile. I hated my diabetes, so that meant I hated my pancreas. Hated my pancreas because it stopped working which meant I hated my immune system. I hated my immune system for it not working properly. See? It’s a vicious cycle. I learned to love myself on the inside (and the outside too but still working on that one a little bit). I can’t hate myself anymore. God made me the way he wanted me to be made. I’m perfect the way I am.

I’m learning every day and it’s definitely still a work in progress. However, having a more positive outlook on my condition I can say I’ve been happier. Positive vibes my fellow T1D’s, positive vibes.

anonymous asked:

First of all, I want to congratulate you. I love everything you write! And now my question. I've read that John is Mary's possession and I don't really understand it. Is it just because she is possessive and jealouse or is there something else about her that I don't see? Thanks for your time!

Awww, thank you Nonny!! That’s very kind! :D

Mmm, John as Mary’s possession is something I’ve wanted to talk about for awhile and just never got around to doing. I discussed it a bit at the bottom of this post here, but I’m going to expand upon it here for you. 

Before I begin I should probably state for my new followers that I LOVE Mary. I love that she’s an interesting, complex character and I think that her arc as a villlain-of-sorts is already shaping up to be a rather exciting one. However, this meta will paint her in a rather negative light, but only because logically, that is what the narrative is telling us. So if you like Mary and sympathize with her, this meta is not for you. My meta are always based on facts within the show; granted my opinions are skewed towards Mary-as-a-villain, but know that this is actually one of my favourite Sherlock things ever so I speak very passionately about her character arc. I’m just taking what I’m seeing on screen and translating it for the masses.

Okay, so now that that is over-with, let’s dive into this thing.

To understand her possessive behaviour, I think we need to break down her character. As I see it, I believe she is Jim’s operative, and John was her mission… except she wasn’t supposed to “fall in love” with John (which I’ll get to in a moment), simply was supposed to keep him alive and steal him away from Sherlock to ‘burn out [Sherlock’s] heart’. It’s this theory here that is the only thing that makes me think Moriarty is still alive (the only thing confusing me is her surprise at the tarmac to Jim’s return… perhaps she was worried he’d come back for vengeance because she tried to kill Sherlock? We’ll see soon enough).

The timing of Mary’s arrival into John’s life is too convenient to have simply been a coincidence, all the more reason I think Mycroft is also stuck in this mess; he’s the only one who knew where Sherlock was most of the time, so anything Mycroft knew, Jim knew. Another thought that I’m having is this: we know that Mycroft was keeping tabs on John while Sherlock was away… so what if he also saw John was becoming more and more depressed / suicidal? Mycroft was instructed to keep John alive, by Jim. Enter Moriarty’s former right-hand woman who just *happens* to also be a nurse this time around.

I think this is how we can tie in Mary and Mycroft working together; he knew of her from his CIA-on-a-freelance basis missions, and we’ve been told that Mary has done wet jobs for the CIA (and possibly some of those wet jobs were for Mycroft a LONG time ago).  Perhaps she came to Mycroft, on Jim’s orders and offered to keep his brother’s friend alive. I’m still working out this part all in my head and how it works with my theory about Mary.

So, initially Mary was with John as part of her mission – keep John alive and make him fall in love with her, because Sherlock would return and his heart had to feel truly broken. Except as a romantic, Mary possibly also fell in love with him in some odd way; possibly more with the idea John and with the sense of security he offered when they finally got together. John was constantly in a state of grieving and she possibly found out a tonne about Sherlock that even Moriarty didn’t know about, and in turn realized just how much John actually may have loved Sherlock. But John’s stupid pining over his “dead” friend was starting to get on her nerves… and god this new life of hers was so boring.

Okay, so how does all that relate to Mary being possessive of John? Well, enter Sherlock, and John straying away from her. 

I think in order to answer WHY she does it, we should consider a few things about her character. The mystery of why she would continue to keep John in her grasp without Jim around is something I’m still struggling with. Perhaps if she is the ringleader in all of this, she still would want to burn out Sherlock’s heart if only to gain a sick sense of pleasure out of it. She still would want to keep John all for herself because he is the ultimate trophy for her winning the game she’s playing with Sherlock. I just did a quick meta on the deductions of Mary during the night of their first meeting, and aside from “liar” a few of the deductions struck me as interesting, despite them being a bit muddled in Sherlock’s head:

DISILLUSIONED: (def: ‘having lost faith or trust in something : disappointed that something is not as good, valuable, true, etc., as it had seemed’). Okay, this is HUGE to me. I initially speculated that perhaps Sherlock is reading all of his deductions of her as also being a façade because she’d been living this lie for so long, but now that I’m taking the time to actually have to look at these deductions, I’m starting to think that was an incorrect theory. This is all still very much a self portrait. 

ANYWAY, back onto ‘disillusioned’. Look at that definition: could that possibly describe John and / or her mission? Perhaps she’s coming to realize living 5 years in a lie wasn’t all it was cracked up to be; she’s getting bored, and is beginning to lose faith in this plan of Jim’s ever working… Was she promised this amazing romance and a tonne of money if she just kept John alive? Or promised a clean slate if she just did this one thing? Dear Jim, can you fix it for me that I never get found by the people who want to kill me? Jim found himself a crack-shot sniper and in turn for her services he told her how fantastic Sherlock’s pet was, that he would be the best thing Mary had, all she had to do was keep John alive and keep him away from Sherlock. Good thing she already knew Mycroft.

But now that she got John, perhaps she’s finding JOHN not as great as advertised. At least not now that Sherlock has returned (or possibly always, because he’s just a boring, depressed doctor who’s constantly talking about his dead best friend; it’s driving her crazy). The fact that she’s already exhibiting these “disillusioned” words probably point to how bored she is at this point with this mission and with John in general.

Funny how having John straying away suddenly makes her want John back again… 

ONLY CHILD: Now, taking into account the above theory that, in fact, the deductions are actually Mary’s and not her persona’s, I now believe that Mary is not Moriarty’s sibling, as many have been speculating since TAB. Sherlock’s deductions were all over the place that night, but for the most part they were correct… Sherlock is rarely wrong in that regard, he’s just having a harder time processing them now that his emotions and his probable concussion are factors in this one.

GUARDIAN: Of whom? Who is she protecting? I’ve seen theories that it’s possibly her past child, a past family, a past in general; ‘Guardian’ does imply protector of a child or family. But you know what else Mirriam-Webster defines a guardian as? “One who has the care of the person or property of another”. Mary is protecting another person’s person / property (Sherlock’s John) until she’s good and ready to be done with him, or until another move happens in their perilous game that they are all playing.

SHORTSIGHTED: (def. ‘not considering what will or might happen in the future’). Here’s where I point out that she completely and totally didn’t think about what would actually happen once Sherlock returned. This is also where I point out that I am completely believing that she also faked the pregnancy: she had a plan but definitely had no idea how she would pull it off. OR the pregnancy WASN’T planned but is NOT John’s. Either way, this deduction is amusing to me because Sherlock also deduces that she’s clever… How can one be so shortsighted if she’s clever? I think she’s only clever when she needs to think quickly, when she needs to think of a “right now” solution. Clever people don’t just shoot other people who offer to help them.

As an aside, clever has the synonyms of “crafty”, “cunning”, “canny” and “shrewd”, so. I’ll leave you to your deductions.

SECRET (by itself): (def. ‘kept hidden from others; known to only a few people; keeping information hidden from others). This is also damning, to me, for it to be separated from the tattoo deduction, since it’s such a character trait of Mary. She’s hiding who she is as a person, and it’s only known to a select few people. I think David may have been her confidante, and I think Janine also may know, since I believe she’s Jim’s sister. Magnussen knew who she was before she was “Mary”. This deduction can be used in conjunction with “liar”. 

The sad thing is that because Sherlock was such an emotional mess, he chooses to ignore all these red flag deductions about her. 

SECRET TATTOO: There are a few good meta on this, but basically the gist of this theory is that she wears a tattoo of the Black Lotus from TBB on her heel. Unless someone was specifically looking for it, no one would know. So… John’s not a foot-man, anyway. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

In all seriousness, though, if this is the case, then her involvement possibly goes back further than we suspected, and leaves us to wonder about the mysterious Black Lotus. Are they a faction of Moriarty’s organization? Did Moriarty find her there? Is she the ringleader in it all? 

In any sense I hope they address some of these more damning deductions.

ANYWAY, Nonny, this post TOTALLY went in a completely different direction than you initially asked for, apologies, I do that sometimes (and by that I mean ALL THE TIME). But I think it helps to understand her character as a whole to see how her love (or non-love) for John is possessive, and I think it’s a good idea to examine her as Sherlock would. 

I think what it all boils down to is that she’s possessive in a way that means she needs to keep John alive in order to guarantee her own survival. “She’s gone a bit freelance” = she’s not playing by Jim’s orders anymore. The reason Mary started to become possessive of John was because he started to stray back to Sherlock, however unintentionally she meant for it. Perhaps she didn’t really think John was in love with Sherlock. Maybe there was a bit of jealousy, but I doubt it. She actually thrived on giving John temporarily back to Sherlock only to take him away again. 

From then on, winning John’s affections became a game to her. Imagine her elation at finding out Sherlock was being sent away indefinitely to his death. The fact that she even showed up at the tarmac when there was NO REASON FOR HER TO EVEN BE THERE tells me that she wanted to continue to make it clear to Sherlock that she had won this game, and quite possibly to ensure he actually was leaving. I also believe she gets some twisted satisfaction in rubbing it into Sherlock’s face that she has ultimately “won” John from Sherlock despite everything, and it’s this scene here that seals it for me:

Look at the way she just latches onto John here in a very possessive manner: both hands and holding onto him like he’s going to run off. And all right in front of Sherlock; he knows she’s doing it on purpose. She’s pouring salt on the wounds to a man already dead, stabbing the knife in a little deeper. Look at his eye-roll or blinky-blink as he’s turning to talk to his brother; he knows she’s being petty. Heck, I bet you Mary was hesitant to leave them to talk together because she actually thinks Sherlock might try something.

With Mary, I think it’s the idea of John that she likes; having him around grants her some sort of stability. As much as I don’t want a redemption arc for her, I’m wondering if she thought she was genuinely getting a fresh start in her life, and John was her ticket to that; stay with him long enough to finish her mission, she gets a clean slate, and creates a fake death for herself to break it off with John. My only qualm with this is that if she truly was starting fresh, then she would not still have a perfectly fitting assassin’s outfit and a gun with a silencer hidden away from John’s eyes. There’s definitely more to her than the clues the narrative can currently provide.

In the end, honestly, Mary is a psychopath, possibly a sociopath, given her need to feel like she “wins” everything (seriously, read those links and check off all that apply to Mary; pretty much all of it). I don’t think she has any remorse whatsoever for the shit she inflicted upon John and Sherlock. MAYBE she felt a “tiny bit” when she shot Sherlock and said sorry? Maybe she genuinely liked Sherlock? I don’t know; I find that hard to believe when she shoots THEN says sorry. I think it was more because she thought he was actually going to die, so make his last moments not TOO horrible; his death WAS going to guarantee John being close to her again, after all. All she’s concerned about is herself and a means to her end. It’s this possessive behaviour that I feel she exhibits will finally be her downfall. 

I personally love her character arc; I love that she’s not a whimpering side character, but instead a baddie that could possibly surpass Moriarty in her deviousness. I don’t think she’s above the whole “killing because you’re not mine any more” trope; some psychopaths have done this before. When Mary finally feels like a trapped animal she will try again; we’ve seen it happen in HLV twice, only I think this time it will be John who finally tries to stop her, possibly by protecting Sherlock. And I think, sadly, that this will only end in tears for everyone.

I have my own headcanons for *that moment*, but perhaps another time. On a closing note… we’ve never actually heard her tell John she loved him; yet both John and Sherlock have told each other that they loved each other, albeit by-proxy. Let that sink in. I think that’s a huge flag right there.

EDIT: Okay, I also forgot to take into account about Mary pushing the two of them together in TEH. I… have no idea how this fits into the theory, other than I think that it was something she HAD to do begrudgingly. But it was definitely not something she wanted to do. I welcome others’ opinions on this matter.

EDIT 2: I also don’t think she is Moriarty, but more was his right hand person who possibly is answering to a new baddie. After some thinking on this, I think Mary was surprised because she wasn’t expecting him to return (ie. dead OR because he never let her know when he was going to return). If he is, in fact, alive, I think her fear IS  because she strayed from her mission and tried to kill Sherlock. I need to still think a bit more on some S4 plot theories, but this is the basic premise I’m working from right now, which will surly change as we go through setlock.

More from inevitably-johnlocked:  MY META || BEST OF MY BLOG || “STEPH REPLIES” SERIES


(Also I’m sorry if I used trigger wrong ;w; )

So this is the first time I’ve wrote a story in years. Not only that but this is my very first time writing the turtles. So please have mercy on me.

(also my grammar is not the best I’m so sorry) 

(My mind set was on the 2k3 turtles but I tried to keep it where ya’ll can picture whatever TMNT series you like. I’m sorry if I failed )

If you all want me to do spin offs or more romantic like stories of each turtle let me know. I’ll give it my best shot. :’D

With all that said ONTO THE STORY.

I hope you enjoy. ;w;

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100 Theme Drabble Challenge featuring HopeLight

previous themes

tower; post-LR epilogue. Lightning comes to a bunch of realizations through a series of letters to a certain someone…

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anonymous asked:

Could you do a Wolfstar fanfic based off the line "Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up/I need your loving hands to come and pick me up/And every night I miss you I can just look up/And know the stars are holding you/Holding you/Holding you tonight." -Tonight by FM Static

ok first i’m soso sorry this took so long also ik it’s angsty in the beginning but it’ll be okay i promise

Sirius was freezing.

Sirius was always freezing.

He’d lost count of how many nights he’d spent huddled on the ground, rags held as tight around him as they could go, bony knees pulled up to his chest and knocking into his chin as they shook.

He’d lost count of the nights altogether.

They’d all blurred together after the first few months, an eternal cold that wrapped around his body and settled in his bones and just wouldn’t let go, goddamnit, go matter how hard Sirius tried to escape it.

And, oh, did he try.

Those first months he’d wanted to keep his memories of before intact. Untainted. Safe.

It hadn’t lasted long.

Sirius caved early on, recalling James’ laugh and the way he’d muss his hair when Lily was around as people shrieked around him. He thought of Lily’s smile and how she’d looked on her wedding day when storms rose out of the sea and waves crashed against the walls. He pictured baby Harry babbling happily when Sirius arrived at the Potter’s door, carrying in something new and exciting every visit. He remembered Remus-

Actually, he tried very hard not to remember Remus. When he did, and it happened every month because of the goddamn moon, the only thing that kept Sirius sane was knowing that Remus wasn’t here with him. He wasn’t in this freezing cell, trapped listening to the others’ screams, he didn’t feel like his soul was slowly sneaking out of his body day by day, he was out.

So looking up at the night sky was both painful and relieving. It reminded him of Remus, but it also reminded him that Remus was safer than he was right now, that he wasn’t trapped in the same position as Sirius.

He fell asleep on those nights holding onto that thought, hoping that Remus wasn’t plagued by memories as he was.

Unfortunately, Remus still remembered too much. 

Fourteen years had gone by since James and Lily had died, and the painful ache of their loss had rarely left Remus since. 

It had softened, though, when Sirius returned. 

They’d danced around their feelings for awhile, Remus not knowing how to reach out when Sirius’ stare went blank or his hands began to shake, but they’d managed, finally.

Remus was living in a guest room of Grimmauld Place, helping Sirius adjust and working for the Order out of the house. He’d climbed into bed one night exhausted and frustrated at himself for not understanding what Sirius was going through when his door creaked open and a figure appeared in the frame.

“D’you mind if I…?”

Remus sat up in bed. “Sirius! No, not at all, just…” He gestured at the room, and Sirius crept in, shutting the door quietly behind him.

“Wanted to tell you something,” Sirius mumbled, sitting on the edge of the bed.

Remus took a breath, nodding and shifting over to give Sirius more room. “Go ahead.”

Sirius’ eyes flitted between Remus’ and the bed, his mouth open slightly but struggling to push the words out.

“It’s alright,” Remus said softly, wishing he could do more to help.

Sirius looked up and kept his eyes on Remus this time. He twisted the bedsheet in his hands, and Remus was about to offer more encouragement when Sirius spoke. 

“I missed you.”

His voice was very quiet, and Remus’ eyes softened and while Sirius’ darted back to his hands. “I still do, sometimes, even though you’re here, and I’m here, and it’s so stupid-”

Remus felt like he was going to choke trying to get his words out fast enough. “That’s not stupid, Sirius, it’s not. I promise.”

Sirius looked up again. “You’re sure?”


Sirius nodded to himself and began to slip under the covers, surprising Remus. He hadn’t been particularly physical since he’d come back, and Remus hadn’t wanted to push any boundaries, but now-

Sirius stopped abruptly. “Shit. Shit, I’m sorry, I’ll just-”

Remus hurriedly made more room, pulling the covers back himself. “No, please, stay. I want you to stay.”

Sirius was quiet for a moment, then resumed getting into the bed. “Alright.”

They both laid on their sides for a moment, facing each other and not saying a word. Remus could feel Sirius taking in their closeness, the rise and fall of his chest, the crook of his neck.



Sirius took a deep breath. “Could I… get closer, a little bit?”

The hesitancy in his voice shot through Remus, suddenly making him want to toss his arm around Sirius and hold him forever, breathing in the scent of his hair and finally getting a piece of himself back after so long.

“Of course,” Remus said with a weak grin. “Of course you can.”

Sirius smiled back with a hint of sadness that hadn’t been there before, and then his head was resting under Remus’ chin and his breath was on Remus’ skin and Remus was holding his waist and it was almost as if none of it had happened. This could’ve been any night at school after Sirius’ mother had sent a particularly nasty letter, with their bodies pressed together, comforting one another.

Remus could barely believe it.

And then Sirius was speaking again, just whispers that Remus strained to catch even though they were so close: “I missed you, I missed you, I missed you so much.”

If Remus’ heart hadn’t already broken in the past fourteen years, it definitely did then.

He smoothed a hand over the back of Sirius’ head, shaking slightly. “I know. I know, it’s alright. I missed you too.”

Sirius spoke a little louder now. “I’d look up, and I’d see the stars, and the moon, and I’d think about- god- I’d be so glad you weren’t in there with me, Remus, that you were out here-”

His words broke off and his body began to tremble, and Remus just held on, stroking Sirius’ hair and murmuring, “it’s alright, it’s alright.”

And maybe, in that moment, that wasn’t exactly true. Maybe it wasn’t alright, and maybe it wouldn’t be for a while, but Remus knew that in time, it would be.

Gillovny: An Outsider’s Opinion Part 2

Part 1 in case you missed it

I’m finally posting the rest of mine and Caitlin’s gillovny discussion. Under the cut are Caitlin’s thoughts on ET, the Cutting Room kisses, Gillian’s Huffpost interview and the one you all wanted me to ask her about: the Access Hollywood hallway clip.

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mouseinc-deactivated20170116  asked:

"Send me a number with a ship and any other details you want" - “You’re burning up” for Otayuri (the cutest pair in the world!!) I've seen prompts where Yurio is the one who is sick, but what if this time it is Otabek who is sick and Yurio has to look after his boy ? <3

(Everything for you, my sweet darling! I hope you’ll enjoy it, even with my english)

“Beka, you were awful today!”, Yuri tries to find other words describing his boyfriend’s performance on ice, but even with the soft spot in his heart for that man: it was impossible. “What the fuck is happening to you?”

Opening the door to their house (after half a year it is still so impossibly amazing for Yuri to be able to say that), he is welcomed by unusual silence. Yuri always ends his practice later, and when he comes back he is greeted by music from their room or sounds of cooking from the kitchen. But now, he hears only silence.

“Beka?”, he asks, going to the living room; it’s empty. Bedroom? Only Molniya, their kitten, is sleeping at Yuri’s pillow.

He finally goes to the kitchen and spots the mess of a person with head and arms lying in uncomfortable position on the table, clothes from the practice still unchanged. All of that, connected with the mug for a tea standing next to a kettle, which wasn’t even plugged in, gives Yuri the feel that something is not right.

“Hey”, he touches older man’s arm; Otabek suddenly jumps up, looking feverishly at Yuri. “Oh my god, you look like a corpse!”

“Um…I am okay”, Otabek just says, pushing his messy hair out of the way of his sight. His always shining, gold skin looks almost grey; with bloodshot eyes and unusual redness on his cheeks he looks sick.

“Yeah, bullshit”, Yuri says, getting closer and touching his boyfriend’s forehead with his hand. “Shit, Beka, You’re burning up! Tell me, for real, how do you feel?”, he asks, at the same time walking towards one of the cupboards and pulling out the box with medicines.

“Uh, weak”, he says, rubbing his eyes. “And my head hurts as hell. But it’s nothing, really…”

“When did you start feeling like that?”, Yuri doesn’t even listen to him; his brain switches to ‘I am responsible adult and am 100% able to take care of other human’ mode. He takes out thermometer and puts it under Otabek’s armpit without any word.

“After I woke up, I guess…”

“Are you retarded?!”, Yuri shouts, then instantaneously tones his voice down. “You went to the practice sick?? How irresponsible of you!”, he looks at Otabek with disappointment.

“I didn’t want to loose any practice! And more, I didn’t want to make you troubles”, Beka says quietly, when Yuri checks his temperature. 39,5˚C, not good.

“You’re really stupid if you think it’s problem for me to take care of you”, Yuri responds, pulling his boyfriend’s hair back and placing few gentle kisses on his warm forehead. “Now, go get some pajamas on and to the bed! I’ll prepare meds for you”

When Yuri walks to the room with hot tea, damp cloth and painkillers, Otabek is lying, with awake Molniya trying to find a comfortable place on Beka’s stomach.

“Oh, move”, says Yuri to her, sitting on the end of the bed and giving Otabek’s his meds. “I’m going to put this cloth on your forehead, it should erase the pain for awhile”, he says, looking at half asleep Beka. He smiles, looking at defenceless man.

“Will you lay down with me?”, Otabek asks with so tiny voice that Yuri can’t say no. He puts the small cloth on his boyfriend’s forehead and lays down next to him. At the same time Beka is moving closer to him, putting one arm around his small waist. Yuri allows him to lay on his arm, not even bothered by damp spot on his favorite shirt.

Unconsciously, he moves his fingers up and down the short hair on the back of Otabek’s neck. “You’re my angel, I love you”, he hears, and looks at the man lying on his arm, so warm and beautiful, even with fever and unhealthy blush on sun-kissed cheeks.

“And you should be sleeping”, he answers, but with the delicate tone Otabek recognises as ‘love’.

When Yuri wakes up few hours later, his boyfriend is still asleep, cloth long forgotten on the pillow next to them. Small droplets of sweat are covering his forehead and temples. Yuri leaves too hot embrace and wipes out softly all of the sweat from Otabek’s face. He leaves him to sleep, with the mission of doing some soup in mind.

When Otabek opens his eyes, it’s dark outside. Small ball of fur is lying next to him, puffing out small breathes. His head hurts like hell, and the bed next to him is empty.

It has to be the fever’s fault, because he feels very sad and miserable. He’s still cold, but the throbbing of his temples decreased. He puts sweater on and opens the door, being greeted with the beautiful smell of chicken soup.

Staying on the door to kitchen, Otabek sees Yuri, with his long hair messily tied in a bun, bustling next to the huge pot of vegetables and chicken. He smiles lightly, feeling happiness with the sight of his man, in their shared kitchen.

“Ohh, you woke up?”, Yuri turns back and smiles at him lightly. “How’s your head?”

“It’s okay”, he says, being surprised how broken his voice sounds. “Yura… Give me a hug?”, he says quietly.

“Aww, no way! Go get a shower, you’re sweaty!”, he says, but walks closer anyway and melts into the hug, when Otabek is kissing his hair. “But now for real; dinner’s almost ready, wear some warm clothes”

When Otabek is back, two bowls of soup are standing on a table in front of the TV. Yuri is sitting at the sofa, looking at the phone in his hand, scrolling through Instagram. He looks up and sighs.

“First of all: go get a towel for your hair. Then, put some socks on. Then go here and put a blanket around yourself, we will going to watch some stupid shit and eat.

“Yes, mum”, he laughs.

“Fuck you too”.

Having one cat sleeping on his lap, and the other cuddling to him under the blanket, with their fingers linked together, is something even his throbbing headache isn’t strong enough to screw up for him.

“You are taking care of me so amazingly that I really should be sick more”, he says later, when three of them are almost asleep.

“Oh yeah, I want to see how you say that for Yakov. That old man is probably going to kill you if you find out you’re being sick just to be served”, Yuri laughs, and his laugh is beautiful enough for Otabek to not care about it.

Here's Hoping (part 20)

Summary: Dan and Phil had said ‘I love you’ and contemplate the idea of taking their relationship to the next level

Smut/little fluff

part one, part two, part three, part four, part five, part six, part seven, part eight, part nine, part ten, part eleven, part twelve, part thirteen, part fourteen, part fifteen, part sixteen, part seventeen, part eighteen, part nineteen

Phil smiled up at Dan, his words easing all the nervousness he had been feeling before. He was safe with Dan. He loved him and he knew he wouldn’t do anything to hurt him. He cared about him, and he knew Dan would do everything he could to make this special.

Dan smiled back as he leaned in and gently met their lips together, humming a little as he slid his tongue into Phil’s mouth. Phil gripped at Dan’s hips, a small moan escaping his lips. He did want this.

Dan slid his hand slowly up Phil’s shirt, running it up and down over his chest a few times before pulling it off over his head. Phil followed Dan’s lead, ripping his shirt up and off as well. Dan met his lips again, the contact of their skin together eliciting a moan from both of them.

Phil slid his tongue into Dan’s mouth, digging his fingers into his back to pull him closer to him. He loved the feel of Dan’s body grinding against his. He felt like he could kiss Dan like this forever.

Dan smiled against his lips at Phil’s urgency, moving down to suck at Phil’s neck. He nibbled a bruise, smiling again as he heard Phil’s breath hitch then moved a little lower. He loved that he was going to be Phil’s first. It showed him that there really were people out there that valued love and closeness, and that Phil didn’t just want to use him like everyone else did.

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alittledandy  asked:

Hi, love your handy dandy blog! I'm looking for Destiel fics of any length that stay pretty canon or canon-adjacent, which involves them realising their feelings for one another and feature Dean being very confused about his sexuality and their 'profound bond'. I've looked through your tags and found a couple that fit the bill, but are there any you'd especially recommend? Thanks!

Hi there! Thank you for the compliments, always makes our day to hear that. I think that what you asked for is a pretty basic set-up in non AU Destiel fics, if you don’t count established relationship fics, of course. When wouldn’t Dean be having some issues with himself when he realizes his feelings for Cas? Anyhow, in some ways this was actually a pretty hard question since my brain couldn’t work out the information in what fics Dean is really having some major issues. It sucks when the details of fics keep mixing up, isn’t it? I need to start tagging the fics into my secret folders better so I’ll remember in which fics Dean is really, really having huge gay issues. But, for now, I collected you some of my favorites in which Dean is denying his feelings or doesn’t realize his feelings right away. Hope you’ll enjoy these! – Admin J

Title: The Tunnel of Love

Author: xlodemon

Rating: Explicit

Words: 21,421 – Finished

Admin’s assessment: ★ ★ ★ ★

Admin J’s notes: This is a pretty canon fic. The summary isn’t that promising and I was expecting some brainless fluff with no actual plot or anything, but that wasn’t the deal. This author really thinks every single detail and it got me many times like “oh, yeah, that shit, heh, almost forgot about it”. It’s a good case fic with Dean freaking out because he doesn’t wanna fuck things up with Cas.

Summary: “We might,” Cas starts slowly, pausing like he’s choosing his words. “We might have to kiss.”

Dean just stares at him.

( Read here )

Title: The Story of You and Me

Author: the_diggler

Rating: Explicit

Words: 54,953 – Finished

Admin’s assessment: ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Admin J’s notes: Give a chance for this fic, okay? It might feel not fitting at first but I really think it’s something that will fit into your needs.

Summary: Dean wakes up in a bed next to very human Castiel, and a journal in his own handwriting that tells him it’s two years in the future. The house looks like Bobby’s, and Sam lives there too… He just can’t remember how they got from the angels falling from the sky to comfortable domesticity. While there is much in the journal Dean doesn’t remember, there is much of their story he’s always known. And she settles into the routine of his new life and relationship with Castiel, it quickly becomes something he doesn’t know how to live without.

( Read here )

Title: The Dance of Inanna

Author: PeppermintWind

Rating: Explicit

Words: 106,178 – Finished

Admin’s assessment: ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Admin J’s notes: It’s been awhile since I last time read this fic but if I remember right there was a quite some time before the two actually hook up and the first kiss scene was pretty epic. I sure as hell wish I remember it right, please, correct me if it wasn’t this fic. Or maybe it wasn’t the first kiss. Anyway, the first time Sam and Benny and other guys see them kissing. God, I need more hours a day so I could re-read all my favorites. I need to quit something. Maybe working? I can’t fit school, work and Destiel into my life properly. Work has to go.

Summary: “Hey Sammy? You didn’t happen to start an apocalypse while I was in Purgatory, did you?”

Or:  After the disappearance of the One, pagan gods are fighting over who gets the world. Alliances are forged and broken, Zeus and Enlil form a bromance, Odin teams up with Isis, Loki probably has an evil plan, Artemis ponders second-wave feminism, Crowley is amused, the angels are not, Inanna has opinions, Don is a Carver Edland fan.

And Dean and Cas aren’t fooling anybody.

( Read here )

Title: The Writing on the Wall

Author: DasMervin, MrsHyde

Rating: Explicit

Words: 574,830 –  Finished

Admin’s assessment:  ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Admin J’s notes: Pretty canon until the point Cas becomes God. Or not God, but you know… god. If you want Dean freaking out ‘cause of his gay thoughts for Cas, then this is your choice. I promise you, this will drive you crazy. I was angry, then I was frustrated, then I was angry again. Damn it, Dean!

Summary: How could a homophobic hunter fall for an ex-angel-slash-god wearing a male vessel? Well, just ask Dean Winchester.

( Read here )

Title: How to Date an Angel in 12 Easy Steps

Author: fourthduckling

Rating: Explicit

Words: 23,590 –  Finished

Admin’s assessment:  ★ ★ ★ ★

Admin J’s notes: Okay, maybe this was a less angst and dark than you’d like, but Dean sure has some identity issues and problems with himself. It’s funny and everybody need a bit fun once in awhile.This was actually a pretty hard question, you know? It’s not that easy to pick fics for this.

Summary: It’s not that hard to date an angel. All Dean has to do is fight off hordes of vampires, research gay porn, get sucked into a crappy Narnia, endure Sam’s comments, creep out on Dr. Sexy, get harassed – oh, and that’s right– figure out he’s into Cas. Easy, right?

( Read here )

Title: The Mirror

Author: cloudyjenn

Rating: Explicit

Words: 24,568 –  Finished

Admin’s assessment: ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Admin J’s notes: I know it’s always good when universe wants to tell something to Dean. Always. I love it how frustrated Dean is starting to be after all the realities and how he finally gets it. And I don’t wanna spoil anything, but the ending of this story is so good!

Summary: When Dean touches a strange mirror, he’s whisked away to one alternate reality after another and it doesn’t take him long to realize the universe is trying to tell him something.

( Read here )

Title: The Path of Fireflies

Author: museaway

Rating: Mature

Words: 63,706 –  Finished

Admin’s assessment: ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Admin J’s notes: This is a perfect fic about Dean realizing his own feelings. I have a big thing for amnesia fics and this really is my favorite fic ever. It’s basically head-canon, even though Dean isn’t hunting anymore. However, the things happened in the show are reality, it’s just many years past those hunting years. I love this fic. God bless the author. If you haven’t read it yet, stop whatever it is you’re doing at the moment and read it. And if you have, then, well… Re-read it.

Summary: After his humanity is restored, Dean wakes up bed with Castiel, a wedding ring, and no memory of the past twelve years.

( Read here )

Title: Destiel, Actually

Author: Bloodism

Rating: Explicit

Words: 15,973 –  Finished

Admin’s assessment:  ★ ★ ★ ★

Admin J’s notes: So is there anyone who doesn’t love Gabriel? I’m like the biggest Gabriel fan ever. Seriously, he’s the best dickhead archangel slash trickster slash big brother ever. And when Gabe decides that Dean and Cas are meant to be together, even if the two of them won’t get it, well… Then they will be, no matter what it costs.

Summary: Picture your typical rom-com cliché. Now picture Dean stuck in that rom-com cliché. With Castiel. Because that’s what happening to him - a crazy whirlwind of your typical-and-not-so-typical cliché’s. He’s playing the main lead in all of them and Castiel’s his counterpart. Of course, the culprit is obvious. Gabe’s enjoying himself too much, lying back on his favourite cloud with a tub of salted popcorn.

It was about time someone kicked the two knuckleheads into gear.

“And… ACTION!”

( Read here )

Title: Down Like Water

Author: museaway

Rating: Mature

Words: 14,512 –  Finished

Admin’s assessment:  ★ ★ ★ ★

Admin J’s notes: I wasn’t quite sure if I wanted to rec this here, but why the hell not? Because this is all about Dean and Cas being stupid and not getting together early enough. It’s sad and melancholy, just a perfect museaway fic, and I guess in some ways it fits into what you asked for.

Summary: There’s no time for nerves, no time for second guessing. There’s only right now, and right now he has Cas.

( Read here )

Not In That Way. A Gail x Holly songfic.

Instructions : 1.Go listen to this song (even if you’re not going to read this go listen. You’ll thank yourself later!) 2. Then read :)

A/N: This is quite possibly my favourite song ever I couldn’t stop thinking about Gail and Holly when I listened to it so I wrote a thing. 

A/N 2: Italics are lyrics. I do not own this song. It belongs to Sam Smith.

‘Gail, c'mon, it’s gonna be great!’

'Chloe, it’s kareoke, it is most definitely going to be terrible’

'Holly’s going to be there, and I’m pretty sure she’s going to sing!’

'Holly can sing?’

'Gail are you kidding? Holly is the best singer I know, we used to go camping with all our friends when we were in high school and Holly always brought her guitar and would sing for us. Sometimes she even wrote her own songs. It was amazing’

'I’ve never heard her’

'Gail then you have to come!  I know you like Holly more than you like me, even though I am the mutual friend so you should both want to be my best friend not each others, but you guys clearly get on really well and I want to go out with my friends so please come and I will deal with my insecurities that you guys are going to freeze me out and make me the third wheel’.

'Well fine. I suppose I can make it if Holly’s going to be there. But you should probably invite some other people for when we abandon you’

'Wow thanks Gail’ Chloe responds with a deadpan expression.

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kal-clark  asked:

Okay, so I've started re-watching sailor moon and I'm on the second season, the black moon arc. I'm a bit confused and I thought you would be the best to ask. When Crystal Tokyo forms I know that everyone basically becomes immortal (correct? I hope I'm correct) because of the silver crystal. But did the silver crystal kind of brainwash people into following NQS or just purify the darkness inside of them (I'm so sorry if I sound dumb, I've heard different opinions. And I can not imagine NQS as a

(part 2) dictator.. I know you had an opinion awhile back about a guy who claimed she was, or something. But I’m a bit confused because I know Wiseman had convinced people into rebelling against her because the thought of immortality was unnatural, but after that I’m pretty ignorant when it comes to this arc.

The anime is pretty vague and ambiguous about the whole thing (much like how it’s vague and ambiguous about every single detail about Crystal Tokyo); hopefully the manga can give you a better answer!

(There are other panels, but these three explain the situation the best)

Neo-Queen Serenity used the Silver Crystal to free humanity from their dark impulses, feelings, and thoughts; there is absolutely no indication that she brainwashed them. Rather, it appears that, by purifying the darkness inside everyone’s hearts (like you said), NQS was able to create a utopia because everyone lived peacefully and had no ill will towards anyone. There’s clear evidence in both the anime and manga that the Ginzuishou cannot be used to purify the heart of someone who doesn’t want to be purified; the Ayakashi sisters each had to make the choice to want to be human and live peacefully on Earth before Usagi was able to use the Ginzuishou to heal them. And I don’t know about you, but if someone came along and gave me the opportunity to be free of the darker side of myself, I would accept that option in a heartbeat. 

Anyway, hundreds of years before the 30th Century (anywhere from 2000-2900, I’m guessing), a man calling himself Wiseman revived crime in the peaceful city of Crystal Tokyo, starting a string of murders, theft, and other crimes. He gathered a crew of people who wanted to be bad, and they terrorized the city before NQS appeared and banished them to Nemesis. 

Some people think that it was cruel of her to do that. But really, she only had three options. The first of which, healing them, wouldn’t work, because, as I said above, the Ginzuishou doesn’t work on those who resist purification. So that brings us down to two options: Killing them or banishing them. Neo-Queen Serenity is the adult version of Usagi (which a lot of people seem to forget). There’s no way that she could kill people (even bad people), so she sent them to a place where they couldn’t hurt anyone. She had a duty to her people and her kingdom, and she did the best she could.

Also, like you said, I could not ever imagine Usagi as a dictator. I’ve always had the idea that Crystal Tokyo sort of functions like the modern-day United Kingdom: The Queen remains a very important and influential figure, but she’s more of a symbol than an actual political force. Crystal Tokyo is a democracy and still has elections and the like. Neo-Queen Serenity is their Queen and their protector, but she doesn’t necessarily govern them (I mean, for real, can you imagine Usagi doing politics?).

And finally (this isn’t really something you asked, it’s just a claim I’ve heard beside the whole “NQS is a dictator” thing), the Black Moon Clan aren’t freedom fighters. They're terrorists. They attacked Crystal Tokyo, reducing it to a barren wasteland and slaughtering countless innocent people in the process. Also, they literally kill children. Takeuchi did NOT FUCK AROUND with this shit.

(that last little girl was crying over the dead bodies of her parents, btw)

I do feel for the lower members of Black Moon Clan, whose only original crime was being born to criminal parents on Nemesis, and I love the Ayakashi sisters, but on the whole, I really don’t care for the Black Moon Clan and I don’t see them as victims (it’s a different story in the anime, where most of them are made into much more sympathetic characters, however). Instead of trying to rise above their circumstances and prove that they were worthy of being let back onto Earth, they went the terrorism route and decided to claim Earth for themselves through brutal violence, proving that they really were no better than their ancestors. 

10.14 Coda:

ao3 Link

“Well,” Dean says, pushing away from the table. “I think I’m going to go sleep for four days now.”

“Sounds about right,” Sam replies, a pained smile on his face.

Cas watches, eyes squinting as Dean walks in his direction. He is standing in the doorway that leads down the hall and moves over slightly to allow Dean to pass. A heavy hand lands on his shoulder and he turns his head to look at Dean.

Dean catches his eyes briefly before moving past, hand landing again. “You coming?” he whispers, one last pat accentuating the question.

Cas gives a small nod before Dean walks away. He plans on joining him soon, but wants to talk to Sam first. He hears a door click shut before he calls out to Sam. “How is he?”

“Sam?” He asks again when he gets no response.

“He’s in trouble, Cas,” Sam finally replies, hands curled into fists in front of him.

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"I've always felt this way..."

Calum invited you over for a movie, a usual night for the two of you. You and Cal had an odd relationship; some days the two of you would fuck each other’s brains out then other days go back to being best friends as if nothing happened. “no strings attached” wasn’t really the case between you and Calum. You truly loved each other, but each scared to admit feelings that you were hiding from one another. You sorted through the variety of movies he had stacked high beside his massive TV. To make things a bit awkward, you decided on the movie Friends With Benefits. You smirked and put in the movie as Calum came back into the room with drinks and popcorn, he joined you on the couch. You were already pretty close together sitting on the couch when the movie started, but you needed something to happen so you scouted in closer with your bum to his crotch. You had promised yourself the last time you had hooked up with Calum was the last of going back to friends. You loved Calum, without a doubt you knew he felt the same. It was just easier if you stayed friends. If it was the last thing you do, you were going to admit everything to him. He shifted under your movement and placed his hand on your hip. “What movie did you put in y/n?” Calum asked with a bit of excitement, he really did enjoyed spending time with you. You turned your face in Calum’s direction, “Um, that one with Justin Timberlake, when they have a lot of sex as just friends but can’t handle the emotions and finally confess their feelings for each other.” You were trying your hardest to break him. “Oh, yeah… with Mila Kunis. Yeah she’s quite fit!” You nodded as to say you agree. As the movie progressed, you became restless. You made yourself sit tight until the sex scenes came up, that’s when you were planing to make your move. Calum made a swift movement to turn away from you and you felt his hard sex on your bum. Which in return made you giggle to yourself. “You alright cal?..” you tried to say in the most smart ass way. “Uh… Yeah.. I’m going to the bathroom.” Calum briskly got up and rushed down the hall. You stayed seated continuing on with the movie. You heard muffled moaning from the bathroom, your mind could only imagine the scene that was happening. “(y/n)…argh” your eyes widen and Calum let out a few more gasps. You couldn’t help yourself,so you got up and before walking down the hall to Calum, you decided you’d remove your bra just to get things a little more heated. The lacy piece of fabric fell to the ground and the cold air made your nipples hard, obviously showing through your t shirt. “Calum…” You whisper yelled and lightly tapped on the door. You could feel the tension that was just between the thin door. “Oh um.. (y/n) wait hang on… i” he shuffled and before he could get situated you pushed the door open to a half dressed Calum. “Oh” he breathed out. “just couldn’t help yourself, could you cal. touching yourself you naughty boy you” you were surprised at your own words even after they came out. They’d taken the both of you back, but only seemed to turn you on even more. Calum licked his bottom lip and let go of his jeans. “it’s just, you looked so fucking good tonight and..” His eyes found your thinly covered breasts, perky and all. He smirked and looked darkly at you through his eyelashes. “Well you know I could’ve helped with that.” You moved closer and grabbed his arm. Calum lightly touched your cheek and looked disappointed, “I’m done with just sex and acting like I have no feelings for you (y/n)! I know damn well we both feel the same.” The two of you both stay there, quiet. “I lo-… I am in love with you (y/n)” You moved your lips to his and it was one of the most passionate kisses you’ve ever experienced. It wasn’t about sex anymore, it never had been, you were both in love with each other. The kiss became more heated, everything moving slower than usual. “I want to make love to you (y/n), not just quick, rough sex” he attached his lips back to yours. You nodded in agreement and slipped your hand into his boxers to massage his harden length. Calum moaned into your mouth, whilst his hands roamed your body. You broke away, causing Calum to whimper a bit. You pulled him by his hand into the bedroom beside the bathroom. You walked backwards until the back of your legs hit the bed. Calum tugged on your shirt, allowing him to take it off you raised your arms. He threw the thin fabric to the floor and kissed down your neck, collarbones to your breasts. You sat on the bed and pulled at his boxers; Calum shimmied out of them. Leaving you to be the only one partially half dressed. You both smiled, you couldn’t be more happy in that moment. You slipped your panties off and Cal took some time to take your body in. “Beautiful as always..” he whispered. He parted your legs with his own and continued to give attention to your breast now above you. After awhile, his calloused fingers found your heat; causing you to gasp a bit. Calum smirked and began to work his fingers, just teasing never entering you. Still making out, you couldn’t take it anymore. “Enough teasing cal, I need you. I want you to make love to me.” That was all you needed to say and Calum was lining himself up with your core. “Are you ready, babe?” Calum looked straight into your eyes, you nodded and kissed his plump lips. Calum thrusted once, giving you time to adjust to his size. “It’s okay, you can move.” You assured him and placed your hands on his neck and shoulder. Cal smiled his famous smile that won you over in the first place. “Please move!” You laughed out. “I just want to enjoy this moment (y/n).” He almost pulled out all the way, before slowly inching himself back into you. “oh goD. Calum as good as this feels, I need you to speed up!” With that he picked up a steady pace and you could feel that familiar knot in your stomach growing. His thumb found your most sensitive area and rubbed figure eights. This only sending your body over the edge. “Ca-lum I’m going to c-um” You managed to get out. “Let go (y/n).” With those three words you became undone under him. Your walls clenched around Calum, not soon after he released in you. Both sweaty and worn out, Calum pulled out and laid beside you. He wrapped his arms around you and snuggled you into him. “I love you Calum, I always have.” You kissed just below his jaw and lay there enjoying the bliss of that moment. His grip around you tightened and the two of you fell asleep.

Allergy - Baekhyun Scenario

Heyo, this is the first one of that random word thing that I’m doing! I decided to do it in alphabetical order, so here’s first! I don’t really know what I’m gonna write, so here goes!

The dull sound of your fingers tapping against the dresser resounded throughout the rather empty room as you stared down at your drawers, trying to decide what to do. Logically, you knew you coudn’t do this, but there was no way in hell you were going to let down Baekhyun. He was so excited, and you didn’t want to disappoint him. Besides, you could handle a bit of sun … right?


You burrowed yourself deeper against Baekhyun’s chest as you stared numbly as the television. It had been such a boring day for the two of you, since he was too tired to do much, and you … well you couldn’t exactly go outside much, could you? Not when you had Photosensitivity. 

It sounded made up, didn’t it - like something out of a science fiction novel? How can someone be allergic to the sun? It was ridiculous, and you knew that all too well; that was why you hadn’t told Baekhyun yet about your condition. It was kind of hard to avoid going outside, and you hated having to make up excuses not to go places with him unless it was later in the afternoon or nighttime. 

Baekhyun shifted underneath you, and you moved your head to look up at him curiously. “What is it?” you asked, and the corners of his mouth twitched upwards slightly. 

“I have an idea.”

“Of what?” you prodded, sitting up. 

He let out a small sigh before following you in sitting up, scratching at the back of his head and flashing you a cute smile. “I know you don’t like to swim, but, just once, can we go swimming? It’s supposed to be a really nice day tomorrow, and I want to spend it doing something fun with you.”

Your eyes slid off to the side. This is what you hated, having to tell him lies like this. In all honestly, you loved swimming, ever since you were a kid. But the way you were now, you could only do it if it was inside. And knowing him, he’d want to take you to a water park, filled with sunlight. “I really can’t,” you tried. “I just don’t like it.”

When your eyes flicked back to him, he was flashing you his classic puppy pout, his lip quivering and his eyes watery. “Please,” he begged, and you felt a pang in your heart at the pleading tone in his voice. “I promise that I’ll take you somewhere you really want to go the day after that, but tomorrow can we go to the waterpark?”

For a long time, you stared at him, looking him up and down as your chest began to feel tighter. For all it was worth, you honestly did want to go, but you just … it wasn’t going to happen. 

Unless …

“Fine,” you agreed quietly, letting out a small sigh as his face lit up. You felt your lips tug at a smile, and he jumped forward, encasing you in a bear hug.

“Thank you, y/n,” he breathed into your ear, squeezing you tightly. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” you murmured back. Slowly, the smile faded as you thought of what you’d just gotten yourself into . .. 


A groan escaped your throat as you burrowed through your drawers, trying to find the least-revealing swimsuit you had. The most you had was a thick-strapped bikini, and you silently cursed yourself for not thinking ahead and going to buy a bathing suit last night. You pulled out the drawer further, finding a cover up and pull up out. Your eyes flicked between the two pieces, thinking quickly. Maybe if you put on some jeans, you could cover up as much as possible. 

After a while, you’d finally gotten dressed. You decided to wear jeans and a cover up over your swimsuit in an attempt to cover up as much skin as possible, and your head was adorned with a wide-brimmed had and large sunglasses. You had already lathered yourself in tons and tons of sunscreen, and made sure to put it everywhere. 

Checking your bag one more time to make sure you’d packed everything, including not only your phone, wallet, and keys, but sunscreen as well, you opened the door to your room, peeking out into the living room. 

At the sound of the door opening, Baekhyun’s head popped up. “Why are you wearing so much?” he asked as he stood up, slinging a drawstring bag over his shoulder and making his way to meet you in the hallway. A frown stretched across his face as he came up to you, pulling of your sunglasses. You recoiled at the action, trying to grab the glasses, but he raised them above his head instead. “You don’t need these y/n,” he reasoned, holding them even higher. 

“Give those back!” you demanded, but he just laughed instead. After a few seconds of trying, you stood back, your demeanor totally serious.

The expression on his face changed as he saw your eyes boring into him, and he handed them back gently. “Sorry,” he mumbled, grabbing your hand and pulling you towards the door. 

Quickly, you put the glasses back on your face, making sure that they covered as much as possible. With a sigh, you followed him obeying. This was going to be a long day …

This wasn’t at all how you expected it to turn out. 

You sat on a lawn chair underneath a large umbrella, your knees tucked under your chin as you watched Baekhyun with a somber expression on your face. You wanted to swim so bad, but you knew that you couldn’t. A pout graced your lips as we played around in the water, splashing back and forth. 

To be honest, it would be a lot different if he wanted to do something that didn’t involve water. If he wanted to go on a walk or something, sure, you could manage that. But water … the sun is at its worst in the water. So all you could do was watch as he bounced around, a giddy smile on his face. 

All of a sudden his gaze flicked up at you as we swung his hands back and worth in a big wave. You raised your hand, giving a half-hearted flick of your wrist before tucking your head further against your knees. 

Before you knew it, he had run up to where you were sitting and plopped down in the chair beside you. “Why don’t you come swim?” he pleaded, nudging your arm gently. “You’ll have a lot more fun out there than sitting here pouting.”

You weighed your options; either sit here, alone, while your boyfriend enjoyed himself to the fullest extent, or go out there, while risking breaking out in hives, all for the sake of fun. Somehow, the later won over, due in part to the adorable face he was giving you. 

“Fine,” you conceded, reaching into your bag and pulling out the sunscreen. “Let me put this on first.”


“I care about my skin,” you lied. “And so should you.”

He nodded in agreement, but didn’t reach for the bottle. “You’re probably right, but I’m too lazy to put in on for myself.” He paused, and you looked up at him expectantly, waiting for him to finish. “Unless you’ll put it on for me,” he suggested, flashing a sly grin. 

“Shut up,” you laughed, smacking him softly. “Go wait in the pool, I’ll be over there in a bit.” With a quick nod, he ran over to the water, laughing as he went. 

Left to your own devices, you stripped down to your baithing suit underneath and put on a thick layer of sunscreen. As you looked down at your exposed body, you let out a sigh. You were confident in your figure, but not confident in the inevitable. 

A few hours later, you’d totally forgotten about your condition. 

It’s really surprising how spending so much time with Baekhyun could make you forget about your worries. You were absorbed in his smile, as he was for you. The two of you ran around the park together, going from wave pools, to lazy rivers, and everything else in between. 

As you waded in the pool at the end of the single waterslide, you started to feel an odd tingling on your back, but dismissed it immediately. It was probably just your bathing suit riding up on your back. 

Your eyes caught Baek zooming out of the waterslide nearest you, and you let out a loud laugh at the terrified look on his face before he fell into the water. You waded over to him, grabbing his arm as he jumped out of the water. “Are you okay?” you asked, trying to subdue your giggles when his wild eyes looked up at you. 

“I didn’t like that one,” he mumbled, and you chuckled slightly. 

“Okay, we won’t ride those again. Let’s go back tot he wave pool,” you suggested, turning around and starting to pull him after you. However, he didn’t move, but stayed glued to the spot. “Baekhyun?” you called, turning your head slightly to see him staring at your back. “What is it?” you asked as you tried to turn around, but he shook his head, grabbing your shoulders and turning you away from him. 

“Don’t turn around,” he commanded, and you obeyed, a confused look crossing your face. You felt his cold fingers against your skin, and then all of a sudden you felt a sharp pain on your back. With a yelp you jumped away, whipping around to face him. 

“What is it? What did you do?” you commanded, but he just shook his head. 

“I don’t know. Did you hurt yourself on the waterslide?” he asked, trying to look at your back again. 

“No! What do you-” you broke off as you realized what it was. The tingling that you felt earlier, and the pain when he touched it. “Oh no,” you mumbled, before breaking into a run towards the area of chairs. 

You’d forgotten to put your sunscreen back on. 

You weaved in and out of the crowd of people, wincing every time you bumped into someone and whispering a quick apology before continuing running again. Since you’d forgotten to put sunscreen on again, it had worn off, leaving you exposed to the sun and it’s harmful rays. Now, all you could do was take an antihistamine and hope for the best. 

Finally you reached the beach chair where your stuff lay, almost running into it as you slid onto the concrete ground. You bit your lips as you felt your knees slit open, but you didn’t have time to worry about it. 

Behind you, you could hear Baekhyun’s footsteps as he caught up to you. Oh god, he couldn’t see you like this. Quickly, you grabbed a towel, throwing it over you to cover your back. You bit down a scream at the touch - it felt like someone was grating your skin whenever something touched the welts. But you had to cover them up; you couldn’t let Baekhyun see. 

Tears were streaming down your face now, both from the pain in your knees and back as well as frustration. You kept digging through your bag, but you couldn’t find your pills. With a frustration growl you flipped the back over, spilling the contents all over the ground. Baekhyun was behind you now, and you could hear him talking to you. However, you couldn’t reply. You needed to find your antihistamines. 

Your hands scrabbled all over the ground, to the point that they were scratched and bloody. Now you were sobbing - you couldn’t even see the ground now, your vision was so blurry from the tears. You felt yourself double over, his head touching the ground. “I can’t … find them …” you choked. “I can’t find the pills.”

All of a sudden, Baekhyun was beside you, holding your shoulders gently as he raised you up. “We need to go to the hospital, don’t we?” he questioned. You tried to reply, but all you could manage was a slight not. 

You heard him sigh, and you started to cry harder. You knew this would happen, and know, thanks to you, his day was ruined. “I’m sorry, Baekhyun,” you sobbed, rubbing your eyes and ducking your head. “I’m really sorry. Please don’t be mad.”

“Shh, shh, it’s okay, it’ll all be okay,” he murmured, carefully pulling you against his chest and rubbing your arm. “C’mon, let’s go.” He began to gather the things around you, putting them into your bag. You tried to help, but he kept stopping you gently, giving your hand a soft squeeze before going back to cleaning up. Tears continued to stream down your face as one thought echoed throughout your mind:

It was your fault

After a few minutes, Baekhyun had everything in one arm, his other holding your hand tightly as he led you through the mob of people. He tried his best to shield you from anyone bumping into you, but every time you let out a small shriek of pain, you could tell he was biting back the urge to fight whoever hurt you. 

Finally, you reached the parking lot, where he helped you into the car. As he climbed into his side, he noticed you leaning with your head against the dashboard, your arms shaking slightly. “Y/n?” he called. “Do you want me to take the towel off of your back?” When he received a shake of your head in reply, his expression softened. It hurt so much to look at you right now, especially when he knew that it was his fault. He should have realized that something was wrong sooner, rather than forcing you to do things you didn’t want to do. 

Putting the car into drive, he pulled out of the parking lot and speeding towards the hospital. Horns and shouts followed him down the highway as he ignored every red light and stop sign he could. He wanted you to be rid of your pain as soon as possible, and if that meant getting a ticket, then so be it. 

You bit your lip, your eyes boring into the ground. You were sitting on one of the hospital beds in the emergency room, with a doctor standing behind you, looking carefully at your back. Your eyes drifted up to Baekhyun, who’s gaze was filled with worry. Tears brimmed your eyes at the sight of him, but you looked away quickly so he wouldn’t see. 

After a moment, the doctor stood up, coming around to sit in a stool in front of you. You could feel her eyes boring into you, and, slowly, you brought yourself to look at her. She let out an angry sigh, setting the clipboard in her hand on the floor beside her. “I don’t usually get mad at a patient,” she began, and you cast your gaze back to the ground in shame, “But you’re obviously a different case.”

“I’m sorry” you mumbled. 

“I’m sure you are,” she shot back. “I swear, I haven’t seen a reaction as bad as this in a long time.”

Just then, Baekhyun’s waved his hand quickly, drawing the attention of both you and the doctor. “Excuse me,” he chimed in, “But, what do you mean by reaction?”

You and the doctor shared a glance, and you shifted uncomfortably, covering your face with your hands. “Has she not told you?” the doctor asked, knowing the answer. 

“Told me what?”

Oh god, you just wanted to hide. You wanted to hide and forget that any of this happened, let alone that he was about to learn something you never wanted him to know. 

“Y/n has a rare form of an already rare allergy, known as Solar Urticaria,” the doctor answered immediately. “Most simply put, it’s allergy to the sun.”

There was a long pause, until Baekhyun mumbled, “The … the sun? How is that possible?”

The doctor shrugged. “To be blunt, no one knows. No one has been able to figure out yet why it happens, all we know it that it does. Y/n here knows that she’s not supposed to be in the sun for long period of time, even with sunscreen. The fact that she didn’t reapply it made it even worse. We’ve given her antihistamines to calm the hives, but seeing as how it’s already night time, and it could take a few hours for the medicine to kick in, I want you to stay overnight.” You lifted your head, giving her an incredulous look. 

“There’s no way in hell,” you growled. “I’m tired of waiting around in hospitals like this. I’m going home.”

“No,” she said, more stern this time. “It’s your fault that you’re in the hospital this time. Look, I’ll even let your boyfriend stay here with you, but you’re not leaving until I clear you to go.” With that, she stood up and left the room. 

With her gone, an air of silence blanket the room. You didn’t want to look up, because you didn’t want to face him and the inevitable questions. 

After a moment, in a smallest voice, he asked, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because,” you began, letting out a bitter laugh, “It would ruin everything.”

“How so?”

“Think of all the things that normal couples do, that I can’t,” you said. “Think of all the amusement parks, the beaches, the parks that couples go to, but I can’t.” You bit your lip angrily as tears began to stream down your face. “How could I do that to you? How could I deny you all those things?”

He didn’t reply immediately, but instead let you cry. God, he knew you needed to cry, just like he always knew everything else about you. Everything but this. 

“None of that matters.”

You looked up, seeing his soft expression as a faint smile graced his lips. You could tell that he was trying not to cry. “All that matters is that I’m with you. God, if you had told me, I would never have taken you there. You know how important you are to me, and if being with you means not going to some stupid water part, do you really think I’m going to care?”

You sniffed loudly, rubbing at your eyes. “I guess not,” you murmured, laughing quietly. “I’m sorry I ruined today for you.”

“No,” he said, standing up from the chair and sitting beside you on the bed. His hands cupped your face, turning it to face him as he planted a kiss on your forehead. As he pulled you into a gently hug, he rocked you back and forth comfortingly. “You didn’t ruin it. I got to see you smile a lot today, and that’s all I need.”

With your head pressed into the crook of his neck, a smile crept across your face. “I love you,” you said, your words muffled by the fabric of his shirt. 

“I love you too,” he replied. “More than any old water park.”


written for hoperaiweek

protection; au-ish? could basically be a continuation to this

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