It’s the experience of not knowing what to do. Having fun is a foreign concept as a kid. Your idea of fun is playing grown-up games. In particular I loved to play Animal Crossing because I could own a house, pay my mortgage, talk to my neighbors, and fish. It was the fun of being responsible. It was the fun of knowing that life isn’t all about having fun. In fact, I almost never had experiences. I was too scared to ask my parents. I felt like fun was something other people could have. I felt like creativity was meant for others. Relationships were meant to be for the long-haul. Saturn whispers in your ear that if it isn’t long-lasting, don’t do it. You’ll regret it later. So you ball up into yourself thinking that it’s best to keep to yourself and not do anything crazy. You don’t realize you’re robbing your young self of experiences.
Or are you?
Because Saturn teaches you that it’s ok to have fun once everything else is done. You can enjoy life when you have attended to all of your duties. As you grow, he smiles encouragingly as you take the first steps into experiencing all that this life has to offer. You go out to parties with knowledge floating in the back of your head that will keep your night spectacular. There will be no near-death experiences for you. Your relationships will be serious in nature because you seek out those who are serious as well. You skip the heartbreak and go straight to the soulmate style love because Saturn told you to wait. Keep your head down. Don’t go after the playboy. Your art will have a lasting quality that will stand the test of time because you took your time. You placed your love, your heart, your soul into it. Saturn took notice. He knew you could handle the lesson he wanted to teach you.
These matters, my most dread and dear sovereign, have deeply pierced me, to find after so many displeasures procured toward me since my unfortunate arrival here, and yet having received sundry comfortable and gracious letters from you, that now in the latter end of my dangers and travails, suffered only for your service, that your Majesty will be so easily incensed against me, and to condemn me even in the worst degrees, as may appear by the words of your heavy writing here set down, not altogether so hard as they be under your own hand. God defend I should live justly to deserve it; for the hope of my life hath been the favour of your Majesty; but what worse conceit can be imagined than to be careless, negligent and improvident in so weighty a place and service as your Majesty hath placed me; to cast away your people, and vainly to consume your treasure; to condemn magistrates and seek popularity; but my trust is, the Lord hath not quite cast me out of your grace, loving you, fearing you, and caring for you as much and as loyally as any subject, not in England alone but under heaven doth his prince. And therefore my prayer to God is to put in your heart to judge according to that he knoweth in my heart; and your Majesty graciously, princely and indifferently to hear my cause and weigh it according to the fact of my deserts. And will crave pardon that I thus boldly have sought to satisfy you upon the grievous conceit I found in your letter of me; lying more heavily at my heart than all the worldly griefs else could have done. And so in most humble and faithfullest manner kiss the feet of your sacred Majesty. (x)