Things have changed...

The moment when you realize you’ve probably lost all your friends cause they don’t care what happens to you anymore, that no one would care if I was gone tomorrow probably, not being accepted ever, no one cares till its too late

I used to think that you not liking me back was a phase. That eventually, like in all the books I’ve read, you would come around and see that we were meant to be. Except, you never did. You drifted away without me realizing. I only remember seeing you laughing with another girl and noticing how much you lit up around her. Something you never did around me. It was then that it hit me. Life isn’t a fairytale. Our love will never prevail. And you not liking me isn’t a phase, it’s a painful eternity.

Excerpt from a book I’ll never write #3


Baby I’m sorry.
I’m sorry I’m so fat
I’m sorry I’m so ugly.
I’m sorry I hardly talk to you
I’m sorry I hardly stay happy.

And on that note,
Baby I’m sorry.
I’m sorry I’m so sad
I’m sorry I’m so angry.
I’m sorry I’m so alone
I’m sorry I’m so difficult.
I’m sorry I push you away.

I’m sorry I find it difficult to tell you,
How much you mean to me
I’m sorry I find it difficult to be myself,
How I want to be around you
I’m sorry I find it difficult to show you,
How much I need you

I’m sorry I’m annoying
I’m sorry I can’t write poetry
I’m sorry I can’t speak other languages,
I’m sorry I can’t say broccoli properly
I’m sorry I can’t do forward roles -
Or backward rolls for that matter.
I’m sorry I’m nothing special, in fact,
I’m sorry I’m nothing at all.

I’m sorry I’m a mistake
I’m sorry I’m a bother
I’m sorry I’m a mess
I’m sorry I’m a pain
I’m sorry I’m alive
I’m just so sorry

I’m so sorry I’m so needy
I’m so sorry I’m so pathetic
I’m so sorry I’m still here.

I’m sorry.

—  10:37pm