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The Signs as Al Swearengen Quotes
  • Aries: I wouldn’t trust a man that wouldn’t try to steal a little.
  • Taurus: Say what you’re gonna say or prepare for eternal fucking silence.
  • Gemini: Welcome to fucking Deadwood!
  • Cancer: Pain or damage don’t end the world, or despair, or fucking beatings. The world ends when you’re dead.
  • Leo: Here’s my counteroffer to your counteroffer: go fuck yourself.
  • Virgo: Every fucking beating I’m grateful for. Every fucking one of them.
  • Libra: You would not want to be staring like that at me.
  • Scorpio: You can’t cut the throat of every cocksucker whose character it would improve.
  • Sagittarius: Announcing your plans is a good way to hear god laugh.
  • Capricorn: Change ain’t looking for friends. Change calls the tune we dance to.
  • Aquarius: In life you have to do a lot of things you don’t fucking want to do. Many times, that’s what the fuck life is...one vile fucking task after another.
  • Pisces: Loopy fucking cunt.