i'm tagging you cause you're going to be like what the shit

okay people sit down and get comfy ‘cause we need to have a talk

Now as you all know, Tracer was confirmed just yesterday to be gay and the way they revealed this was by having her kiss her cute as a button girlfriend. It’s a day for celebration because not only was this what a lot of people wanted/have been saying since Day 1, but it also means that a multi-billionaire company with the hottest triple A game of the year not only recognizes the LGBT community and implements it in the lore of said game, but also that she is the very face of said game.

It’s huge. Big day for all the gays around.

Well, so it would seem.

Now unfortunately most of those who had previously shipped Tracer with someone else (and I’m specifically calling out the widowtracer shippers) are a bit disappointed. That’s fair. I was a little upset that Tracer has a girlfriend already, but I’ve known from the start of shipping widowtracer that there was only a 0.2% chance of it ever being canon. 

But it’s okay to be upset. It’s okay to want to ignore that part of canon and still focus on widowtracer. Multi-shipping isn’t for everyone. And that’s a-okay.

But then some people do things that’s not a-okay. Like asking artists to draw Widowmaker hurting Emily. Or writing about stuffing Emily dead in a fridge and leaving her for Tracer to find (it’s a legitimate fic but I won’t provide the link).

Like, what the actual fuck you guys? We can’t even have a nice thing for one day before you all decide to act like you don’t got any goddamn common sense about you.

Emily does not deserve to be treated this way. I don’t care if you don’t like her. I don’t care if she gets in the way of your other Tracer ships. Emily does not deserve to be treated this way. She makes Tracer happy. She’s done nothing wrong.

And moving past this point, to all who are making this automatically about shipping I have the feeling you don’t understand the magnitude of what has actually happened here. 

Tracer, the mascot of Overwatch, the very poster child herself that is on every box sold, is the icon of the game, is the most and easiest character to recognize from one of the most successful triple A games this year and is seen in every advertisement, has a statue of herself at the Blizzard office, and most definitely one of the most popular characters of the game is gay. The face of Overwatch is a sapphic woman…..like it’s honestly so mind-blowing and monumental that this has happened in such a positive light with such a world renown game, giving us the representation we’ve so badly wanted.

And you guys are….making this about shipping. So much to the point where you’re apparently so angry at Tracer’s canon gf that you want to prove a point by showing her hurt or dead because in your minds, Tracer only belongs with Widowmaker? Like, that’s honestly what it looks like and you guys need to C H I L L.

And I feel like I’m going to get the argument that “Oh but it would be in character for Widowmaker to hurt Emily”.

Yeah. If it were part of a mission and Talon told her to do it because of that age old trope where the hero’s weakest spot is the people they love. That would make total sense.

But because she’s jealous? Now you guys are being cruel. 

And yeah, I’d understand if you all did it or wrote it in a way where, yes, Widowmaker hurts Emily because of jealousy and portrayed it in a bad BAD way. If you made it clear that you do not condone Widowmaker’s actions and recognize them as cruel and evil.

But y’all don’t. You do it because you want Widowmaker to have some sort of control over Tracer’s relationships as a way of bringing Tracer closer to her and painting it in a positive light because “hey I ship widowtracer not tracer and that bitch”.

And that’s really, really not okay guys.

  • Mom: Why are you always staring off into the distance? Are you okay? What are you thinking?
  • Me: A month without uploading he comes back with a tag (whoo)
  • That no one even tagged him he's not a challenge to drag (ouch)So prepare for an attack and by that I mean cringe (cringe)Cause this motherfucker's 'bout to get dragged by his fringe First things first, you're freakishly tall it's weird you look like a noodle (true)You've got hair that was cool in 2007 and wet you just look like a poodle (hobbit)Throw in a really annoying posh voice and, yup, that's Dan (posh)
  • You're what would happen if Winnie the Pooh fucked Slenderman
  • You procrastinate making videos, cause being judged is scary? (ooh)You're so close to being forgotten, the hate's imaginary (whoa)The only reason you get views is you're another white guyThat people ship with his friend cause they think it's kawaii Oh Reasons why Dan's a fail (Yay!)I'll give you some
  • You never tweet, you overeat, all you do is cry and sleep
  • Your jokes are shitposts and memes with no originality (uh huh)Your family's sad you flopped your law degree at university And anything embarrassing that's from your past you just delete You were vegan for like three weeks, then what, you missed the meat? (milk)Wow, I'm so impressed by your clear moral integrity! You try so hard to be peaceful and diplomatic
  • But can't make toast without tumblr saying you're problematic (boo, oh)I could go on there's more if I check
  • There's more things on this list than chins on your neck
  • On your birthday you joked you were a quarter way to death
  • A 100? Yeah, when getting out of bed makes you out of breath? (real)So your celebrity crush was J-Law but now it's Evan P.? (mhmm)What the fuck even is your sexuality?
  • It's hard to put you in a box when you keep it so blurry (what is it)I think it's just to hide that you're secretly a furry
  • I'm-I'm joking obviously Okay that went deep... Repress it? Yup! Before I start crying let's wrap this shit up
  • I'm gonna go and masturbate, then cry into a slice of pizza (feelings)Shout out to the other youtubers especially Ryan Higa (jerk)A cringe compilation mixed with cultural appropriation Met with no depreciation it's the YouTube nation Click subscribe, if you wanna watch 4 videos a year! (or 3)
  • To see my last one (from 10 years ago), just click over here (fail)So leave a comment with your reaction, you can call me a liar Cause you just witnessed the roast of danisnotonfire
  • [Sobbing]
2015 in a nutshell
  • If you’re reading this it’s too late. It was a long tiiime ago in a galaxy far, far away, and these are their stories.
  • Me: hello... it's me. i'm auditioning for the role of right shark and i'll be singing hotline bling. you’ve heard of rickrolls, now get ready for george glass… with a gun. Young man, I know he ate a cheese / I said, young man, Dan Nicky your JOHN CENA
  • Rihanna: *winks*
  • Glunkus: 👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌th 👌 ere👌👌👌 right✔there ✔✔if i do ƽaү so my self 💯 i say so 💯 thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ💯 👌👌 👌НO0ОଠOOOOOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ👌 👌👌 👌 💯 👌 👀 👀 👀 👌👌Good shit
  • Steve Harvey: you’re too hot, hot damn (Taylor Swift™ No copyright infringement intended. Property of TAS LLC management 2012©). you know who else is beautiful? zoobe.
  • Coppy: we are Straight Outta boc (bread of color) so have a sinnamon snoll (snail roll)!
  • Poot: I’m the untoasted bread discourse and i still get sausage
  • Psychic: *reading Putin's mind* wake up chad. listen. those feudal handmaidens are lesbians *closes buzzfeed* #thisgeneration
  • Iggy: *freestyles spongebob gothic*
  • Me: Charlie, Charlie, are you there? [uses hands as microphone] My interests are very singular. *takes a deep breath* I lo-
  • You: yes, you love the signs as concepts, we know, you love them so much, especially *takes a closer look at smudged writing on snout* pal gals, psychic ford rail jaundice, and nyan generous evaluation, the first meme of 2015, they’re the light of your life, we KNOW you’re a kid you’re a squid and Dick Cheney can't melt steel beams. WE GET IT
  • Me: There you are. (raising voice slightly to be heard) oi mate u fancy a cheeky Nando’s?
  • *20 minutes into stealing human bones and chill*
  • Me: What are thoooose?
  • You: white and gold minion shoes *trips* *thousands of photos of Tubbs in a Down with Cis shirt eating coleslaw spill out of your pockets* what haha these aren’t- *desperately trying to gather them as more fall out* I’m holding these for someone else I swear!
  • Me: *shoving breadsticks into purse* I gotta go
  • You: okay… that sounds fake but okay
  • Shakira’s hips: As a lesbian… supporter who respects creative integrity and intellectual property, I am disgusted.
  • Me: Son of a
  • You: You are mean to me you insult me and you dont appreciate anything that i
  • Me: i’m a jaded teenage girl. i’ve been through shit that you wouldn’t even dream of.
  • You: Why you always lyin mmmmmm
  • Me: You said you found a wallet on the ground with like $1,000 dollars in it. I said bitch where? You said under all those rare Pepes. I said bitch where?
  • You: I McFreakin’ lost it!
  • Me: And quit telling everyone I’m dead!
  • You: Buy my silence. Permanently. For $8,000 a month, I will stop.
  • Me: why?
  • You: you gotta. JUST DO IT
  • You: I didn’t get no sleep ‘cause of y’all
  • Me: how many times must you kink shame me under my own roof? hoe don't do it
  • Me: oh my god. “not all men” you're right. Paul Blart: Mall Cop would never do this.
  • You: Tony, what’s good?
  • Me: *spits at you* effective.
  • Power
  • لُلُصّبُلُلصّبُررً ॣ ॣh ॣ ॣ
  • *title card* Captain America: Civil War

A Miracle

Rating: Mature

Warnings: No Warnings Apply

Fandom(s): Shingeki no Kyojin|Attack on Titan

Category: F/M

Relationship(s): Mikasa Ackerman/Levi

Characters: Mikasa Ackerman, Levi, Erwin Smith

Additional Tags: Levi is kinda stubborn, but he accepts Mikasa’s help after she keeps pestering him

Word Count: 1887

You can read on AO3.

Summary: Mikasa can’t help but to be worried about Levi when he continues to fight the titans after he injured his ankle.


“Heichou, wait!”

Her protests were ignored, and the raven-haired male continued to slaughter the titans that he saw. He wasn’t even supposed to be on this mission, but he suddenly appeared towards the end of the fight, helping out the Commander and his squad.

After he took down two seven meter titans, he landed in a nearby tree. He tried his best not to land on his ankle, but he did anyway, and that caused him to wince in pain. He looked down to see Mikasa glaring at him. He rolled his eyes, then asked her, “Why the hell are you looking at me like that, Ackerman?”

“You’re out here, fighting on a sprained ankle!  Don’t you know you’re disobeying the Commander’s orders?” She said. 

“You all would’ve been carrying back corpses if it weren’t for me stepping in!” He retorted. “Besides, I followed you guys out here on my horse, so it wasn’t that hard to find you. I couldn’t let my team fight alone.”

She let out a sigh, then looked out on the field. She saw that the group had started to head back towards the wall already. “We should probably get going. It’s going to get dark soon.” The ravenette looked back up at him.

He matched her gaze, then let out a small sigh. “Fine, I’m coming down.”

“Just be-”

As she spoke, Levi had used his maneuver gear to get off of the large tree branch. One of the grapples hooked onto the tree, but the other one still had tree bark in it, so it didn’t hook on correctly, which resulted in him tumbling towards the ground.

“-careful, Heichou..”

Mikasa got off her horse, and rushed over to Levi. He attempted to get up on his own, but his damn ankle wouldn’t allow him to. He saw her hand had outstretched to him, but he refused to accept her help. He wanted to feel independent. “I’m fine.”

“No you’re not! You can’t even get up without being in pain!”

He glared at her. “I said I’m fine, Ackerman. Now move out of my way.

The ravenette didn’t budge. She stared down at him, her arm still outstretched to him to offer her hand. “Just let me help you, Heichou.” She said, softly.

He was going to refuse once more, but then he remembered that she was the one who caused him to get a sprained ankle. He let out a sigh, then grabbed onto her hand and pulled himself up. 

Levi attempted to walk, but he almost lost his balance, until Mikasa caught him by his arm.

“Stop being stubborn and let me help.” She said to him as she put his arm around her neck, so that he could lean onto her and off of his ankle. He wasn’t trying to at first, but he realized that he did need her help, then took her advice and put some of his weight onto her.

“I really don’t need your help,” Levi said in a low tone.

“Says the person that almost fell over trying to walk,” She said back to him. It was a small pause before she spoke again. “I also wanted to take this time to apologize for getting you injured. I shouldn’t have acted careless then.”

He let out a sigh. “You don’t-”

“Actually, I do.” She cut his sentence short. “It’s my fault that you can’t support your team. I’ve felt bad for doing that ever since it happened, and I apologize for making you like this. And I know that I can’t make it heal any faster, but I would like to help you with cleaning and finishing your paperwork until it heals properly.” She looked over at him. “Please? I know that you’re still mad at me for doing that, but at least I'm trying to make it up to you.”

He kept his eyes forward, and saw that they had stopped by her horse. He slowly outstretched his arm towards him, and while petting it, Levi said, “I don’t want to put all of that work on your shoulders, Ackerman. I’m capable of getting shit done on my own.”

There was a small pause before Levi continued. “But since you feel so bad, I’ll allow you to help me out.” He met her eyes once more. “And there’s no reason for you to apologize. You did what you thought was right, and I can’t punish you for doing that.”

She nodded to him, then have him a small smile. “Thank you, Heichou.”

He nodded to her, then looked out at the field. Now was the time to start heading back to headquarters before it got dark. He called for his horse, and waited for a minute to see if he would show up, but he didn’t. 

He attempted to call for his horse again, but no avail. He let out an irritated sigh. He tried again. Maybe the third time worked?


Nope. His horse was nowhere to be found.

Mikasa started to pet her horse as well. “We can just take my horse back. I’m sure that your horse managed to survive. After all, you're his owner, so he must’ve found a way to survive unlike most of the horses.”

He raised an eyebrow, but he didn’t question it. He carefully hopped onto her noble steed, then said, “I’ll take us back. Just hop on.” After all of this, he was ready to go back to his office and enjoy a nice cup of tea. Maybe I’ll ask Mikasa to make it for me.

She hopped on soon after he told her to. She wasn’t sure if she could wrap her arms around his waist to make sure she doesn’t fall, but she slowly did, trying her best not to startle him. The ravenette did feel his body tense up, but he quickly relaxed.

“Hold on tight,” he told her as he took hold of the reins and whip them in a manner to get the horse to start moving.

She did as she was told and held onto Levi’s waist tightly. She was sure that this was unsafe, but they had no other choice. The Survey Corps was long gone, and there wasn’t any other people just standing around with an extra horse.


They made it back to headquarters before the sun went down, and she had offered to help Levi get to his office, but he denied it, and went by himself.

He slowly made his way inside, and tried his best to mask his pain as he walked. Then he remembered that Erwin was in his office, and his office was past his, and he mentally cursed. He put his hood up on his cloak and tried to sneak past the Commander’s office, but as soon as he was close to getting to his office, he heard Erwin’s door open. 

The raven-haired male was going to make a run for it, but he knew that was going to be challenging for him, so he decided to slowly walk towards his office, hoping that the blond haired male wouldn’t notice that it was him.

“Levi, take the hood off.”

Shit. There was no use in trying to run, so he slowly pulled down the hood and turned towards Erwin. “Look, Erwin, I-”

“You disobeyed my orders, Levi.” He said to the shorter male as he crossed his arms over his chest. “And you risked putting not only yourself, but Mikasa in danger as well.”

He looked away from Erwin. Yeah, he did risk putting himself in danger, but he did help them out, so why was he scolding him? Honestly, Levi wasn’t in the mood to argue with him, so he kept silent.

Then, he saw Mikasa coming up to the both of him, and he let out a breath that he didn’t know that he was holding in. He saw her salute to them, and Erwin said, “At ease, Ackerman. Now, do you mind telling me why the two of you made it back here so late?”

“There was still a few titans out, Sir, so Heichou took them down before we left. But we found out that he lost his horse, so we had no other choice but to take my horse back here.” She glanced over at Levi, then continued. “As he went inside though, I put away my horse, and I found Heichou’s horse in the stable.”

He looked over at Erwin. “But I thought-”

“One of the other cadets pointed him out, so I ordered him to take him back to headquarters with us. I hope that wasn’t a problem for you.” He said with a smirk. That’s his form of punishment? 

He wanted to punch this man right now, but if he did that, he might’ve been in more trouble than what he already was in, so he decided to walk off, and head towards his office. He heard Mikasa follow behind, and he was about to yell at her, but his anger shouldn’t be taken out on his cadet.

“Heichou, are you alright?” She asked softly as they made it to his office. He leaned against the door, then looked over at her.

He opened the door, and went inside of his office. He let out a sigh, the responded with, “I’m really not. We could’ve died out there.” He took off his cloak before sitting on his desk. “I’m not underestimating our abilities, but what if something happened out there? It’s not like a miracle could’ve happened and we survived the whole ordeal.”

She walked in, then closed the door behind her. She walked towards him, then stopped as she got towards the middle of the room. “You had nothing to worry about, Heichou. I’m glad that you’re worried about our safety, but I’m sure that we could’ve handled anything that came our way.”

“Yeah, we could have.” He said lowly. “But I didn’t want to risk that, and yet, he did. Now that was an awful form of punishment for someone who wanted to help their team out.”

“Well…you did disobey his orders.” That earned a glare from Levi, but she didn’t care. “And you could’ve risked fracturing your ankle, and that would’ve been worse, because you would have been bedridden for more than a month.”

He rolled his eyes. “I didn’t invite you in here to get a damn lecture. I invited you in here so that you could help me out as I’m trying to recover.”

“I will, don’t worry. I’m just saying that I don’t want for you to hurt yourself for me anymore, alright Heichou?” Her voice sounded innocent, as if she was trying to get him to calm down.

Levi met her gaze. He actually respected that she was trying to repay him, even though he didn’t want her to. “Whatever. And since you’re here, can you…get me some tea? It might help me calm down. And after that, you can settle in for the night. I won’t need you until morning.”

She nodded, then saluted to him. “Thank you for everything, Heichou.” And with that, she went out the room to make Levi’s tea for him.

He let out a sigh as soon as she left. Maybe I could get used to this.


Sorry if there are any spelling errors! I hope you all enjoyed it! ;^; ♡

  • Me: ok I really need to focus on this test
  • ME: Ya know what how about you go ahead and fail me!

anonymous asked:

If you're still taking prompts, maybe #31, phlint? :D love your writing, as always!

31. “I can’t keep kissing strangers and pretending that they’re you.”

(This is loosely based in a Soulmate AU where their name appears on your skin around puberty and then people join the online registry which finds your match and puts you in contact with your soulmate.)

“I can’t keep kissing strangers and pretending that they’re you, Clint!”

“Why–what? Why the hell are you going around kissing a bunch of strangers to begin with!?”

“Because I can’t kiss you!”

“Okay, I know I’m generally pretty slow on the uptake, but that–there doesn’t sound like there’s any logic involved right there. I mean, if there is, okay. Sure. Just, gonna need you to explain that one to me.”

“Clint, you’re my soulmate. I know we aren’t really in a relationship or anything yet, but I still love you, and I’ve never even seen you, for fuck’s sake!”

“I told you I wasn’t ready to meet yet. You said–you’re the one who said that was okay! That you didn’t mind waiting. So don’t try and put this on me, or whatever–”

“I know, Clint. I know. And I meant it. I will wait for you, however long it takes, I’ll keep waiting my whole life, even if we never meet. Just–look, would it be okay if, maybe, do you think you could send me a picture? It doesn’t even have to be a good one, just…something. So I know.”

“Know what? That all your stupid declarations fall apart when you see what a sad sack of shit the universe paired you with?”

“You’re not–please don’t talk about yourself like that, Clint. You’re wonderful.”

“So you need some picture to narrow down whatever fucked up criteria you’ve been using to pick out strangers to make out with?”

“Clint! For all I know, any one of them could’ve been you because I don’t have any clue what you look like!”

“Well maybe I don’t want you to know!”

“Okay. Okay, Clint. That’s–I don’t understand, necessarily, but I promised I’d wait ‘til you were ready. On all accounts. I may be a little frustrated right now, but nothing’s changed in that regard.”

“Good. Cool.”

“Yeah. Cool.”

“Hey, Phil?”

“Yes, Clint?”

“No more kissing strangers, okay?”


“Or, like, not-strangers.”


“Or, well, you know. No more kissing anybody that’s not me.”


“Your kisses are mine. I get exclusive rights from here on out. Soulmate privilege, or whatever.”

“Sure thing, Clint. From here on out, I’m saving up all my kisses for you.”

“’Cause you love me?”

“Warts and all.”

“Aw, Phil! I don’t have warts!”

“So you say.”

“Whatever. You’d totally love all my warts anyway.”

“I totally would.”

“Ugh. How’d I get stuck with such a sap of a soulmate, anyway?”

“You’re just lucky I guess.”

“Yeah. The luckiest.”

anonymous asked:

[Drums steepled fingers together like some sort of villain.] Reyes totally holds those "grade checks" once a month to fluster the fuck out of you and get to know you. One night when you're out with friends at some bar or club you both see each other and just "oh shit he's even hotter outside of the classroom". [Shrugs] I'm not saying there's banging, because that's not a-okay for professor and student, but when you graduate? Totally asks you out appropriately (probably in Spanish). [Finger guns]

adorable-as-fuck said to luvleekaotix-imagines:

You. Are. Going. To be. The. Death. Of. Me. And I fucking love it. I am fucking trash for this sort of thing and the fact that you’re doing the lords work is amazing. However, I need more of that wonderful Teacher Hanzo…or even…how would McCree fit in this glorious uni setting? Please. I need it like air. <3

I AMMMMMMMMMMMM STUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK IN REYES HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL GET MEEEEEEEE THE FUCKKKKKKKK OUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT. Okay okay okay, take a deep fucking breath everyone. Like fucking breathe please. Hold onto yer fuckin’ horses cause meeting Professor Reyes like after hours when you and your girls are out clubbing? MMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm let me combine particular parts of the asks above.

Overwatch AU intro here. A little extra on Reyes here


Keep reading

Rules to KS

Disclaimer: Don’t kill the messenger (that’s all I am in this post) , these are just what I took from the complaints,disagreements, and other comments here and there that i’ve seen in the tags and in post comments..to some extent I have exaggerated them..to some extent. This post is not any of my beliefs and was used with sarcastic language .if you don’t speak it and wanna argue then don’t come over here friend :) #readingisfundamental.. If you planned on being curious in the tags or wanted to join the fandom then I hope this post finds you first before the real discourse lol

Rule 1). Don’t like KS. Fuck is wrong with you? Fuck the author (make sure to note that Koogi needs to be called out for this mess of a story) and fuck you. period.point blank. end of discussion. For if ye do, thy must commit thyself to the finest casket made of sheep wool to lie dead in, for eternity (In simple english: Go die, perish, poof bam be gone)

Rule 2). Don’t discuss the differences between reality and fiction. That’s such a shit excuse like don’t you fucking dare! Because we all know that after reading this shit manhwa you’ll become like sangwoo (picks up phone to dial police cause they need to arrest y’all asses ASAP)

Rule 10.5). Whatever do you mean about there being an anti ks and discourse tag? It is a must and one’s duty to continue to repeat and discuss their dislike for KS and the fandom in the actual killing stalking tag. You know. gotta make motherfuckas aware of how they are damaging society and ruining lives. #doingGodswork

Rule 20). You must acknowledge that the KS tumblr fandom is fucking sick, a sick fucking joke (completely ignores the instagram fandom and the lack of chill they have lol)

Rule 30.5). EVERYONE and I do mean EVERYONE that is dumb enough to be in this fandom (and still ignored rule #1) are just a bunch of straight cis female women girls.

Rule 41). Being as it may that you have ignored rule number 1, then at least acknowledge that Yoonbum is our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Please don’t come over here talking about his so called “past choices”…stalker my ass, he is soo pure xoxoxo and that beast Sangwoo ughh. Did you guys see in Chapter 1 when Sangwoo grabbed Bum off the streets of Seoul into his nasty ass home like the nasty motherfucker he is?!…he’s been stalking bum…wow free the fuck outta him

Rule 2001). Speaking of this Sangdoodoo, being that some of y’all have ignored rule # 41, let me just let you know how fucking gross it is to actually like this man, some of y’all with your excuses like “ he’s just such a well written character that’s why i like him” you’re a liar. Then you got the other ones who try to make it seem like they just like him for his physical aspects..umm you’re a fucking liar too. Sangwoo is only “loved” because of how violent he is towards Bum, you guys fucking get off to him abusing Bum plz stop lying

Rule 2000). Please note that Sangwoo is a boring villian trope. There are better villains than him, like dora the explorer edward cullen, elmo, winnie the poo, that 50 shades of character MC..yeah

Rule 20.02). Yoonbum was never thirsty for any kind of dick. Sangwoo been ready to put out, you remember in chapter 1 when Sangwoo said that he wondered what Yoonbum’s sex was like as he stared at him in the classroom? yeah…exactly so stfu

Rule 1992). Bum’s Uncle > Sangwoo because at least his uncle didn’t sexually assault him (Messenger note : I have actually seen someone comment that bum’s uncle is greater than sangwoo..I am not exaggerating)

Rule 1980s). Don’t imply that Sangwoo is to be any kind of daddy, dad as fuck, pappy, papa, tu papa, or la casa. It gives off the vibe that you too want your legs broken and that you think him as your biological father, it will not be seen as a joke so just stop

Rule 1999). Stop saying that you wanna see Sangwoo lose his shit. What you should be saying is how bad you wanna throw him in the trash can set him a flame, bring him back to life, chop him up, put him back together, let Bum kick him with his light up sneakers and then toss him into Korea’s seas :)

Rule 2003). Respect and love Officer Seungbae. (Messenger note: This is the easiest rule to follow if ignored rule #1 of course)

Rule 3005). IF YOU HAVE IGNORED EVERY ONE OF THESE RULES (maybe except rule # 2003..if you don’t like him then “oh shit yo”) THEN THERE IS REASON AS TO WHY YOU HAVE BEEN SEEN AS THE LOWEST OF THE LOW BECAUSE THERE IS A HIGH PROBABILITY THAT YOU SHIP THE FORSAKEN NAME THAT ONE MUST NOT SPEAK OF. You have lost your ultimate mind. Sangwoo> said ship. you really fucked up now. Anti KS will curse your name and family and Anti “cursed ship’s name” will abandon you. I hope you have your casket prepared.

Thank you.

as promised: the fetishism callout post!

let me just begin by saying there's nothing wrong with finding any of the cast members attractive. this is an EXTREMELY attractive cast. everyone is so FINE I bet even the folks backstage who we don't see are gorgeous. Its okay to be sexually attracted to them too! We've all made posts professing our love to the cast, which is perfectly fine!! Right now you're looking at Leslie Odom Jr's fiancé! we good!!

but ya see there's a big difference between "anthony ramos is my sweet freckled child <333" and "I want anthony to shove his #thicc cock inside of me and ten other cast members at the same time but also freckles uwu"

You see the difference right?? Right??????

I don't have anything against writing smut about the characters (who, yes, are technically real people but they've been dead for literal centuries ok. Let it go) but it just gets weird REEAAAAL fast when u say the same thing about musical!John Laurens and the real live human being Anthony Ramos. It gets even weirder when u talk about the cast members in this way in relations to each other??? Shipping real people in a serious, unironic way is just a lil :/// to me (I say "serious, unironic way" bc I do write rpf with my friend but its a Huge Joke™ and nonsexual and come on I don't actually ship sandra bullock and steve harvey together ok). I mean Anthony is quite frankly dating Jasmine Cephas Jones.....it's a legitimate fact. There are pictures. It's on Wikipedia. They're in LOVE and its PRECIOUS and they're gonna get MARRIED eventually so why tf r yall writing about him bottoming for Lin????????

And Lin!!! He has a beautiful WIFE AND SON. You can speculate about his sexuality, NOT PUBLICLY BC HE SEES THINGS, but that's fine if u honestly must??? (although he tweeted that he was straight once during his "grease live" livetweeting so......like......). U can talk about how cute he and jonathan groff are! But y'all don't stop there do u? Bc one second ur talkin about them being cute and then a sentence later it's all "and then he SUCKED his BIG FAT DICK clean off!!!!!! He was dickless!!!! While wearing their costumes!!!!!!!!!! He choked on the full decapitated dick!!!!!"

That shit ain't cute.

So, now that u finally realize that (hopefully), we can get to the real nitty mcfreaking gritty. this part is primarily for white fans but it technically applies to anyone who is not specifically latinx and/or black jsyk:

So even before the whole "baby girl" thing started, I saw quite a few of y'all calling Anthony and Lin "papi" which like.....why should I even have to tell you why this is wrong. If you're not latinx, DON'T USE THE WORD "PAPI", especially since most of y'all are using it in a sexual context. You went ahead and took an innocent word, and turned it into a way to sexualize your faves who just so happen to be latinx. It just ain't right, and its also?? weird??? Let me put it this way, I'm black but not jewish so thatd be like me calling daveed "bubbe". Or something. Either way see how that'd be gross and offensive? You're taking a part of them, a huge part of them, their culture, and turning it into something exotic and sexual. That, my friends, is fetishism.

Another good example of this is the whole "baby girl/boy" n "papa" thing. Y'all rly went ahead and took an cute nickname and rolled RIGHT with it lmao. @alexandralexander explained it beautifully in this post, but basically "papa" (and "mama") is a cute lil way of older folks to regard ppl who are younger than them. It's a caribbean thing, aka something yall just won't get. Idk what the whiter equivalent would be, idk like ur grandad calling u "big guy" or something??? Who knows. Just kno that its NOT SEXUAL IN ANYWAY LIKE WTF WHY DID Y'ALL MAKE THAT A DADDY KINK THING. WHY CAN NOTHING BE SACRED WITH YOU GUYS. Best believe when my grandparents call my brother "papa" they mean it in an endearing way. And that's how Lin meant it? I don't see how it could have been construed any other way??

As for the baby girl/boy thing, in all the times I've been called/heard someone else call someone baby girl, it was NOT sexual. It can be used that way, but it was n o t in this context. Again, its a cultural thing i guess. And with "baby boy", yall do remember that anthony plays lin's son in this show right. okay, just checking.

But forreal. what is wrong wit u guys. I told myself I wasn't gonna kinkshame nobody but its Time, it rly and truly is Time.

One last point I want to make (as if this isn't long enough already) is the language with which u talk about the cast too. This was said rly well in several posts especially this one that uses that tags ppl tend to use, but i’m gonna elaborate on it a little. I just want to know right now why Anthony (or our lighter skinned and SURE AS HELL THE WHITE cast members) is "sweet precious sunflower child cinnamon biscuit roll wheatgrass turkish delight with sprinkles or some other corny shit <333" while daveed is AUTOMATICALLY "raw me zaddy" THE FUCK??? Why we gotta go STRAAIGGHTT to zaddy-basis with daveed??? Why do I see y'all talking about his dick size???? Y'all dont do that from the get-go for the lighter skinned members (which is sad bc daveed is already a certified Lightskint™ so that's rly saying something)?? Why can't black actors (and characters) ever be seen as "sweet turnip bumblebees (???)" instead of either being put on an inhuman pedestal where it's "STEP ON ME BAD BITCH QUEEN" or sexualized with some "CHOKE ME YOU COCKSLUT" ???? Ask yourselves why y'all do that. I'll wait. 
And y'all don't even TALK about oak (as a quick sidenote okieriete is not that hard of a name to pronounce y'all just don't care to try. It sounds exactly like its spelled) but tbh I don't rly want u to bc you'd just sexualize him as well. Plus that means more for me cause I'm engaged to him too :) remember to save the date!!
This was all over the place and idk if I even said what I was trying to say but whatever. I guess what I'm trying to say is (and this is to white fans) you're stanning a thing full of people of color. im assuming that this is probably the first thing that youve been rly into that has included exclusively people of color. Please just be mindful of the way you talk about them. There's a history of you exotifying and sexualizing poc to the point that historically, people have been killed for??? There's a history behind y'all calling latinx folks "papi" and automatically assuming black folks got a big dick ok lmao. At the end of the day, the way you talk about them shows that you don't rly respect them as much as you claim to do??? Idk I wish I had made notes about this bc it sounded waaaaaaayyy better in my head but! Whatever it's still lit. s/o to @aaronsburrr for assistance! 

anonymous asked:

Do you know any good smutty/sexy fics? Ones that are just that?

I’m assuming you mean just simple one shots with little plot so you could check out these:

Auror Training-  Auror training is not quite what she expected. [AU Lily/James, Smut]

Fireside-  Trying to reassure Lily Evans that the world isn’t going to fall apart on his watch, James ends up revealing far more than he’d intended - and the emotions that have been bottled up for years are finally realised.

Hijacking- James and Lily start hijacking one another’s rounds in order to sneak off to entirely inappropriate Hogwarts locales. LJSmut. Lemon.

It Happened In A Broom Cupboard-  James Potter was not happy, and it was all Lily Evans’s fault. L/J. One-shot, smut.

Lol I’m sorry these are all Jily I’m Jily trash You should check out my fanfic recs page though if you want something that is longer and still pretty smutty cause I have some of that on there. Also, if you’re a slut for Jily like I am check out @jilyarchive they’re my favorite place to go in search of new Jily fanfic


So, over time I’ve liked/saved a crap ton of lists people have made up of AU scenarios. I wanted to combine them into a giant post of all of them so people can use them for fanfics or whatever. Note: IF ANY OF THESE AUS ARE YOURS AND YOU’D LIKE THEM REMOVED FROM THIS LIST, PLEASE LET ME KNOW AND I’LL DO IT. I’M NOT TRYING TO STEAL NOTES I JUST WANTED ALL THESE GREAT IDEAS IN ONE PLACE. So, here we go…


  • i fell asleep on your shoulder and you were too polite to move or wake me up au
  • we have the same luggage and didn’t check the tags before we left so i’m calling you to exchange suitcases (and you also had some interesting things in your bag so i’m excited to meet you) au
  • author of book gets seated next to someone reading their book and making entertaining faces at each scene au
  • bonding solely via eye contact over that annoying person on our plane that we’re both slowly becoming more and more exasperated about au
  • you fell asleep and i started making funny faces at your kid to keep them amused and the steward mistook us for a couple au
  • actually, any mistaken for a couple au
  • i’m afraid of flying and you were incredibly helpful and tolerant and sweet about it au
  • i made a horrible first impression at the gate or in line for airport food but now we’re sitting next to each other au


  • both of our children are sick in the hospital and we meet nightly at the coffee machine au 
  • spies that have to be fake married on a fake honeymoon on an undercover operation in the tropics au
  • i’m in love with your crafts in your etsy shop and i’m also in love with you au
  • college au where my roommate brings me home to their thanksgiving and my roommate’s sister has brought her friend home as well and oh no you’re hot au
  • drunk strangers arrested for having sex outside of the bar and are stuck doing community service together au
  • a photojournalist and a red cross worker in a conflict zone au


  • being reunited after surviving the zombie apocalypse unknowing if the other was alive or dead AU
  • rescuing their partner from a recon mission gone wrong AU
  • drama school rivals being cast as romantic opposites because they have “crazy sexual tension” according to their director AU
  • “are we both robbing the same house oh fuck” AU
  • growing up together in a rough neighbourhood AU
  • mutual friends always dragged to the same inane barbecues AU


  • ‘we both got kicked out of our rooms because our roommates are having sex so now we’re standing in the hallway avoiding each other’ AU
  • 'I heard you singing backstreet boys at 3am and decided to sing along oops’ AU
  • ’ holy shit i’m in the wrong car’ AU
  • ‘Omg I can’t believe you still listen to CDs let me help you digitize’ AU
  • ’ I know you steal my wifi to watch porn but it’s kinda hot idk’ AU
  • 'My pet really hates your pet’ AU
  • ’ Customer that knows wayyyy more than the brand new employee please help me out’ AU
  • 'I was walking by the roller coasters and SOMEONE’S SHOE FLEW OFF AND HIT ME IN THE HEAD” AU
  • 'dude i know we don’t know each other but my swim trunks came off when i jumped in the water can you grab them for me’ AU
  • ”it’s 2am and i’m drunk and i need some goddamn french fries right now so open your fucking door’ AU
  • 'got mistaken for a celebrity by the celebrity’s biggest fan’ AU
  • 'this person just fell asleep on me in the subway but they’re cute so whatever’ AU
  • 'sorry i set the fire alarm in our building off again for the forty-eighth time i was trying to cook’ AU
  • 'so YOU’RE the douchebag who keeps mowing their lawn while i’m trying to sleep’ AU
  • 'I know nothing about camping will you help me i think i heard a bear’ au
  • 'we’re literally the only two kids who ride this school bus maybe we should carpool or make out or something’ AU
  • 'I hired you off craigslist to be my date for a wedding’ AU
  • ’I’m a werewolf but I’m embarrassed to tell you because my wolf form is more like a chihuahua’ AU
  • 'we both tried to rob a bank at the same time’ AU


  • I’m really passionate about this cause and I will give you this flier if I have to shove it down your throat
  • vicious battle over the only left handed desk in the room
  • my roommate’s boyfriend is staying over so can I please sleep on your floor
  • it’s pouring and my final paper is in my backpack so I guess we’re stuck under this tiny awning together. do you think they’d deliver pizza here
  • hey I have to photograph someone for class will you be my model
  • hey I have to take someone’s blood pressure for class will you be my victim
  • variations of the above
  • I know I keep coming to the cookie shop and for some reason it’s always your shift but don’t you dare judge me I need these for my sanity
  • all our friends are drunk
  • it’s 3 am and I’m still in the library studying for finals and I’m losing my grip on reality and I think I just saw a ghost
  • we’re the only two people in this club. what is this club even for
  • humans vs zombies (see you can still have your zombie AU, best of both worlds)
  • we’re the only people who ever talk in discussions it’s awful


  • Neither of us bought the expensive textbook but there is only one copy in the library and it can’t leave the building
  • This awesome professor only has one TA slot and we’re rivals
  • I found your USB drive still in the computer
  • I thought I was the only one who liked the waffle station in the cafeteria
  • You keep reserving the good study room in the corner of the library with the windows
  • We’re studying in the library and there are two people very obviously fucking in the stacks and we keep sharing embarrassed glances
  • We’re both donating blood in the blood donation van in the quad to get out of the same class
  • You decked me in the head while you were playing frisbee golf
  • Wait, I actually have a competent lab partner?
  • You’re the RA and you’re trying to bust me for having hermit crabs
  • You’re baking cookies in the communal kitchen at 3am and I’m angry but also really hungry
  • What are you doing at this table at the career fair
  • Waiting for office hours
  • I’ve been sitting in this seat all semester why did you decide to sit in it today
  • Clearly we’re both really uncomfortable at this party
  • You peed on my car. You were drunk. I was in the car. There will be hell to pay.
  • We started racing up the three flights of stairs to class for some reason and we can’t stop
  • You’re REALLY GOOD at using the right search terms for the academic databases and I’m on a deadline


  • my friend dragged me to this party and I just saw my ex quick make out with me
  • we’re always at the fitness center at the same time and end up competing on the treadmill
  • Sorry my roommate puked on your shoes
  • Can I borrow a dryer sheet? I ran out and the ones in the vending machine give me a rash
  • Your school mailbox is right next to mine
  • I saw you sneaking captain crunch and cutlery out of the dining hall
  • My roommate borrowed your contraband hotpot and managed to set it on fire
  • You keep using my preferred shower stall in the floor bathrooms when I’m trying to get ready for class
  • My computer crashed and you’re the student worker at the IT center
  • we’re both on althetic teams that aren’t as cool as the football team and they give us shit
  • You’re part of the guerrilla theater club on campus and crashed my class for a performance
  • What do you mean we’re under a tornado warning?


  • street performers AU
  • got a crush on the hairdresser and now my hair is slowly getting really short AU
  • we’ve been dating for three months and you’re only now telling me you’re a werewolf AU
  • ended up adopting like three dogs because that pet shelter employee is really hot AU
  • accidentally called a sex line AU
  • we reached for the last box of chicken nuggets in the supermarket at the same time and there’s no way I’m letting you have it asshole AU
  • met at a con where we accidentally cosplayed the fandom otp PLOT TWIST it’s our notp but god damn I wouldn’t mind making out with you AU
  • wore the same obscure fandom shirt in public AU
  • I was singing in public and you decided to join in and now we’re singing a dramatic duet together also what’s your number AU


  • 'i got caught staring at my adult neighbour raking up a bunch of leaves in their backyard and jumping into them and now have to awkwardly pretend i saw nothing’ au
  • met at a pumpkin patch fighting over the same perfectly round and picturesque pumpkin au
  • 'me and my roommate decided to decorate our house for halloween but got really into it, and ended up re-enacting several scenes from nightmare on elm street so loud the neighbours called the police to investigate screams’ au
  • 'i ordered a pumpkin spice latte at starbucks and you made a heart with the foam and i decided to drink it here so i can smile at you some more’ au
  • 'this stranger on the street corner looks like they’re severely unprepared for this cold weather, here, take my scarf, i was planning on donating it to goodwill anyways’ au
  • 'i was unaware that there was an organized zombie crawl going on and i didn’t realize you were in a costume and i screamed in your face because i truly thought i was facing a zombie invasion’ au


  • met at a charity kissing booth au
  • sex shop employee and slightly flustered customer au
  • highschool party au with spin the bottle
  • neighbours au where person A goes over to person B to tell B to ‘stop singing karaoke it’s 2am’
  • met in a line for a roller-coaster au (bonus: one of them is scared shitless)
  • 'you were the only one at the party who understood my movie reference’ au
  • lifeguard/swimmer or lifeguards au


  • incredibly long crosscountry train ride AU
  • police procedural AU
  • bookstore AU
  • reluctant teammates that save the world together AU
  • platonic living together AU
  • lawyers AU
  • stuck-in-an-airport-because-the-flights-were-SO-VERY-delayed-and-it’s-like-two-am AU
  • sent to live with cousins AU
  • pretending to be siblings because of reasons AU
  • teaming up to rescue respective abducted children AU
  • pseudo-adopting-the-runaway-i-ran-into AU
  • forget high school students AU i want a high school teachers AU
  • law school AU
  • on the same college tour AU
  • trapped in a bank during a robbery AU
  • forced to share a table at the coffee shop a couple days in a row because crowded coffee shop and no room AU
  • medical school AU
  • ride the same bus together literally every day AU
  • vet clinic AU
  • 'i’m pretending to be ur bff bc u looked VERY uncomfortable with that person at the bar hitting on u’ AU
  • college professors AU
  • on a train together and the train is stopped in the middle of nowhere for some reason AU


  • 'oh my god im so sorry my dog usually doesnt jump up on people like this i have no idea what their deal is but also hey there’
  • met while jumping into the same pile of freshly raked leaves in a park (alternatively, one jumps in and they met when no 2 kicks said pile of leaves)
  • waiting behind you in line but ‘excuse you me did i just hear you talking shit about my favourite superhero there SON’
  • 3am and the fire alarm in our apartment complex just went off let me lend you my jacket while we wait on the sidewalk
  • it started as one game of ddr in a games acarde/convention and turned into a two hour long battle and i wont let you wiN
  • 'it was raining so hard i wasnt paying attention as i ran into the side of your car/you/your umbrella but were both drenched now and also hey there’
  • eating in the same diner every morning and the waitress ALWAYS mixes up our orders so why dont we just sit at the same table to save her the trouble
  • well were both here to meet a mutual friend to hang out but they dropped out last second and this is awkward as shit huh
  • 'im sorry but your headphones are so loud i can hear them from here and just what the crap do you think youre listening to thats so two thousand and late’
  • 'wait, have we met before?’ 'no, i think i wouldve remembered’ just in any context just do it okay
  • ghost hunters/haunted house/paranormal investigators au


  • met doing laundry at 2am college au 
  • accidentally knocked on the wrong dorm room college au
  • picked up the wrong book when we bumped into each other college au
  • hey exchange student why don’t you can come to mine for thanksgiving?? college au
  • did i mention college au
  • walked in on you in the shower college au
  • drunkenly hooked up but you’re dating my roommate who already hates me college au
  • the always-partying kid falls for the always-studying kid college au
  • heard a scream and thought you were getting killed but it was just a spider college au
  • i really hate you but you have the highest grades in class and i need help college au


  • You’re a rebel by accident cause you get really animated when you talk and hit people in the face leading to fights. Now you just roll with it. I know the truth though.
  • Totally saw you spray paint the principals car and you’ll have to buy me dinner to keep me quiet.
  • I pretty much live in detention and you’re a straight A student here on your first offense. Wanna add another and skip detention with me?
  • Every time I get in a fight you patch me up but now I’m the one patching you up after your tripped on thin air.
  • I’m a super tough punk who hates authority. Your parents are cops who have met me more than once but I like you a lot.
  • Me and my buddies vandalized your backyard trampling your mini garden in the process. Now I feel really shitty cause you’re really upset about this. Look I’ll help fix it okay just stop with the sad faces.
  • Accidentally knocked you out when you got caught in the middle of a fist fight between me and this other kid during school. So I sat with you in the nurses office. Shut up! Punks like me have consciouses to you know!
  • You’re always picking fights and I’m the one who has to use my charm and way with words to stop them from getting out of hand.
  • You’re a police officer and I’m constantly in and out of holding/jail and we get to know each other well so sometimes you give me my favorite treats when no ones looking.
  • I’m always fighting and getting in trouble at school so people avoid me. You frequent the small ice cream shop my parents own and know how kind I am to children and elderly people but I don’t realize this.
  • You give me a piggy back ride (or ride home) after I got out of a brutal fight and can barely stand.
  • I brought my new kitten to school hold her please while I kick this guys ass.
  • Punks can get scared of thunder storms too


  • 'I totally wasn’t breaking into your apartment I locked myself out of mine and I’m directly above yours so I picked your lock and was gonna use the fire escape and climb in through my window’ AU
  • 'You’re new to the building so I have to tell you that I’m a registered sex offender but I was eighteen and they were seventeen and it was a really big misunderstanding please let me explain’ AU
  • 'Every night I go down to the lobby vending machines I smell the best cooking ever coming from your apartment and it’s 12 pm but I’m really hungry and the vending machines aren’t cutting it for me’ AU
  • 'You were dragged into my video game competition and I was beat for the first time in years I have to stalk you and beg you to play me until I can beat you’ AU
  • 'My next door neighbor asking my to check up on their apartment while the away and feed their animals I broke a vase and your my other neighbor please help me’ AU
  • 'I can’t pass stray animals so once a week you see me going into my apartment with a different animal before I find them a home and you decide you want one’ AU
  • 'Everyday I hear you curse at your computer next door lucky I can help you so I barge in and decide to put and end to this but I also see all the porn you watch’ AU
  • 'You see me coming out of my apartment dressed as the opposite gender for a party and get confused the next day when I’m not dressed up and still attractive’ AU


  • We both attend a boarding school and we aren’t supposed to be out this late. I thought I heard a teacher. Quick hide in this small space with me!
  • I tried to sneak out using my window and now I’m hanging from it can you help me?
  • I was skipping class to sleep in an empty class room and you caught me but the door closed behind you and now we’re trapped inside cause the inside lock is broken.
  • Teacher left us alone in detention wanna make out??
  • I may have brought my pet to school by accident and it may have escaped you have to help me.
  • You just caught me stealing my phone back from the teachers desk and it turns out you were here to steal the lesson plans. Wow you’re a thief….
  • I just accidentally kicked a rock too hard and it broke that window and you saw it happen
  • I run a (technically illegal) snack shop in school and you’re the student council president who caught me
  • You accidentally broke the clay figure the boss keeps on their desk and some how I’m helping you fix it???
  • I accidentally stumbled upon your makeshift hideout on school grounds let me nap here and I won’t say a word.
  • I may or may not be the one who set off those fireworks but on the off chance that I was what would I have to do to get out of trouble???
  • You know that I’m the one who set the teachers ringtone to boys moaning and called them during class now you’re using this against me.
  • Someone has been leaving post it notes with hyper realistic dicks drawn on them around the school and as Student Council President I have to find out who it is


  • “I broke your nose at a mosh pit” AU
  • “I hit you with my car and was the only one to visit you in the hospital” AU
  • “You were chased by the cops, got in my car and just yelled ‘Drive!’” AU
  • “You punched me in the face while gesticulating wildly to a friend” AU
  • “You laughed in a restaurant but you have an ugly laugh and I thought you were choking, so I spent the last three minutes awkwardly humping you while performing the Heimlich maneuver” AU
  • “We met each other on a Sunday morning, both doing our walk of shame” AU
  • “I get really sick on roller-coasters and you had the misfortune of sitting in front of me so, uh… sorry…” AU
  • “You’re the bastard who keeps parking right in front of my house so I retaliated by keying your car and you caught me” AU
  • “I work at a department store and if you take out and unfold a shirt and then leave it one more time I’m going to stuff it down your throat” AU
  • “You broke into my apartment drunk thinking it was your friend’s house and I should call the cops but my cat kinda likes you so we’re good” AU
  • “My new dealer has friended me on Facebook and I’m unsure of how to react to that” AU
  • “You saw me reading the same book you did and we got into a heated discussion on how much it sucks” AU
  • “This is a five-hour-long plane ride, we’re sitting together and you’re deathly afraid of flying” AU


  • “You’re a celebrity and I’m a paparazzo, sorry friend I have to take pictures of you to pay my rent next month” AU
  • “You’re a store clerk and oh shit I just spotted my ex please let me hide behind your desk-thing” AU
  • "I don’t know you but I need some place to stay for the night, my roommate’s getting some” AU
  • “I’m helping my niece’s girl scout troop sell cookies and hell no, fuck off soccer coach, we were here first” AU
  • "This has been a very bad week and you just grabbed the last box of my favorite comfort food at the supermarket” AU
  • “You’ve locked yourself outside of your apartment and there’s a storm rolling in and I pity you so I’ll let you into mine” AU
  • “We’re neighbors who don’t really talk but your cat might have gotten my cat pregnant?? We must raise this little kitty family together” AU
  • “A toddler broke your nose and I may or may not have snapped my thumb during a very intense game of Mario Kart and now we’re both sitting next to each other in the hospital waiting room” AU


  • we’re both third seventh wheels in our groups au
  • you’re an actor in a haunted house and i accidentally punched you in the face when you scared me au
  • i do stupid shit and you’re my doctor au
  • accidentally called your number while drunk asking for a ride and you actually came au
  • we both didn’t want to be at this party but look where we are au
  • our pets banged and now one of them is expecting guess i should know your name au
  • i live in your old house and i keep getting your mail au
  • we’re both stuck in this airport cause of a storm and i’m afraid of thunder au
  • you’re a reaper escorting me to the afterlife and the road there is surprisingly long au
  • you saved me from a fire au
  • i work at the lost and found and does this thing seriously belong to you au
  • we’re both lost in the woods au
  • meeting in a nude spa au
  • i’m a florist and you keep buying flowers from me and what do you mean it was my fault we didn’t get together earlier you were buying flowers i assumed you had a lover au
  • you’re an immortal who keeps making history and guess what my best subject is au
  • we’re on the debates team yet we can’t argue about something without yelling au
  • how the hell do i keep managing to get you as my cab driver au
  • you’re a brass player why do you live in an apartment building au
  • you’re my friend/doctor and you’re the one who tells me i’m terminal au


  • “we live in different countries and got paired up as pen pals for a project for school” au
  • “i crashed your family member’s wedding for the free food but hi there” au
  • “i’m a techie, you’re the lead actor in a show” au
  • “the person running the rollercoaster is really hot” au
  • “sorry that text was meant for someone else but hi there who are you” au
  • “we’re in a breakfast club style all day detention” au
  • “i don’t want to go alone to my ex’s wedding and our mutual friend said you’re free that night” au
  • “i signed up for a dating website to get my mom off my back” au
  • “we’re in the same rocky horror troupe” au
  • “hey asshole quit kicking the back of my seat it’s a 10 hour flight” au
  • “your dad is my least favorite teacher” au
  • “my significant other cheated on me with you, wanna team up to destroy them?” au
  • “i’ve been coming to this club for years but you’re the best performer i’ve ever seen” au
  • “i’m rich and i’m not supposed to talk to servants but the person that scrubs my floor is really cute” au
  • “i was hitchhiking and you picked me up and WHOOPS YOU’RE A -FAMOUS ROCKSTAR” au
  • “we met on a reality show” au
  • “my family owns the hotel your family is staying in” au
  • “someone tripped me in the hallway and you’re the only one that helped me up” au
  • “my parents kicked me out and you’re the only person that bothered to ask the crying, obviously lost kid with a suitcase if something was the matter” au
  • “you accidentally left your ID in a library book” au
  • “i had a one night stand the night before i started a college class and WHOOPS I ACCIDENTALLY BANGED THE PROFESSOR” au
  • “i’m on a school trip to another country and one of the locals is seriously hot” au
  • “i’ve never met you before but i went to a huge party at your house with my significant other - who then proceeded to dump me” au
  • “you’re the cutest waiter at my favorite restaurant” au
  • “we didn’t come to this anime convention together but we dressed up as characters that are a couple in the show and people keep assuming we’re together and asking us to pose for pictures so hi there what’s your name” au
  • “you rescued me from the creepy person that was hitting on me in the bar” au


  • I can’t tell whether this is a date because you asked to see a movie but I’m still not sure you’re queer, and I’m toeing the line because maybe you’re just trying to make friends
  • One of us thinks this is a date but the other thinks it’s an informal job interview
  • I decided to flip a coin about every decision in my life for a week and that’s how we ended up on a date
  • We’re both meant to be going on blind dates with other people but we sat down at the wrong table and got our hopes up
  • We took each other’s underwear from the laundromat by mistake
  • I got drunk and sent a sexy naked pic to my ex but I sent it to you instead by mistake
  • We had one really bad date and never spoke again and now our friends have set us up on a blind date
  • I’m calling to cancel our date because I’m actually in the ER right now, sorry. …I mean, sure, I guess you can come down here, but… okay…
  • We had sex at the office party but we’re both workaholics so we don’t normally date
  • We’re going on a blind date - but wait a moment, aren’t you that went down on me in a back alley behind a club year ago? … what do you mean “which one”?
  • You bought me at a charity auction and you’re probably a serial killer
  • You’re my waiter and I’m on a really crappy date with an asshole
  • Your appointment with a sexual therapist was right after mine and we got talking in the waiting room
  • We’re on a blind date, but wait a moment… aren’t you that guy who gave me a hand job at a Renaissance Faire a year ago?… what do you MEAN “WHICH ONE”?
  • We both picked the same power ballad at karaoke so we sang a duet
  • We’re both trying to take advantage of the unlimited appetizers deal on separate dates at TGI Fridays and I got the mozzarella sticks and I’m on my sixth plate and I want to die, can I PLEASE swap you for some of your wings?


  • 'so you’re the asshole that took my username’ AU
  • 'your URL is really similar to my friend’s and I accidentally messaged you’ AU
  • 'whoops that was supposed to be on anon’ AU
  • 'my self-esteem is shit right now and I noticed you just went through my entire face tag, tell me I’m pretty’ AU
  • 'you were like my first follower, why are you still here’ AU
  • 'I just recognized you from across the store and I don’t know what to do, my training didn’t prepare me for this’ AU
  • 'I think half of my anons are from the same person and I’m trying to track you down’ AU
  • 'we both ship the same obscure pairing, let’s get married right now but first let’s share headcanons’ AU
  • 'I was looking at my new followers and I think you were my crush that moved away in fourth grade’ AU

That’s all I’ve got for now. As I said, if any of these are yours, and you want them removed, just let me know.

anonymous asked:

So I've been seeing littleluxray's art of Deku being critically (fatally) injured in battle floating around (please go check out the art if you can it's gorgeous and heartbreaking). And I know that I love your headcanons, so if you're still doing them, how do you see Todo reacting if Deku is badly injured? You can do Deku as well, but we know that Deku is so expressive and worried for everyone, so I really just want t o see Deku suffering and Todo suffering and I'm a terrible person.


Oh goodness ok @littleluxray‘s one of my art inspirations (I hope you’re ok with me tagging you!) so I’m gonna get shy but YES GOD I’VE BEEN EATING UP EVERY ITERATION OF THE INJURED DEKU SERIES AND LET ME TELL YOU GOOD ANON…..

Just call me Jesus ‘cause I’m Tender & Mild with emotions about my poor kids getting injured.

Following Deku getting injured, my god. Shouto’s not one to panic, but I am. Don’t worry Anon, I’m terrible too I crave this shit

  • I don’t know what’s worse, Shouto seeing Deku getting the shit knocked out of him, or arriving too late and seeing the aftermath.
  • Because I’m also a shining beacon of Sin and Degradation, let’s say Shouto arrives too late.
  • Deku’s shuddering on the ground, blood pooling. He’s battered and bloodied and honestly, it looks like a murder scene. Ribs punctured, breaths barely there, eyes glazing.
  • The natural instinct is to panic, but Shouto won’t let himself. Of course he’d run to Deku’s side, but his hands have never trembled like this.
  • Thank god for littleluxray’s art of Shouto and Deku today my god I’m weak
  • Can you imagine? Shouto doing everything he can to keep Deku from writhing while he sears the wound closed. He’s been taught emergency first-aid but this – this is beyond his repair.
  • Somewhere in his head he knows that all he can do now is stop the bleeding and bring him to the hospital, or wherever’s closest that can help. Is he consciously thinking that? God no, his only instinct is that Deku, his first friend, the person closest to him, is dying right in front of him and this is all he can do.
  • The other thing I want to point out is that from Horikoshi’s author notes on costumes, Shouto’s second outfit’s belt capsules are compact first aid tools. (what a good kid, he’s practically a boyscout) So I’m sure he’s practiced at it, but has he ever had real medical combat experience? Certainly not.
  • Shouto’s probably worse for wear too by the time Deku passes out from pain and/or exhaustion. Used his cold hand for Deku to bite down on so he didn’t bite his tongue, half-covered in the blood that Deku’s already lost.
  • Shouto doesn’t remember getting to the hospital. Only that he’s now standing outside the intensive care unit, and can hear the heart rate monitor barely, just barely sounding.
  • It’s stepping away that he realizes. His legs tremble and he nearly passes out himself. One of the nurses catches him and escorts him to another room to be fixed up and let him rest.
  • It’s only later that he’s told that he was aiding Deku for hours. Searing the wound, stopping the bleeding, making sure Deku didn’t give – and then carrying him to the hospital. Shouto didn’t realize at all. It felt like seconds with how fast his heart was going, trying to keep the anxiety down his throat.
  • He doesn’t ask about Deku’s condition. He’s almost – almost – afraid to. All he needs to believe is the sound of that faintly beeping heart monitor.

anonymous asked:

Hi guys! Thanks for the amazing work you're doing :) I'm wondering if you have any fake relationship or arranged marriage fics? Stay awesome!

Hi there! Thank you for your ask and your compliments. So, fake or arranged relationship / marriage? You’re lucky that is one of our favorite subjects! If it’s non AU it’s always such a drama ‘cause Dean and Cas are being stupid and Sam is most of the time being hilarious, and if it’s AU… Well, let’s say, best drama is here in this tag. Among many other tags. Seriously, we’re not being that plausible anymore since we’ve too many “amazing”, “the best drama” and “my favorite” tags.

Anyway, get comfortable and start reading because these are awesome! Once again. Meanwhile I’m selling myself for some rich, good-looking manager or angel-bad-ass-boss or, well, for any kinda of Cas. Have fun! – Admin J

Title: Make Damn Sure

Author: SurlyCat

Rating: Explicit

Words: 124,823 – Ongoing

Admin’s assessment: ★ ★ ★ ★

Admin J’s notes: I need this one finished like right now. RIGHT NOW. Please! I love it so much and I go to check it like every day ‘cause I live in hope that the author will post an update sometime very soon. That kind of a manager is the reason why I’m in this field. I’m still expecting my own manager Castiel to appear into my life. So far it ain’t looking good, though…

Summary: Dean Winchester is not thrilled about taking an office job at one the most powerful media corporations in the country. His work has always been hands on, but when Charlie tells him about the job opening and its comfortable salary, the temptation is just too great to turn down. And really, it wouldn’t be too bad if it weren’t for the blue-eyed man that also works there.

Castiel Novak and Dean Winchester have crossed paths far too often over the last 12 years, with an unsavory outcome nearly every time. This time though, walking away is just not an option as they’re forced to collaborate on a project and learn to navigate each other like civilized human beings. For Dean and Cas though, nothing ever goes quite according to plan.

( Read here )

Title: All Violent Reforms

Author: lastknownwriter

Rating: Explicit

Words: 38,883 – Unfinished

Admin’s assessment: ★ ★ ★ ★

Admin J’s notes: I know I recced this once before and I don’t wanna do it again, but… It’s just so gooooood. Let’s all send many comments and maybe the author will continue it for us, okay? I NEED THIS TO BE FINISHED. It’s unfair to start something this good and not finish it. I’ll take back all the stars I given to it. It really should be illegal not to finish your fics if you’ve once started to publish it.

Summary: When the angel Castiel found himself married to a lonely mechanic to avoid deportation, he expected nothing in his neatly ordered world would change.

But then, he never anticipated Dean Winchester.

( Read here )

Title: Going to the Chapel

Author: nicKnack22

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Words: 11,164 – Finished

Admin’s assessment: ★ ★ ★ ★

Admin J’s notes: “You’re already perfect.”

Please, let me cry! PLEASE! my poor heart can’t take lines like that. Where is my own Dean or Cas who’s gonna say things like that to me?! Not fucking fair. Until the point in which they decide to get married right away this was so good, but I just couldn’t give it five stars because reasons. Because I’m a skeptical piece of shit, really.

Summary: And they’re gonna get married…At least, Sam and Sarah are. Dean and Cas are just pretending so that Sam’s in-laws will cut him some slack. That’s what Dean keeps telling himself anyway, as the lines between real and pretend start to blur, and he and Cas become closer and closer in the lead up to the big day.

( Read here )

Title: Le Noveau

Author: museaway

Rating: Mature

Words: 23,548 – Finished

Admin’s assessment: ★ ★ ★ ★

Admin J’s notes: Do you know the feeling when you only need to see the name of the author and you already know you’ll love the story? That what happens to me with museaway’s fics, and this one wasn’t an exception. The crossover part was good, even though those fail in many fics. I like grumpy Cas and I like how Dean freaked out and the car part (“Don’t watch, Baby”). This is awesome!

Summary: A routine haunting lands Dean in a historic hotel with his brother, a flirtatious Cas look-a-like, and a grouchy Angel of the Lord masquerading as his husband.

( Read here )

Title: We’ll pretend until we won’t

Author: flyingsolo_flyingfree

Rating: Explicit

Words: 15,750 – Finished

Admin’s assessment: ★ ★ ★

Admin J’s notes: Okay, so, I liked the idea of the story and the author’s way to write, but something held me back the entire time I was reading. I don’t know, maybe this just wasn’t my kind of a story. Which is sad because theoretically should’ve liked it more.

Summary: There’s a vengeful spirit, so Cas drops in to play the role of Dean’s fiancé. Then there are Girl Scout cookies, and dusters, and Sam makes lots of friends while Dean and Cas earn themselves the reputation of the obnoxious bickering couple.

( Read here )

Title: Oh What A Beautiful City

Author: MooseFeels

Rating: Mature

Words: 27,160 – Finished

Admin’s assessment: ★ ★

Admin A’s notes: Judging by the amount of kudos this story has everyone else loves this story :’D So I’m reccing it despite my own dislike of it. I just can’t handle the amount of angst this has. I mean I love angst but this just (for me) feels like something a teenager with no real knowledge of “life” would write. Which isn’t really a bad thing necessarily, just not something I would enjoy reading at this age. When I was fourteen I would have loved this fic though!

Admin J’s notes: The author’s name touches me in some very deep way. It’s amazing and this note has nothing to do with the fic, I just wanted to point it out.

Summary: Castiel is an omega prince, who will let himself starve to death before he can be fetched by his betrothed. Things change a little when his betrothed comes for him a bit earlier than he expected.

( Read here )

Title: Swept Inshore

Author: Marthypie

Rating: Explicit

Words: 123,766 – Ongoing

Admin’s assessment: ★ ★ ★

Admin A’s notes: I keep reccing this fic even though it’s not finished (probably abandoned), and I don’t know why because it’s not like I even love this fic. But despite not really loving this fic I’ve read it three times already! So it has to be worth reccing :’D

Summary: Castiel knew that as Prince of the Oceanic Kingdom , it was his duty to serve his King and country, and that he should feel honoured that his father had chosen him to bear the responsibility. Yet, whenever he thought about it, his heart would sink like an anchor to the bottom of the sea. Never in his life had he dreamt that his Father planned on selling him off to the Inlander nation as if he were merchandise.

( Read here )

Title:  Let the Altars Shine

Author: tiptoe39

Rating: Explicit

Words: 70,395 – Finished

Admin’s assessment: ★ ★ ★

Admin A’s notes: This was a lot better than I expected it to be, but it still wasn’t my favorite Lol. I think this rec was better suited for Admin J since all her recs sound amazing compared to these. But hey, there needs to be at least a few top Dean fics in this rec right?!

Admin J’s notes: Well, what it tells about me if I have plenty of this kinda fics…? Sad!

Summary: For the sake of his family, Dean agrees to marry an angel he’s never seen. He’s not expecting true love, nor to uncover the mystery behind why the angels are taking husbands in the first place. But sometimes in marriage, the unexpected happens.

( Read here )

Oh and I almost forgot! Please, all of you amazing followers and occasional readers, pity us poor Admins and be patient with your asks. The Box is closed for a reason atm (because once in awhile we need some time to read more fics to rec for you!), so please please please, don’t send us new asks via Submit. We like to keep that open in case someone wants to rec something for us to read! We really wish you understand! - Admins A and J

a month without uploading he comes back with a tag - whoo That no one even tagged him in he's not a challenge to drag - ouch So prepare for an attack and by that I mean cringe - cringe cause this motherfucker's bout to be dragged by his firing First things first yore freakishly tall it's weird you look like a noodle - tru You've got hair that was cool in 2007 and wet you just look like a poodle - hobbit Throw in a really annoying posh voice and yep that's dan - posh You're what would happen if Winnie the Pooh fucked slender man You procrastinate making videos, cause being judged is scary? - ooh You're so close to being forgotten your hates imaginary - woah The only reason you get views is because you're another white guy that people ship with his friend cause they think it's kawaii Oh Reasons why dans a fail -yay I'll give you some You never tweet you overeat all you do is cry and sleep Your jokes are shit posts and memes with no originality - uh huh Your family's sad you flopped your law degree at university And anything from your past you just delete you were a vegan for like three weeks then what you missed the meat? - milk wow I'm so impressed by your clear moral integrity You try so hard to be peaceful and diplomatic But can't make toast without tumblr saying your problematic - boo I could go on there's more if I check There's more things on this list than chins on your neck On your birthday you joked you were a quarter way to death 100? Yeah when getting out of bed makes you out of breath - real So your celebrity crush was j-law but now it's Evan P - mhmm wtf even is your sexuality It's hard to put you in a box when you keep it so blurry - what is it I think it's to hide that you're secretly a furry *cough* I'm joking Obviously .. Okay that went deep Repress it? Yup Before I start crying let's wrap this shit up. I'm gonna go, then masterbate and cry into a slice of pizza - feelings Shout out to the other youtubers especially Ryan Higa A cringe compilation mixed with cultural appropriation Met with no depreciation it's the YouTube nation - youtubeee Click subscribe, if you wanna watch 4 videos a year - or 3 To see my last one from 10 years ago just click over here - fail So leave a comment with your reaction you can call me a liar Cause you just witnessed the roast of Danisnotonfire

anonymous asked:

ok so i know this is a really awkward question but as someone who is possibly on the ace-spectrum i kinda have to ask like...you like porn and stuff and whatnot but you're also ace? like i think i'm ace but i've always liked porn/reading porn/the idea of sex, but at the same time i don't know if im actually attracted to people and i'm confused so like...how did you figure it out. because i saw that you have an ace tag and write a lot of porn. help?

hey there! sorry this took so long to reply to, i wanted to give you a proper answer. and i’m sorry if anything i say isn’t correct, i’m not hugely into the ace community being like 98% not out offline.

i wouldn’t say i’m ace, but i’m definitely on the spectrum - probably closer to grey/demi than straight up ace but i have days where i “feel more ace” than others lmao.

idk how familiar you are with the like … main groups? i guess? of aces?

there’s sex positive, sex-neutral, and sex-repulsed.

sex-repulsed aces are what most people think all aces are i guess? they don’t like the idea of sex, don’t want to do it, etcetc.

sex-neutral aces are just that. they don’t mind it, don’t really give a shit about it, might do it if they like their romantic partner enough but often don’t go out seeking it.

sex-positive aces (what i classify myself as) enjoy the idea of sex, or still have sex themselves. they are more likely to read/write/watch porn than the other two (though don’t get me wrong some people in the other groups do, it’s up to the person!!).

being ace doesn’t mean you have to hate sex, or avoid it, or never have it. ace people can have normal sex drives just like non-ace people (there has to be a term for that somewhere lmao). the thing that makes you ace is you don’t have a sexual attraction to other people, of any gender.

i personally figured it out because when my friends and i got to the age where we were just starting to date/have sex, i wasn’t interested. people would point at a person and say “i want to fuck that” (though usually not so crude lmao) and i would go “eh”.

i look at a person and i can say “they’re attractive”, but very rarely do i think “i want to date them” (aro spectrum yay) or “i want to fuck them”. i used to think what people said about sexual attraction was a joke, like i was sure it was just a big conspiracy theory or something. i didn’t understand why people couldn’t resist cheating, why there had to be a sex scene in like nearly every movie that wasn’t for kids. i was always like it’s just going to cause problems keep it in your pants. it just didn’t make sense to me?

i guess, as soon as i heard the term it just felt right? like a sudden epiphany feels, where everything just falls into place. i’m happy writing porn, i’m happy thinking about the interesting ways these characters can do the do, i have a sex drive, and hell, i’d probably be happy to have sex if it was a person i was in a committed relationship with. i just don’t look at a person and think i want to fuck them.

one direction // preference // he sticks up for you
  • harry: you'd always been quite shy when it came to people you weren't familiar with. but it always made it worse when the people you weren't familiar with, weren't exactly all that friendly to you. usually run ins with fans were pleasant experiences because you didn't really say all that much while harry did all the talking, signing and photographs. however, this time, the fans that had stopped you weren't the least bit friendly towards you. they took their photos with harry before one of them muttered how harry could do much better than you. you decided to ignore it since the confrontation wasn't really your thing, but harry immediately turned around to the girls and asked them to come back over. once they did, he shook his head, talking softly but sternly, 'i understand that jealousy can cause people to do ugly things, but seriously, if you have nothing nice to say; don't say anything at all. i'd appreciate it if you girls were happy that i'm happy with my girlfriend. that's really all i ask.'
  • zayn: the two of you had gone out shopping for the day, zayn deciding to spoil you with clothes and such since you would be flying home soon - and he would be staying on tour. he was holding most of your shopping bags as you looked through the clothing racks. after you'd picked out a few items, you moved to the change rooms and tried them on. you showed zayn a bit of a revealing outfit because you thought it would be nice to feel a little bit sexy. as you stepped out, you smiled at zayn, but caught two of the sales assistants whispering to each other before laughing and looking at you. immediately your heart sank, and you moved straight back into the dressing room and got back into the clothes you wore into the shop. you left the items hanging up as you walked out of the store, but zayn was talking to the sales assistants. you wanted to just get out of there, but he was adamant that he needed to scold them for being so awful to you. and he did just that - leaving the two girls red faced and speechless.
  • louis: it was on the red carpet, louis' arm around you while you both posed for the photographs being taken. this was a big enough feat for you in itself. you didn't ever feel comfortable in front of so many cameras - especially since you were just the girlfriend. not the celebrity. as you two continued down the carpet, you heard a few yells from the paparazzi and the fans, but one caught your attention. a girl behind a barrier had shouted out, 'why did you even bring her? you deserve better louis!'. though you tried to ignore it because you didn't want to make a big deal out of it; mainly so you didn't get embarrassed but also because you didn't know what you'd even say to the girl; louis had different ideas. he told you to wait there, before he walked over to the girl and quietly asked her to keep her opinion to herself and that she needs to get over her jealousy.
  • niall: you'd tagged along to one of the signings that the boys were doing for their new book. you sat to the side with some of the crew, staying out of the way but occasionally bringing over bottles of water for the boys, and helping move some of the gifts to the back. it was fun, and you were enjoying getting to see the boys interacting with all their fans and having a good time. as you brought over the bottles of water again, you stopped a little longer with niall. he leant up and pressed a kiss to your lips with a grin. the girl that was waiting for her book to be signed, rolled her eyes and muttered, 'fame-whore.' she looked straight at you as she said it, and you felt your cheeks heat and a flash of heat go through your body. you didn't say anything, taking a step back but niall reached out and grabbed your wrist, keeping you close to him. 'i think you can apologise to my girlfriend thanks.' he said to the girl who turned bright red, 'i'd like you to apologise, and realise that she's dating me because we love each other. not for anything else.'
  • liam: the two of you had gone out to an exhibition that liam's friend was holding - and it had been a generally good day. then everyone went to the after-party and had a few drinks. you were standing with liam, drink in hand, when one of the guests came up to you and with a laugh said, 'of course you're having another drink. how could you have a girlfriend like that? not in control of her at all.' she slurred to liam, shaking her head. you felt sick, and unbelievably embarrassed. you bit your lip and walked off, but liam didn't follow. he stepped closer to the girl and shook his head, 'first of all, i'm not supposed to control her. she's my girlfriend, not my fucking dog. and second of all, if you think you can say shit like that to or about her, you have another thing coming for you. i think you need to take a look at yourself before you start on other people. got it?' he said, before following you through the crowd. he took your hands and brought them to his lips, sighing, 'don't listen to it okay? none of it has any truth to it. i promise.'
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