i'm supposed to do my homework

Moffat: We don’t know if Sherlock is gay or straight because they never talk about that kind of stuff in the show

ASIP: The restaurant scene (”Do you have a boyfriend?”)

ASIB: Literally everything with Irene like seriously that episode is entirely about repressed emotions (not to mention John counts the number of texts Sherlock receives from Irene and is extremely jealous of her)

HLV: John is jealous of Janine, Sherlock hates Magnussen because he “prays on people’s secrets”, Sherlock restarts his heart for John, John’s wife is an assassin and everything gets super emotional, “Sherlock is actually a girl’s name”

TAB: The whole thing takes place in Sherlock’s gay ass mind, “correct me, doctor”, the shed scene (which I’m willing to bet Moffat wrote), we find out that Sherlock couldn’t say goodbye to John without practically overdosing himself on drugs

TLD: Sherlock gives up everything for John, we find out that both characters were suicidal before they met each other, Mrs Hudson confirms that Sherlock is emotional, “the man we both love”, “posh boy”, John is jealous of Irene again, the hug

TFP: Sherlock and John move back into 221B and start raising a child together

Moffat: Sherlock and John never talk about their emotions or anything so I guess we’ll just never know, sorry guys

Diabolik lovers? More like Diabolik Gentlemen
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) I guess Ruki really is Daddy now. Literally.

They kinda look like the Pringle man too
The signs as things I've said
  • <p> <b><p></b> <b><p></b> <b><p></b> <b>Aries:</b> A furry interacted with <i>me</i> wtf don't victimblame<p/><b>Taurus:</b> I can't tell if I'm exhaused or concussed<p/><b>Gemini:</b> Please don't imply you're attracted to my brother thats gross he's republican<p/><b>Leo:</b> The secret to my great skin is tears<p/><b>Cancer:</b> I was supposed to be doing homework yesterday but instead I just ate popcorn and stared at a wall all day <p/><b>Virgo:</b> He fucked a pool floatie, my guy<p/><b>Libra:</b> Tbh I only go to the gym to watch HGTV<p/><b>Scorpio:</b> I just want to make it clear I'm being petty right now. This is an act of pettiness<p/><b>Sagittarius:</b> I'm gonna fight them. I'm 5'4 and never been in a fight in my life but I'll kick their ass<p/><b>Capricorn:</b> Future-me can suck me ENTIRE ass for all I care I'm eating this and no earthly thing can stop me<p/><b>Aquarius:</b> I have the muscle mass of an atrophied carrot<p/><b>Pisces:</b> Worms have five hearts and you just broke all of them<p/></p><p/></p><p/></p><p/></p>

@alicedoesntsharefood tagged me in this and you’re lucky i’m procrastinating homework

Favorite line from each HS song

1. Meet Me in the Hallway
Once you go without it, nothing else will do

2. Sign of the Times
Just stop your crying, have the time of your life

3. Carolina
How would I tell her that she’s all I think about?
Well, I guess she just found out

4. Two Ghosts
Tastes so sweet, looks so real
Sounds like something that I used to feel
But I can’t touch what I see

5. Sweet Creature
We don’t know where we’re going but we know where we belong

6. Only Angel
Broke a finger knocking on your bedroom door
I got splinters in my knuckles crawling across the floor

7. Kiwi
She worked her way through a cheap pack of cigarettes
Hard liquor mixed with a bit of intellect
//
And now she’s all over me, it’s like I paid for it
It’s like I paid for it, I’m gonna pay for this

8. Ever Since New York
And I’ve been praying, I never did before
Understand I’m talking to the walls

9. Woman
I hope you can see, the shape that I’m in
While he’s touching your skin
He’s right where I should

10. From the Dining Table
Why won’t you ever be the first one to break?
Even my phone misses your call, by the way
//
Woke up to girl who looked just like you
I almost said your name

Mik Thinks

I’ve always been someone that procrastinated my work and assignments. I would just rather keep scrolling on my phone, watching the next episode of a show, basically anything rather than having to deal with the work load that I must complete.

This is why I need a ler in my life.

Obviously when it comes to lees, their form of punishment would be tickling. They want their ler to tickle them until they start their homework.

Now this would not work for me, because if my ler tickled me to start my homework, I would never end up starting it because I would just want tickles the whole time.

THATS why I need a ler that REFUSES to tickle me until I have finished my homework. They would not touch me, tickle me, tease me, or barely even pay attention to me until I had finished all the work I needed.

That would very quickly motivate me, especially if they sat near me, maybe wiggling their fingers or winking and raising their eyebrows whenever I glanced up at them.

And the second they notice my pencil going down, they have me pinned or in a hold, cooing in my ear and dragging their fingers over my body.

“That’s my good girl. Was it really so hard? Now you get a special reward from me. Tickle tickle tickle…”

Carlos Vs. Audrey Pt. 3
  • *Carlos casually sitting down doing homework*
  • Carlos: Where is Ben? He was supposed to be here 10 minutes ago.
  • Audrey: *Walks up* Aw, Ben late for your little study date? I can't wait to see your face when he comes crawling back to to me. He's already started hinting he wants to get back together...
  • Carlos: *About to respond but Ben runs up*
  • Ben: Hey Carlos. Sorry, I'm late but I saw this nice little puppy keychain and it made me think of you cause your my puppy prince and I love you so much...
  • Oh hi Audrey. Didn't see ya there.
  • Carlos: ...
  • Audrey: I... You... Uh... oh forget it.

*types this up on phone while sick bc fck th police*

He was supposed to hate her, they were enemies after all, yet he felt a need for her. It wasn’t a sexual need, there were no wet dreams or cold showers when he thought of her. Even so, just the sight of her made him crave her.

Her pale skin, large and innocent eyes, small lips parted just so, dark hair that skimmed her shoulders…everything about her made his mind stop working.

This couldn’t go on.

He was the bad guy, a thief, a liar, and a murderer. She was the good guy, the savior, the hope, and, well, everything he wasn’t. They were opponents, opposites, other words that began with “oppo-” hell if he knew he wasn’t smart in that way.

Why was it that he wanted her? What way did he even want her? It wasn’t sexual, that he knew, but he doubted it was anything platonic or, god forgive, romantic. He didn’t deserve those anyway. Yet he was sure that someone like her would try to find something in him to forgive, something in him for redemption, something that wasn’t there.

Little Red, little Red, why did he care for her so?

Perhaps in a different world he would be deserving of her, deserving of kindness and forgiveness. But this was not that world.

Later, when he was enveloped by darkness, he briefly believed in reincarnation, briefly believed he would see her again in that better world. But he knew better.

Ah, he should have just hated her.

The quiet walk through the park was interrupted by the soft sound of music. Eyes filled with curiosity, Sherlock followed it to its source, John behind him, only to find an old man sitting on a bench, holding a turntable on his knees.
The first notes of La vie en rose resonated in the night.
Soon, the music brought other people, their steps muffled by the snow, conversations dying as they shared a moment of quiet contemplation. A moment after, a young woman extended her hand towards her partner, taking him in the center of the approximate circle that had been formed by the listeners. As if nobody was there, they started dancing.
Whispers followed as more couples decided to do the same, taking place in the center of the path, hand in hand, stars in their eyes.
Sherlock watched them, transcended by the music, when he noticed that John had taken his hand, stroking his thumb over Sherlock’s palm. When he looked at John, he saw an invitation.
Sherlock swallowed, nodding, and soon, John was taking him towards the other dancers. Public demonstrations of affection had never been something that they considered easy: occasional touches, kisses when nobody was looking, whispers that nobody else could hear. Nothing more, mostly because it was something they reserved for their intimate moments at home, far away from journalists, curious fans and other, even less understandable crowd. Not that they were ashamed or hiding anything, yet it was a mutual agreement that they had reached, months ago.
That night, nothing could stand in their way.
Sherlock’s eyes locked on John’s smile as they took place in the small crowd, feeling his partner’s hand on his waist, dragging him closer. They started to sway, slowly, as Edith Piaf’s words translated emotions he could not put words on through words from another language he did not understand. Sherlock quickly ran his eyes over the couples around them, and when he came upon the fact that nobody was minding them, he put his head on John’s shoulder, bringing their bodies even closer. John huffed, passing one hand around Sherlock’s neck, warmth spreading under his touch as he hummed the tune in Sherlock’s ear.
Snow started to fall, snowflakes catching in John’s hair.
Soon, Sherlock knew, the music would stop, and they would walk back home, hand in hand, climbing the steps to 221b, kissing along the way, finding shelter in front of the fireplace and in each other’s arms.  
Soon, he knew, yet he wanted to stretch that moment across a thousand years, praying for the music to never stop, for the snow to keep on falling, for John to keep on holding him. In that moment, they were alone, dancing in the park, and it was just the two of them against the whole universe.
Sherlock closed his eyes. This is what forever looks like, he decided.

Keep reading

and also while i don’t watch a lot of ben brode’s developer commentary and i don’t like to shit on the guy or team 5 in general because it’s obvious they’re at least TRYING to do the best they can i don’t think ben brode understands the MTG design philosophy behind “there has to be bad cards”

betrayal is a good example of a good bad hearthstone card. 3 mana spell, give your opponent one of your minions. on the surface it’s a shitty card because it just gives your opponent an advantage over you, but there are ways you can manipulate its usage to facilitate it being good in certain decks (i.e, treachery defile howlfiend)

but brode seems to think that good bad cards are things that look appealing to newer players until they see a better card and realize it’s better. that learning experience of why its a bad idea to play goldshire footman is interesting to look at but at the same time introducing cards people can’t get use out of AT ALL or nerfing cards to below play standards anyone would conform to while still facilitating super overpowered cards and cheap deck types just guarantees that a bunch of cards will never see play

when’s the last time you saw a fucking seadevil stinger outside of arena

or to use brode’s well repeated example, executus

the only time i’ve EVER seen executus played was when someone was using it to use betrayal to give the OTHER player executus so he could kill him with it once executus set his health to 8

another good bad card is unlicensed apothecary, the 3 mana 5/5 that hurts you for 5 whenever you summon a minion

it’s borderline unplayable but at the same time it’s a really interesting card in that it has incredible stats for its cost but it also keeps you from swarming the board. its a decent 3 drop for control decks on turn 3 but afterward its hot garbage. 

but at the same time, the fact that it has UPSIDES means that it has potential for skilled players and new players alike to try it out and see what results it gives them