i'm still sick so that's my excuse for why nothing i make will be pretty

"ferris bueller's day off" starters
  • "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it."
  • "If I get caught, I don't graduate."
  • "Well, we've had a bit of bad luck this morning as you may have heard."
  • "This is my ninth sick day this semester. It's pretty tough coming up with new illnesses. If I go for ten, I'm probably going to have to barf up a lung, so I better make this one count."
  • "Twenty bucks says he's in his car right now debating on whether or not to go out."
  • "Excuse me. If whoever was in this house is still in the house, I'd like you to know that I've just called the police. I'd also like to add that I've got my father's gun and a SCORCHING case of herpes."
  • "What a little asshole."
  • "This is ridiculous making me wait around the house for you."
  • "Whatever mileage we put on, we'll take off."
  • "I'm going to take a stand. I'm going to defend it. Right or wrong, I'm going to defend it."
  • "I think I see my dad."
  • "How can I possibly be expected to handle school on a day like this?"
  • "I meant, are you in here for drugs?"
  • "Um, he's/she's/they're sick. My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with the girl who saw [name] pass out at 31 Flavors last night. I guess it's pretty serious."
  • "The city looks so peaceful from up here."
  • "The key to faking out the parents is the clammy hands. It's a good non-specific symptom; I'm a big believer in it. A lot of people will tell you that a good phony fever is a deadlock, but, uh... you get a nervous mother, you could wind up in a doctor's office. That's worse than school. You fake a stomach cramp, and when you're bent over, moaning and wailing, you lick your palms."
  • "Thank you, no. I'm straight."
  • "It's a little childish and stupid, but then, so is high school."
  • "Drugs?"
  • "You fellas have nothing to worry about. I'm a professional."
  • "Anything is peaceful from one thousand, three hundred and fifty-three feet."
  • "So THAT'S how it is in their family..."
  • "You make me get out of bed, you make me come over here."
  • "[Name], you're my hero."
  • "Why can't you let me rot in peace?"
  • "It is his fault he didn't lock the garage."
  • "Les jeux sont faits. Translation; the game is up. Your ass is mine.
  • "Why'd you kick me?"
  • "A; You can never go too far. B; If I'm gonna get busted, it is NOT gonna be by a guy like that."
  • "I don't trust this kid any further than I can throw him."
  • "I don't remember him being sick nine times."
  • "You killed the car."
  • "There's someone you should talk to."
  • "We're going to get busted."
  • "[Name], this one's for you."
  • "Okay, [name], can we just let it go, please?"
  • "Go piss up a flagpole."
  • "I do have a test today, that wasn't bullshit. It's on European socialism. I mean, really, what's the point? I'm not European. I don't plan on being European. So who gives a crap if they're socialists? They could be fascist anarchists, it still doesn't change the fact that I don't own a car."
  • "The question isn't 'what are we going to do,' the question is 'what AREN'T we going to do?'"
  • "Never had one lesson!"
  • "If you had access to a car like this, would you take it back right away?"
  • "A man with priorities so far out of whack doesn't deserve such a fine automobile."
  • "Did you blow him away or somethin'?"
  • "Uh, what country do you think this is?"
  • "You wear too much eye makeup. My sister wears too much. People think she's a whore."
  • "Why are you here?"
  • "He's licking the glass and making obscene gestures with his hands."
  • "Who do you love? You love a car!"
  • "Sooner or later, everyone goes to the zoo."
  • "I can't drive when you're yelling at me!"
  • "Only the meek get pinched. The bold survive."
  • "He's gonna marry me."
  • "If you say '[name]', you lose a testicle."
  • "Be a man, take some Pepto-Bismol, get dressed and come on over here, I'm tired of this stuff."
  • "Between grief and nothing... I'll take grief."
  • "I asked for a car, I got a computer. How's that for being born under a bad sign?"
  • "We'll drive home backwards."
  • "Four thousand restaurants in the downtown area, I pick the one my father goes to."
  • "Pardon my French, but you're an asshole!"
  • "If you're not over here in fifteen minutes, you can find a new best friend."
  • "Here's where [name] goes berserk."
  • "You just sounded like Dirty Harry just then."
  • "You realize if we played by the rules right now we'd be in gym?"
  • "I am not going to sit on my ass as the events that affect me unfold to determine the course of my life."
  • "I weep for the future."
  • "Now, I didn't hit you. I lightly slapped you."
  • "Not that I condone fascism, or any -ism for that matter."
  • "Pardon my French, but [name] is so tight that if you stuck a lump of coal up his/her/their ass, in two weeks you'd have a diamond."
  • "Incredible, one of the worst performances of my career and they never doubted it for a second."
  • "Look, don't make me participate in your stupid crap if you don't like the way I do it."
  • "Where's your brain?"
  • "You're not dying, you just can't think of anything good to do."
  • "Don't worry about it, I don't even have a piece of shit. I have to envy yours."
  • "The man could squash my nuts into oblivion."
  • "If anyone needs a day off, it's [name]. He/She/They has/have a lot of things to sort out before he graduates. Can't be wound up this tight and go to college, his roommate will kill him/her/them."
  • "You're still here? It's over!"

this is not a post in defense of leopold fitz. this is a post about leopold fitz, and being an asshole, and bravery, and friendship, and love, written by someone to whom leopold fitz is very important, and who watched that scene last night and thought holy shit that is the exact kind of asshole i would be in that situation. a few notes before i really start:

1) i don’t do straight meta very often. when i want to talk about something in long form, i usually write fic, and in fact i have written fic that deals with this theme somewhat with the we could be heroes trilogy. but i don’t have the time or energy to work this into new fic in the sort of time frame i would want to do it, so i’m just going to give it my best shot.

2) this story line blows. i think i’ve been rather vocal in my feelings about this. it’s like the writers decided that in order to have other story lines progress, they had to stick fitzsimmons in some sort of hideous time loop. they’re really only a half step up from cutting and pasting the same lines from script to script at this point. that’s part of why the scene last night sucked so much; it was all the shit that had already happened in the past like 10 episodes, but dialed up to eleven

that being said, i’ve seen a couple different posts today talking about how the fitzsimmons scene last night was detrimental to fitz’s character, or even out of character. and i’d just like to say, once again stating how important leopold fitz is to me and how much i identify with him, that fitz was a complete asshole there, and he was also almost totally in-character (ok, with the exception of the last line there. that was either poorly worded by fitz in order to demonstrate that fitz is bad at talking about things with real people words, or was lazily worded by the writers because they honestly don’t care much about this story line right now. it was just a little too cruel for me to believe it’s something fitz would actually say to jemma, even fueled by sadness and anger and hurt and this sense of betrayal he’s feeling. it was a little too heavy handed), and it’s in-character because of one simple fact: the thing that leopold fitz cares about the most is being brave.

now, this is where someone (probably more than one someone) goes ‘but zoe awkwardspiritanimals, what about loyalty? isn’t that what we’re supposed to think of when we think of fitz, who risked infection with an alien virus, who shot a man for may, who stuck with ward until almost literally the last possible second?’ and the answer to that is yes, that is what we’re supposed to think about. but this post is about something different.

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