i'm sorry it is so text heavy but i loved this

anonymous asked:

please tell me you have >:^3 x :^( hcs

  • asra helps feed muriel’s chickens and when they cluck he’ll cluck back just because he knows muriel thinks it’s funny (i think muriel just talks to them normally like they’re people)
  • we don’t know anything about muriel’s wolf pal but asra loves them. he tries to play catch with them and teach them tricks and muriel has to remind him that a wolf isn’t exactly like a dog……asra please…..
  • faust likes hiding in muriel’s hood
  • muriel just loves faust a lot. asra accuses him of loving faust more than him. muriel doesn’t respond. he’s too busy playing with her.
  • sometimes when asra is feeling especially lazy he’ll ask muriel to carry him. it’s gotten to the point where he doesn’t even need to ask, he’ll just raise his arms up and look at him
  • generally speaking i think muriel is more comfortable with being touched by asra than other people. he’s known him for a long time so he’s gotten used to being touched by him. muriel still rarely initiates touching, but sometimes he’ll touch his shoulder or hold his hand.
  • asra likes leaning his entire body on muriel because he knows he can support him. he also likes sprawling out on muriel & just taking a little nap because he’s so big and warm but muriel hates it because sometimes he wants to get up and feels bad making asra get up. #catownerproblems
  • they have a bunch of inside jokes that they have developed over a span of years. they’ll reference them in front of other people without explaining them at all.
  • muriel doesn’t talk very often but when he feels really bad, asra can tell and will try to sit him down and have him talk. he kind of hesitates but eventually he does and feels a lot better afterwards
  • muriel also tries to take care of asra and i think this really came into play when the apprentice went catatonic. asra was so sad and muriel tried to comfort/help him as much as he could. i think that’s why muriel even warns the apprentice in the first place, because he’s seen asra so upset over them. he doesn’t want anything bad to happen to them or asra again.

anonymous asked:

hi viria, i was wondering what brand/kind of make up do you use? i get so overwhelmed looking at youtube videos because it feels like you need a lot like foundation, concealer, powder, primer, etc. and i'm worried it'll look really obvious/bad but you make it look natural and subtle

on wwh, thank you!

Personally, I don’t feel like myself with heavy make up and I think it doesn’t quite suit me, so I’m happy to know what I do is liked by someone! 

But I feel like I might use a lot of stuff too? A year ago or so I happened to get myself into korean skincare/makeup, so ended up getting a bunch of stuff, mostly for skincare, but still. My foundation, highlighter, a few lip tints and blushes are from there. I think from what I use on a regular basis I only have loreal concealer and some cheet eyeshadows that are mass market. 

Generally tho, everything I have is mass market because cool things american youtubers use in their videos are. very. expensive here, so korean ones are good alternative for me. Like, usual maxfactor foundation probably costs around 200 grn, korean be a bit more expensive but I feel like the quality is a bit better would be around 200-400 w hile something like mac or nyx (and those are the most affordable) are 600 and up to 1500 or so…

ANYWAY! I drew a tutorial of what I tend to do on a regular basis as in my go to makeup! 

For step 2, I tend to use soothing/brightening cream right after I wash my face, so I don’t use it right before I do my make up (unless it’s sunscreen)

3. I LOVE BEING DEWY okay, I try to find the good balance between dewy and looking oily, but so far I think it works. My last fave is secret key tattoo cover cushion foundation, but I’m running out of it.. it’s what I used for the past 4 months or so. As for concealer, I use loreal with brush that you have to swirl to get the product out which I don’t remember how to call but it’s subtle, covers bags quite nicely and doesn’t look heavy:3

to be honest mostly I just use my blush as an eyeshadow..Unless i use something brownish. I don’t know the brands I have but they vere like 20 grn back in the day, so. very. cheap stuff.

as for lips, I mostly use matte or semi matte lipsticks or tints, they are easier to smudge and my hair doesn’t stick on it which is very important! 

Generally, from what I learnt, you don’t need a super excessive amount on a daily basis? I don’t have a single bronzer or contour palette or specified brow products and I only use what I have in eyeshadows for that. same ashy brown somehow looks nice as contour and as my eyebrow shadow.

I think it’s hard not to get overwhelmed at the amount of products a lot of people use in their videos, but…I’m not sure, maybe it’s just the quality of what I buy here, but I can’t say primer EVER changed anything for me. Like my foundation still lasts however long it can, with or without it. Or those fancy glowy or moistrusing essanses instagram beauties drop all over their faces, i’m not even sure what are those and how necessary those kinds of things are.

I guess focus more on the products you actually need instead of those people say you absolutely have to purchase.

I’m sorry I don’t know if it helps but I hope it does at least a little bit! 

PS I think there will be many typos and I’m sorry for them, but for some reason I can’t fix them without deleting every single letter in front of my typo:( tumblr text is hard


okay so @all-you-see-is-nightmare-eyes and i have been talking about an au where connor, evan, jeremy and michael met and it got shippy. very detailed /cries/ headcannons below.

- The main reason the four of them met was because they found each other at the orchard. Evan and Connor were on a date, they had a picnic ready and everything, and Michael wanted to explore the place so Jeremy was forced to come with him.

- Michael had tripped on one of the paths and fell off of it, down the slight slope they were on, right in front of Connor and Evan. Evan nearly had a heart attack when it happened, and when Jeremy came running down, he nearly had one all over again. Connor was just confused.

- Well, after Jeremy made sure Michael was okay, the four of them talked a little. And, with the awkward introductions thrown aside, they immediately hit it off. Evan and Connor thought the two of them were cool and full of funny stories, and Jeremy and Michael thought that they were pretty chill and nice.

- Somehow, an hour had passed and the boyf riends had somehow edged their way into the tree bros date - and they didn’t mind at all.

- Eventually, Connor and Evan decided that they had to go and gathered their things with the help of Jeremy and Michael. Jeremy kept apologising for barging in on their date, so much so that Evan of all people had to calm him down.

- They walked to their seperate cars, but before any of them could get in and drive away, Connor ran over and asked for their numbers. The boyf riends gave him their numbers, and he texted both of them Evan’s number. After that, they all left.

- And just like that, a group chat was made and they were all texting day and night.

- Turns out Michael and Jeremy lived the next town over - an hour away from Evan and Connor.

- Evan and Connor visited one time during the weekend, expecting to hang out for a couple of hours and then head back home - they ended up staying the entire weekend.

- Eventually, the tree bros came over to visit every weekend, sometimes during the weekdays for the hell of it.

- They all torture Jeremy’s dad for fun tbh.

- “wow you actually wear pants - i really wanted to see the ducky underwear you own”

- “thanks mr. ducky - i mean mr. heere.”

- Eventually Michael and Jeremy visit Evan and Connor for the first time, and they all end up going to Evan’s house because Connor’s house is a “no-go”, as he says.


- None of them have spoken about the Squips or the suicide attempts. They feel like they should just hide it and act like normal kids.

- One day Evan is just kind of watching the boyf riends play video games as Connor draws. He notices how Jeremy sticks the tip of his tongue out when he’s concentrated, how Michael’s eyes sparkle every time he beats a level, how they loudly shriek in sync when something bad happens and he. just. realizes how much he loves them.

- Evan gets all awkward and blushy around the three of them and every time they try to touch him or ask what’s wrong he just says he’s fine and pulls away.

- “did we do something wrong?” “I - I - I’M F - FINE”

- Since they’re have their regular “sleepover all weekend” things, Jeremy decides that they should camp outside because Evan likes nature, right? The rest of them agree.

- When they all go outside, they find a fireplace and decide to gather sticks and stuff for firewood.

- Michael and Connor totally fight each other with the sticks. it’s a fact.

- Eventually they all calm down and Jeremy gets a fire lit, and they’re just talking about things. Heavy things, the things they usually try not to talk about.

- Somehow, none of them slip up about the suicide attempts or the Squips, but when Evan speaks up he talks about how he feels like he’s a burden and that he’ll never be good enough for anything.

- The boys immediately jump to action, saying that they all like Evan so much, so god damn much and that they would probably die for him.

- Evan is so overwhelmed by the response - here are these beautiful men, all looking at him, worry and affection displayed on their dimly lit faces and. Evan just. explodes.

- “I think I’m in love with all of you?” And they boys are shocked, but Evan continues. “I don’t know how - I didn’t even think it was humanly possible but here we are?? And like it’s scary because I can’t even handle having a crush on one person, so why three? Why now? Why -”

- And Michael just cuts him off and says “I love you too.”

- And Jeremy and Connor just share a look and sigh in relief and they’re both like “yeah we kind of talked to eachother about our feelings already we were just waiting for you two..”

- So now there’s four blushing boys sitting in a backyard at 2 am, having spilled their feelings out for each other, unaware of what to do next.

- And then Michael asks Evan if he can kiss him and Evan is like “!!!!!!!!” and nods, and they share a small kiss.

- Jeremy speaks up, his face flushed as he talks. “Are we all.. dating now?”

- Connor and Evan share a look and smile.

- “Yeah, we are.”


i like seeing you laugh

please tell me i’m not the only person in the world still thinking about passe på meg. i think of it as their little private i love you scene.

Isak and Even are two teenage boys. they don’t often sit down to discuss the intricacies of their relationship, they don’t verbalise every feeling. they don’t verbalise it, but we are shown it. when they hang out in mekke øl and hjernen er alene, their conversation is sometimes inaudible because the focus is not on what they’re saying but instead on how they make each other feel. they make each other laugh. they make each other laugh a lot. they make each other shine. maybe their jokes are hilarious, or maybe their jokes are terribly unfunny, it doesn’t matter, because dating someone who makes you laugh doesn’t mean you need to date a comedian, it means dating someone with whom you vibe so well that their mere presence relaxes you, being with them makes you laugh. we see that a lot with Isak and Even. good vibes and good laughs. how being around each other is effortless because they can just be.

so when Isak touches Even’s lower lip and says i like seeing you laugh, it’s a casual remark, but it’s also this this intimate, honest confession, because that’s how they make each other feel, they make each other laugh. and he likes it. he doesn’t have a word for it yet, but he knows the feeling’s good. they’re good. you don’t always need to say i love you. sometimes making them laugh is better. when the night is dark and heavy, sometimes laughter is the only way out.

so that’s the i love you of a boy who is young and learning and figuring things out.

i was there to meet you, on the other hand. it should be this dramatic moment, a plot twist, a huge revelation, a guarded secret that Even has kept inside all this time, finally ready to let it unravel. and yet it’s anything but. it’s a nonchalant statement, it’s a how was school we’re running out of toilet paper it’s pretty windy today by the way i was there to meet you. Even’s kept it a secret for so long because it’s not a secret. he says it like he’s stating the obvious, because to him it is the most obvious thing, nothing has ever been more clear to him. the possibility of him having been there for any other reason is nonexistent, and it’s ridiculous that anyone would think otherwise, especially Isak. but i saw you on the first day of school is different. it’s more quiet, half a whisper. Even becomes gentle and pensive, like he remembers something, remembers that first day of school. because this is the part that is not obvious to him. this part where he is lying in bed with the boy he saw on the very first day of school, wearing his clothes, wearing his smell, wearing his kindness and his patience and his understanding. this the part that is maybe a dream.

and my favourite part? it’s Isak’s little ‘oh’. that’s literally all he says. he doesn’t ask Even to elaborate, doesn’t ask any questions, where exactly did you see me, what was i doing, what did you think, what, when, why why why. just oh. and then he smiles. because he believes it. he accepts it. two weeks ago he was ready to believe that everything was a lie because what would someone like Even ever see in a boy like him. now he knows better. he believes it, he accepts it, and he relishes it. and then they smile at each other, because that’s how they make each other feel. they make each other laugh and smile. and it’s good. whatever this is, it’s good. it’s good, yeah.

porcupine-girl  asked:

I'm desperate for any zimbits bc the ao3 tag has been dead slow lately... So literally anything, but if you want a prompt how about bedsharing? Or maybe a blind date?

let’s uhhh not talk about how long ago you sent this to me, but bedsharing on their first night Providence? let’s do it! 

Bitty collapsed onto the guest bed as soon as he closed the door behind him, burying his face in the nearest pillow and groaning. He wasn’t sure exactly what brand of panic had taken hold of him just then, but the end result was him sleeping alone in Jack’s guestroom apparently. This was not how he had pictured their week alone together in Providence going.

He fumbled for his phone in his pocket and stared at the bright screen morosely. 11:09 P.M. His groan was more whine than anything this time and he kicked his legs on the bed for good measure. It was almost half-past by the time he peeled himself up from the bed to change into his sleep clothes.

Bitty sighed at his reflection in a wall mirror as he pulled on a loose-fitting shirt that had “MADISON HIGH FOOTBALL” printed in large block letters across the front. There were dark bags under his eyes from losing sleep to both excitement and anxiousness in the weeks leading up to this visit and although he’d been lifting and running all summer per the Jack Zimmermann Workout Plan that had been texted to him at an ungodly hour every morning, he still looked scrawny to his own eyes.

He pulled at the hem of the shirt, considering, before tugging it back over his head. He stood up a little straighter and looked at his reflection again, forcing himself to see the broader shoulders and muscle definition that hadn’t been there last year. He took a deep breath and looked towards his closed door, thinking of Jack probably already soundly asleep down the hallway and how warm his bed would probably be. He took one more look back at the empty, still-made guest bed and nodded decisively.

“C’mon, Bitty,” he muttered to himself. “You can do this.”

Keep reading

Sick Day

Originally posted by m-pott

Tom Holland x Reader

Request: Yes

Summary: After finding out your boyfriend is sick, you come to his rescue with a shit ton of snuggles and medicine.

Word Count: 1,310

Warnings: Language, fluff, sick!Tom, phobia of being sick (?), needy!Tom, snuggles beyond this world (lemme tell ya, GEEZ.)

A/N: Guess who’s back, m'friends! I apologize for my sudden “disappearance” lol. School and personal stuff has been really weighing me down. I won’t share the juicy details. For the anon that requested this, I hope I did it justice. :// As always, feedback is appreciated. Enjoy reading!

Waking up on a bright, sunny Saturday, you jump out of bed with a giddiness in your bones.

Maybe it was because of the weekend… or possibly the Ben & Jerry’s ice cream you have saved for your binge day today.

Either way, you were bubbling with so much happiness that it started to alarm you. Especially since you weren’t one to really express emotions all the time. 

However, that was put to a halt when you got a text from your boyfriend, Tom.

Tom: To Y/N

Baaaabe, I think I’m sick.

Oh, c'mon!

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Hey I love your writing! Can I please have a Niall imagine where you get into a bad fight and he walks out and comes back later when he's calm down to find you in the bathroom crying holding something of his? Kind of specific I'm sorry!! 💖

~1,527 words


“God (Y/N) i just want to go out with the lads for a beer. Get off my back!” He snapped at you while he stomped out of the bedroom and down the hall. Jumping off the bed you followed him.

“Get off your back?! Niall, you’ve gone out for a beer every night this week and the last. You’re at the studio all fucking day and you come home late. I just want one night with you!” He didn’t even react to your words as he went to the closet and pulled out his jacket and boots. “Are you fucking listening? Sometimes I feel like you don’t care anymore. You stopped texting me during the day, and stopped saying goodbye in the mornings. You haven’t even said ‘I love You’ since last saturday.” Tears threatened to fall from your eyes as you watched him slip his boots on his feet. You hate fighting and you hate acting this clingy but it felt like he wasn’t even in love with you anymore.

Niall finally made eye contact with you, anger was present in his blue eyes. The way he looked at you made your heart drop to your stomach. “Maybe I go out all the time because you’re so goddamn needy. You constantly want my attention. And I have other things to worry about then saying I love you.”  He pulled his hat onto his head, “Don’t bother waiting up. I might even just crash at Bressie’s house.” His voice had no hint of emotion, turning on his heel he left without another word.

You stood, frozen, staring at the closed front door. You’ve been dating for two years and this was the first fight where you actually felt like he was going to leave you. Even when he was pissed he would still say he loves you, but the look in his eyes made you feel as though that love was gone. Niall did have a loose tongue and would say things he didn’t mean but the words he just said seemed like they were from his heart.

The tears you tried to hold back now fell freely from your eyes, drenching your cheeks. Your feet absent mindedly carried you back to the bedroom and into the walk in closet where you found his favorite sweater. The cream colored fabric still smelled like his cologne and body wash. Taking the sweater into the bathroom you closed the door and sank down to the cool tile floor where you then let all your emotions out. Heavy sobs racked through your body as you hid your face in Niall’s sweater, desperate to feel close to the man you loved; even though it was starting to feel like that love wasn’t mutual.


“You good mate?” Deo asked Niall while he nudged his shoulder, “You’ve been zoning in out all night.”

“It’s just- I’m fine.” He responded taking another sip of his Guinnes. His anger and frustration had worn off a while ago and the gravity of what he said, and didn’t say, was just now hitting him. Guilt filled his stomach the more he realized you were right.

“What did you do, Horan?” Another one of the lads asked, all of his friends eyes were on him now.

“I had a fight with (Y/N) before I left and I was a dick.”

“What was it about?” Bressie asked.

“She wanted me ta stay home tonight and watch a movie. She was also upset that I’ve been going out a lot and haven’t really spent time with her.”

“You have been going out a lot though and you’re living in the studio. Why didn’t ya just stay home?” Deo pointed out.

“I- I don’t know, I’m just stressed that the album isn’t gonna be that good and I just wanted a beer. I’m an ass okay, now I wish I just stayed home. Wouldn’t be surprised if I go home and find that all her stuff is gone.” The last sentence almost brought tears to his eyes, he had to bite his lip to prevent himself from crying in front of his friends.

“Why don’t ya just go home, man.”

Niall took a deep breath to ward of his tears before nodding and grabbing his hat off the table, “Bye guys.” He said standing up and leaving without waiting for a response. His boots tapped on the pavement as he made his way to the range rover, telling the fans that he couldn’t stop for pictures. The whole drive back to the house he tried to piece together an apology, he stopped at a gas station and got a bouquet of flowers and all your favorite types of candy. He knew that the flowers and candy would do little to make up for the way he has been acting but it was worth a shot.

When he pulled into the driveway he sighed in relief to see your car still parked but as he looked into the windows he saw that all the lights were off. “Shit.” He muttered under his breath thinking that maybe you got one of your friends to pick you up.

He slowly came into the home and toed off his boots listening for any sign that you were still in the house. Niall had never been so happy to still see your shoes lying on the floor, it was one of his pet peeves that you didn’t put them away on the rack in the closet. He didn’t hear the tv in the den or in the bedroom, it was still fairly early in the evening so he doubted that you had gone to sleep. Wondering around the house he called out for you, “(Y/N)?! Petal, where are ya? I’m sorry I’m such an ass.”

You were still in the bathroom crying, the fight had happened two hours ago but you were still upset. Everytime your tears would slow you’d think about the words Niall said to you and you were right back to sobbing. His sweater was soaked with tears at this point, probably another thing that would make Niall mad at you.

Niall had given up on trying to find you, he walked into the bedroom dropping the bag of candy and flowers on the bed with a huff. He went to go into the bathroom but when he turned the knob and open the door the last thing he expected to see was you sitting on the floor crying with his sweater held tightly in your hands.

Your hair was messily hanging out of your ponytail,  your face was red and blotchy, and your eyelids swollen from crying so much. “Babe..” Niall sighed sinking down to the floor next to you. His presents made you jump, looking up at him you let out a choked sob. All you wanted to do was jump into his arms and hold onto him but he told you you were needy so you stayed where you were.

“Come here princess.” He said sadly pulling you into his chest and rubbing your back. Tears soaked into his shirt but he didn’t care, “I’m so fucking sorry my love. I didn’t mean anything I said. You’re not needy or clingy and nothing is more important than you. I’ve just been really stressed and I didn’t want to burden you with it so I’d just go out.”

“Then why di-d you say that?” You said into his chest, your breath hitched as you tried to talk.

Niall’s heart broke as he heard your voice, “Because I’m stupid and ya know that. I’ve been struggling to get the album together and today was particularly rough, I took that frustration out on you and I’m really sorry about that.”

The two of you sat on the bathroom floor for a good ten minutes before you finally looked up at him, he smiled down at you sadly before pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. “Do ya forgive me?” Niall asked.

“Yeah,” You answered. “Do you forgive me?”

“There’s nothing for me to forgive darlin’, ya did nothing wrong. You were right, I wasn’t spending enough time with you. So tomorrow we’re gonna go out for dinner and a movie then I want ya to tag along to the studio with me. Sound good?”

You nodded cuddling closer into his chest. “Why did ya take my sweater?” He asked. You blushed not wanting to tell him but you did anyway.

“I-I just wanted to feel a close to you.” You responded, your cheeks even redder now. Your answer made Niall realize just how much you missed him and it made him feel like shit.

“I’m sorry love.” He whispered into your hair. “Why don’t we go lay on bed instead of sitting on the hard tile. I also got ya all your favorite candy and some flowers.” You chuckled at his thoughtfulness and the fact that he got you candy and flowers to apologize.

Niall helped you stand and led you by your hand into the bedroom where you both stuffed your face with candy while you just enjoyed each other’s company.

twitter:heartbrokennjh // Wattpad:brokenboyclifford

Early Morning

Description: "Why did I wake up to the sound of the blender at nearly six in the morning?“ aka Harry bought a new blender and it’s the loudest thing ever.

Pairing: Reader (Y/N) x Harry

Word Count: 601

You were tired. Dead tired. Yesterday, you and Harry had walked around, buying a few things and just enjoying New York City. It was a day that you could have again and again. You didn’t see Harry too often because of his upcoming tour and the premieres of his role in Dunkirk. So you were grateful for the experience of the city.

The plane ride back to London was long and you were excited to return home. The two of you made dinner and watched a short movie before resorting to your bed. As you and Harry walked to bed, you could feel your eyelids becoming heavy. It wasn’t normal for you to tour cities like Harry did, so the bed sounded amazing.

"I have a meeting tomorrow morning, but I should be back in the afternoon,” Harry mentioned.

You were so tired that you just nodded and crawled underneath the covers. Harry chuckled and kissed your temple before wrapping an arm around your side.

You were in a deep slumber when a noise so loud and terrifying made you jump awake. Your heart was racing and you grabbed for Harry. However, he wasn’t there. The sheets were cold and the covers were slightly thrown to the side. You glanced at the clock and realized it was five-thirty a.m. and Harry was using the blender to make his morning smoothie.

You breathed heavily for a few more seconds before tossing the covers off of your body. You stomped to the kitchen, watching your boyfriend walk around shirtless. You softened up a bit, but as the sound of the blender continued, you became more annoyed.

You walked over to Harry, tapping his shoulder. He jumped, clearly scared. You raised your eyebrows, motioning towards the very loud blender. Harry turned it off, grinning nervously at you.

“Why did I wake up to the sound of the blender at nearly six in the morning?” you asked. Your voice was nearly threatening. You weren’t mad at Harry, just annoyed that you could’ve gotten a few more hours of sleep.

“I’m sorry, love. I didn’t really realize how loud this new blender was going to be,” Harry admitted. He glanced at the blender, realizing he may not be making any smoothies right away in the morning.

You groaned. “It’s fine, Harry. I was just expecting to actually get some sleep.” You grabbed for a mug and a tea bag.

“You’re staying up?” Harry asked, indicating to your materials.

“I won’t be able to sleep. It’s fine,” you smiled at Harry. “I’m still annoyed, though.”

You laughed as Harry pouted. “I won’t use the blender this early anymore. I promise.”

He leaned in for a kiss. You quickly tried to peck his lips, but he grabbed your waist and deepened the kiss. He placed a hand behind your head. You kissed him back, enjoying the little intimate moment.

Harry pulled back reluctantly. “I would love to continue this, but my meeting is in an hour and the commute is likely going to take me forty-five minutes. Maybe when I come home, yeah?” he asked, looking into your eyes.

You laughed. “Of course. Text me what you want for dinner, otherwise I’m ordering pizza” you said as you gave his bum a few pats. He nodded. You grabbed your mug of tea and headed back to your bedroom to read for a bit.

“Love you,” Harry called out after grabbing his smoothie and heading for the door.

“Love you, too!” you responded. Not soon after, you heard the door close and you were alone in you and Harry’s home.

There is a thousand worlds where I wasn’t born, but I am still here and it’s really not my parents’ fault they only give life, what you do with it is ultimately up to you. I guess I’ve changed a lot since way back when I didn’t know a damn thing. I used to have a lot of friends, where are you? I guess we’ve grown apart a few oceans too deep to recognize youth that has faded. There’s too much pain inside of us, where do those tears truly come from? A place that I can’t see, rip it out from me, take the rain away from these clouds and let the sky fall down twice, let my body hit the ground with the force of flowers and spring– let my soul grow into the vines that’ll wrap us from skin to bone, let my words be the last thought you have tonight. I had to overdose to learn a bit about self-control. I had to break into pieces to learn that the kind of love I need first is that kind of love that I can’t give to others. So when she looks me dead in the eyes and tells me that she loves me– I don’t know how to say that I love her back, the truth is I’m all out of that. That? That is the words I can’t repeat. That is the heart that doesn’t belong to you nor does it belong to me. That is a place that I’ve lost and I’ve been fighting to get back home– when you’ve been alone for this long, even darkness starts to make sense, I’ve got friends, sure– but if you can’t even face yourself in the mirror and the night echoes much more loudly than your own silence after a whole pack of cigarettes and your breathing is heavy and heaving, which parts of you are left bleeding when you’re all out of love? That love I cannot give to you turns into a million apologies to match each of your stomach butterflies, I know that you might really love me and that’s why I’ve been distant. I know that you might be attached and that’s why I haven’t been texting back and it’s not that I don’t have feelings for you, but these things happen and love messes things up, we had it made with our letters and stars, which part of this do I belong in? Do you only love me because I’m here? Or do you love me for me? That’s the thing, how can you love me for me if I don’t even know who I am. I am not the person that you see. There’s got to be more. There’s got to be more. More than this. This? This is the time when I should’ve walked away, but I hung onto your words. This is the time when I should’ve let the hurt sink in, the titanic sinks twice when it hears our story. Do you love me or do you love the idea of me? Is it because of the flowers and the poetry? I could do without them, can you? I’m a sucker for words and a good story, I guess I’m fucked and you are too. There is a thousand places that I’d rather be and sadly enough, my favorite will be always be the constant searching for an inner happiness that I can’t seem to find. Pills won’t fix the emptiness you feel on your bed. Drugs won’t collapse the holes you’ve got inside of your heart. Boozes won’t numb away the memory when you’re sober enough to realize that you’re still a mess. Love, love– yours, yours. I always leave my letters like that, don’t I? You want to know my favorite words from you? When you said that no matter what happens, you’ll always remember me as the boy who bought you flowers just to see you smile. Those words sing a song that I’ll hum to until I’m old and grey. In these moments, we are the only people that matter even if it doesn’t last. I can’t be the future that you want, I can’t be the person you hold at night and the truth is– my mind has been made up since last week, I’m just finding the right words to tell you, I can’t keep giving pieces of myself away and expect to feel full, I can’t say that I love myself if I run around choosing to love someone else once again and maybe I am a coward for not trying to fall back in love, but love can’t fix the tattered bits of me. They say that soulmates don’t have expirations, you’ll know them when you see them. Maybe I’m the one that tells you that you don’t need someone to tell you that you’re pretty. Maybe I’m the one that tells you that you’re more than what the world has turned you into. Maybe I’m the one that tells you that I’m not the one. I’m not. There’s not enough of me to go around this year, I guess I’m just another one of those broken dreams that’ll keep the stoner up at night.
—  That and this kind of love just isn’t for me.

anonymous asked:

Hello! I just stumbled on this blog by complete accident, and it's interesting to read your posts about akechi! I'm sorry if this actually comes of rude or ignorant or whatever, but i'm genuinely curious about life in orphanages in japan. Your akechi seems to be awfully not fond of it, and i guess the same with go with canon akechi actually. What are you thoughts?

OH MY GOSH? im really flattered that you found them interesting, and im more flattered that you actually want to hear my thoughts on such a delicate subject. youre not being rude or anything!!

i very well cant give proper opinions on a subject without laying down the facts first, though, and surprisingly, other than passing mentions and links to an article or two, no one really talked about just how awful the system is in japan, and in turn how it affected goro, so let me talk about the system while adding in my own commentary


spoilers and very, very, very, VERY heavy text under the cut. im so sorry mobile users

Keep reading


anonymous asked:

I'm just feeling p worthless and I'm sure at some point Maggie has too so can we have Alex just randomly telling Maggie how much she means to her and how amazing she is, how much she loves her. And I need Maggie to be a mess bc haha same.

Same my darling Anon. Same. Sending you so much love: you are worth everything!!! <3 <3 <3

She doesn’t say anything about it on the days when it hits her worst. She doesn’t say anything about it because talking isn’t exactly her style.

But she hits at her heavy bag harder, she takes more risks at work, she takes more shots at the bar, she’s quieter at dinner, she’s quieter in bed.

She doesn’t say anything about it, but Alex knows anyway.

Knows that Maggie tries not to – tries so hard, sometimes, that it tears away at her insides and eats away at her perfect smile – but she knows that Maggie believes the things her exes have said to her, the things her father has said to her, the things the chemical imbalances coursing through her bloodstream and neural pathways say to her, the things the world has said about brown queer girls who think they have a right to be happy.

Knows that more often than not, Maggie Sawyer feels worthless.

Feels like she’s just going through the motions. Like every achievement she’s had is luck. Like every tear she sheds is weakness. Like every struggle she has is fake. Like every break she takes from a job full of death and full of torture and full of iron bars eats away at her value as a person, because how can she be worth anything at all if she’s not spending all her time, every second of it, in service to others?

So on the days when Maggie’s smile is just a little forced; the mornings when Alex catches her just staring at the ground, elbows resting on spread knees, chewing on her lip; the nights when she laughs a little too loudly or doesn’t laugh much at all; the afternoons when she works at the heavy bag until she can barely stand up; Alex makes sure to tell her extra, to show her more, to prove to her… everything.

She’ll bring her lunch at the precinct, and she’ll whisper “for the most beautiful woman in the multiverse” in her ear as she slips it into her hands.

She’ll draw her a bath and take off her jacket and boots when she walks in the door, and she’ll murmur “only the best for the best girlfriend in history” into her ear as she slowly strips off her clothes and leads her to the candlelit bathroom.

She’ll pull her close during game night, when she’s forcing a laugh that’s slightly louder than it would normally be, not detectable to anyone else, but Alex knows, so Alex tickles her, and Alex kisses her ear and ignores James and Winn’s whooping as she teases, “I’m so proud to finally have such an incredible and perfect girlfriend to help me kick these losers’ asses”, and she smiles when that’s what gets a genuine smile to flicker across Maggie’s face, and actually reach her eyes.

She’ll text her in the middle of the day, just because, and the just because texts range from thinking of you, beautiful girl to I hope the best cop ever is having the best day ever to Have I told you lately that you’re more beautiful than the most perfect sunrise? Because… you are to I had an amazing time last night, Mags. I can’t wait to be in your strong, gorgeous arms again.

She’ll stare across the living room at Maggie, pretending to read while Maggie pretends to work, watching Maggie’s eyes just fix on a single spot on the ground, her jaw grinding slightly. And Alex will take off her glasses, and she’ll close her book, and she’ll just straight up tell her: “Maggie, you know I… I’ve never been in love before. But I’m in love with you. Because you are the kindest, most generous, bravest woman I have ever known. And yes, yes, I know Supergirl’s my sister, but Kara doesn’t count, okay? I just… Maggie, you are everything I have ever wanted, and you are just… you’re smart, and you’re tough, and you’re just… beautiful. You’re so beautiful. That’s what I told my sister, you know, the day I came out to her. About you. And now that we’re dating, now that I know you better? Maggie, my life changed forever the day Kara came into my life. And the day J’onn came into my life. And it… it changed, I hope forever, the day you came into my life. Because you… you’re amazing, Maggie. You’re amazing, and I admire you. I admire you and I… I’m in love with you. And that’s… you… you’re worth everything. You are everything. I just… I just want you to know that, in case I don’t say it enough, or show you enough, I just… I need you to know those things.”

And suddenly Maggie is on her knees, on the ground in front of the couch, and Alex tosses her book away and she collects Maggie into her arms, because Maggie is sobbing, her entire body wracked with sobs, with grief, with relief, with disbelief, with I don’t deserve you and why would you say those things and Al, Alex, Al, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry and I don’t deserve you, I don’t, I don’t, I’m sorry.

And Alex is shushing her softly and Alex is rocking her gently, and Alex is kissing her hair and kissing the tears off her face and pulling her closer into her lap and, when Maggie’s breathing finally starts to even out again, she’s cupping her face in her hands and looking her straight in the eyes.

“Maggie, I’m not going anywhere. I’m the one who doesn’t deserve you, but that’s not even the point: let’s just say we deserve each other and call it even, okay?”

This gets a shaky laugh out of Maggie, and Alex kisses her nose.

“You’re worth it, Maggie. You’re worth everything. If I am, you certainly are. Okay? We can be worth it together. Deal?”

There’s a long pause and Alex holds her breath, because she’s never done this with anyone but Kara and maybe she’s bad at it, but then Maggie’s lips are quirking into a smile and Maggie is wrapping her arms around Alex’s shoulders.

“You getting soft on me, Danvers?”

“Always, Sawyer.”


also on


:- ))

Jeremy could tell something was off with Michael from the beginning. His usual carefree attitude is gone and replaced with a tenseness unusual for him. What bothers him most was that he didn’t have a clue of what could be causing it.

The night had started off normal. He had gone to bed after hanging out at Michael’s for a while after school. Just as he was about to fall asleep around midnight, he heard his phone softly ping in the darkness. He had been half tempted to just ignore it until morning, but fortunately he made himself sit up and look at the text message he had received.

Hey im outside ur house lets go for a night drive pls

And, okay, that in itself isn’t unusual. This isn’t the first time Michael has shown up unannounced at his house, but he could feel that something is different this time. Maybe it’s the “pls” at the end. Maybe he’s just thinking too much into it. There’s probably nothing wrong and Michael just couldn’t sleep and wanted to hang out with Jeremy some more. Yeah, that’s probably it.


He’s brought back from his thoughts when the car stops. They have reached an empty intersection, the stop sign glinting from the headlights. Michael is staring straight ahead, hands coming from the steering wheel to rest on his lap.

“Uh, Michael, what’s up? Why aren’t we moving? There’s no other cars…” Jeremy stutters out somewhat nervously, his worry increasing.

Michael continues staring in front of him as he says, “There’s just been something…. Just… buddy, I -” He stops suddenly.

“Michael, please, tell me. I’m wor -” He’s cut off by Michael abruptly turning towards him.

“Jeremy, I’m gonna do something. And it’s a pretty big something, like monumental, okay. I just…” He looks determined, though his voice wavers as he says, “I need to do this.”

“Um, okay. But what…?” Jeremy trails off when a warm hand comes up to rest on his cheek. Michael’s thumb traces lightly under his eye as he smiles softly, nervously.

“Just stop me if I'm… doing anything wrong, okay?”

And, oh God, Jeremy is blushing so hard that Michael surely can feel it. His heart is beating rapidly as Michael leans closer and closer. Is he really going to…?

His question is answered when lips meet his own.

It’s chaste and quick and hardly to write home about, but it was so much more to Jeremy and he could only imagine what Michael must be feeling right now. Even after Michael is leaning back with his hand gone from Jeremy’s cheek, he swears he can still feel the warmth and softness of it all. He’s still blushing profusely and he can see that Michael is too.

Michael becomes more and more tense and nervous as Jeremy continues to just sit there and stare at him, mouth slightly agape and eyes wide.

“Jeremy? I — I’m sorry; I just… You’re so… amazing? And cute and funny and I love everything about you and I love spending time with you so much and I… I’m sorry if I just ruined everything or something, I dunno, I just…” He shrugs helplessly at the end.

Jeremy finally snaps from his stupor and rushes to lean over the center console and place his hands on the sides of Michael’s face.

“Dude, that’s so gay.” Jeremy says because he can’t think of anything else to say that wouldn’t make him stutter and blush even more. He begins to regret those words until he sees Michael starting to grin widely and laugh. Jeremy leans back over to the passenger side and begins to laugh as well. Michael laughs louder as he hears Jeremy joining him and -

Jeremy stops as he takes in the sight. Michael’s eyes are closed and his head is tilted back — Jeremy can clearly see the line of his Adam’s apple from the streetlight shining through the driver side’s window — and this all causes Jeremy to swallow nervously but with a slight giddy feeling. He can’t believe someone as attractive and amazing as Michael likes him. Awkward, stutter-y Jeremy. He almost feels overwhelmed. Maybe this is all just a dream; maybe he had never checked his phone after all.

“Is this a dream?”

Michael looks at him, laughing subsiding but a smile is still there. He takes Jeremy’s hand in his own and kisses him again, harder and longer this time. Thankfully, he pulls back before Jeremy can feel embarrassed about the moan that was trying to push its way pass his lips.

“Did that feel like a dream?” Michael is smirking now, hand still clasped with Jeremy’s.

Jeremy blushes as he shakes his head vigorously. “Not at all.”

Michael laughs softly as leans over.

“Good,” he says, before kissing him once again.


They’re sitting in the car outside Jeremy’s house now.

Michael looks a little disappointed as he says, “Well, I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?” He still smiles slightly, though.

Jeremy wonders why this all feels so awkward because it’s just Michael, his best friend, so why does it feel like he can’t think of the right thing to say? Then he remembers why it’s awkward because things are different now. It makes him wonder what Michael is to him now. What are they? Are they… boyfriends?

“What are we?” Jeremy blurts out, face already a deep shade of red.

“Well, uh, what do you want to be? Do you wanna, like, go on a, you know, a date first?”

Jeremy lets out a breathy laugh as he nods. “Yeah, yeah, let’s, uh, do that.”

“Okay, okay, cool.”

“Yeah, cool.”

A beat.

“Sooooo…” Jeremy starts but stops when Michael starts laughing. “What? What? Why are you laughing?”

“Because, buddy, best friend, light of my life (Jeremy blushes at that), you are so hopelessly awkward.”

Jeremy sputters, “Wha — Hey! You aren’t any better right now! And can you blame me?” He mumbles the last part.

Michael puts up his hands in mock surrender. “No, no, you’re right.”

Jeremy intertwines his hands with Michael’s before he can think about it too much. Michael grins and Jeremy smiles nervously back.

“Do you wanna come inside for a bit?” Jeremy asks.


Moonlight streams through the window of Jeremy’s room. It casts a pale glow on the two of them lying together on Jeremy’s bed. They’re facing each other, curled up and hands together. Both are on the verge of sleep, eyes heavy and breathing slow.

“I think it’s safe to say that we’re boyfriends.” Michael says softly.

“Yeah, but ‘m still expectin’ that date…” Jeremy responds sleepily, shifting closer to him.

Michael smiles, eyes lit up with adoration. “Of course, Jer, of course.”

Never yours

Hi this one shot is to celebrate that i finally got to 100 followers yay! I wrote this a week ago and it’s personally one of my favorites, I hope you like it. 

Genre: Angst 

Length: 1,8k

One shot

Summary: “When you think you could have it all, the reality comes in giving a hard hit” 

“Go on pick a song y/n it’s your turn to choose it” you nodded and stood up from your seat going towards the tablet to choose a song. 

Sistar- Shake it, already sang twice. 

Whistle - Black Pink, for sure in the rap part it was going to be a mess, so no.

Holiday - Girls generation, perfect it was your actual jam. 

You pressed select and it started to play, the girls screamed in excitement and went to there place and started dancing and singing along to the song. 


“It’s a holiday, yeah” you sang the last part and made a final pose looking dramatically to the side while having one hand in your hip and the other one held up. You started to hear loud laughter so all of you turned around towards the seats and saw that the guys had already arrived. All of you were having so much fun so no one noticed when the guys got in. 

“You sure do know how to give a show girls, especially y/n with that ridiculous pose” said Baekhyun between laughter and clapping his hands.

“Don’t you have a better thing to do Baekhyun?” You asked slightly offended while putting your microphone in its place. 

 “Well i do but i just love to piss you off” he said giving you a smile in a mocking way.

“Because of that attitude you have no girlfriend” his smile disappeared when you mentioned that since it was ‘sensitive’ topic for him. 

“Yah, if i wanted i would have a girlfriend since i’m very good looking” he furrowed his eyebrows. “Unlike you, you have a shitty attitude plus your ugly” You also furrowed your eyebrows starting to get angry 

“I’m not like that!” 

“Then give me a reason of why you still haven’t had a boyfriend” he raised one of eyebrows waiting for your comeback. 

“I-i’m just not interested” If only he knew the real reason.

“Yeah sure, it’s just hard to accept when someone’s ugly right?” He said to you crossing his arms over his chest. 

“Yah!” You were ready to lash out at him but Suho stood between both of you.

  Why is it always the same when we go out?” He sighed raising one of his hands to touch his face in disbelief. “Just please stop fighting already and let’s enjoy the karaoke" 

You couldn’t say no, since Suho was like the mama of the group always making sure that everyone was alright, putting order and of course no fights, but the only ones who fighted in the group were you and baekhyun though. 

Your circle of friends consisted of Joy, Irene, Suho, Baekhyun (if he was even considered one) and finally Chanyeol. 

Suho had a girlfriend from Busan so she couldn’t see her always, Irene was dating a guy from another school and then there was Joy and Chanyeol that were a couple. Baekhyun and you were the only ones not dating someone, they tried to pair you up together before, but for obvious reasons it didn’t work out. 

"Okay who wants to choose the next song?” asked Irene. Baekhyun and Joy raised their hand in excitement at the same time, so they went together to choose the next song. 

You started to feel his gaze on you so you turned to look at him and yes indeed he was looking at you. You both stared at each other silently but got interrupted when you heard the next song play. 

 I got a boy - Girls generation, Of course Baekhyun. 

“O-mo!” shouted Baekhyun excitedly gathering with the girls starting to sing the song. “C'mon let’s go join them guys” said Suho standing up from his current place making a ‘follow me’ motion with his hands. 

“I’m okay, i think my throat is starting to hurt from so much singing before” you declined politely. “What about you Chanyeol?” Suho turned to look at him

 "No thanks" 

He nodded and went to join the others singing. You felt your phone buzz on your leg so you took it out and saw his message. 

Chanyeol: We need to talk. 

 You looked up at him and made a 'no’ motion with you head since you were still mad at him at what happened last Friday. 

 'You were getting dressed up so you could leave his house. You sighed at this action thinking it was always the same each time you met up, you both agree to meet up somewhere, have sex and then act as if nothing happened. 

It hurt you that you couldn’t show publicly how much you loved, that you couldn’t be affectionate to him the way you wanted to, that you were the other one. 

It all started at party were you both got pretty wasted and that ended up on having sex, when you woke up and realized what you had done you both promised it would never happen again. But slowly both of you broke that promise from the desire you felt towards each other and turning him someone important in your life. 

“Chanyeol i’m getting tired of this” you said putting lastly you shirt over your torso, you couldn’t see his face because your back was facing him but you knew he probably rolled his eyes at what you said.

“We already talked about this babe” he sighed. 

“I don’t get why you can’t do this, if you have already said it’s easy then what are you waiting for?” You sounded like a bitch, you were supposed to be best friends with Joy but here you are having an affair with the guy she loved. 

“I can’t just leave her like that, she’s going to ask for an explanation, it's going to be weird dumping her out of nowhere" 

 "Then make something up and it’s done” you insisted. 

You heard his heavy footsteps approaching you “It not that easy y/n, she’ll know i’m lying” he bended his legs to your height. “You have to wait a bit more” he said grabbing one your hands caressing it with his thumb. 

“Wait more? Chanyeol you’ve been saying this for two months” you looked at him in disbelief “I can’t keeping acting like nothing when she starts talking to me about you or when she gets affectionate to you! It just hurts to see someone else doing what i want to be doing with you!" 

Chanyeol started to get frustrated he didn’t know how to get out of this situation and you were getting more persistent each time "Babe, just give me one more month okay?” he said caressing your cheek. 

You furrowed your eyebrows and asked him “Do you love me?" 

"Of course I do" 

"And do you love her?” His mouth gaped at your sudden question not knowing what to answer, that action making it a sign that he still did.

Deep down you kinda knew it, since his excuses were getting more and more lame of why he couldn’t leave her so it was easy to find out, but you still had hope you didn’t want to give him up so easily.

You didn’t say anything, you got up from the bed and got out of the room slamming the door behind you.’ 

It was the first time you interacted with him since the discussion and you still were a bit mad at him, you had ignored his calls and text messages all week and even his paper notes that he threw to you during class. 

“Chanyeol: Just five minutes, please love” You internally debated whether to agree or not, your gaze went up to see the others ones were still singing, but it was a different song, everyone looked concentrated in their singing task.

“Y/n: Just five minutes. i’ll see you at the back”

You stood up and silently went towards the exit door taking a last look at the others before you got out. 

5 minutes passed when you heard the back door opening and saw the tall boy. 

“I’m sorry babe please don’t be mad at me anymore” he said caressing your cheek with his thumbs. 

“I swear i’m trying it, but just give me this month i want it to make it slow so she can realize it by herself so it isn’t so hard for the moment i tell her” his looked at you with affection.

“Chanyeol it’s really hard to see both of you being affectionate to each other and act as if nothing. My heart starts to hurt when i see every smile you give to her” your gaze went to the ground. “I don’t want her to get hurt neither Chanyeol, but i’m to selfish, i want to be your one and only” You said wiping a tear escaping from your eye. 

“I know that deep down you still love her, that's why you’ve been putting so much excuses, i’m not dumb” You sniffed. “But please consider also my feelings” 

“You might think that i'm really persistent but i’m like this because i love you Chanyeol i want to be the one with you, i can’t stay like this any longer” 

“I feel like my heart is going to explode at any instant” you gave in and started crying.

He stayed silent searching for the correct words to say, but instead he grabbed your face and gave you a long and soft sweet kiss.

That moment the back door opened making you let go of each other fastly, so you could turn around and see a shocked Joy.

She didn’t say anything, she just stood there in shock, letting her tears fall down one by one. 

“Joy…” said Chanyeol almost whispering, but before he could finish she opened the door and went inside again slamming the door behind her.

This was finally the moment were he had to decide who would he choose, you knew it.

You looked up at his face and his eyes just screamed three words sadness, worry and regret. He was trying to register everything. 

He suddenly started to walk towards the door but you grabbed him by his sleeve before he could even open it.

“Chanyeol…” you whispered.

He didn’t even face you back, he just said “I’m sorry” and pulled his arm lightly making you drop his sleeve, he opened the door and went for her. 

Your breath got heavy, your eyes dropped faster more tears, your knees started to feel week making you drop to the ground with a loud thud.

You felt like dying, you were shattered.

All this time you tried to act as if he was yours, that you had his heart like he had fully yours, imagining that you could have a happy life together as a couple.

But in reality he was never yours.

Middle of the Night

Requested: Can you do one based off the vamps song “middle of the night”? I really love that song and I love your writing just wanna see those two blend.

Your name: submit What is this?


You’re just about to fall asleep when your phone buzzes next to you on your bed. You know it’s well past one in the morning, but you reach for your phone anyway, wondering who would be calling at this time of night. You hope that it isn’t an emergency. When you bring your screen to your face, you see the name on the screen, Shawn Mendes. Part of you wants to let the phone call go to voicemail, after everything, but there is a part of you that desperately needs to know why the hell he’s calling, and that part of you wins.


“Y/n,” Shawn breathes. “Hi.”

“Hi?” You respond, still confused.

“I miss you.” Your heart stops, and you wish he didn’t still have this effect on you. You wish he didn’t still have this much power over you.

“Shawn, it’s too late. You can’t just call me in the middle of the night and say things like that. ”

“I think about it, you know.”

“What?” You’re so confused. He can’t just call you. He can’t, not after everything.

“I messed up. I know I messed up.”

“Are you drunk?” You interrupt him before he can continue.

“No, but I need you.” You can hear the desperation in his voice as those words leave his mouth, and that makes it even worse for you, but you stand your ground. 

“Shawn, do you even hear yourself? Have you forgotten everything that happened?

“No, and I don’t have a good explanation, but I can’t do this without you, y/n. I can’t.” He may be telling the truth, actually, he is telling the truth, you know that because even after everything, you still know him so well. And even after everything, you love him. You still love him, how could you not? 

But some things can’t be changed or taken back. Some damage can’t be undone, and there are some things you’re just not willing to walk back through again, no matter how much you love him. 

“It’s too late.” You whisper under your breathe.

“Y/n,” He’s on the verge of tears now, you can hear it in the way that he says your name.

“Shawn, I can’t. It’s too late.” You’re met with silence only interrupted by the sound of his heavy breathing on the other end of the line. So you do the only thing you still have the strength to do in this moment, you press end call on your phone.

FIC: “The Utterances of Storms” OMGCP, pre-graduation

Bittle, after laughing into his cup of tub juice for a good forty seconds, explains with only a little bit of a slur to his words that he’d need time—his mother would have to ship things and he’d need to bother someone named Katya for music.

Jack can’t hear what Ransom says in reply over the din of the party, but Bittle nods a couple of times and grins, cheeks flushed with alcohol.

It’s probably nothing.


Shitty texts him in the middle of World War II in Europe.

dude get to faber asap

It’s not just the lack of exclamation points that makes him leave class early—something he’s never done before, and the betrayed look that Professor Shahabuddin gives him as he’s sorry-ing his way past everyone else in his row tattoos itself on the part of the brain where the ocean of his guilt lives. It’s not just the knowledge that Shitty has his schedule memorized and would never dare interrupt if it weren’t important enough to rattle the cage of what he calls “The Zimmerbeast” that spurs Jack into running across campus.

It’s the “dude.”

Keep reading

anonymous asked:


I’m so ashamed of this because 
- it’s one month late
- it’s actually slightly angsty (which I’m pretty sure is not what you had in mind)
- it’s kind of all over the place
I’d like to have some kind of excuse but I don’t
Pls don’t hate me too much

There is something quietly sad in the way Alec sometimes comes home and he’s exhausted, drained, can barely stand as he drags himself in the apartment, the door closing heavily behind him.

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t-eleanor  asked:

Could you do angst prompt #50??? Idk I'm just picturing rain in it?? You're the best?? Just fuck me up please?? 🙏🏼

50: “I’m sorry that I fell in love with you” 


the storm that raged on outside of your shared house with tom was almost nothing in comparison to the argument that was brewing between the two of you. you were on opposite ends of the living room, neither of you wanting to be near the other in the moment. your hands were placed on your hips as you bickered, only moving them into the air to amplify your anger and justifications. he stood firmly, arms crossed against his chest, his eyes rolling often as he listened to your accusations. both of you had cold expressions on your faces, an enormous contrast to the loving expressions you usually had when with one another. 

he was always gone, and you understood. you understood he wouldn’t be there all the time, you understood that this was his career and dream. and you supported him. but, tom was the first to swear up and down he’d never let your relationship falter. the first months he was gone were bearable, talking to him and facetiming when possible, and flying out every few weeks. he came home briefly, and was gone faster than he stayed. this time was different, there were texts here and there, a phone call once a week, and he never asked you to fly out. 

“i try, tom, i try my fucking hardest to make this relationship work. i bust my ass to make sure this relationship works when you’re gone to god knows what part of the world, it’d be nice to have some mutual effort,” your voice was laced with frustration and desperation. you wanted him to understand that this wasn’t easy for you all the time and sometimes you just wanted him to make compromises, as any relationship should have. it all started with you making a small comment, as a joke, about him always being gone and he took it in the worst way possible, quickly becoming snappy and defensive. 

you bust your ass? you think this relationship is my ideal one? i’m still here aren’t i?” his bitter words and loud tone made it sound like he was mocking you, a cockiness underlying the response. his eyes were narrowed into a glare, as if he was challenging you. 

“you make this relationship sound like a chore for fuck’s sake,” you said, quieter than anything else that came from you over the course of the argument. you dropped your hands to your side and let out a heavy breath, your chest feeling weighted down as the adrenaline died down and the entirety of the fight was catching up to you. you felt your nails press into your palms, forcing yourself to cease the yelling. “actually, forget it. i’m out of here,” you said, after gaining your composure the best you could under the circumstances. 

tom stood there unfazed, your words not processing yet as you spun on your heels towards your bedroom. you slammed the door behind you once you got into the room, instantly searching for your necessary belongings. when tom heard the door slam, he straightened up, eyes still trained on the spot you previously stood across from him. instead of following you like his gut told him to, he took a seat on the couch, incapable of finding the right words to say. he didn’t want you to leave by any means, but he was angry. he was angry you doubted him, and he was angry that he let himself take out his stress and frustrations on you. 

you exited the bedroom a few minutes later, a duffel bag slung over your shoulders, containing a few basic clothing items, toiletries and other items you found around the room you thought you’d need the next few days. you tried your hardest not to glance at his figure on the sofa, his hands holding his head and gripping onto his hair. he didn’t look up at you, but he knew you were on your way out. 

“so that’s how you’re going to be?” you stopped as you heard him speak, whipping your head towards him. “you want to sit here and nag me for not being here but you’re the first to leave,” his words were painful to hear, finally pushing the tears welled in your eyes to fall. 

“no, tom. you left me a long time ago,” you snapped at him, wiping away the tears as fast as they fell, not wanting him to see your state. his head turned up sharply to meet your eyes, his eyes rimmed with tears. you looked away, not wanting to catch yourself melting and running back to him as soon as he showed a sign of weakness. you shook your head slightly and huffed, walking towards the door. 

“darling,” a nickname he hadn’t used in a long time croaked from his throat, “hold on, don’t walk out on me, please,” he hoped his pleas would be enough, but you opened the door and slammed it behind you. the echo of the slam was enough to make his body go numb, but he quickly gained his senses when it connected that you had just left the house, especially in the midst of a storm. you came faced to rain endlessly pouring down in front of you, a curse leaving your lips. you ducked your head and hurried to your car in the driveway, reaching the driver’s door as tom came flying out of the front door. 

he didn’t care about the rain, bolting towards you. “i’m so fucking sorry, i’ll say it a million times, i don’t know what else to do, but i can’t sit here and watch you leave,” his voice was louder, battling to be heard over the winds and rain that poured down heavily. you shook your head, sniffling softly. you opened your car door, tom running his hands through his hair that was becoming soaked much like yours. 

“you know what, tom? i’m sorry that this relationship was too much, i’m sorry it was an inconvenience, i’m sorry that i fell in love with you,” the harsh words tumbling from your lips that were becoming cold from the unforgiving weather. after you set your bag in the car, tom reached over you to slam the driver’s door shut. his hands gripped your waist, spinning you around to face him. 

“i never, in a million years, want to hear you apologize for falling in love with me because it was the best fucking thing to ever happen to me. i suck at showing it sometimes, but i swear to god i’d lose my world if i lost you.” 

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Clearing the Air//Hanbin Scenario

Originally posted by kimhanbun

Request: Sequel to Cigarette Smoke

words: 1435

A/N: Hi hi, I hope you enjoy. :3 (especially my favourite Hanbin stan @bi-ai)


The ring hadn’t left your finger in months. You treasured it like it was the only thing keeping you alive. Kim Hanbin was your boyfriend. Boyfriend. You loved the word as it fell out of your mouth when people asked.

“He’s different now…” your friend said softly as you ate lunch together. You were playing with your ring absently.

“Different how?”

“I think you changed him,”

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you may now kiss my ass

@cryopods hewwo…. would u like some klance in these trying times

 Read Chapter 1 on AO3

Keith isn’t a fan of weddings. Or at least big, loud ones. They’re always way too chaotic and stressful, and there’s always that one distant relative that gets blackout drunk and passes out on the dance floor. Okay, so that only happened once, but that was enough for Keith to swear off weddings completely. Which is why Keith kind of wants to kill Shiro right now.

Shiro harassed him for weeks about coming to this wedding, and Keith reluctantly agreed only when Shiro promised he’d stay with him the entire time. Yet, he’d bailed not even an hour after the ceremony, and now Keith is stuck at the wedding of a couple he doesn’t even know . Shiro said it was a work thing, but just because it’s understandable doesn’t mean it’s forgivable. There’ll have to be a lot of ass-kissing to make up for this.

There isn’t much for Keith to do; he doesn’t really know anyone, and even if he did, he isn’t a social person by nature. So he mostly stands off to the side, watching everyone from a safe distance. Most people seem to get the hint, and no one makes any move to approach him.

It isn’t until lunch had started that his good luck runs out. He’s in the middle of eating when someone drops down into the seat next to him.

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