They’re really not that crazy I don’t think but fine- but as I had detention at least once a week for 3 years you’re only getting the highlights here:
So again, I only ever got detentions because I was late to school basically every day. Every single day, the office wrote me a late slip with my name spelled horrendously wrong. Different spelling every day. The most famous butchering was writing my name as “Millie Hoagie”. On my very last day of high school, I was predictably late, and they spelled my name perfectly correctly.
So listen my ‘reputation’ in school was basically “quiet good girl who’s never done anything wrong, ever, in her life” and “teacher’s pet” and the like. And despite the fact I was there every time all the ‘Bad Kids™’ who were also always in detention were always incredibly surprised to see me??? Like they never got over it. Every time I walked into the damn room at least half the class would be like “MOLLY YOU DON’T BELONG HERE YOU’RE INNOCENT!!” 😂
Also despite the fact I was basically invisible in the school as a whole all the trouble makers knew me by name because, and I quote a kid from my 10th grade Spanish class who was trying to hook up with me at the time here, “Guys like me are afraid of you, Girl, we’re just plain out scared that we gonna corrupt you!” and I still don’t know what he actually meant by that???
Bu anyway, this apparent rep usually gave me an upper hand with the teachers monitoring the detentions. Because, you know, some were fine, some were bitchy, some were insane. But all of them were pissed about the fact they had to be there instead of heading home.
The rules of detention were literally just ‘stare at the wall and don’t talk’, depending on which teacher they might let the students do homework. But since I was apparently a great person and always had the class’ incredulous response to me being in the room, they usually let me get away with sleeping or reading a book lol.
Of course…no one said any of the other kids were inclined to following the rules lmao. These were like, all the class clowns™ shoved into one room. Things always got real funny real fast.
It would always start off with the coughing game. If you’ve ever stepped into a school you should know what that is.
It would then escalate to everyone in the room playing catch whenever the teacher looked away for a brief moment
Detention was always in the health classroom so someone always tried to steal a limb off the skeleton without being to obvious
Some teachers would let people talk ‘quietly’ so jokes were fucking abound
One time I was minding my own damn business and a kid slides me a note saying ‘in like five minutes ask to go to the bathroom but head downstairs to the English wing’ before he snuck out without the teacher noticing. I get down there and he’s at one end of the hallway and another boy is at the other end. Upon seeing me, these boys run full speed down the hall at each other, leap up in the air when they get to the direct center, high five with full force, both scream in pain, and then hit the floor, clutching their hands. I was cracking the fuck up and trying to convince them to go to the nurse but they wouldn’t listen. I asked the guy why the hell they did that. He told me ‘because we wanted a witness and no one will ever believe you’ 😂😂
One time my sorta-neighbor Mike comes in and the teacher asked why he had detention and apparently, the principal had asked him where to find his friend Jose, and Mike responded “he’s out picking cotton” and the principal flipped out at what he perceived to be a racist joke and gave him a month detention. But the thing was, Jose was in an agriculture class and he was literally outside picking cotton that they had planted there earlier. Jose found it fucking hilarious and refused to tell the principal to get his friend out of trouble.
As I haven’t been inside a school building for quite some time now I don’t know if turtling is still a thing but it was…quite an epidemic for my senior class.
It’s when you turn someone’s backpack inside out right? But it was a full blown war with these kids. Trust no one. Never leave the room. Never look away. Holy shit. One of the best moments of this occurred in detention, when a boy reached to get a book out of his backpack to find it was gone. After 15 minutes of searching the room, he found it, turtled, hidden in a filing cabinet in the front of the room. Everyone, including the teacher, was loosing their shit, because how did someone pull that off so quietly and invisibly without someone noticing??? No one fessed up. The class was in fear of the turtle ninja for the rest of the month, but they never struck again. No one ever discovered who it was.
Guys: It was me.
One time it was raining and the teacher was in a bad mood so he insisted all the windows stay open. He left for a bathroom break or something and this one poor kid, who was now completely soaked as he was stuck with a window seat, just said “fucking bye” and just…climbed out the damn window. Left his backpack and everything. Didn’t see him again for at least a month.
There was one guy who always sold ice cream out of his bag when the teachers weren’t looking. Where he was getting it from and how it stayed frozen is beyond me.
Oh my God sometimes all the indie singer kids would just come and sit on the floor outside the classroom and talk loudly to annoy us??? The hell were they trying to accomplish??? Your singing ain’t special and you won’t be famous, please let us die in peace.
One kid had detention because when we were running laps in gym class he jumped up to hit the arch of the ceiling and accidentally set off the fire alarm. The teacher that day insisted on continuously referring to him as ‘the delinquent’, as if no one else in the room had broken the rules or something
One time one of the gym teachers was in charge of it and long story short he started doing the jersey turnpike. True horror.
One time the teacher got a call and she had to go down to the office and the second she was gone this one kid’s friend runs in with a huge tray going “Y’ALL I STOLE THE LASAGNE CUPCAKES FROM THE FOOD AND NUTRITION CLASSROOM” and we dined like kings.
Everyone would sometimes just break out in song for no God damn reason
One time one of the guys in charge of the detention was A) Not someone anyone recognized as a teacher and B) Potentially Stanley Tucci. Like…I was about 80% certain that this guy was Stanley Tucci.
He refused to confirm or deny or even give a name
One time I was really absorbed in my book when all the sudden a letter flew onto my desk, an anonymous sender that just said “You have a soft, sexy voice.” Neither of which is true, I’m pretty sure, and I could not for the life of me figure out who sent it omfg
One time a teacher was freaking out because he went to a psychic over the weekend and was told there was a lot of activity around him so I looked him straight in the eyes and told him I’m a medium and I can see that the devil had marked his soul and he threw me out of the room and refused to take that class for detention ever again😂
It was a hot summers day. The ceiling fans were on their highest setting. A boy nudges me, with a small carton of ice cream in his hands under his desk. “What do you think would happen if I scooped out a huge chunk of this and threw it at the fan?” he whispered. “Jamil, no.” I pleaded, but it fell on deaf ears. Soon, the room was filled with confused screams.
Apparently all the other regulars™ had bought me candy grams around Christmas time so they were confused when I showed up to detention with no candy and apparently the student council member sent them all to the other Molly in the grade because she was the popular one and this lead to about 12 boys grumbling for two and a half hours like “The one damn time I attempt to be a gentleman” and “I know where she lives” and “Gonna gingerbread her fucking locker” I could not stop laughing
Oh God okay one time the teacher we had was literally. Off the charts.
Like there’s the chill teachers, and then the bitchy teachers. And then this lady. She literally reminded me of Stubel
So I didn’t even know who she was but I walk in and do my shy smile/quiet ‘hello’ thing and take out my book so she immediately zeros in on me as ‘the good kid’ as usual
But she literally seemed to think every other person in this class was a hardened criminal holy shit. She was all over the place barking orders and yelling. And of course, you’ve got a room full of class clowns, like they feed off teachers like this. So the madder she got the more ridiculous they got. I was literally almost in tears trying to force myself not to laugh because I didn’t want to risk her turning on me omfg
So she yelled and flailed about the room and they kept going with jokes and paper wasps and lying about their names and just doing literally every thing they could possibly do so this woman wouldn’t have the chance to rest
This escalated with every minute and came to a resounding end when the teacher decided the Australian Kid™ was chewing gum and picked up the trashcan and shoved his face in it, screaming at him to spit it out as he yelled back “YOU’RE ONLY DOING THIS BECAUSE IM AN IMMIGRANT”
he was in charge of all the bullshit that day and it was hysterical but he wasn’t the one chewing gum loudly that was me
The vp came in to see what all the yelling was about to find a teacher shoving a boy’s head in the trash, one boy shirtless as another drew tattoos on him, the phone off the line with it’s cord wrapped around a kid’s neck, two boys dueling with skeleton arms, one kid with her leg out the window, a kid tying a skeleton foot to the ceiling fan, rubber bands and paper wasps flying from every angle, three people turtling backpacks, someone brandishing an epi-pen, sexual hangman being played on the chalkboard, someone eating ice cream and fanning himself with money, and me, crying into my book with my hand literally bleeding from all my efforts to not laugh at what I was witnessing
We never saw her in detention again😂
My one younger friend got a detention for being late and was really shaken up about it and I tried to tell her she’d be fine but then she got caught sliding me chocolate animal crackers during it, and subsequently got another detention because of this; somehow I was not viewed as an equally guilty party and didn’t get in trouble
This one guy came in complaining “You guys all told me to get a twitter and I get thrown in twitter jail my first day!” “That’s like a thousand tweets in one day, how the fuck did you mange that?” “Bitch I had a lot to say about McDonalds!”
One teacher came in and was like “I don’t feel like helping with homework but does anyone wanna learn how to hack a computer?”
Someone got caught pouring water out the window but when the teacher looked to see why she saw the youngest of the goats™ standing under the window with it’s mouth open waiting for more
One time the teacher wouldn’t let me go to the bathroom and after I asked for like the 5th time he said “It can’t be that important!” so I just pulled a pad out of my backpack and silently sat it on my desk while glaring at him and this 40 year old man looked like he was about to pass out and he finally let me go
I remember our final detention of senior year we were told that if we skip it we can’t graduate so everyone went into that room with a ridiculously nostalgic attitude and one guy finally stole the skull off the skeleton and we fucking tossed it around the entire time while singing and blatantly ignoring the teacher’s complaining lmao
I know there’s more but it’s 7am and this is long so all in all like…I do not miss high school but some memories are bearable lmao
Renji: “you love her right? You should confess…”
Ichigo: *sweats nervously*
Renji: “you shouldn’t keep a nice girl like Orihime waiting.”
Ichigo: “Wha- Orihime? Oh yup yeah, we’re totally talking about Orihime.”
Ichigo: *thank god, it would’ve been awkward of him to tell me to confess to his now wife*
why aren't you swimming in the lake like everyone else? You SCARED of the water? Can you even SWIM?
well, I do have my reasons
pshhh I don't believe. that you're just a SCAREDY CAT
you know, when I was little we didn't have a bridge connecting these two islands; and one was a neighborhood and the other was the town. so we had to swim across if we wanted to get home or had to go out to get some food.
and, you know, I had a dog. He was a good swimmer, and I was around seven years old, so he swam across with me. He was pretty old, so one day when we were swimming across he drowned and I tried to stop and see what was wrong, but then I got caught in the current like he had and someone had to come and save me. So.
oh shit... I'm sorry...
it doesn't matter, I barely remember anyway. It's not a big deal.
So there's this post going around st*ny circles that basically says as a "burn", oh everyone's comparing Steve Trevor to Steve Rogers but "at least Trevor was a real captain" and lmfao what the fuck, do these morons not realize Cap is an actual fucking captain as well. It's not a fucking ~title~ or stage name, it's his goddamn rank, he's O-3 and he earned it because THAT IS HOW WARTIME PROMOTIONS WENT jfc. Ugh. Sorry for the impromptu rant in your inbox, I'm just fed up with this ignorant shit.
I’d be pissed along with you (normally I am whenever I encounter Steve hate) but I’m too amused at their ignorance. Talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face! LOL! When you try so hard to be a hater, but end up looking like an idiot because you got your facts so incredibly wrong.
In other words, you are 100% correct, Anon, and the people who made and are reblogging that post are 100% wrong. Steve was a legit Captain.
Rank insignia for army officers, including the rank of Captain…
Steve Rogers in full army dress uniform circa Captain America: First Avenger
It’s called a field promotion or battlefield promotion. And when you skip a rank it’s called a jump-step promotion. Very common during WW1 and WW2, in fact, very common right up to the Vietnam War when such commissions were replaced by a centralized promotion system.
According to the army website: “Battlefield promotions are predicated on extraordinary performance of duties while serving in combat or under combat conditions.”
Which is how Steve was awarded the promotion.
More on the practice of battlefield commissions: “A battlefield commission is awarded to enlisted soldiers who are promoted to the rank of commissioned officer for outstanding leadership on the field of battle. The granting of a battlefield commission has its historical predecessor in the medieval practice of the knighting or ennoblement of a plebeian combatant on the battleground for demonstration of heroic qualities in an exceptional degree.”
You know what the irony of this situation is? Years ago, circa 2009, a movie came out featuring a young soon-to-be Captain who was promoted in a very similar fashion to the way Steve Rogers was promoted by the end of the movie, i.e. skipping rank to be granted the commission of Captain after leading a courageous mission against a serious threat. That character was James T. Kirk, who, incidentally, was played by Chris Pine. And I once defended Kirk’s promotion in a similar way to the way I’m defending Steve’s rank now, as Kirk, like Rogers, is one of my all-time favorite characters.
I think I must be destined to a life of defending young Captains played by actors named Chris from imbeciles who don’t bother to check their facts before making ridiculous posts. :D
You know, Soule has actually done some really wonderful work in terms of portraying Matt’s blindness in his extremely depressing and frustratingly disjointed Daredevil run. So when people ask if he has a disability, and sort of insinuate that his limitations don’t really exist or are voided out by his super senses, you can actually just respond with these two pages:
Yep. He’s totally got the advantage there. It’s not like this small setback is that serious, lol, it’s just a bomb, a blind man could—
The biggest problem with this boy
is that he doesn’t seem to believe
that he’s beautiful.
This is a problem, of course,
because he knocks the wind out of you
every time he so much as looks at you
and you can’t help but think
that if he understood his own radiance
he would never touch you