i'm so sorry for raping this!

thisloveisastateofgrace  asked:

Hi Katie! I have a question for you. Are you still anti-abortion in cases of rape, incest, or if the life of the mother is in danger? You've probably already answered these, so I'm sorry! But I was just curious as to what your opinion is. 😊

Hi! Thanks for asking! I’m always happy to re-explain my positions, especially on hard cases, because it gives me a chance to practice and to clarify.

Let’s take these one at a time, because they are all very complex.

Rape/Sexual Assault

Rape is wrong. Rape is horrible, evil, despicable…and any other words I can come up with. Rapists should be caught, put on trial, and punished to the fullest extent of the law.

Survivors of rape should be protected. They should be supported, loved, and cared for. They should have access to health care that they need, counseling, and support groups. They should have friends and family around them who love and care for them. If that isn’t the case, communities need to step up and fill those gaps.

We can all generally agree on these things. They aren’t controversial. Pro-life people, pro-choice people, conservatives, liberals, Republicans, Democrats, Libertarians…just about everyone. If someone doesn’t agree with those things, we stare at them like they’ve just grown a second head.

But what about the children of survivors of rape?

This is my friend Patti. We met doing pro-life work while I was in college out in California. She was conceived in rape. Her birth mother chose to place her for adoption, and she grew up loved and cared for. She says:

“I want to say that even though the circumstances of my conception were in violence and hatred, I am not my father, nor am I my mother. I am unique. I was created by a loving God and my life is so valuable. And so is the life of every baby conceived — valuable and a gift from God.“

This is Travon. She was conceived in rape. Her mother raised her instead of choosing adoption, and told her about who her father was after her 18th birthday. Today, she is a speaker, wife, and mother. She travels telling her story and advocating for children like her to be protected under the law.

This is Mary. Her mother had paranoid schizophrenia and was married to a man who also had a mental disability. When her mother was raped, the husband went to the police, but ultimately claimed Mary as his own to protect his wife’s reputation. Because of her mother’s schizophrenia, Mary was cared for by another couple, visiting her birth parents periodically. Eventually, when she was five years old, that couple adopted her.

(More stories at SaveThe1.com)

Do any of these people look like they were conceived in rape? What would that look like? My friend Patti told me that she has heard people refer to those conceived in rape as “devil spawn.” Should they have horns and tails? Should they carry pitchforks?

Or are they children? Teenagers? Adults? Mothers and fathers? Husbands and wives? People?

The circumstances of conception, no matter how violent, how terrible, do not reduce the value of the child conceived. If abortion is wrong because it kills a human being, then it is wrong no matter who that human being’s father is.

What about the mother? Like I said above, I am all in favor of resources and support for survivors of rape. I am all for counseling to help them process and heal. Abortion will not solve their problems. It will not take away their nightmares. It will not take away their fear, their pain. It will only take away the life of their child, who has no guilt in how he or she was conceived.

Meet Darlene. She was not only conceived in rape, but as a teenager she became a victim of child trafficking and became pregnant from rape herself. She says that in order to escape from her captor, she pretended to have an abortion. Now she is married with five children and two grandchildren.

Darlene, despite her own difficult childhood and the way she was forced into motherhood at a young age, has made it her life’s mission to protect the lives of children like her and her oldest child.

She says:

“I am so passionate about the value of every life; whether one is conceived with wine and roses, in a test tube or as a result of violence. I absolutely reject the utilitarian view that people are valuable only if they can contribute to society in arbitrarily contrived ways. We should all hold to the Declaration of Independence’s admonition that each of us is endowed by our Creator with certain inalienable rights: the right to life liberty and the pursuit of happiness. These God given rights are consecutive, not concurrent. Without the right to life, nothing else matters.“

I have included all of these stories here not because they prove my point. I include them because these are the real human beings we’re talking about when we talk about abortion in the case of rape. We need to remember these faces, these names, every time someone says “cases of rape are only 1% of abortions, we shouldn’t be a stickler over 1%.” Every time someone says “a pregnancy from rape is only a terrible reminder for the mother.” Every time someone says “abortion is okay for the same reason that rape is wrong, because of bodily autonomy.”

These are the people we’re talking about killing.

Pro-lifers know that abortion kills children and hurts women. So why should we abandon those women and children who have also been hurt by rape to the additional pain and death of abortion?

Incest

This is very similar to the case of rape, and many people put these two together. However, I gave incest its own section so I could deal with what does make it different.

In the case of incest, we have an extra layer of complexity that makes these cases exceptionally painful. In the case of incest, we usually have a young girl who is raped by a close family member, often her own father. She has been scarred in ways that someone who didn’t experience that can never understand. And now she’s pregnant, probably at a very young age.

What do we do?

First, we get her out of that situation as quickly as we can. We get her to a safe place, and we do everything we can to make her feel safe. We don’t want her to be worried about her rapist coming back for her, at least no more than she has to be.

We put her rapist in jail. We make sure that he is punished to the fullest extent of the law. Perhaps we even find comfort in knowing that in prison, he will be rejected even by other criminals for the nature of his crime.

But she’s still pregnant. And she’s still a child. What do we do?

We love and care for her and her child. We find a permanent home for her, through adoption or through other family members if possible. We give her power over the process as much as we can so she feels like she has some control. We talk to her about adoption and parenting, and we let her make the decision. If she chooses parenting, we work with her new guardians to make a plan for her welfare and the child’s. If she chooses adoption, we give her the opportunity to meet potential adoptive parents and choose the family that she wants her child to have. We give her the choice between open and closed adoption, so that she doesn’t feel like her child was taken from her.

We don’t kill her child.

Just like those conceived in rape, people conceived in incest are still people. They are human beings with the same right to life as any other human being. We cannot abandon them either.

If abortion is wrong because it kills a human being, then it is always wrong.

Health/Life of the Mother

This case is almost more complex, because here we get into the definition of abortion. For our purposes, I am defining abortion as a procedure that intentionally takes the life of the preborn child.

There is one case that comes the closest to abortion being necessary, and that is a tubal pregnancy. In these cases, the embryo implants in the fallopian tube. With current medical technology, we have no way to save the child. If we do not intervene, the child will grow, the tube will rupture, and the mother can die from hemorrhaging. So we have to intervene and remove the child from the fallopian tube.

I do not consider this an abortion. Our goal is not to kill the child, but to save the mother. If, someday, we found a way to save the child and the mother, we would do it. But currently, we can’t. A doctor’s job is to save as many patients as possible, but the loss of a patient does not mean the doctor is a murderer. He or she is only guilty of murder if the patient is intentionally killed.

This same reasoning applies to every other case. It is wrong to intentionally kill the child. However, if the child needs to be removed to save the mother’s life, we can do so. We just need to be sure that we are also concerned for the life of the child, and doing everything we can to save that child’s life as well.

Some will argue that late-term abortion is necessary to save mothers, but this makes no sense. Sure, and early delivery might save the life of the mother. But why should dismembering, poisoning, or beheading that child in the process do anything to improve the mother’s health?

For more on this from an actual doctor (which I am not), watch this video of an interview with Dr. Anthony Levatino. Dr. Levatino was an abortionist and is still an OB/GYN. He worked out of a regular practice rather than an abortion clinic, and so he would routinely do an abortion in one room and then talk to a mother who was keeping her child in the other. He saw patients with complicated and high-risk pregnancies. He knew, even then, that abortion was not necessary. In fact, as he says in the video, for late-term patients an abortion is more dangerous than an early delivery. A late-term abortion might take up to three days, while a c-section delivery could take an hour. If the mother’s life is truly in that much danger, which would you choose?

Every case is different when we’re talking about high-risk pregnancies, but we can tackle each of them in a pro-life way by following a simple rule: treat both mother and child as patients. If we are doing that, we will find the best approach that saves the most lives.

I hope this helps! Feel free to ask for any clarification on anything I’ve said here.

anonymous asked:

It took me half a year to report my rape and now everything is overwhelming. I'm a highly empathetic person so I realize this could ruin his life. I don't want this to happen to another girl, but I also don't want to have this ruin anyone else's life. I suffered enough. Did I do the right thing by reporting? Because I feel as though I didn't.

I’m really sorry to hear about that. You’re certainly right in reporting it, even if you may feel guilty or empathetic. He probably ruined your life, at least to a certain extent with what he did and there’s the chance he may do it to another girl. It may ruin his life but quite frankly, that’s what rapists deserve. He should have thought about that before doing what he did, you know? You’re very strong for reporting it and I hope you’re okay!

anonymous asked:

Okay i looked back at my request and yes it does sound like rape and I'M SO SORRY. I'M ASHAMED.. maybe you just were having sex and he hurt you by accident and you got upset but he comforted you and apologised sincerely

Aggression:

The door slamming shut was enough to joust you awake from the sleep that you had been entertaining for hours. A thin trail of spit was connected from your hand to your mouth causing you to curse silently and wipe off your face rolling on your back. You knew that Namjoon was home, but being so exhausted from your own work day you simply laid there in bed waiting for him to come to you. The air was chilling your bones, but it was nothing the comforter couldn’t fix. You felt yourself drifting back to sleep, but then the door was being pushed open by a fuming Namjoon that was red. His shirt rolled up on his arms and tucked to show his biceps, his black sweat pants baggy and around his waist. You licked your lips watching him move around the room with his freshly dyed purple hair back. He was sinful and beautiful without even trying. You didn’t say too much you just admired him as he threw off his clothes getting ready to shower was what you assumed.

“Come here..” You mumbled with a slight yawn reaching out for him and sitting up so that he would notice you and jump out of his thoughts.

“No jagi. No.” Namjoon warned sternly looking at you with his clothes balled up in his hand as he made his way towards the bathroom.

“I always help..” You pouted looking at him defeated sighing and crossing your arms. Every time that Namjoon was in an uproar you would always help letting him fuck you until all his anger was gone. Usually it got him to calm down enough to have him talk it out with you, but tonight it seemed like he wasn’t budging. He looked at you paused in his stance, gritting his teeth you heard him mumble ‘fuck it’ and set his clothes onto your shared counter before he was walking back to you eyes dark and hooded. Towering over you Namjoon gripped at the back of your hair his hands in your messy disheveled hair pulling it back a little too hard for your liking. His lips crashing roughly against yours Namjoon yanked the cover down passed your exposed thighs letting his free hand hungrily trail up your body until he was sliding it under the only thing you had on which was one of his blue shirts that was loose on your body.

Plunging his fingers inside of your wet heat, Namjoon was anything but gentle his anger consuming the monster inside of him slowly. Your hand reached out to grab at his wrist to slow him down a bit, at least until you adjusted but he was not giving in keeping the same pace up because he knew that you could take whatever he gave to you. Namjoon pulled back from the kiss quickly flipping you on your stomach lifting the shirt up so that he could see your ass. Delivering slap after slap onto your heated skin the male gripped at your hips aligning himself with your entrance.

“Namjoon wait-“ You tried to call out but it was too late, he was surging his hips forward releasing a strangled moan as your walls stretched out and molded to his shaft. He didn’t let you adjust pulling out and slamming back into your heat. Your hands gripped at the sheets as you whimpered and felt your eyes brim with tears trying to take the rough fuck he was giving you.

It wasn’t that you didn’t like rough sex, you did you craved it most of the time he even touched you. But tonight, it wasn’t as if he was fucking you so that you could take care of him like always, he was just so consumed by his anger it was as if he was taking it out on your body and that was something that you didn’t like to feel at all. His hands holding onto your hips too tight, his nails biting into your skin caused you to whine as you buried your face into the sheets shutting yourself up. Namjoon lifted one hand letting his nails rake up your back until he was grabbing at your hair pulling your body up causing you to arch your back. Namjoon’s balls slapped against your ass, as his dick buried deep inside of you cutting your breath short and letting your head spin. He let your hips go completely to let his other hand busy itself with your clit rubbing the throbbing bud like there was no tomorrow. Moaning his name because of the pleasure you couldn’t help but cum for him, all too quickly for your liking. And Namjoon after a few more harsh thrusts followed suit cumming inside of you and letting you go. He walked into the bathroom once he was done turning on some rap music on his phone leaving you there on the bed feeling like a cheap hookup.

Sighing you told yourself not to cry, hands fumbling with the oversized shirt you reassured yourself it was ok as you crawled back under the covers letting more tears pull from your eyes as you stare at the wall in front of you. A lot of thoughts raced through your mind and you didn’t understand how come you couldn’t shake this hurt feeling. It wasn’t like you guys never fucked this way before and most times you did enjoy every second of it, but here and now you felt bitter and you didn’t even know if you really wanted the male to touch you for the rest of the night. You didn’t know how long you had stayed in the same position but soon Namjoon was coming out singing and moving his hips as he climbed onto the bed and under the covers with you. His hands reached out to hold you but out of instinct you jumped from him, your heart beating fast as you sat on your ass looking at the male who immediately went from a dimpled grin to a concerned frowned.

“Jagi?” He questioned reaching out for you but you slapped his hand away curling up into yourself.

“D-don’t touch me.” You whispered softly hands hugging your legs. Namjoon sat up a bit his eyes never leaving yours.

“Did. Something happen while I was in the shower?” He questioned clearly confused on everything.

“Why didn’t you stop when I asked you?” You asked softly looking down at the bed.

“What the hell? When did you say stop?” Namjoon asked again his voice raising causing you to flinch.

“I said Namjoon wait. And you just kept going.” You said softly feeling your eyes brim.

“So, you didn’t want it?!” He questioned again and the harshness of his tone made you jump because now it just sounded like he raped you and that was not at all what you were trying to say. Sighing softly your hands reached up to play in your hair and you shook your head no trying to steady your voice and think of what you wanted to say.

“It’s not that.. You just, usually talk to me about what’s going on before we do it.. And you were so mad, I didn’t feel like you were coming to me to let me comfort but more like we were hate fucking?” You asked yourself nodding. “I tried to grab at your hand but you didn’t take the hint. I told you to wait because I wanted to adjust to you. Usually I’m all for the rough sex but not when you don’t talk to me. I just feel like I’m an object and not your girlfriend.” You admitted chewing on your jaw. Emotions flooded over Namjoon’s face before he was grabbing you to gently pull you into his arms and under the cover. Opening his mouth to let his soft deep somber voice soothe you.

“I tried to warn you Y/N. I knew the moment you called my name what you wanted. And I was so angry, that’s why I told you no. It wasn’t because I didn’t want you. But I know my strength and I know how I get when I’m mad. That being said, you wanted me and I’ll never tell you no, that you know already. I am sorry that I hurt you, and I’m so sorry you felt like an object. Whenever I touch, taste or feel you I just lose myself and it is hard to regain it because you make me lose my mind. That’s still no excuse. And I promise from now on I’ll never touch you like that again until we talk about it. Do you forgive me?” Namjoon asked softly his eyes staring into yours as he tried to get you to smile. His dimples popped out even when he was trying to be serious and the regret mixed with sorrow was enough to make you poke at his dimples and nod your head kissing his lips.

“I forgive you Nams.” You said sweetly cuddling into his side letting him hold you and kiss it better.

~

Alright even in the midst of this, I really had a hard time writing this because it still seems like force and once again anon this subject is a bit too close to home. But I did it, please guys don’t request anything like this or close because I don’t think I’d be able to write it if it’s along the lines of sex and someone getting hurt. Because sex shouldn’t be like that especially when you’re thinking about your favorite bias ;)

I still can’t believe that anti-jdonica Twitter compared jdonica to sangbum??? Sangbum is so beyond vile, it’s past the point of even a happy AU. it’s not even a relationship, it’s one person torturing, raping, and holding another person hostage. It’s literally so absolutely not even CLOSE to comparable. There is literally no AU on the planet in which sangbum is not disgusting. So if you actually think jdonica is even 1% as bad as sangbum…later

As I’ve said before, FICTION MATTERS.

It’s been used to dehumanize and devalue the lives of others.

Representation matters, AND SO DOES FICTION THAT EXCUSES RAPE, ABUSE, OR INCEST.

So don’t give me that fiction doesn’t matter bullshit.

It absolutely does, it speaks about the creator, as a person, and the culture they both live and support by writing or drawing and reproducing their lived beliefs.

And it speaks about you for supporting them too.

I don’t…why do you people need to do this old “fiction doesn’t matter” song and dance anyway?

If it didn’t matter you’d stop being gross and defending pedophiles because it doesn’t matter.

But because it does, to you, you’ll keep defending it, right?

So clearly it does matter.

So flip that around and try to see why it matters to US, having fictional stories that doesn’t GLORIFY treating people like crap.

In WAYS THAT EXIST IN REAL LIFE.

-Deadpool is insecure
-Deadpool has chronic pain
-Deadpool is submissive in bed
-Deadpool is pansexual
-Deadpool lifts up his mask so Hawkeye can read his lips
-Deadpool is a blonde
-Deadpool’s initials are WWW
-Deadpool had an abusive father
-Deadpool’s mother died from cancer
-Deadpool fell in love with a teenager
-Deadpool left her because he didn’t want to hurt her
-Deadpool had a daughter
-Deadpool didn’t believe she was his because she was too beautiful
-Deadpool had to be dragged away from his daughter’s dead body by Cap and Wolverine
-Deadpool carries Hello Kitty band aids
-Deadpool is good with kids
-Deadpool can’t be killed by Ghost Rider because he doesn’t think he’s done anything wrong
-Deadpool hates himself
-Deadpool used to curl up in a ball and mumble about his skin hurting
-Deadpool is married to the queen of the undead
-Deadpool reads his own comics

Conclusion:
Wade Winston Wilson is a beautiful man who must be protected.
adding: Deadpool is a rape victim and he would never, ever disrespect ladies nor try to force himself on anyone (i felt the need to add this especially because most of his dudebro fans trully believe that he would take ladies by force).

Season 5 Episode 12 - Uncanny Valley
  • Reid: These girls are what, like nine... nine or twelve years old, I'm assuming?
  • Doctor: My PHD is on the effect of trauma on prepubescent girls. I do not appreciate what you're implying.
  • Reid: Oh, I'm not — I'm not implying anything. I'm making an inference. An inference is an educated guess, and based on that, I form a hypothesis. For instance, my hypothesis here is that after you raped your daughter, you submitted her to electroshock treatments to make sure she stayed quiet.
  • Doctor: This is outrageous!
  • Reid: And then, out of guilt you bought her toys... more specifically, you bought her a line of dolls. Because that's what serial molesters do, they give gifts. So you continued the pattern with your other patients, and then once they left your care you added their toys to your collection.
  • Doctor: I'm sorry. You can't back up your story... Doctor.
  • Reid: This, this is why I love my job, Doctor, because my lab - it's a jury of your peers, my tests will be Jenny Larson, Abigail Moore and Lynda Kraus. The DA will put them on the stand and I'm gonna personally bring these dolls in and we're gonna watch how they react.

i’m horrified, i’m utterly horrified. this country is going to regress. the atmosphere is dark. i’m so sorry.