i'm seriously tired of trying to work

  • neurodivergent: i'm so tired of neurotypicals being dismissive of my daily struggles, not taking me seriously and urging me to stay silent
  • neurotypical: that's so rude. not *all* neurotypicals. you don't understand how patient i'm being. stop trying to make me feel guilty about being privileged.
  • neurodivergent: this is exactly what i'm talking about
  • neurotypical: shhh now calm down you're getting all worked up
Be happy. Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system. Do things that make you feel good and proud. It can be almost anything. Name something. Yes, sure, try that.
Contribute to the world. Help people. Help one person. Help someone across the street today. Help someone with directions unless you have a terrible sense of direction. Help someone who’s trying to help you. Just help. Make an impact. Show someone you care. Say yes instead of no. Say something nice. Smile. Make eye contact. Hug. Kiss. Get naked.
Laugh. Laugh as much as you can. Laugh until you cry. Cry until you laugh. Keep doing it even if people are passing you on the street saying, “I can’t tell if that person is laughing or crying but either way they seem crazy, let’s walk faster.” Emote. It’s okay. It shows you are thinking and feeling.
Find out who you are and figure out what you believe in. Even if it’s different from what your neighbors believe in and different from what your parents believe in. Stay true to yourself. Have your own opinion. Don’t worry about what people say about you or think about you. Let the naysayers say nay. They will eventually grow tired of naying.
I don’t mean to tell you what to do or how to live your life, but those are some of the things that have worked for me. And I believe with all my heart and soul that if we try the teeniest tiniest bit we can make this world a much happier and healthier one. And if we try even harder, we can do some pretty spectacular things.
—  Ellen DeGeneres, Seriously…I’m Kidding

anonymous asked:

When will you update

//as soon as I cleared things up with my job. They’re still trying to kill ne atm. I’m getting some serious health concerns and seriously considering going AWOL. I’m not even kidding. Sigh…

Also, there are some people who sent me messages, sorry for not replying. I’m not in a good emotional state rn. So I’ll get back to you as soon as I get better.

Okay more of Enjolras, Cossette, and Montparnasse as siblings because it gives me life.

(also this can get kinda stream of consciousness-eque in places, it’s late and I’m tired but I wanted to write a thing so whatever)

The first time Enjolras had a panic attack, it was Montparnasse who helped him down from it.

Cossette was usually the one who knew the exact way to comfort someone; she made sure coffee wasn’t Enjolras’s main life-force and that he occasionally got a decent amount of sleep, she could make Montparnasse become slightly less indignant when he was in a mood, and she provided a sense of utmost relief in Valjean’s life because he had a child that was not Enjolras or Montparnasse. He loves all of his children, he truly does he told himself once while pouring himself a cup of tea to avoid answering the phone call that was inevitably the police station. Much could be said about how much cared for his children’s happiness, but now and again, the joy he felt towards them sometimes went forgotten as he is bailing one of them out for shoplifting and the other for protesting. So to say the least, Cossette is a blessing to all of them.

Cossette, however, was on a university tour. She wrote every emergency number she could think of and posted it on the refrigerator and made Montparnasse —who was home for the holidays— and Enjolras triple check that they knew where the basic necessities in the house were (mostly for Enjolras to know where migraine meds were and that food besides coffee existed in their home—although she also ended up yelling at Montparnasse for leaving his inhaler at university and searching in her purse for his backup, all the while muttering about both her brothers’ lack of preservation skills) before she and Valjean took off to the train station.

Finals, university application deadlines, and entry exams were all fast approaching. Enjolras had always been a perfectionist and that fact had never really taken a toll on him because he was good. He took what would be a stressor to others in great stride, and then set more goals. It was always going to be vulnerable and difficult thing for him to realize that he needs others too, and that never leaving room to take care of himself would catch up with him.

He took advantage of Cossette and Valjean’s absence to immerse himself into work, sleeping very little and staying up much too late. Montparnasse never came home to see him not working. Enjolras was double checking his planner for the topics for the ABC meeting that night, when he noticed the date. The deadline for the  university he was applying to had hit an hour ago. His stomach churned and it felt like his world was coming down around him. He tried to grab his notes for the meeting but his hands were shaking too much. How had he forgotten? He had everything written down for months! He felt like he couldn’t breathe. He knew if he didn’t leave soon he would be late to the meeting but he couldn’t will his legs to move, he could barely think. He just stood by his desk shaking as seconds—minutes? hours?? — he’s not sure really, the world seems like a blur and he can’t breathe — okay the clock says it’s only a few minutes to the meeting. He just has to call Combeferre and say he’s going to be a bit late and oh god what was he going to email the university he can’t do this he really can’t. His breathing is shallow and fast and he wonders if he’s going to pass out from lack of oxygen, tears begin to prick his eyes and he barely registers Montparnasse opening the door until he’s taking the notes for the meeting out of his trembling hands. A steady hand takes his own and gently applies pressure every few seconds— in time with Parnasse’s breathing— he realizes. He tries to match his breathing to it only to dissolve into sobs because he can’t he just can’t breathe. He ends up curling into Montparnasse’s lanky form, burying his face in Montparnasse’s shoulder, who stays silent but keeps the steady pressure on his younger brother’s hand in time to his own breath.

When the sobs and the shudders quiet some, Parnasse sits him down on his bed, takes his phone, and leaves the bed room. He comes back minute later and drops Enjolras’s phone back on his desk and leaves a cup of water on his bedside table. “I told Combeferre you weren’t going to be able come to the meeting today.” Enjolras a nodded thank you, and Montparnasse turned to leave the room.

“Wait, how did you you unlock my phone to text Ferre?”

Montparnasse stopped and raised an eyebrow at him, “Seriously? Your passcode is 1832, I didn’t even have to try to break into it.“

  • *husband walks through the front door*
  • *walks over kisses me on the cheek*
  • Husband: hey babe
  • Me: hey, how was work?
  • Husband: good, how was your day?
  • *as I start to cook dinner*
  • Me: it was fine would you mind unloading the dishwasher?
  • Husband: honestly babe, I'm so tired I worked all day I kinda just wanna relax
  • Me: I worked all day too and I'm still cooking you dinner.... *bitch mode on full activation*
  • Husband: SERIOUSLY, like you are always trying to make me feel bad like I don't fucking help around here, like babe I'm trying okay but it's hard cau-
  • Me: you know what I'm not doing this, I'll have you know LIAM PAYNE would not treat me like this. So you can cook your own fucking dinner and I'll unload the dishwasher into a suitcase cause I want a fucking divorce.

anonymous asked:

Honestly, I'm tired of this self diagnosis stuff. Autism isn't an accessory, it's not something you have an on/off switch for and its not something you just decide you haven't. Everyone screws up in the social world, but try not being able to function there at all. And try having your senses so accute that a seam in a sock feels like a knife of your foot. Oh, and try NEVER BEING ABLE TO WORK PROPERLY. I've lived with this my whole life, and all this does is make people not take it seriously. Ok?

the root cause of self-diagnosis is the pyschology & medical world being terrible. the thing you want to be angry at & rallying against is not self-diagnosis; it’s the underdiagnosis & biased/outdated diagnostic criteria & other prejudices that create the need for self-diagnosis.

also. i personally have dropped out of education with bare minimum qualifications & am now struggling to get a job. mostly right now i barely leave the house or get out of bed. i will definitely never be able to get the job i want (i would love to write for a living but i will never be executively functional enough to manage that). i am in the process of getting a professional diagnosis. 2 of the other mods have a professional diagnosis; 1 of the other mods also dropped out of school & struggles with getting out of bed, let alone leaving the house.

your assumption that to be pro-self-diagnosis you have to be self-diagnosed is worrying & harmful.

we resent the implication that self-diagnosed autistic people are not struggling in the way professionally diagnosed autistic people are. when i realised i was autistic it was an incredible relief because i’d spent the previous 13 years of my life thinking i was lazy & selfish & broken. because that’s what the adults in my life (the ones who were meant to notice i was autistic & help me) told me. & that’s the problem here.

our blog is supposed to be a safe place for all autistic people, including people who are unable to get a professional diagnosis for whatever reason (money, safety, racism/classism/homophobia/transphobia, other forms of gatekeeping, etc), because there are many reasons to not get a professional diagnosis. a professional diagnosis is not the only way.

anonymous asked:

Hi hi Okay I'm like really fat and I really just want to lose weight and I need to but where should I start? What should I do? I've tried many things but nothing works I just eat a lot and yeah I'm very lazy and tired and my body and how much I hate myself kind of makes me want to die :/ I just really really want to be skinny Help please

Hi anon. Hopefully you will find this reply.

I think you need to work on your mindset before you start seriously trying to lose weight. because if you’re in this really negative frame of mind were you’re hating on your body and getting fixated on being “skinny” you could pick up some unhealthy habits. Such as the starvation method of weight loss- which is NEVER permanent.

Before you start changing your lifestyle think

  1. My body is a beautiful temple and I want to start treating it better. I’m doing this because I like myself, not because I hate myself.
  2. This isn’t about looks, it’s more about my health and well-being.
  3. My happiness shouldn’t depend on my weight, that is just one little factor about myself and my life.
  4. Being fat isn’t the worse thing in the world.
  5. A healthy body is the goal- not a skinny one.
  6. Slow and steady wins the race, 2lb a week is a healthy ammount to lose. So don’t put pressure on yourself to lose buckets of weight within the first month.
  7. This is a lifestyle change not a faddy diet. Find balanced manageable meals you can make regularly, and exercises that you enjoy and wouldn’t give up on.

Once you start thinking more positively about yourself you will likely discover inspiration. Some other ways to motivate yourself is looking up yummy healthy recipes and experimenting with food, having fun with your weight loss journey will help you stay on track.