i'm not tagging this joss whedon

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Screenplays are serious business: What it says in the script

Firefly, “Serenity”. Written by Joss Whedon.

alright people here we go

i watched age of ultron for the second time today, paying special attention to all the natasha’s scenes to proper analyze what caused such huge uproar from the fandom, here’s my thoughts on it

problem #1: “they (joss) made natasha a damsel in distress”

alright, here are the facts (what you actually see in the movie):

times that natasha got rescued by someone:

  • when clint helped her up after wanda made her (and the other avengers) experience her worst fear/nightmares/things from her past
  • when bruce got her out of that cell
  • when she had been knocked unconscious from ultron’s attack with the ship and the bullets and hulk carried her to the helicarrier

times that natasha did not need to be saved/saved someone:

  • she was kicking plenty of hydra ass in the beginning of the movie
  • then she rescued clint after he was hit
  • she protected bruce when ultron attacked their party (most probably not only to protect him, but to keep him from going all green and smashing things and probably hurting a lot of people in the process)
  • she retrieved cap’s shield, indirectly(?) rescuing him by returning it to him just as ultron was kicking his ass
  • stole the cradle practically all by herself
  • rejected bruce’s offer to run away and then made him hulk out because she knew they needed to save the day
  • and then pretty much kicked plenty of robot butt until the end of the movie

other things to consider:

  • when she was experiencing her worst fears, everybody but tony and clint were also facing the same situation.
  • when she was stuck in ultron’s cell, she was the one who actually managed to inform the avengers of ultron’s lair-thing location
  • what the frick is she supposed to be impervious to bullets now (ok this one is a bit of a personal opinion sorry)

now let’s all be reasonable here, why the fuck would you think she was a damsel in distress in this movie? were we watching the same movie? does getting rescued once automatically mean that she was a damsel in distress? what about the other male characters that got rescued, why isn’t anyone calling them damsels what’s the male word for it again in distress too?

so there’s my answer to the question of whether or not she was written as a weak character in the movie

problem #2: “natasha thinks she is a monster because she can’t have kids”

and here are the facts:

  • natasha starts the conversation by saying (and i quote, nearly word by word) “i had this dream, the kind that seems normal at the time, but when you wake…” and bruce asks: “what did you dream?” and she answers: “that i was an avenger, that i was anything more than the assassin they made me” (SHE LITERALLY SAYS THIS)
  • natasha asks bruce to run away together and he answers that he can’t have a future, can’t have “this” (he says while wildly gesturing to the room and clint’s house and you know, the whole family house with the cute kids thing)
  • natasha answers that she can’t have “this” either
  • natasha proceeds to tell him about the graduation ceremony where they sterilize her. she tells him it was one less thing to worry about, the one thing that might matter more than a mission, that it makes everything easier, including killing (and i’m almost literally quoting her here)
  • then she asks him if he thinks he’s the only monster of the team

now here are my interpretation of the facts, which are subject to discussion, sure, but i think it’s really obvious??? i’m not really that smart and even i got it

  • natasha doesn’t feel like she’s part of the team. she thinks she fooled herself into thinking that she was like the others, that she’s a good person, but she still doesn’t think she is. she still thinks of herself as a killer and nothing more (despite wishing that she wasn’t)
  • after being subjected to visions of her past, she is visibly shaken up (actually this is a fact, not an interpretation. i should have put it up there)
  • she finds a kindred spirit in bruce, someone that doesn’t seem to fit with the rest of the team and thinks of themselves as a monster.
  • and also they’re both affected by the whole normal family environment of clint’s house
  • bruce, thinking that what she wants is to have the same thing that clint has (family, kids, a home), says that he can’t give her that because it’s not possible
  • and pretty much the only reason nat brought up the whole ‘i can’t have kids‘ thing is because bruce said it first
  • then she explains how they basically took the right to give life from her so that it would be easier for her to take a life, that they made her into this killer, and that’s why she thinks herself as a monster

AND HEY MORE FACTS!

  • during nat’s nightmare sequence thing, we’re shown her training and shooting targets (including a living one) and on and on
  • we’re never shown anything about the not being able to have kids thing, or her wanting a baby and them taking that right away from her.
  • basically her worst fears/nightmares are centered around her being trained to kill

CONCLUSION:

is anyone still under the impression that she thinks she’s a monster just because she can’t have kids?

if anyone still thinks that i’ll be sure to throw plenty more arguments at you

ok?

ok  (◕‿◕✿)

Ok but like Joss Whedon saying that there would be no after-credits scene in AoU because ‘nothing could top the shwarma scene’ made me so mad, so just for you, Joss, I have compiled a list of examples that could have been used for an after-credit scene.

• A preview of Guardians II
• Some kind of lead up to Civil War
• More baby Groot dancing
• Kate Bishop and Clint Barton
• Any of the Avengers dancing to Beyoncé
• A preview to a Black Widow movie
• A preview to a Hawkeye movie
• What the fuck happened in Budapest
• A preview to a Black Widow/ Hawkeye movie, co-starring Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes, and Sam Wilson
• Melinda May, Pepper, Natasha, and Maria interacting
• Peggy motherfuckin Carter because why not
• Natasha’s process for dyeing/cutting her hair so often and still always looking flawless
• Domestic Avengers dealing with each other
• Avengers finding out that Coulson is alive
• Avengers meeting Skye
• Avengers protecting Skye and friends
• A showing of Captain America The Winter Soldier because it’s doubtful that any of your movies will ever top that
• Beyoncé
• That is all
• Also make a Black Widow movie
• Seriously
• Get the fuck on that would you
• No wait actually
• A Black Widow movie by you would kinda suck probably
• Get the Russo Bros to make a Black Widow movie
• Now
• Do it
•Go
•Also fuck you bc the whitewashing was completely unnecessary k bye