Thomas leaned back with a groan, why couldn’t he concentrate. Sure, his dysphoria would get so bad it was distracting but the only thing on his mind was Alexander Hamilton. He couldn’t stop thinking about him.
Not really sure how to feel about it, Something in the way you move makes me feel like I can’t live without you. It takes me all the way. I want you to stay…” He leaned back as he sang sadly and looked at his hand, the same hand that had once been entwined with Alex’s.
‘I’m a broken man, Thomas.’ Alex’s voice had echoed in his mind. Why was it that Alex was the only person who understood him, who understood his struggles and who understood his dysphoria. They were the same.
At least that’s what he hoped. He hoped Alex returned his feelings.
Funny you’re the broken one but I’m the only one who needed saving..” His voice was more choked than normal. This was hell. Why couldn’t he live without him.
“Phone, Phone, Phone.” Thomas muttered to himself, moving papers around his desk to search for his damned phone as it rang incessantly. “I’m fucking going, sweet fucking jesus.”
He finally found it and answered it without checking who it was. “Thomas Jefferson.” He spoke, sighing deeply.
“Jefferson.” Spoke the voice the had been avoiding for a month.
“Hamilton.” He spoke, trying to think of an excuse to not talk to him. It was a complicated situation. “Well, uh, would you look at the time, I’ve got… shit to do. You know people to see, I always enjoy being misgendered.” He spoke with a voice coated in sarcasm.
“Jefferson, cut the shit.” Alex hissed out, angry that this man, the man he had fallen for regrettably was avoiding him. “No one likes to be msigendered. Why the fuck are you avoiding me?”
“Me? Avoiding you? Hahah… Good joke, Hamilton.” He laughed nervously.
“Shut up, you asshat. Meet me at the park near your house, we need to talk.” And with that he promptly hung up and Thomas sighed.
“If I don’t go, he’ll come to me… shit.” He had to go. He got up and grabbed his jacket and house keys before leaving and locking his house.
He waited to awhile before there was a tap on his shoulder.
“Fancy seeing you here.”
He knew that voice. It wasn’t Hamilton. It was….